Resurgence
by werks
Summary: S2-03: This is the follow-up piece to "It's all in the name..." in my second-track series mirroring some of the major events from "Resurrection" with different twists of course while Mason Malevsky himself and even the infamous blue '71 Chevelle play slightly different roles as a split-second's worth of timing will turn things around for our lovebirds almost from the beginning.
1. Chapter 1

Resurgence

 _This is the final installment and the follow-up piece to "It's all in the name..." in my second-track series that explores what might have happened to our favorite Jamko pair had things turned out a little differently in the original opener "He lets me call him Frank now." Under the guise of chaos theory where our little friend the butterfly flapped its wings in a different manner to disrupt the ensuing hurricane, this one mirrors some of the major events from "Resurrection" with different twists of course while Mason Malevsky himself and even the infamous blue '71 Chevelle will play slightly different roles as a split-second's worth of timing will turn things around almost from the beginning. A flashback after the opening in Chapter 1 picks up on Thanksgiving Day and this piece features almost the entire cast of werks-world favorite OC characters as they pull together for a common cause while Jamie and Eddie prepare for their latest addition, including our rescue buddy Rick Fellows who will have a larger role in the action this time and might even get a cute redheaded love interest of his own._

 _If you have not done so, I highly recommend reading the chapters "Magic Beans" for more details on the start of the Danny/Linda saga contained, plus "No Good Deed…" and "Grandmommazilla" for Eva's current position in the "Snapshots II" collection under my profile before starting this one as they take place a few days prior to the beginning and can be considered as prequels to the opening._

 _You can find the lists for both series in my profile since it helps to read them in order, and as always I own nothing, CBS has all the rights to Blue Bloods, I just take their characters out for a spin for fun! Special thanks to lawslave as always for offering to be an invaluable sounding board for ideas and suggestions as these stories are constructed. Without her collaboration these installments would be far less complete and might have gone a totally different way!_

 _As a disclaimer, I always try to do a ton of research online for these stories to keep them somewhat plausible, but I'm not in the medical, law enforcement or military professions so no doubt am open to mistakes in any or all of those areas. Please forgive and remember this is fiction and my staff of one does the best she can!_

* * *

Chapter 1

 _March 13, 11:09 pm_

 _They say your life flashes before your eyes when you are dying... maybe that's true when it's something sudden and a rush of adrenaline courses through your system like a lightning strike, but when it's a long, slow draining process you really have time to sort things out, to remember in exquisite detail all the circumstances that have brought you to this particular place, especially when you are desperate to use anything in your limited arsenal to ward off the pain that is fighting to consume your thoughts and all other resources while it pushes you towards that ultimate meeting with oblivion._

 _Jamison Reagan was keenly aware at this point in time of the intimate feeling of being cold and alone with such notions as he lay helplessly crumpled once more, twisted up in agony on the icy ground against the gnarly trunk of an old tree on a ridge a few hundred yards above and beyond that lonely narrow bridge across the Passaic River where he and Danny had unwittingly met their fate courtesy of Mason Malevsky, his son and that damn old '71 blue Chevelle which had managed to drain so much from his life away already._

 _The blood that soaked through his coat mixed a familiar and sickening smell of copper into the surrounding air, intermingling with the stench of acrid smoke from the burning car that turned his stomach and had robbed him of any voice with which to call for help._

 _Not that there was anyone to listen for it near him now._

 _A few lights remained flashing down there he assumed since he could catch the occasional reflection on a passing low cloud although he couldn't see anything over the small berm he was hidden behind. Units would be assigned to stay and guard the scene while waiting for the Medical Examiner and the detectives to come, but the sound of the sirens had faded away a few minutes ago… their piercing arrival had been such a welcome relief signaling reinforcements had come. He had traced their retreat back up the hill and down the other side before they turned to follow the winding path along the river headed back south towards the city, no doubt looking for a clearing for the chopper to touch down if there was such a need… and he prayed with all his might that there was since it would mean all this was not for nothing, as Danny would say, and that maybe he had succeeded in giving his brother a fighting chance at the very life that would soon be fading away from him._

 _It was so damn cold out tonight._

 _There was no one calling his name… no lights flashing up against the dark cloudy sky indicating an active search ongoing. That would be called for later when it was likely already too late._

 _For whatever reason he had been forgotten or overlooked… left behind ironically as it were by men who had taken an oath to God and country not to do such a thing. They weren't coming for him... that was obvious now and could only mean that his brother had been in a worse spot down in the bottom of the ravine where he had left him. He would be missed and someone would find him eventually, laying up on this hillside... alone and buried under a pile of last autumn's leaves at the bottom of the icy slope he had fallen down in the dark after fighting his way up here… hopping and limping, at times more often than not crawling and dragging himself along on his hands and belly over the unforgiving frozen ground while searching for a signal that might save Danny's life._

 _He wondered how many men and women just like him had laid on hillsides alone like this over the centuries, their last thoughts about the ones they loved before fading out into nothing, the most they could hope for was to be found eventually and taken back to their families to be buried under a flag like Joe._

 _Oh, God. His family. Eddie and the baby… Kaylin, their two little girls, his sweetness and the small one that he hadn't even met yet… the size of a zucchini now, almost 14 inches long with skin that was just starting to turn pink. He marveled at how good it felt actually to remember things like that again while at the same time being consumed by the sadness in knowing that they would all be forced in some way to endure that ceremony with the bagpipes and speeches… his father's aging face at the podium again… the throat-tightening endless line of flashing lights on blue and white cars trolling behind a hearse… or in this case maybe two… No, please, they had to save his brother at least. Kaylin and the new baby... if they didn't have a daddy in their lives at least they needed their uncle… Malevsky couldn't win and take all three of his father's sons away from him._

 _No amount of willpower though would allow him to move against the wall of now familiar searing pain radiating up and down his right side. Maybe Danny was right; he had no business trying to understand what it was like to be a soldier and this whole thing had likely been an exercise in futility. He didn't have it in him. If he had, there was no way he would have let one of his brothers down this way. He had been too late… too slow and weak again..._

" _Stop it, you coward!" he hissed to himself in a pitiful cracked voice as he tried once more to push out of that hollow he had fallen in to no avail except to incite another resurgence of nauseating white hot agony to course up his leg, his knee completely locked at an angle and rigid now… useless… the still-fragile bones above and below it obviously shattered once more… all Doc Kenzie's work, the surgeries, months in rehab were indeed now for nothing even if he defied all odds and managed to make it off this hillside alive, it certainly wouldn't be in one piece. "You... can't... quit now, damn it!… It's not over yet!" he gasped even as he felt his heart threaten to seize up in grief as the thought of what this tragedy would do his family and friends washed over him. "They'll come back for you! They will! Commander Rigsby and those rules... he told you… in the Admiral's speech! I'm not gonna…" he hesitated before gathering strength to dare the universe. "DO YOU HEAR THAT?!" came the now unrepentant challenge. "You can take it… you can rip this effed up leg off right now, but I'm not gonna give up my life without a fight!... I'm not gonna... ring that bell… please, dear God… Joe help me," he begged as his breathing became ragged with emotion once more. "I'm still not ready to be with you and mom yet, they need me… Eddie and my girls… please, I have to stay…"_

 _His breathing hitched once more_ _as_ _he held silent and waited for an answer that was not forthcoming, at least not from anywhere but within his own heart._

" _Iceman," he finally exhaled and then gritted at the ironic reference as he faced his fear and flipped a mental switch. "I will be my best in the darkest moment," he vowed before closing his eyes and summoning everything within to force his mind to focus on what the past few months had taught him after an unlikely journey waged through his own personal hell and private war. It was still over eight hours till the sun came up… eight more hours of bone chilling cold and pain before the dawn. He pulled all the loose leaves and branches he could reach down on top of himself before his chattering teeth and shivering moans gave way to a barely audible sound… one voice raised in song and while weak and terribly out of tune, it echoed through his brain with great enthusiasm, and with it came the power of hope… of mind over matter. "I swam with the sharks and I will sing in the mud," he cried forth in utter defiance. "And I made my own bed today!"_

 **SEAL Rule 1: If you want to change the world, start off by making your bed.**

* * *

6:15 am, Thanksgiving Day

(more than 3 months earlier…)

"DADDY!" came the excited squeal followed by an immediate bounce of the mattress aside of him. "C'mon, p'ease! Wake up!" a little voice begged and tugged on his arm. "We have'ta go watch the big turkeys at the 'rade with Pop Pop today! I 'ready made my bed and _everything!_ Daddy, pretty p'ease… c'mon! See me and wake up now!" Kaylin cried out in full voice and jumped up and down against him as Jamie squinted his eyes shut so she couldn't tell and concealed a smirk while he pretended to remain asleep to tease her. One very rarely needed an alarm clock for an early morning departure if his little girl had a mind to do something special like go to a Thanksgiving Day parade with her father and doting great-grandfather tagging along, and the fact that she had remembered her little newly assigned chore for the day on her own without a reminder made that fully evident. With Eddie's side of the bed empty though as she had pulled another midnight shift and was still on duty, he neglected to remember one important fact…

...they were not alone.

"Jamison, is there something wrong? Is it Edit?" came the familiar voice, but unexpected inquiry from down the hall. Eva Janko was in the house, arriving yesterday on a self-imposed barely announced-in-advance visit which had brought forth a few shockers of its own: a possible move back to the city for the woman known within their circles as mommazilla, and worst of all, what could only be considered as a date with his own father the previous evening as she settled up on some kind of steakhouse bet of their own. It was enough to provide the fodder for nightmares and send shivers up his spine on top of the fact that Eddie had countered with their own news about the little bean she was carrying and he had yet to face down his mother-in-law over that gem after an awkward late-night meeting at the front door the evening before. He turned and snatched a giggling Kaylin up for a morning hug, anyway.

"No, sorry to wake you so early…" he called back as he tickled her and she squirmed in his arms. "We just have a little eager beaver anxious about the parade this morning," he explained.

"Indeed, it seems that way," came the reply back before an unintelligible curse followed by an "Oh… that _cat!"_ and the sound of the guest bedroom door slamming shut as Bear had obviously been successful once again as he set about on his determined stranger-stalking mission with a preferred target for his ninja-like blitz attacks now which brought an instant devilish smile to Jamie's face and a promise of extra tuna in a certain furry someone's bowl.

"Bad kitty!" came the harmonized comments and another laugh between the father and his tiny adopted daughter as he peppered her with a few more early morning hugs and kisses. After a stressful week and a tough end to the previous day's tour which had seen him delivering terrible news to the family of a young man who had succumbed to his own personal demons, Kaylin's special brand of sunshine was a much-needed tonic for his soul and he thanked God once again for her presence in their lives even as another dark force had arrived, perhaps to stay for a while.

"Jamison!" came the muffled cry behind the cracked door down the hall. "He won't allow me to leave my room again!"

"Oh, sorry! I'll get him! Be right there!" he called back before getting up with a quick glance of his phone showing an incoming text from his beloved wife with a "Morning from me and munchie!" and a series of pink and blue hearts showing. Eddie was obviously safe and happy as her shift was winding down.

Despite the daily trials and bumps, Jamison Reagan's life was indeed good right now, and his heart was full even as he rescued his mother-in-law from the wiles of the family pet before tidying up the bedroom, leaving a note for Eddie on her freshly fluffed pillow and changing prior to making a quick breakfast and heading off to their preferred parade-viewing location on Sixth Avenue between Central Park South and 38th Street with a happy, excited three-year-old little girl, her Pop Pop and the surprising addition of a certain Nagyanya in tow.

* * *

 _So this installment will certainly unfold in a different manner than any of the other stories I've written as we started off with a cliffy in the first paragraph and a series of flashbacks throughout will explain exactly what brought this about and how Jamison Reagan ended up alone and injured on that cold hillside above a familiar bridge including what happened to his older brother and why no one has come looking for him just yet._

 _Next, we are still back in time as the family gathers for an interesting Thanksgiving dinner when they are joined once more by Grandmommazilla… er, Eva Janko, who had just been informed the day before about her daughter's new expected unoka bean and has already dropped a near nuclear bomb of her own regarding a possible permanent return to the Big Apple while Danny and Linda remained tight-lipped about their issues regarding her desire for a third child of their own until a knowing father decides to impart some personal wisdom to his oldest son._


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

"Well, Jamie certainly looks more relaxed than he did last night," Henry commented as he sipped a little pre-dinner wine while standing next to his newest granddaughter-in-law after her late arrival while the pair watched from the porch as the annual halftime Great Reagan Turkey Bowl game wrapped up with Jamie, Erin and Sean's team holding a narrow one touchdown lead over Danny, Nicki and Jack as both Eddie and Linda decided to abstain from the action this year while Frank was serving as the referee and Kaylin was anything but an impartial cheerleader as she rooted wildly on the sideline for her daddy's team. "He seemed to have a good time at the parade today. I was surprised when Eva came with us, but then I take it things went okay with your mother? She sure had some unexpected news of her own to share though too."

"Yes, it seems that way," Eddie agreed with a nervous glance behind through the kitchen window where the older Janko woman and Linda were sharing some tea inside on the cool November afternoon. "She's definitely more outgoing with the family now. I just wish I could have been there with all of you… this is the second one I've missed with Kaylin, but Jamie insisted I go straight home to sleep after shift because he knows how tired I get these days," she admitted ruefully. "Sometimes he worries…"

"Too much," Henry nodded as he finished her thought. "That he does," he admitted as he considered his youngest grandson's propensity for carrying the heavy weight of over-responsibility.

"Pop, last night before I left for my tour… when Jamie came home from picking up Kaylin here he was upset about something, but we didn't have time to talk about it," she queried with regret and concern. "It's happened a lot lately since we've been working so many opposite shifts… he's been bottling things up again. I think because of the baby he's been trying to keep the worst away from me… If there's something bad happening at the 3-5..."

"No, no," the older man assured. "He opened up to me; you don't need to be concerned about that. It was just a long rough day with a lot of domestics for the platoon to handle… he was worried about his officers the whole time… you know those can be the worst calls to go on, and they ended with a bad one… a young man put himself off the Williamsburg and Jamie had to notify the family. He takes things like that hard."

"And then I was going out on a midnight again, right?" Eddie filled in the last blank with a frown as she considered her current needed schedule of first or third shifts to work around the daily afternoon sickness. She had caught hell about that again from the new unfriendly Desk Sergeant Alan Dexter at the 12th again last night. A noted long-time hardass towards the female officers, particularly those with children, he had recently transferred in from the 2-9 and had already threatened Kara with a rip when Brandon become ill at the babysitter and had written up third-year Megan Marsh for a similar offense when her child care failed to show and she was late to roll call. Eddie could guess that her new last name had probably spared her from his most obvious ire yet, that and the fact she was willing to trade all her second shifts for third which was the least desired, but now her plan was to try to get transferred upstairs to the detective squad for her modified assignment of desk duty as the pregnancy progressed, and it appeared from a probing conversation with Wilson last night on the topic that a seniority-laden Dexter and his dislike of offering pregnant officers privileged positions would be the main obstacle in her way. Eddie desperately wanted to stay in touch with her rabbi Detective Rivera to keep her dreams of a gold shield alive and had been so excited about putting all that in motion that she had left for shift early the night before even though she'd sensed a stressed Jamie needed her attention. The guilt from that action plagued her all night, and she promised herself she would handle this situation on her own and not add anything else to her husband's plate right now. If she was going to get there, it was going to be without a hook.

"Sweetheart, he worried about you when you were sitting in the car right next to him every day," Henry reminded as her thoughts returned to their conversation. "At least he has you and that little girl now to ground him and take his mind off of things," he nodded to the yard where the contentious game had ended and Jamie and his victorious teammates were being awarded the annual medals to wear with pride for the upcoming year. Kaylin was sitting on his shoulders and giggling while waving the prize at her Uncle Danny. "It's the best thing for him. Soon you'll be adding another little voice to the mix, and believe you me, that one won't be ignored for long either," he glowed with pride at the thought of another great-grandbaby on the way. "He may get inside his own head once in awhile, but this the happiest he's ever been in his whole life," he assured.

"I guess things have been going along so well the last couple of months since the wedding that I get nervous whenever there's a little ruffle," Eddie admitted as she watched her perfectly handsome husband flip his daughter down to the ground so she could continue to tease and chase after her favorite and only uncle until the pursuit ended up in loud laughter as Danny took her down in a big pile of raked-up leaves. Perfect was a good way to describe Jamie, she thought… athletic, responsible, smart, loving and such a good provider of everything else she, Kaylin and this new baby would ever want for. "I hate when he takes so much on himself though. He's even worried about Kaylin's reaction to the news about being a big sister… he wants to make sure she still feels special and doesn't get jealous about sharing the attention."

"Well get used to it; he's wired the same way as Francis," Henry admitted. "He won't change. The two of them can focus on the smallest details for everyone else, yet neither of them will accept a lick of help from anyone if they can help it. Now c'mon," he admonished as he hooked his arm in hers. "Enough of this talk. The big game is over for another year. Let's you and me take that little bitty baby whatever of yours this week and go inside to get warmed up before we eat. Seeing all those big turkeys Jamie chased around the street the other day on the float in the parade has me hankering for a juicy drumstick from that beautiful roasted one we've got in there, but as far as Kaylin's concerned for now we went with that tofurky nonsense," he chuckled.

###

"So Eddie tells us you are considering a move to Park Slope," Erin started the conversation after the prayer as the Reagan family and Eva began to pass the Thanksgiving Day food around. "I've lived there for years and love it," she added as she addressed their guest. "Where's the real estate agency located?"

"Union Street near Prospect Park West and the Grand Army Plaza," Eva responded with a small smile while she reminded herself once more to offer polite warmth as she had kindly been invited to this event at her son-in-law's family home at the last minute. It had been many years since she had felt much more than alone in this world on a holiday and not alienated from her own so was determined to make a concerted effort now to work on that, especially with a grandchild or two in the mix. A certain tiny blue-eyed blond girl had tugged on her heart to open it up once more and she found herself missing the little one and her own daughter from far away, hence the openness to a return to the city she had previously run from in shame after her husband's indiscretions were broadcast through the news cycles. "The offices are in a converted brownstone just a few blocks away from the entrance," she explained.

"Oh, it's very scenic over there with the arch, botanical gardens and the museum," Erin added with interest, having never really had such a good topic which to broach a conversation with Jamie's new mother-in-law and she was determined to use it to her advantage to make Eva feel more comfortable at their table. "I'm on the other end by 15th."

"Indeed," Eva agreed. "It is a very nice neighborhood with a European feel but quite a bit above my limited means for now. I'm afraid if I do decide to take the position I will have to commute a fair distance."

"Oh, Mom… you've always had a good eye for a bargain, and I'm sure you'll find someplace nice close by," Eddie admitted as the thought of her mother's possible move to the city had begun to sink in during the last twenty-four hours since her surprising announcement regarding a departure from Rochester, and the mention of it no longer gave her heart palpitations as Eva had been on her best behavior on this trip and even Jamie had been accepting of the news after the initial shock.

"Well, I think it's a wonderful idea," Frank responded with a welcoming trademark smile that caused his youngest son to raise an eyebrow as he passed the salad bowl. While the circumstances between his father and Eva's dinner meeting the night before had been explained away as an innocent gesture of thanks on her part for his good advice and help during the wedding, the notion of his dad on a 'date' with his mother-in-law still gave Jamie the instant willies… not to mention a rather unforgettable nightmare or two so he was relieved when the conversation turned away to a different topic near and dear to his heart.

"Humph! Who made the cranberry sauce this year?" Henry grumped a little as he tasted the red jelly, expecting his favorite mix of tart berries and sweetened apple sauce which had been a staple over the Reagan generations. "Erin! This isn't your grandmother's recipe! And what are these little orange wagon wheel-looking things in here? They're sour!"

"Sliced kumquats," Eddie smirked and looked up with a repentant smile as she glanced around the table and nudged Jamie. "See, I told you so. Sorry, Pop… that's my doing. Since we talk about it so much I thought I'd incorporate the fruit or veggie of the week into our dinner recipe for fun so everyone could see what size it actually was. I guess maybe I should have waited to start."

"Kumquat," Henry sighed as pursed his lips and studied the tiny orange-like slice on his fork with added interest now. "Eh… that small still, huh? If you say so Martha Stewart. What do you think, Eva? Got room on your plate for one of these?"

"I'm not sure I follow," the older Janko woman frowned as she had not recognized this as part of her new son-in-law's version of baby code words yet.

"The size of the bébiétel now, Anya," Eddie offered softly in Hungarian with a knowing nod towards Kaylin. "Until we explain. Our other option for this week was an olive, and Jamie wasn't too thrilled with that one," she revealed. "He's allergic," she added for her mother.

"So what do we have to look forward to on Sunday?" Nicki asked, still intrigued with this whole baby-making process.

"Arugula salad with guess what… figs, plus pine nuts, and radicchio," Jamie ticked off. "Linda mentioned making pan-seared chops, right?" he smiled at his sister-in-law, but then his face fell a little in puzzlement when he noticed her tight frown. There had been a lot of that lately at these dinners, and while he had assured Eddie just this morning that it was a _fig_ ment of her imagination, now he wasn't so sure, especially with the way his own brother was picking at his plate again… something Daniel Reagan was not known for doing. Jamie offered his own frown back at that realization and made a mental note to confront his sibling about this since it was making Eddie uncomfortable and he could not for the life of him imagine what it was about.

"Well, speaking of things to look forward to," Frank offered in an effort quickly to steer the conversation away from what he was sure now was a touchy subject for Linda, having picked up on that pained, longing look she offered involuntarily whenever the subject of the new baby came up… that same one that had nearly torn his heart in half every time he had seen it on Mary's face in those years after Joe arrived before they had been blessed with the rather accidental birth of their fourth child despite the dire warnings of the doctors and two heavy losses. This was a difficult balancing act though as he in no way wanted to discount Jamie and Eddie's happiness over the presence of their kumquat, or fig, or whatever vegetation was about to follow, and he likewise vowed to have a talk with his oldest whenever the right opportunity presented itself. For now though Frank thought it prudent just to move the topic along to something totally unrelated, or so he imagined.

"Jamie, DCLM Chuck Miller cornered me in the elevator on the way up to the fourteenth at 1PP yesterday morning," he continued as he poured a little more wine in his glass. "Apparently he was contacted by the FBI regarding your vetting process for that round table panel discussion with the House Armed Services Committee in December that you and Rick are slated to attend. Wanted to know why I was allowing my Harvard-educated lawyer son to stay on patrol writing parking tickets when he's moonlighting back in the courtroom and rubbing elbows with the bigwigs in Washington. Says he has an opening for a counsel position in legal starting January first that's yours for the asking."

"Jamie's been working a few hours a week as a part-time legal consultant reviewing contracts for Spencer's company in California," Eddie explained to her mother. "And he's been asked to speak in Washington in two weeks to review the work of an NYPD committee he developed that has been helping the whole police department improve the response and the way we deal with people that are emotionally disturbed," she added with evident pride. "They've saved a lot of lives already, especially when it comes to military persons. We can all see it's working out on the street."

"Oh," Eva nodded as her eyebrows raised and she considered her new son-in-law in a slightly different light. "That's very impressive, Jamison, and would seem to be an excellent opportunity for you to move forward with your law degree," she added in reference to the job offer as despite her apparent recent acceptance of the Reagan family business, she still desired to see her own daughter, and by extension her husband, in a safer line of work.

"Co-speaker, actually," Jamie downplayed the honor in deference to his FDNY compatriot and former-Marine Rick Fellow's work on the project. "And Rick is really going to take the lead in the presentation. It's his insights into what the soldiers are experiencing at those times that have really fueled the changes for those initiatives."

"Well, that's pretty obvious, _Harvard,"_ Danny finally entered the conversation with just an edge of not-quite concealed dripping sarcasm evident as the fact that his ivy-league college-attending little brother had never worn his country's uniform and fought under the flag while he himself had seen two ugly tours in Fallujah was scarcely something he ever let go of, particularly now when the kid was receiving plaudits for it from the candy-striped brass in Washington DC. "Hard to understand something you've never personally experienced... you and those other liberal flag-burners."

"I would _never_ burn a flag, and you of all people _know_ that," Jamie hissed tightly before refusing to get drawn into that contentious debate over legal civil liberties with his brother once again. "Anyway," he cleared his throat with a frown that was more obvious now as he sensed Danny's distaste for his involvement in this work, but it was not the time or place for that tired argument either. "Dad, I hope you thanked Deputy Commissioner Miller for the offer, but I'm happy where I am on the street as a sergeant at the 3-5 now."

"Oh, don't worry, I told him that was probably the case," Frank replied, now sorry for his choice of subject as it had apparently only added to the tension at his holiday table instead of dispelling it. "But the DCLM is persistent, expect that Chuck will be following up with you on this again."

"Perhaps you should do more than consider it, Jamison," Eva pressed once more. "What with the baby… ouch! Oh, um... bébiétel now, _excuse me!"_ she quickly corrected as Eddie kicked her a little harder than intended under the table. "Your schedule could be better managed that way with what I assume are more regular hours," she finished with an eye roll while crossing her legs and smoothing out her skirt with an added glare at her daughter for that not-so-subtle rebuke.

"We're doing okay with that," Jamie smiled at her as he likewise attempted to move on in an effort to keep things civil as the unrest today wasn't necessarily coming from the sources he expected. "Being a little higher up on the pecking order allows me to work my shifts around most things," he added. "One of our other sergeants prefers to take third because of his wife's schedule so it works out generally."

"It must be easier since soccer is over," Nicki added as she referenced her uncle's fall coaching responsibilities for Kaylin's new Police Athletic League team which had ended its season in a memorable game against their crossborough rivals the FDNY U5 Red Dragons. "The undefeated Blue Shieldz," she cheered with a "Number 22, woot woot," and a first pump for the laughing little girl aside of her.

"You would think," Eddie sighed with a shake of the head. "Except that the rest of the parents on the team got together and decided they would pay for an hour of turf time at that new indoor place up on Westmont every Tuesday night at six-thirty so Jamie and the kids can have a play date once a week through the winter," she smirked. "The dads all sit in the sports bar lounge upstairs and have a beer while they take in a game and he babysits, but Kaylin loves it there too."

"No buggies!" the little girl agreed as she remembered her run in with a number of evil wasps in that last soccer game and the rest of the table laughed as dinner continued in a more mannered fashion through dessert.

###

"There's a nice bag of leftovers in the refrigerator with your name on it before you leave," Frank advised as he was sitting in the kitchen having a second cup of coffee and paging through a few ignored sections of that morning's newspaper while the rest of the family was dispersed around the house in a post-feast stupor waiting for the second football game to come on. "Pop and I could never finish it all. I left out the cranberry sauce though," he smirked.

"That stuff was pretty awful," Danny agreed as he took a heavy seat across from his father, already well aware from the tone that there was more to be offered in a paternal way if he opened the door. Maybe it was time. "What makes you think we were going to leave soon?"

"Just a guess," Frank offered with a tight-lipped smile. "There's been a bit of distance with you and Linda lately whenever your brother and especially Eddie is around," he added as he turned the page and kept his eyes down since Danny was usually not receptive to a direct approach.

"Yeah, well we're handling it," Danny bristled just slightly as he wondered how his father did that… he always knew somehow. "It's nothing like it was before, anyway."

"I know that too," Frank sighed before turning the page and daring to take a look at his son's downturned face, knowing he was referring to the past summer's marriage woes instigated by that shooting at the hospital the year before. What he didn't know was that event had indeed revisited Danny's family in another form now as Linda waited to see her neurosurgeon to see if that retained bullet would be the ultimate blow to her wish for another child. "I know a lot about that, actually."

"It's not something…" Danny started with a heavy swallow as he glanced towards the sunroom where Linda, Erin and Nicki were gathered, laughing while plotting strategies for their annual Black Friday shopping excursion while Jamie and Eddie napped in the living room and Eva and Henry were busy going through some family picture books in the den with Kaylin. "We're looking into some things," he admitted in a low whisper. "But, it's ah… it's complicated," he admitted reluctantly without getting into any of the sordid details. "Linda's not ready to… um, you know… accept that, not yet. So seeing Eddie and hearing about it… please don't bring this up to her or anyone else."

"I understand," his father nodded in a sad way. "But I am here if either of you need to talk. I don't want to see any of this come between you and your brother," he warned lightly, sensing now that Danny still had more to say. "If it's not this, then something else has been," he observed.

"Jamie has no idea," Danny huffed as he sat back a little and considered exactly what was bothering him about his youngest sibling right now. Perhaps it was all intertwined… the fact that so many things that were being denied to his own family at the moment were coming incredibly easy at the same time for his brother… the beautiful house of their grandparents' in Bay Ridge that had been reclaimed, extra money from his consulting projects, advancement opportunities he was turning down without concern within the NYPD, a pregnant happy wife and that beautiful little girl that tugged on everyone's hearts. "He's got that damn Reagan idealism, but he's gonna find out someday it comes back to bite you…" he trailed off with a bit of jealousy of his own since his lack of focus on moving up the proverbial department ladder was one of the sticking points that had created this situation with Linda right now. If he had pushed his way forward earlier during his career, the money problems which had held them back for all of these years would have been a non-issue, but Danny had been content once achieving first-grade and sitting at that pay scale for more than eight years with minimal raises that had hardly been enough to keep a house and two children in private school as it were. "He should jump at that chance in legal instead of staying on the street… that he can understand with his big ivy-league brain."

"Daniel," Frank advised. "If your brother was concerned with such things, he could have walked out of Harvard into almost any law firm in the country. This work, it's in his blood like the rest of us… that and his regard for others at the most basic level. He likes being on patrol and the EDP committee… it's his calling, yet whenever it comes up you never fail to offer a rebuke like at dinner today."

"Because he isn't like the rest of us though, is he?" Danny demanded in a hushed tone as his father unwittingly peeled back yet another layer. "He never carried a rifle off a plane in some godforsaken hellhole or saw what goes on over there in places like Korea, Vietnam and Iraq like the rest of us did, and before you say anything, know that I thank God for that and always have. That's why I went over there," he insisted as he slammed his hand down on the table and a trace of long-held but repressed anger showed as Frank had always suspected that his oldest son had not completely dealt with his own demons from those two tours. "So soft-hearts like Harvard never had to be part of that and here he goes getting wrapped up in it, anyway. He was fifteen years old for God's sake when I was away and you want to know how many kids that age I saw over there that would have taken any chance to blow me or my buddies up? I never wanted him to be like that and know about the stuff I had to do… he should stay out of it," he added with a determined scowl. "Those military guys in DC are gonna see right through him and his peace, love and happiness ways, anyway."

"Jamie obviously knows his limitations," Frank frowned, unhappy that his oldest son would hold something like that against his brother and not suspecting he had been simmering on this too or it would have never been brought it up in the middle of a holiday dinner like that... he was on a real roll apparently and cursed himself for unwittingly opening all this up. "That's why he has relied so much on Rick in this aspect. You don't have to be a soldier to care about them."

"Yeah, but you do to understand them. Sometimes it takes one to know one. Has he ever asked you for help on this? 'Cause I see a lot of things that are wrong with what they're doing and my opinion doesn't seem to be worth his dime," he added with a scowl before getting up to retrieve that promised bag of leftovers from the fridge. "Thanks for dinner, but maybe it is time we get going," Danny offered before retreating to gather up his surprised family and take their leave early once more.

* * *

 _Suffice to say Danny and Linda have a good bit on their plates right now, and the discussions between them in the house on Staten Island have been a bit contentious lately once again, so his frustrations have given way a little unfairly to a focus on his brother, but there are deeper things that Danny himself has kept locked up for years that will play a role in how this all pans out. Next, Jamie and Eddie have little discussion of their own, and what starts off as a simple jog to de-stress turns into an early encounter with a certain old foe as the plaid man Mason Malevsky steps back into the picture in this one a bit earlier this time.  
_


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

"C'mon Reagan, you know the last thing you need to do today is tangle up with Dr. Remig again at Kaylin's well baby three-year-old checkup," Eddie admonished in the early morning on Friday as she paused to pour him another cup of coffee at the breakfast bar while declining the same favor for herself. "We've already pushed it off a couple months what with changing pediatricians for her when we moved here. Go de-stress and take your long run for the week or Annabel will be haunting you about that marathon training schedule she has you on. I think I can handle walking sweetness a few blocks up to her appointment and back alone while Mom takes my car uptown for her interview. It's not like she's getting any shots or anything… well, just for the flu, but the nurse said they'll do the nasal mist thing. That's not too traumatic. We'll be fine, or I could drive your car," she teased, knowing that the Mustang was like another child to her fussy husband.

"Yeah, but he's gonna haunt you about her weight again… she's still three quarters of a pound under the lowest acceptable normal percentile," Jamie fretted as he ignored the barb about his usual reluctance to hand over the keys to his precious vehicle and nervously drummed his fingers on the counter. "He makes me nuts… harped on it again when we were there for the wasp bites a couple of weeks ago. I don't want you to get sucked into having them do any crazy testing on her… I swear he wanted to draw half her blood for all those growth studies… C-reactive protein, serum electrolytes, venous blood gas, blood glucose, vitamins, iron..." came the inevitable seething quotes Eddie had heard recanted for the last month whenever the subject came up. "He wanted her to pee in a cup and have us do some sort of 72-hour calorie intake whatever! She does NOT have 'Growth Failure!'" he railed. "That's ridiculous! She's been really healthy except for a few colds here and there and she can scarf down oatmeal cookies like there's no tomorrow… just because she's a little small doesn't mean that anything is wrong with her! Make sure you tell him that she's the only one at her pre-school at St. Anthony's reading above a first-grade level already, because you know she is, and she can already count to…"

"Yes, Dad," Eddie interrupted with a sigh and a hand on his shoulder to stop his run as he was well on the way towards getting his overprotective paternal dander up again. "I agree it's a little unnecessary to put her through any of that stuff, and I'll be sure to tell him she's as brilliant as you and that her early acceptance letter from Harvard arrived last week. Now, please… trust me a little, will ya? We'll keep an eye on her, but I promise we're not going to be like those helicopter parents that hover and worry over every little thing, right? All kids are different, and the kumquat will have enough of his or her own unique screwed up qualities to drive you crazy. I mean we're taking a real chance here mixing Reagan and Janko genes together, don't 'ja think? Consider your brother and my mother combined," she shivered at that notion. "Besides, we have two kids to worry about now, dear. You have to learn how to pace yourself or you'll burn out. Remember we have our twelve-week appointment and ultrasound the day before you leave for Washington, and I promised we could finally tell Kaylin she's gonna be a big sister at that point. We still have to figure out a good way to do that. Somebody's going to let it slip in front of her soon; she's already suspicious!"

"I know, I know," he conceded. "You're right, my beautiful lambchop," he smirked as he sat back on his stool and pulled her onto his lap seeking her soft lips. "Go and do the doctor thing alone so I don't have a meltdown and I'll get my run in while I have the chance. You can take charge like that anytime, you know," he murmured as he contemplated the fact that Kaylin was still sound asleep upstairs and the two of them didn't exactly have anywhere to be for the next couple of hours on this rare shared day off. "Why don't we take this up to the bedroom…" he trailed off as his hands slipped under her camisole before the sound of a door slamming upstairs and an unintelligible curse and comment of "That cat!" reminded him he had neglected to remember one important fact…

...they were still not alone.

"Jamison! Edit? Please..." came the muffled cry once more. "He won't allow me to leave my room again!"

"Oh, sorry, Mom! I'll get him! Be right there!" Eddie called back as she smiled and rested her head against her husband's. "Bad kitty," they both sighed with little smirking smiles. "Rain check," she promised as she barely traced his lips with a fingertip before leaving him with one more long sensuous, lingering kiss to seal the deal and make his heart flutter before slipping to the floor. "She'll be going home on Sunday and we'll have our house back to normal when Bear stands down, I promise."

###

Determined to take his wife's advice about delegating and de-stressing when the opportunity presented itself after a particularly rough week on the job, Jamie exited the front door of their house in his favorite running gear a few hours later while Eddie, Kaylin and Eva were preparing to go their separate ways to the pediatric appointment and interview, respectively. The weather was crisp on the late November day when so many others were occupied with Black Friday sales at the local stores, but not wholly frigid and he had purposely only donned a light sweatshirt over his tee and shorts knowing that his planned 14-mile loop would see him sweating and fatigued with anything heavier. With five months more to train before the big Nashville St. Jude Marathon in the spring he was confident that not only would he be ready for the full distance of 26.2 miles at that point, but the competitive side of him was pushing to see just how far up the finishers list he could go, and he had no intention of letting anyone else from the 3-5 beat his time, especially his feisty little red haired rookie partner Annabel Anderson who was the driving force behind this team NYPD initiative which saw more than half of his platoon training for the event. God help them all if she managed to outrun any of them as he was sure he would never hear the end of it until he took her off probation and assigned her a new permanent partner at the end of her first year. He spent a few minutes limbering up and stretching against the front porch steps before putting in his bluetooth earbud, setting the tracker on his phone, picking a more-mellow distance pace appropriate playlist for music and crossing the quiet residential street while starting off at an easy opening-mile stride down the sidewalk.

He had managed to go only a block or so up the way towards his father's house and his planned destination of Shore Road and Bay Ridge Avenue where he could jump on the scenic trail that ran along the river with a view of Manhattan and the Verrazano-Narrows Bridge from a distance when a sudden chill shook him and he stopped to look quickly behind nervously as the hairs on the back of his neck raised. There was no apparent cause for his alarm though as nothing had obviously changed; there were no cars coming down the road or anything at all seemingly out of the ordinary with the exception of an unfamiliar neighbor doing light yard work a few doors down as the once empty Cap Code across the street had recently been sold into new hands after a few months of vacancy. He shook his head and cursed himself as his feet remained glued to the pavement, positive that it was only a flashback to when Danny had torn into him for not being aware of his surroundings after Lieutenant Carson's shooting that time when Jared Quinlan had followed him for miles on a run. He had been completely distracted after his first appointment with Grace Meherin, the department shrink, on that issue before Quinlan's attempted ambush left that other jogger dead and Jamie fortuitously on the ground next to Bill Anderson's old backfiring truck. The same gnawing pit was in his stomach right now, but this had come out of the blue. There was no reason for it, he tried to assure himself. Quinlan was dead, and they had all moved on with the knowledge that Kaylin was safe from her biological 'father' for good. Still… Jamie just could not shake the sense of unease that had suddenly flooded him. He bit his lip and rubbed his cold hands together, his breath evident while blowing on them before turning back towards home. Eddie had Kaylin all bundled up for their short walk to the doctor's office, and the two of them were just coming through the door to leave when he jogged back up.

"Hey," she startled with surprise while glancing up. "Everything okay? I saw you take off a few minutes ago," she chided. "I thought you were planning on doing the marathon dressed like Spiderman for the kids. If you're already done with that many miles maybe we better look for a Superman costume, or better yet the Flash instead."

"Har, har, har," he kidded back, waffling on telling her what had brought him home so soon, but deciding against it. "My gloves," he covered his intentions as he blew on his hands once more. "I forgot, and it's colder than I thought. Don't want to get frostbite. Give me a second to go get them and I'll walk you and sweetness up to the doc's office."

"Jamie," she sighed as he pushed past her on the steps and popped in the front door to retrieve them out of the basket in the front foyer closet to make good on his excuse. "Dr. Remig's clinic is practically in the opposite direction you were planning to take. What gives?" she demanded. "I told you I'd take Kaylin by myself."

"I know," he assured as he subtly looked around again while pulling on the pair of stretchy fabrics. "I just thought since I came back I'd walk with my girls, okay Edit Katalin?" he demanded as they each took one of Kaylin's mittens and started back in the direction he had come from. "Since when have you ever turned down a chance to be seen in public with such a stud," he stuck out his chest and added with a chuckle and a diligent look around as the trio crossed the still-empty street once more.

"Oh, brother," Eddie sighed with a snort of derision as she was not naïve enough to buy any of this, although she assumed he was just having second thoughts about sending her to the appointment alone. "Tell Daddy he's full of it," she smirked towards Kaylin who was happily holding both of their hands and skipping between them now as they approached the Cape Cod and the new neighbor who was busily bagging a few last piles of leaves from the front lawn.

"You're full of it, Daddy," the little girl obediently replied before stopping short with a puzzled look upwards. "Full of what, Mommy?" she questioned.

"Oatmeal cookies," her parents replied in unison as they laughed and continued on. Convinced now that he had most likely spooked himself unnecessarily, Jamie relaxed and enjoyed their little moment of family togetherness. Soon it would be time to push a stroller through the neighborhood as well and he found himself looking forward to the summer and the arrival of their little bean more and more with each passing day.

"Good morning," Jamie offered politely as they passed the older gentleman at the smaller, more modest house this time. "Welcome to the neighborhood," he added cheerfully before his breath caught in his throat as a pair of gray eyes looked up from their task and regarded them from behind the low, white picket fence with a somehow familiar smile.

"Nice to meet you," the man returned as he leaned on his rake but did not make any effort approach the end of the yard or come any closer. "Name's Mason," he added without quantifying if that was first or last so Eddie assumed the surname given the man's age and the inflection he had used when offering the information.

"Likewise, Mr. Mason," she replied. "My name is Eddie, and this is my husband Jamie and our daughter Kaylin," she added. "We're the Reagans from 801 over there across the street."

"Not mister, just Mason," he grinned back like a cold, dead fish and Jamie felt a shiver of that uncanny sense of recognition sweep over him once more. "Just retired up here from down south and not quite used to this weather. Be safe out there," the older man advised as he looked pointedly at Jamie and pushed his hat down a little and zipped up his plaid flannel coat. "I saw you run by earlier," he explained. "Traffic in this city is something to behold. I don't know how you joggers do it... always gotta be watchin' for cars when you cross the street. Nobody stops for a person anymore," he lamented. "You all have a good day," he added before turning back to his work and the trio continued on their little excursion after his slightly abrupt dismissal.

"Well he was interesting," Eddie commented as they got a little further up the way and safely out of earshot. "Too bad... I was hoping a younger couple might move in there so Kaylin had a playmate or two on the block. Everyone that lives around us is middle-aged or has grandkids," she laughed before noticing that Jamie had gone quiet and introspective all of a sudden.

"Yeah, no," he assured as he fought to push that sense of wariness back down again. "Seemed like a bit of an odd bird though, didn't he? How many people move north when they retire, especially if they don't like the cold?" he pondered, still trying to wrap his head around that strangely familiar demeanor he just couldn't place.

"Okay, now just hold on," Eddie sighed as they continued up the street and made a left at the next corner towards the pediatrician's office. "I sense the infamous Reagan radar going off again. Remember just last month when you saw the glow in the bedroom window down the street and thought cute little old Mrs. Winkler up at 806… all eighty-year-old four-foot-ten of her, had to be growing pot when it turned out she just put her poinsettia plants under lights on cloudy days to force them to bloom early so she could take a picture with her pack of nasty little yappy chihuahuas for her Christmas cards?"

"I wasn't wrong," he muttered back. "She was growing plants… just not the kind I thought."

"Yeah, so this new guy is a little grumpy about the weather and doesn't like New York City traffic," she continued as she dismissed the encounter as just typical old lonely man guff. "News at eleven. Besides, he barely looked at Kaylin or me… only focused on you. Maybe he has a thing for cute knees and running shorts. Really, and you complain about your brother always being suspicious of everyone."

"He is!" Jamie exclaimed. "Plus, I can't figure out what his other problem is lately," he conceded while referring of course to Danny's abrupt departure from Thanksgiving dinner the day before. He had disappeared with Linda and the kids before Jamie and Eddie had even woken up from their peaceful naps on top of one another in the living room. "He's so defensive about this trip to Washington I'm taking with Rick… but it doesn't make any sense. He has never once wanted to talk about any of that stuff with me before, so now when I don't ask him about it he gets… ah, grumpy," he added with careful words in deference to the little ears still perked under the beanie hat between them.

"Well I don't know what's going on with them either, but I am sure we haven't done anything wrong, so it can't be about us," Eddie insisted. "Yesterday Linda seemed fine, and it was your brother that ran hot and cold. By the way, we're here," she reminded as they stopped on the street outside of Kaylin's doctor's office. "Now the peanut and I will get to sit in the waiting room for over an hour to be seen by his majesty for a total of five minutes, while you go free up that big brain of yours on your run and see if you can solve any of the major modern-age puzzles of mankind like why Reagans are all so unpredictable and stubborn, or at least figure out how to stop Bear from pinning my mother in her bedroom every morning, because I've gotta tell you, there's only so much of that she's gonna take before the tables are turned and the tuna hits the ceiling fan."

"Bear likes his fishies, Mommy," Kaylin informed with a little demonstrative hop. "But he can't reach the fan!"

"Got it," Jamie conceded with a smirk as he could sense from the tone that the cat was not the only one in peril due to unwarranted attention and that Eddie was done with having her own detailed escort and had seen through his little charade. He had no doubt in her ability to take care of herself and his daughter, pregnant or not. The Janko women were a force of their own when momma bear mode was activated. "I'll see you both back at the house," he offered and capitulated with a pair of hugs and kisses before setting off on a jog once more down the street to ponder the issues they had talked about although four familiar words continued to echo through his head even as he tried to shake them off and remember where he had heard them offered in the same manner before.

"Be safe out there."

* * *

 _So of course Jamie's sixth sense had good reason to flare as that was our original bad guy Mason Malevsky making his first appearance a little earlier in this installment, having moved into the empty house down the street as before to keep an eye on our trio of lovebirds and their little unhatched egg in the Bay Ridge nest as he plots his revenge against the Reagans and Frank in particular for his own son's death during the takedown of the Blue Templar. Even Mason will find that things do not go exactly according to plan this time as he is forced to reconsider his options and perhaps choose another target to torment and catch the Police Commissioner's attention with this time. More on that to come later._

 _Next, we find out where Danny and Linda stand on her quest for another baby and Frank and Garrett have their first open confrontation in the office regarding his DCPI's reaction to his stepson's death as the Commissioner starts to question whether their working or personal relationships can continue in this fashion._

 _Judging from the reviews, there's a lot of interest in Danny's possible PTSD aspect in this one. Rest assured that it was introduced early for a purpose and will come into play later, but not really until more towards the second half of the story as he will have many *other* things to deal with before we get to that point, like his wife and her current mission, lol. As I mentioned previously, there's a lot of individual storylines to juggle in this one._


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

While his brother was off on his run contemplating his own problems, Daniel Reagan sat back on his couch in Staten Island with a fresh cold longneck, put his socked feet up on the coffee table unrebuked and relished the silence in his own house before breaking it intentionally with a flip of the remote as the sounds and sights of college football's Iron Bowl filled the otherwise empty room with the Alabama Crimson Tide taking on the Auburn Tigers from Bryant-Denny stadium. Black Friday stood for different things for different people… for Erin, Linda and Nicki it had become a traditional kickoff for the holiday shopping season and a cherished girls' day out they looked forward to with great planning and anticipation, for his boys it was a highly anticipated day off from school to spend with friends as they grew older. For Danny and most of the other Reagan men, it had once been a treasured free afternoon to gather together and take in a few more football games and leftovers if they were lucky to have time off from the family business, although that tradition had fallen by the wayside the last however many years as Jamie had tended to draw a rookie's tour before his move up the ladder to sergeant and his father had resumed going into the office anyway. A lot of that probably had to do with Joe's death, Danny mused. In fact, he couldn't remember the Commissioner sticking around the house since then on what had been one of his middle son's favorite days… time spent in the kitchen with his grandfather perfecting this or that reconstrued turkey appetizer to try on them or that God-awful salsa dip he made from scratch that left everyone else who tasted it with bubbling heartburn for the rest of the afternoon. Joe had always been a big 'Bama fan and would have been totally up for this annual matchup, Danny remembered… maybe because the John Jay College of Criminal Justice from New York City University wasn't exactly renowned for its football team. Beggars in this instance could be choosers.

Preoccupied with the start of the hotly contested game, Danny knocked a few more back with a chaser of stale, tasteless tortilla chips and failed to notice the time passing so was startled to hear the squeak of the mail slot opening and closing on the front porch as the almost daily deluge of junk flyers and bills was deposited. Linda must really be hitting the sales hard to be away so long and he frowned as a quick glance at the pile showed a few of those envelopes to be credit card bills after he retrieved them. One thin, rather plain-looking letter with the logo of their medical insurance carrier caught his attention though, and he pursed his lips as he tapped it irritably on the table while debating whether he should wait for his wife to come home before deciding to go ahead without her permission and slide his pinky along the edge to tear it open in a typical messy man fashion. A quick scan of the form letter proved that as expected it was an initial denial for the precertification of Linda's series of tests scheduled with Dr. Jacobs, the neurosurgeon, in a few weeks. The word "elective" was used no less than four times which couldn't be a good omen, he assumed as he was sure those procedures each came with four-figure price tags themselves.

Ever since their initial meetings with her OBGYN, Dr. Geisner, his wife had stayed on her determined course of pursuing this late-life baby possibility while Danny had fluctuated wildly from an absolute "No, we shouldn't do this," particularly when he thought of the long-term implications this could have for Linda's health due to the presence of that bullet still lodged in her back to "Well, maybe…" whenever Kaylin was around with her little girl charms to remind him of what they were missing. Still that brought up another possibility… adoption. Jamie's daughter was such an integral part of the family now that no one would have ever questioned her Reagan heritage or place, even after such a short time with them, yet Linda seemed determined to have another of their very own no matter the risk or cost and Danny knew that this was more than just a desire to expand their family; it was more of a primal womanly urge to be pregnant and feel the life move within her once more, and that had been intensified to a white hot point by watching Eddie just blossom in her early months. Maybe it was even a midlife crisis of sorts as that stage of their existence was coming to an end. Whatever the case, he worried about the consequences for them both if she was denied the opportunity because of physical or monetary reasons and that second blow had just been dealt with the arrival of this letter, although he knew it wouldn't be the end of it. Linda was never one to give up on anything without a fight, it was one of the things that he loved about her, but in this case he hoped that it would not come between them if it ended in a final decision they did not agree upon. She had been happier and more positive these last couple of weeks even in Eddie's presence since that visit with Dr. Geisner and the decision to go ahead with the neuro consult, while he had felt the pressure and insecurity of the situation start to mount, and maybe like his father had insinuated that frustration was now being directed unfairly at his brother for other reasons.

Danny lost interest in the game at halftime and relegated himself to silence once more as he flipped it off and considered these circumstances in quiet solitude until he heard Linda's car in the driveway and the sound of her keys in the front door lock. To cover himself he quickly turned the television back on to see that Alabama had claimed the SEC West win over Auburn with a 30-12 victory. Chalk another one up for you, Joe, he smirked.

"Hey, the boys are still out, right?" Linda asked as she peeked her head through the door with her arms loaded full of bags from the stores.

"Yeah, Lin, but I think they are over the Santa Claus stage," Danny offered as he got up to go help her. Sean had held the torch for the longest time but had given up the ghost a couple of years ago, although at least the family now had Kaylin to carry on for those special early morning wide-eyed present opening memories under the tree, and then next year with whatever little sibling was to follow her. "It's not like you have to hide it anymore. They even gave you a list and the stores to go to. You could have done it all online this time; you're not gonna surprise them."

"Oh, Danny, don't take all the fun out of it for me," Linda chided with a little grin as she came into the room. "There's more in the backseat," she offered with a knowing look that sent him out obediently to fetch the rest and lock up the car. "You should have seen the sales we found. I finished almost all my shopping in one day."

"Well, that's good except it means all the bills will come at the same time," he griped under the load as he returned. "I hope you didn't go overboard."

"I stayed to our budget… mostly," she assured as she sorted through her prizes. "All these go upstairs. We've gotta get them wrapped before Sean and Jack come home. Plus you don't have to worry, I got some extra weekend shifts coming up to fill in for Marcy. She's taking two weeks off to go home to take care of her mother while she's having surgery. That'll be overtime. Why, what's the matter?" she asked as she caught his sullen face.

"Here," he reluctantly reached down to the coffee table and picked up the letter to hand over. "Denied," he offered with no other explanation needed.

"Figures," she muttered as she read through the explanation, anyway. "Don't worry about it," she added with resolve before stuffing it back in the envelope. "I know the woman that does Dr. Jacobs' scheduling. She told me this would happen with our insurer, they deny everything like this upfront. I just need to appeal and he needs to add further documentation so that it meets the clinical guidelines. It'll go through."

"And what if it doesn't, Lin?" Danny asked. "Or what if it does and the results aren't what you want to hear? I just don't want you… I mean I don't want _us_ to have our hopes up and be disappointed," he corrected quickly.

"Danny, I know you're still not totally on board with this," Linda admitted as she took a seat on the edge of the couch after grabbing his hand to pull him down aside of her. "But I have to at least try before I can accept… _if_ I have to accept that it's not meant to be," she teared up. "I know you're worried about the money…"

"It's not the money," Danny sighed. "Well, I mean some of it is, yeah… I won't lie, but I'm more worried about you," he admitted. "That stuff that Dr. Geisner said about the possibility of permanent damage… pinched nerves and weakness from the bullet pressing on them… back spasms and all that. I can't stand to see you hurting either way, and Linda… something like that, having to live in constant pain... I mean I've seen how that changes a person and so have you. Some of the guys I came back from overseas with… at least the ones that managed to come back or the cops I know that were hurt on the job; they were never the same again if they had to deal with that. Even if the chance is low, we can't risk your health. You've made such a good recovery after the shooting…"

"I know, you've said it a hundred times already," Linda reminded quietly with a pensive look that masked her deep determination to go through with this. "We're talking about the quality of the rest of my life."

" _Our_ _lives,_ Lin… ours and the boys. We need you to be healthy and happy for a long, long time," he added as he slid closer and wrapped his arms around her.

"And I promised you that I would move on if any of the doctors feel like it's the wrong thing to do. I swear… you and the boys mean that much to me too, okay? I'll fix this thing with the insurance and then we'll go as far as the tests before we worry about it anymore… those are completely safe, alright? A CT and a simple noninvasive nerve conduction test. Nothing to them, trust me. The radiologist said no to the MRI because of the bullet and where it's located even though Dr. Jacobs doesn't believe the fragment is magnetic. See? We're being extra careful," she assured calmly as she covered herself once more. Knowing that Danny would only dig in his heels and oppose this whole plan if she pressed too hard, Linda had backed off and taken a deliberate softer approach with her husband in recent weeks to placate him even while the urge to have another baby had been consuming her own thoughts at all hours of the day and she often found herself downstairs in the middle of the night or whenever he wasn't home researching things online in the medical journals on her own. "I know you're worried, but I don't want this coming between us or anyone else in the family. I'll admit it's been hard for me to be around Eddie, but I've been really working on that because it's not fair to her or Jamie and I don't want them to know and feel like they can't be happy in front of us. Frank does though, right? I've seen that look and I know you had a talk with him yesterday and that's why we left early."

"Yeah, he figured it out," Danny admitted as he sat back against the cushions and sighed. "He's been there and knows what it's like because of what he and my mom went through before Jamie came along. I remember that too though, Lin," he added as he gripped her hand and shook his head. "I was old enough to know what was going on. She wanted another so bad and I could see how upset and depressed she got when she lost those two babies. I guess I'm just scared of trying this and maybe having that happen to us. Even with Jamie and the new doctor she went to see when she found out she was pregnant with him… we were all just waiting for something bad to happen that whole time, and then when he was born that night… we could have lost them both. I'll never forget that. It still scares me."

"Please, I love you Danny, and I know I'm asking a lot," Linda replied as she squeezed back and offered him a light kiss on the cheek. "But I need this from you right now. Just have some faith a little longer; we're going to be fine no matter what happens," she tried to assure before standing and pulling him up to his feet with her. "Now c'mon, let's go and get these presents put away. Maybe we'll have time to unwrap something else upstairs before Mrs. Ellison drops Sean and Jack off," she added suggestively with a little tug as she sought to disengage his mind from this issue once more since it was her only hope of continuing to move forward. "There's one in a pretty little pink box you might like and I could let you see what's in it a bit early this year."

"Alright," he sighed with a little smirk as he reluctantly gave in again as his wife was adept in handling him and she was on her game in this matter. "And I love you more."

###

While his sons were preoccupied in their own fashions and the resurgence of a Malevsky threat to the Reagan family still unknown, Frank had once more taken refuge in his office at 1PP for the day as Danny suspected and was using the quiet time to clear some non-essential paperwork off his desk and review his upcoming schedule. Having been the NYPD top cop's assistant for several years, Abigail Baker was well aware of his propensity to come into work on this day, and likewise scheduled herself to be available, but the rest of the staffing in the building was very light which afforded them both the opportunity to operate in peace with few disruptions. Despite the calm and her boss's current seemingly peaceful demeanor, Baker still said a small prayer as she hit send to forward him the updated itinerary and personnel list for the upcoming seminars for major metropolitan policing in Washington DC that the NYPD Police Commissioner and many of his key subordinates were slated to attend.

It was clear her plea to a greater deity went unanswered though as it was not thirty seconds later when her intercom speaker buzzed rather redundantly with a sharp bark of "Baker!" when her boss's deep voice resonated out of the open office door at much the same volume, anyway.

"Yes, sir," she answered with a tight look almost immediately from the entryway.

"What is Mark Weller doing on this list?" Frank asked with overt annoyance as he frowned and pushed himself away from the desk to sink further back into his chair. "And where's Garrett's name?"

"Sir, DCPI Moore has stated that he is not available for the latter portion of that week so he advised me to send his assistant instead."

"Half my staff will be at a major three-day conference in Washington that we've known about for six months and he's not available?" Frank gruffed as his once friendly relationship with his former right-hand man and close advisor had become strictly professional since Garrett's troubled stepson Sam's death the past summer at the hands of Jared Quinlan and the subsequent failure of the NYPD and the DA's office to charge Quinlan for the murder due to lack of evidence before the man himself met his own end after being stabbed in prison by a fellow inmate. It was obvious since then that Moore carried a great deal of grief and anger over the fact that he had enabled his drug-addicted stepson over the years… a truth which had led to that unfortunate chance meeting in a squat in Washington Heights where the young man had suffocated to death in a dirty back alley after having his windpipe crushed by a deliberate blow from the wanted cop-killer who was shaking him down for information on Jamie's whereabouts when Sam's ties to the PC's office had been inadvertently revealed.

In the months that had passed, Garrett had carefully maintained his usual level of high workplace competence, so Frank had been loath openly to address his DCPI's private cold shoulder, which was especially evident when anything concerned his boss's youngest, and in fact Moore and his wife had been no-shows at Jamie and Eddie's wedding. How had he compared their two sons? "Two ends of the spectrum… the hero cop versus the druggie that deserved what he got," were Garrett's own words. However, the Commissioner's patience was beginning to wear thin with this arrangement now whether it was due to Moore's inability to move forward or the grudge he still carried against Frank for the judgement he felt from the PC's staunch ethical stance during Sam's initial known run in with the department when the young man had been picked up for making an observed drug buy in the same neighborhood the previous fall, the perceived inaction of the department in investigating the death, or then again later when Frank had seen to it that Quinlan was granted every available benefit after his capture including a transfer to an upstate prison which ironically had ultimately resulted in his demise.

"Did this conflict come up before or after Jamie and Rick's names were confirmed to the fly list?" he wondered as he turned his attention back to the present. The two were set to accompany the NYPD contingent for their overlapping House Armed Services Committee presentation on the work of the EDP Committee.

"I believe it was after, sir," Abigail admitted with unconcealed regret.

"Is he in today?" Frank questioned with renewed ire.

"Yes, sir," Baker responded. "I'll ask him to come up right away," she added as she turned back to her desk without further request as she read his intent clearly.

"You wanted to see me?" DCPI Moore asked flatly as he entered the office with a frown a few minutes later after being summoned while Baker knowingly closed the door behind him. The stress of the past few months had left him aged and significantly drawn although an initial weight loss had buoyed and he seemed to be fitting into his carefully tailored suits well once more.

"Step in," Frank advised as he motioned to the front of his desk and he cut to the chase immediately. "I'm looking at the staffing for that DC conference and wondering why you're suddenly on the bench and trotting out the second stringer. Is there something I should know about?" he challenged openly with an angry tone for the first time as it appeared to him that it was Jamie's presence once more that had Garrett handing the ball off. He was well aware himself of course of the depths of such a loss, having never recovered from Joe as his own presence here today affirmed, but his DCPI had been functioning well with everyone else in the department and had no cause to put any of this on the PC's youngest son, so wantonly ducking out of this trip with the top boss at the last minute hinged on blatant disrespect and that would not be tolerated.

"Mark is competent. He'll…" Garrett began before being almost immediately cut off.

"Backup quarterbacks are labeled competent but don't sell jerseys or put feet under the seats," Frank reiterated as he stayed on his tact. "Best position in sports… no one really gives a damn if you can throw the ball ninety percent of the time and if you screw up, you always have a built-in excuse. That's not what I'm looking for here."

"I am unavailable due to personal reasons," Garrett insisted in his now-familiar vague fashion.

"Which are?"

"By their very definition… personal," Moore huffed in a rather stuffy fashion as he pursed his lips and rocked back on his heels while he got the sense it could not end there this time. "That Thursday is Sam's birthday and Cynthia is not handling it well," he reluctantly informed his boss with a tight look. "She's planning on leaving the city and going down south to visit family."

"Oh," Frank capitulated as he drew a heavy breath through his nose as he sat back with a small nod. Having been in that position more than once it was understandable, certainly those milestone dates were unbearable that first year after a loss, however the need to keep that secret was not and that was what troubled him the most. "Very well. Make sure Weller is prepped then before we leave, please."

"Yes, sir," Garrett acknowledged with a little surprise at the unchallenged about face. "Is there anything else?"

"No, that will be all," Frank advised as he summarily dismissed him. "Send Baker back in on your way out," he ordered as the DCPI turned heel and left.

"Sir?" she questioned from the doorway.

"Confirm Weller for the trip and get me a meeting with Chief Spinella from Personnel first thing Monday morning," he instructed without looking up from his desk. Perhaps the offense needed a boost as they were all off their game and it was time to do some scouting and see what free agents were out there to man the huddle and switch things up.

* * *

 _Ruh-roh. Has Garrett pushed the envelope a bit too far with his insubordination after having been given the benefit of the doubt for months after his stepson's death, or is there more to play out in that storyline that may temper his reaction and Frank's mind about his DCPI as further events unfold? Next, workplace changes are on the horizon for some of our other characters as Eva reveals her decision regarding an offer from the agency here in the city and Jamie and Eddie have an open discussion about their individual career choices with another child coming into the picture._

 _Also thanks so much for the support in the reviews. This installment has snowballed into many things and took a ton of research since I am stepping out of my comfort zones in several areas. We have both current and former military (Navy/Army) in the immediate family, but I am not an expert in that at all and don't want to do anyone a_ _disservice so please forgive if I get something not quite right. I have a few people pre-reading this so hope to fend off any blatant errors._


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

"Geez, Reagan… it's like crawling into bed with a couple of ice blocks down there," Eddie bemoaned as she snatched her super heated tootsies away from the cold radiating from under the blanket covering her husband's feet. "I'm not warming those puppies up for you tonight either so keep them back behind the lines," she advised as she settled herself in at a distance away from him. "And you are so getting an electric blanket for a Christmas present this year or munchie might think mommy got knocked up by Frosty the Snowman instead. Maybe you should have stayed inside this afternoon when you got back instead of spending the rest of the day on a ladder hanging Christmas lights."

"Had to get it done sometime, and for the record my feet wouldn't be so cold if my pregnant wife didn't turn the room thermostat down to sub Arctic levels in here before we went to sleep every night," Jamie ribbed back good-naturedly as he curled his tired body up comfortably on his chilly pillow and suppressed a shiver as he waited for the bedding to warm up, the fatigue from the long but satisfying fourteen-mile run coupled with several hours outside fighting with the holiday decorations having finally caught up with him at this late hour. "I don't have this problem when you're working third and for the record I hate being cold," he added with a yawn.

"Oh, so now you're going to complain when we get to sleep together every night for a whole week for the first time in what? A month?" she griped at the fact that their schedules had been opposite for the most part lately due to Sergeant Dexter's preferences. "It's not my fault my hormone levels are surging and I get hot flushes for hours and cravings sometimes at night. To me it feels like a sauna in here!" she justified with a huff as she fanned her face. "You men are such wimps. Wilson hates when I keep the window of the RMP rolled down too."

"Yeah, and I bet he really hates it when you make him stop for ice cream at midnight when it's like this," Jamie said as he shook at the thought. "It's probably worse for him now than when his own wife was pregnant… twenty degrees outside, why can't you be hooked on hot cocoa?" he grumbled and pulled up the covers, hoping beyond hope that tonight wasn't one of those craving nights as he had forgotten completely to preemptively stock the freezer with her favorite frozen delight and it was a good twenty minute drive back and forth from the nearest store that carried it at this hour.

"No, he whines about it too."

"I'm so not complaining, dear, just making an observation," he assured in an effort to pacify and reached back behind gently to pat her leg. "Besides, you said that all dies down just like the morning… excuse me, afternoon sickness around the lime stage," he offered. "Just another week or so and things can get back to normal and you don't have to work a crazy schedule. Now, can we turn out the light, please? I'm really tired," he begged.

"No, the books say I'll stay a degree or so warmer than usual for some reason until the fifth month," Eddie corrected as she ignored his request. "Well of course I will, I've always been hot," she snickered.

"Oh, brother…" he snorted and shook his head at her guff before explaining. "It's just increased blood volume and flow. God help our grocery bill and anyone that takes meal breaks with you, but that should also boost your D1 football playing frat boy metabolism to near superhuman levels. By week twelve, our baby will be formed with all the necessary parts. Nerves, spinal cord, fingers, toes, hair and nails…" he trailed off softly as peaceful sleep was insistently calling his brain even amid the current disruptions. Eddie, however, was feeling especially chatty after the events of the day and pretended not to notice as she enjoyed his intimate company and had been missing this favored pillow talk as of late while they were apart.

"Reagan… please don't bail on me now. Snuggling with you up here before we go to sleep is my very most favorite thing. Now what else?" she demanded with a little push to keep him awake and in the conversation with an eye towards breaking him down for further missed activities once she got him suitably warmed up.

"Vocal cords," he admitted ironically with a small start as she once again drew him back from oblivion. "Shouldn't be lacking those if he takes after you," he griped quietly. "All talk this one," he mumbled and parroted her by tapping his fingers on his thumb in the air.

"He? He who? What makes you think it's a he? You really want a boy, don't you? Maybe we should start thinking of names… what are your favorites? You know, I was thinking… if we hold to tradition, J-a-m-i-s-o-n… our daughter would have to be named Tequila."

"Oh cripes, Ed… seriously it's late… and Tequila Reagan, that's insane… can't we just do this tomorrow?" Jamie sighed and rolled over on his back while he conceded that sleep would not be coming anytime soon as his wife loved these rambling bedtime talks and she was obviously intent on making up for lost time. "I haven't thought about names yet, and maybe I'm just trying to even the playing field in this house because if we have two girls and they're anything like Erin we'll need to add another bathroom before they're teenagers. Speaking of which, right about now the kidneys begin to function and the baby starts passing amniotic fluid as urine… from an outie not an innie, right son?" he smirked as he leaned down to put a hand on her belly to offer his unborn child a pat and kiss. "That's my boy... it's okay. What's that? No, uh huh... Daddy understands. Mummy's constant chit-chatter is keeping you awake too, isn't it?" he soothed.

"You're such a jerk, and munch _-she_ might have something to say about that," Eddie huffed with emphasis as she playfully pushed him away and refused to dial it back. "Kaylin will be the swing vote and she'll want a little sister when she finds out about the baby," she replied confidently. "Us girls need to stick together and besides, that would give us an even split at the dinner table to keep all you Reagan men in line. It's definitely not a boy," she proclaimed.

"Honey, with your mother here more often now that she's seriously considering taking that offer to work in Park Slope, the Reagan men will need a whole platoon of reinforcements to even the split," Jamie moaned softly as he settled back on his pillow. _Maybe Danny should get on that and off my ass_ , he thought to himself as he considered the fact that his brother could do with some more distractions of his own at this point.

"Yeah, what's with that?" Eddie puzzled as she followed her own train of thought and propped herself up on her elbow to let her fingers softly play across his chest. "A few days ago, news like this would have had you up and pacing the halls all night. You didn't even flinch when she came home from her interview today and told us they made an offer and she was planning on accepting the position to start the first of the year before flying home to Rochester on Sunday morning to start packing and put her house on the market."

"What are you talking about? Everyone knows I'm her favorite son-in-law," he smiled with a stretch as he really was feeling good and filled to the brim with happy, albeit still chilly, relaxing endorphins after pushing himself past the runner's wall to find the natural high beyond it combined with two much-needed days off following a stressful week. "Momma Janko loves me."

"She loves you? Need I remind you that forty-eight hours ago you were having nightmares about this very same thing. And all the papers we came home with from Dr. Remig about those tests he keeps recommending for Kaylin didn't rattle you either. What gives? Did someone spike your water bottle with the good stuff today? Did you collapse on your run or fall off the ladder when I wasn't looking and hit your head?"

"I've evolved."

"Oh, you've _evolved,"_ she mocked even as she curled up next to him and relaxed herself when he slipped his arm around her shoulders. "Wait until my father gets out of prison next year and the two of them are in the same city," she shivered as she considered the vortex that might open up in the sky when her parents met face-to-face again. "That reminds me… we still need to tell Daddy about the new baby. I don't want to do it over the phone, Jamie."

"Right. We can go out there for a visit after I get back from DC. Kaylin has to hear first."

"About that," she prodded knowing this next part might ultimately break her husband's peaceful state, but this was the most affable he had ever been about her family and the closest shot she would ever get towards discussing the next fact. "The holidays are coming up and he really would like to see his granddaughter in person," she added quietly and immediately felt Jamie go rigid next to her.

"Our daughter is _not_ meeting her grandfather for the first time in a prison visitation center," he replied coldly. "Final answer."

"Okay, well you were so far evolved there for a minute I thought it was worth a shot," Eddie conceded without pushing the issue any further. As supportive as Jamie had been about her father's legal predicament in the past, she knew asking him to expose Kaylin to that was way past his comfort zone and, in all honesty, her own as well. The poor little girl had enough personal links to the penal system with her dead cop-killing bio dad and druggie mother. Armin Janko would just have to wait until his release the following summer and meet both of his grandchildren at once. "I am happy about Mom being closer though. I feel like we've really come a long way together this fall since the wedding, besides Kaylin loves her and what with our schedules the way they are we can always use another trusted babysitter, don't you think? She's already saving our butts tomorrow by keeping her while we're both at work and it's only gonna get worse when there are two. Henry can barely keep up with one now… a three-year-old and new baby will be too much for him. Two in daycare full time is practically my salary," she complained.

"I know, that's why we talked about you staying on modified assignment a little longer… at least through the summer so you have a regular shift I can schedule around," Jamie reminded as he was fully awake at least for a minute now after that little jolt out of the blue about his father-in-law. "Kaylin can go to preschool on their five-day schedule next fall which will help after that. If you took the spot Dad offered you in Personnel at 1PP he'd be able to help take the baby in and out at the daycare there if we got into a jam."

"But then I lose touch with my rabbi Detective Rivera at the 12th," Eddie fretted although she resolved to continue to keep her ongoing dispute with the mommy-cop hating Sergeant Dexter under the radar. The last thing she wanted was for Jamie or any of the other Reagans to get involved and assert any undue influence over the situation with other eyes watching her and no doubt judging her ability to handle things on her own merit. "I'm still trying to see if I can get myself assigned for desk duty up in the squad."

"Okay, but you're going to have to make a move soon," Jamie added with a little worry at her indecision now as he rolled over and put a soft hand on her once more. "You said once you started to show you would come off patrol," he reminded as he traced her beautiful little poochy belly outline which was just beginning to become more prominent. "1PP would be more convenient and better for the baby… and maybe smarter too with the way things are in the world right now. Having two parents out there on the street at the same time might not be the best thing to do for our kids either," he added with deep regret while reliving some of the anti-police headlines and actions which had occurred around the country lately although thankfully not here at home in the NYPD as of yet.

"And if it was just about making it easy and safer, you could accept DCLM Miller's offer in Legal there and we could have that, more money and _you_ would be off patrol with a permanent regular schedule like Mom said," Eddie replied with just a hint of frustration in her voice. "My goals and what I do on the job are just as important to me as you wanting to stay on the street at the 3-5, Jamie."

"I know, lambchop," he admitted as he gave her a supportive kiss and another hug. "I don't want you to give up on your dream of being a detective and getting your gold shield. It's harder for you trying to do all this though… to get married and have your name changed to Reagan while making another human being all at the same time. I understand that. We'll figure it out though, right, hun?" he asked. "Things always work out for the best one way or another, don't they? If it wasn't for that damn tequila we bought on the honeymoon, none of this would have been an issue yet, but then Kaylin would have had to wait longer to become a big sister and I know she's gonna be really excited about it. I keep trying to reinforce that every time we see her friends at school or practice with their little siblings. As soon as we get the new ultrasound pictures at your next appointment, we can sit her down and reveal the bean, or the fig for that matter," he laughed. "It's so close now... I can't wait."

"Me either. We have to do it that night before you leave on your trip. I can't hide it a minute longer," Eddie smiled as she relaxed once more since he had backed off on forcing her into a decision about work just yet, although like he said the clock was ticking down on that and if she was unable to work a spot open upstairs in the squad, it would come down to staying at the 12th and answering phones at the front desk next to Sergeant Dexter for the next nine months, or a move to 1PP doing likewise with better company and a few added perks.

"That sounds good. It's a plan," Jamie nodded agreeably as his eyes started to droop shut and his breathing began to deepen once more while he slipped back into his serene state as the hour advanced and that fatigue was creeping back up. "Now, please turn off the light and let's get some shut-eye before the alarm goes off…"

"But what if she asks where babies come from though?" Eddie continued in a slight panic that forced him to pop back awake with a heavy sigh as she was still unwilling to pack it in for the night. "We could scar her for life if we screw this up, Reagan… you know how Kaylin is. It took me almost a year to get her to call me mommy," she shuddered as she recalled the circumstances behind that gem the night the little girl's biological father, Jared Quinlan, had come into this very house to take their sweetness and so many other things away from them. "I thought I was gonna be Eddie bear until I was old and gray."

"Oh, c'mon… this has to be easier," Jamie assured as he had thoroughly researched recommended approaches for weeks now and he had every confidence that his little adopted daughter would adapt. "She's had a tough time with changes in the past, but this is new and happy news… we've done all the research and prep work. She loves school and being around other kids. She's confident with new adults and doesn't hide under the furniture too much anymore when she's insecure. You're starting to sound like Ms. Adams when she tried to take her from me."

"I know she's come so far, but we still don't know how she'll react. I've been reading some of those websites you sent me the links to… they say that the first two years are the attachment phase where a baby learns the world is a warm, secure place. She didn't have that with Jayne and those creeps that were around her plus she remembers everything… maybe that's why she latched onto you so hard when you saved her from the car… you were the only person she felt safe with and she barely let go of you those first few months. Now she's the center of our universe and it still makes her upset whenever anything big changes with us."

"They also say a sibling can help your older child understand what it means to wait and to share, and give him a sense of becoming an independent person," he argued. "And that it will also reinforce that no matter what happens, we are still here to support, nurture, and love her."

"What if having to share and see what this baby has that she doesn't makes her sad? I was thinking about those ultrasound pictures and how excited I was to start the baby's book… Kaylin doesn't even have an album like that," Eddie added as she teared up before the hormonal roller coaster of misgivings and the occasional bout of weepy mood swings hit her at full force and she got a bit overemotional. "Nothing before she was two and you gave her cupcakes on her birthday and snapped a couple of shots on your phone, and I wasn't even there! Jamie, no matter what we do she can't ever get that back!"

"Oh Ed, we're never going to get to sleep tonight are we?" Jamie moaned as his wife started to sob next to him and he pulled her in close. "I never even thought about that. Maybe Adele has a few pictures of her from before that since she's her godmother. We'll try to make that right if we can, okay? Now I'm guessing I need to get dressed and go out for some double brownie fudge blizzard with sprinkles to stop this, right?"

"Yeah," she cried. "Please? I can't help it! And it's still hot in here!"

"I know," he sighed and rolled out of bed. "I'll crack the window open and be back in twenty."

* * *

 _Okay, that was a bit of plot housekeeping as we set everyone up for that upcoming trip to Washington, although that will be where this story takes a decided turn from the events in "Resurrection," and Mason Malevsky might just threaten a little earlier closer to home this time around. A few more chapters to come before Kaylin finds out about the big baby news the night before her daddy leaves town._

 _Up next though, a flash forward to the present to see how our hero is coping with things up on that hillside, and ooh, how he hates the cold… remember that? We've sort of covered things (pun intended) about making one's bed so it's time for a bit more SEAL insight. Then back in time once more as we say goodbye to a kinder, gentler Mommazilla, at least for a bit as she leaves to settle her affairs in Rochester. Don't worry though, Eva Janko will return to her full glory shortly when she's needed to step in for her family._


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

 _March 14, 12:15 am_

 _One. One agonizingly slow, painful, lonely hour had slipped by and Jamie's left arm dropped back to the ground in exhaustion after another beleaguered look at his watch confirmed that fact._

 _One eighth… one hundred and twenty-five thousandths of a whole with seven more hours to go until the sun came up somewhere over the ridge behind him, although he wasn't sure exactly what relief that might bring. Surely not much in the way of physical warmth, but he needed something… some kind of concrete goal to focus on_ _to take_ _his mind off other things and right now it was the only way he knew to keep himself alive through this dark night alone although he continued to pray for those sirens to return… for a sign that his brother was awake and dragging half the NYPD back here with him to help in typical Danny Reagan fashion. The longer that road stayed silent the worse it looked for the whole family, but that wasn't what he should be thinking of right now... Quince would never approve… that personal guide to surviving anything had no room in it for negativity he'd say. Commander Rigsby had his golden rules and Quincy called his tips… Q-tips as they were Jamie had once laughed, and by God, they had already seen him through so much, but this… this was a test beyond anything they had tried to prepare him for… or was it? Surely if those two were here right now they would find a way..._

" _Chunk it, man," Quincy had advised after the shock had settled in that first day when they'd finally met in person and he had been too weak to so much as sit up by himself. "Whenever anything seems impossible, don't look at the end; break it up. Only think about the task you're doing at that moment. Right now the way you look, finishing that pudding on your tray would be a major victory, dude."_

 _Maybe then this wasn't about making it through to the first light or beyond; that was too far off. This was about focusing on something else besides the pain and panic to survive for another hour when the full moon should be at about the point of that pine tree he guessed as he had watched its slow relentless trek across the nighttime sky. So no more looking at the watch until it got to there he promised as he restarted the dynamic rewarming drill he'd been painstakingly taught and picked up his arm once more and continued to contract his muscles methodically one at a time but in rapid fashion… fast enough to generate heat, but not so fast that he'd start to sweat and create deadly moisture. His concentrated efforts went from the tips of his fingers all the way down his left side to his toes and then the same for his right until he got to the hip, no need to go any further than that… whatever was below was swollen and unresponsive once more and would probably serve him best if it would only go numb or drop off… God it would be so much better now if it was already gone like that doc in DC had advised, he'd be able to move and crawl out of here then before it became impossible, but now even the slightest movement caused searing pain to radiate that could not be ignored. It was tough though to keep yourself warm lying here on the frozen ground on a night like this... if shock set in it would be impossible so maybe that wasn't such a good thing to hope for either. At least he had lucked out on what he was wearing. Cotton doesn't wick and would kill, he remembered. Thank goodness for_ _xtreme_ _fleece sweatpants and a wool sweater under that ultra techy lightweight insanely expensive_ _primaloft_ _jacket that Eddie had bought him for Christmas knowing how much her husband hated the cold right now._

 _Chalk one up for Ed; he'd already probably be a goner without her._

 _Which brought him to Q-tip number five, or was it six? It wasn't necessary to stay in order, was it? He hoped not. This was the_ _one his_ _newfound friend had uttered that first day when they shared a room and Eddie had finally been allowed to visit again. "Damn, Reagan," Quince had said as he spotted her out in the hall talking to Doc Kenzie. "She's yours, right? You remember when you're in a tough spot and it takes a hundred and fifty percent of all you've got to keep going, you gotta focus on something to motivate you to live. If I had someone like that waiting for me at home, I'd come back from the dead too."_

" _I'd give anything to be back in that bed with you right now, Eddie," Jamie rasped in a desperate, non-existent voice that had been stripped away by the cold, smoke and more than an hour of off-tune singing. "I want to lay down and snuggle with the window open and have our midnight talks again and see Kaylin tonight… I'm gonna be there when our new baby girl is born too. I won't leave… I'll do whatever it takes… I promise… just please, somebody… figure this out soon. I need help," he trailed off with a moan as he allowed himself to slip back into self pity for just a moment. "I can't do this alone."_

" _NO ONE'S EXPECTING YOU TO DO THIS BY YOURSELF, REAGAN!" Commander Rigsby's voice echoed through his mind and Jamie jumped as if the man had been standing next to him while he backtracked in thought and reviewed the circumstances that had brought him to this place. Rigs had a tone and authority that rivaled his own father's which was really no surprise given his occupation. "That's one of the first things we teach newbies… we throw seven of 'em out at a time in a little rubber boat in the surf zone off San Diego in the winter and tell them to paddle down the coast against eight to 10 foot waves._ _Six stroke_ _and one coxswain directs. If one guy screws up the boat turns and gets tossed back on the beach. You fail. Like the Admiral said, you can't change the world alone. You have to accept help, and_ _to truly get_ _from your starting point to your destination takes friends, colleagues, the goodwill of strangers and a strong person to guide them._ "

 **SEAL Rule 2: If you want to change the world, find someone to help you paddle.**

* * *

"You're looking quite tired this morning," Eva frowned as her son-in-law joined her downstairs in the kitchen early the following day. "I take it you were up late with Edit," she insinuated with a tone to let him know there was precious little privacy in his own home right now.

"Yes, well… your daughter was chatty and hungry last night so I had to go out," Jamie answered as he sought to derail Eva's thought train on any possible romantic activity next door to her room upstairs since there had been none. Once he had returned from the distant grocery store thoroughly chilled to the bone again with the required pint of Avery's Down East New England-style Chocolate Double Fudge Brownie Blizzard… the last one on their shelf for which he had rejoiced after digging past the other favors... he had fallen sound asleep with his head buried under his pillow before his wife scraped the bottom with the spoon he had handed over with the frozen treat. To prove his point he set the empty container on the counter and tossed the dirty utensil in the sink. "She got worried about how Kaylin will react to the baby news."

"Indeed," Eva replied as she eyed the familiar refuse. "Edit has always comforted herself that way. It has to be that particular brand as well… we first had it during one vacation up in Nantucket when she was eight and her father spoiled her with it since then. Her contention that she is craving it because of being with child is false. It is a familiar excuse; you should not make such efforts to encourage her."

"Well, that's Eddie," Jamie smirked as he pulled a large travel mug out of the cabinet and prepared to fill it with coffee for the road even as he grabbed a few ibuprofen tablets for his sore muscles after the exertion of the day before. "I'm kind used to her particular food requirements, plus I owe her some pampering, considering. She never makes it easy on me, but if I didn't go I'd never hear the end of it. At least she's gotten over the aversion to meat because listening to her whine at dinner while we were having steak and she had to eat salad was something to behold."

"So, Jamison… this meeting you are attending in Washington, what is the purpose?" Eva interrupted as she moved on to something new while continuing to bustle around the kitchen, making copious notes as they came to her on a now lengthy to-do list on a pad on the counter even as she started the coffee and prepared a small plate of fruit and yogurt for her own breakfast. Eva Janko was a master at multitasking and it was easy to see why she was considered an asset in her job. "Are you looking for funding?"

"From the Feds?" Jamie laughed with a little surprise at his mother-in-law's interest. Frankly he had been more startled to find her out of her room and downstairs by herself given Bear's previous determination to pin her down in the bedroom every morning, but one look at the big cat now cowering up on top of the refrigerator told him that the tuna had indeed hit the ceiling fan in some fashion and a hurried ceasefire had been proffered. "No, this program is under the NYPD purview and to some extent the FDNY, but there's not much funding needed. It's more of a volunteer think tank approach Dad allowed me to set up after we had some bad outcomes with a few EDPs on the job… emotionally disturbed people," he explained in normal-speak. "I hooked up with a friend from the fire department that has some military experience and this part of it kind of snowballed from there once he got on board. He has a real gift for understanding the mindset of soldiers when they return home so we've just tried to put into place some common sense protocols to follow when patrol officers or firefighters come upon them in trouble. We can't save them all but the successful suicide rate for military persons has dropped across the board for these encounters in the city this year. We've been asked to present our work to the House Armed Services Committee so that maybe it can be a step in the right direction nationally… I'm just hoping in some small way to help change the world a little I guess. It's not easy on the men and women who serve and come back, or on their families either."

"I understand. My father was Serbian and was drafted into the Yugoslavian army when I was young," she revealed. "Under law twelve months of military service was compulsory, but he was gone much longer than that. Before he left, he was a wonderful man, but he was not such a nice person when he returned so I cannot imagine what…" she trailed off with a long pause as she considered her childhood growing up in an area of such political unrest with a father that had taken to drinking to forget about it. "I had no wish to see him again once I moved here," she admitted. "My mother was Hungarian... their marriage was considered mixed and so it was difficult to begin with, but even with that she would not dream of leaving him to come with me. It was their way. They did not have an easy life, and though she did not approve of Armin, she would not have understood my current situation."

"Eddie has never really has spoken about her grandparents," Jamie replied with a bit of a raised eyebrow at that sliver of personal information his mother-in-law had offered which divulged so much as he had often wondered about her early years but never had the guts to ask. It had always saddened him that Eddie did not have a connection with her past like he did with Henry and Grandma Betty, and to a lesser extent with his mother Mary's parents who had passed of ailments when he was rather young so he had very little memory of them.

"She did not know them, and neither shall I again," Eva explained with a tight-lipped smile as she closed the box tightly once more. "That is in the past and very far away, but I hope in my own time to do better for mine. Perhaps with this move closer I can. I was not always a help to Edit before and with her father… well, she'll have nothing from him now either."

"We're all happy to have you coming back to the city," Jamie offered even as he marveled at the words coming out of his own mouth considering the tensions of the past year. "Kaylin loves spending time with you and Eddie's very excited you will be part of the new baby's life."

"Indeed," Eva agreed. "That was a surprise and not what I was thinking when I came, but it made my decision easier. I do not wish it to be the same for my unokák as it was for her."

"You don't wish the same for your grandchildren as what for me?" Eddie asked curiously from the steps as she joined them downstairs, dressed and ready to grab a quick bite for breakfast before heading off to the 12th for her tour as well.

"Your passion for this terrible flavor of ice cream," Eva deflected with a challenging glance towards Jamie that let him know in no uncertain terms that their previous conversation was to remain private. "It cannot be healthy for the bébiétel," she offered with a shake of the empty carton on the counter as a small bump of feet and quick patter across the ceiling indicated Kaylin was up and ready to start the day as well.

"Oh, Mom… a little ice cream's not gonna hurt anything, and next week we'll get to see exactly how healthy everything is at my appointment," she replied confidently. "I feel so much better now that all that nasty afternoon sickness is starting to die down, just like to books said it would. Didn't you have to send Dad out at night for anything when you were having me?"

"No, never… that's nonsense," Eva tutted as she took her fruit over to the breakfast bar to eat and continue her writing as Kaylin came hurriedly down the steps to join them.

"Daddy! Bear's not on my bed!" she cried in a panic as her normally ever-present four-footed overnight bodyguard was AWOL. "Where he?!"

"Right here, baby," Jamie assured as he scooped her up and held her up to see the defeated cat with the blinking green iridescent eyes and furiously twitching tail as he sulked all the way back against the wall above the refrigerator. "I think maybe he's just hungry and looking for his breakfast. Why don't you go get his bowl and fill it up with dry food?" he asked as he wondered just what have might gone down between their strong-willed pet and equally inclined mother-in-law that morning. Some things were probably better left unknown, he reasoned with a wry smile since the two had come to some kind of truce.

"Can he have fishies, too?" the little girl asked as she squirmed down.

"May he… and yes, I think maybe he would like some of those this morning. Later tonight we have to take care of his box downstairs, right? He's your kitty so you have to help Mommy and Daddy with him every day now too, okay? Make sure he has fresh water to drink. You're getting to be so big, Kaylin Elizabeth."

"'Kay, c'mon boy!" she agreed amenably and went off on her task to feed her feline friend in the pantry as Bear bounded down obediently to follow her while casting a flippant eye over towards Eva while he strolled by with a deliberate swagger that displayed in no uncertain terms he still considered himself king in his own house. "Morning, Nagyanya!" Kaylin chattered happily with a pause for a kiss and a hug on the way past her grandmother.

"See," Jamie elbowed Eddie as they watched. "She's happy to have more responsibility and she can help me with that now since you're not supposed to be around the litter box while you're knocked up," he chuckled quietly. "Kaylin makes her bed and feeds Bear most of the time now. She's ready for the next step," he replied confidently. "She'll love being a big sister and helping with the baby once she sees how important that makes her feel… probably be a little mother hen just like Erin was. You don't have to worry about it and I'll talk to Renzulli today to see if they have anything at home that can help us out with that other part about the book, okay?"

"Whatever you say, Dad," Eddie replied shaking her head at her husband who had been methodically grooming their daughter for this announcement for over a month now. "You suppose that's how your parents laid it out for Danny when the rest of you came along? 'Cause I think he went a little overboard with that whole over responsibility thing."

"Danny is Danny," Jamie sighed as he kissed her forehead. "Once he gets something in his head and he's in that mode, he doesn't let up. I gotta get going, okay? Roll call's in an hour and I need to get set. I'll be late tonight… got that meeting with Rick at 1PP after work to finalize our materials. You want me to bring anything home? Dwyer's isn't getting a new shipment of Avery's ice cream until Monday at the earliest. I checked. Don't exactly have time to swing by their factory in Connecticut to stock up either," he chided with a smirk.

"Nope, just you will do," she replied with a smile and a stretch on her tiptoes to give him a full kiss on the lips. "Mom and I were planning to meet at Andre's on the East Side for real Hungarian chicken paprikash for supper since she's leaving for home tomorrow. Supposed to be the best in the five boroughs and as good as what you can get in Budapest. Wanna come?"

"Think I'll pass and stick with a Cobb salad tonight, lambchop. Hot paprika and Irish men don't always necessarily get along. Make it a girls night out. I promised Rick I would pick up dinner so we could eat in there since he's coming off shift too. You enjoy and good luck getting sweetness to try it."

"You don't know what you're missing, Jamison," Eva advised as she looked over her reading glasses.

"Whatever, Reagan," Eddie conceded with just a nudge of disappointment. "We can't all be hooked on bunny fare. Henry made me promise to bring some home for him to try. Guess he's more evolved than you. More for me and munchie then. Love you."

"Copy that. Stay safe out there Edit Katalin."

* * *

 _Next up, a long chapter as Eddie contends with a sergeant bent on making life difficult for her and the other women at the 12th as she looks to transition to her desired modified duty assignment while Jamie bumps into a bothered and reflective Commissioner Reagan at 1PP before meeting up with our favorite rescue man Rick Fellows as he enters the storyline for the first time during this installment._


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

"Hey, girlfriend," Eddie greeted Kara Walsh when she entered the ladies' changing room prior to roll call before collapsing down on the bench in front of her locker. "You look upset, what's the matter?" she questioned her best work buddy with concern.

"Did you see next week's posted duty assignments?" Kara asked irritably as she opened her door only to slam it shut in an effort to vent. "I'm supposed to be on first since Matt is flying to Atlanta for a trade show… that's the only way I can work around Brandon with the sitter, but Dexter just switched me to midnights," she moaned. "I put in a request over a month ago. I swear he does that out of spite… he only changes the women's schedules at the last minute and makes them as inconvenient as possible. He's got seniority over Wilson too, so it's not like I can go to him for help."

"Jamie's gone on his trip to Washington that week, or I'd offer to switch with you," Eddie commiserated. "I finally have two whole weeks of days in a row after working almost all third shifts the past six weeks. I'll be happy to get back on a regular schedule, although pretty soon it will be all days for me chained to a desk," she griped as she considered her upcoming switch to modified duty which was looking more and more like it would be at 1PP since her efforts to connect with Detective Rivera up in the squad had not been fruitful yet.

"Well I guess you didn't look at the sheet either," Kara informed her. "You're back to third that week too."

"What?!" Eddie railed. "Oh crap! That means Kaylin will have to sleep over at her Grandpa's house now. I'll have to schlep Bear back and forth too since she still won't stay there overnight without him and he goes in the travel kennel better for Jamie than me. This was so much easier when we were at the apartment and Mrs. Henderson was available to sit almost any time. He didn't switch the days off, did he? I have my ultrasound appointment on Tuesday and I'm not missing that even if he gives me a three-day rip!" she vowed.

"No, at least he didn't mess with those," Kara informed. "C'mon Reagan, can't you do anything about this guy? Maybe bend the Commissioner's ear at one of those famous Sunday dinners or have your husband do it? Dexter's been getting away with this crap for years. I mean it's no secret he hates women cops, especially ones with kids, but he makes sure the guys get a shift off if they come up with last minute tickets to a Yankee's game. It's just blatant discrimination!" she asserted.

"Kara, you know I can't do that," Eddie admitted with a sigh. "Jamie's dad is really into things going through the chain of command... I mean look at how long he let his own son go without a promotion so it didn't look like there was any favoritism. He'd just tell me I'd have to take it up the line to Lieutenant Billings and he and Dexter seem to be buddies, that's how he ended up transferred here after he got kicked out of the 2-9… too bad Renzulli got moved to the 3-5. That would have made it easier," she frowned. "I can't rock the boat right now. I've got one card to play with Rivera before he gets scared off because of my new last name too. No one will come on board as my rabbi after that, and if I screw up, I'll never make detective and be riding patrol until I'm old and gray," she lamented.

"I hear you," Kara agreed. "But I can't put up with this too much longer; Matt gets angry because we have to spend so much extra for childcare, and we can't rely on our parents for help since they don't live close by. If it keeps up, I'm gonna have to request a transfer to a new house… that's probably why Dexter does this… he drives as many of the tenured women officers out as he can, and then they get replaced with rookies who don't have kids and can't make a squeak while they're on probation."

"Oh no, please don't leave!" Eddie begged as she looked at her friend. "With Jamie and Renzulli gone and only getting to ride with Wilson off and on, the 12th just isn't the same anymore. I don't want to lose you too! I can't go to Jamie either; he'll just get mad and he has so much on his mind already, it's not fair to put this on him and I don't want him to get in any trouble. This sucks," she trailed off. "Just promise me you won't do anything for the next couple of weeks," she pleaded. "I might know someone who can help and keep our names out of it. I'll see if maybe there isn't another way, and if I can't get in upstairs at the squad and you still want to go, I guess I'll give in and move to 1PP myself," she added after promising herself a covert talk with Henry to see if there was maybe a backdoor retired commissioner dark arts sort of way to circumvent everyone else while seeing Dexter off to some other post.

###

"Don't they ever let you go home?" came a familiar voice and question from the doorway that lifted Frank's frowning stoney countenance up from the paperwork he was intently studying. Ever since before he was born really, his youngest son always had the knack of showing up out of the blue at just the right time to lift his father's spirits whenever it was most needed... like tonight.

"Hey," Frank answered with a smile as he stood up to greet Jamie in front of his desk. "What are you doing here? Is everything all right with Eddie? You look tired and a little stiff there, son. I thought I'm the one that's supposed to be getting old."

"Why is everyone saying that?" Jamie asked with a tinge of annoyance as it had been a frequently approached and ironically sore subject all day since his co-workers had delighted in pointing that out, especially Annabel who had interrogated him about his run training along with the rest of her so-called marathon volunteers as this little team bonding activity had turned highly competitive within the platoon and there was a good amount of friendly wagering involved over the results. "Pushed myself a little too hard yesterday taking a long run and then spent the rest of the afternoon on the roof putting up decorations, plus made a late night ice cream craving run to Dwyer's... and Ed is fine besides that," he explained as he walked into his father's office with a couple of bags of takeout from a favored cafe across the street. "She and Kaylin are out with her mom tonight at some Hungarian restaurant. I'm just here meeting Rick for a final look through of our presentation materials in one of the conference rooms downstairs. He's running a little late, and I saw your light was on when I went to pick up some food. Want some? I've got a huge salad I can split, and for the record you look kinda beat too. What are you doing here so late on a Saturday night?" he asked as he turned the tables on his father.

"Just catching up on some paperwork," Frank deflected as returned to his chair and flipped close the personnel files he had been reviewing… previous applicants for the DCPI's position which were under serious consideration now considering the unfortunate events of the evening. "Your grandfather has assured me there's turkey stew waiting in the crock-pot at home… some new recipe he read about."

"Well, good luck with that," Jamie smirked as he considered Henry's enduring search for the perfect answer to Thanksgiving leftovers since for some reason the annual bird continued to get bigger each year. "Hopefully it's better than the turkey-porcini tetrazzini he tried last year… that stuff sat there like a brick, but hiding out from Gramps doesn't explain why you're sitting up here alone so late on the weekend."

Frank smiled tightly at his perceptive child. "Family business then," he admitted as he rocked back in his chair. "Yours, unfortunately," he added and pushed a few loose papers forward before explaining as Jamie's face fell at that revelation. "I was going to stop by the house on the way home and talk to you later, but I guess you saved me a trip. Hope you've got room in that scrapbook of yours. Saul Rivers at the Daily News sent me a press proof of a story they're running tomorrow on page one in the features section," he revealed as Jamie's eyes dropped down to see a photo of himself and Rick in their respective uniforms conferring at the scene of an auto accident several months earlier. "The mayor's office released details of your trip to DC… framed it as a whole NYPD-FDNY collaboration bringing the city attention from Washington while he takes a victory lap for his focus on veterans affairs, mental health and at the same time quashes the bill introduced by Councilman Andrews last year to create a new independent oversight department. I had no idea what they were planning," he admitted to his media-shy son.

"Under Poole's close supervision," Jamie quoted out loud as he quickly scanned the page. "The Mayor's Office of Veteran Affairs (MOVA) touted the program which has shown remarkable success without the need for additional funding, and he is gratified to see a national spotlight focused on these very real issues as all agencies under his command have been directed to better serve New York City's estimated 225,000 veterans. When queried on whether an independent agency could be more effective, Poole said he is not in favor of such a move, and that he pledges to the taxpayers, to the veterans, to the families in New York, to make the best use of current resources... says we're in the midst of doing that right now with strategic priorities of ending veteran homelessness, focusing on mental and behavioral health and developing employment opportunities… Terrific," he moaned as his eyes snapped back up. "He's using our volunteer initiative and guidelines as a springboard to keep all of this under his thumb and not allocate any more money where it's needed."

"Welcome to the world of politics, son," Frank admitted as he pursed his lips. "The art of taking credit for other's work and using it to spin your own advantage. You can't let this put you off though, your efforts through this committee are having a real impact," he warned as he saw the frustration level mount in Jamie's eyes.

"At what cost?" he sighed angrily as he tossed the papers back down on his father's desk in disgust. "I figured Poole might get in for a few photo ops, but I never anticipated this… and of course the fact that I'm the Commissioner's son only pulls you into it too, and makes it seem like you back him."

"That's the art," Frank reiterated with a twitch of his mustache and a nod as he pushed his glasses back. "The dark art of it."

"And there's no way we could have known this was coming and somehow got out ahead of it? I mean Rick and I were never interviewed… there's not one direct quote from either of us in there… maybe we could have mitigated some of this."

"Jamie, we got blindsided," his father admitted. "But it's not on you. This office dropped the ball… my DCPI should have been on top of it through his sources at City Hall even though I'm sure the mayor was keeping it close to the vest because he knew how I would react. I called Garrett in before and read him the riot act," Frank admitted as he recalled the earlier contentious confrontation that afternoon with his advisor… the second such meeting in this very office in the past two days alone. "He admitted he never reached out to see what Poole was vetting with his staff on this issue… it's his job to know, but he's been off his game more so lately and I've been letting this situation with him go on for too long now so this is my fault too… I'm sorry that you've gotten caught up in this mess, but Poole would have used anything. He never intended on letting this independent department see the light of day… that would take away his control over it. Your program and this round table invitation just happened to tick all of his boxes at the right time, but that doesn't change the fact that you and Rick and the rest of your committee are making great strides in improving conditions for EDPs across the city."

"But it will change the way all the veterans' groups who were pushing for that department see us," Jamie argued. "They'll think we somehow set them up and we won't get their cooperation anymore. That's been a big reason behind why this part of it has been working… we've been able to use them to educate the families on what resources are already available before some of these soldiers get to the crisis point. This really sucks," he railed. "Just when I thought we were getting somewhere, and wait until Danny gets wind of it… I'll never hear the end of it. He hates that I'm involved in any of this in the first place and never fails to point out that I just don't get it. Now he can accuse me of making things worse."

"Confucius said ' _Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall,'"_ Frank offered. "This is one battle lost, Jamie… there will be others. Keep fighting the good fight," he advised as his son's phone buzzed. "I'm proud of what you're doing."

"Rick's here," Jamie sighed as he glanced down and read the text. "I gotta go. Guess we'll have a lot more to talk about tonight than I thought."

###

"Well, if it isn't Sergeant Pay-it-Forward-Peace-Love-and-Happiness," Rick Fellows smirked with a familiar dig when Jamie walked into the otherwise empty conference room on the second floor where the FDNY rescue man was setting up his laptop to sync with the room's AV equipment. "Damn, Reagan… you're supposed to look completely exhausted _after_ the baby comes," he chided. "You're moving worse than me in this cold weather and I've got all kinds of plates and pins holding these old body parts together. What? Did you dive under another collapsing building to arrest a jaywalker today? I didn't get the call to pull your ass out of somewhere again so I'm guessing not," he kidded.

"Oh, for crying out loud I do not look that bad," Jamie griped as he held himself up straighter. "Annabel's marathon training," he explained in as few words as possible while he set their dinner down on the table and started pulling it out while he went with the small-talk approach before informing Rick about the circumstances he'd learned about up in his father's office. He was still disappointed in himself for not seeing something like this coming and wondered how the former-Marine would react to the news about the independent veterans department being shot down. There was no doubt in his mind that something like this would set Danny off and while Rick was far more controlled, Jamie had seen the intensely focused man brew with a heavy anger whenever his fellow soldiers were threatened. The week before he was due to stand up in front of a House committee in Washington filled to the rim with candy-striped brass was not the best time to piss him off. "Besides you smell worse than a smokehouse," he continued. "I'm surprised the sprinklers aren't going off in here, G-r-a-n-d-p-a," he drawled out and baited his friend deliberately with a forced wry smile. "How was the trip to Houston for the holiday?"

"Oh, had a great time," Rick acknowledged as he reached for his drink and pulled some napkins over. "Played nice with the ex and got to sit down for a real Thanksgiving dinner with my daughter plus that little boy Derek of hers… handsome kid, I gotta tell you... a real spitting image of me," he admitted with pride as he flipped his phone out to show Jamie some pictures of his new grandson. "Almost ten months old… already walking and talking. I missed so much of that being off on deployment when Jenny was growing up… feels good to have a second chance to see some of it now again while I'm still a young buck at 45," he proclaimed with a grin. "Weather was better too," he admitted. "Not so many aches and pains to worry about down there. I'm thinking of heading south and living the good life when the doc stamps my papers retired next time I fail the annual physical. There's nothing much else holding me up here except for the job. Won't be too much longer at this rate either," he admitted with a small shake of his head and rub of a stiff shoulder. "Got one coming up in a few weeks when I hit another birthday and the boys have even odds on me back at the house."

"Somehow I don't see you being the type to sit around a pool in a Hawaiian shirt somewhere sipping drinks with little umbrellas in them," Jamie smiled. "You'll stay and train a whole new generation of hotshot rescue medics in the fire academy."

"Yeah, well if your daddy keeps it in his head that it's a good idea to let you break in more rookies, I might just have to do that… you flatfoots are gonna need all of us you can get. I'm betting I'll be pulling' that redheaded probie of yours out of something by the time her training wheels come off."

"God, I hope not," Jamie said, shaking his head as the thought of his current partner ending up in a bad way like that was almost as unnerving as worrying about Eddie. Annabel was very competent but always overenthusiastic, and he more often than not had to pull her back rather than send her forward. "She's as gung-ho as they come though," he acknowledged with a nod as he started picking at his salad and paused to take a drink of his favorite flavored diet tea.

"Must be the hair," Rick reasoned as he opened his sandwich wrap and took a seat. "I'm telling 'ya she reminds me of this combat surgeon I knew back when. One of the few women Naval docs ever to go in with special ops units… that one never knew how to hold back either. Charlotte MacKenzie was her name," he reminisced with a far-off look. "Gave all us corpsmen a run for our money and something to dream about at night. Five-foot even, a hundred and nothin' pounds, auburn locks always pulled back in a tight ponytail... what a firecracker."

"Sounds like she was right up your alley," Jamie smirked as he continued to avoid addressing the news about Mayor Poole's article. "You have a thing for her?"

"Nah," Rick admitted. "Too old and married at the time… I was a few years short of my twenty and she was even up… just came out of her trauma and vascular residencies… a board-certified kick ass surgeon. If she couldn't put you back together, someone hadn't scraped enough of you off the ground. I stayed true to the vows I made to Ellen every day that we were together… not that I mightn't have been tempted with this one, but there's this little thing called a no-fraternization rule, so having extra-marital affairs with colleagues has you looking at career-threatening disciplinary action pretty quick, you know loverboy... why you kept your seat in the car with that blond of yours for three years. Kenzie never gave me the time of day anyway… always too focused on the job… speaking of which…" he queried before looking at Jamie with a frown. "Now what's with all this chit-chat tonight? Thought we were going to grab a bite, run through the PowerPoint and call it a day. I don't know about you, but I took the redeye back from Texas last night and worked a ten-hour shift right after so I'm beat and you look like hell to start with. What gives?"

"Just talked to my dad while I was waiting for you," Jamie admitted with a regretful sigh as he looked over. "The mayor…"

"Oh, Christ," Rick moaned. "Don't tell me he's gonna be holding our hands through this. I'm not standing in that room in Washington and singing kumbaya with the man. He just funded the additional EMS training programs we asked for and then turned around and closed four firehouses in the city."

"Yeah, well... he's been busy," Jamie admitted as he pulled a copy of the press draft out of his messenger bag and pushed it across the table. "Looks like we've been working for his reelection campaign all this time."

"Son of a…" Rick trailed off as he read the article before laying it back down on the table. "Bastard... knows just how to spin things. He's got stone-cold heavy ones," he huffed as he turned back to his meal.

"Wait, that's it?" Jamie puzzled as he sat back, surprised at the accepted tone the last statement was offered in. "I thought that would be good for a bigger rant. He screwed us over with all the veterans' groups we were working with," he prodded with more anger at the situation than his former military partner was offering.

"Nah, not really," Rick advised before explaining. "Harvard, you got naïve, idealistic ivy-league ideas about the way these things like this always go. Vets get used to the fact that they're promised the stars when they enlist and then get the crap handed to them the second the ink is dry on the form. No one really expected that department to go forward. It's just a nice-sounding pretty present with a big red bow the politicians haul out to make themselves look patriotic while our guys get put on waiting lists that are months long for basic health procedures or worse… the ones with something serious are weeded out by making 'em wait until it's too late to do anything about it. Dead is cheaper for the system. It's all about the money… who gets it and who doesn't. You'll see that when we're in Washington surrounded by every Tom, Dick and Harry looking to pull funding out of the great American war chest while a kid that's willing to sign up and put his life on the line for his country… to go get shot up overseas somewhere or worse… well he's a write off that doesn't even get a bandaid because he's not in the right voting block. Same as your cop friends or my smoke eaters if they're disabled on the job; no one really gives a damn about them after they've been used up."

"But I do!" Jamie insisted as he took a little offense at being told once more that he had no idea how things really were. "This isn't right!"

"I know that," Rick offered with a small smile at his good-hearted yet well-connected buddy. "You're the exception to the rule. Tell me one thing though… when you asked me to step on this committee, was it your idea to get into the politics of all this and hang out with the bigwigs in Washington, or were you just looking to help one kid that was in trouble at a time?"

"No," Jamie admitted as he sat back and considered the goals he had started out with just a year ago. "I only wanted to make things better here on the street… to stop some of these EDPs from walking off bridges or putting guns in their mouths because no one knew what to say to them in that moment or how to treat them once they were talked down and in the system so it didn't happen again. Had a twenty-year-old kid nosedive off the Williamsburg last week," he admitted as he thought back to the young man that had taken his life despite the best efforts of some of his patrol officers that night before Thanksgiving when he and Annabel had been too late to arrive. "Newly diagnosed schizophrenic just back from college and on new meds. Parents thought he had turned the corner… seemed to have a handle on it so they left him alone for a few hours to go out with friends and he heard voices again. Rossi said and did everything right… he just couldn't get through to him fast enough. We're still not there… I want to work on this."

"Good, 'cause I didn't sign up for any of that other stuff. Besides, I already had to go out and get a new suit… a freaking suit, damn it, Reagan, since there was no way in hell I'd be caught dead asking for permission to wear my dress uniform down there… and I needed one that doesn't smell like smoke from being stuffed in the back of my closet with the rest of my clothing, so you owe me for this one," he chided as he powered up the presentation and photos of some of the dozens of men and women that had been saved by their program that year started to fall into a mosaic pattern that soon covered the big screen. "These are the reasons I agreed to work with the hippie child of the Police Commissioner in his own damn big blue house," Rick reiterated as the pair sat back and reviewed the graphics which showed their simplistic, common sense unfunded approach was working… not in every case... there were still some bad outcomes as would be expected, but for many of the faces up there the battle had been won in no small part due to a dedicated group of volunteers who did in fact give a damn.

* * *

 _So Rick was once again successful at talking Jamie down off the ledge, so to speak, but I wouldn't be counting on the same reaction from a particularly irate older brother who makes his thoughts known immediately about the mayor's article plus another related development at the following day's Sunday dinner. Next up is two-part coverage of that event since it ran far too long for one chapter as Jamie will be facing brotherly angst and opposition from multiple fronts when a slight disagreement sparks between the lovebirds while Eddie struggles with the events of the day and her own issues on top of just plain not feeling well. And he thought having his mother-in-law share the same zip code would be his biggest problem of the weekend!_


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

"Well, if it isn't the Hollywood star and Mr. Badass NYPD Sergeant Jamison H. Reagan himself," Danny seethed as he started in on his brother the second Jamie and Eddie entered the house for a very late Sunday dinner following their respective shifts as his had been extended due to an incident within the confines of the 3-5 that afternoon. "Not only are you single-handedly responsible for giving Mayor Poole the ammunition to keep the veterans' services in the dark ages so he can fund his other pet projects, but now you're giving rips to their kids when they're willing to risk their lives to get the job done! On behalf of all my fellow New York City vets, I'd like personally to thank you!"

"Can it, Danny," Jamie bristled as he ignored the expected barbs. "Marcus got that rip from Wilson because he ignored the plan of a more experienced officer who was first on scene. He's been prone to that ever since you stuck him in the 12th as a rookie… you asked me to mentor him back then and I told you he had a reckless streak… you knew he was a liability, and today it sent two of my officers to the hospital! Like I said not everybody's cut out to be a cop!"

"And he's had more than a year on the job now since then where he has been a good cop, you just can't admit you were wrong about him before!"

"Hey, your mother was always kind of partial to the plaster staying on the ceilings in this house, how about we keep things civil out here?" Frank advised as he quickly made his way into the living room and deliberately stood between his two sons with a tumbler of scotch in his hand before they could take it further.

"Whatever, it's not like my opinion on anything _ever_ matters to him," Jamie acquiesced to his father with a huff and turned carefully to help Eddie off with her coat, his concern redirected towards his wife who had not been feeling well all day long now, but had insisted on finishing her tour at work and coming over for the late family dinner, anyway. She was still clutching their bowl of promised arugula and fig salad which had been hastily prepared by her husband at oh dark hundred that morning before he left to drop Kaylin here to spend the day with her Grandpas and saw Eva off in a taxi to the airport to catch her early morning flight back to Rochester. Those added forays were followed by an eventful shift which had seen not one, but two of his officers sent to the ER with what turned out thankfully to be minor shrapnel injuries after a botched robbery and shooting at a local bodega. It had taken hours to sort out the mess at the scene which had also involved Danny's self-declared pseudo-nephew, the aforementioned Marcus Beal as one half of the responding unit from the neighboring 12th precinct.

With all that, Jamie had been left frazzled by the end of his tour and not at all prepared for the ensuing battle with his brother. "You sure you're okay, Ed?" he fretted as he continued pointedly to ignore Danny. "Maybe you should lay down on the couch for a while and rest. I can bring you a tray so you can eat in here."

"And like I told you a hundred times now... I'm _fine,_ Mrs. Worrywart!" Eddie replied tightly and then sought to ease the concerned looks on the ring of Reagan faces that had gathered in the living room and were now encircling her. "It's just heartburn," she assured everyone. "The spicy Hungarian chicken paprikash I had with Mom last night was mm-hmm yummy yum but the fig has other ideas about it and is leading a hostile revolt," she kidded although her attempt at humor appeared to fall flat, particularly with her married half.

"Maybe if my wife would realize that just because she _can_ eat or do something doesn't mean it's necessarily a good idea, considering…" Jamie trailed off in frustration as up to this point he had been more than willing to concede on the late-night ice cream cravings and be patient with regards to Eddie's decision about when it was time to come off the street, but being up half the night due to her discomfort and then hearing the 10-13 call come out while thinking his wife was on duty near that sector had pushed him to the edge in both regards and a definite tension had flared between them when he arrived home.

"Well, maybe my husband needs to understand that I'm a better judge of how I feel at this point… _considering,"_ Eddie replied back icily and let venom hang on that last word.

"Good luck with that," Danny snorted, unwilling to give up or back off even under his father's direction. "We both know how he can be."

"Oh, how can I be?" Jamie fumed back as he looked between them.

"Yeah, you know, Mr. Know-it-All. Like you wrote the Patrol Guide and the How-to-be-Pregnant book yourself," his brother spat back.

"Whatever, Danny. There's a reason for rules and guidelines… keeps people alive and _healthy,"_ he added with a pointed and disappointed look back at his wife who had seemingly defected to the other side and abandoned him. Like his focus at work, Jamie had definite ideas about what was proper for his unborn child, and now that Eddie's available menu options had expanded once more as the afternoon sickness slowly subsided it had become a small bone of contention between the two of them. He was seeking to increase her veggie intake to ensure the fig was well-nourished for every stage of development while she desired to make up for some of what had been missing out of her regular diet in the last six weeks, namely bacon double cheeseburgers, and now after a worried, restless night with neither of them able to sleep well for concern over the baby and other things she was objecting to the sense that he was getting ready to put his foot down on both the diet and modified duty aspects.

"Yeah, you know what doesn't keep guys alive? Hesitating," Danny continued on his own tirade which saw Jamie caught in the middle between two offensives. "Weighing the options when there's only one option. To act. From what I heard your guys were getting nowhere trying to talk it out with the perp and he was just about to take the clerk down before Marcus intentionally drew his fire."

"You believe what you want, Danny. You know, you're part of his problem. Your example's made him reckless. He's gonna get somebody killed… and that could have been my guys today!"

"For your information, his father, Corporal Jimmy Beal, saved my life in Iraq by being 'reckless' like that," Danny angrily pointed out as he waved a finger at his brother's face for emphasis. "If he had hesitated like you're trying to teach his son I'd be in a box in the ground right now instead of him! I owe him everything! Don't forget Marcus and his mother had to scrape by after that because they got no support… not from the government or any so-called do-gooders like you. Maybe you should wrap that big ivy-league brain of yours around that! It was a huge mistake to think you could teach him anything because you'll never understand what something like that means! Being cautious and by-the-book all the time gets people killed too! Pretty soon no one is going to want to back up a unit out of the 3-5!"

"Alright now everyone, TRUCE!" Frank barked with authority this time since his previous attempts to quell the argument had gone unheeded. "Eddie," he redirected. "Is there anything I can get for you?"

"Oh no, please... I just need some more Tums and for this one to take a chill pill," she added while motioning towards Jamie and attempting to keep an even temper with balanced emotions after her own trying day… on one hand knowing their own disagreement had not played out all the way yet especially since he was tense from dealing with the added scrutiny from the mayor's article which would impact his both his upcoming trip and dealings with his brother. At the same time she also felt relieved he had not been directly involved in the incident at the 3-5 even as her own frustrations at work had grown with some snide comments offered at her expense by Sergeant Dexter while they shared the front desk space for the afternoon.

"Well, maybe I can help with that," Frank offered as he quickly cut in once more in an attempt to mediate some peace and handed his stressed youngest son the tumbler with two fingers of scotch. "Figured you might need this by now after I heard about the call you had," he added with a contentious look towards Danny who was thusly warned to lay off the rhetoric until his brother's mood could be tempered and everyone assured that Eddie was made comfortable. "First, are the two officers okay?"

"It turned out to be minor, thank God… _this time,"_ Jamie emphasized although he likewise finally backed down on his father's order and gratefully accepted the drink. "They spotted the guy with a gun on the clerk after walking into the store to get some coffee… stayed concealed, called it in and then got him talking. Marcus went in despite being ordered to stay outside and the perp fired a wild shot at him that ricocheted off the shelving. Adams and Mitchell were both hit in the face and neck with some metal fragments, but they're fine and already discharged… superficial, looked worse than it was… didn't even need many stitches. Can't say the same for the perp… when he wasn't looking the store owner came out of the back room and took him down with one swing of a baseball bat he had behind the counter. Still touch and go at Lenox Hill with a skull fracture but the DA's not looking to file any charges against the owner. It's all on tape from the security camera. Clear case of self defense," he shrugged.

"And one less trigger-happy skel on the street with no public outcry for police brutality," Henry acknowledged with a tip of his own glass after listening to the account with interest before he turned to move off into the dining room. "So it all worked out in the end. Here's to Louisville Sluggers. Now c'mon, we've been waiting forever for those chops. I'm starving; let's eat."

"Yeah, it worked out except a _good_ cop has a black mark on his record now," Danny muttered just loud enough to be heard as he turned and followed his grandfather out.

"And there's that," Jamie sighed at his brother's continued stance against him as he took another sip. "I'll never be anything to him no matter what I do," he added under his breath before being nearly bowled over by an enthusiastic little girl who ignored the rest of the family's angst and skipped into the room before latching onto his knees.

"Daddy! Mommy!" Kaylin cried as she excitedly took both their hands and tugged on them. "Come see, COME SEE! P'EASE! Pop Pop and Grandpa and me made a Christmas tree after we went to church today! It's so pretty with big lights and it SPARKLES!" she gushed.

"So that's how they kept you busy all afternoon, hmm sweetness?" he asked while putting the glass down on a shelf and scooping her up for a snuggle and a kiss as his father looked on and considered that trait Jamie had for showing up at just the right time… perhaps one could say the same for his granddaughter since from appearances it looked like both his son and daughter-in-law had taken hits on all fronts that day.

"She was a big help; we couldn't have got it all done without her," Frank advised with a smile as he continued to try to smooth things over between the ruffled newlyweds. "Picked the perfect one out of the lot and managed to keep Pop in line the whole time we were decorating it too. You know how ridiculously fussy he is over where every little ornament is placed. I put them up, and he spends the next week rearranging them."

"I heard that, Francis," came the irreverent reply from the dining room. "You always clump the tinsel too."

"As opposed to taking hours and putting it up strand by strand," Frank sighed.

"Takes time to do it right," Henry insisted.

"When we have mine?" Kaylin asked as she ignored the subtle strife between her grandparents and her parents dutifully went together despite their current aversive state to admire her efforts which had turned out rather nicely after all although the bottom of the tree was conspicuously heavily laden with items to about the three-foot preschooler height level and Jamie had no doubt his grandfather would stealthily redistribute everything before the holiday arrived.

"Oh, that _is_ pretty, sweetness. You did such a good job. I guess we do need to get a tree of our own, don't we?" he considered as it was their first year in the new home and out of the space-constricted apartment… plus there was an eager little girl to please who certainly needed to have the opportunity to wake up early and sneak down the stairs to peek at what Santa had brought.

"Well, of course we do... honestly, bah humbug there much, Reagan?" Eddie tutted with unmasked annoyance as she had been looking forward to that aspect of the holiday since the minute they moved the previous summer and she spotted some remaining prizes downstairs. "Mrs. Peterson left piles of decorations for us to use in that horde that's still in the basement. That's one thing of hers we did keep. Now all we have to do is have Daddy haul them upstairs and let baby girl here pick out another tree and have at it. She's obviously a real pro now."

"Tonight?" Kaylin bounced in Jamie's arms as her blue eyes flashed with excitement. "Can we, p'ease?!"

"May we," Jamie and Eddie reminded in unison. "Not tonight, baby, it's too late to start," Jamie continued. "But I'll make sure to get those boxes sorted and ready for you. We'll pick out a tree of our very own sometime this week before I leave for my trip, okay? I promise."

"'Kay! Let me go, p'ease… I 'ungry," was the surprising response as the little girl was appeased with her father's reply and squirmed down to run away and join everyone in the dining room.

"Gee, well we must be running late because _that_ almost never happens. She really worked up an appetite today, and if I didn't know better, I'd say there was a strong family resemblance developing, Janko," Jamie noted as he watched her go. "Except Kaylin was smart enough to turn down the hot stuff and eat something sensible last night," he sniped once more without any subtlety, although he immediately regretted saying that when his wife's frustration level surged as did her volume.

"Oh, will you give it a rest, already? You're right... you're right... YOU'RE RIGHT! There, I said it!" Eddie griped as she made a beeline back to the couch to plop down uncomfortably as she put her hand over her stomach which had been turning off and on since late last evening. "Wilson lectured me today too when I had to come off patrol and work the desk and now he's pressuring me to make it permanent. I know… I overdid it, and now I'm paying. Your Irish spawn hates Hungarian food. Can't we just let it go at that? The punishment fits the crime, doesn't it?"

"Are you two coming in here or can we start without you? Bless us O Lord, and these thy gifts and all of that," came Danny's annoyed urging from the other room.

"GO!" Eddie ordered irritably as she sat back to put her feet up and pulled a pillow over her tummy. "Don't make everyone else wait longer. They should have just started without us in the first place. I'll get some toast out in the kitchen later. Just go, please and help Kaylin. I'll be _fine,"_ she assured once more.

"FINE!" Jamie snapped back in defeat with a heavy sigh even as his brother's forceful " _AMEN!"_ resonated through clearly from across the house indicating that the rest of the family had started to eat. "Maybe we can talk later when we're both ready to have a real conversation," he added softly before moving off to let her brood alone.

* * *

 _Poor Jamie's not going to find that things are any friendlier at the table at this point as discussion centers around his upcoming trip and Linda reveals the fact that she's having a few medical procedures done while still concealing the real reasons behind them. In the meantime, Eddie will converse with a concerned gruff retired commissioner while trying to downplay her own situation at work and need for upcoming child care help. After all that we'll discover that maybe there might be some hidden consequences behind the fact that article was published in the Sunday paper… ones that the Reagan family would have never dreamed of in their worst nightmares as a certain plaid-dressed man with cold gray eyes sits up and takes notice._

 _Next, we start a nice run of long chapters as our evil villain inserts himself a little more boldly into the storyline this time around. Please don't forget to review as the happy little ding that comes from my inbox when I receive one keeps me writing and I'm in the middle of some heavy chapters right now far down the road from here. :)  
_


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

"Everything okay with the lovebirds?" Henry prodded with concern as his youngest grandson walked in the room alone and he handed over the meat platter. "Here, I made sure the vultures over there left you with something," he indicated with a nod to the right side of the table where Danny and the boys were eagerly woofing down the food from their plates after the late start had left them all famished. "Wasn't easy, almost lost an arm," he quipped in an attempt to cool the resident tempers.

"Yeah, she's just resting. I'll make her some toast and tea in a bit," Jamie acknowledged with a sigh of regret as he accepted the food. "Sorry about all that... it's just been one of those days for both of us," he added sheepishly as he glanced up the table at Erin, Nicki and Linda who had wisely stayed out of the fray.

"Not to worry," Frank advised as he was relieved to see at least one of the parties starting to tone things down although he was not naïve enough to believe that his oldest would continue to hold his tongue and opinion for very much longer.

"Uncle Jamie, this salad is really good," Nicki offered in small talk, likewise trying to ease the strain between her uncles. "I don't think I've ever had fresh figs before. What's up for next week?" she wondered.

"Oh, um, limes," Jamie replied distractedly as he busily filled his plate, having just realized he had worked through his meal break without stopping and promising to make an apology to Annabel who had not complained once to her preoccupied TO. "If Ed could drink right now I'm guessing she'd want margaritas, but maybe we'll go with dessert and try key lime pie instead."

"Personally, I'd skip the limes and salt to go straight for the tequila today," Henry offered as it was apparent to everyone that Danny was in no mood to move on yet, clearly evident by the loud scraping noises currently emanating from the knife and fork on his plate as he attacked his food with vigor.

"Ha, now that's funny. I just read an interesting story about a four-hundred-year-old lime tree that grows in a Hungarian village… it was named the European Tree of the Year with over eleven thousand votes," Linda added in her own attempt to cut the tension on the room which failed on that account except to have everyone at the table stop what they were doing and raise their puzzled eyebrows at her.

"Come again?" Frank questioned with a puzzled shake of his head.

"It was on my daily trivia app," she explained. "Legend has it that many years ago, after a devastating forest fire, the tree gave the seeds to revive the forest and now protects it and the family that owns the land. It's still a tradition for them to introduce the young members of their family to it. I was going to ask Eva if she had ever heard about that, but I forgot she was leaving early today."

"Well, you'll have to bring that up when she comes back next month," Jamie revealed before taking a bite of his food. "She's putting her house in Rochester on the market and taking the job in the city here starting January first."

"And you're okay with that?" Erin asked with as she looked down the way with surprise at her younger brother's apparent acceptance of that move.

"Of course he is," Danny sniped when he could no longer contain himself. "Mr. Ivy-League-Peace-Love-and-Happiness can handle anything."

"Sure," Jamie deflected with another audible sigh at the continued juvenile name calling without returning his sister's glance or further inciting his brother, still really quite honestly unsure of how he felt about Eva's move, but considering the hostility emanating from his own family... what was the difference? Plus his mother-in-law had shown true inroads over this past visit and his wife was happy. "Eddie wants her mom to be here more often for her and Kaylin, and we'll need some more help with the… um, fig anyway," he trailed off as he helped the little girl by cutting some of her food and considered his upcoming trip. "Speaking of which, Ed's supposed to work days next week while I'm gone, but in case anything comes up I was wondering if she could count on you guys to watch Kaylin."

"You're leaving Wednesday morning?" Erin questioned. "I can do Thursday night if she needs help."

"Me too" Nicki piped in.

"I can sleep over at the house Wednesday to make it easier if I have to," Henry offered. "It'll be lonely here with Francis gone anyway, but I've got a poker game with the old crew from the 2-1 Thursday. Hate to miss that… one of the few times we get together when it's not at someone's funeral."

"Gramps!" Nicki chided. "Don't talk like that!"

"Linda, are you open for Friday?" Jamie asked to cover his bases, unaware that Eddie already knew she would be in definite need of help and had planned to ask Henry on the down low to keep Dexter's determined interference from her husband. "I mean she shouldn't really need it, but…"

"No, um… sorry, can't," Linda replied with regret, not having intended to reveal the fact that she was taking the day off for her scheduled procedures, but she knew somehow it would get back to the family now and appear as if she was hiding something if she didn't come clean. "I'm actually having a checkup with my neurosurgeon that afternoon and he might run a few tests. Danny's taking the day off to be with me and the boys are staying over until Saturday with my friend Ginny."

"Anything serious?" Erin asked with obvious concern as she looked over at her sister-in-law with equal surprise.

"Oh, no… just some routine stuff because it's been a while," Linda assured with a half-truth. "My back's been feeling good lately. We just wanted to make sure everything is stable." An admission that had Frank offer a sad, knowing look towards his son and oldest daughter-in-law. So that was the reason behind their current problems, just when they had apparently put the devastating effects of the hospital shooting behind them.

"Okay, well… worse case, if she has to bang in, it'll just have to be," Jamie conceded as he took that excuse on its merit at first although he wondered once more what was going on between the older couple that had seen them push away so much since his wife had become... _pregnant._ That small surprising revelation clicked a light bulb on in his brain and the truth was confirmed as a quick shocked glance at his brother was met for just the briefest second before Danny uncharacteristically looked away as he realized he and Linda had been made. "I wish she could have taken off, so we didn't have to worry about it, but scheduling has been all over the place at the 12th lately," he finished on autopilot while contemplating that development, unsure how to interpret or address it.

"Really," Frank mused as he caught his youngest son's double take and sought to refocus the conversation on a topic concerning his department before the rest of the family was brought into the know considering Danny's wish that this be kept private. "That new desk sergeant who transferred in from the 2-9 was supposed to take charge of that."

"Oh, he took charge," Jamie admitted as he followed his father's lead with a promise to pursue this later with his brother at a point in time things had been toned down between them. "But I'm not sure too many people are happy about it. If you want to know, you'll need to ask Ed… she hasn't said much about him, just the chatter I heard from around the other guys… seems like he has different rules for men and women."

"Sounds like someone should look into that, Francis," Henry advised as he pursed his lips at the thought of his newest granddaughter-in-law possibly being treated unfairly. "I heard from Drake at the 2-9 they wouldn't have him anymore. Eddie doesn't need to deal with something like that while she's carrying my great-grandbaby."

"Chain of command," Frank replied like clockwork as he did to any similar type of situation. "Lieutenant Billings can capably handle things on his own," he assured. "If I need to hear about it... I will."

"Maybe I should go and check on her," Jamie interjected as he pushed his half-eaten plate back; feeling increasingly guilty about their minor spat now and contemplating the possibility that his wife had been dealing with added complications at work which were behind her indecision about accepting her modified duty position. _Why had everything become so complicated in this family lately?_ he wondered.

"You sit and eat, I'll go," Henry ordered before he stood up and made his way out into the kitchen, determined to get the truth of this matter since he had his own inkling that Eddie was likely downplaying the situation with Jamie and firm in the knowledge that his own son would not pursue it on principle.

"Yeah, kid, let Pops take care of it… at least he knows what he's doing," Danny baited. "Maybe you should take him along to Washington, too…. you've got no business there unless it's as a lawyer for the ACLU."

"Knock it off already!" Frank gruffed as he himself was still irritated by the situation with the article and his DCPI's failure to be out in front of it… the last thing he wanted was to be continuously reminded of that. "This is still Sunday dinner. Not a free-for-all. Let's keep it civil."

"Such a jerk," Erin muttered as she sought to defend her youngest brother in spite of her father's direction. "Somebody steps up and tries to do the right thing and all you do is complain that they're not doing it your way. Why don't you volunteer some of your time to Jamie's committee?"

"Wasn't asked," Danny replied flatly with a deliberate roll of his eyes.

"And you obviously has a problem with that," Jamie sighed. "Even though we could never talk about it before because I couldn't possibly understand where you were coming from. So I give up… wave the white flag…. I apologize for disappointing you by listening to mom and paying attention in class so I could get into a good school instead of enlisting after 911 like you did because I don't know… maybe I was fourteen at the time. I'm sorry I brought Rick in on this and he has different ideas than you do… ones that seem to be working and that he actually thinks I have _something_ to offer the veterans we're trying to help. I'm sorry we don't agree about how I run _my_ platoon in _my_ precinct since you sure as... heck," he deferred with tightly pursed lips and an even tone with a nod to the young, sensitive-to-conflict ears next to him, "wouldn't like it if I told you how to run your cases. I don't know what else to say to you about this anymore. Can we please just move on?"

"I think that's a very good idea at this point," Frank agreed as the tone in his voice made it clear to everyone this time the answer was final. "I've heard enough. Now someone, please pass the potatoes."

Meanwhile back in the living room, Eddie had been following the conversation in bits and pieces, but had missed the part from the mention of Dexter forward as she had been prompted to make yet another run to the upstairs bathroom for some antacids. She returned to find Henry coming out from the kitchen with a small plate of the promised toast and a steaming cup of tea.

"Now sit back down and put your feet up," he ordered. "My Betty swore by this ginger tea when she wasn't feeling well, and I used sweet cinnamon butter on the bread… you're favorite, right?"

"Oh, Pop, you're so good to me," Eddie smiled as she did as she was told and accepted the plate once settled. "You shouldn't worry though, I'm fine... I told you."

"Things sounded a little heated there between you and Jamie, and for the record I'm allowed to worry… it's what old men do best," Henry tutted as he took a seat in the opposite arm chair.

"Oh, that… was nothing," Eddie sighed as she gratefully sipped the tea. "He's just stressing over things and I didn't help by eating the wrong stuff and keeping us both up half the night."

"And so you think it's a good idea to keep other things from him so he doesn't add to those worry lines on his forehead. I'll let you in on a little secret…. he came out of the womb with those," he chuckled. "Plus he's always been a picky bugger about food; drove his mother crazy when he was young. You won't win there either."

"How did you know?" Eddie sighed, remembering that it was impossible to keep anything from this family.

"I wasn't sure until now," Henry frowned. "Old detective's trick.. ask a question like you already know the answer and another to deflect. Now out with it young lady," he growled softly. "You can tell me. What's going on with you?"

"Just that," Eddie admitted sadly. "I want to learn how to do it… face off with perps in the box to solve cases. Before I got married and pregnant, I was in touch with my rabbi Detective Rivera. Ever since I had to switch shifts around and this new desk sergeant came in… I've hardly seen him. It's like Dexter purposefully schedules me around when Rivera is there and he's really nasty to the working mom's," she revealed. "Switches our shifts around at the last minute and stuff. Kara's thinking about requesting a transfer to another house because her husband is so upset. Jamie doesn't know yet, but I got changed to nights again next week while he's gone. I don't want him involved though… I have to prove to the brass at the 12th that I can stand on my own and not rely on him… or anyone else," she emphasized with knowing and pointed raised eyebrows at the Reagan patriarch. "I've gotta do this by myself. I want to pull my modified duty upstairs in the squad so I can work on my gold shield, but Dexter told Wilson he won't let that happen… he says that just because I got pregnant and have a new last name now I shouldn't get any special perks…. used those exact words this afternoon when I was stuck working with him," she frowned as Henry's temper bubbled under the surface and he vowed to look into this. "He said if I want to stay at the 12th he's gonna put me at the front desk answering phones the whole time I'm out because it's 'where I belong, anyway.'" she embellished with air quotes. "If I lose Rivera, I'm done. It'll be like Jamie… no matter how well I do my job no one will ever recommend me for a promotion. I may as well just transfer to Personnel permanently," she added in defeat. "And after today I'm gonna have to do it soon. Wilson said he won't put me on patrol much longer and Jamie's been really patient, but he's wound up now. I promised him the latest I'd be out there would be Christmas, but it doesn't look like I'll make that."

"Now, don't sound like that," Henry chided. "Reagans aren't quitters. We'll figure this out," he assured as he sat back and contemplated what had been said. "Seems like the root of your problems comes from this Sergeant Dexter standing in your way. He's the one that got transferred in from the 2-9, right? If enough of you ladies go up the chain to Lieutenant Billings together he could squash this nonsense."

"Billings and Dexter are friends," Eddie revealed. "That's why we think he came to the 12th. None of the other women are willing to step up further because of that and I don't want it to look like I'm making waves since I'm a Reagan now. Please, Pop," she begged. "Just let it go for now. Maybe after what happened today Jamie is right… it's not the smartest thing for both of us to be on the street when we're responsible for two children. I love him and this baby and Kaylin more than I ever thought was possible," she added tearfully as she put her hand on her belly. "More than my job for sure. If something would happen to our family because I'm being selfish… I couldn't live with myself."

"Well, now turn off those waterworks," Henry advised gently even as he leaned forward and promised himself a closer look at this Dexter fellow. Although he was many years removed now from being the city's top cop, he still had connections and no one in the department was going to deliberately mess with one of his own if he could help it despite the current commissioner's stance. "None of that is going to happen. Don't forget you've got a family here to back you... and Kaylin and this baby are ours too. Erin and I will help you look after Kaylin while Jamie's away. I can sleep over at your house Wednesday and Friday and Erin said she can take her on Thursday. Don't worry about any of that, but don't keep it from Jamie either; he'll understand better than anyone else the pickle you're in. Being a Reagan has its advantages, but not all of them come on the job, sweetheart."

"Who's calling my wife their sweetheart?" Jamie kidded to lighten the mood as he entered the room and sat next to her on the couch before grabbing her hand.

"See," Henry smiled as he got to his feet. "Remember what I told you," he advised knowingly before giving Eddie a kiss on the cheek and leaving the couple in private.

"I'm sorry, Ed… I know I've been a bear today," Jamie apologized with a heavy sigh. "In spite of what Rick and Dad said yesterday, I let that article thing get to me and I guess I've been dreading this…" he indicated with a nod towards the dining room where his still-irate brother remained. "Plus being awake most of last night and what happened today... I've been up and down lately with stress. It's not even big stuff, well today with the 10-13 was a little, but maybe I'm just trying to do too much. Every time I think I'm past it and can relax, something else comes up. I don't need to heap any more on you though… but it just kills me to see when you're not feeling well and I'm worried about you and the baby."

"And it kills me to see you this way too," Eddie admitted with a small squeeze of her fingers as she accepted his apology and made ready with one of her own. "You take too much on yourself and I know I haven't been helping lately with not making my mind up about work and all," she continued while still vowing to keep the strife with Dexter out from under Jamie's radar for now in spite of Henry's advice. "I've been frustrated and I'm sorry for taking that out on you, but I swear I'll straighten all that out in the next couple of weeks and try to be more sensible about what I can and can't do anymore. Wilson said he's not gonna let me out on the street too much longer anyway and Mom spent all last night at dinner telling me the same thing."

"All right, Edit Katalin, I'll try to let it go as long as you're sure it's okay," he murmured as he leaned over for a kiss. "I do love you, and I'm proud that you're still following your dream for a gold shield," he added and accepted the fact that his independent wife was determined to handle this on her own for now, although he promised to keep a close eye on the situation. "Forgive me?"

"Yes, lambchop, and I love you more," Eddie smirked and settled herself back comfortably against the cushions. "We'll have this all worked out before Christmas. I want the munch _-she_ to be healthy too, and we'll see that at the appointment next week, okay?" she emphasized with a grin as she teased him after placing his hand on her tummy. "And then we get to tell Kaylin and it will be so much fun to share that with her, right? I promise, now, I'm really fine," she assured. "Pop's tea even settled my stomach already. I don't know what I'd do without him."

"Neither do I," Jamie admitted. "I'm glad we can count on everyone… well almost," he admitted with a sad nod towards the opposite side of the house where his brother and sister-in-law remained. Just as Eddie was determined to work out the Dexter situation on her own, Jamie likewise resolved to spare his pregnant wife from the real reason for Linda and Danny's recent coldness, at least until he confirmed it for himself… perhaps a talk with his father was in order since it didn't seem like he would be approaching his brother about it anytime soon. "We couldn't do any of this alone."

"You'll fix things with him, Jamie," Eddie assured as she felt badly now he needed to face that alone. "You can talk to him once things cool off just like the two of you always do. Let's just hope that stubborn streak we both inherited skips a generation though, or we'll all be in for it in another few months," she smiled. "How about we focus on the fun stuff coming up this next week or so until then? We get to put up our own Christmas tree with Kaylin and see the munchie again. The rest of it doesn't matter or will work itself out. No matter what happens our family is perfect," she added with a satisfied pat on the belly.

"It sure is now," Jamie agreed and thanked God once more for the presence of his two beloved girls and a certain little fig in his life right now.

###

While the Reagan family was dealing with some dissention within the ranks, a few blocks away and closer to Jamie and Eddie's cherished new house, a man with cold gray eyes was eating supper alone in the kitchen of an old Cape Cod while scanning a featured article in that morning's paper with great interest as he reconsidered his original plan and decided to capitalize on this stroke of fortune. Instead of hitting the Reagans initially as planned here in the city where they owned every advantage, he could arrange do it on his own home turf in Washington. Certain connections there would make it so much easier to cover his tracks and impart the desired revenge for the death of his own son with an elaborate cat-and-mouse strategy he had conceived that was ultimately designed to leave the mighty NYPD Police Commissioner Frank Reagan without either of his two remaining boys… payback came at double the price he reasoned.

Mason Malevsky was grinning as he pulled out his phone to make the first of a few calls to set things in motion. "Get her ready to run," he ordered the familiar younger man on the line. "You're taking a little trip south next week," he advised. "It's finally time to make them pay."

* * *

 _Well, of course readers who are familiar with Malevsky's plan in "Resurrection" know that he used his ties to the FBI to harass Jamie psychologically for some time before the big showdown at the bridge came about. This time though things might turn out a bit differently down there in DC as a storm approaches and a different target may come to the forefront, perhaps one who has Jamie's heart wrapped up in little bows or another that had just dissed his younger brother's abilities in almost all aspects… not for nothing, but they might very well be the ones that he may need to count on in the future. I'm just sayin'..._

 _Before that happens though, Jamie and Eddie will have one more run in with their strange new neighbor as they try to tie up a few loose ends before he leaves on his big trip, plus they need to have that much-anticipated ultrasound appointment to check the development of the little lime by that point, and Kaylin will finally be told she's going to be a big sister a few chapters down the road from here._

 _Sorry if the setup seems a little long, but this is a complicated installment with many characters' storylines to weave together and fit in here! Speaking of long, that's a good way to describe the next chapter too, so consider it another *BONUS* day!_


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

"This one, Daddy! Oh, _may_ we p'ease have this one?!" Kaylin carefully pleaded with wide eyes as her mittened hands tugged on Jamie's while she excitedly directed him to what easily appeared to be the tallest specimen left on the nearby Christmas tree lot the following Saturday afternoon.

"Wow. That's a whole lot of…. timber," Eddie commented as she and her husband stood together and craned their necks to look up at the top of the big Norway spruce with just a few small snowflakes wafting down as winter had settled upon the region rather early once more again this year. "Baby, I'm pretty sure Daddy would have to cut a hole in the roof of our house to make that one fit, and then all of us and Bear would get rained and snowed on. I don't think he would like that…. do you? Maybe we can find one that's a little bit smaller," she encouraged. "Like so high so we can reach the top to put the star on," she demonstrated on tiptoes with up stretched arms.

"'Kay," the little girl acquiesced with a small disappointed frown before moving off down the row to look at more suitable and ceiling-friendly possibilities to keep her four-legged furry friend dry since everyone, including Kaylin Elizabeth Reagan, knew that kitties did not like to get wet, especially Bear most of all.

"Thank you… that was close," Jamie mouthed almost silently as he took Eddie's hand and they followed along behind their daughter as a frigid breeze rustled the lines of open-bulbed lights draping back and forth across the way.

"Anytime… I've always got your back," Eddie assured with a grin. "Well… almost. Trying to carry something like that into the house on your own might break you, and that would be no fun," she added while allowing her hand to drift over and bump him suggestively causing an immediate flinch and blush. "We could open up a few other things under the tree tonight after the little elf goes to bed. I'm gonna miss you next week when you're away."

"Down girl," he smirked before sneaking in a little kiss as he brushed her lips. In spite of the unsettled start to the week during that contentious dinner, the two had a made peace with each other since then and their personal and professional lives had remained on a quieter course, which was a relief to both even though Jamie was still waiting for her to come clean with him over the goings on at the 12th, however, he had a good idea why she was being elusive, having been in the same position where pinning on the nameplate stamped Reagan offered more of a target than advancement opportunities for one's career. He knew her time out on patrol was soon to come to an end one way or another at Wilson's direction, so was reluctantly willing to bide his time and opinion for now since in his mind only three opportunities were presenting themselves, either Eddie stayed with the platoon where she was and worked the front desk, managed to find her way upstairs into the squad, or made a move to 1PP. While he preferred one of the latter two, should his wife chose door number one he was ready to offer his support. As far as expecting the same from his brother, he had passed on that notion and had pointedly been ignoring his older sibling all week, with no intention for an attempt to resolve their differences until after he returned from Washington.

"'Bout this one?" Kaylin questioned as she drew his attention back and stood before a short, skinny Charlie Brown version propped up against a fence and forgotten in the back corner. Jamie swore he could hear the browning needles dropping off of it by the second. "Him sad all by himself," she added with an equally despairing look.

"Oh… sad is a good word for it," Eddie took over once more as she wrinkled up her forehead. "Although maybe fire hazard fits better," she slipped in sideways under her breath. "We can't, Jamison…" she warned, passing the baton to make it his responsibility to say no this time.

"Sweetie, I don't think that one is for sale anymore…. see the tag is cut off," Jamie fibbed with a half-truth as he doubted they would get this one home with any of the branches intact, anyway. "I bet it's already sold and the people are coming back to pick it up. Maybe Grandpa and Pop Pop got the very best tree here with you," he fluffed and continued to try to pacify his little daughter. "We can look somewhere else tomorrow," was the final attempt until brimming tears from those light blue eyes nearly broke his resolve. "How about we go down this row? I don't think we tried over there," he encouraged as the little girl sighed and moved off once more.

"Nice one," Eddie quipped. "Stay strong… thought you were going to break there, Reagan."

"Like you're any better… using Bear against her, for shame, Janko," he chided.

"Next year at this time for Christmas there will be four of us," she reminded with a happy chuff. "I want to go out of the city to a real tree farm and pick out our very own to chop down next time so we can hike up and down hills and have hot chocolate and take a horse-drawn sleigh ride. We'll make a day of it."

"And I can guess which one of us will be chopping, dragging and sporting the baby backpack while we're trudging up and down those hills searching for the perfect tree. Besides in less than three weeks there _will_ be four of us," Jamie reminded with a little frown as he recalled last night's phone conversation with Eva… the one that had Eddie promising her mother she was welcome to stay with them for as long as necessary until she could sell the home in Rochester and find a suitable replacement here in the city while starting her new position at the agency in Park Slope after the first of the year.

"Oh, only for a short time," Eddie defended. "C'mon, what was I supposed to say, no? Mom's already had multiple offers on her house. She won't have any trouble selling it, and once that closes she'll be able to look for her own here. She already gave notice at her job, but she can't afford to have two places at once. Trust me, she likes her things just so, and she moves quick. It'll just be a month or so at the most," she assured with a satisfied nod. "Besides, it will be nice to spend the holidays together again, won't it? Kaylin will love having her Nagyanya around this time."

"If you say so, dear," Jamie accepted with a heavy sigh. While this last visit with Eva had gone well, he wasn't so sure how an extended version would pan out especially since her daughter would be further along in the pregnancy, and he had seen firsthand how the Janko women were likely to go into full-out momma bear mode whenever there was any inkling of a reason.

"Speaking of that, I called and scheduled a visit with daddy for next Sunday morning after you get back from your trip. I know it's a long drive down to Fairton and we might miss dinner if there's traffic coming back, but we both have off. I really want to tell him about the baby and if we wait any longer, it won't be much of a surprise when he sees me," she snickered while tapping her belly to highlight the ever-increasing little pooch. "I'm not gonna be able to hide it from anyone soon."

"Also fine, dear, as long as the weather's good. The ten-day forecast shows a storm might be brewing for the end of next week," he informed while making a mental note to make sure Eddie and the house were prepared in case there was a snow event in his absence. In no way would he allow his wife be out there shoveling so much as two flakes at a time in her condition while he was gone.

"Oh, we'll be okay… there's almost never a big storm this early in the season..." Eddie trailed off in assurance. "Uh oh," she murmured after spotting an impatient little girl standing with her arms crossed with a patented frowny face in front of yet another piney option. "Little lambchop looks pretty serious over there. Let's hope number three is a winner."

Indeed, relief was evident on both her parent's faces when a closer inspection revealed Kaylin's next choice was an almost appropriately sized although very fat and full nine-foot Douglas Fir that would make the perfect addition to their holiday decor in the high ceiling of the living room. With a now-happy child and wife, Jamie gratefully waved over an attendant who helped drag the heavy tree up to the front to be paid for and then carefully secured the wrapped version to the top of Eddie's crossover with some assistance for the short trip home. He was standing in the driveway contemplating the reverse move and how to get their prize safely down and then up the front steps into the house single-handedly when he was startled by a now-familiar voice behind him before spinning around to come nearly face-to-face with the owner. Those eyes… those somehow eerily familiar cold eyes...

"Looks like you might need a hand there," came the voice associated with them as Mason Malevsky stood on the sidewalk dressed in an old flannel plaid coat zipped up against the chill. "Be happy to help."

"Oh, uh… thanks, Mason," Jamie responded, caught off guard by the other man's sudden appearance as Eddie had quickly run Kaylin into the house to use the bathroom and he had been preoccupied with the current dilemma. "Maybe if you could just help me lift it off the car. It's heavy though… I don't want to put you out."

"No problem. Where I come from neighbors and family look out for one another."

"And where is that?" Jamie asked deliberately as he tried to filter out a little information about this odd man who had recently inserted himself into their lives. The accent had a distinctly New York base, but it was no longer pure and he was curious to see if the truth followed since he had an instant distrust building and that sixth sense had not often left him down.

"Oh, all over you could say I guess when it comes down to it," Malevsky replied evasively while successfully tempering his grin and relishing in this unexpected opportunity to dart in and touch the Reagans intimately without their knowledge while gaining intelligence on the house at the same time since he had plans to use it and disrupt their perfect lives soon. "Grew up in the northern part of the state, but moved south for a time. Retired a few years ago and decided to come up here to be closer to my son," he added, trying as hard as he could not to spit out that last word with venom… it was Sonny after all he had moved near… the oldest child of his who was buried in a crowded Brooklyn cemetery down several rows from his mother under a nondescript marker that bore only his initial and last name after he took his own life when cornered in that bar as the Blue Templar's reign ended… an event which had caught the attention of the directors of the FBI and seen his own position and credentials within the famed Behavioral Analysis Unit in Quantico, Virginia terminated without cause leaving him with one less son and no pension to show for a lifetime of work… all due to the Reagans; first that would-be whistleblower Joseph in his attempt to infiltrate the Templar, and then the mighty PC himself who managed to shut the organization down after this second pesky offspring had stubbornly taken on the investigation on his own as a goddamn rookie at the time, nonetheless. But for them the entire Malevsky clan would be set and enjoying a life of riches elsewhere. Instead, he had been left to eek out an existence on his savings and social security while his youngest son Matthew held a low-level guard position with a construction company in Jersey after having been outed in similar fashion from his detective post at the 3-1 following Sonny's demise.

"Oh, that's nice," Jamie commented while referring to Mason's admission about moving closer to family, and he relented to the older man's offer by proceeding to move around the car and undo the multiple straps to release the tree. "There. I'll take the heavier part with the trunk. If you could just lift the top to clear the car… it's new and my wife will kill me if I scratch it," he added in easy small talk, hoping to accomplish the goal and have this stranger moving on before Eddie or Kaylin came back outside, but that was unfortunately not to be as almost immediately evident by the sound of her questioning voice.

"Jamison Reagan, who are you talking to out here?" Eddie demanded as she approached from the other side of the car. "Do you need me to help?" she continued before stopping short in surprise as she came around the front and ran almost directly into Mason while he stood waiting for Jamie to get into position. "Mister… um, Mason," she startled with a jump. "Sorry, I wasn't expecting you to be here," she deflected with a little laugh and a hand over her heart.

"Nice to see you again. Thought your husband here could use some assistance," Malevsky offered with his patented cold smile. While Jamie was occupied with attention from Matthew in Washington, Mason had definite plans for a few occurrences here at home that would be sure to rattle this little blond irritant and that matching sniveling child who had the misfortune of taking the Reagan name themselves. "You don't seem to be in a way to help him," he added with a definite nod towards her belly and an inflection that had both Jamie and Eddie's blood running cold with what felt like a concealed threat to their unborn, although neither dared admit as much to the other in his presence.

"Oh, I'm fine, but thank you," Eddie swallowed, now as eager as her husband to see this peculiar man off on his way.

"Reagan, so you're the PC's youngest," Mason questioned and that strange sense of déja vu washed over Jamie once more even though he was certain he had never met this man in person before… still there was something so uncannily familiar with that face and those words. For once that eidetic memory of his failed as it could not settle on a match or make a connection with similar conversations held long ago with another that had taken his own life before him after having tried first to impart the favor before that with cut brake lines on Joe's beloved '71 Chevelle. Sonny Malevsky and his father shared many similar features, but the age difference and years of distance were enough to mask the connection for now although Mason knew he was treading the line as much as he was enjoying the game. Perhaps it was time to move this along so that he did not lose the opportunity to surveil the inside of the house and search for the best opportunity to breach it. "I recognized you from that picture in the paper the other week. You're one of those fellas going to Washington DC for some kinda meeting," he offered by way of innocent explanation before encouraging a change of topic. "Here, let's get this down now. Ready? One, two, three," he directed and carefully aided Jamie in lifting the bundled tree to clear the side of the car. "I'll help you get it inside," he added quickly before his counterpart had the opportunity to object or put his end down on the driveway and wave him off. "You don't want to scratch the woodwork or the missus won't like it," he added with a nod and grin toward Eddie. "Trust me, my wife would have had my head if I tried to do something like this on my own back when she was alive."

"I'm sorry to hear about your loss," Eddie commented as she reluctantly moved aside and supervised their ascent up the porch steps before stepping up to open the front door where Kaylin was impatiently watching her treasure approach after having been stripped out of her winter wear layers for potty duty and asked to stay inside while her parents dealt with moving the unyielding mass of branches and needles into the entryway and around the corner into the living room. "Was it recent?" Eddie inquired as she protectively put a hand on the little girl and pulled her back behind as the men passed.

"No, Marta passed in childbirth with my second son," he revealed candidly with no apparent consideration for Eddie's current condition. "Left me alone to raise my two boys," he added almost bitterly before a low rumbling growl emanating from the kitchen reminded everyone of another presence in the room as Bear emerged from his lair above the refrigerator and showed his displeasure at the unexpected invader by bouncing down to the breakfast bar counter and rising up to his fullest, fluffiest long-haired hissing arched-back stance with flashing green eyes in a display normally reserved for very few intruders unless it happened to be Danny who had still failed by this point to make a lasting peace with the big cat.

"Oh, damn," Jamie breathed before quickly setting his end down on the carpet and stepping in front of their clearly irate pet before he could launch his patented blitz attack on this guest… welcomed or not he had no desire to see the man knocked down by the nearly twenty-pound muscular animal in their own home. "Stop!" he ordered harshly with a hand up before Bear could initiate his missile-like leap which saw the cat stand down slightly although he continued to offer an ever-increasing angry yowl. "Sorry," he apologized while offering a look back at Mason. "He's usually gentle, but sometimes very protective around strangers."

"As well he should be," Mason offered as he slowly dropped his own load to lay the tree all the way down and step back to add some distance. "I'm sure with your family's reputation in this city you need to be cautious," he indicated with a glancing look around that had already pinpointed the well-concealed but obviously top-notch security system that would likely impede an attempt to breach it outright and thereby foil any plan to break in undetected and leave a few carefully premeditated "gifts" for the family before the holidays. _Unfortunate,_ he thought as he would have liked nothing more than to wring that goddamned cat's neck right here in front of them all, but it did not appear as if that part of his outlined tactics could be carried out without invoking too much risk. Surely there was video surveillance to go along with the alarms and motion detection devices that would capture and reveal his intent too soon. Still, Mason Malevsky was nothing if not resourceful and he vowed to regroup and design something equally distasteful to shake up the wife and kiddo while the husband was away. "About that, I meant to ask if there was a lot of crime in this neighborhood?"

 _That's odd,_ Jamie thought once more. _Who would ask something like that now after buying a house and moving in?_

"Not much," he answered honestly. "Why? Have you had any problems?"

"No reason," Mason laughed. "Now, there's an answer for the ages. I must have picked it up from my son. Be safe," he added once more with a tip of the hat as he moved off towards the door and past Eddie who had remained silent and defensively placed in front of Kaylin during that whole exchange. "Good night, ma'am."

"Thank you for your help, Mason," she stuttered politely as he walked out and immediately closed the door securely behind him, pausing to turn the locks for added measure.

"Why did you do that?" Jamie asked as his eyes narrowed, wondering if his wife had likewise been spooked by the so-called neighborly encounter. "I thought you told me I was being paranoid."

"Let's just say I think that he's someone like Renzulli would say… when you're talking to him, you better have one hand on your wallet. Know what I mean?" she replied. "I don't like that he was in the house," she added with a shiver. "I felt like he was scoping us out. Did you catch the look at the alarm before he asked about the neighborhood? He tried to hide it."

"Yeah," Jamie agreed. "Plus he showed up unannounced right when it looked like I might need some help and practically dragged us up the steps to get a look inside. Now do you mind if I check him out? He knew I was leaving next week too," he added with concern. "Promise me you'll keep everything alarmed and stay away from him while I'm gone."

"I promise, but I'm gonna beat you to that research," Eddie added before thinking. "I'm on nights again starting tomorrow," she revealed regretfully after catching his look, knowing that Jamie's next scheduled shift was the second tour on Monday and to this point she had been unable to get her week of promised days reinstated by Sergeant Dexter.

"Let me get this straight, you're advocating the unauthorized use of a police computer?" he asked with a frown, recalling a time in the not-so-distant past when she had threatened to turn him in for doing much the same thing. "And Ed, why did you wait so long to tell me about the shift change," he added gently. "That new desk sergeant is playing games again… same as he did at the 2-9, isn't he? Why didn't you come to me about it before?"

"Baby, why don't you go look through those boxes Daddy brought upstairs and pick out the colors for the lights and bulbs you want to hang on the tree while we get it ready to put in the stand?" Eddie directed Kaylin as she shooshed her towards the back of the room. "Jamie, I need to handle this myself," she explained in a low whisper. "What he's doing to me is no different than any of the other women at the 12th, and if I have you or anyone else in the family swoop in and say something it looks like I can't handle anything on my own… that definitely won't win me any points with the brass or Detective Rivera, and I need all the ones I can get right now."

"Eddie… I understand that; we all do," Jamie answered as he closed the distance between them and wrapped his arms around her. "Honey, I've been there and I hate that you have to go through it now too, but we have to be honest with each other even through something like this. Just because I can't go in there and punch the guy's lights out like I really want to doesn't mean I can't help or at least be a sounding board for whatever you're facing. Please don't try to hide stuff like this from me. I really will try to respect your wishes and stay out of it… more so than some of the other people in this family," he reminded with raised eyebrows. "Especially one so-called retired commissioner, not to mention any names."

"Oh, no… Pop," she gasped, recalling that conversation which saw her spilling out her problems. "Has he…?"

"Nothing that I know of, but there's no way he'll let anyone bully his newest granddaughter without at least snooping around a bit," Jamie admitted. "Don't worry. Pop's been out of the game for a while but he's still one of the best. He promised not to make any waves or at least not leave a trail," he assured.

"So you talked to him already," Eddie frowned with an accusing tone. "You knew all along."

"Yup," he admitted with a wry smile before turning serious once more as he thought about their visitor. "Well almost… you kind of outed yourself. Now as far as this Mason guy goes… we don't even have a last name to go on."

"Jamie, let me please," Eddie insisted. "I'll look into it tomorrow. I've got some ideas. I promise we'll talk it over again on Monday morning… this is exactly the type of stuff I want to do upstairs in the squad… I can handle it," she replied confidently. "Trust me. You have your sources and I have mine."

"Alright, lambchop," he sighed, reminding himself it was imperative for her confidence that he remain supportive when it was her career that was being affected for the most part now by their marriage and the unexpected sprout. "I just hope the little guy in there is at least half as spunky and good looking as you both are so we men can try to keep up appearances in this household," he whispered once more as a certain blond-headed girl returned to their immediate circle wrapped nearly head to toe in sparkling gold garland with bows and soft string balls hanging from her jumper while wearing an angel topper on her head. "LOOK!" she gushed and twirled around in a happy preschooler dance. "I pretty like a Christmas tree now too!"

"Yes, you sure are, sweetness," Jamie grinned at the sight of his beautiful family before snagging a twig of artificial mistletoe off his daughter's shirt and holding it over Eddie's head while prompting her to return a deepening kiss. "Thank you," he mouthed as he leaned his forehead against hers. "Because of you and her I have just about every gift in my life I could ever hope for."

* * *

 _So it's a hopeful that she's soon-to-be-a-Detective E. Reagan who is on Mason's case at this point although even as he finds himself needing to reconfigure a few ideas, this was a plan that was years in the making and so he has left little to chance otherwise by thoroughly covering his tracks to this point. Will Eddie's search prove fruitful, or will she run into a series of carefully staged dead ends? More on that as she and Jamie share some intimate time and ready themselves for a surprising obligation and what will turn out to be a possible game-changing doctor's appointment._

 _Since I won't be back with another chapter until next week, I want to wish everyone a wonderful holiday season and thank all the readers and reviewers who have made writing these stories over the past few years or so much fun!_


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

"Mason Elias Lockwood," Eddie revealed as promised that following Monday morning while slipping onto the comfortable leather couch next to Jamie as he lay lengthwise nearly mesmerized by the blinking cacophony of dancing coordinated multicolor morphing LED light strings crisscrossing back and forth at random on Kaylin's most precious yet enormous and fully loaded Christmas tree which she had insisted be lit for almost all of her waking moments during the last several days.

"I'm sorry, what?" he replied, unable to break the stare as his OCD tendencies for order were stretched to the near breaking point and he barely noticed that his wife had returned home mid-morning after her midnight shift.

"Lockwood," she repeated with a frown while pushing some errant hair back behind her ear. "His last name is Lockwood. Jamie, you promised to figure out how to slow down the flashing pattern on these fancy-shmancy lights a little every day behind baby girl's back so that eventually our tree isn't seizure-inducing," she chided. "Now c'mon… listen to what I found out!" she demanded as a click on the remote laying on the coffee table turned off the garish glittering display entirely. "Thank goodness she's back in preschool every morning now so that our retinas get a break and don't burn out before that! You did remember to drop her off there, right?"

"Of course I did," he huffed indignantly. "Sister Grace said they were going to be working on their nativity play for church all week. Kaylin got the part of the angel Gabriel with two lines to say all by herself. And Mason Lockwood… I heard you the first time," Jamie responded as he snapped out of his stupor. "Why does that sound so familiar?" he asked as neither he nor Eddie had any idea at that point in time that they had just stepped into Mason's intricate and painstakingly planned web which included fully documented false identities harboring just enough of the true details to make them plausible.

"Well, it's the name of a werewolf character in "The Vampire Diaries" if you're into that show, remember? Mason was killed by Damon Salvatore who ripped his heart out which resulted in instant death in season three and then he came back as a ghost after that I think," Eddie added. "Actually it was the first name of one on that Disney show "Wizards of Waverly Place" too, and something else like that… "Teen Wolf" maybe? Or that was just a friend of one... I don't know. Seems to be popular with fictional werewolves, anyway," she mused.

"So your research has determined we need to arm ourselves with silver bullets from here on out?" Jamie puzzled as he glanced over at her. "Seriously, Ed?"

"No, of course not! I said _fictional!"_ she responded with frustration, the implied "duh" left unstated. "Mason Elias Lockwood was born in 1950 near Binghamton, New York and moved south as a teenager, living in several states including Virginia, South Carolina and Oklahoma over the years since. Married Marta St. Lawrence in 1971 and like he said she died ten years or so later in the beginning of 1982 during the birth of their second son, Matthew. Older son's name is Mykel… very strange spelling so was easy to find, deceased; suicide in 2009. No priors for papa other than a couple of parking tickets on the late 90s. Worked as an accountant for several local businesses and grocery chains throughout the years."

"So he's been telling the truth as far as we know," Jamie mused while chewing the inside of his cheek. "Wait, what about the other kid… the second son? Mason said he moved here to be closer to him."

"He works in Jersey near Branchwood. No idea where he lives though. Must be paid in cash under the table because he hasn't filed income tax forms in the past five years."

"Hmm… so a little sketchy there, but probably doesn't matter. How'd you get the name so fast by the way?" Jamie queried, generally impressed so far with her thoroughness considering she had little time to work on this overnight.

"I called Mom yesterday, and she checked the state property records for recent transfers," she revealed proudly. "I could have done that if I had access to those databases, but I told you… I have sources too."

"Nice work, Detective Reagan," Jamie smirked as he pulled her over on top of his chest while mulling things over in his brain. "Unique names, fairly easy to find and search for," he murmured almost to himself with a sigh as he tried to stop from going any further down the conspiracy nut wing path. "I guess maybe we're looking at another misfire on the Reagan radar like with Mrs. Winkler and the yappy poinsettia chihuahuas," he admitted. "Pretty sad though that our job makes us this suspicious of all of our neighbors. Guess we seem pretty strange to them too with the hours we keep and the fact that a serial killer decided to take us all hostage here last summer before an attack cat took him down," he mused although that nagging sense of recognition and dislike had not dissipated in spite of the fact than nothing Eddie had uncovered seemed remotely familiar or nefarious. "I still don't like the guy. Stay away from him," he warned.

"Noted, Sergeant Reagan," Eddie brimmed with newfound confidence as he accepted her gathered intel without criticism while her hands slipped lower and underneath his shirt. "That was fun, but I think I need some more practice uncovering things while we're alone," she whispered as her soft touch roamed and turned him into instant putty. "Tomorrow we'll be busy with the doctor in the morning, so I might not get too many more chances before you go away."

"Edit Katalin," he moaned as she trailed a line of soft kisses down his chest before sitting up to straddle him and unbutton her own blouse, revealing a burgeoning bustline and increasingly taught bra as the expected physical changes from the pregnancy were beginning to make themselves known and only further enhanced her beauty as far as Jamie was concerned. "I guess maybe we need to do some shopping for you… this one's getting too small," he smiled while tracing his fingers along the pretty lace before reaching up to release the garment and the treasures it contained. "God, you're just gorgeous."

"Well, thank you, sir," she beamed as her blue eyes danced while she felt his heart quicken and she did the same for him by removing his favored sweatpants and boxers. "Likewise my handsome husband. Just remember that you're going to have to share these girls with someone else soon," she reminded before fully settling herself down on him so they could become one and his mouth and hands could caress and excite her to the core.

"Oh, like I said before… this kid's gotta be the best wingman ever," Jamie breathed into her quickening and aggressive movements as her normally healthy sex drive had been further enhanced as of late by surging hormones and he was not about to complain about that either as he let her take the lead. "Poor guy might be spoiled though when he gets older… never find anyone to compare to his beautiful mother…" he trailed off before words were replaced by passionate sounds of love and ecstasy.

Ignorance proved to be bliss as the two shared their last intimate few hours together before events commencing the following morning would see them pulled apart in hearts, bodies and minds for the foreseeable future… perhaps forever.

###

"Everyone back there is staring at me," Jamie muttered as he anxiously loosened the tie to his dress uniform even as he sat ramrod straight and spit-polished in the otherwise empty waiting room of Dr. Geisner's office the following morning, having been summoned against his will directly after this appointment for a last-minute medal ceremony and photo shoot pushed through 1PP and past a reticent Police Commissioner Frank Reagan by the mayor's well-oiled press machine seeking to expand upon the positive public response to the past week's article.

"Well, maybe they remember you from the first time we were here, and you were pacing around the room like an armed caged grizzly bear," Eddie reminded as she nervously flipped through a magazine before letting out a sigh as she glanced at the reception desk since they were the last of a group of several other more obviously pregnant women to be brought in. "I'm sure it definitely left an impression and a big red security alert on my file, but I wish they would call us back already. Don't they know what a bad idea it is to force a pregnant woman to drink a huge amount of water then make them sit here? There's gonna be a flash flood soon if we don't get a move on it, and everyone is going to be staring at _me_ and a huge puddle on the floor," she griped. "Are you sure you don't want me to come with you afterwards? I know there's no way I can fit in my official blues anymore, but I can go as a casual dressy civilian Mrs. Sergeant Jamison Reagan instead of a stuffed-sausage-looking Officer Edit Reagan this time. I know you don't want to hear it because you think it's all about the politics, but you deserve this Commendation for Community Service and I'm so proud of you. If what you've accomplished this year doesn't merit the bar with a blue star for an idea that improved conditions within the city, what does? C'mon, honestly, lambchop, give yourself a little credit once in awhile."

"No, you don't need to be there and get caught up in it somehow. This whole thing is ridiculous... I'm leaving tomorrow and have work to do at the 3-5 so it better not take all day. I can't believe Dad wasn't able to stop it."

"Your Dad serves at the pleasure of the mayor as he constantly reminds us… that means he doesn't always get to call the shots. Would you rather he resign over something like this?"

"No, of course not," Jamie replied with a frustrated huff. "I just really hate the dog and pony show crap… and it will be one more thing to set Danny off," he frowned while imagining a worsening divide with his older brother over this whole issue… a rift he had begun to feel guilty about considering his sister-in-law's revelation about the upcoming neurocheck and that secret the older couple seemed to be keeping. Suddenly he just couldn't keep that bundled up away from Eddie anymore. "Linda's having some tests done at her surgeon's office on Friday," he blurted out to his wife as an explanation, unable to keep quiet any longer especially given what he suspected to be the reason behind it and where they happened to be sitting at that very moment.

"Wait, what?" Eddie gasped as she looked over in puzzled shock. "When did you hear about this? Is something wrong? Why didn't you tell me?"

"It was last week at dinner when you weren't in the room and I was asking about who could watch Kaylin when I was gone if you needed help," he answered. "Linda said it was nothing… just routine stuff, but Danny looked away," he added with concern. "I didn't say anything to you before because I think it might have something to do with this," he indicated a beach ball form in the air over his own stomach. "I wanted to talk to my brother about it first in case I was wrong, but it doesn't look like I'm gonna get the chance, especially after today's news hits the ceiling fan," he added.

"You think she's pregnant too?" Eddie asked with wide doe eyes before the realization behind all this cold secrecy hit her. "Or she wants to be and can't," she reasoned and sadly sat back in the chair to stare straight ahead as the pieces clicked into place. "And I am. Whoa."

"Yeah," he agreed as they contemplated that for several minutes, suddenly unconcerned about his NYPD obligations or being stuck in the waiting room because of the now late-running appointment.

"So that's why… and all this time… then they weren't at dinner this week…" she rattled on as Danny's crew had been absent from the family meal this past weekend, supposedly on a day trip to visit friends. "But you said she's seeing the surgeon, not Dr. Geisner," she reminded.

"The bullet that's still in there has something to do with it I think maybe," he waffled. "Ed, I'm not a hundred percent about any of this. I'm pretty sure Dad knows… I was going to talk to him since Danny and I are at odds, but it's all I could come up with that explains how things have been going between us and them... I didn't want you to hear about it somehow and be upset though while I was gone," he explained.

"I'm not upset because… wait, should I be? I mean no, right? It's not like we planned it or would have done anything on purpose. Wow, I don't even know what to think now," she admitted as conflicting emotions hit from all directions. "I feel really bad," she added after another long pause. "I teased Danny about being a marshmallow and having a little girl of his own because of the way he was with Kaylin… I didn't realize…"

"None of us did… or really do yet," Jamie admitted as he grabbed her hand. "I honestly don't know what to say about it either. I just wanted to make sure you were okay. I'm sorry I did it now while we're here… before your appointment, but it just kind of came out."

"What should I do if I see either of them?" she wondered. "They didn't want anyone to know? But what if they ask about our baby? Although to be honest neither one really has lately… I never thought it was because of this though… I mean I just kind of assumed they were done with the boys being older."

"That's why I didn't say something earlier and I doubt you'll run into either before that… Linda's not here today and he's avoiding me like the plague, but just be yourself, Ed, and try to understand what they are going through I guess. I promise when I get back we'll work this out. If Danny wasn't being such a jerk about this EDP committee thing I would have gone to him about it right away, but he won't talk to me now I'm sure. Maybe they'll hear whatever it is they are hoping for by that point… Linda seemed anxious to have the tests done. If we were in that position… I don't know, right? Something like that is so damn personal..."

"Edit Reagan," came the voice from the doorway that halted their conversation before they could offer any more thought on the subject, and the two got up quietly together this time to follow the nurse back to the exam room hand-in-hand, pausing for the now-familiar weighing and measuring process without comment until they answered the requisite questions and were seated alone once more to await the sonographer's arrival. Eddie was relieved when the nurse directed her to hop up on the table while still wearing her pretty blue-flowered blouse and favorite stretchy-waist black pants that were able to pass as dressy if one didn't look too close. Everyone was anticipating the need for only a simple transabdominal ultrasound this time versus the more uncomfortable internal one performed during that first early visit.

Once more it was their now-favorite friendly and personable sonographer, Christine, who arrived minutes later with a warm smile and quickly set about prepping Eddie for the scan by having her lay back as she warmed the machine and applied a generous amount of gel on her bare tummy before rubbing the transducer wand in it and quickly bringing up that much-anticipated and now distinctly humanoid image on the screen. Jamie and Eddie were again soon enthralled by the sight of their unborn child with tiny legs and arms already moving.

"Oh, there you are!" Eddie cried as her heart filled with joy. "So amazing… I can't believe how much _she's_ changed already in just a few weeks. Jamie, look! Our munchie's waving to us! Hi pretty baby girl!" she gushed and returned the gesture.

" _He_ sure is," her equally happy husband agreed without taking his eyes from the screen… soaking in every second of the incredibly detailed view while holding her hand and keeping their little predict-the-sex game intact. "And handsome like his old man to boot. Way to go kiddo… that's my boy."

"Well, hello to you too, little one," Christine also smiled at the level of activity which was always a positive sign. "As you both probably know we can't reliably determine sex at this point… not until the eighteenth to twentieth week so we're not even going to go down there," she chided.

"Oh, we're just teasing. I keep going back and forth about finding out," Eddie admitted. "This one wants to know, and sometimes I do too, but part of me thinks it's like the greatest Christmas present ever, and I'd hate to spoil the buildup. Can we just keep our options open on that for now?"

"Sure, I'll just mark you as a maybe for sexing with a big old notation to ask first. Now, then... Mommy and Daddy came here all dressed up to have a good look at you today, so let's be cooperative, okay? Eddie, since you are at twelve weeks gestation now, I'm just going to take some baseline measurements which will help assess the baby's risks of having complications such as chromosomal abnormalities like Down Syndrome or major congenital heart problems. We do this first by checking the clear space in the tissue at the back of the baby's neck," she paused for a few moments while she clicked and assessed. "Everything there is well within the normal parameters," she assured as two big, evident sighs signaled relief at that news and the couple offered each other beaming smiles before she checked her notes and continued her work. "And here is the heart itself… everything there appears to be in order as well, and a solid 152 beats per minute is perfect at this stage," she added before switching over to Doppler as the beautiful sound of even, rapid little thuds filled the room.

"I really wish we had one of these at home… I could listen to that and watch this all day," Eddie sighed happily as she relaxed back against the pillows. "Have you ever seen and heard something so beautiful before?"

"Well, I'll be happy to download some more photos and a video on your USB drive to take home when we're done here so you can have your daily fix," the sonographer smiled. "At this stage, believe it or not, all your baby's limbs, organs, bones, and muscles should be fully formed so I'm going to finish things up by taking a quick peek in the abdomen," Christine explained while continuing with the scan for a few more minutes before pausing for another glance back at the folder to read through her previous notes which included a question mark in the paragraph next to her shorthand for the urinary tract. "The intestines, which were previously growing so quickly they protruded into the umbilical cord, are now regressing back into the abdomen and the kidneys are starting to excrete urine into your baby's bladder in case you didn't know."

"Oh, trust me… I've been made fully aware of that," Eddie joked as she continued thoroughly to enjoy her experience. "We've been on top of such things since the minute we found out I was pregnant… down to the fruit or veggie size of the week since this one here is a walking, talking encyclopedia of almost daily pregnancy facts and trivia," she added with a beaming nod towards her husband. "We're at lime size, right?"

"Nothing wrong with being informed, is there Christine?" Jamie questioned with a smirk and a quick kiss on Eddie's cheek as his heart was swelling with pride at the sight of his beautiful wife and second child… pushing aside any other worries that he had in the world for just a few more blissful seconds before the skies opened and everything started to crash down around them.

"Not at all," the tech mused, and after another moment's pause to weigh the options, she decided to follow her very experienced gut as she put down the wand and reached for some towels to clean up the excess gel that remained on her patient's belly. "Eddie, I apologize for the inconvenience, but I'm going to step out and ask you to change into a gown and then switch back to the transvaginal probe for this last little part. Your baby is being a little shy about giving me a good look at the kidneys and bladder and we can usually get much clearer images internally."

"Wait, is there something wrong?" Eddie was startled by that request as her eager smile disappeared in an instant at this unexpected turnaround in fortune and tone while her own heart nearly stopped. With a frightened look at Jamie that was reflected immediately back as the same shock was apparent in his hazel eyes, she quickly propped herself up on her elbows while her grip on his hand tightened considerably. "There is, isn't there? Oh, God.. no! Please, tell us," she begged as her eyes welled up. "What is it?"

* * *

 _Anyone who has been in a similar situation can appreciate the immediate fear that absolutely freezes your heart at a moment like that. Next, we discover exactly what our favorite Jamko couple has to be concerned about that might significantly affect their already beloved little bean's future as an irritated Police Commissioner takes some heat from a member of his own staff and the mayor while growing worried himself when his youngest son uncharacteristically fails to arrive on time for the ceremony._

 _For the full story behind Eddie and Jamie's first visit to confirm the newest little Reagan's presence in this series, plus more details about Linda and Danny's current situation, please see the "Magic Beans" chapters in the Snapshots II collection in my profile._


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

" _Wait, is there something wrong?" Eddie was startled by that request as her eager smile disappeared in an instant at this unexpected turnaround in fortune and tone while her own heart nearly stopped. With a frightened look at Jamie that was reflected immediately back as the same shock was apparent in his hazel eyes, she quickly propped herself up on her elbows while her grip on his hand tightened considerably. "There is, isn't there? Oh, God.. no! Please, tell us," she begged as her eyes welled up. "What is it?"_

"Nothing that's obviously serious," Christine assured as she immediately sought to quell their panic. "Your baby appears to be developing normally in all other aspects, however, there seems to be a small difference in size between the kidneys… one appears slightly distended so it is more noticeable on the scan. I'm going to ask Dr. Geisner to step in and join us, but an abnormality like this is very common; it's called hydronephrosis and occurs as often as once in every 100 pregnancies. Many times it is caused by a minor narrowing of one of the ureters at the junction with the pelvis of the kidney which creates a little dam effect so that pressure builds up. It's something to keep an eye on, but most cases turn out to be mild and require no long-term follow-up. Very rarely a child may need an operation after birth to open the obstruction and improve drainage. Occasionally we see a condition that mimics this called reflux which requires the use of a small dose of antibiotics for a time."

"What else could this be if it's not just... what did you call it… hydronephrosis? You said we need to keep a careful watch," Jamie reasoned as he actively searched for more information and details while Eddie remained quiet in continued shock at the thought that something could be seriously wrong with their child. "That means it might be something worse, right?" he added as the question nearly caught in his throat.

"There's very little chance of that," Christine added. "Let's just take this one step at a time and have the doctor come in so she's able to confer and answer your questions directly."

"The most severe abnormality that can occur is when the kidneys don't develop at all, and we call that agenesis," Dr. Geisner revealed once she was summoned and quickly joined them in the room to very carefully examine Eddie and perform the new scan herself over the course of several minutes. "That's _not_ what we are seeing here at this time," she emphasized as she pointed to the screen to show them. "There are definitely two present in the correct locations here and here, but the issue that concerns us is the fact that the right one appears distended and a bit swollen from a blockage or congenital problem. The kidneys are involved in the production of amniotic fluid as the fetus develops, and if there are no kidneys or they are severely dysfunctional, then the fluid level in the womb will be very low… a condition that is known as oligohydramnios. This is a rare situation usually diagnosed in the second and third trimesters, but if it becomes advanced generally the baby does not survive after birth because the lungs also fail to develop. Right now, Eddie, your levels are measuring just fine since at this point the mother has more influence on that than the baby."

"Does this mean other things could be wrong?" Eddie asked in a small, tearful voice while still reeling from the news. "I mean Christine said we were checking for other abnormalities before and she didn't see any…"

"There are some rare inherited disorders which can present like that initially and prove to be more serious," Dr. Geisner admitted. "But as Christine stated, most of these abnormalities occur as isolated problems, and it is far more likely we are looking at an issue affecting the baby's urinary tract to a much lesser degree only. It is important to appreciate that babies are constantly growing and changing in the womb and after birth so the appearances of the urinary tract may also change on the ultrasound during this time. Most children with hydronephrosis or reflux will improve with time, and very few, if any, will show symptoms so we prefer to wait and watch. This may mean you will have repeated and more frequent tests, but we try to minimize these and generally abdominal ultrasounds will suffice without requiring anything more invasive."

"So how often? I mean when would the next one be?" Jamie asked as the thought of not knowing what was happening in there was frightening to both of them.

"Given the timing… we'll try to get you in before Christmas again so this does not carry through the holidays," she answered. "A few more weeks will give us much more information and a clearer look at things. Christine is my most experienced sonographer," Dr. Geisner assured. "Many others might have missed this altogether at this point because the presentation is so slight... please keep that in mind even though I know this seems upsetting. We're going to keep a very careful watch over you and your baby, Eddie. I promise you both, and if needed you'll be referred to a specialist. Again, I want to emphasize that as long as your baby is growing well in the womb, no other abnormalities have been found and the volume of amniotic fluid is normal then your child's kidneys are not likely to be significantly impaired or damaged. The vast majority of these babies require no surgery either in the womb or after birth."

###

"Jamie, please just go… your phone is going to have a meltdown soon," Eddie sniffed as the device buzzed once more on the coffee table where he had thrown it before gathering her in his arms on the couch for a much-needed extended cry after they returned directly home following the appointment. "They're still expecting you… you're already late."

"Ed, there's no way I'm leaving you… not now, lambchop," he insisted as he brushed her hair gently back and offered a sympathetic kiss on the forehead. "Dad can pin that damn medal on the mayor himself if he wants a picture for the paper so badly and Rick can handle things alone in Washington. You need me here… I don't want to be anywhere else."

"But Dr. Geisner told us that there's nothing that we can do for now except wait for the next scan… that everything else is absolutely fine and to try not to worry…" she trailed off. "We even got our flu shots today just like we were supposed to while we were there to make sure that was covered."

"And how's that working for you… the not worrying part?" he asked softly with a small shake of his head as he flatly refused to hear it. "No, Eddie. I already banged in with Renzulli. He didn't expect me to get away from 1PP on time either so he had my shift covered in case. I'm staying."

"Kaylin's going to be home soon from preschool though," she reminded as she pushed herself up off his shoulder and wiped her tears before playing with the frayed edge of one of the throw pillows she had been clutching in her lap. "Mrs. Garner said she would take the girls out to lunch for Megan's birthday and drop her off on the way past. I don't want her to know anything is wrong. She gets to find out that she's a big sister tonight," she reminded with a strangled sob, still stubbornly clinging to their original plan as she glanced at the new ultrasound pictures with the outline of a cute little button-nosed face laying on the table. "We have a book to start."

"Honey… maybe it's better if we wait now, don't you think?" Jamie reasoned as he tried to come to grips with things himself. "At least until after next time so we make sure…"

"That our baby is going to be fine?" she demanded as she glanced at him with a hurt look and covered her belly with both hands. "No, I have to believe that now," she admitted as she sat back and closed her eyes to allow another set of fresh tears to roll down her cheeks. "Our munchie is already part of this family… no matter what happens... this is our child. Just like you have faith that what Dr. Remig says about Kaylin's size doesn't mean something's not right and she's not healthy… it's just because she's a little small. Of all the things that could be wrong, Dr. Geisner and Christine said they would pick this because the odds are it will never affect the baby and if it does, the other kidney looks fine and people live with just one all the time with no problem. _We_ have to believe that," she insisted as she reached over and brought his hand down to join hers. "All of us. Kaylin _is_ already a big sister and her special love and prayers will be felt by this little one too. If you don't go to the ceremony or on this trip, everyone will think something is wrong," she added.

"Eddie…" he tried again, but found himself in a losing battle as he sought to support her while she was bent on sorting a path forward for them.

"No, Jamie… I don't want anyone else to know yet," she pleaded while shaking her head. "Please, just for now like with Linda and Danny… I just… I can't bear it until we know anything different. Promise me. I know you can't hide this from your Dad and I want to talk with Mom, but other than that we keep it between us, okay? I'm going to tell Wilson that the doctor says it would be better for me to come off the street now… I know I won't be in the right mind for it," she admitted to ease his concerns on that front as she squeezed his fingers tight. "I'm ready to do that no matter where I end up on the job, now please do this for me. Text your father and tell him we ran late, but that you're on your way. You'll be back from Washington on Friday night… it's only a few days, and then in a couple of weeks we'll have another scan and see that everything is okay. Remember… it is until it isn't," she reminded in a familiar way. "What I heard today from my doctor is everything else looks normal and perfect at this stage. That's what I need to focus on."

"Edit Katalin," Jamie sighed as he leaned in to pull up her shirt and kiss her bare belly while conceding to his wife's wishes even as much as it hurt his own heart. There was a desperation in her voice that he was unwilling to test. "Everything's not okay and perfect right now, but it will be. I believe it."

###

"Anything, Frank?"

"If you're referring to Sergeant Reagan's whereabouts, I have not heard," came the tempered reply from the burly figure standing up straight with his back to the door as he stared out of the corner window down at the city he loved.

"I don't have to tell you that Mayor Poole isn't buying any of this," Garrett hemmed as he rocked back on his heels and pursed his lips.

"Really?" Frank asked as he turned around and tilted his head with his trademark mustache masking a cold faux smile. "And just what is it that I'm supposedly selling?"

"Oh, come on it's obvious. You're upset about this whole situation and way the mayor played it in the media so you're yanking Poole's chain a little by making him sit around cooling his heels all morning to wait on you. Well, I've gotta tell you, Frank, he just had his aid order in lunch for them and Corporal Briggs in the conference room. He's not going anywhere until he gets his photo op with Jamie and one of the servicemen who was saved by this program."

"And as I said, I do not know where my son is. He had personal business to take care of first thing this morning so I assume that is what has detained him."

"It's your job to know."

"Really," the Commissioner bit back as he pushed his glasses down and pursed his lips before returning to his chair where he sat and busily rearranged some folders on his desk. "How so?"

"Honestly, I get it already. You blame me for not knowing about the rest… for not getting ahead of it. That's just idiotic. It's like me saying you're responsible for the next random shooting on the street because you should have guessed it might happen."

"Exactly my point," Frank huffed. "That's the job."

"I can't read minds," Garrett insisted. "My crystal ball got damaged at the cleaners last month."

"Oh, cut it out. No one's asking you to."

"Then what's the problem? That we got blindsided? Hey, it happens."

"Did you reach out to your sources in the Mayor's office? Find out what Poole was vetting with his staff?"

"No. I didn't think I had to."

"Turns out you had to."

"Okay, well just for the record, we've had situations like this one come up dozens of times before over the years and it never pissed you off to this degree, so you tell me… is this because of that article which really only reflects positively on this department... exactly what my job as DCPI is supposed to concern itself with by the way, or is this because of your son and the fact that he's personally not happy about it, because I gotta tell you, Frank... if this was any other officer under your command who was standing up the mayor, an entire contingent of press and a decorated army veteran and his family like this with no cause, you'd be ready to yank his badge and hand him a full disciplinary action. Why do I have a feeling that won't be the case here?" Moore accused boldly with little regret as the tempest between the two had only been growing over the past week and it finally flooded over. "As much as you hate to admit it, there are certain perks to being the Commissioner's son that regular people just don't have," he snapped, referring of course to his perceived inequality over the way his stepson's murder investigation was handled.

"And after all of these years I'd think by now you'd know how to hold your tongue," Frank dug back icily. "Wait a second," he ordered before Garrett had turned heel and successfully exited the room. "We're not done here. I have a question for you. If a man finds himself feeling, deep into his life's work, that he is no longer able to separate himself from an unfortunate event and remain objective... and because of that the work can no longer galvanize and energize him... but only irritates and drains… if that starts to happen, is it the sign that it's time to go?"

"That feels like a trick question on about five different levels."

"It's not."

"Is it your way of telling me you're letting me go?"

"No, it is my way of asking your opinion on the hypothetical I just laid out."

"Maybe. Anything else?"

"That will be all, Garrett," Frank replied decisively as he thoughtfully stroked his mustache while the other man finally was permitted to take his leave just as the cell phone on the corner of the desk buzzed with an expected message. A quick look at that text had the Commissioner breathing once more as some of his tension eased since he knew full well what his son and newest daughter-in-law had been occupied with this morning, and every minute of silence that had ticked by in Jamie's uncharacteristic absence had struck more fear into his father's heart. Having been in that same position many times with heartbreaking results no less than twice before Jamie's arrival defied the odds... surely the fact that his youngest was here now meant that the delay had likely only been the result of a typically long wait to receive medical care these days.

"Baker!" he barked with some relief into the intercom. "Sergeant Reagan is on his way up. Assemble everyone in the conference room, and let's get this dog and pony show over with," he ordered without knowing at that very moment so many things had already changed and the worst was yet to come.

* * *

 _Well, it certainly appears that Garrett and Frank's relationship has tumbled down to a new low, and the fact that the DCPI has ducked out of the upcoming trip to Washington might not help the cause as he will be personally unavailable to help his boss through an exceptionally trying time when Mason's contrived plan hits an unexpected speed bump to knock him off target. Next, Jamie explains the events of the morning while confiding in his father who is sadly able to offer personal advice on the matter before his son heads back home to spend his remaining time prior to the trip comforting Eddie and going ahead with the planned big sister reveal for Kaylin._

 _For Lea's question in the reviews regarding Eddie's quest to become a detective, it is her goal, at least here in werks-world, but she's only really at the beginning of her journey at this time. After being on the job about three years now, it had been her intention to work on that before a little bean became an issue, but since the sprout's arrived early she's just trying to keep a hold of the connection to her rabbi for fear that like Jamie, no one else will step forward in that role now that her last name is Reagan._


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

"Baker, hold my calls," Frank ordered on the return trip past her desk as he ushered his reluctant and somewhat harried-looking son forcefully by the arm into his office before closing the door behind them. Jamie had arrived at the fourteenth floor more than an hour and a half late with no further explanation except to say they had run long at their appointment, but had otherwise fulfilled all of his obligations with a firm handshake as he received his commendation and then posed for the required photos with Mayor Poole and the hand-picked Army Corporal and his family who were to be the centerpieces of the follow up article depicting his depression after returning from service, and the fact that Jamie and Rick's program had been responsible for directing him and his family towards available resources just before he was prepared to take his own life. Frank had noticed his son's tight jaw and that telltale pulsating vein over his temple that indicated his own severe state of stress though so had quickly herded the boy away from the reporters at the earliest possible moment and excused themselves from the room, pausing only when they were caught unexpectedly in the hallway by DCLM Chuck Miller who stopped to say congratulations and renew his offer of a position within the legal department here at 1PP.

The noise from the sound of the door clicking shut behind them had barely dissipated before his father's voice knifed through the air even as Jamie refused to turn around and meet his eyes. "Now then, it's too damn cold outside to haul your butt over to the pier with a couple of fishing rods… I guess this will have to do," Frank started. "So, Jamie, what's going on?"

"What do you mean?" came the defeated-sounding reply as his son took up a familiar position at the window and declined to show his face in that moment. Jamie knew his dad was on to him, but at this time he just didn't feel like he had it in him to say the words out loud or deal with the inevitable questions to follow.

"C'mon, I'm your father," Frank insisted. "You've never been late to anything in your life without good reason and I've got a vested interest here... I'm a grandfather, too," he added with a sense of dread when his first inquiry went unanswered. "Now, what did the doctor say?" he directed. "Is it Eddie or…"

"The baby," Jamie whispered in confirmation with a small shake of his head as he looked upward towards the sky instead and fought back the tears. "There's… um… well, it looks like there might be a problem with one of the kidneys… it could be blocked or not working quite right," he admitted. "We, uh… we have to wait to find out until she's a little further along before they can really tell for sure if that's all. It might be nothing, or…" he trailed off and bit his lip. "Or not," he finished.

"Oh, Jamie," his father breathed as he leaned against the back of the couch where he was standing and gave his son some time and space, knowing full well the raw sense of helplessness and weight of news like that on prospective parents. "How is Eddie taking…"

"She's at the glass is completely full until it cracks and shatters stage," Jamie interrupted and answered honestly as he felt at the moment before turning around as the strain was evident on his face since the worry for his wife and how she might react had now doubled his fears. "Dr. Geisner and the tech said that everything else looks normal, so the odds are it's just this problem that can be dealt with or might not even cause an issue in the end, but Ed… she's not ready to handle anything else so please… she knew I couldn't keep it from you, but for now we're only really planning to tell Eva otherwise."

"Of course," Frank assured as he stepped across the room to pull his son over with a heavy embrace which was thankfully not rebuked. "I understand, more than you could possibly know…" he added. "Your mother, she was the same way when we lost those… well, I'm so sorry, Jamie… that's not going to happen, is it? You said this could be nothing and the odds…"

"The odds say this can occur in one out of every hundred pregnancies," he admitted. "And beyond that _most_ of the time nothing happens, and _most_ children affected with this even more severely are basically okay _most_ of the time… _most, most, most_ …" he trailed off in frustration. "Except for the ones that aren't, and if that happens to be you I guess none of the rest of it matters. Worst case is unlikely but really bad, Dad. There's so many other things, but the babies, they sometimes don't make it after they're born… there's not enough fluid in there with them and the lungs don't get a chance to develop properly. Eddie… she could carry this baby all the way until the end and then… when it came time we'd have to say goodbye and not hello," he choked and a heavy sad silence followed. "Knowing that would… I can't even imagine how to…"

"Well, the odds were almost completely against you being here today, and look how that turned out," Frank encouraged as he stopped that train of thought even as his own heart fell and he stepped back to look at his handsome and well-educated son standing before him in a crisp NYPD Sergeant's uniform with a newly added recognition bar above his polished badge. "Actually, considering all the things you've gotten yourself into during the past couple of years, you've almost made beating the odds an art form... and those were bad ones, not usually in your favor as they are here… a car accident with a certain Chevelle and that time the building fell down on you and the fact you walked away from both with hardly a scratch come to mind."

"But what happens when my luck runs out, Dad? What if it's this time? It would almost be easier to take… if that something happened to me, not the baby."

"For you maybe, but not for anyone else. Have faith, Jamie... Reagans almost always beat the house, it's the Irish way. Everything will be fine, you'll see. And Eddie's a strong woman, she'll handle this. You both will. She's right to stay positive and not dwell on what might be given what you've been told…. that doesn't mean you need to worry about her or that she's not ready to face it if God forbid it's needed. Just be there for her and she'll do the same for you."

"Is that what you told Danny when he came to you about Linda?" Jamie asked pointedly before he looked away again and moved over behind his father's desk to pick up one of the many family photos displayed there. "I wish Mom was here too," he murmured as he traced the outline of her smiling face next to him at graduation.

"How did you know?" Frank asked and then noted when one corner of Jamie's mouth twitched upward just the slightest bit as the great Commissioner had been caught out.

"I didn't for sure, until now," his son admitted. "Old grandfather's trick," he smirked slightly. "Ask a question like you already know the answer and then deflect."

"It's not the same for them," Frank revealed with a deep sigh as he considered the sad circumstances now surrounding both his children and their personal families. "It's a physical problem with her, but just like your mother Linda doesn't feel complete yet and wants to try because she can't accept it. Danny though… he's conflicted. He only wants what's best and safest for her. They'll know more after her tests and decide where to go from there."

"Well, then I guess we have more in common with each other than he gives us credit for," Jamie replied softly. "Eddie already loves this baby more than anything and wants to act like nothing's wrong… and I want it to be that way more than anything, but I'm worried about her too. She's sending me to Washington and pulling herself onto modified duty, effective immediately," he explained. "There's nothing we can do but wait and see for now until the next ultrasound before Christmas so everything is okay, she says... until it isn't… I guess that's what I'm left with. I'll catch you bright and early for that ride to the airport, Dad," Jamie added with a heavy heart before walking out the door. "Right now I just need to be at home with her and sweetness."

###

"Guess what, baby?"

"What, Mommy?" Kaylin looked up eagerly after a light supper featuring everyone's favorite comfort food of baked macaroni and cheese was finished and the kitchen cleaned up. "Are we going to soccer?" she asked, still disappointed that the weekly indoor playdate with her friends had been postponed tonight since Jamie originally thought he would be on shift and then wanted to stay in with her and Eddie after the trying news of the day and the fact that he was leaving early the next morning.

"No, baby… not tonight, we'll do that again next week, but c'mere, Daddy and I have a big surprise for you," Eddie replied as she led the little girl over to the couch and sat her down in between them both with all of their faces illuminated off and on by the most cherished flashing lights of the still-untamed psychedelic Christmas tree.

"Is it a present?" Kaylin asked and clapped her hands in anticipation while Jamie wrapped his arm around her and kissed the top of her head before letting his wife take the lead on this most important family announcement.

"Sort of…" Eddie continued as she pulled out a bag from behind the chair. "It's even better… a very special kind of gift that even Mommy doesn't have. Look at these," she urged as she put two nearly identical baby albums on the table… one decorated with carefully chosen soft duckie illustrations in obvious deference to Kaylin's favorite feathered friends and the other cuddly giraffes. "Do you know what they are?"

"Picture books!" the preschooler laughed as they were some of her most-loved things. "I know, silly!"

"That's right, baby," Eddie smirked as her nose involuntarily twitched since that last word always conjured up a jealous twinge or two over Jamie's prior fling with the overly perky Addison Greene who had surprisingly settled into a serious nearly year-long relationship with his former rookie partner George Mahoy, now a rising star analyst in the CompStat division at 1PP. "These are very, very special ones though. Do you want to know why?"

"Why?"

"Because these are ones that hold our first pictures from when we're really little so we can look back at them when we get bigger. Daddy and I realized we didn't have one like this for you because you came to us in a very special way on your second birthday, remember?"

Of course Kaylin remembered that day… just hours really after the terror she had experienced while trapped in that overturned car as it slid towards the river with her dead and previously neglectful biological mother and her boyfriend hanging there in the front seats… those images had been irreparably burned into the little girl's eidetic memory and taken months of careful attention to overcome. Both Jamie and Eddie were nervous about reviving any of that since Kaylin had made such strides in adjusting over the course of the last months, even after the encounter with Jared Quinlan in this very house, but more than anything they wanted her to feel included in this baby process so decided to chance it.

"So, we talked to Auntie Adele and Uncle Tony because they knew you back before then," Jamie continued to hug her as he moved things along while referring to the Renzulli's who were the little girl's godparents from birth and family friends of Bill Jeffers, Kaylin's maternal grandfather and Renzulli's former partner. It was his wild daughter, Jayne, who had taken up with Jared Quinlan in upstate New York one fateful night, and the resultant now three-year-old product of that unlikely union sat blinking back at him right now. "And they were able to find some pictures of you when you were very little," he added as Eddie pulled out an envelope with a small collection of photos of a baby Kaylin, carefully chosen of course to show only her biological grandparents and the Renzulli's in them from her Christening day. Sadly it was a very limited selection as Jayne had been unconcerned with prenatal care so there were no earlier views to be found and everything else of hers had been discarded or lost in the accident.

"We wanted to put them in your very own book though, baby," Eddie encouraged as she opened the duckie version to show Kaylin the picture pages and the places to write things like heights and dates for lost teeth. "Because we love you so much and it's where you started, and then after those come our very favorite ones when you're with us," she smiled and kissed the little girl as she pulled many more colorful and happy printed versions over towards them starting with that very first selfie Jamie had taken with Kaylin and him alone in the apartment with those birthday cupcakes from Mrs. Henderson over a year ago. "Then we have one with all of us when you met Grandpa and Pop Pop, your big party, Thanksgiving and Christmas last year, then our trip out to the beach to see Uncle Spencer, one with Nagyanya and your first day at preschool, the wedding with your pretty dress and all that," she showed as she laid them out in order. "Next we can put one of you and your tree!"

"If it doesn't burn out the camera lens," Jamie quipped as he loosened up a little before receiving a quick elbow in the ribs from his wife.

"Is this okay?" Eddie asked as Kaylin was carefully pawing through the pictures and looking at them… studying her own infant images very carefully. "Can you believe how little you were? Just a tiny peanut compared to Uncle Tony in that one! Isn't it funny to see him holding you like a football? See how much you've grown since then!"

"Maybe," Kaylin replied quietly which of course was her code for "Not really," as the little girl was clearly uncomfortable with this blast from her not so distant past so Eddie quickly moved ahead to the main feature as a distraction.

"Sweetie, the reason we wanted to show you these things and have your baby book is because I need your help," she explained as she drew the little girl close and opened the second giraffe bedecked edition which had a few of the loose ultrasound pictures laying in it. "Do you know what these are?" she asked and then continued after Kaylin shook her head no at the strange looking images after a glance. "These are the very first pictures of your new baby brother or sister that's growing in Mommy's tummy right now… really, right there!" Eddie laughed when Kaylin looked at her now just slightly poochy stomach with surprise. "Just like Mrs. Garner had a baby brother for Megan a few months ago… remember how big her belly got first before little Tommy was born? Mine is going to do the same thing, and then sometime right about when school is done in the spring we are going to have a brand new baby of our own here and you are going to be a big sister!" she added as Jamie took a big silent breath and offered a prayer that things would go exactly like that. "Until then we can only see the baby growing once in awhile in this kind of special picture the doctor takes, and I was wondering if you could help me keep them safe by putting them in this book while we work on yours too. Right now it's only this big," she explained by measuring the air with her fingers. "Tinier even than those little kittens we saw last week when we dropped the blanket donations from school off at the shelter to help take care of them… but those are kitty babies and someday they will grow up to be almost as big as Bear too."

"But how did the baby get in there?" Kaylin asked as the dreaded questions from the pragmatic and very intelligent little girl started.

"Oh, well sometimes when daddies love mommies they help her make the baby with lots of hugs and special prayers..." Jamie bounced in with an answer before Eddie could get flustered and go into too much detail over that one since this was sure to be the talk of Sister Grace's preschool class the following day, especially when the topic of baby Jesus winding up in the manger was already in the forefront with the nativity play they were practicing. "Tequila never hurts, either," he mouthed at his wife when the little girl looked away garnering a swift swat with a pillow for the reference to that near disastrous honeymoon night in a cold cottage in Iceland that had resulted in the little bean's presence in the first place.

"Does it hurt to come out?" was the next one to be offered complete with a follow up. "Megan told her mommy was crying that her tummy hurt when Tommy got born."

"Sometimes, yes a little," Eddie answered truthfully. "But it goes away fast and mommies don't mind after that because we love our little ones so much no matter how they come to us," she added.

"Not my old mommy," Kaylin added sadly shaking her head. "She was bad and went 'way in the car, and that daddy scare me," she replied before turning to cling tightly to Eddie's side as the memories came back and frightened her.

"Oh, well they weren't the ones you were supposed to be with, that's why God sent you to us later," Jamie added quickly as he slid over and her two parents sandwiched the little girl with reassuring hugs and kisses. "We're going to be your daddy and mommy forever now so you never have to worry about that," he assured. "And with you here to help us take the very best care of this baby, because you're so smart and such a good girl, Kaylin Elizabeth… I think he sent another one to us this way so we can all be a family like Jack and Sean are brothers and with Uncle Danny and Aunt Linda they have four in their house… you'll have a brother or sister you can play with too."

"Will she have to stay in my room?" Kaylin asked as Eddie beamed instantly with an 'I told you so' look behind her back at the immediate sisterly reference much to Jamie's great disappointment.

"No, sweetie," Eddie assured. "Before the baby comes out, we'll take that spare room next to the one Nagyanya sleeps in when she's here and make that into the nursery so the baby will have her own room… or _his,"_ she clarified at her husband's audible huff of indignation. "We won't know if we get to have a little boy or girl until the doctor tells us later, but you can help us get it all ready and pick out some of the things to put in there when we know, okay?"

"Will Bear like the baby?" followed as the big cat had given up pilfering any scraps out in the kitchen and wandered into the living room to see what all the fuss was about before skirting the tree with a quick jog and retiring to the rug on the landing to clean his whiskers as his glittery blue collar reflected the lighting, the lone holdover from those short-lived days when he had been adopted by the Gaye family up the street and was better known as Marvin before escaping one too many times and eventually returning to his preferred home here.

"Of course, honey. Bear likes everyone in our family," Eddie assured.

"Not Uncle Danny or Nagyanya," came the honest reply that had Eddie and Jamie chuckling.

###

"Well that went pretty well, considering," Eddie sighed as she crawled into bed and curled up to Jamie's side later that night after Kaylin had gone to sleep and he had finished packing. "I lost count of how many times she asked how the baby got in there in the first place though. I think we need to send a memo out to the family so everyone gives her the same answer. I'd hate for Pop to try to tackle that one on his own… we'll wind up being called into the principal's office to explain what a bottle of Reyka Icelandic Tequila has to do with anything… although Reyka," she paused with a furrowed brow. "That might make a pretty girl's name and carry on the family tradition," she pondered as she considered the history of that old bottle of famous Jameson Irish Whiskey in Frank's liquor cabinet. "Reyka Reagan… eh, maybe not."

"Mm-hmm," Jamie murmured distractedly as he lay propped up with his laptop open on a pillow.

"Do I have to ask what you're reading about?" Eddie prodded with a tighter hug as she lay against his shoulder. "I don't want to hear about numbers and percentages, Jamie. I'm telling you… I already know this baby is going to be fine."

"Boston Children's Hospital is the top-ranked pediatric urology center for this in the country," he continued while ignoring her as she knew he would; arming himself with knowledge was the way Jamison Reagan coped with situations like this. "It's good that's so close. It says that only 75 percent of the babies with even severe blockages need surgery and of those, 95 percent are resolved. More than half of the other cases resolve on their own without treatment by the time the baby is born or soon after."

"That's exactly what Dr. Geisner told you this morning, so why didn't you believe her?"

"I'm sorry, honey… I guess I just sort of panicked," Jamie admitted as he closed the cover and put the laptop down on the nightstand. "It's hard to imagine having to make choices like that, you know? It's such a huge responsibility. What if you pick the wrong doctor and something bad happens because of that? It could change someone's whole life. Dad told me once that the only reason I'm here is that he and Mom found the right specialist when she accidentally got pregnant again. I just want the best for you and this baby, lambchop. I feel better now after reading all this though."

"Well, that's good," Eddie sighed in relief. "I really didn't want you flying to Washington tomorrow all knotted up and distracted. You have to be on top of your game to go off and save the free world," she snickered and then grew pensive with a sigh. "I on the other hand will need to turn in my cape," she added. "Dexter got ticked off that I wrecked the patrol schedule with no notice, so now I have a three-day vacation to think about it," she frowned.

"He gave you a rip for switching to modified when the doctor said it was a good idea, just to be safe?" Jamie bristled. "Now I really am going down there to punch him out," he muttered.

"Well, just look at it this way… I don't have to worry about someone watching Kaylin for the rest of the week while you're gone, and that's probably a good thing with that big storm brewing. The weatherman said it might turn into a Nor'easter and hit here Sunday. I switch to days at the desk next week, oh joy," she added. "If I can't take sitting next to him and Rivera doesn't offer to help, I'll put in the transfer request. Kara might be doing the same anyway… she's hoping Renzulli can get her moved over to the 3-5 to be with you guys."

"That shouldn't happen, someone needs to…" Jamie trailed off, furious that the female officers at the 12th were having to make such decisions. "I should…"

"Turn off the light and get some sleep," Eddie finished for him as she reached over and gave him a kiss, savoring what unknown to both would be their last night together in this bed for some time. "I told you, I can handle it myself. Tomorrow's going to be a big day and I want you to be rested and ready for it."

* * *

 _Yup, we are creeping closer to that point in the story that mirror's "Resurrection" where the Reagan's lives turn upside down once more, but first there are a few more chapters and new introductions to be made as Mason's plan is set in motion. Next up, Jamie and Rick have a chat on the plane as our rescue buddy feels out the situation while they are headed to DC, and we find out what kind of nasty surprise a certain plaid-coated neighbor has left for Eddie and Kaylin to deal with while Jamie is gone._


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

"Jesus, Reagan… what are you doing now? Studying for the goddamn medical boards?" Rick asked as he glanced at the content of Jamie's open laptop while uncomfortably fidgeting around in the stiff adjoining seat of the small commuter plane as he tried to cram his long legs in to let people pass in the aisle without bumping the back of the one in front of him, having caught the ire of Anne Wheeler, one of the secretaries from the mayor's office, twice already. United Commutair flight 119 had been completely reserved to ferry personnel from the NYPD and the mayor's office directly from Newark to Washington for multiple conferences taking place within the city, but a last minute mechanical problem had left them with this smaller and less amenable aircraft. In addition to Jamie and Rick's panel meeting, Frank and his staff were slated to attend two events for the commissioners of major metropolitan areas while Poole himself had been called to testify before Congress on matters of Homeland Security. A return flight had been booked for late Friday evening.

"Just doing some research," Jamie admitted as he closed the cover and prepared for takeoff while the small prop plane taxied down the runway on schedule for a brief ninety-minute flight to the Capitol. Space was tight in the cabin and it was a great relief to him that they were located behind the woman sitting to the fore of Rick as she had been sniffling, coughing and sneezing nearly from the onset, insisting to everyone who asked it was allergies.

"Research? On what, the plague?" Rick continued to grump with a knowing nod forward to his nemesis who responded with a cold "I heard that" back.

"Nothing important for now," Jamie replied as he sat back and tried to relax given the situation with the baby that he and Eddie were facing. _Maybe she's right,_ he thought as he recalled the conversation and assurances she had given Frank that morning when he arrived with his detail to pick Jamie up. She had been very strong in her conviction that everything would be fine while they were gone as she hugged her father-in-law and then kissed her husband goodbye. "What's with you, Rick?" he questioned as another bump of the upright tray had an already annoyed Anne tutting behind her again. "I thought Danny told me once that devil docs could fall asleep sitting upside down propped up in any old corner. Were you expecting first class? Because the mayor is up front and I don't think I can kick Baker or my Dad out of the first row here in the back."

"No, but a little legroom would help," Rick griped as he considered the fact that the six-four Police Commissioner was unlikely to give up his more spacious seat. "I'd rather be in the cargo bay of a Chinook with a squad of hungry desert rats coming off a week straight of patrol than stuffed in this little tin can here with no air and somebody that doused themselves in Chanel _freaking_ No. 5 before getting aboard," he directed with another purposeful bump on the seat in front of him. "Even us smoke eaters have a sense of smell, you know!" he continued irreverently despite the expected return huff. "So what's on tap for today? I know you have our itinerary planned down to the minute. Do we need to synchronize watches first or something? I'm new to this secret agent man cop stuff."

"You know, you're damn next to impossible to take out in public. Nag, nag, nag…" Jamie laughed, a sound that was noted with relief by his father sitting a few rows ahead as Frank had been concerned about his son leaving home at this time. "Is it any wonder you eat alone every night? Early lunch after we get to the hotel, private meeting with Chairmen Atwater at the Rayburn House Office Building at two o'clock, and then there's some sort of optional dinner mixer we're invited to at the Brashford Hotel in the evening. We make the full presentation to the round table group on late Thursday afternoon."

"Well, I don't know about that dinner," Rick frowned. "Another couple of hours around stuffed suits making nice over appetizers is for the money grubbers that are down here looking to put their hands in Uncle Sam's pockets," he declared. "Not really for me, bud. You clean up nice though," he added in deference to the expensive-type suit Jamie had pulled out of his seldom-used Manhattan lawyer's wardrobe.

"Thanks, I think," Jamie replied while shaking his head as the small plane climbed to altitude. "One step at a time, Smokey," he grinned and sat back wondering what Eddie was up to, promising himself to touch base with her as soon as they deplaned and arrived at the hotel later that morning.

###

"Ooh, c'mon baby girl, hurry… we're gonna be so late," Eddie fretted as she shooshed Kaylin out in the cold morning air to ferry her the eight blocks or so up the way to St. Anthony's for her morning preschool class. "Mommy's so sorry, honey. I fell asleep on the couch after Daddy left and I never heard the alarm go off upstairs," she apologized while buckling her daughter into the car seat of her new crossover parked in the driveway knowing the little one was as fussy as her father normally about such things. In spite of her assurances to everyone else, including Jamie and Frank, Eddie had spent most of the night with eyes wide open in bed worrying about the results of the previous day's scan and the impact on the baby and the rest of the family, particularly her husband who she had pressured to stay the course and fly off to Washington even though she knew he did not want to. She had finally drifted off to sleep just an hour or so before Jamie's early alarm sounded so was finding herself fatigued and a little off her game that morning and was in a way grateful for Dexter's forced days off. Obviously it had been the right call to pull her distracted self off the street she considered before her thoughts were interrupted and redirected by a shrill little voice from behind.

"But Mommy! Sister Grace said I get to try on my angel wings 'fore church today," Kaylin worried as Eddie closed the door and hurried around over to the driver's side.

"I know, I know… I'll talk to her, don't worry," she assured while throwing her purse over to the passenger side and stepping on the brake before pressing the fancy-shmancy keyless dummy button, as Jamie had taken to calling it… only to hear the starter attempt to turn over very reluctantly as the interior lights on the dashboard dimmed. "Oh, no, no, no! Don't you dare do this to me today!" she cried with a frustrated smack on the steering wheel for good measure before trying again... successfully this time with a sigh of relief as the engine came to life. "Oh, thank you, thank you!" she exclaimed as she patted the dash apologetically. "I wonder why the battery is so low? It's almost brand new, but maybe it's the cold or we left a light on… I thought the car was supposed to tell me that kind of stuff though," she frowned at the fact that her fully loaded vehicle had let her down. Jamie would of course have had some choice comments about her tech-possessed ride, but what he didn't know certainly wouldn't hurt him. "We would have been stuck at home all day considering we've got Daddy's precious car blocked in the garage."

"Mommy, 'bout my costume?!" Kaylin reminded as Eddie shifted the car into gear and carefully backed out into the street before turning towards the church, noting much to her chagrin that their unwelcome neighbor was placing his garbage outside on the stoop in a small trash bag for what she assumed was for the afternoon curbside pickup. "Well, hello to you 'it's not mister, just Mason Lockwood,'" she sniffed under her breath without a friendly wave as they passed. "I wonder just what it is you're really hiding," she mused to herself, unaware that a pair of cold amused gray eyes were following her path down the street now with a knowing smirk as the psychological warfare Mason Malevsky had carefully planned and prepared for was about to commence on several fronts both here and in Washington.

"I know, baby… we're going," she assured out loud with a glance in the rear-view mirror after hearing a huff from the impatient little girl. "Maybe we'll stop by Grandpa's house and see Pop Pop after school," she offered to pacify her while hoping to ask for the older man's further advice on this Dexter situation before finally throwing the towel in and giving up. Indeed, that was her intention after returning home while Kaylin was supposed to be occupied for the morning having successfully dropped the little girl off and smoothed things over with her teacher while keeping the car running to recharge the battery. With unexpected time on her hands due to her suspension, and a determination not to follow Jamie's path and obsess over researching the baby's every possible condition online until it was confirmed, Eddie spent the next hour doing some light housework and organizing the decorations she intended to use from the number of boxes Jamie had left upstairs for her to sort through. Mrs. Peterson might have been a dedicated hoarder, but at one time she truly had good taste and must have had the house looking like a picture postcard given the amount of holiday swag left behind.

She was still contemplating her options after a call to her mother went unanswered when her cell phone unexpectedly rang a few minutes later. Assuming that it was Eva calling her back or Jamie checking in after texting earlier to confirm his safe arrival in DC, she was surprised to see the caller ID for Kaylin's school come up instead.

"Hello?" she answered with some trepidation, wondering if the costume saga had failed to play out in a positive fashion or worse… the baby sibling announcement had come off the wheels.

"Mrs. Reagan?" came the unmistakable voice of Kaylin's teacher as it carried over the line and Eddie's heart leaped into her throat immediately as her daughter could be heard crying hysterically in the background. "I'm sorry to call, dear. It's Sister Grace from St. Anthony's. Now don't worry," she assured quickly in an experienced fashion. "Kaylin is not injured or sick, but we've had a rather upsetting incident here at the school this morning and I'm afraid she's just inconsolable," the woman advised. "I'm calling from the nurse's office. I think it would be best if you could come and pick her up if that's possible."

"Of course. What… what happened?" Eddie asked even as she was reaching for her coat and rushing into the kitchen to snag her purse, ready to run out the door in another instant.

"Unfortunately… well, we're not sure exactly, but we believe a very large cat must have been struck by a car outside of the church this morning while we were in service and the poor creature appears to have dragged itself over to the walkway steps before it passed... it was laying in the back right where the children come out of the sanctuary to cross over to the school classrooms. I'm afraid it was Kaylin's turn to lead the line outside, and so she saw it immediately when I turned around to hold the door for the other students. It was a very upsetting and gruesome sight as you can imagine," the older woman admitted before adding another few details that explained the depth of the trauma since it was evident from Kaylin's continued wailing cries there was more. "Mr. Walters, the janitor, has already removed it. I'm afraid though that it closely resembles your own pet," she revealed. "Kaylin is convinced that it is her dear Bear and will not hear otherwise… I have seen the pictures of him from her projects... I'm so sorry but it does appear that it might be the case."

"WHAT?!" Eddie gasped as she whipped around to find a familiar pair of green iridescent eyes blinking back at her lazily from their preferred perch on top of the refrigerator as a self-satisfying stretch followed and confirmed their own cat was wholly unconcerned and well. "Oh no! It's not! Please tell her that he's here in the kitchen with me; I'm looking up at him right now! He's fine! Put her on the phone, please, Sister," she pleaded.

"MOMMY!" came the strangled sobs almost immediately. "MOMMY! HE HAD RED ALL OVER!"

"Oh, God. No, no, baby… Shhhh… Bear is right here on top of the fridge where he likes to be. He's fine, I promise you," Eddie tried to soothe even as her heart was breaking at the sound of such anguish in the little girl's voice and she quickly made her way out of the front door, forgetting both her coat and to set the alarm in the process although the door locked automatically behind her. "I'm getting in the car right now to come get you, okay? I'll be there right away. Try to take some deep breaths and not cry so hard, please sweetie. You need to calm down. I understand how upset you are, but everything is going to be fine. Bear is fine… you'll see as soon as you get home."

"BUT HE GOT DEAD LIKE MY OLD MOMMY!"

"Oy vey... Harvard, where are you when I need you now?" Eddie huffed to herself as she tried to settle her pounding heart and choose her words carefully after getting in the driver's seat and closing the door, wishing that Jamie was here more than anything else because he was the only one who seemed to be able to get through to Kaylin whenever she worked herself into a state like this. "Honey, sometimes bad accidents just happen. That poor kitty probably ran across the street at the wrong time and didn't see a car coming. That's why Mommy and Daddy tell you to be so careful when we're in the crosswalks, okay? I'm sure he was a good kitty that went to heaven. Now, tell Sister Grace that Mommy is in the car and I will be there to pick you up in just a few minutes, sweetie. Please don't cry anymore, baby," she begged as her right foot depressed the brake pedal and she reached down to press the dummy button and...

Nothing happened.

* * *

 _Damn that Mason Malevsky for traumatizing our poor baby girl like that as some of his more despicable actions in "Resurrection" are mirrored, plus he's taken to playing games with Eddie's new car which will soon prove even more frustrating. How will Kaylin recover from her fright, or will this snowball into something worse as further events of the day will only add to and play upon her greatest fears?_

 _Next, we find out what followed that morning while Eddie and Kaylin get some physical and mental TLC from a particularly kind, retired commissioner… can anyone say soup and grilled cheese? In the meantime, Jamie's day in Washington shapes up and rolls along as he and Rick run into an unexpected familiar face after their first high-powered meeting in the Capitol._

 _For LuvJamieReagan who asked about knowing more on Linda's current situation, in a strict timeline sense we see more of Danny and his wife together ((ahem)) in the evening of this very day which will offer some big clues as to what might be coming, but in actual chapters, not until the start of 19 since the whole family has an action-packed afternoon both in Bay Ridge and Washington ahead._


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

"Well, I don't think it's broken, slugger… but you definitely have a good bruise coming up on the top here," Henry advised before he carefully placed a bag of frozen peas on Eddie's propped up bare foot as she sat on the couch in the living room of the Reagan family home and flinched. "Maybe you should stop by the urgent care for an x-ray, anyway. What's with you women and kicking car tires? I still remember back when Mary hauled off and wailed on the Chevelle when Danny pulled his stunt at graduation… broke her toe and flopped around here in a big boot for more than a month; she had open sandals on though. You were lucky to be wearing some sensible boots there, young lady," he chided.

"No, Pop, I'm fine I think," Eddie assured with a pouting face, embarrassed at her own actions. "I don't want Jamie to find out how stupid I was or give him something else to worry about while he's away… I didn't say anything when he called a few minutes ago, and I really didn't even feel it until I got up to the school and was standing around for a bit talking to Sister Grace and the principal. That's when it seemed to swell up in my shoe. They offered to have someone drive us home, but I said no, and then when we started back it got really tight and hurt so it seemed like a better idea to stop here for a little while," she admitted.

"Well, that was the adrenaline talking at first," Henry frowned as he sat back with a knowing tone in his voice. "Running eight blocks up the street in this cold weather with no coat on in your condition was not exactly the best idea you've ever had either, sweetheart. What were you thinking?"

"Kaylin was crying and upset, Pop… that's all I was thinking about," Eddie admitted in a whisper as the little girl was in the kitchen and had been settled at the table with some milk and a few of her favorite oatmeal cookies. "I panicked when my car wouldn't start and the Mustang was stuck in front of it in the garage, so I just got out and I guess I lost my temper and gave it a whack. Stupid battery," she sighed. "Now I have to get that fixed or replaced somehow… I'm going to have to call the dealership. I don't have a car otherwise."

"Well, nonsense… we'll just have Danny come over after work and have a look if that's all it is," Henry suggested. "And you'll stay here with me in the meantime. You shouldn't be walking on that foot for at least the rest of the day. Besides, I already put the soup on."

"I can't, Pop. I promised Kaylin we would go home. She won't be settled until she sees that Bear is okay with her own eyes, and Danny… I think he's probably busy. I don't want to bother him... I'll take care of it. They gave us that total roadside assistance package when we bought it. I just have to call the number and they'll send someone out," she deflected, not wanting to get into the whole pregnancy issues between the couples which had been confirmed by Jamie after he had returned from his father's office the previous afternoon, and certainly not wanting to let on about what was learned from her own appointment. "We can always use Uber if we have to," she joked to lighten the mood.

"Boober? What's that? Some kind of new mommy support group?" Henry sounded in all seriousness although he was trying to hide a twinkle in his eyes.

"No, U-B-E-R," Eddie spelled out and corrected with a laugh for the older man even though she wasn't fooled by his attempted humor. "It's an independent taxi service. You sign up with an app on your phone and whenever you need a ride somewhere, you can pick a nearby driver to come get you… even pays automatically by credit card and you get to rate them," she explained.

"Humph, sounds like just a newfangled way of calling a cab to me," he grumped.

"Pretty much the same," Eddie agreed as she settled back down against the cushion. "If you can talk Kaylin into staying for lunch, soup sounds good," she admitted. "I hate that she got so scared today… I feel like I let her down. Jamie would have been able to handle it better."

"Well, a grilled cheese sandwich will probably do the trick, and how can you possibly control something like that when she was at school?" Henry questioned. "You said yourself the janitor showed you the collar he saved in case the owners came around and it even matched Bear's… the local pet store probably sells a hundred of those a month… it's just one of those freak things that happened. Didn't it have a tag?"

"Yeah, all it said was Gonsalves, though, no first name or address," Eddie admitted as she had no inkling why that name might be important, and Henry had been too far removed from the minute details of the Blue Templar case so there was no recognition offered for a seemingly unconnected common surname. "The phone number was disconnected, so... the poor people may never know what happened. I just hope they didn't have a little kid who is waiting for their kitty to come home," she admitted as she cast a sad eye towards her own daughter in the kitchen. "Things got really messed up this week, Pop," she revealed with hesitation… as much as she had been determined to keep all this inside, it was nearly impossible to do with someone who had turned into her most trusted family confident outside of her own marriage in the last year.

"So more than the cat," he asked sadly as he watched her tear up and nod. "I can read Francis like an open book too," he explained. "I knew something was up the minute I saw him last night. Alright, sweetheart… now, let me get that soup and those sandwiches and we'll talk," he promised.

###

"I've gotta hand it to you, Reagan… you sure know how to talk the talk. You're completely in your element here," Rick observed as the pair exited the offices of Chairmen Atwater at the Rayburn House Office Building in downtown Washington after their initial meeting ran near the two-hour mark. "We lucked out getting hooked up with a lifetime suit and not some retired general. That guy was really impressed with you… especially once you started swapping Harvard Law stories. We were only supposed to be in there for a half hour and you weaseled more than an extra sixty… never happen when all the stripes get involved at the table though… they'll just want it straight and then the rest of the suits will file everything under 'it costs too much so we don't care about what happens to these kids once they get home'… just like the damn VA system they promised to fix."

"Oh come on, Rick… not every politician is bad, and besides we're just here to present our ideas and show that these small changes are working, not look for any type of funding. We've gotta be unique in that regard so maybe they'll listen. Atwater's the one that invited us down here in the first place. I think he's genuinely interested in what we're doing. He said we'd have his support tomorrow in front of the full committee."

"Believe it when I see it," Rick continued to gripe as they started to walk out. "Although we got further than I thought, especially when it looked like he was going to invite you home for a catered dinner when you mentioned we missed lunch because the hotel restaurant was closed down to vent after a stove fire. All I hear when they open their mouths is 'blah blah blah,'" he demonstrated. "You were able to break it down into normal-speak at least. We make a good team though," he continued as they passed a few people seated in the hall waiting area. "You know me with the ideas and stellar good looks, and you with the slick suit and mouthpiece. What?" he snickered as Jamie just shook his head. "You ever see a beefcake calendar with cops on it? Everyone knows the chicks dig firefighters."

Jamie was just about to lay into his friend with an appropriate comeback, thinking back to a previous conversation he'd had with Eddie on that very topic when the pair were interrupted by a comment behind them.

"Well if it's not Rick Fellows in civvies hanging out with the chest candy... as I live and breathe I never thought I would see the day."

Rick immediately stiffened and swung around in shock at the familiar voice in an unfamiliar place. "Kenzie," he mouthed as he took in the sight of the slight but very attractive auburn-haired woman as she stood up, dressed in a vibrant blue diamond-patterned blouse with an equally bright flowing skirt and her signature Birkenstock sandals despite the formality of the location and the cold weather outside.

"Kenzie?" Jamie questioned as he immediately put two and two together with a previous conversation. "As in _the_ Kenzie?" he smirked as he looked between them with raised eyebrows while Rick continued to stand slack-jawed, clearly still shaken with the unexpected appearance of this blast from his not-so-recent past no matter how he had tried to push it off before. "Wow."

"Oh, so I already have a reputation with this one, terrific," she commented as she strode forward confidently and offered her hand. "Dr. Charlotte MacKenzie," she introduced herself. "Just plain Kenzie works though, obviously. I learned to answer to almost anything with these guys except for momma. Where'd you pick the newb up?" she asked Rick with a nod to Jamie.

"You'd never believe it if I told you," he answered as he broke his stupor. "Sorry, my bad… name's Jamie Reagan from New York City, a sergeant with the blue bloods up there," he informed in the most basic manner and then immediately refocused back on her as Jamie felt like an instant third wheel. "What… what are you doing here, Kenz?" he stuttered, his heart still thudding more than he would have liked to admit. "You left the Corps? Why?"

"Had the chance to get on with my own research instead of spinning my wheels in the old men's club, and now here I am still waiting my turn behind you, apparently," she revealed with a sly smile and shake of the head as her matching hazel eyes sparkled. "I got pushed back an hour with Atwater and had to cool my heels out here in the hall. Some things never change do they? Guess you two had a nice chat with the Chairman… you lift his wallet or is there still funding left for the rest of us with something to offer?" she questioned. "He's a clepto, you know," she added with a pointed look towards Jamie and a smirk back to Rick. "Watch yourself. I always wound up missing half my surgical instruments whenever Fellows flew in with a broken boot he wanted me to fix… and New York City? Got any suggestions on where to get good Thai food? I just put my bags down there for at least a two-for in Upper Manhattan near Columbia University Med," she explained.

"Manhattan… don't you always rave about that Cookhouse restaurant on 9th in Midtown near your place?" Jamie answered quickly with what he felt to be pertinent information before Rick had a chance to respond even as the older man rolled an evil eye at his partner in crime and gave him a small shove in the shoulder. "What is this, Reagan… high school?" he muttered under his breath.

"So you're up in the big city now too? Huh... will wonders never cease," Kenzie replied as she pondered the chances of ending up living so close to this man after years spent bumping into him while skipping through countries half a world away. "Still running band-aids in a bird?" she asked, assuming that the former naval doc had joined an EMS helicopter flight crew upon his retirement from active duty in the Marines and return to the states. "What hospital?"

"Fire department, actually," Rick admitted with a half smile. "Still pulling them out of ditches like this guy here… twice. Don't ask. Won't hang it up until they force me to."

"Dr. MacKenzie?" the secretary's voice called out of the office. "I'm sorry for the delay, but the Chairman will see you now."

"I guess I have to go," Kenzie revealed as she picked up her brief. "It was nice to meet you Sergeant Jamie Reagan, and Rick… always a pleasure to wave you off. Will the two of you be at the Brashford tonight?" she questioned.

"Oh, Rick told me earlier he wouldn't miss that for the world," Jamie interjected before his travel companion could back out of the engagement. "We skipped lunch at our hotel because he was so eager to get over here and you know how much he loves to mingle with the suits."

"Right… well now I know why he brought you along," Kenzie smiled. "Something tells me I should take you back in there with me, but I guess maybe I'll run into you two gentlemen later. Until then… keep them up top, fellas," she offered with an exaggerated flip of her skirt while turning to make her way into the office.

"Damn, Rick… you're right. She's way out of your league," Jamie offered as his friend continued to stare at the door until it was fully closed.

"I never said she was out of my league, Reagan… just that I was married and not interested," Rick replied with a huff and a shake of the head as he turned heel and headed back on their original course towards the elevators.

"Well, now you're _not_ married and I get the feeling she's definitely interested," Jamie quipped as he sought to encourage the connection he felt in this little encounter if for no other reason than he sensed it had put Rick on the back foot, and there weren't too many things he imagined could do that. "And local now… what did she say? Research at Columbia Med for two years? Wonder what she's doing here?"

"Gotta be something interesting to tempt her away from the operating table and into an office… Kenz always had big ideas and wanted to find better ways to fix what was broken, but didn't always get respect she deserved from the brass… female surgeons in that world usually don't," he explained. "Slice, dice and ship 'em," he muttered. "That's all they wanted. Mostly patching kids with parts missing before they got airlifted stateside. She was always too focused on the job that landed in front of her to play the political games you need to work your way up the ladder... must have hit the glass ceiling with promotions before bugging out."

"Seems to remember you pretty well though," Jamie noted. "A clepto?" he prodded with an inquisitive tone.

"Alright, so I had a knack for picking up a few things out of her kit that could be useful in the field later," Rick admitted with a little smile while fingering the slim, perfectly balanced heavyweight pen that had somehow found its way into his jacket pocket in the Chairman's office when the secretary wasn't looking… old habits died hard. "I only ever lifted stuff that was necessary. You never know when something like that could come in handy," he added as he loosened his tie.

"Well, you can ask her all about it tonight," Jamie reminded with a smile. "I'll be sure to make myself scarce. Think you can handle it, big fella?" he smirked as the pair stepped in the elevator and turned around.

"Marines can handle anything," Rick grinned back as the doors closed. "'Cept her. OOOH-RAAA!"

###

"Eddie, honey… what do you mean the tech said there was nothing wrong with the battery?" Jamie questioned as he touched base with his wife while laying out his clothes on the bed in the hotel room before showering and getting ready to leave for the scheduled evening roundtable panel dinner mixer. "It either held a charge and started the car, or it didn't!" he replied with unconcealed frustration at the thought of his pregnant wife left stranded in the cold while their daughter was upset by the incident at school since the cat had been let out of the bag, so to speak in a bad pun sort of way, as soon as Kaylin had heard her daddy's voice on the phone.

"Jamie, I told you… the first time I got in today to take her to school it seemed like it was already drained, and then when I tried to go pick her up the engine didn't even try to turn over. When the guy came to check this afternoon, it started up right away. He even tested the keyless entry fob to see if that could be bad and cleaned all the connections. He said if it happens again they'll check for a parasitic drain or a short somewhere. I guess it was just one of those flukey things. Now please don't worry… everything is fine."

"Flukey because the damn thing uses more energy with all those gizmos than Yankee Stadium," Jamie griped as he hurled a tie and a pair of socks onto the bed from his suitcase. "And parasitic drain is code speak for 'I think you're nuts lady, and probably not smart enough to push the dummy button the right way'... for what we paid for that car... I don't want you sitting there all alone one night because it lets you down or God forbid something happens while you're driving it!"

"Jamison," Eddie warned before he could go further off on a tangent. "I know you're upset because you're there and we're here, but we're _fine,"_ she emphasized. "I'm a cop, remember? I can take care of myself. Kaylin had a little scare, but once we got home and she saw Bear was okay, she settled down. I handled it."

"By kicking the car and hurting yourself over another fluke thing, right?" he huffed.

"Honestly? Yeah," she insisted irritably. "Now how was your day?"

"Honestly? Flukey," he answered and then went on to explain about the meeting with Chairman Atwater and running into Charlotte MacKenzie in the lobby of his offices.

"So you think he's still carrying a torch for her?" Eddie asked after Jamie reported on Rick's reaction.

"Without a doubt… both of them," he admitted.

"Huh, then I bet you a large cheesesteak from Moller's food truck that you'll be cabbing it home alone from your dinner tonight," she added coyly. "Sounds like Rick might have someone more interesting to keep him company. Now, you're in a big city so make sure you're aware of your surroundings at all times, and look both ways before you cross the street," she chided while still a little miffed he had dressed her down like a child over the car incident earlier.

"Yes, dear," Jamie sighed and dropped his head as he conceded her point. "Sorry… sometimes I worry…"

"Too much…" she finished. "That you do Jamison Reagan, but you come by it honestly. I talked to Pop about everything today… with the munchie and Dexter," she admitted equally sheepishly as her resolve had flown out the window with one look from the older man. "You know his interrogation methods."

"Grilled cheese and soup?" Jamie questioned knowingly.

"Yup. Works every time doesn't it? Guess who walked me home, is downstairs ordering takeout and staying over tonight 'just in case' Kaylin and I need him?"

"That's good, lambchop," he breathed in relief as he sat down on the bed, missing her more than ever and longing to be home with his family. "Dad promised if this storm ramps up into a big Nor'easter like they're saying it will that we'll bug out of here early Friday morning to be safe… he's already put the plane on alert, so just tonight and one more whole day and I'll be home before that happens... Ed, I didn't want you to be alone after… well after what we heard about this week," he admitted. "And then today… that had to be tough with sweetness on top of everything else… she's come so far, but still slides backwards once in awhile. I'm glad Pop is with you, at least I've got Dad down here… you know, if I need to talk."

"Not like you'll go to him unless he forces it, but remember you've got me too," Eddie emphasized. "I'm right here, Jamie. I'm not going to break as long as I've got you… and Kaylin is fine, even after today... this baby is going to be fine… and we're all gonna be fine because we have each other, nothing is going to change that… I promise, okay? Now I've gotta go, the food is here and I'm starving. Call me later and give me the scoop on what happens with Rick, alright? I bet you'll owe me that steak. I love you Jamison Reagan."

"And I love you more, Edit Katalin."

* * *

 _So, Henry has ensured that Eddie is well-looked after in Jamie's absence, and we finally met Rick's infamous little crush Kenzie... hopefully she didn't disappoint as the good doc will soon become a focal character in this installment. Next, we'll get a better look at her take-charge personality after some dinner chat with the boys reveals exactly what her mission in New York is all about before things take a tragic turn when Mason Malevsky's plan to inflict a little extended psychological torture on Jamie, Eddie and the rest of the Reagan family goes upside down nearly from the start this time and our lovebirds will face some heartbreaking choices and a great deal of self-imposed guilt after an accident leaves them torn apart._

 _Another super long, important **Bonus-sized* chapter on tap as the action in this one ramps up._


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

 _March 14, 1:25 am_

 _Damn, this was getting hard._

" _Ed, baby… please… I need you. I promise to make it through this next hour, but you've gotta help me," Jamie pleaded out loud in the barest whisper after a glance at his watch left his arm in a painful spasm as cramps set in from the constant contractions. "Figure it out somehow… c'mon use those detective skills I know you have, lambchop. I don't know why they left and aren't coming back.. where do you think I am? You know I'm missing, right? Someone has to realize I'm still out here soon… you have to... I don't think I can wait until morning now…"_

 _Two-eighths. One quarter… the remainder seemed like it was a lifetime away…_

 _Jamie had successfully chunked off another hour in accordance to Quincy's directives, but now… now he was finding it hard to think and stay focused as despite his best intentions and continued movements, his core temperature had begun to dip and shock was setting in even as the pain had subsided just a bit… if he allowed that to continue and he started to perspire beyond his clothing's ability to wick the moisture away, well everything would spiral down beyond his control in short order._

 _Short, now that was funny considering who he was counting on right now he contemplated and let his mind wander. In Commander Joel Rigsby's world there was no such distinction as short. Jamie had been measured against his father's substantial six-four figure all of his life, and while Danny wasn't much taller, he had always been a more solid package whereas the youngest Reagan brother was forever described as slight in comparison… the runt of the family as it were. Even Joe and Erin had offered more height and looked as if they fit in while Jamie mirrored Mary's, and to some extent his grandfather's, more vertically unpretentious stature._

 _Ironically as of late, he had found himself virtually surrounded by short, feisty women… munchkins who took no prisoners in whatever quest they were on… Eddie at five-two had been a blond firecracker from that first night they'd met when she had torn away from the precinct like Mario Andretti on the way to their first 10-13 call together… that incident likely almost single-handedly behind the compulsion he had after that to take the wheel of the RMP whenever they were on duty together. Then there was the just slightly taller, but even slimmer, rookie officer Annabel Anderson who was cut from the same cloth, yet far easier to step back from and give directives to. In hindsight, Jamie had to admit that he and Eddie had acted like a married couple from sometime even before Renzulli had called him out about it on her first patrol anniversary. After that were his girls… Kaylin who lit up a room like no other despite her tiny form and the little one they were still waiting for, just skirting along on the lowest acceptable edge of those development charts like her older sister was whenever they got a glimpse on the ultrasound every few weeks now. Why was it so hard to believe she was healthy when he knew in his heart without a trace of a doubt that Kaylin was? They were the same, and yet very different. Perhaps when he could see and touch her and hear those strong first cries he was longing for that fear would be driven away… but first he had to make it that far. Eddie wasn't due to have their child for three more months, and right now he was being forced to chunk his existence down to a single hour at a time in order to survive the night. Three months was… well, twenty-four hours in a day, average of 30 days in a month, times three… equaled a crap load of hours that meant nothing if he didn't live to see the next one._

 _Which brought him to the last, and arguably most commanding small addition to his inner circle as of late. Charlotte MacKenzie had proven herself to be a tiny person with force beyond most others and a will to succeed that had demonstrated itself to be the greatest of equalizers as she faced off with medical peers and superiors of greater political stature alike to fight for her cause and the men and women she considered both her responsibility as patients and family at the same time. She reminded him of Rigsby and the Admiral's story about the tiny boat crew that out rowed all others in spite of being made up of all little guys… the munchkin team he had even called them with no one over five-five… one American Indian, one African American, one Polish American, one Greek American, one Italian American, and two tough kids from the mid-west. Surely Doc Kenzie would have been on that team leading the charge if she had been there._

 _They out paddled, out ran, and out swam all the other boat crews._

 _The big men on the other teams would always make good-natured fun of the tiny little flippers the munchkins put on their tiny little feet prior to every swim._

 _But somehow those little guys, from every corner of the nation, always had the last laugh... swimming faster than everyone and reaching the shore long before the rest. Nothing mattered but their will to succeed. Not their color, not their ethnic background, not their education and not their social status._

 **SEAL Rule 3: If you want to change the world, measure a person by the size of their heart, not the size of their flippers (or in this case Birkenstocks).**

* * *

"Hey, Pop… I'm heading out to that dinner. You staying in for the night?" Jamie questioned as a knowing wave to Frank's detail and a knock on the door allowed him entry into his father's more lavishly appointed suite at the hotel. "Oops, sorry to interrupt," he apologized after making his way inside to find his dad seated in the chair reading while Detective Abigail Baker was taking notes at the desk.

"Jamie, no it's alright. Come in," Frank assured as he looked up, relieved once more to see his son looking settled and in good spirits given the circumstances. "We were just going over the latest forecast and making some contingency plans for this damn storm that's developing faster than they thought. Looks like it will definitely make landfall off of Long Island early Saturday morning. They are talking blizzard conditions… several feet of snow and strong winds through Sunday night."

"Oh, well you better make sure the RMPs are loaded with extra sand and salt and the guys have blankets in the trunks… and... you already know all that," Jamie grinned sheepishly. "I guess I don't need to tell the Police Commissioner how to do his job."

"Not in this instance," Frank smiled through his thick mustache. "Everything okay at home?" he prodded. "Pop wasn't answering the phone at the house."

"He's staying over with Eddie and Kaylin tonight," Jamie admitted. "She… uh, talked to him earlier today," he added with a glance towards Baker, not wanting to get into personal family business in front of her. "So he decided to invite himself over for dinner."

"Understood," Frank nodded, relieved in his own way that his aging father was not alone and that he himself would not have to try to hide Eddie and Jamie's news from him as Henry was known to be as relentless as a hound dog when he was onto the scent of something.

"So, I guess I'll be going then… supposed to meet Rick down in the lobby. Last time I looked he was giving it to the hotel manager when he found out the fire suppression system didn't activate at first for that grill fire they had. I guess when it finally went off it doused the whole kitchen, and they had to throw out all the food. Did you get something to eat tonight? Want me to stop and bring supper back? I probably won't be out too late… this shindig is more like just appetizers and cocktails… it's supposed to wrap up early," he offered.

"We'll ordered in later," Frank answered with a nod towards Baker. "Too much business to take care of from here for the next few hours, but thanks. Enjoy your evening, Jamie. Check in when you get back for a nightcap. I'd like to hear how your meeting went this afternoon if you have a few minutes to spare for your proud old man," he encouraged so that he'd have a chance to talk to the boy alone to gauge his reaction to the events of the day.

"Okay, Dad," Jamie laughed. "I'll see you later. Detective Baker," he smiled with a polite nod to the Commissioner's ever efficient assistant before taking his leave.

"It seems like Jamie's trip is going well," Baker noted. "Chairman Atwater is one of the most influential Representatives in the House. He spoke to me personally last week to confirm their appointment and credentials with DCLM Miller. I doubt he does that for too many people. He's also a Harvard alum. Perhaps he's vetting him for other things."

"Jamie's mother always had the notion that he would end up on the fast track here in Washington, but that's not where the boy's heart lies," Frank answered. "Maybe if he had stayed in law, but he's found his niche back at home, and for that I'm grateful."

"Yes, sir," Baker smiled, knowing how important it was for Frank to have his children and their families near him.

"And given the fact that the mayor and commissioner in this town are no longer members of my personal fan club, it's probably for the best," Frank conceded as there had been a rather contentious open discussion between the men that afternoon at the policing symposium where they had locked horns over terroristic threat assessment.

"Noted, sir," Baker agreed with a nod of agreement. Frank Reagan could hold his own with anyone in a debate, but after today it was safe to assume he would not be invited to any friendly peer gatherings here in the nation's capital on this trip. "I'm sorry that you were not alerted to the Mayor Albright's published stance on that topic from earlier in the week."

"Well, that would be a matter for my DCPI, and right now I don't even see his stand-in," Frank barked. "Where is Weller, anyway? I haven't heard from him all afternoon. Did he forget to get off the plane or did he have somewhere more important to be, too?"

"Sir, he was one of the few people that were able to grab lunch downstairs before the fire. I've just been made aware that he's been in his room the last few hours complaining of stomach pain along with another woman from the mayor's staff. It's possible he could have picked something up from her since he was sitting in the same row behind us on the plane… it's Anne Wheeler, she's the other one who is sick, or there might have been some tainted food in the kitchen, but by this point everything was destroyed…"

"Enough," Frank halted her with his hand up as his temper flared once more. "I've heard enough. We'll deal with this issue back in the city. Something tells me this trip is going to shake things up at home and we need to do some housecleaning. I can't compromise the office and the reputation of my department by being sentimental anymore," he muttered the unveiled threat as Baker dropped her head knowing exactly what that meant while he went back to his report. "Let's just hope Jamie's evening and presentation tomorrow goes well so we can at least rack one up in the win column down here. Between this storm and everything else it looks like his old man is striking out."

###

"So who are you playing ball with now, Kenz?" Rick asked as he swirled the ice in his drink while the two sat alone at a table in one of the historic Brashford Hotel's more modest banquet halls for the small gathering. True to his word, Jamie had excused himself from the pair after a few minutes of polite conversation and wandered off to mingle elsewhere. "You didn't walk away from your commission without good reason, and I never saw you as the type."

"And what type is that, Rick?" Kenzie asked as she sipped her coffee… a lifelong aversion to alcohol seemingly unchanged. Although she had dressed a tad more formally for tonight's occasion, there was still a sense of free-spiritedness in the mosaic patterned design of her simple sheath dress and the damn closed front sensible heels she had forced herself into in an effort to improve upon her sixty-inch five-foot nothing frame, which she had always proudly pointed out was three inches taller than the Navy's minimum height listing.

"The type to be roaming through Washington with her hand out. You never played politics when you were in the Corps... all that mattered was fixing whatever got put in front of you, so why start now?"

"It wasn't enough anymore, and I'm not here looking for just money," she admitted. "It got to the point where I wasn't fixing them… saving their lives, maybe… but only so they could be sent somewhere else like broken dolls to a toy factory hoping they would have the right part to try to put them back together. I tried to get protocol changes so that some of these kids could keep what was theirs in the first place, but you know the old school mentality…"

"Slice, dice and ship," Rick agreed. "Yeah. Quick and dirty."

"Well, now there's new technologies," Kenzie added as her voice raised up an octave in excitement as she considered her own current situation. "Cutting edge stuff that can save limbs and make them functional again. I needed more. We were supposed to be the foremost trauma units in the world… our work on the lines was the basis for all these specialized centers in existence today, but there was no money for my research and I was drowning in red tape," she admitted. "Once I came off of deployment and Pittman got appointed to run the Naval Medical Research Center, I was screwed. We never exactly saw eye to eye after that little incident with the 2nd Battalion in Bahrain."

"You mean when you called him out in front of the whole 7th Marine Regiment during the air/ground task force crisis training debriefing?" Rick laughed. "No, I guess you wouldn't… that was the stuff of legends, though, Kenz. No one could believe you had the balls. I even heard about it here stateside after I'd been back… what? A couple of months?"

"Well he completely screwed up that TRAP mission simulation to rescue downed pilots… how the hell are you supposed to train for something like that by jumping out of a chopper parked in a hanger?… You need to do stuff like that out in the field where brownouts from the dust and sand interfere with communications and get in the wounds. That whole drill was a waste of time… but in hindsight it was not one of the shining moments in my career," she conceded with a small grin. "Hello, private sector four years ago, not too long after you put your papers in."

"So now what?"

"So now I hooked up with a mega dollar tech investor that's fully funding me for the next two," she revealed. "I've got a research clinic set up at Columbia studying techniques to improve outcomes in bone trauma, but so far all I'm doing is sweeping up after the broken toys… trying to fix and improve what's already been wrecked. What I really need is fresh traumas coming in following my protocols so I can show that it's working… my investor is even willing to foot the uninsured bills for their care. What I was trying to do here was have some cases funneled to me in New York instead of Bethesda providing they were willing to prep them way I need it, but no dice so far. You would think that they would do almost anything to get some of these surgeries off the books, but it's not happening. Too much risk I guess. I really wanted to help our boots out first, but it looks like I'll have to switch to civilian cases."

"Well it's not like New York isn't comparable to a war zone most days," Rick replied. "You'll get cases, trust me. What's this investor's stake in it?"

"Printing," Kenzie revealed. "His company designs high tech 3D bio printers."

"Bones?" Rick raised an eyebrow. "You said that's what you're focusing on. You can print them? Get the hell out, for real? But, wait… I thought they were already trying to do that?"

"With some smaller success, yes," Kenzie admitted. "But with just as many limitations, rejections and failures particularly in the long bones because of the marrow… I don't think we'll ever be able to replace them completely, gotta fix what's there. The ability to directly print porous scaffolds to mend bones with designed shape, controlled chemistry and interconnected porosity is the key, but no one has managed to develop a protocol that works to reliably recreate a patient's own tissue while the scaffold biodegrades so in the end they're just left with their own reformed bone with equal mechanical strength in load-bearing areas… until now," she added proudly. "It would have taken me forever alone, but with Oliver's basically unlimited financial support and resources we've got approval for testing a proprietary matrix which includes site specific growth factor and drug delivery abilities."

"You've done it? Kenz… that's amazing, especially in such a short time. This guy must know how to pull strings."

"That's his side of it, a patent would be worth hundreds of millions to his company so he was willing to take the risk… mine is making it work so I don't have to look another kid in the eye and tell him I couldn't save his arm or leg because too much was missing for me to put the pieces back together."

"Wow, so you haven't really changed then, have you?" Rick smirked as he sat back and admired the passion that practically radiated off this… and he had to admit it now that he could be honest… most beautiful woman. "Still looking after the kid on the table first and foremost."

"That's what keeps me up at night," she admitted. "Not too many on the table recently though… it's been more lab work for the last few years, but that changes when I get back to New York. I've got one… he's the last I took care of in Afghanistan and I guess you could say the straw that broke the camel's back. An IED blast left him missing half his femur. At that time there were no other options, so I took the leg, but they really butchered him when he got back here," she added angrily. "Bone infections and misfitted prosthetics… he's crippled and got even less than what I sent him away with. This kid… he was one of the SEALS I dropped in with and he's the one I can't forget. I swear to God I'm gonna put this right and get him to walk again if it's the last thing I do. Now… enough about my life," she redirected. "You were surprised to see me today… I've gotta admit it was the same here. Please tell me what on earth brought Rick Fellows to Washington DC with such a cute traveling companion," she asked with a nod towards Jamie who had been cornered by Chairman Atwater at the far side of the room once more.

"He's a cop and married to another one, Kenz," Rick sighed. "One daughter on the ground and another baby on the way."

"Well, no kidding," she replied with a smirk. "I see his ring, but you seem to be missing yours," she observed with maybe a touch of overt interest. "Thought you were in it for the long haul."

"I was, as long as we were apart more than together, I guess," he admitted. "It didn't work having me around the house all the time, so I joined the FDNY to keep busy and she divorced me and moved down to Houston to be with our daughter. I fly in a couple of times a year to visit… seems to be best for everyone involved," he admitted.

"DC is a long way from Houston," she prodded.

"Oh, well, Reagan… he's a do-gooder too, and happens to be the Police Commissioner's kid so he's got connections. Pulled him out of a couple of tight spots on the job, and he got me involved in this EDP commission of his for advice on how to handle things when they go south with some of the boys and girls… you know how to talk to them at those times. We've saved a few more than we lost because of it this year," he added proudly. "Got us invited down here to make a presentation tomorrow. No hands out though," he assured.

"That's really good work for you," Kenzie sat back and considered that point. "You always had the knack to convince those kids to hang on and not let go. They trusted you when you said you would get them out of there… not everyone has that," she added as her phone began to buzz. "Oh, crap… I've gotta take this. It's my lab and they're prepping the materials for that surgery I told you about so it might take awhile. We took a bone graft yesterday before I left. I'll probably have to go back to my hotel and get online to make sure they have a handle on it. You got a pen? Here's my cell number," she advised as she wrote the information down on the back of a cocktail napkin with the perfectly balanced heavyweight pen Rick produced from his jacket pocket. "Representative Alan Atwater," she smirked as she spun it around to show him the engraving. "Some things never change, Corpsman Fellows."

"No they don't, Kenz. You never know when something like that might come in handy."

"Well, I still like Thai if you ever get the urge back in the city. I'm due to fly out tomorrow morning. It was good to see you again, Rick."

"Likewise, Kenz," Rick offered as he watched her get up with a smile and rush off before finishing the last sip of his drink. _Same old Kenzie,_ he thought. _Always focused on the job._

"Please tell me you at least got her number before she ran out of here like a bat out of hell," Jamie smirked as he walked up behind and placed another scotch down on the table. "This is either to congratulate or commiserate," he added with a nod.

"She had a patient," Rick defended. "But I did get her number," he added with a self-satisfied grin as he waved the napkin for evidence and put it in his pocket for safekeeping. "And a dinner invitation thanks to you when we get back home."

"Well, way to go there, Smokey!" Jamie laughed as he clapped him on the back. "Glad to be of service for once. Eddie bet me that I would be cabbing it home alone tonight though, guess we didn't get that far… but there's progress!"

"God, we are back in high school," Rick muttered as he rolled his eyes and stood up. "C'mon, let's get out of here. I need a walk and some fresh air after being stuck in a damn plane with Typhoid Annie and stuffy offices all day. Our hotel is just a couple of miles from here, we don't need an effing cab. Let's hoof it."

"Whatever you say," Jamie grinned. "I think there's something else you need to walk off after that little conversation though. Wait..." he added as an object caught his attention while it was also being put away in a coat pocket. "Isn't that the Chairman's pen?"

###

"I said walk, Reagan… not go on a damn shopping spree," Rick griped as he begrudgingly carried a plastic bag with a roll of heavy Christmas wrapping paper, scissors and tape inside. "Do I look like Martha Stewart? Besides, couldn't you just buy the stuff? Does it have to be wrapped before you take it home? What are you, a girl?"

"Hey, it was your idea to go patrol the perimeter or whatever it is we're doing out here tonight," Jamie defended as he was likewise lugging a couple shopping bags. "I just picked up a few things for Eddie and Kaylin while we were down here, and yes… they have to be wrapped. Ed's worse than a kid when it comes to that stuff… it's like she has radar for presents. If I try to take it in the house otherwise I can never surprise her," he added. "Besides, we're just a couple of blocks or so away from the hotel. You were the big man that decided to hoof it despite the fact that it's like twenty degrees out. I was just trying to get warm by walking in those stores. I hate the cold anymore, and look," he motioned to the near empty street devoid of almost all other pedestrians "No one else is as stupid as we are right now. They're all inside."

"You hate the cold," Rick replied, shaking his head. "Wait until you get a few more years on you and a couple metal plates holding your parts together. Do me a favor and stay out of flooded basements this year when it's two degrees out," he added, referring to the rescue at the Bridgewater building collapse the previous winter which had left Jamie trapped under rubble and severely hypothermic while his rescue buddy pulled out all the stops to save him. "Whatever happened to George? Is he still seeing that cute respiratory therapist at St. Vic's you went out with?"

"Addie? Yeah… they're supposed to take a trip out to Red Rocks in Arizona sometime soon from what Dad said," Jamie admitted as they trudged along, their breaths showing in the crisp nighttime December air that had just the first hint of bite to it and the promise of a big approaching storm. "I think he's about to pop the question."

"Now there's a place I'd love to retire to," Rick admitted. "Hot all the time, gorgeous desert and plenty of places to hike through and get away from it all. Might have to put that on my bucket list," he admitted.

"You'll be a hundred years old before you're ready to quit and get to all those things on that list," Jamie kidded as his phone began to ring and he had to juggle around his new possessions to free a hand to pull it out of his pocket. "Ed… radar, see? I told you," he pointed out before answering. "Hey, honey."

"So?" she demanded. "You were supposed to call me back and tell me what happened. Did Rick and this lady doctor hook up? Did he ditch you? Did I win the bet?"

"No, lambchop… sorry. You're gonna have to skip the cheesesteak for now… he did get her number but she ditched _him_ for work," Jamie teased with a big smile as Rick huffed back at him in disgust. "Besides, didn't you learn your lesson with your mother's paprikash? That kind of crap comes back to haunt you now. You'd better stay away from it… it's not good for the baby."

"Jamie…" Eddie stood up from the final box of decorations she was rummaging through while Henry was keeping Kaylin occupied with a game of her favored match cards out in the kitchen. "I was kind of thinking about that today," she admitted in a guilty low voice as she hobbled over on her bruised foot to the foyer for more privacy. "Could that be why… I mean I don't eat the greatest stuff all the time and we were drunk on tequila that night when…"

"No," Jamie cut in immediately while stopping in his tracks and waving Rick on when his companion did likewise. "I'll catch up with you in the lobby," he motioned as he sought the space to talk to Eddie alone. Despite his close relationship with Rick, bringing up the baby's issues in front of him was a place he didn't want to go. "Ed, honey…" he continued as he watched his travel buddy approach the intersection at the corner of the hotel and scurry across the crosswalk at the end of the light change. "Honey, all the research I did last night said neither hydronephrosis nor its underlying causes have been linked to anything parents did during pregnancy. In short, there is nothing you or I could have done to cause this condition and it doesn't run in families, okay? Please don't worry about that. There's no known risk factors, except that boys are four-to-five times more likely to be born with it than girls are," he smiled as the wind picked up and he felt a sudden chill down his back reminiscent of that sixth sense feeling for danger he usually got, but his mind was solidly focused on his wife at the moment so he ignored it. "I wasn't going to mention that, but I'm liking those odds, lambchop. Can I call you back in a minute? It's freezing out here and I'm just across the street from the hotel," he explained as he re-juggled his bags while stepping forward into the crosswalk as the white light signaled it was safe.

"Jamie, I just wanted to be sure," Eddie insisted as she refused his request and he stayed on the line with a sigh while crossing the street. "Besides, with those odds you're going to owe me a Hawaiian vacation when this baby girl pops out."

"Alright, Ed… you're on. We'll find out for sure about that in about six weeks, okay…" he laughed and trailed off as his eyes snapped over at the car approaching with speed on the opposite side of the intersection, its lights flashing over the bumps as the driver gunned the engine and shot through the crosswalk against the red light while Jamie uncharacteristically hesitated at the somehow familiar outline of the man behind the wheel and the sight of the blue '71 Chevelle SS, identical to the one he had inherited from Joe after his brother had died and his father decided to pass the car on to him.

What followed next erased almost all of those thoughts and nearly everything else from Jamison Reagan's mind as despite strict orders from his father to use the vehicle and mask only to spook Jamie with a near-miss and launch his game plan to haunt the Reagans for a time with a familiar connection to the Blue Templar's past, Matthew Malevsky erred in his timing as he misjudged the speed at which Jamie would cross the street, instead leaving behind a heavy, crunching repulsive thud in his wake as he clipped his intended target solidly with the right front fender before spinning him halfway around for a second impact near the passenger-side door where it met the windshield to send him sprawling face down on the pavement.

Bits of broken glass surrounding him on the ground were the only physical reminder of the once beloved Chevelle that had been totalled years ago when he was a rookie and had been forced to run into a concrete barrier by the river when the brake lines were cut by Sonny after he'd been targeted by the Blue Templar, the group that been responsible for his brother's death. With no funds to restore it from the heavy damage it suffered it had eventually been sold it at auction for parts, but there was no recognition in Jamie's eyes any longer as the red taillights from the car reflected in them before they slowly drifted closed while it blew through the next light and sped off into the darkness of the street in a cloud of lingering exhaust.

For that exquisitely long and short instant there was only the sensation of white light and Joe.

* * *

 _Oh, yes I did... and do feel just a *little* badly about it. I've been flirting with hurting our boy seriously throughout this second series, but he's always managed to get off fairly unscathed in short order in spite of repelling accidents, collapsing buildings, revenge-bent psychopaths with poor eyesight and even flying frying pans. For reasons that will become apparent later as this third and final installment closes things out for this leg of our repeated journey, it was necessary to pull the big guns, or at least the Chevelle as it were, out now._

Next, we'll begin to find out what the life-changing impact of this… well, impact might be, and there will be plenty of angst and guilt to follow while things play out to their eventual conclusion months from now on a hillside near that bridge over the river where the final showdown between the Malevskys and Reagans will happen once more. Coming up in the next few chapters, Rick pulls out all the stops for his good friend even as Frank finds some things taken out of his own hands and Eddie faces some impossible decisions that need to be made from afar and will no doubt haunt her as she second-guesses herself, all while a certain aggrieved father sees his carefully planned scheme taken off the tracks before he was really ready to go there.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

Jamison Reagan had no comprehension of what had occurred for moments after that sickening combination of blows sent him flying in the opposing direction of the last impact, his now badly broken body coming to rest yards away in the cold dark street with a second similar, but more muted drumming. Instead he felt, rather than saw, the color white push away the blue and envelop him like a tsunami rushing through and overtaking his consciousness while washing all other thoughts and feelings away from its path until for several blissful seconds it was the only thing that remained except for one other comforting vision.

For that exquisitely long and short instant there was only the sensation of white light and Joe.

Had Jamie been aware of noise at that point, he would have heard the honking of horns following the terribly loud screech of rubber on pavement as the next driver sought to avoid the actions of the first and stopped in time before compounding the tragedy. He might have perceived the frantic thudding of shoes on the ground or the slew of four-letter words and f-bombs that his friend Rick Fellows offered as he rushed over to kneel down by his side and assess the extensive damage on autopilot as his years of combat medic training and experience kicked in.

Had his normal thought process been intact, he might have wondered what Eddie was thinking back in their beautiful home in New York in that moment where she was standing amid boxes of Christmas decorations and staring at the device in her hand after the comforting sound of his laugh had been replaced by something guttural and indistinguishable before the line had gone tellingly dead, leaving her puzzled initially and then frantic when repeated attempts to call him back went unanswered and directly to voicemail. He would have worried about that precious baby inside her that the two of them had just discovered might need added attention and the sensitive little three-year-old girl who had heard the tone in her mother's voice and had rushed over from where she was playing cards with her great-grandfather to cling to her. He might have even thought about their beloved cat and the fact that it was now his and Kaylin's duty to tend to him since Eddie was pregnant and there was that thing with his litter box she had to be careful of.

Had he realized where he was, he might have considered the fact that his own father had been relaxing after a day of travel and high-powered meetings by reading the paper while sitting in a lavish hotel room that was only three stories straight up and facing the street where he now lay... a father that had just rushed over to the window to pull the heavy drapes back and assess the scene beneath him after hearing the cacophony of car horns beneath him, having no way of knowing in that moment of course that it was his own son down there currently being surrounded by onlookers as multiple calls to 911 were being dispatched… that was of course until later when a frantic one would come in on his own phone from Abigail Baker who was witnessing the aftermath of everything... having been only yards behind Jamie and Rick on their return path from the impromptu Christmas shopping spree, those small purchases now scattered about and unimportant in the road.

Had he known the heavy impact this... well, this _impact_ would have on his future and chosen career he might have considered the ramifications for both himself and his family, but this was not the time to be thinking about that, because frankly, he couldn't.

Instead, Jamison Reagan was blissfully unaware of any of those things or the fact that his very life was now just tenuously clinging onto itself for a quiet few moments as he lay utterly still and crumpled with multiple broken ribs and a lacerated spleen on the left side from where he was struck solidly by the side of the car before being thrown down next to the curb and a right leg that was mangled and twisted into several unholy directions at the same time while he was bleeding profusely through the tears in the muscle, major blood vessels and skin that now left shards of bone protruding and his previously crisp and clean suit pants torn and stained red.

He remained unaware while he existed drifting through a fragile envelope between life and death surrounded by the color of white light and a vision of Joe.

Until that was suddenly gone… and he gasped and stiffened involuntarily as it was replaced by a reverse wave of agonizing red-hot pain that swept back through him in the next instant like the tide going out and dragging with it any feeling of peace or comfort that might have remained as Rick had assessed the external injuries and carefully rolled him on his back before quickly clamping a tourniquet down unmercifully on Jamie's thigh just above the highest obvious break… one he had immediately fabricated by tearing off his necktie and twisting it over that lifted pen he had pulled from his pocket… he was right, you never knew when something like that would come in handy.

"Stop… R-rick…" came the pleading somewhat disconnected rasp as Jamie tried to push himself away to no avail, his left arm weak and unable to do his bidding, that same sided-leg gaining no purchase on the slick pavement. "You're h-hurting… me... I don't w-want…."

"Can't do that, bud! Good to see you're talking, now stay with me, Reagan! Just be still, you're not going anywhere!" Rick demanded while his eyes shifted around the immediate area looking for anything he could use in lieu of a proper medical kit to keep his friend among the living until one arrived. He settled on that bag he'd dropped near the hotel entrance with the Christmas wrapping Jamie had purchased for Eddie and Kaylin… the cellophane paper around that sturdy thick cardboard tube with a pair of sharp new scissors inside, just as someone slid to the ground alongside of him with a gasp and a touch on his shoulder.

"Jamie!" Detective Abigail Baker cried as she took in the awful bloodied sight before her and that first responder training immediately kicked in even as her stomach twisted and she took his shaking hand in her grasp. "Oh no, Rick! I was just down the street. What's happened?! Jamie, please hang on! I'm going to get your father here right now! I can't believe this…"

"GODDAMNED CAR MUST HAVE COME OUT OF NOWHERE!" Rick cursed as he acknowledged her even as his free hand was searching for other injuries and running down his friend's body. "DAMN IT! Broken ribs on the left side… lots of them… gonna have a pneumothorax and internal bleeding or the Pope isn't Catholic… had my back to the effing thing, never even saw it before I turned around! CHRIST! No one else on the ENTIRE EFFING STREET, and he runs Reagan down before the light changed!"

"Wait… what hap'ned?…" came a gasping question from below. "Hurts down here…. I c-can't see it," Jamie added as he weakly reached down towards his thigh, this time with his still mobile right hand.

"No, nuh uh," Rick stopped him before he could touch anything and further contaminate it as he pushed Jamie's hand aside. "You were hit by a car, Reagan. I'm looking at some kind of broken leg here so no more dancing for you tonight, but we're gonna get you to the hospital… you'll be fine. I've seen guys walking down the street after the St. Patty's Day parade looking worse than this," Rick spoke loudly and lied through his teeth, practicing that knack for talking to downed vics he was famous for.

"I heard it from down the block… I was there to pick up some food, ours wasn't delivered... but I never thought... God! What can I do to help?" Abigail begged even as she was pulling out her phone and hitting the first speed dial number on her list… the one that went directly to the Police Commissioner himself.

"Hold this right here and keep it tight," Rick ordered as he took her hand and placed it on the tourniquet before getting up and running to retrieve that bag. "He's gonna go into shock. Talk to him and keep him with us!" he called back over his shoulder.

"I'm so sorry," Baker tried to soothe even as she kneeled on the cold, hard ground beside Jamie and started to slip out of her heavy wool overcoat while still clutching the phone that was returning a frustrating busy signal now as she was trying to reach her boss. "Here, let's keep you warm," she offered while she managed to shimmy out of the garment and tried to cover his upper body.

"I'm okay…. I've g-gotta go… h-home," Jamie insisted as his mind disconnected once more and despite his injuries he tried forcefully to push himself off the ground with his right arm. "Snows coming… the baby, it's w-wrong… s-she said… Ed needs h-help."

"NO, NO, NO!" Baker and Rick cried in unison as he returned and the sudden movement did nothing more than send Jamie back down to the ground reeling in pain as Abigail's grip on the now wet and slick metal pen slipped and evenly spaced waves of alarming torrents of bright red blood flooded the fabric around his leg once more as the tourniquet loosened.

"Damn it! This is femoral," Rick revealed grimly as he quickly readjusted and pulled the fabric tight again. "Looks like one of the lower branches to his artery may have been transected by the bone fragment. We need to stop him from moving, stabilize the fracture and control this or he'll bleed out and it won't take long… it's gonna compromise the circulation to the rest of his leg though. We've got an open fracture… it's gotta stay clean," he muttered out loud as his mind was whirring on fast-forward, knowing that obvious cinder and gritty dirty contamination from the wet roadway that was now ground into the wound was only further enhancing the serious risk of infection… if they got that far. "Kneel on his shoulders here if you have to, but keep him down with his head and neck straight and watch those ribs on the other side!" he ordered as Baker put her phone down on the pavement and did as she was told using the rest of her strength to hold him still. "WHERE THE HELL IS EMS?" he yelled out to the surrounding onlookers. "SOMEBODY GET THESE CARS MOVED OUT OF THE WAY SO THE EFFING AMBULANCE CAN GET IN HERE! Does anyone have a first aid kit in their car? I need some sterile dressings!"

"I have one!" a middle-aged woman cried as she came close and handed Rick a little zip bag with one tiny pad of gauze and about ten regular band-aids that could be picked up in the checkout aisle of any grocery store. "Here."

"SERIOUSLY, LADY?!" he barked and chucked it back at her with no regard for the appalled look that was returned. "Does that look like it will help _this?!_ An effing band-aid?! Someone run into the hotel and grab some clean towels!" he ordered even as his hand was moving up Jamie's leg cutting the pants off and forming strips with those luckily just-purchased sharp Martha Stewart-type scissors. "Damn, Reagan. Sorry to do this to you bud," his voice softened once more as he tended to him. "This was a mighty fine suit, too. I don't want to see a bill for it when this is over. Now, it's gonna hurt like hell but I hafta straighten this out a little and tie you off the best I can without actual traction," he explained as he prepared to splint the most obvious fracture using the heavy Christmas wrap and the strips of cloth from the mangled pants. "Good thing you didn't go cheap on me," he added as he slipped the full sturdy, heavy roll into place the full length alongside Jamie's leg. "WHERE THE HELL IS THAT MEDIC UNIT?! We need packing, fluids, pain control and a real traction splint or he's gonna end up losing this…"

"Rick, I wanna go home," Jamie begged softly… sounding almost coherent at first as the blood loss and shock had settled his body down heavy on the ground now and sent his mixed-up mind longing to go back to another time so much like this one when he had found himself safely laying on the side of the road with traffic stopped all around and there was no excruciating pain to be felt. "Please…"

"I know, buddy, but you were hit by a car," Rick reiterated, knowing that the trauma from the situation or a possible concussion was likely just playing short-term memory games with his friend… something he saw on the job frequently with injured victims. "You're hurt, but we're gonna get you help okay? We'll have you home with Eddie and Kaylin soon, don't worry," he tried to reassure once more.

"Jamie, do you remember anything about the accident?" Baker asked as she continued to hold his hand, hoping to keep him engaged and squeeze some valuable information out of him while they had a chance, her detective brain searching for something to go on since she herself had not witnessed anything useful and it was obvious he would be unavailable for some time once he faded or help arrived and pumped him full of the drugs he urgently needed at this point.

"Joe's car…" Jamie rasped as he stared blankly straight up trying to comprehend why her familiar blond countenance was peering back at him upside down while the two similar events merged in his thoughts. "He came to get me and said I didn't have to... stay… he knew, I couldn't do it anymore… I could come back home with him…"

"Oh, no!" Baker cried as she renewed her efforts to grab her phone and call Frank, not knowing that the sight of that blue Chevelle and the familiar outline of the driver had Jamie flashing back to the close call he'd had in traffic after returning to Harvard for classes once Mary had passed so suddenly... a sleepwalking jaunt that had nearly ended this same way had it not been for an alert driver and his good friend Spencer tackling him to the sidewalk at the last second. "He's talking about his…"

"Yeah, I know," Rick acknowledged before becoming forcefully loud once more to get Jamie's attention back. "HEY, REAGAN! YOU'RE NOT LISTENING TO ANYONE BUT ME RIGHT NOW. GOT IT? Now hold him tight," he warned the commissioner's assistant before grimacing as a quick movement left his friend crying out in renewed agony, but in clearer focus with his mind fully back in the present as his leg was shifted straighter.

"OOOW, SHIT!" Jamie struggled to no avail once more as Baker had been ready for him. "Oh, God, Rick... that hurts!… Don't!... I can't stand it, please… you've gotta stop. Get the eff 'way!"

"Not happening, okay? That's gonna help, bud... I know it hurts like hell and you hate me right now, just hang in there until we can get some good drugs in you," Rick cajoled as he quickly secured the upper leg to the greatest length he could on the roll with a series of tied off fabric strips even as the injured muscles contracted against it. "Now where else are you in pain? Above the knee, I know I just made it feel worse… c'mon, Reagan, sitrep. I gotta do this… focus for me. Once they juice you up you won't care about any of this. I promise I'm gonna get you all the help and pretty nurses you need to take your mind off this. Now what else? Your head? Neck? Back?"

"Not... s-so much…" Jamie began to wheeze as he tried to comply, having taken unintentional deep breaths after that last move. "Left side, shoulder... belly… ribs worst after that..."

"Okay, you're doing good, bud," Rick encouraged as he continued to evaluate. "Stay with us here. You feel this?" he asked with a sharp dig down low on his friend's mangled leg which offered no response while a duplicate action on the seemingly uninjured left side caused an immediate flinch.

"Yeah… that."

"Good deal…" Rick deflected. "Not surprising, that's why he isn't complaining about it," he muttered the last part under his breath. "Baker, I need your scarf," he added out loud before reaching over to pulled the dressy silk cloth from her neck while using one of the retrieved hotel towels to clean the most egregious bits of dirt from the edges of the wound before applying the cellophane he had snagged from the wrapping paper roll, followed by a clean towel and then several tight wraps of the fabric knotted over that with Jamie's lost shoe that had been laying next to them in the gutter jammed up in the back of the leg with the sole out to provide leverage to pull the strong silky material taught while still allowing what he hoped would be enough give for some blood flow to continue anteriorly down to the lower leg. "We're gonna try to control this with direct pressure instead," he explained as he said a prayer that this contraption would work and slowly released the tourniquet above. Some bleeding was immediately evident through the white towel, but no longer gushing uncontrolled and he heaved a sigh of relief as he felt for and found a weak pulse down near the ankle even as it's twisted location told him it was probable they were looking at closed fractures to both bones below the knee as well. "Okay, we're in business now," he sighed. "If we have to we can alternate by putting the pen back here and tightening on and off, but he's gotta have some circulation down there," he explained as Baker nodded. "Now get the Commissioner here fast and see if MAYBE HE CAN GET A GODDAMN BUS WITH SOME ACTUAL MEDICAL SUPPLIES TO SHOW UP IN THIS EFFING TOWN!" he added to no one in particular even as relief swept over him at the sight of approaching flashing lights.

"Please, please, please… sir, pick up now," Baker pleaded as she fumbled with her phone in her now bloodied right hand, intending to dial once more while continuing to be mindful of Jamie's head and neck even as the device rang to life on its own.

* * *

 _Well, it wasn't my intention to break this section when I first drafted it, but it ran overly long for a single chapter as so many have seemed to do lately, so we'll have to wait until the next one for Frank's reaction as he learns that the minor traffic accident outside the hotel he'd been initially informed about is anything but that while Rick and Baker continue their efforts to keep Jamie with them while they wait for help to arrive as both time and a certain FDNY man's temper grow short._


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

"Abigail, where are you?" Frank barked immediately when she answered as he had seen her missed call notification. "There was a car accident or something in front of the hotel. I can't quite make it out. Jimmy said we should sit tight up here in case it's some kind of ruse. Are you in the area? I just got off the phone with Eddie… she called and said that Jamie dropped the line when he was talking to her on his way back, and his phone is just going to voicemail now. Is he busy helping out? I told her he was on a scene and not to worry. She seems pretty upset… he needs to call her back immediately."

"Frank, no it's…" Baker struggled to maintain the professionalism in her voice even as her heart broke at the revelation that Eddie had been speaking to her husband when all of this occurred. "I'm so sorry, sir… it _is_ Jamie. He's been struck by a car that ran the light… evidently a hit and run. I'm here with Rick helping him… we need you to come down right away. The police have just arrived," she informed as a quick look showed a single squad car pulling in. "But there's no EMS unit yet. It's… it's urgent they get here soon, sir," she added with deep regret.

"WHAT?!" Frank stuttered as his mind tried to come up to speed with that unexpected information even as his heart fell and he turned back around to the window in disbelief, the thought never occurring to him before that he had been standing in his room impotently while it was one of his own down there… having been advised it was a minor car accident and to sit tight by the most trusted man in his detail with the realities of threats against someone in his position outweighing his ingrained sense of duty in this situation… his own son laying in the street... " _He's been WHAT?_ Abigail, is he…?"

"Hurt… badly… semi-conscious in and out, but he's been mostly awake and talking the whole time, sir… a broken leg at least and he was bleeding heavily. Rick's controlled that for the moment… he says there also might be some ribs fractured and internal injuries. Sir, we need the medics here, there's no sign of them yet… he's in a great deal of pain and there's nothing else we can do for him."

"Oh my… Son of a bitch! Abby, please tell him to hold on! I'm on my way down now!" Frank cursed, flustered and informal as he hung up the phone and then stared at it, hesitating uncharacteristically for several seconds as his heart was pounding while he viewed Eddie's number on his recent call list, before deciding against clicking on it until he had assessed the situation personally. He instead rushed to the door, grabbing his overcoat on the way through and barking orders to his detail posted outside as they jumped to their feet to follow their boss while he ran down the hall towards the elevator at a speed they had not witnessed before.

"I'm sorry, sir... I had no idea," Detective Jimmy Nucifero apologized profusely as he joined Frank in the car before the doors closed. "I assumed Baker would check since she was out… I should have sent a man down there immediately."

"It's not your fault, Jimmy," Frank replied evenly as he struggled to regain his composure all the while cursing the fact that there was no DCPI available to task with assuring that his son received all consideration for medical care since it seemed like his assistant was wholly occupied providing that with Rick at the moment. "I need you to be involved on scene. Baker said the emergency response has been slow. Jamie needs every advantage forthwith."

"Understood, sir," Detective Nucifero replied even as he whipped out his own phone and started connecting with his counterparts in the MPDC while the doors opened and he maintained vigilance as the entourage rushed through the front doors and into the street with Frank keeping his pace as he and his men pushed unceremoniously through the growing crowd from emerging from inside the hotel to reach the two familiar figures now huddled over the prone, covered form in the street… the worst of it hidden under Rick and Baker's coats for now as they sought to keep Jamie warm on the cold hard ground even as he slipped closer to unconsciousness in spite of their best efforts.

"Jamie…" Frank started as he gingerly got down on one knee with some knowing assistance from Jimmy, years on the streets running down perps coming back to haunt him a little now as the time passed. "Son, c'mon look at me... I MEAN RIGHT NOW!" he ordered more forcibly at the end as he reached for his youngest's hand where it lay limp and cold aside of him, willing him to warm and rally as he covered it with his own. "Is he…?" was the question directed with a quick glance at Rick when there was no immediate response.

"M'm here," came the quiet answer with a small reassuring squeeze as the hazel eyes obediently blinked slowly open to half-mast. "M'm really tired, Dad. Hurts bad," he labored. "Ed needs help with Kaylin and the baby… it's not right… where... is she?" he asked as confusion was starting to settle back in and he was still valiantly fighting it, but drifting away nonetheless.

"Sir, the EMS unit is two minutes out," Nucifero informed over his shoulder. "Emergency traffic signal systems and cameras in this sector have been offline for the last few hours due to a computer glitch… they've had trouble getting through the intersections, it's gridlock now. MPDC will clear the path with an escort to the hospital once they're ready to transport. Be advised with traffic conditions at this time it's a thirty-five minute ETA to MercyStar West Trauma," he added very quietly. "Closest Level I."

"Did you hear that?" Frank tried to hearten as he sensed his youngest was fading and he shook his head at the fact that just a few hours ago he had remarked to himself how well the boy was in spite of difficult circumstances. How could things have changed this fast? "Just two more minutes, Jamie," he emphasized the positive with his commanding yet assuring tone that had been imprinted on all of his children's hearts since the moment they were born… the one that was intended to make them believe all was well and under control when it was anything but that.

"Sir, he's been very concerned about Eddie. I believe they were talking when…" Baker informed with a knowing nod to Jamie's condition.

"We'll get her down here tonight…" Frank promised immediately, knowing that his new daughter-in-law would be asked for consent to whatever her husband would need in the way of medical intervention. "Jamie, I'll call her as soon as you're taken care of and have someone drive her, and there's no need to worry about her or that baby… everything will be fine and you've got plenty of time to heal up before that. Pop and I are the ones that have to be worried about keeping up with another grandchild. Kaylin gives us a run for our money now. These knees aren't what they used to be, son, but I'll be damned if I won't be bouncing that new baby on them come June."

"M'm sorry… was my fault… t-tell her… love th'm," he whispered before slipping away from them, back into that white place although low involuntary moans of pain remained audible with every breath as his broken ribs and bruised lung began to take their own toll on his efforts.

"Jamie, you'll tell them yourself... JAMIE!" Frank yelled back down as the grip on his hand went away even as Rick jumped in to try to rouse his friend which proved to be unsuccessful.

"C'MON, REAGAN!" he yelled with no outward response. "It's no good, sir… he's decompensating. His pressure is dropping, and he needs fluids and meds, NOW," Rick added with emphasis as he pulled back the coat to check on Jamie's leg as Frank stared at the obviously mangled limb, and despite his experience at hundreds if not thousands of accident scenes over the years he felt his stomach churn dangerously at the sight, even as the rescue man's eyes lifted in relief as the much needed EMS rig was directed in by the slowly growing throng of uniformed officers on scene. "WELL IT'S ABOUT DAMN TIME!" he griped as he watched the medics step out, grab their bags and run over.

"What's this? Amateur hour?" the first to arrive demanded as he kneeled down before opening his box and taking a stethoscope out. "Christmas paper? What the hell kind of training do you have? You some kind of special Secret Santa?" he quipped until that cocky snark was almost instantly nullified as the specter of an angry Marine doc went directly to the nuclear option as he rose to the forefront and chopped this neophyte down at the ankles.

"I'm an amateur? FOURTEEN MINUTES AND TWENTY-FIVE GODDAMN SECONDS IT TOOK YOU TO GET HERE!" Rick railed and his voice raised as he refused to be pushed out of the way even as Baker moved to the side and slipped her hand onto Frank's arm to steady him and help him rise so the medics had room to work. "WHAT THE EFFING HELL KIND OF TRAINING DO I HAVE?! Enough to keep him alive with nothing for that long! WHAT? Did you stop for a crème caramel latte on the way over here? This guy could have bled out in the meantime… TWICE!" he thundered and began barking out information and orders. "Let me save you the time and trouble! Open femur fracture, comminuted from the looks of it. Femoral vascular involvement, transected the second or third branch. Probable tib-fib plane fracture with neuro deficits below the knee. Broken ribs palpable on left, at least five and low, possible flailed chest. Guarding and tenderness with evident bruising… left shoulder pain so I'm betting spleen, maybe liver. Now, you get two large-bore IVs going and put him on a hundred percent, non rebreather. He needs a traction splint NOW before he bleeds out any further into that leg, and then we're gonna get him on a board and into the bus! Wound's contaminated… we need betadine and sterile pads over the fracture… palpable weak foot pulse alternating pressure…" Rick proceeded to spout out directions in a commanding tone that left little doubt who was in charge as he continued to intimidate the medic team and maintained control over the scene while Baker stood nearby keeping her grasp on Frank, who in truth was as much of a father figure to her as a boss, while he could only stare back dumbfounded at the large stain of blood left behind on the ground… his son's blood, and a lot of it... while Jamie was quickly packaged for transport.

"Rick will see to it he's taken care of, sir," she tried to assure as she knowingly pulled him away from that sight, careful to keep from marking his coat with red herself as she grabbed a discarded towel to wipe her hands and they watched from another angle while the gurney was loaded into the bus and their colleague from New York was quick to crawl inside of it without an invitation. "Jimmy has a car waiting," she added and began to guide him over to it, pushing him in the backseat and taking her place next to him.

"Baker, I didn't even ask him what we were looking at with… that leg… I couldn't do anything for him…" Frank stumbled in his thoughts even as he became aware she was shivering beside him, having unselfishly covered Jamie in her own coat while remaining with him in the freezing weather. "Here," he offered as he immediately removed his own and wrapped it around his assistant. "Thank you for helping Rick take care of my son," he added gratefully even as he felt his own unease growing as the so-called 'Golden Hour' for trauma victims was quickly starting to wane. A thirty-five minute transport would put Jamie on the edge of that critical time.

"Sir, MPDC has advised heading to Capital Regional instead. It's approximately ten minutes and a Level III joint military hospital, but they have an orthopedic surgeon on call if needed," Detective Nucifero informed as he appeared at the window even as the ambulance doors were being closed and the EMS unit was preparing to pull out. "There's an accident on the Beltway. No way through on the ground to MercyStar. They'll airlift from there if necessary once he's stable."

"Jimmy, you stay here," Frank ordered gruffly, even as he glanced back to see the broken glass, blood and supplies still littering the place where Jamie's body had come to rest after being struck by a vehicle he couldn't even remember if anyone had identified yet. "Damn patrol hasn't even secured the scene yet! They could be losing key witnesses and evidence!" he observed in anger. "GET A DETECTIVE HERE AND TELL THEM I WANT THE SON OF A BITCH THAT DID THIS TO MY BOY FOUND!" he barked as the car pulled away and he took a deep breath while the window was automatically rolled up by his driver as he reached for his phone once more.

"Sir, would you like me to…" Baker offered, knowing how difficult the next act would be for her boss.

"Abigail, no… I have to be the one to tell her," he breathed heavily as he looked sadly at the device in his hands and paused for several more moments as they sped through the streets behind the ambulance sirens. "For your ears only… Jamie and Eddie… they had some bad news about the baby yesterday," he revealed to his trusted assistant who bowed her head in renewed sympathy at the added information, knowing how close the Reagan family was and how something like that would impact them all. "Some sort of possible kidney issue. That's why he was distracted and so late to the press conference… he's worried about how his wife will take it, and now… how can I put _this_ on her?" he asked as he stared straight ahead even as he followed through with what needed to be done and hit the callback button, bracing himself for the frantic reply from a woman he had grown to love as his own daughter. "Thank God... Pop is there with her right now. Please give us strength," he murmured a prayer as it rang.

"FRANK?!" came the expected high-pitched frustrated cry as Eddie picked up almost immediately after having spent the last fifteen minutes pacing through the house on her bruised foot, unwilling to listen to Henry's pleas to sit down. "What's wrong? Where's Jamie?! Please tell me what's going on! I really need to talk to him!"

Likewise in the back of the rig, Rick had just been informed by the driver of their necessary change of course to a less qualified medical center even as he continued to direct Jamie's care while his good friend's condition and vitals slowly spiraled downward in spite of the added intervention. "Damn it!" he cursed for what felt like the hundredth time in the last few minutes before pulling a napkin out of his pocket and dialing the number written there. "Kenz," he begged as the line picked up. "I really need you."

* * *

 _So, there's certainly a lot of needs evident right now with more to come as the full extent of Jamie's injuries will begin to be revealed at the hospital where opinions on treatment will differ and require someone to make drastic decisions while Frank tries to rally the family once more and searches for a way to get Eddie safely down to them even as an older brother and his wife decide to put him on ignore for a bit while they take care of some personal needs of their own... you know, the hubba-hubba or the vertical tango as Eddie described it in last week's episode. LOL._

 _Also, thanks for the reviews and please keep them coming! Helps to know people are reading this and always brightens my day a little bit to hear from you all. :)_


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

"Oh, Danny… I really needed this," Linda cooed in a sultry, happy fashion in her husband's ear as she reveled while he aggressively grasped and pulled her onto his lap and began kissing a tight pattern down her neck before tearing her bra off with little regard after unclasping it and continuing down to mouth the excited points of her body now revealed. Weeks of worry and uneasiness between the two over the outcome of her upcoming neuro testing had kept them apart before finally culminating in this pent up, passionate release as he sought to feel in control of the situation once more, and a small window of opportunity had been afforded here at home when friends had offered to take the boys for pizza and ice cream after hockey practice that evening. "Feels like you do too," she added with a laugh as his hands made insistent, short work of removing the rest of her clothes including her panties which were also pulled away and discarded to the side. Daniel Reagan was usually considerate of his wife's preference for a slow buildup to such activity, especially since the shooting had left her back tender on occasion, but tonight he was looking to have it his way for once and had approached with more force than usual, catching her just a bit off guard and scrambling her thoughts.

"We're good now, right?" he demanded out of habit as he rolled over and pinned her down on the bed, the two having relied on the fact that she cycled like Swiss clockwork effectively to curtail their family to two children at this point without using outside measures.

"Until the end of the week," she confirmed while errantly checking her mental calendar even as his rough lips sent shivers down her spine as they worked their way over her entire body. "Danny, oh God!" came a gasp as all other thoughts were pushed away while he unbuckled his belt and slid out of his pants and boxers in one motion. "Hurry," she begged as his actions were driving her quickly to a point and she longed to share that with him even as the two heard the irritating buzzing of his phone on the nightstand. "Oh, no! Not now!" she cried, unwilling to stop while caught up in the moment. "Please don't!"

"Ignore it," he ordered brusquely as he reached over and knocked the device off the table to silence it on the rug while his hands and teeth continued to rake over and excite her to the core before finally joined her inside. "They'll leave a message. Nothing's more important than this," he reasoned as he connected intimately with his wife and their kisses deepened before they worked each other into a unified release that had both gasping for breath and clinging to one another while it subsided. "Lin, you're so beautiful," he murmured as he continued to hold her many minutes later while relaxing back against the pillows. "Know what I'm thinking?" he teased.

"That we probably have enough time for round two?" she smirked and cuddled aside of him while running her hand lightly over his chest.

"No, I _know_ we have time for that," he laughed as he rolled back to his side and began to work over her gently again with every intention to follow through with that notion. "You've always been the one, even from the start… we're good together," he added with a smile while he approached her with the softness she liked this time. "No matter what happens on Friday… I don't want to lose this," he revealed as he caressed the familiar curves over her body which had changed over time, but were no less exciting to him than that first night. "I need you to be safe over everything else… you are the most important thing in my life aside from the boys. Promise me that, and I'll be fine with whichever way things turn out."

"I promise you, Dan," she assured as she traced over the smooth muscles of his shoulder and down his arm, trying to avoid the scarred places that clearly marked nearly two decades of life on the street as a cop and a Marine. "I promise I will put us first."

"Good," he breathed into her neck even as the buzz from not one, but both of their phones in quick succession became evident again.

"Danny," she said as she pulled away. "Something's up. The Gallagher's are probably sitting out front in the car with the boys trying to give us a warning," she laughed as she reached over to the nightstand to check while slipping into her robe. "Your Dad was calling," she informed. "No message or text."

"Alright, alright," he sighed heavily while rolling back over to his side and fishing for the device on the floor while his wife made her way into the bathroom after gathering her clothes up from various corners. "He sure knows how to spoil the mood," he griped as a quick look at the screen revealed the same notifications so he swiped the last. "This better be important."

Linda was busy washing up at the sink when she turned the water off with a frown after hearing a bump of a drawer slamming shut and a not-so-subtle curse from the bedroom. "Danny, what's the matter?" she started as she walked back into the room to find him scrambling to get dressed. "Is it the boys? Pop?" she gasped as she took in the immediate shocked and broken look on her husband's face. Like everyone else in the family as a cop's wife she had an ingrained sense of where all the other members were at a given time and to her knowledge no one was on duty at that moment so it had to be something else.

"No, the boys… they're fine," he stuttered and searched for the words. "It's Jamie…" he choked out as his frightened eyes looked up and met hers for the first time. "Dad says there's been an accident down in DC… he was… it was a hit and run by the hotel," he swallowed as he tried to bring his shocked mind up to speed with what he had just heard. "They, um... just got to the hospital… taking him back for scans now. Broken leg, ribs and maybe some internal injuries. Dad says it's his femur that's the worst I guess, pretty bad… he lost a lot of blood and he's gonna need surgery for sure," Danny revealed as she hurried over to hold him. "He was awake on scene, but really messed up... talking about Joe's car and wanting to come home 'n stuff. God, Lin! That damn kid! It's one thing after the next with him! He never looks out for himself! It's just like that call we got from Spencer when he was at Harvard, but this time it really happened!"

"Danny, now calm down," Linda urged as the nurse in her came to the forefront and she sought to settle him even though she knew this could be a serious situation by all accounts… Still he would worry enough about his baby brother and did not need to be advised of all the possible complications that could arise, like death from any number of reasons including embolisms. "Femur fractures can be scary looking if they're open… even if they're not because they bleed so much and they're painful… there can be a lot of complications, especially with the lungs, but if he got EMS treatment right away and has surgery by a competent ortho within twenty-four hours it's usually a good outcome, okay? Most likely they'll use an internal rod to fix it and he won't even need a cast… we get those patients on their feet and weight bearing within days now, alright? Awake and talking at the scene is good too, even if he was a little altered. Most of the vics we get in with injuries like that are babbling nonsense at first from the pain, and then afterwards from the meds. Remember, Jamie always reacts like that and then bounces back from this stuff faster than you think he will."

"Yeah, okay… thanks, Lin," he sighed, grateful for the assurances and followed up with a kiss on her forehead before reaching for his car keys and phone. "You're right... he always has, even when he was little," he acknowledged, remembering in particular one spectacular trip headfirst down the stairs that had sent everyone into a panic, only to have Jamie arrive back home from the ER chattering happily with Mary, sporting a few stitches and a rather big ice cream cone purchased by a still-shaken grandfather who had carried him there in the first place.

"You're leaving anyway," Linda sighed. "It's already getting late," she reminded looking over at the clock which read quarter to nine. "Where are you going?" she asked as if she didn't know.

"Bay Ridge and then down to DC," he informed. "Dad wants me to pick up Eddie and bring her. He can't find another way to get her down there any quicker before morning and he doesn't want her coming alone… Pop's already over there with Kaylin and Erin's on her way to stay at the house too, but she's taking a cab because she can't drive when she's upset. I've gotta, hon," he advised before pulling her in close for a hug. "It's about four hours down the turnpike but traffic's light now. By the time I go over and get her… we'll be down there by two o'clock or so."

"Danny, I don't want you driving that far at night when you're tired and upset, either," Linda worried. "And the Jeep has been acting up and overheating lately."

"I'll be fine... I'll grab her car once I'm there, okay? That thing practically drives itself," he assured, unaware of the issues Eddie had with the vehicle that very day. "Tell the boys good night for me," he added with a snap of his fingers as he grabbed an overnight bag out of the closet and started shoving a few more changes of clothes into it. "I might need these," he acknowledged before going into the bathroom to retrieve some toiletries too.

"Danny, wait! How long are you planning on being gone?" Linda asked. "My appointment with Dr. Jacobs for the neuro testing is on Friday afternoon," she reminded as she pulled her robe closed nervously and clutched the neckline. "They said if I needed a mild sedative or anything I'd need to have someone drive me home. This is important…. it took pulling all kinds of strings to get authorization… if I try to reschedule it might be months or it could get denied the next time," she worried.

"I know, babe," he assured. "You said Jamie would have the surgery within twenty-four hours, right?" he added while zipping up his bag. "So by tomorrow afternoon probably at the latest. Dad's got a plane coming back first thing Friday morning to get the staff home before the storm. I'll be on that if I need to… even if they're still down there, okay? I promise. I know how important this is to you."

"Alright, Danny," Linda conceded with a sad smile. "I'm sorry for sounding so selfish with what happened to your brother tonight, but this is something… well it's been months, and I already feel like time is against us. I have to know and I need you there with me. Let me get you a big mug of black coffee made for the drive first, though," she offered. "You'll need it. Call me when you get there, right? No matter how late I want to hear about what's happening and that you're safe, okay? Tell Jamie and Eddie we love them and we're praying for him. Go easy on him though, you know how much he hates hospitals. I hope he's not looking at a long layup."

###

"What exactly am I looking at here?" Frank sighed tiredly and rubbed his forehead to ward off the intense headache being generated by stress, the late hour without food since he had refused anything after their arrival at the small, almost nondescript-looking hospital, plus the fact that he was being asked to stare directly at brightly lit screens in a dark room as he tried to make sense of the series of repulsive x-rays and other scans that had just been revealed there.

"Commissioner, sir," the nervous-looking resident started. "Dr. McKitrick asked me to try to bring you up to speed on the patient's condition while he makes some preparations for surgery before he comes in to speak to you," the young man offered. "As you can clearly see the trauma victim sustained…"

"Jamie," Frank reiterated with a growl, not appreciating the unease this so-called doctor in training was projecting to him at the moment, nor that he was the one in here presenting the findings for his youngest in the first place… tests that had seemed to take an extraordinarily long time to run given the urgent circumstances and the fact that they had been at the facility for well over an hour already. "He's not just a trauma vic; he's a decorated NYPD sergeant, a Harvard-educated lawyer, a husband, a father, a brother, and he's my son! His name is Jamie!"

"Yes, sir," came the reply accompanied by an apprehensive clearing of the throat, although that advisement would not be followed as the resident appeared not to have the guff to wander away from the clear directives he had been given not to personalize the situation since he had been sent in to do the distasteful dirty work of getting the family's consent for what was sure to be a shocking prognosis for them. "Your son sustained a seriously contaminated open comminuted distal shaft fracture of the right femur above the knee with major trauma to the surrounding musculature, nervous and vascular systems as well as an unstable transverse tibial fracture here," he pointed to an obvious line straight across the shin bone, "with a corresponding break in the fibula. By conservative estimates with these conditions including a transected femoral artery branch he has incurred a massive blood loss from his leg alone."

"Jesus," Rick mouthed as his focus was drawn to the first injury mentioned, his experienced eyes noting that not only was it comminuted… broken into three or more pieces… many of those multi-bits were damn near pulverized and left a telling large gap between the edges of the bone as it was drawn apart to maintain the normal leg length in the traction splint. "Kenz, where are you?" he worried to himself with a quick look at his watch.

"Rick informed me of all that pretty much from what he observed at the accident scene nearly two hours ago!" Frank shot back irritably, having discussed the probable injuries and the experienced FDNY man's assessment for the likely course of treatment extensively with him in the waiting room so that he was well-prepared for this encounter. "I assume you are replacing the blood and fluids and have started antibiotics to ward off infection. Now what aren't you telling me?"

"Sir, your son also sustained as many as five or six broken ribs on the left, a pulmonary contusion… that's a bruised lung which has caused a pneumothorax… air is slowly leaking into the surrounding chest cavity, and CT scans indicate a growing fluid field in the abdomen consistent with a lacerated or ruptured spleen, which is also a life-threatening situation," came the explanation followed by a deep breath as the final bomb was about to be dropped. "We have transfused a number of units of blood already, but his pressure is continuing to hover and drop. Dr. McKitrick, our on call surgeon, has arrived and is preparing to operate to remove the spleen. It is his opinion that the patient is at severe risk for infection and a combination of hypothermia, acidosis and coagulopathy… a condition where his blood will stop clotting with fatal results. Due to the apparent severe vascular and nerve damage in his leg and the likelihood of bony nonunion due to the damage, it is his judgement that the best course of action to preserve the patient's life is to perform a transfemoral amputation at the same time. We'll need these consent forms signed by a spouse, parent or sibling, in that order of availability, please," he rushed to include while holding up the folder and a pen.

"Wait, he's bleeding into his abdomen, so this doctor wants to take the spleen _and_ the leg?" Rick demanded as Frank gawked back in shock, wholly unprepared for that possibility as he had been led to expect far less invasive measures would be taken first. "Slice and dice?" the rescue man growled as he took a step towards the clearly intimidated resident who backed up still clutching the required forms. "Does he have somewhere to be later?! Where'd this quack practice before, HUH? LET ME GUESS!"

"Dr. McKitrick serves as an officer with the Naval Medical Reserves. We are a joint military hospital…" the young doctor began before Rick's open hand hit the wall next to him with a heavy resounding thud and he found himself pinned back against it nose to nose with one very intense and intimidating former Marine and Navy medical man himself.

"Well, you tell the esteemed Dr. McKitrick, who didn't have the balls to come in here and talk to us himself, to put that scalpel in his back pocket and sit on it until we get a second opinion!" Rick continued in a threatening tone as he pushed himself away. "Commissioner, don't sign those papers, yet," he added with a pointed look at Frank.

"Sir, I understand this is upsetting," the resident offered as he struggled to control his own heart rate which had soared with that up-close pappa bear-like encounter as he nervously straightened his tie. "But the patient is now too unstable to move and all the trauma surgeons at MercyStar are engaged with incoming cases from the accident on the Beltway. Their ER is closed. Dr. McKitrick is the only one available. In emergency situations like this implied consent can be used if we believe it to be in the patient's best interest. Without immediate action he will in all likelihood bleed to death within the next few hours. Any court will find in our favor," he defended with a huff, having been thrust into this very situation before with the staff at this hospital and lacking the Mcat scores and financial means to go elsewhere for medical training except as appointed in the reserves.

"Are you threatening to take my son in for a surgery like this against the family's wishes at this time?!" Frank barked back incredulously as the initial stage of disbelief was wearing off and his own anger was growing with the situation and the apparent lack of viable options for them… Baker would be put on this immediately… had they been back home in New York, if he had another trusted aide at his side who was known for sorting through minefields like this before they even happened… odds are Jamie would have his pick of the most qualified surgeons available on the East Coast from any specialty he needed at a moment's notice, but now due to circumstances his son's life and limb apparently clung to this one man, that was of course until another voice was heard from behind them in the doorway… one who had listened and observed the discussion to soak in as much information as she could for the last several minutes before stepping in.

"Well, it looks like I got here just in time," Charlotte MacKenzie announced as she strode into the room dressed casually in a sweater, jeans and those ever-present Birkenstocks with a small smirk directed towards Rick. "Some things never change, do they Corpsman Fellows? Back to intimidating the plebes I see. You called for a consult?" she offered before immediately focusing on the images before her. "Oh, holy crap," she muttered with a singular look at that femoral view as her heart fell. "Get me his latest vitals and go tell this so-called Dr. McKitrick to meet me in here ASAP!" she ordered the resident who was more than happy to leave and distance himself from the pair of intimidating men and this now overconfident five-foot nothing redheaded intruder who had moved in and immediately established command without even telling him her name.

"We need to talk," Kenzie replied grimly as she looked up and met Frank and Rick's eyes.

* * *

 _So will Kenzie swoop in and save the day for Jamie and the Reagans, or might there be other circumstances that could leave him at the mercy of an apparently not-so-competent doctor? Next, Danny arrives to escort a shell-shocked Eddie to Washington, but the news they receive en route and decisions that need to be made from afar will leave them sitting anxious and stranded as Mason Malevsky's tampering comes into play again, even as the plaid-coated man himself makes his way towards the nation's capital for a rendezvous with his own son. Also, did anyone catch that little part with Danny and Linda? Might there have been some errant bun-making activity for the two at the start of the chapter? Hmm? To be revealed later!_


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20

"C'mon, sweetie-pie… please come out here and talk to me," Henry begged as he tried once again unsuccessfully to get a traumatized Kaylin to budge from under the end table and behind the couch where she had crawled after he and Eddie had tried gently to explain that her daddy was in an accident with a car… those two words, "car" and "accident" sending the little girl into an instant panicked tailspin state of insecurity as she spiraled back to that awful time when her "old" mommy had also been in one, and considering the kitty catastrophe of the morning, telling her he had been hurt crossing the street didn't seem like the way to go either. "Sweetheart, Pop Pop is too big and old to get down and come in there with you and I'd really like to give you a hug right now," he offered to no avail and he sat back on the chair with a heavy sigh and shake of his head. "And we all thought Danny was the stubborn one," he muttered.

"I… can't... believe this is happening," Eddie sniffed as she sat next to Erin on the couch; her sister-in-law immediately wrapping her arms around her for comfort after arriving at the front door via cab just moments before. "I mean it's just not fair!… We were talking about finding out if we were having a girl or boy and he was laughing about it, and then all of a sudden he wasn't there anymore!" she sobbed. "He told me it was cold out and said he would call back in a minute when he got inside, but I kept teasing him about it being a girl and of course I wouldn't let it go… he must have been distracted when he walked across the street. This is all my fault!" she cried and to little ears under the table and behind the couch it sounded a whole lot more like it had been this mysterious new girl baby's fault… the one that had caused her daddy to get hurt by a car.

"No, no… now... Dad said they suspect the car ran the red light while Jamie was in the crosswalk. He told me Rick was up ahead of him and heard it, but didn't see it happen and there were no other witnesses so far," Erin cajoled as she hugged her harder. "None of this is your fault, Eddie… it was just an accident. I'm sure Washington has even more traffic cams than here in New York. They'll track this guy down and make him pay for leaving the scene," she assured. "Have you heard anything else from the hospital?"

"Not since your Dad called earlier and said that when he checked Jamie was still back having more x-rays and a CT scan done and they were waiting for the surgeon to get there. No one had really talked to them yet," Eddie revealed sadly. "He told me that, um... well, that he was more stable once the EMT guys gave him oxygen, fluids and splinted his leg with some kind of special traction thingy. He said that Jamie was awake and talking at the scene… he said he loved us and that he was worried about me and getting home before the snow and everything, but that he had meds for the pain now so that he couldn't talk anymore."

"Well that's unusual," Erin tried to hearten lightly, not knowing that her father had fluffed a little on that information so as to not upset his frantic pregnant daughter-in-law any further over the phone until he had a more concrete diagnosis to offer… one that would devastate her and break his own heart when he was forced to reveal it. "Usually when a certain someone is hopped up on the good stuff we can't shut him up, remember? Dollars to doughnuts Dad just said that because he didn't want you to hear Jamie going on about everything… he hates seeing him like that, and that's exactly why Danny volunteered to drive down there with you tonight... he's the opposite and just loves to torment his doped up baby brother, okay? Now, do you have a few things packed in case you need to stay for a couple of days? Do you need me to help? Danny said he would be here any minute."

"No, I have a bag ready," Eddie answered sadly. "I called my mom too. She said the agency in Rochester basically kicked her out and told her to take all her vacation days once she gave them notice, so she's going to try to get a last-minute ticket to fly in before the storm or drive down to help you and Pop with Kaylin while I'm away. I really appreciate that you're staying here with him to help watch her tonight… she got so upset when she heard me on the phone and I'm sure we'll be gone at least over the weekend until Jamie has the surgery and we can figure out a way to get him home," she teared up. "I just wish my baby girl would come out here for Mommy," she tried with a patient inflection and failed again. "Kaylin Elizabeth, I'm gonna miss you while I go help Daddy get better. Please give me a snuggle before Uncle Danny gets here and I have to leave."

"Don't worry about anything here," Erin assured. "Pop will find a way to talk her out, he always does, and between him, me, Nicki, Linda and your mom, we'll have her all settled while you're gone. You're upset… for good reason," she added quickly as to not put any more guilt on Eddie. "And she just senses that and it's scaring her, but it's okay… we'll take care of it. You just concentrate on yourself and helping Jamie get well, alright?"

"Thanks, Erin," Eddie acknowledged even though she wanted nothing more than to hold her whole little family in her arms at the moment… Kaylin, Jamie and the little baby all at once even as the sound of a heavy stomp across the porch and knock at the door signaled that Danny had arrived and it was time to go.

"Hey, sis," he greeted with a hug and kiss for Erin after she had quickly gotten up and opened the door to let him in. "Everyone okay here?" he asked as he looked around the room with his arm around her. "Any more news from down there?"

"Nothing lately," Eddie revealed as she stood up to embrace him too, feeling just a little awkward about asking her brother-in-law for help given the situation between him and Linda, but deciding to push that away and just concentrate on the current crisis at hand, which included saying goodbye to a hidden little girl and driving down to Washington to be with her injured husband. Kaylin, on the other hand, had other ideas about her uncle and crawled out from behind the couch immediately after hearing his voice and ran over to latch onto his leg.

"Well, hey there, cuteness, I didn't see you down there," he laughed and released his sister so that he could lean down and pick her up. "What are you doing up so late? Huh?" he asked as she wrapped her arms around his neck and her sad cries of "Uncle Danny" tugged at his heart as despite a rough start between the two back in the beginning when Kaylin had first come to be with Jamie and the Reagans, Danny and the little girl had been growing closer over recent months. Still, it was unusual for her to greet him in this fashion so quickly, especially given the circumstances of the night. "It's okay, baby… your Daddy's gonna be fine," he tried to comfort her even as he felt the salty tears washing down his neck. "He gets into this kind of trouble all the time, doesn't he? Maybe Uncle D will have to take over the soccer team for a little bit again though," he joked. "That was fun last time, wasn't it?" he asked, trying to get her to laugh about that final game of the season that had seen the both of them end up on the couch with ice packs on very different boo-boos so she would loosen up her death grip on his throat a little.

"Now there's something I never thought we'd see again," Henry huffed as he stood up from his chair where he had been trying to coax the little girl out. "C'mere young lady," he ordered gently as he reached for Kaylin and she finally relented and allowed herself to be transferred into his soft arms. "It's late and your Pop Pop is getting tired. You, me and that big kitty cat of yours are going to go brush our teeth, say a nice prayer for Daddy to feel better soon and then take a long nap upstairs in your bed. After we wake up and have breakfast with Auntie Erin your Mommy will be with Daddy and we'll see if he'll be able to talk to you on the phone for a little bit, okay? Everything's gonna be fine, sweetheart," he promised. "That goes for you too, Edit," he added with a firm hug as she reached over to kiss her daughter's cheek goodbye. "You take care of yourself and my other little great-grandbaby too," he ordered. "Remember, we're Reagans... we go through this kind of stuff all the time. Jamie's a tough Irishman; he'll be fine. The car probably looks worse than he does. Let us know when you hear anything."

"I will, Pop," she returned quietly with a downturned look and a trembling chin as she took Kaylin into her own arms for more much-needed hugging.

"Call my phone anytime. I'll stay downstairs here," Erin offered. "That way you won't wake anyone else up," she added with a nod to her niece. "Tell Jamie we love him and that Nicki and I will help out any way you guys need us to until he's back on his feet, okay? Love you," she added with a hug as Eddie slipped into her coat and picked up her small overnight bag before heading back into the kitchen to grab her phone and charger.

"Look after her, Danny," Henry added quietly with a squeeze of his grandson's arm as they stood in the foyer before she came back. "I spoke to Francis myself earlier when she was upstairs packing. He didn't want to upset her, but he said Jamie's leg looked pretty bad at the scene," he revealed. "Rick thinks it's broken in at least three places plus he's got a pile of bad ribs. He's going to be laid up for a while. Eddie's really taking this hard and feels like it's somehow her fault. Don't let her go there."

"Jesus, Pop," Danny gasped softly, suddenly realizing that there might be more to this than his father had let on in their earlier conversation while promising with a soft "I won't" before raising his voice. "Hey, Eddie… do you mind if we take your fancy new mom-mobile?" he asked. "The Jeep's been overheating here and there and I'm guessing you'd rather not get stuck anywhere on the way down," he laughed lightly in a continued attempt to ease the obvious tension in the room, and then looked back puzzled when his attempt at humor was met with flat stares from both his sister-in-law and grandfather.

"Eddie…" Henry warned as he reached for Kaylin.

"It's fine, Pop," she answered tiredly as she handed the little girl back. "I had battery problems with it today," she explained to Danny. "The roadside tech was here and checked it… he said everything is okay. I guess as long as it starts we're good to go. There's more room in the back anyway in case maybe Jamie can come home that way," she added optimistically while Danny and his grandfather shared a sad look between them behind her back. "I'll leave Kaylin's car seat in the garage in case you guys go out," she said picking up the keys out of the basket and pausing for one last kiss for her little girl. "Mommy and Daddy love you baby. We'll both be home soon," she murmured. "I promise… let's get going," she sighed.

"Later, Pop… Erin, cuteness," Danny said his goodbyes before turning to follow Eddie out of the front door, closing it behind him with one final thought.

"How come you're the one that's limping?"

###

Just as Danny and Eddie were starting out on their long journey after her car thankfully sparked to life immediately once she showed him where the dummy button was of course, another in a house on that quiet street was anxiously pacing and contemplating a trip south himself after a call from his own son revealed that an oh-so-carefully designed plot to torture Jamie, and by extension his family, over the next few months had gone horrible wrong right from the start. Mason Malevsky was fuming as he considered the ramifications of Matthew's boneheaded mistake. After being ousted from the FBI's esteemed Behavioral Analysis Unit, it had taken him years to engineer this including searches to find the parts and restore that damn Chevelle after Sonny's last attempt to use it to off Jamie had left it totaled and on the auction block for parts. To Mason it had seemed perfectly fitting to use that car first as a distraction and then as bait to lure the brothers to their end before making Frank Reagan pay the ultimate price, but for him the ultimate devil was in the details and he had bided his time until everything was in place… and now his perfectly constructed plan was totally off the rails due to the incompetence of his own son and his fist slammed down in anger on the kitchen table, rattling the dishes left there.

"Goddamn kid has never done anything right his whole damn life! Couldn't even be born without killing his own mother!" he railed as he turned course and walked to the living room window of the little Cape Cod and stared down the street with interest, spotting the familiar green Jeep of one Detective Daniel Reagan parked out front of the house at 801 Driftwood Way and Eddie's new black, high tech and easily tampered with crossover backing out of the driveway before pulling ahead at a good pace and passing the house pointed in the direction of the Verrazano and by extension I-95 and the route to points south… like Washington DC.

Of course, he smiled and was sure to stand with an obvious silhouette in the window as the car drove through… by all reports, and by that he meant the police reports which were being covertly forwarded to him by friends with still-active connections, Jamison Reagan had been injured badly in the unwitnessed hit-and-run. Unwitnessed and likely to stay that way as all the traffic cams in that area had been taken down purposefully by a mysterious computer glitch which left the damaged Chevelle now safely tucked away under cover in an underground garage, soon to be picked up by an enclosed trailer and hauled back to the storage locker where it had resided here in New York for the last several years. That fact also meant the little blond irritant would be on her way to her husband's bedside, conveniently accompanied by the older Reagan brother who happened to be his other target. Perhaps this little course of action would have to be truncated he thought regretfully, as the plan had always been to have the commissioner lose both of his remaining sons at once, thereby exponentially magnifying the inflicted pain he had felt when news of Sonny's suicide had reached him. Mason Malevsky was anything but an eye for an eye man… identifying more with the mobster notion of you put one of ours in the hospital, we'll put one of yours in the morgue… or two more in the cemetery as it were.

It was time to clean up Matthew's damn mess before an investigation ensued that he could not control and anything pointed back to them to ruin his intent. Joseph Conor Reagan would soon have more company in that little family plot down the way Mason assured himself as he took a few minutes to pack his own small overnight bag, complete with a pair of glittering syringes safely placed in the side pocket in the event they were needed before he headed out to the garage to fire up his own car and turn it south on the same path towards that hospital where Jamison Reagan now lay… the current subject of a heated debate between two surgeons with very different ideas of how to approach his care and a father who had his finger on the button of a familiar speed dial number as he had reluctantly to admit that it was no longer his decision to make.

* * *

 _So it looks like we're headed towards a somewhat familiar confrontation at the hospital as Eddie and Danny, as well as Mason Malevsky, are on their way down towards the less than superbly staffed Capital Region Health Care Center. Who will get there first, and will it matter by that point? Next, a pair of anxious Reagans face a series of delays on their trip, including orders from a concerned father to pull over while he delivers news that forces Eddie into some difficult choices as Jamie's now official next of kin. Big chapter in the 'werks' next!_


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 21

"You know you can always talk to me," Danny offered when they were about forty-five minutes into their trip and he was humming along at a good clip going down the New Jersey Turnpike, figuring that the badge and Commissioner's courtesy card in his pocket, plus the details behind their journey would give him a pass in the event any State Trooper decided to interrupt their progress with some flashing lights. "I mean I'm no Dr. Phil, but you haven't said much since we left except for a few choice words about that new neighbor guy living down the street. What did you call him? A vulture? You really think there's something to worry about there? You sound like Jamie now… do I need to check him out?"

"No, not really," Eddie conceded as she recalled making that comment under her breath while they passed Mason's home; Danny must have radar for that kind of stuff, she reasoned. "I already did and there wasn't much there. He's just creepy, and I swear he's been watching the house lately… like tonight. What was he doing standing by the window staring at us when we were leaving?"

"Well, if he tries anything while Pop's there he'll run into a 38 special," Danny mouthed to himself while carefully pulling out to pass a large truck. "This car drives really nice," he commented out loud to change the uncomfortable subject as he had more appreciation for the pure design and mechanics of the upgraded vehicle than his brother who was turned off by all the amenities.

"Thanks," Eddie answered blankly as she stared out of the window, unfocused on anything but their destination and thoughts about how her husband was doing at that very instant while the nighttime lights flashed by. "Jamie thought it was too much, but since I was trading in that flashy Porsche my dad gave me for graduation…" she trailed off with a sigh. That planned trip to the correctional facility to visit her father on Sunday and reveal the baby news would obviously have to be cancelled, and from the sound of it he'd be finding out he was going to be a grandpa again over the phone, anyway.

"You okay? Do you need to stop at all?" Danny tried again with the small talk, having run into a rather silent wall at this point while trying to heed his grandfather's request not to let Eddie get too down on herself about the current situation. "I remember when Linda was pregnant with Sean at this stage we could barely drive ten blocks without looking for a bathroom… I think we stopped at every restroom in a twenty-square mile radius of the house by the time he was born."

"I'm fine… maybe later. I just want to get down there as soon as we can," Eddie replied with a hand now on her tummy, wondering if she should even approach the subject of Danny and Linda's plight before deciding against it once more. It was worse considering what that time would be like if things didn't turn out so well where they were going… how would she ever get through it without Jamie by her side?

"Eddie, he's gonna be fine, too," Danny assured as he looked over with worry, hoping that he would be able to say the same thing about his sister-in-law when this was all over.

###

"KENZ! WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT JACKASS IS RIGHT?!" Rick stood back flabbergasted in the conference room where the three, including Frank, were discussing Jamie's situation as she was flipping through the chart provided by that nervous resident who had once again excused himself to try to go locate the elusive Dr. McKitrick. "Is it me, or didn't you and I have a talk about these very same kind of slice and dicers tonight!"

"I didn't say he was right about everything, Rick… let's put our listening ears on, shall we?" Kenzie remarked flippantly as she quickly studied the latest vitals and lab results. "I said given where we are and the circumstances there might not be any other choice," she explained before gathering up the folders and heading for the door. "Life before limb, remember? I won't know until I get a look at what we have available here. This place doesn't exactly appear to be the Mayo Clinic at first glance, and if that resident is any indication the staffing isn't up to par either. Plus places like this are a mix of military and civilian personnel with a strict idea of hierarchy and they generally hate when someone new comes in and challenges that. C'mon, let's go see what they're actually doing to him back there," she added as she led the two men directly into the somewhat modest trauma unit at the smaller hospital center and to the isolated bed space where Jamie had been situated and lay looking insignificant amid a plethora of medical equipment surrounding him and covering nearly every square visible inch. Frank's throat immediately tightened as he took in how very pale his son had progressively become and the fact that there was no longer any measured response to a tight grasp of his hand.

"His c-spine was cleared, or didn't anyone get that memo?" Kenzie frowned as she adjusted his oxygen rate after a glance at the monitor and immediately noted the somewhat too tight, rigid collar that had been reapplied to Jamie's neck after he had returned from imaging. "What's say we take off the medieval torture device and let the boy breathe some considering all those broken ribs and a pneumothorax are already making that difficult? About time to fix that too, isn't it? Or is a chest tube gonna place itself before his lung collapses?"

"And you are?" the assigned nurse challenged as she hurried over to ward off the three intruders that had just stepped into her area without invitation.

"I happen to be someone who knows the first premise of the ABC's, that being AIRWAY is kind of important, and hey… the B is for BREATHING, just goes to show it's something that we should be focusing on and not going out of our way to compromise," came the return brazen comment as Kenzie reached over and snagged the woman's stethoscope without missing a beat to listen to Jamie's chest. "Dr. Charlotte MacKenzie, by the way," she formally introduced herself.

"I don't care who you think you are!" the angry nurse retorted as she snatched her equipment back when it was offered, even as she loosened, but did not remove the misapplied collar. "This is Dr. McKitrick's patient and you have no authorization to be back here! I'm going to have to ask you to leave or I will summon security!"

"I wish you would summon Dr. McKitrick so he can explain why a patient with a decreasing hematocrit level and a grade three splenic injury on top of obvious catastrophic orthopedic needs is lying here and was not transferred to a Level I trauma center immediately after he was stabilized!" Kenzie barked back as she refused to give way and had a peek at the splint under the blanket covering Jamie's right leg, feeling for a foot pulse which was present, but faint, and any reaction to painful stimuli in several areas of which there was none.

"Perhaps because that physician has already determined what the best course of action for said patient is in his opinion," came a cold reply from behind as the aforementioned missing surgeon, Dr. Robert McKitrick, made his presence known. "And said patient would be on his way to the operating room right now if it was not for your interference!" he added as everyone turned to meet the rather tall later-aged man with the salt and pepper hair who stepped up to the bedside.

"You mean the _easiest_ course of action," Rick growled as he entered solidly back into the fray and renewed his stance that more should be done for his friend than had been offered by either doctor in attendance at his bedside at this point. "Glad to see you finally showed up to talk to us!"

"There's nothing to talk about," Dr. McKitrick insisted. "I've been informed that Mr. Reagan is the son of the New York City Police Commissioner, and I suppose you think that gives him some sort of special privilege here, but the fact of the matter is he is not hemodynamically stable and therefore not a candidate for transfer or other sorts of procedures. The only course of action is to remove his spleen and a severely compromised leg to preserve his life. I've already had to clamp off that artery to stop it from hemorrhaging anymore."

"His latest hematocrit level is borderline," Kenzie insisted. "Angioembolization… a cath lab technique can be used to insert small coils in the splenic vessels to stem the blood flow and could stop the bleeding and preserve his spleen so that it can heal; it has an excellent success rate… It used to be that all splenic injuries were treated surgically, but removing it will increase his susceptibility to infections for the rest of his life so for the last few decades the focus has been on preservation if at all possible," Kenzie turned and explained directly to Frank, the first person to have addressed him in several minutes. "Right now he is a high-risk candidate for sepsis given the nature of the open fracture to his femur."

"Which is why the next step is to remove that," McKitrick informed self-righteously. "The severity of the injury will leave him with a non-unified bone and a useless lower limb anyway, plus puts him at risk for a host of complications from other things like fat emboli which occur in all patients with long-bone fractures, of which he has not one, but two… and many in this position develop a fatal systemic dysfunction, particularly in the triad of skin, brain, and lungs. The longer we wait while the fracture is open… the more likely this is to occur."

"But, Kenz… you said you could fix a bone like that, your study…" Rick started before McKitrick's snide laughter filled the area.

"Oh, boy… now I understand. Figures you'd be selling something," he smirked. "Commissioner, in all my years I've never seen anyone successfully fix something like _that,"_ he gestured as he pulled one of the printed x-rays out of Jamie's chart. "See that gap here? That's like the Grand Canyon when it comes to bone regrowth, especially with an already compromised vascular system. No way to put back what's not there anymore and on top of it your son has a marked neurological deficit below his knee so his tibial or peroneal nerves have likely been severed or impinged by the fractures. Why risk his life when he's better off without it? A few months to a year and he'll be walking again. People function nearly normally with prosthesis all the time now."

"Nearly normally," Frank muttered with a sad look back at his quiet boy, forced to lie there in silence while such decisions were being made for him… decisions that were no longer his own father's right to make. "His life… Jamie's life is most important," he choked out in truth. "The rest doesn't matter if he's not with us."

"Give us a minute," Rick ordered as he pulled Frank and Kenzie over to the side of the hall for some privacy. "C'mon," he begged once more as his eyes went back and forth between them. "This is Jamie Reagan we're talking about… the guy that runs marathons for little kids dressed like Spiderman and jumps off bridges even when it scares the crap out of him… he's a fighter, I know it. And Kenzie… I know you too, and if you say something you developed might work, it already does. You are the best doctor and surgeon I have ever seen. Commissioner," he refocused. "I wouldn't put Jamie's life in anyone else's hands on the planet. If it can be fixed, she's the one that would be able to do it; I guarantee it."

"Rick, there are no such guarantees," Kenzie added as a reminder. "Commissioner, sir, I do have a study up at Columbia right now that is focused on finding innovative ways to treat bone injuries like this… it's proprietary so I'm not able to get into all the details, but we're a long way from my equipment and staff down here and we don't have the luxury of time to be able to get your son to another facility. I also need permission from the program director to accept someone new into the trial first. If I were to operate on Jamie here, it would be of the utmost urgency to arrest the bleeding from his spleen initially and then to stabilize the fractures and repair what vascular and neurological damage I could before they become permanent. He would then have to be airlifted back to the city for me to approach the rest in the next few days. It is not without the added risks mentioned and several additional surgeries," she revealed. "It would also require an extended period of rehabilitation, and there are no promises that once I get in there and assess the damage that I won't make the exact same recommendation Dr. McKitrick just did," she added with an honesty that resonated with Frank. "Whoever gives consent _must_ understand that… and trust me to make the decision as needed at the moment. Infection, stroke, blood clots, pneumonia and just about anything else are also factors."

Frank paused as he weighed that information as well as made an instant assessment of which doctor he trusted most with his son's care, still… it was no longer his direct call to make. "Dr. MacKenzie, I must also speak to someone… decisions like this lie with Jamie's wife now," Frank acknowledged with a heavy heart at the thought of needing to put this on her, especially now with the urgency required and given the fact that she was already upset with the situation and en route. "But I do trust that you are the most capable doctor here that will keep his best interest at heart and will communicate that to her. I'll need a few minutes," he added as he reached for his phone.

"Likewise," Kenzie answered as she reached for her own device.

"Kenz, something tells me that this McKitrick guy will howl about having his toes shot off like this," Rick warned although relief was evident on his face at the direction things were headed. "He's gonna make a stink as far up the chain as he can get."

"Well then I might have to pull out the big guns myself," she assured. "Time is of the essence, gentleman," she reminded while walking a few steps down the hall to make the necessary arrangements while Frank chose to return to Jamie's bedside instead… taking a moment to pray over his son while drawing strength for what needed to be done and assuring himself that this was the correct move, even with his boy now laying in stillness before him.

###

"So this GPS app thing is pretty cool," Danny offered as he motioned to the car's center navigation screen to break the uneasy silence once more after they had traveled without speaking for some time. "It actually shows you the traffic and where the cops are? I hope this doesn't work back in the city or it'll make our jobs twice as hard… the perps will be able to rabbit before we even get there... Looks like we've got a clear run to Baltimore. We're making good time."

"Yeah," came the quiet, disinterested reply. "That's nice, thanks, Danny. I'm sorry I'm not such good company tonight," Eddie sighed. "I just can't help wondering and worrying about what's happening, you know?"

"Hey… no, that's… I get it," he answered just as the screen lit up once more with a notification for an incoming hands free call and a picture of Frank's face in the corner. "That's what you have for Dad?" he kidded as he spotted his father's candid look. "Kind of looks like a serial killer's mugshot."

"Frank?" Eddie ignored him and answered immediately, desperate for news. "Is he okay? Have you heard anything from the doctor yet?"

"As a matter of fact, I'm in the back with Jamie now. The surgeon was just here, and we were discussing the options," Frank revealed in an even voice. "Are we on speaker? Danny, how's the drive going? You anywhere where you're able to pull over so we can talk?"

"We're on the turnpike in her car… we can talk while I'm on the road, Dad. Eddie's got hands free everything here," Danny advised. "We're legal if that's what you're worried about."

"It's not, Dan," came the hollow reply that sent both of their hearts crashing down instantly. "Pull over, son… there's some things… things that we need to go over and I need to know you're both safe and able to listen to me." With that tone in his father's voice Danny immediately changed lanes, slowed and drove over to park far to the right in a section of the emergency stopping shoulder.

"What is it?" he asked huskily even as he put the four-way flashers on before reaching for Eddie's hand which was clearly shaking now. "C'mon, Dad, is he going to be okay or…?"

"He needs some more surgery than we thought at first," Frank began to explain. "Eddie, you're Jamie's wife and his next of kin now, so we need your permission to proceed and you have to understand that the tests have shown in addition to the broken leg and ribs he's got what they call a lacerated spleen… part of it has ruptured from the blunt force trauma and he's slowly bleeding into his belly. It has to be fixed either by removing the spleen itself or another technique that inserts coils through a catheter into his artery and tries to slow things down so that it clots and heals itself… from what I understand for now and his future health that's the optimal approach and has a good success rate. A person can live without a spleen, but is more likely to suffer from infections later on in life because it's a source of the body's immune system. I have one surgeon here from this hospital… McKitrick. He recommends taking the spleen out completely while Rick's friend and former colleague that happened to be down here and came to consult… Charlotte MacKenzie… she was a top-rated trauma surgeon attached to the Marines I think," he revealed as Danny himself sat straighter at that reference. "She believes it's in Jamie's best interest to undergo the less invasive procedure. Rick trusts her opinion and skills, sweetheart... and I have to say I agree with his assessment. It needs to be done soon though; we can't wait for you to get here or his numbers will drop too low and they'll have no choice but to operate and remove it fully."

"So that's easy then, right?" Eddie sniffed after a brief pause and took a deep breath since she had been instantly prepared for much worse. "He has the less invasive thing done by the doctor you trust. There's more though, right? You wouldn't have made us pull over otherwise… please, what is it? SOMEBODY HAS TO TELL ME WHAT'S GOING ON!" she demanded.

"Eddie, the leg is… well, it's much, much worse than I… I'm sorry, I didn't realize or prepare you for this earlier…" Frank hemmed as he choked up and found it hard to get the words out himself. "I thought that it would just be… fixed, but it's bad though, sweetheart. There are three broken bones, but the femur is the worst. Some of the bone is… on the x-ray it's missing or apparently too damaged to save. McKitrick… he advises an amputation…" he paused for a deep breath and swallow after getting that impossible word out before he could proceed. "An amputation above the knee for a number of reasons I don't completely understand, but he feels it is unlikely the bone will ever heal onto itself and trying to do so will put Jamie at risk for severe complications. Doc Kenzie… she's got this study up at Columbia-Presbyterian Hospital in Manhattan right now that could help save it, but there are risks… serious risks for complications there too that cannot be taken lightly."

Silence reigned in the car and over the line for the next several moments as that shocking news was processed, and Eddie felt like her whole world had just been turned upside down… her perfect life, her perfect husband was now a thing of the past. "He could lose it or die?" Eddie grasped finally as she went rigid against the headrest at the thought of Jamie being dependent for the rest of his life… or worse gone completely… and for some strange reason the image in her head that instant was of her, Kaylin and the new baby hiking up and down the hills the following year in search of the perfect Christmas tree alone without him. "IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE TELLING ME NOW, FRANK REAGAN?!" she demanded in a panic as the volume and timbre of her voice increased to the shrill level and Danny began to fear himself that he was going to be alone in the car on the side of the highway with her while she herself suffered some kind medical emergency of her own. "HE COULD DIE FROM A BROKEN LEG? But I thought… I thought complications like that were for little old ladies that break their hips like Mrs. Tellis down the hall," she cried. "JAMIE, TOO?! Oh, God! What does he think? I need to talk to him! I can't make a decision like that alone!"

"It's possible," Frank admitted as he tried to remain calm. "And Jamie's not present right now, Eddie. He's still stable but weak from the blood loss and the pain drugs they've given him. He needs you to be his voice. Doc Kenzie has agreed to operate if she can get him admitted to the study, but she cautions that once she has a full view of the damage… that she might have the same opinion as the other doctor, and if that's the case… she needs your permission to do what has to be done, sweetheart. It's life over limb at this point… and if that happens, we'll get him through it. I swear to you he'll have only the finest… Eddie, she's coming back right now," Frank advised as he looked up to see Kenzie walking quickly back down the hall with a thumbs up. "He's able to be in her study. I need to know what you want to do now… time is of the essence… I'm so sorry to ask this of you," he added sadly.

For her part, Eddie felt like she had gone mute… that any further attempt to get the words out would just come across as a choking screech. She tried unsuccessfully once more to verbalize before Danny took it upon himself to do it for her as there was no way his little brother was going down without a fight. "She wants you to go ahead with this Doc Kenzie, right Eddie?" he asked as she shakily nodded to confirm, unable to do anything further in that instant. "Tell her to give him a chance, Dad… and tell him we love him and we're on the way," he added before inadvertently reaching for the dummy button to restart the already near-silently running vehicle, which of course turned the engine and all other systems completely off. Cursing, he reached to repeat his action and...

Nothing happened.

Ironically at the same instant a silver sedan from a house just down the street in the quiet Bay Ridge neighborhood passed them in the darkness as a well-trained and observant plaid-coated man instantly recognized the familiar obviously distressed car and pair of occupants off on the side of the road in the well-lit emergency pull off area. An evil smile crossed his face and his pulse quickened at the thought of the added anxiety such a delay would no doubt cause them… one that he was responsible for of course with the small erratic short that had been masterfully wired into the car's electrical system. A quick glance at the GPS on his own dashboard showed the next scheduled exit to be coming up in fifteen or so miles… but there were always emergency turnarounds scattered about to be used by police and fire units and hardly another car on the road at this hour. Mason Malevsky's fingers drummed a nervous rhythm on the steering wheel as he plotted his next move. A short time later those same fingers flipped on the turn signal before the car made an earlier-than-anticipated exit from the highway and looped around to head north once more as Mason weighed the risks of inserting himself into the situation more directly and far earlier than he had initially anticipated. He determined another drive by was in order to see if the vehicle had remained stranded and to buy time to consider his options before he continued on his quest to reach the hospital himself and make sure that any such discussions over Jamison Reagan's future were in fact unnecessary and moot. Perhaps instead of the extended plot he had devised, all of this would be taken care of tonight and Frank Reagan would be left with less than nothing… not even another grandchild to come and take his youngest son's place before the sun rose again.

* * *

 _Run-roh, so Mason is circling back as he contemplates a change of plans, with no one even aware of the scale of his threat at this time. Would Eddie and Danny really consider accepting help from this creepy stranger if he shows up at the roadside considering how desperate she is to get to Jamie at that moment, or perhaps they won't have a choice but to comply? Meanwhile back at the hospital, Kenzie takes on the task of saving Jamie's life and trying to spare his leg while scrounging for the necessary supplies and receiving little support from a hospital staff loyal to Dr. McKitrick._


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter 22

"I HATE THIS CAR! I HATE IT!" Eddie yelled with all the fury her five-two frame could muster at the time as she wound up to kick the back tire once more and was only spared repeating that same morning's mistake when her brother-in-law managed to thwart her effort by grabbing her from behind and pulling her away at the last second so she only connected with air as they watched the vehicle while it was being loaded on a rollback tow truck after the roadside mechanic was unable to restart it after a few minutes. "LET ME GO, DANNY!"

"NO WAY! Not until you promise not to go all momma bear and jump off the leash to hurt yourself!" he warned as she continued to struggle against him while he was trying to be oh-so-careful of where he put his hands in consideration of her pregnant state. "Cripes, Eddie! The last thing we need right now is someone else that can't walk! You're not going to be able to help Jamie that way!" he admonished sharply and then relaxed his grip on her arms as he felt her melt down against him instantly and sob. "I'm sorry… God, I'm so sorry," he apologized. "I'm such an idiot… I didn't mean for it to come out that way. I just meant that you were scaring me... I don't want you to get hurt, too," he added as he wrapped an arm around her shoulder and helped her move over so they could sit on the guardrail together and watch as the vehicle was strapped down just as a text alert beeped on his phone and he glanced at it.

"Hey, listen to this," he encouraged. "Doc Kenzie got approval from the hospital and Jamie's on his way into some lab for the spleen thing. She should be able to stop the bleeding soon, and then they'll work on his leg in a few hours, okay? Maybe we can still get there first," Danny revealed with a relieved sigh as he read the message. "Dad tried calling you first… where's your phone, Eddie?"

"In there I guess," she replied with a defeated wave of her hand at the car as Danny jumped up to go retrieve their things before they too disappeared down the road. "What are we going to do?" she cried when he returned. "They'll only take us back to the garage with them, and it's miles in the wrong direction! Danny! We have to get down there… what if there's a chance Jamie will wake up and I'm not there? He's gotta be so scared and confused... I need to talk to him before this all happens if there's any way he can hear me," she added sadly. "I swear I'll walk or hitchhike with the trucker that stopped to help us if I have to. He said he was going as far as Hyattsville… I just need to be there first… to know if I did the right thing!"

"You don't have to be there to know that," he assured. "Besides no matter what happens Jamie would hunt me down and no one would ever find the body if I let you go off like that. This surgery… it's what he would have picked for himself. You know him as well as anyone ever could."

"I know he would have researched everything first, just like he did with this damn car and the electrical system recalls he warned me about," she admitted as she put a hand on her belly and her thoughts shifted to the little lime-sized baby in there and the things that they had just been told about the possible condition it might face. In just one night Jamie had studied the odds, the causes, the reasons for everything behind what they might be facing with their child so he could ask the right questions, plan to provide the best care available or console her over her doubts. For him though, now when he needed her to do the same, she had just frozen and let someone else answer instead. In his time she had failed him on top of everything else. "No matter what happens to any of us, he always takes the time to understand it. I never do that… even when we were riding together. I always let him take the lead, jumped to conclusions… never made the tough calls myself. I don't know if I can do this, Danny. What if it was the wrong thing?… What if something happens to him because of it? I didn't even ask your dad what all the complications could be. What if they're worse? I feel like this is all my fault and I've already let him down."

"Eddie, you know this isn't on you, please don't go there. I do know that's the last thing my little brother would want," Danny assured. "This was an accident and Dad _is_ down there… he makes tough calls all the time and he wanted you to go with this woman doctor. I could tell from the tone of his voice… but he also wanted to respect your place as Jamie's wife. It's never easy to know if you're doing the right thing," he added with a frown as he thought about his current situation with his own spouse. "Especially when you love someone more than you do yourself and you just want them to be okay and happy. Things happen in life that we can't control though, and sometimes it's more about how we cope with them afterwards… Linda and I, we're dealing with that now too, but that's for later," he sighed, not wanting to get into anything else. "We'll make it through, so will you and Jamie. C'mon, it looks like the truck's ready to go," he said while standing up. "We'll get a ride back to the garage and find a car to rent somewhere. I promise," he added just as a silver four-door sedan pulled off to the side of the road in front of them. "You've got to be kidding me," he seethed as he recognized the driver. "What the hell is he doing here?!"

"Hey, there… need a lift?" a familiar voice called out after the passenger-side window rolled down and Eddie and Danny stared back in shock while the man gestured for them to get in the backseat as a small, dark object glinted in his hand. "I think you're headed my way."

###

"The angioembolization is done," Kenzie announced as she walked back into the waiting room in misfitting-sized scrubs that dwarfed her small stature while pulling off the paper footie things covering her Birkenstocks, which while much-loved, were hardly normal attire for her during procedures. "I swear I had more equipment in my pack when I dropped into Tikrit a few years ago than this place keeps on hand, but we improvised and got the bleeding under control," she announced as she looked up and saw only Rick, Frank and Baker there to greet her. "He's got a chest tube in now too, so his lung is fully expanded. Theoretically it will seal itself and we'll be able to take that out before he wakes up all the way and has a few choice words for me because those things tend to hurt like a bugger. They put him in the back where he was before… I want him to have a few more units of blood to get his pressure and levels back up before I take him to the operating room for the leg," she added while looking around. "Is his wife here yet? If she wants the chance to go see him, now would be the time. He might even come to a bit once the anesthesiologist gives him the nerve block I ordered and we can lighten up on the other drugs. I'd ask though that you not try to explain his condition in any detail… doing so might cause more harm than good at this point and it would be better if he remains relaxed and fairly doped up. Otherwise for the OR… if things look promising we'll be in there for probably six to eight hours… if not, two, tops... although that call can come at any time in the procedure so don't read anything into it," she warned. "Hopefully, it's the former though."

"Eddie and my other son Danny have been delayed by car trouble," Frank informed her with regret... at last check the two were still stranded on the side of the highway after waiting for the promised roadside assistance to show up. He knew the best medicine for both his youngest and daughter-in-law would be to talk to each other before the surgery, however at this point it didn't look like that would be possible… at least not face-to-face. "I'd like to go in, though."

"Of course," Kenzie agreed. "Don't expect the warm fuzzies from the staff back there," she warned. "Apparently this guy, McKitrick, is some sort of long-term god here and they're just a wee bit pissed that Uncle Mike called and gave me permission to play with their toys," she explained in a vast understatement regarding the look on the other surgeon's face when the summoned hospital chief of staff received a direct call from the Deputy Surgeon General and Deputy Chief of the Naval Bureau of Medicine and Surgery, Rear Admiral Michael Minton, approving Dr. Charlotte MacKenzie's request for privileges. "Meantime, Rick… if you wouldn't mind, I could use a hand checking to make sure they have what I'll need to stabilize those fractures. If not I might have to send you out for a cup of sugar and a hammer," she smirked at an old joke between them that had once involved him dropping out of a helicopter to deliver much-needed improvised supplies to her in the field.

"Sure," he jumped up to join her, eager to help and have a chance to talk shop to find out more about the protocol she was developing… one that he hoped would save his friend's leg.

"Baker, see if you can get ahold of anyone in the Maryland State Police that might be willing to help Danny and Eddie get here sooner, or at least light a fire under that repair service, please," Frank asked. "And check where Jimmy is at with the investigation. Last I heard he was running into roadblocks with my new friends at the MPDC," he sighed with heavy sarcasm, regretting that ill-timed contentious debate with the DC mayor and police commissioner that had left him on the outs with them when their assistance could be critical in tracking down the driver that had done this to his son. "Plus, I need to keep on top of the storm preparations back at home or the fact that I'm here while that's going down will play out all the wrong way in the press."

"Yes, sir," she acknowledged before hesitating and deciding against advising him of one new development at that moment. "Sir, I will do my best to arrange for alternate transport for Detective and Officer Reagan if they are unable to get a repair made," she promised. "Is there anything else I can do for you?"

"Just offer a pleading prayer," he replied with a heavy sigh and a look down to the ground before turning to stride with conviction into the back to check on his son.

###

"So what's the plan, Kenz?" Rick asked as the pair stood in the surgical supply room sorting through boxes and pulling out needed items. "What exactly are we looking for in here?"

"Standard intramedullary nail for the tibia, proximal interlocking screws…" she rattled off the list in her head as she reviewed Jamie's radiographs from memory. "Plate and screws for fibula… here," she added to their growing pile. "We also need fixation pins, external rods and ring fixators for the femur shaft. See if you can locate those."

"Damn, Kenz… this is a lot of hardware," Rick worried as he searched and took in the scope of their endeavor. "Why go internal for the lower leg and external for the upper? Won't he have a better chance of getting back on his feet sooner with a nail above too?"

"He will get one there when we're back in New York," she answered as she revealed just a little of the process. "But first I need something to stabilize and keep his leg at the same length while we prepare for that. You know in injuries like this the muscles contract and try to bring the bones back together. He's missing a whole section there. Until we prepare and print the matrix, he'll be in one of these. The nail will be inserted through the middle of that for added strength."

"And he'll look like someone that's been attacked by an angry mad scientist with an erector set in the meantime," he sighed. "This will freak him and his family out, especially his wife. All these years and all I've seen it still always creeps me out when those huge screws are drilled through someone's leg from the outside like that and bolted to a frame. How many surgeries is he looking at, Kenz?"

"Three more to start if we get lucky today," she answered. "This one, a bone graft harvest on his hip maybe Monday at this point if we can get him bugged out of here and up to Columbia before the storm, the Humpty Dumpty surgery to put everything back together three days later when the infused matrix is placed. He has a very complex, irregular fracture, so that's another long one," she added. "Today is all about salvage, debridement, stabilizing and trying to restore as much vascular and nerve function as possible. I'm worried about that, Rick. He doesn't seem to have any sensation below the knee… his tibial and peroneal nerves could be torn or severed. If it's too much given that we don't have a first class neurosurgeon available tonight… he's better off without. He'll get a bigger range of motion with a prosthesis, and I can't take a chance of putting him in the study if it's likely… I can't risk known bad outcomes when we're trying to get approval."

"Well, maybe you have changed then," he remarked back tightly in a bit of shock at that from her. "I've never once heard you say you wouldn't give the kid on the table in front of you every consideration. That sounded like something from a pencil-pusher… like Reagan is less important than a black mark on your record. Is that really how you are going into this?"

"I know how it sounds," she admitted while looking away as that admission went against her beliefs at the core, and he knew it. "But if this works it would save thousands, and I owe it to those kids, too. The people from the FDA _are_ pencil-pushers. I can't risk not getting approval from them because I took a bad case, and it didn't work out. I can't believe I'm saying it myself…" she added sadly. "I guess that what happens when you make a deal with the devil though. I will do my absolute best for Jamie in there, Rick," she assured as she put a hand on his shoulder and looked up in his eyes with total promise… they were so close now, he was sure she could feel his own heart was thudding. "Just don't be surprised if I can't pull a rabbit out of the hat this time. There's one other thing that hasn't changed though," she added with a bit of a mischievous light in her smile. "I'm still a little twerp if you hadn't noticed. The last thing I need you to find is a stool so I can reach the operating table… maybe try the janitor's closet for that one, okay?" she offered as despite the situation and the small amount of contention that had just passed between them, he reached down and did something he had been longing to do for years now… offer an initial soft, hesitant, but soon growing passionate kiss on her lips as they stood there alone exploring each other intimately for several tantalizing moments until she pulled away.

"Kenz, I'm so sorry," he murmured, cursing himself for moving so soon, and in a time like this. "This wasn't… I don't know what came over me. I just…"

"I know, it's okay…" she whispered back and stared in his eyes while a wry grin slowly painted her lips. "I've… well, I've honestly wanted to do that myself for a long time now, Corpsman Fellows," she admitted as she played with the buttons on his dress shirt and traced a slow line down his wildly beating chest. "And it was worth the wait, but I need a clear head for this… we'll talk later, alright? I promise," she added as she pushed off. "Let's go, I think we've got everything and hopefully it's gonna be a long night. I need to get started soon."

###

"Hey, there..." a familiar voice cut through the fog in Jamie's brain like a faraway beacon, drawing him back towards it even as a solid wall of pain sought to block him from any desire to move away from the darkness. A small, almost insignificant twitch of his right hand was enough to let Frank know that his son was in some way able to hear him now, but the low involuntary moans that now followed with nearly every breath were disconcerting and had him frowning with renewed concern. He had been told that the anesthesiologist had been by to sign off on whatever Jamie needed to keep him comfortable until the next stage of his surgery, but even to his father's untrained ear those sounds and the fact that the heart rate monitor had jumped significantly in the last few minutes were telling him that his boy was waking up into an increasing level of pain. Still it followed that the broken ribs, and that newly inserted chest tube that Kenzie spoke of were probably the culprits behind this since to his understanding Jamie already had a nerve block to eradicate all sensation to his right leg by this point. He worried that perhaps his son was just growing frustrated or panicked with his inability to communicate anything back effectively since he always had difficulty coming out from under the effects of IV narcotics, so sought to soothe him with quiet talk about the things he knew would concern him.

"Eddie's okay, she's still on her way," he began gently since his wife's whereabouts and safety would surely be first and foremost on Jamie's mind, even above his own situation, although he was not about to get into the fact that the pair were now stranded on the side of a busy highway somewhere outside of Baltimore and likely still waiting for a mechanic to fix the car or tow it away. "She and Danny should be here soon but probably not until after the doctor takes you back to fix your leg. You'll see them when you wake up."

 _Doctor… leg… Eddie's coming. Something bad must have happened,_ Jamie's sluggish and over-drugged brain reasoned as he latched onto those few words, but honestly the last thing he wanted to do right now was to wake up. Something _very bad_ would explain the spear of white-hot agony shooting from his right leg now that was moving through his entire body in increasing warm waves threatening to wipe every other thought out of his head. The hell was his father doing sitting there just watching as someone ripped it off of his body one shredded fiber at a time? The pungent smells surrounding him told him he was in a hospital, but other than a fleeting memory of Joe, he could not remember what had happened. Had he been shot like his older brother? What was Eddie supposed to find when she came? Why couldn't he seem to move anything more than a few fingers on one hand. Panic took over at that thought and he began to feel starved for air as it was impossible to take in a deep enough breath without an added flare of torment on his left side. His eyelids fluttered with false promise and at first an isolated tremor resonated down his arm before another and another as the increased blip on the monitor had Frank worried about Kenzie's contention that he was not to upset Jamie with details before the surgery. The thin sheen of sweat that soon broke out on his son's forehead as his entire body began to tremble was the final straw though and told him without a doubt something was going terribly wrong, however his attempt to catch the attention of the charge nurse on duty in that area failed when she turned away from him at her station and walked out of the unit leaving them completely alone for the moment.

"Jamie… listen to me, it's Dad… I'm right here… son, it's okay… please, I know it hurts and you're scared, but try to relax and breathe easy. You're going to be fine," he urged as his hand reached for his phone in an unwillingness to step out and abandon his youngest as apparently every other staff member in the area had done even as an alarm began to blare as the heart rate numbers climbed closer to dangerous levels. "Baker!" he barked into the device. "Find Kenzie and Rick! Get them in the back now! Something's happening to Jamie!… I think he might be having a heart attack or something and there's no one else here!"

* * *

 _Woah, so lots happening there. Rick and Kenzie finally connected after all of these years while Jamie and the rest of the Reagans can hardly catch a break in this one. I wonder what exactly might happen to Danny and Eddie now that they are in the backseat of that silver sedan that stopped on the side of the road to offer assistance, and if they'll discover it was it driven by a man bent on outright revenge, or perhaps one that casts himself as being there at the right time and place to seem helpful so that he could win the family and Commissioner's trust? Next, Kenzie and Rick discover what's behind her patient's sudden issues and she's forced to weigh the responsibility she feels towards her research and other cases versus the needs of the kid on the table in front of her, in this case one Jamison Reagan._


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter 23

"No, no… it's not a heart attack," Kenzie assured soon after the welcomed sounds of her flopping sandals were heard rushing through the hall and to Jamie's bedside. "C'mon, what's going on with you Sergeant Jamie Reagan?" she muttered while going through a series of rapid-fire checks that weren't adding up. "Not a typical complication… maybe an allergic reaction?… Rick, take a look at the chart and tell me what was used for the femoral nerve block," she asked even as her hands were running up and down the IVs looking for kinks and checking the labels on the various bags that were hanging on the pole. "They've titrated down on the morphine, he should be coming out of this."

"Kenz," Rick warned as he angrily flipped through the notes, not believing what he was reading. "Kenz… he didn't use anything for a block… this guy, Sutter… he didn't do a block! It says here that you ordered the pain meds to be reduced _after_ the anesthesiologist decided to use general only for the surgery. Jamie's coming down off the opiates and he's got nothing for pain management to take their place!"

"HE WHAT?!" she replied angrily before snatching the paperwork from him and reading out loud. "Noted that per Dr. Robert McKitrick's preferences, nerve blocks are only to be administered in patients that are awake or lightly sedated due to risk of neural damage. Patient does not meet that criteria and therefore only general anesthesia is to be used during procedure… what a load of bull!" she fumed. "He'd have to pump him full of general during an extended surgery and I dare him to do a block on a patient that is fully awake with _this_ and not struggle to hit the right target!" she gestured towards Jamie's leg. "I'll have his license for leaving him with no pain control and playing these kind of games!" she promised. "But first we have to fix it before Jamie comes to all the way and I'm not quite sure why he's still out. He should be more responsive by now… hell, almost anyone else would be yelling loud enough to take the roof off the building."

"Reagan always has a hard time waking up from the narcotics," Rick informed from experience as Frank nodded in agreement… the concern for his son's continued state of duress outweighing an urge at the moment to go find this so-called anesthesiologist named Sutter wherever he was and put him up against a wall by the throat.

"All right, so that explains it… he's probably slowly coming out of the fog and getting hit with 10 level pain without being able to respond to it. He's having an anxiety attack," Kenzie reasoned. "Rapid heart rate, chest tightness, shortness of breath, hyperventilation, sweating, and trembling. I swear this whole staff will be looking at sanctions if they try any more of this crap with me. They'll claim a shift change for now I'm sure. Rick, go hunt down one of those nurses and get access to the drug cart… up the morphine again," she advised while scribbling orders on the chart. "I'll be right back. I'm going to find a different anesthesiologist, and I don't care if they have to call somebody in from another hospital… I won't go into the OR with this one and I want a three-in-one femoral nerve block with a peripheral catheter done _now_ if I have to get an ultrasound from up in maternity and drag it down here to place it myself!" she threatened. "Poor guy… I'm sorry this happened to you… stay with us Jamie, and keep talking to him, Commissioner. We've got to try to keep him calm until we can get some drugs back on board. I'm afraid we're going to have to knock him out again as soon as possible."

"Jamie… I wish I knew what to do to help you right now," Frank admitted softly as he found himself unnerved once more to be left alone sitting with his still-stressed son for another few minutes before Rick could be seen dragging back a nurse to the station to open up the drug cart. "Your mother always had the knack for making you feel better whenever something bad happened... and you gave her plenty of practice growing up, didn't you?" he asked as he tried to mimic the soft touches and calming voice she would have no doubt provided, and was grateful to see the heart rate monitor drop by just a tad as he continued. "The two of you would have long conversations even before you were born… I would hear her downstairs talking to you sometimes when she couldn't sleep for worry over losing you all those months, but you were strong then and you'll find that same strength now, I promise you. Back then a hug from momma and a scoop of chocolate ice cream always did the trick, didn't they? She's still with you now, Jamie, and I know she's doing everything she can right now to make this better, but you also have Eddie and Kaylin and another little one on the way who need you to be present… you just keep fighting through this. Doc Kenzie is one determined little spitfire… I'm so glad she's here. She'll have you all fixed up shortly, and then we'll get you home so you can recover there until you're back on your own two feet," he hesitated with a heavy swallow and a rapid prayer that the plural would indeed be the case. "Rest easy, son… when you wake up next time the worst will be over," he advised hopefully as Rick and the nurse were hurrying over to administer the relief Jamie so desperately needed at this point. "Mary, be with him now," he prayed as it took just seconds for Jamie's body to relax down against the bed once more as the drugs ushered him back to the white place where it was not his mother… but rather a vision of Joe and a blue car that continued to haunt him there.

###

A soft buzz in front of him startled Danny back from the half-dead as his head had lolled against the side window of the car while a warm figure with blond hair shifted uncomfortably against him with a soft, restless moan. Eddie had finally succumbed to simple exhaustion a short time ago after the length and stress of the day and he was loath to disturb her until they arrived at their destination wherever that might be. A quick glance through the headrests at the dashboard showed it to be 3:15. He expected that Linda would be wondering where they were by now, and why he hadn't called her as promised when they were anticipated to arrive. The latter was easily explained by the fact that his phone was no longer within his reach while the answer to that first question was not quite as clear since he was surprised to discover the car had left the main highway at some point in the journey and was now traveling down a darkened two-lane road. Damn it… at this point it sure looked like they would have been better taking that lift from the trucker, he frowned. What was this guy up to? he wondered.

"Where are we?" he growled his contentious displeasure softly. If there had been any other option at the time, he would have hardly agreed to climb into this car considering the recent history with this man, but their guard had been down as Eddie had been so desperate to get to the hospital he was fairly certain she was about to act upon her earlier threats of thumbing it down the highway.

"Just passed Langdon," the driver replied. "I used to live down here with my wife… know most of the back ways in although probably didn't need to use it this time of night," he added. "Old habits die hard I guess."

"I bet."

"It's true," the driver replied as he had anticipated Danny's level of distrust and was carefully framing his conversation to take advantage of his years of training in dealing with contentious personalities. "For instance, I bet you wonder why I drive this car," he added to break the silence after a few moments as well as honestly to keep himself awake at this late hour. "My father worked for Oldsmobile all his life, as did his father. So every son in the family had to drive an Oldsmobile… a used one when he started out, a brand-new one if he attained some success. I always looked at the Oldsmobile as a legacy that was forced upon me, that no matter how well I did in life, my reward would be, yes, an Oldsmobile. When they stopped making them in 2004, I couldn't bring myself to stray too far, even though I tried and had the means… so, hence the Buick."

"So that's why you followed us down here tonight… you tried to walk away from what happened with your son and couldn't?" Danny pried in an effort to get behind the man's motive. "You blamed us and the NYPD for all that, but had to come back?"

"I did… I trusted someone else to get the job done, and he failed. Now things got a little more complicated," the older man sighed. "And there's a bigger mess to clean up that I didn't plan on."

"And we're part of that?" Danny asked as he carefully cradled Eddie's head against his shoulder after the car hit a few rough spots. "You think using us like this will let you get close to my father again? He's not gonna go for it even if you seem to be good at uncomplicating things."

"Your father can be a hardass sometimes."

"So I hear."

"Regardless, that wasn't the point of this… it was just good fortune I happened to be in the area at the right time. I was on my way to the hospital myself to tie up those few loose ends before things got out of hand down here. A man has to have pride in his work even if he had other plans or it's his intention to retire to some faraway place when the job is done."

"Well, sorry if my brother's accident somehow inconvenienced you," Danny practically snarled back. "I know you blame a lot of what went down on him… it wasn't his fault, you know… what happened to your son… no more so than my father or me. That was the life he chose."

"It appears to have been the life we have all chosen," the man admitted with deep regret as he turned up the volume of the radio effectively to end the uncomfortable conversation for now while a glance at his clock showed they were about twenty minutes out. "Although it looks like the ride will be over for a few of us soon," he added ominously under his breath.

###

"Commissioner, we're taking him back now," Kenzie advised softly with a hand on Frank's shoulder, causing him to stir from where he sat dozing uncomfortably in a chair next to Jamie's bedside while several nurses and a newly appointed and thoroughly vetted anesthesiologist were packing everything up to move. "His vitals are stronger so we should be getting started. I'm sorry we can't wait any more for his wife and brother to arrive. The longer his circulation and nerves are compromised, the less chance of success we have."

"I understand," Frank replied quietly as he leaned forward and offered his son a kiss on his forehead and a reluctant, affectionate tousle of his hair. "You'll take good care of him," he added with raspy emotion as more of a statement then a question.

"Of course," she promised with a warm smile even as she was doing up her auburn hair in a tight ponytail bun which frankly made her look more like a young schoolgirl rather than an accomplished woman and tough-as-nails surgeon who had courageously followed the bravest soldiers this country had to offer into the line of danger time and time again. "I'll do my best for him. It's easy to see why he's so loved and important to everyone… he's got more good work to accomplish. I'll see to it that you're updated regularly," she added. "Try to get some rest."

"I don't think that's likely anytime soon," he admittedly his hand trailed down for one final squeeze of his son's arm before it slipped away as the gurney started moving. "I'll rest when you do and he can."

"All right, that's a deal," she agreed as they followed the little procession out into the hallway where Rick and Baker likewise jumped to their feet to offer support as Jamie passed and then to Kenzie and Frank, respectively.

"I guess I'm going to owe you dinner for this," Rick smirked as he gave her a light punch on the shoulder. "Knock 'em dead, doc," he added in a morbid tradition that had been held on many missions together.

"Keep 'em at bay, soldier," she smiled and returned a bump of her own and a small wave as Frank, Baker and Rick were stopped at the last set of double doors while the rest continued down the hall before making a hard left and disappearing from sight.

" _We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us,"_ Frank quoted with a breaking voice as he found comfort in both the saying and Baker's arm wrapped around his own while his son was being taken away from him to face a possible life-altering surgery and they waited for Eddie and Danny to arrive... too late now to likewise send him off.

"Joseph Campbell," she finished for him with a nod. "Very well said, sir."

###

"Eddie… Eddie, wake up. I think we're here," Danny advised as his sister-in-law stirred and sat up, blinking rapidly and looking around in confusion before the full weight and details of their situation hit her while the driver pulled the car to a stop.

"Danny!" she cried as she scrambled against him, desperate to get out of the vehicle now. "How could you let me fall asleep?! Do you know what's going on yet?!"

"Baker texted a few minutes ago and said they couldn't wait any longer and just took him back into the operating room," the driver informed with regret as he got out of the car and walked around to open the door and help her out. "I'm sorry, I wish we could have gotten here sooner, but I took the fasted route I knew. Here's your phone Danny… still off. I had it charging the whole time we were driving but it doesn't look like it held. You must have fried the battery somehow."

"Terrific," Danny muttered as he looked at the useless device in his hand with disdain. "I had it plugged into Eddie's car when it died… it only lasted a few minutes afterwards, maybe that had something to do with it. Thanks anyway, Garrett," he managed to choke out as he softened his stance on the man who had been holding a grudge over their family for months now, even after being given every consideration by the Police Commissioner in that time. "I really appreciate, you know… everything you did for us tonight. Do you… uh, happen to know where they are?"

"Fourth floor, surgical waiting room on the East side," Moore answered in his usual efficient manner as he opened the truck and removed their overnight bags. "There you go. I'll be up myself as soon as I go park the car," he added as he closed the lid and watched while Eddie and Danny practically ran into the building before driving back around to find a space in the nearby lot, ironically next to another similar silver sedan with New York license plates and a warm hood as Mason Malevsky had been thwarted by the fortuitous arrival of the dishonored DCPI who had decided to drive down in his own vehicle after Baker had alerted him to the situation with his incapacitated assistant, Weller, and of course the current crisis with Frank's youngest son. Luckily she had communicated to Moore where the pair of Reagans had been stranded along the route, and he had come across them just before Mason had circled back to their location. Undeterred by that missed opportunity, Malevsky had instead continued on his way to the hospital himself, and was now in the building carefully looking for an opening that would afford him a chance to get close enough to Jamie when the time was right while keeping him out from under the watchful Reagan radar as three were now gathered to await news just as the anesthesiologist signaled it was okay to proceed and Dr. Charlotte MacKenzie was pulling back the bandages to take her first unfettered look at the damage done to Jamie's leg before deciding a course of action that would influence the rest of their lives.

"Oh, holy crap," she sighed once more before biting her lip behind the mask and putting her gloved hand out as her path forward was clear in that moment.

"Scalpel."

* * *

 _Ha! So I snuck Garrett back into the picture there a little unexpectedly, no? That whole part was originally written to keep his return a lot more transparent to everyone except Frank before I realized I could string the DCPI's identity out a little longer to make it more fun for the rest of us. While most are grateful for his help at this point that doesn't necessarily mean a certain Commissioner will be pleased to see his former close advisor arrive. Will Frank accept assistance from his old friend, or has that ship sailed now that he's facing a crisis with his own son? Next, Eddie is forced to cope with the fact there's nothing left for her to do but wait until an overheard conversation pushes her into panic mode thinking she made a terrible mistake in trusting Jamie's life and limb to Doc Kenzie, and that growing fear will unfortunately make things more difficult for everyone involved including our lovebirds as events unfold._

 _For Guest2017 and the request for the Hood Ornament Snapshot, that's been an outline forever now and will be tied into Mary's passing, along with the Henry/Betty story I have been planning, but they will both be long ones and this story has taken on a life of it's own so I don't feel like I'm in place to take a big break from it just yet. They will come eventually though. Thanks for asking!_


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24

"Eddie, you look exhausted… please, now come here," Baker worried as her ingrained motherly instincts kicked in and she guided the crying younger woman over to the couch in the waiting area and sat her down. "When's the last time you ate anything?" she asked kindly while taking in her upset state, having just been informed by Frank that they were indeed too late… that Jamie had already been taken into the operating room and was off limits for as much as the next eight or more hours so there was nothing for her to do but sit and wait for news with the rest of them.

"I don't know; I'll get something later," Eddie sniffed as huge tears continued to roll down her cheeks from her pained blue eyes.

"Well, I'm not sure what's available in the cafeteria at this time of night or morning, rather, but I'm going to find you some decaf tea immediately and have some breakfast items delivered in from outside if I have to," Baker assured. "Commissioner Reagan has been on a hunger strike as well, but we're going to be here for a while," she added optimistically. "And all we have to do now is pass the time so I'm not going to hear any more of it from either of you," she vowed. "Just stay here and try to relax. Dr. MacKenzie has promised to provide regular updates, and Jamie is in the best of hands with her," she assured as she stepped out to make her way down the hall, pausing for an apologetic glance at her boss who had been none too pleased to discover exactly who she had drafted to bring Eddie and Danny in behind his back. "Hi, Garrett," she greeted her friend and coworker as he sheepishly joined the group after getting off the elevator.

"Hey," he replied back as he purposefully took a seat near Frank and watched her quickly disappear.

"Please don't ask me how I'm doing," came the gruff order from a very tired voice.

"I wasn't planning to. I brought you a fresh shirt and a dopp kit," Garrett replied in a familiar way as he set the item down on the floor. "I keep one in the car," he explained. "And remember, I'm like a rabbit's foot in hospitals. I always bring good luck."

"Thank you, but I think I've heard that before," Frank huffed.

"So, how you doing?"

"I told you not to ask me that," the Commissioner growled back. "How am I doing? It's my son, Garrett… and I think maybe that's one conversation that you and I are not ready to have yet. Besides, I thought you were supposed to be unavailable at this time."

"You're right… that should probably be a topic for later," Moore replied with a somber tone in his voice as he gazed down at the tiles on the floor. "Some things came up, Frank… things that have maybe changed my perspective about the course I was ready to take, but I was happy to help out when Baker called and asked me to bring Eddie and Danny in while I was on the way down after I heard about Weller," he offered contritely.

"Well, that would be the first time you were happy to do anything for me in months," Frank responded coldly with dark, brooding eyes as his patience for all matters regarding his DCPI was thoroughly worn away by this point and his feelings at the moment would not be mitigated by such a small act of penance. "If you'll excuse me, I'm sure Danny wants to be updated as to where we stand with the investigation."

"And where is that if I may ask?"

"Absolutely nowhere, which should sound somewhat familiar," Frank revealed with great agitation as he got up and walked off in the direction of his oldest son who had been speaking to Rick about the very same matter.

"So no one saw anything?" Danny demanded as his father walked up to the other two men. "What about the cameras? Did they pull the feeds? Who's in charge?"

"I put Jimmy on it, but he's running into roadblocks," Frank replied before shedding a bit more light on exactly why that might be happening. "He's been speaking with a Detective Fowler, but... I may or may not have alienated the DC mayor and police commissioner with my views on threat assessment and terroristic threats at the conference meeting yesterday afternoon," he admitted with a raised eyebrow and a regrettable twitch of his mustache.

"Seriously?" Danny griped with a shake of his head and his typical stress tell of a hand running over his head. "Aye yi yi… you know that's the second time already today I've heard my old man is a hardass? So now what are we going to do?"

"That's for later… Jimmy will be by in the morning with whatever he's been able to find out. For the next few hours all that's left is to say a prayer… and right now God goes by the name of Charlotte MacKenzie," Frank replied as he pulled his son over by the back of the neck for a hug.

###

"God, some of these blood vessels look like overcooked spaghetti," Kenzie sighed as she debrided an area near the worst part of the fracture which had obviously sustained the brunt force of the impact from the car. "Too bad we couldn't sautée them over low heat with a little olive oil and crisp them up," she muttered to herself. "What? Works every time in my kitchen. Don't quote me on that outside this room... I'm not Hannibal Lecter you know, and I hate Chianti for the record," she added with a flippant eye to her amused scrub nurse, another import from a different shift. "Alright, so you're not going to make this easy on me, are you Sergeant Reagan? We're looking at a bypass and some grafts to get you perfused again. Your buddy Rick is so going to owe me big time for this one and I'm craving an extra large order Bangkok Pepper Shrimp right now… did anyone get the memo that I'm hungry?"

###

"I think it's pretty bad, Lin," Danny revealed quietly from down the hall after borrowing his father's phone to make the call to his wife. "The whole thing with the car… plus my phone dying. We got here too late. Eddie's really upset she didn't get to see him before he went in, but from the sound of it… that was probably for the best. Dad said what they did to him… well he couldn't even bring himself to tell her about it for now. It's blatant malpractice… we could sue."

"I can't believe any staff at any hospital would be that blindly loyal to some surgeon that they would risk something like that," Linda replied while shaking her head and stirring some creamer into her coffee at the early morning hour as she sat at their kitchen table back in Staten Island, knowing there would be no going back to sleep now. "We're taught to put the patient first from day one. Poor Jamie… that's just awful. I hope he doesn't remember any of it after all this is over."

"Well, I hope that big brain and damn elephant memory of his remembers the accident… it sounds like that's all we'll have to go on… no other witnesses. Jimmy called Dad and said the cameras were down in that whole sector because of some computer glitch at the time. Figures, right? I swear, if I didn't know better it's almost like someone planned this… no one gets this lucky. Jamie needs to give us something… the make and model of the car, license plate, description of the driver… anything, because the Reagan name definitely has no pull down here," he added angrily. "Between the hospital and the DC cops… no one is looking to make this any easier on him or us and we're sure as hell not getting any special treatment."

"Danny, watch what you wish for," Linda warned. "You of all people know what PTSD is like and It's terrible to hope that Jamie has to relive something like that over and over again. I'm sure it was terrifying for him," she reminded as she considered her own situation with the shooting at the hospital and the anxiety and many nightmares it produced. "He might be better off without it… So you catch this guy, what is it going to matter to him right now? He's got to focus on himself. If what you've said about his leg is true… Danny, he's looking at intense rehab even if the surgery goes well, and with his other injuries… he'll need a lot of help to get around, plus they have steps at their house so he's going to have to stay downstairs. This is going to affect their lives for months and months either way, and with Eddie being pregnant on top of it… she's going to have to watch herself too. Have there been any updates?" she asked worriedly. "You said this Dr. Kenzie was supposed to send someone out with news… how long has it been?"

"About an hour and a half, Lin," he answered with some amount of dread as he glanced at the clock which was coming up on five-thirty. "She said if… if she had to it would take two, but that could come at any time."

"So for now, no news is good news, right? I'm praying for him… I'll stop by the chapel on the way into work and light a candle. Let me know as soon as you can. I love you Daniel Reagan."

"I love you more, Linda Reagan."

###

"Well, I'm satisfied with that level of pink," Kenzie admitted as she carefully observed the results of her last few hours of vascular repairs. "Not perfect, but acceptable for now and we've got a better pulse down here. No sign of compartment syndrome. That means we get to move on to the next step. Susan, you look like you could use a break," Kenzie dismissed the sole remaining holdout from Dr. McKitrick's team that she had not replaced with other staffing. "Please go out and inform the family, and the rest of you… let's get that hardware prepped and ready to go in the meantime. Next comes the nail, screws, reaming and drilling so if something like that gets to you, slap a couple of earplugs in and hum a few bars of your favorite song. Prepare for a suprapatellar approach in the semi-extended position, please… we need to tackle the tibia first because I'm going to externally fix the femur straight over the knee for the time being when I'm done, and let's hope that nerve comes back to us when we straighten this out," she ordered with a sigh and a look at the clock… just a few minutes before seven. Nearly three hours had passed, and she regretted not sending someone out earlier as promised, but in her typical fashion a complete focus on the patient in front of her had consumed all other thoughts… well, almost. "So _are_ there any good Thai places in this area that are open at this time of day? I'm serious, people!"

###

"Pop wants to know how you're holding up, sweetheart," Frank inquired as he hung up the phone and moved over to sit next to Eddie on the couch, pulling her against his shoulder for a hug as she sat staring blankly ahead in an exhausted daze. "He's worried, but said he doesn't understand how the two of you ever manage to sleep in the same bed as Kaylin, or why Bear chooses to stay there… that she's like a little wildcat under the covers, flipping and turning and kicking. He said he barely slept at all and got a pair of feet in his face a couple of times before finally giving up and sitting in the chair next to her for the rest of the night."

"She does that when she's upset and having bad dreams," Eddie revealed sadly. "Jamie… he's the only one that can settle her when she gets that way. I think sometimes she's back in that car trapped upside down and terrified. His was the first voice she heard, and she latched onto him. I try, but I can never seem to help her through that like he can. Oh, Frank… what if he isn't here do that for her anymore?" she cried into his shoulder. "This baby needs him too… I can't do this by myself!"

"And you won't have to, honey," Frank assured with another squeeze. "That I can promise you. We're going to get through this just like he will… one step at a time, and right now that just means waiting until we get word that everything's going well," he declared optimistically. "Speaking of which…" he added while spotting a nurse emerging from the hall. "Here it comes," he warned as they both stood to greet her when she emerged from behind the double doors, and Danny quickly stepped over to join them so Eddie was supported on either side.

"Mrs. Reagan? Commissioner? Dr. MacKenzie asked me to come out and speak with you," the nurse called from the doorway as everyone else in the waiting room attached to the situation also jumped up from various stages of sleep and quiet reflection while holding their collective breath. "So far, so good," she revealed simply as all sighed with relief in unison. "Things are taking a bit longer than anticipated, but we are still moving forward and Jamison has remained stable throughout."

"You said things are taking longer than they should," Eddie asked intently, trying consciously now to be more proactive and a better advocate for her husband just as he would be for her. "What things?"

"Well, I'm sorry… maybe I shouldn't have put it that way," the longtime military nurse admitted a bit curtly. "I'm used to scrubbing in with Dr. McKitrick, and he seems to run a tighter ship. Dr. MacKenzie took a great deal of time with some artery grafts, but she seems rather pleased with herself for the way they turned out, so…" the older woman trailed off with more than just a hint of contempt in her voice for this redheaded upstart that had swept in and took over command like it was her own right.

"Doc Kenzie is one of the most accomplished vascular and orthopedic surgeons Navy Med has ever seen," Rick bristled at the insinuation. "If she was pleased with it, that means it was done right for damn sure!"

"Yes, you're probably correct," Susan tried to soften as she now had quite a few pairs of eyes staring at her with unveiled contempt at the moment. "I just anticipated more progress by this point," she insisted while continuing to flounder along though.

"Well, yeah… your boss was just planning to off the leg in the first place, so I guess you'd be punching out about now if he was in charge in there," Danny couldn't help but chip in angrily. "And for the record, my wife is a nurse and a damn good one at that, so pardon me for saying that I anticipated more respect and consideration for my brother and his family from the staff here at this point!… Was she for real?" he demanded after the woman excused herself tightly after that comment and walked away.

"This place is filled with the reasons Kenzie left her post," Rick sighed as he slumped back down on a chair. "They must have assigned them all here to see out their last days. The Corps is topped off with lifers like that," he admitted. "The old guard never likes the new blood with better ideas, especially women. No wonder why she got out."

"I… I need to go use the restroom," Eddie admitted blankly as she suddenly sagged… that interchange had just drained her last bit of resolve for the time being and left her feeling nauseous. One thing was obvious, Jamie was being tended to by people she didn't know or frankly trust, and everyone seemed to have their own agenda that did not include taking the very best care of the love of her life.

"Baker!" Frank called to his assistant, intending to have her be an escort as he was instantly worried that Eddie had gone three shades paler even after receiving what appeared to be good news. "Sweetheart, are you alright?" he asked as he turned his attention back to his daughter-in-law. "Can we get you anything?"

"I'm fine," Eddie replied, not wanting to cause a fuss. "I just feel a little sick to my stomach..."

"Bring her down to the empty room across from the nurse's lounge at the end of the hall," the one kindly and sympathetic resident at the desk offered when she noticed the instant ring of concern reflecting around the young woman. "There's a bed she can lay down on and a bathroom for some privacy. It's quiet and out of the way so we use it in between shifts all the time, but no one's in there now."

"Thank you," Frank accepted the gesture. "I think that sounds like a good idea, don't you, Eddie? Let's get you somewhere more comfortable. You've been up most of the night and shouldn't be trying to do this on little catnaps in your condition. I promise we'll come get you if there's any other news in the meantime, okay? Jamie will have my head if he hears that I wasn't looking after you properly, and we don't want that do we?" he cajoled as she relented and they soon had her settled laying down on her side with some ginger tea and crackers on a tray nearby.

"Now if you need anything, you call me or Baker and we'll come in an instant," Frank assured as he laid her phone down next to her and turned off the wall switch so that just the ambient light from the hallway was coming through the doorway. "Try to get some rest, sweetheart. He's made it through the first hurdle, but he'll need you to be there for him when he comes out of this and that won't be for a while yet so now's the time to get some sleep."

"Could you leave the door open?" she sniffed as he made his way out, suddenly feeling like her own little daughter needing a daddy to comfort her from bad dreams. "I just… don't want to be that alone," she admitted.

"Of course," Frank replied gently. "I'll be back to check on you myself in a few minutes. We're just going to be sitting in the lounge going over storm reports. It looks like the city is going to be hit with a substantial snow event early Saturday morning."

"Oh, well you better make sure the RMPs are loaded with extra sand and salt and the guys have blankets in the trunks…" she murmured and closed her eyes as Jamie's inevitable words of concern for his platoon lulled her towards a fitful sleep.

###

"So what was it like being in the same operating room as the great one?" a catty comment cut unexpectedly through the darkened air as Eddie's eyes immediately popped open a few hours later and a glance around reminded her of where she was as she pushed herself up into a sitting position, continuing to listen intently as a conversation drifted in from the adjacent nurse's lounge.

"You mean 'the most accomplished vascular and orthopedic surgeon Navy Med has ever seen?'" came the haughty reply from a voice she recognized to be that of the nurse who had delivered the first news on the surgery. "What a joke. That idiot must be doing her on the side to be that blind."

"Well, I heard that Sutter is already on the blocks with the chief of staff and facing suspension… doesn't that go figure? He does his job the right way, she messes up the orders and screws him over so she doesn't look bad in front of the great New York City Police Commissioner. His kid should have coded right there when his heart rate maxed out and then it would have been her ass getting her license pulled for leaving him like that with no pain meds. It was her fault anyway for not bothering to read the chart I heard."

"Figures. Well you ought to hear her back in the OR. Cracking jokes about food all the time… comparing fixing blood vessels to frying spaghetti and telling us to put earplugs in if the sound of the bit going through bone gets to us. I'm glad she decided to send me out of there. You should see what she's planning on doing to that leg… it's only hanging on there by some muscle and a couple of tendons and a big section of femur is missing. She must really love that drill, too. He's gonna have more screws and pins popped through there than the addition to my house, and for what? That guy's gonna be a cripple for the rest of his life," she declared as Eddie's eyes filled with tears and she started breathing rapidly while all the blood drained from her face.

"No he won't," the other voice asserted. "You ever seen anyone come back from trying to save that? Ten bucks says the leg is off or he's in the morgue within a week, and the family will probably be blaming us when he blows a pulmonary embolism or goes septic. Get ready for a lawsuit. Why do you think McKitrick was ready to amputate? But no… this little hot shit with a top-ranking uncle thinks she knows better than someone with his experience and she sold it to a privileged family that only wants their perfect son back."

"Yeah, well then they get what they deserve for letting him be a guinea pig in some study… we all know who gets the benefit of something like that, and it won't be this guy for sure. Hope he has some kind of disability insurance if he makes it."

"His family has to be rich… follow the money," the other nurse agreed. "Right into Dr. Charlotte MacKenzie's pockets. What a scammer. See you tomorrow, Susan."

"Hey, wait up… I was dismissed, remember? I'll walk out with you."

The sound of their footsteps retreating down the hallway was the last thing Eddie remembered hearing before she found herself on her knees in the bathroom retching up every last meager bit of food she had managed to take in since that terrible phone call had come the previous evening as the guilt and full stress of the situation collided in her mind with those gruesome details. She had failed him… and now his very life was in danger because of it. They were right, she had just wanted her perfect husband back.

"Oh, Jamie… I'm so sorry," she sobbed to herself hysterically. "I should have never…"

What she failed to notice at all in her grief was the little smile on an orderly's face outside her room as he adjusted a wig and hid a few supplies in a nearby closet for safekeeping before closing it securely with a set of keys lifted from a man who would never be heard from again. Maybe his plan to torture the Reagans for a time wasn't dead in the water… or on the operating table just yet, he thought and hummed a happy tune as he made his way past the open doorway and walked by the lounge so close to the hated Frank Reagan he could have reached out and touched him had it not been for that ever present member of his detail, Detective Abigail Baker.

* * *

 _Poor Eddie, she sure got hit at a vulnerable time there and unfortunately that little seed of doubt in Kenzie's motives and skill will only continue to grow as Jamie makes it through surgery as we all knew he would… duh, how else would he have ended up alone and stuck on that hillside? Next up, Danny inserts himself into the investigation which will have far-reaching consequences in his own personal life while Kenzie confesses to Rick that maybe she did indeed carry things too far in an effort to further her study._

 _Also thanks to all those reviewing and reading! You guys make my day!_


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 25

"So basically what the two of you are telling us is you have NOTHING and no plan to do ANYTHING about it!" Danny snapped as he paced around lounge area where he and his father were meeting with Frank's lead detail man, Detective Nucifero, and the assigned DC Detective, William Fowler, regarding the status of the investigation which seemed to be spinning nowhere. As usual, Baker and Garrett were in attendance, but both sensed that it was wise in this instance to stay out of the fray, at least for the time being.

"Danny, keep your voice down! I don't want you waking Eddie," Frank warned, not knowing at the moment that his daughter-in-law was already up and making herself ill over what was overheard down the hall from the pair of nurses passing by them at that very minute.

"How can my brother get run down in the middle of a busy street in a city like this and you sit there and tell me there's not one traffic cam or ATM or security camera that caught this guy either before or when he was fleeing the scene? No one else was on the block?"

"All of our metro traffic cams in that sector were down from 4:08 that afternoon until well after this incident," Detective Fowler reported. "The tech department was uploading updated software trying to get ahead of the storm and it failed for unknown reasons," he put it bluntly. "Most of the businesses in that district were closed overnight. I'll have a team of unis recanvass the area starting at nine this morning to see if they turn anything else up. As of this point, that's all we have except for a bit of broken glass that will be sent to forensics… looks like it could have come from the headlight… might point us to a make of car, but that's all."

"So what is the plan going forward?" Frank demanded.

"That's it. Recanvass and wait for the forensics. Listen, I don't know how you do things up in the Big Apple, but down here this district only has one investigator devoted to hit-and-run accidents and you're looking at him. No witnesses… nothing to go on… it gets filed, I move onto something I can solve with the limited resources I have and you hope for the best."

"Jesus, that's beautiful... doesn't your arm get sore throwing things in the cold case can that fast?!" Danny continued to fume. "My brother is still in surgery… you haven't even interviewed him and yet it sounds to me you've already dumped it. Jamie has an eidetic memory… did anyone ever teach you what that means? He can give you every detail of what he saw… like it gets burned in his brain. It's what makes him a great cop and it would be nice if he got a little damn support from his supposed brothers in blue down here!"

"Well, for his sake I hope that's the case. If he remembers anything when he wakes up, give me a call. Here's my card," Fowler offered while Danny glared at him before snatching it out of his hand. "My best to him and your family."

"Thanks for nothing!" the oldest brother barked back, hardly noticing the orderly across the hall who appeared to be engrossed in checking files on a rolling computer station. "Nothing!" he repeated as the DC detective retreated. "THEY GOT NOTHING, DAD! Not one effing clue as to who did this to Jamie… and he just wants us to accept that! WELL I WON'T!" he warned. "I swear if I have to stay down here and do it myself I'll find the guy that did this and bury him! If he thinks he can get away with it, he hasn't met me yet!" he asserted as a tiny wry smirk tugged at the corner of the orderly's lip. Perhaps the game was on after all, and Daniel Reagan might prove to be an interesting target while he left the younger one suffer a bit and continued to take action to drive that little blond irritant towards breaking. Maybe Matthew hadn't screwed up so much as he had first thought, not that he wouldn't find the back of his father's hand across his face at a later time just to remind him about it though.

"Danny, calm down now before you wind up being admitted here yourself for stroking out," Frank warned as he rubbed his own aching temples. "That's the last thing we need. I don't have a lot of pull down here, obviously. We're fighting the MPDC, the weather and the fact that they botched the investigation from the get go… I was there… patrol never bothered to contain the scene until after we left, any potential witnesses were lost, half of them will probably check out of their rooms before their damn canvass decides to knock on doors."

"I had some of the men go through the hotel unofficially last night," Detective Nucifero revealed. "That was my first thought as well. We were able to hit all the halls with access to that side of the building. Sorry boss, we didn't come up with anything either. The hotel relies on the corner traffic cam for exterior security in the front other than the camera pointed directly at the entrance door. There was a possible reflection in the glass registered at the time of the incident… I had it sent up to TARU to see if they could work any magic, but frankly, sir, there wasn't much there. It was cold out and the dinner hour… most people were off the street eating at that time or in the building. MPDC never even got the name of the driver that stopped first after Jamie was hit in front of him. He also left the scene. That would have been our best shot for a description or a potential plate."

"I'm telling you, _Jamie_ is our best lead," Danny insisted with frustration since no one else appeared to share his viewpoint or faith in his brother at that point. Had he seen youngest sibling's condition prior to this conversation, it was doubtful he would still have the same belief. "You'll see that when he wakes up. He'll give us something so Fowler won't have cause to just sink this case."

"A little outside influence might help," Garrett broke into the conversation for the first time, having sat uncharacteristically quiet for longer than usual. "An article in the Post highlighting the MPDC's lack of interest in solving a crime against a fellow NYPD officer… perhaps shared with a sister publication down here to get the word out and ask for the public's assistance for information."

"That could blow back and look like I'm using the power of my office to influence another department," Frank frowned and let out a heavy sigh. "It better be a hell of a lot more subtle than that," he ordered his gray-haired advisor with a knowing look. "I want to keep this quiet back at home, so just run something here, and I want to sign off on it first."

"On it, boss," Garrett jumped to his feet, relieved to have finally gotten a positive response to his presence down there since he felt a good deal of guilt himself for the current situation between the two police commissioners and the DC mayor, not to mention the strife between him and Frank had revolved around Jamie to a large degree, and now… well it was hard not to feel sorry for that given the circumstances.

"Baker, if you wouldn't mind, would you please go look in on Eddie?" Frank asked as she nodded and got up to make her way down the hall while he checked his watch. "Nine o'clock," he informed them. "Two hours since the last update from the OR. Let's hope we get more good news soon," he worried even as his assistant was finding his son's greatest love collapsed on the floor in the bathroom convinced that she had selfishly made the wrong decision for her husband, and a nondescript orderly was walking off in the opposite direction preparing to continue this game of cat and mouse under the Commissioner's very well-mustached nose.

###

"How's he doing there, Skip?" Kenzie asked with a hint of worry in her voice after a warning beep sounded on the monitor and she glanced up to see what was the matter.

"Oxygen stat's dropping a little," the substitute anesthesiologist informed her as he quickly adjusted the gas levels flowing into Jamie's endotracheal tube and the sounds stopped. "Might want to shoot a chest film and make sure that pneumothorax is still reduced or we don't have a tension on our hands."

"Alright, let's get that done, and watch for any signs of tachycardia," she agreed as she stepped back down and off her stool to stretch for a few moments. "Take a bilateral one of the tibia too while you're over there so I can confirm the nail and pins are in place before we plate the fibula," she requested while the tech moved in to do the imaging. "Boy, this is a whole lot easier when you get to see what you're doing and not operating under a Humvee with shells dropping around you," she observed.

"Have you seen action recently?" Rebecca, her new and admirably skilled scrub nurse inquired.

"Not for a couple of years," Kenzie admitted. "I've been in the lab and setting up my clinic recently, but just started operating again a few weeks ago. Haven't built up the endurance for it yet though," she added while trying to work a few more cramps out of her neck. "Sergeant Jamie Reagan is taking me to task on that and making me work for my dinner, aren't you? Hang in there… I know we're taking our time here with you. What's it say, Skip?" she asked.

"Looks good," he confirmed.

"Sort of," Kenzie frowned when she took a look at the leg x-rays a few moments later. "I'm still worried about the nerve function. He's got damage to the tibial nerve here from the fracture site," she pointed. "But I think we might be okay there, eventually. Now that we've reestablished better blood flow and straightened a few things out by realigned those bones it seems more stretched than torn. It's this one that has me concerned, though," she added while pointing more to the side of Jamie's leg. "This is where he took the hardest impact from the front bumper and the peroneal runs right through there. That's at a pretty high point… usually with today's vehicles you're looking at a strike much lower unless it was an SUV. At the moment though it seems like he might need some kick-ass neuro work to graft that back together. There's so much swelling in that area right now… I can't tell exactly and that's way above my pay grade, plus even with the best results it can be disappointing," she sighed. "Up to a twenty-four-month recovery time, or worst case he loses sensation and control of his foot and lower leg," she fretted. "Or maybe he suffers from constant pain and weakness down there. Crap," she hemmed. "Was an easier choice when I thought the tibial was gone too. Now we need to make a decision or go all in and fix the femur or all out and call it."

"You still think you can fix the bone?" Rebecca questioned. "That's so amazing! I really wish I could be involved in more surgeries like that. Sometimes at this hospital..." she trailed off. "We just can't. This is my last week here though. I've finished my active duty requirements."

"I _know_ I can fix that bone," Kenzie replied confidently as she processed that admission and tucked it away for later considering this nurse had an easy and confident manner in the OR and she had an opening for such a person up in New York, but that was for later… there were too many other things to be concerned about at the moment. "What I don't know right now is if I should."

###

"Hey, baby," Eddie sniffed as she curled up alone on another couch down the hall… grateful for some distance from everyone else since she had been virtually smothered by the family after that breakdown in the bathroom and a subsequent somewhat fiery 'discussion' with her father-in-law about the merits of keeping things about Jamie's condition from her. An hour, multitudes of assurances from everyone attached to the family that she had done the correct thing for her husband, half a box of tissues and a good talk with a sympathetic grandfather-in-law over the phone had her glued back together again, at least for the time being. Word had come out from the back a short time ago that things were still proceeding forward for now, but that there had been some minor complications with Jamie's oxygen and heart rate that were slowing the progress which threatened to send Eddie into another tailspin, but she had gritted her teeth and maintained her composure. Now, though it was time to contend with a little girl who had been promised a talk with her daddy that morning… one who was still completely out of reach at this point. "Did Auntie Erin make you your favorite breakfast for you?"

"I not 'ungry," was the sad report. "My tummy hurt. Where Daddy, p'ease?"

"Daddy's still sleeping, baby," Eddie tried to assure without getting into the details of exactly why that was but knowing that an upset and precocious Kaylin would not be satisfied with a simple answer and if she was allowed to think about it too hard Henry and Erin just might have some more hysterics on their hands, so more details were quickly added before things got to that point. "He had a very long night, so he's really tired and the doctor isn't quite done making him better, but hopefully she will be soon, and then he'll sleep a little longer before he wakes up and we get to talk to him, okay?"

"But Pop Pop promised me to talk to 'im," came the quivering reply.

"I know he did," Eddie tried to soothe before the waterworks started again with either of them. "Sweetie, Pop Pop really thought you would be able to do that this morning when he said you could, but it just seems that things are taking longer than we thought, and for now we just have to what?... be patient and wait. I know that's something that you and I usually have to work on, right? Mommy, Grandpa and Uncle Danny… we're all still waiting to see Daddy too. I promise just as soon as he can he will call and talk to you, but I can't tell you when that will be because the yucky medicine they gave him makes him sleepy just like when you got stung by the wasps at the soccer game and you and Uncle Danny slept together on the couch almost all afternoon, remember? We had to wake you both up to eat supper and you still couldn't keep your eyes open at the table. That's how Daddy is right now baby; he's just sleeping while the medicine and the doctor are helping him."

"Him have a big boo-boo?"

"Yes, baby. It's a very big boo-boo, but we'll help him make it all better. Mommy and Daddy love you Kaylin Elizabeth, and hopefully this will all be over and we'll both be home soon."

###

"It's over," came the two most feared, yet welcomed words in the Reagan family vocabulary at nearly two o'clock that afternoon, with Jamie's surgery running just short of ten full hours by that point, but the soft smile it was delivered with soon alleviated their worst fears. "He's on his way to recovery, but it will be some time before we have him situated and allow anyone back there to visit," the far more considerate, but now very tired-looking scrub nurse, Rebecca, informed them. She had stayed with Kenzie throughout the entire procedure, fascinated by this woman surgeon's work. "The doctor needs a few minutes herself, but she asked to meet the family in the conference room… that's 410 straight down that hall there in about a half hour so she can go over what was done and the postoperative expectations for his care for at least the next few days or so."

"Thank God in heaven," Frank murmured as he rubbed his tired face, feeling the rough, uncharacteristic stubble there and suddenly very thankful for that dopp kit Garrett had managed to provide… a gesture that did generate some appreciation for his long-time advisor now that the crushing weight of fear for his son's life had been somewhat lifted from his chest. A much-needed trip to the men's room for a meeting with a razor was due in short order.

"So he… I mean he still has his…" Eddie managed to stumble out, still unwilling to let herself go to the place where Jamie had managed to keep his leg for fear it was all a cruel joke and they would be informed as such in this family meeting. "It's still there, right?"

"Yes," the nurse nodded as she rubbed her tired shoulder and neck muscles with one hand. "As Dr. MacKenzie will explain though there's some temporary external fixation devices on it now, which can look overwhelming and scary when you first see them, but she has a plan and a timetable to deal with those. Jamie had a few rough patches in the latter part of the surgery where he required some additional anesthesia, so it might be some time before he comes back to us."

"But he's stable now, right?" Eddie continued with an uneasy feeling that the next shoe was about to be dropped. "That doesn't mean anything's wrong, does it?"

"No, ma'am," Rebecca assured. "It's not uncommon after such a long surgery. It's very taxing on the patient, but he did well considering."

"You said Kenz needed time?" Rick asked on the same line of thought while trying to mask a puzzled look and tone from Eddie as that revelation had left its own seed of doubt gnawing at him.

"Yes, sir," the nurse responded. "As I said it was quite a long surgery, and she just needed to recharge and grab a quick cup of coffee. I'm sure she'll be out shortly."

"I think we all need a moment to regroup," Frank agreed. "I know I do. So as she asked we'll meet down in that room in a few minutes. Eddie, let's get you situated in there with something to eat since I will not have you or my future grandchild go without after a day like today. Danny, why don't you give Linda, Pop and Erin a call and let them know he's out and tell them I'll touch base later when we know more."

"Yeah, okay… I'll go do that," Danny agreed as he palmed his new replacement phone, delivered on-site courtesy of a certain very thorough NYPD assistant.

"Commissioner, I'll join you in a few minutes if that's alright," Rick inquired, determined to settle something in private before that. "I know it's a family matter now…"

"No, of course. Rick," Frank assured. "You're Jamie's friend… _our_ friend that we owe an enormous debt of gratitude because frankly we wouldn't have gotten to this point without you. You need to be included although I hope you still intend on going ahead with the House Committee presentation if you feel up to it. As I understand you're due there at 4:00. We'll have a car waiting to take you back to the hotel by 3:00 to change, and while it isn't ideal for you to tackle something like that given the circumstances, Jamie wouldn't have it any other way. He told me several times this week that you were to be in charge of that, anyway."

"Thank you, sir. I… yes, sir... I should try to do that… we worked so hard on it," Rick conceded with a nod as he watched the rest of the party disburse on their assigned tasks before he turned around to hit the wall button and stride through those double doors marked 'Authorized Personnel Only,' on a mission of his own to find Kenzie and figure out just what the hell had gone wrong.

* * *

 _So, Rick knows Kenzie pretty well, and it appears that he's got a sense maybe there's something amiss. Next, our newest set of lovebirds have a revealing chat about that before the rest of the Reagans discover what upcoming challenges Jamie might be facing, and finally we get that Jamko reunion we've been waiting for… or do we? Maybe not quite yet. Another long chapter to follow with a flash forward to the present to start us off as our hero gets his first bit of hope if he can hold onto it._


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter 26

 _March 14, 2:30 am_

" _Eddie, please… c'mon baby, where are you? M'm trying so hard, but I need something to hold onto… m'm not even halfway there yet," Jamie's tired mind pleaded for a reason to stay connected even as he was already starting to drift. The clouds had cleared initially and the dropping temperatures were depositing a heavy frosty blanket over the ground on the entire hillside which sparkled in the moonlight creating a magical spectacle that were it not for the fact it was slowly sapping the life out of him, would have been exquisitely beautiful. A glance down at his black coat revealed that it too was beginning to glisten as ice formed on the outside, the high-tech insulation thankfully still doing its duty though and keeping it at bay, at least for the moment. He slowly brushed his hand across it, wiping a steak in the crystals. "Funny, it looks just like sugar," he marveled as his brain blurred and his head sank back against the ground while he wiped his damp glove over his dry, cracking lips, seeking a sweet taste. Nothing... but this reminded him of something, what was it now? That story Rigs regaled him with the night he found him collapsed on the floor in the rehab gym, ready to give up after he had failed once more at something so simple… that damn one-sided recumbent bike. No matter how hard he had tried, he just couldn't force himself to push that pedal over the apex to make one effing revolution on its own. One. He had gone from training for a full marathon to being unable to lift his leg with any muscle coordination while forcing his toes front and back enough to achieve one effing rotation on this goddamn instrument of unholy torture and had drug himself off of it in frustration only to remain lying there in a puddle of sweat ready to give up on everything since all that effort had obviously been in vain, anyway. Now he was stuck there, too exhausted to generate the energy required to crawl back up into the wheelchair. Kaylin had learned to pedal the tricycle she had received from Erin and Nicki at Christmas in like twelve seconds flat. At this rate he knew he was never ever going to get back to any point close to his formerly damn-near perfect life._

" _You comfortable, Reagan?" Rigsby's voice had come through the doorway and Jamie had instantly groaned inwardly… somehow that man had ingrained radar for quitters or maybe rather an astute sense of smell for fear. He guessed that was a skill set that made him so good at his job as a Navy SEAL instructor since it made short work of weeding out the eventual failures. "Because I can get you a little accent pillow and maybe some potpourri to match if you're just going to lay there like a goddamn throw rug."_

" _I tried," Jamie bit back in utter frustration. "I TRIED MY BEST, DAMN IT! But it just wasn't good enough! It won't move no matter how hard... I just can't do it!"_

" _YET!" Rigsby added, and the word cracked like a whip off his tongue and echoed in the empty space in the gym at this early hour. "You forgot to add the word 'yet', as in 'I tried my absolute best tonight, Commander Rigsby, but it just wasn't good enough, YET, sir!' Otherwise you sound like a damn sugar cookie. Do you want to know what that is?"_

" _Why do I have a feeling I don't have a choice in the matter, and it probably has nothing to do with Cupcake's hidden confectionary talents," came the defeated voice from the floor._

" _So get up and leave if you don't want to listen to me!" Rigsby barked back without sympathy as he stepped in the room and took a seat while offering Jamie no assistance. "When we have a new class come in… they get lined up for uniform inspection at least twice a week and we're picky bastards as you can imagine," he added with great self-satisfaction while he leaned back and recounted one of his favorite job details. "You ought to see these newbs the first couple of times… they're so gung-ho with their perfectly starched hats, immaculately pressed uniforms and spit-shined belt buckles, but you know what? We always find something wrong. No matter how much effort they put into starching their hat, or pressing their uniform or polishing their belt buckle… it just isn't good enough. You know what happens when they fail?" he questioned._

" _No, Commander Rigsby, sir... please enlighten me," came the unrepentant even reply._

" _Wiseass," Rigsby spat before continuing. "For failing their uniform inspection they have to run fully clothed into the surfzone and then, wet from head to toe, roll around on the beach until every part of their body is covered with sand. They stay in that uniform the rest of the day… cold, wet and sandy looking like a damn sugar cookie. The ones that couldn't accept the fact that all their effort was in vain… that no matter how hard they tried they didn't get it right that time… they FAILED," he emphasized. "The purpose of the drill wasn't to get them dressed up all nice, it was so they understood that sometimes no matter how well you prepare or how hard you try, you are never going to succeed on every effort and still might end up as a sugar cookie that day. It's just the way life is sometimes. The ones that accepted that and came back the next time anyway were the ones that made it through."_

" _Guess you were right, Rigs… I am definitely a sugar cookie now," Jamie gave a minimal laugh as he imagined his appearance on this hillside at the moment, covered from head to toe in dirt, leaves and now frosting over. "But I'm not giving up, YET!" he added with a sad, frustrated huff just as somewhere nearby Danny's cell phone buzzed, and the sound cut through the quiet night like a knife… the first such hopeful sign to have appeared to him in hours. Thinking he might just be hallucinating by this point and holding his breath against the pain, he forced himself to sit up just slightly and spotted the device as it lit up once more, remaining helplessly out of reach on the other side of a swath of rocks, but with one thing that stirred his resolve… Eddie's caller ID was showing. She was trying to reach him… just as it had been her voice that had brought him back that first afternoon in the hospital down in DC even if his confused brain had not recognized it at first._

" _Oh, thank God, Ed!" he cried as he slumped back down, unable to rise once more but finding the strength now to carve out one more hour. "Please, baby… I know you can find me… I'm still right here!"_

 **SEAL Rule 4: If you want to change the world get over being a sugar cookie and keep moving forward.**

* * *

"What the hell, Kenz?!" Rick blurted out after rounding one of the hall corners and finding her sitting there alone on a bench, feet spread wide, elbows resting on her knees as she leaned over and stared at the ground, "You needed time to get yourself together?! What's the matter? What went wrong?"

"Who said anything was the matter, Rick?" she asked as she wearily sat back against the wall and pushed her surgical cap back off her head before releasing the ponytail and those signature shoulder-length auburn locks of hers. "Didn't Rebecca tell you? Ten hours… it's been awhile since I did a marathon one and overnight too. I'm just tired."

"Don't give me that crap!" he demanded with a renewed frown. "The Charlotte MacKenzie I know is like a little kid on Christmas morning whenever she finishes a big surgery and knows she knocked it out of the ballpark. You're on such an adrenaline rush you don't come down for days afterwards. You should be higher than a kite if you knew your protocol was gonna save Reagan's leg. NOW SPILL! Because I gotta go in there with the family, and if there's something wrong..."

"I did save it, Rick… well at least I got as far as the first step," she admitted as her eyes flashed up at him with more emotion than he had ever remembered seeing after a tough case. "I rerouted blood vessels, I straightened out the broken bones… I left him with a hell of a gap in his femur THAT I KNOW I can fix back up at Columbia. I did what damn few other surgeons could have done or would have tried to do… I was on my game after all these months out of the OR, but... this is the first time I ever stood in front of the table and had to make a tough choice and then second guessed why I was doing it… was it the best thing for the patient or for me? Before I did everything I could for one of the boys or I did what needed to be done… I never let anything or anyone else influence me to the detriment of my own career. I was on the fence here, Rick… he's got nerve damage that may or may not be severe or permanent and I had to decide if moving ahead and trying to keep his leg was worth the risks. Before with a break like that, it would have been an easy choice. Now instead of just what's best for Jamie, I'm considering my study… what a bad outcome might mean to it… and on the other hand what my director will think if I do amputate because he's totally excited that I have a subject like this that ticks all the boxes down to the fact he needs to be evac'd out of here just like a kid picked up in the desert overseas and sent to Germany. I need his financial support and confidence to keep my clinic funded. On top of that I'm standing there thinking about Quincy, that guy whose leg I couldn't save a few years ago… back then it was just about him… that's a lot of people in the room with me that should have never been there."

"But you decided to go ahead… to keep it," Rick asked as he sat down next to her. "And now…"

"Now I've got to go tell the family exactly what they were hoping to hear without knowing a hundred percent for sure that I did the right thing by him for the right reasons. I've never done that before."

"No way. I know you, Kenz," Rick assured as he slid closer and put an arm around her shoulder. "You might have had all these things going through your head, but in the end you made the best choice you could for Jamie."

"And if he dies from complications or suffers for it because I pushed it too far, will you be so sure then?" she asked while biting her lip and glancing over as she rested her head against him for support. "Because I won't be."

###

Fifteen minutes later, it was an outwardly confident-appearing minute redheaded woman surgeon in Birkenstocks that walked into the conference room and offered a small reassuring smile as she closed the door behind her. Frank and Danny were gathered on either side of Eddie at the far end of the table while Rick had joined them a few minutes before and picked a seat across from them.

"Doctor MacKenzie," Frank greeted her as he stood up for introductions. "This is Jamie's wife, my daughter-in-law, Edit… Eddie, and my oldest son, Danny. We want to thank you for everything you did for Jamie today."

"Nice to meet you both," Kenzie replied as she returned handshake gestures with a glance over towards Rick. "I'm so sorry it's under these circumstances."

"What can you tell us about his condition?" Frank prodded, anxious to hear about his son while Eddie looked on nervously waiting for what was to be revealed.

"Jamie is critical, but stable," Kenzie added quickly. "Now don't get too hung up on that… he had quite the eventful last eighteen hours or so. He'll be under very careful observation for the next several days to make sure the bleeding in his spleen remains arrested and I'm hopeful we can remove the chest tube soon so he can be a little more comfortable there when he wakes up, although frankly with all those broken ribs he'll probably not be focusing on that too much. It is essential we try to keep his pain managed… he needs to breathe as normally as possible so we don't end up with pneumonia as a complication."

"Can you do that here?" Danny chipped in as he put a reassuring hand on Eddie's shoulder while knowing how the revelation about what had happened with Jamie's initial anesthesiologist was deeply upsetting to her and had left her wary of this doctor despite reassurances from everyone else that what had taken place was not Kenzie's fault no matter what was overheard from those two gossiping nurses. "I mean can we trust these people to take care of him considering...?"

"Well, the staff here has been put on notice and I won't hesitate to follow up on that if needed so I don't think there will be any other issues, but we are going to have to discuss a timetable for his transfer back to the city. If he remains stable, I intend to chopper him out late tomorrow afternoon. I don't want to be stuck here for the storm and I actually have another patient at Columbia that was scheduled for surgery today… it's time sensitive as we've already performed a harvest and I can't compromise his care. I can only push that back thirty-six hours."

"He's going back to St. Vic's then, right?" Eddie asked with a bit of an insistent tone, suddenly the thought of Jamie being taken back to the city, but inconveniently far away up in northern Manhattan was disconcerting. "It's near our home and Dr. Holden is there… she's been his pulmonologist before, plus my sister-in-law Linda works in the ER so we know the staff will take care of him."

"No, I'm sorry we didn't get a chance to discuss the details of this earlier; I had hoped that you would arrive before I took him in," Kenzie revealed with a look at Rick. "But I thought you were aware. Jamie's been made part of my study at Columbia. He'll need to be admitted there for the follow-up surgeries and his post-op care."

"There's more surgeries?" Eddie sighed, feeling uninformed and out of control again. "As in more than one? Why? How many?"

"I'm sorry, Eddie," Rick asserted. "Kenzie outlined the protocol to me, but I didn't want to speak out of turn and get ahead of anything until we knew how things went in the OR here."

"She also discussed that probability with me, sweetheart, although we didn't have time to get into the details. I said we understood; things were moving so quickly," Frank admitted as he reached for her hand with the sense she was about to work herself up once more. "I'm also sorry I didn't discuss that with you any further. I think we were all just holding our breath to make sure we got to that point."

"Let's step back then," Kenzie offered as she sensed the family discord brewing in a pair of flashing blue eyes and sought to head it off by pulling out a tablet and swiping to some images. "I'll warn you first, these are going to be difficult to look at, but it's better to know what to expect before you go in the back. As you know, Jamie presented with a badly broken leg, ruptured spleen and broken ribs. His head and spinal scans were clear, so I addressed the spleen first. These small coils were inserted into some of the blood vessels to reduce the pressure to the organ to allow it to hopefully self-heal as despite earlier views, the spleen is a critical component in the body's immune system and removing it has proven to cause later complications in many people… leaving them highly susceptible to infections. Regardless, if he has another significant bleed here, I will need to take it out so we must be very, very careful with him as it's healing," she emphasized. "His immune system will be compromised and very importantly it means he's not allowed a lot of movement for the next several weeks, not that he'll want to with the broken ribs on that side anyway, and absolutely nothing that will risk further injury… falling for example or any blows to the area."

"Like from a little girl sitting on his lap," Eddie asked sadly as her eyes welled up. "We have a three-year-old daughter… she loves to hug her daddy. She's already upset that he's hurt."

"Eddie, We'll talk to Kaylin. She'll understand to be gentle until he's better, honey," Frank assured.

"Of course," Kenzie admitted with a sympathetic frown. "I'm sorry, I know how hard that will be, but definitely no, so I would suggest very close supervision with her for the time being. Now for the leg," she warned as she switched images. "I won't show you the pre-op views unless you insist. They were, as you can imagine, not very pretty. This is the tibial nail and screws. We were able to correct this first and I'm satisfied both the lower leg bones will align and heal as expected. Once that was done we addressed the femur," she led and regretfully presented the last x-ray, noting the grimaces on everyone's faces as she revealed the shot with the external fixation device evident.

"Oh my God!" Eddie gasped as she felt lightheaded and her stomach churned dangerously at just the more sanitized two-dimensional black and white view. "Are those screws in his bone sticking out?!" she cried. "And that big spot… is missing?!"

"For now, yes," Kenzie admitted as even Frank and Danny sat back at the sight even though it was not the first time they had run across such a thing, although it was much more emotional when it was someone you loved in that condition. "There are at least two more surgeries that are necessary before we can put in an internal nail like down below and remove those. I am hoping he'll be able to handle another round of anesthesia by Monday afternoon. Without getting into the proprietary details of my protocol, which I cannot discuss, we'll harvest for the bone graft from the iliac crest in his right hip. Unfortunately due to the amount of material needed I'll have to use the more invasive approach, but given the fact that he's already immobile it's not really going to affect that so much as just be one more thing he'll need time to recover from and the risk of complications is slightly higher."

"You can't discuss your protocol," Eddie repeated somewhat coldly as her brain was spinning now and those implanted doubts in Kenzie's work were rising to the top. "Or you _won't._ We just have to trust you on this and let you experiment on him? How the hell am I supposed to make these kinds of decisions if I don't know what's happening?!"

"Eddie, I know I'm asking quite a lot to take this on faith, but I assure you this is Jamie's best chance for a good outcome here," Kenzie replied, although Rick noticed an uncharacteristic waiver in her voice over the mention of trust. "In a nutshell, the graft material is infused in a customized matrix prepared specifically for Jamie which will be implanted to fill that void between the two bones in a third surgery approximately three days after the harvest. At that point a rod will be inserted into the marrow of the bone and locked in with another series of internal screws and this exterior device will come off so he's able to bend his knee again and begin some rehab while the bone starts to heal."

"Then what?!" Eddie demanded with an edge, sensing there was more bad news to be delivered.

"In the end if all goes well and circulation is reestablished, it calcifies over while the matrix slowly biodegrades away so he's left with his own solid bone capable of bearing weight and remodeling itself as normal for the rest of this life."

"Normal, unless there are complications, right?! What else can go wrong?!" Eddie asked carefully as she tried to keep her voice even but her frustration and fear was obviously spilling out now as the sight of that break was tremendously worse than she had even imagined.

"Aside from the obvious bone breakage, there was significant damage to the blood vessels and nerves in the area of the fractures. I believe I was able to mitigate the vascular damage, but we won't know the extent of the neurological damage until the swelling comes down and the blocks can be removed. Until then there's no way to test…" she trailed off tightly as she bit the bullet and laid it out there. "It's possible some of that could be permanent or detrimental to his recovery."

"His nerves… is he… does he hurt?" Eddie asked as she closed her eyes, afraid to hear the answer.

"Right now on that side he has a femoral catheter in that's delivering a nerve block up in his groin area so he has no feeling below that," Kenzie explained. "We'll keep that drip going through Monday and then switch to a higher one to also cover his hip for a few days. Other than that, he'll have definite pain from the bruising and injuries to his left rib cage. We'll set him up with a patient-controlled device that will allow him to deliver medication periodically as he needs to be comfortable."

"But Jamie hates those," Eddie sighed. "He refuses to use it most of the time because it makes him so fuzzy."

"Well, I have a feeling that it will become his new best friend for at least a little while," Kenzie tried to hearten. "It's imperative that he use it to be able to breathe as normally as possible. Our biggest risks here are infection of course given the open nature of that fracture and pulmonary complications… pneumonia and fat embolisms are at the top of the list. The incidence of those problems can approach ninety percent in patients who have sustained major long bone injuries like this. If it progresses to the rare clinical entity known as fat embolism syndrome (FES), a systemic inflammatory cascade affecting multiple organ systems, morbidity and mortality are high. He'll need to be watched carefully for the signs including respiratory difficulties, a rash usually on the neck or chest and or cerebral issues," she reiterated. "Early signs present twelve to seventy-two hours after injury."

"So that's why the other doctor wanted to amputate, right?" Eddie continued to demand answers while everyone else in the room took a backseat since it was obvious she was fully into her role as Jamie's advocate now and neither Frank nor Danny felt it appropriate to jump in front of that train at the moment until she got it out. "Because of those risks… that's what he was considering? And what you did made that worse? I need him!" she exclaimed. "Kaylin and I need _him_ more than anything else… more than some stupid top-secret medical study you can't even talk about!"

"Eddie, I'm sure Dr. MacKenzie weighed all of those things very carefully when she decided to proceed," Frank assured although if he didn't know better he thought he caught a pained glance between the surgeon and Rick which put just a hint of fear back in his heart before he carried on to try to calm his upset daughter-in-law. "I am confident her approach was in his best interest both now and for the future. That other doctor… he did not have my son's welfare at heart and was only concerned with covering his bases while taking the easy way out. That's not the Reagan way," he asserted. "It's not what Jamie would have chosen for himself. He'll beat this and come out whole on the other side… you'll see when you can talk to him, sweetheart. I promise you. Don't take this decision on yourself so hard," he reminded as he tried to steady her.

"I think maybe we need to just go back and see him now," Danny offered finally as he sat back and listened with glassy eyes, and to be honest at this point he really didn't want to hear anymore since it had just hit him that his brother's life and career had probably been flipped upside down and for much longer than the few months Linda had warned him about. "What's done is done, Eddie. I would have made the same call, and it was my fault it took so long to get you down here… if I hadn't shut off the car we could have been here before. If it's on you… it's on all of us. When do you think he'll wake up?" he asked as the anger that was brewing back up to the surface was being redirected back at that anonymous driver that had caused all of this in the first place and he was more determined than ever that was not going to go unpunished. To do that he needed whatever Jamie could give him, and as soon as possible at that. "He uh… always has issues coming back."

"Well, Rick mentioned that," Kenzie admitted. "So I tried to have him kept as light as possible since the nerve block was doing most of the work. It shouldn't be too long now, but don't expect much at first. He's likely to be fuzzy and somewhat confused for a few hours considering what he's been though."

"Doc, you have no idea what we're in for," Danny sighed as he spoke from experience and got to his feet while carefully helped his sister-in-law up.

"I'll caution you again. No matter how prepared you think you are, the sight of that external hardware will be unsettling," she reminded with a pointed nod towards Eddie. "Please remember it was necessary to keep his leg to length and stabilize the bones to reduce the trauma and pain he was in. Let's get you all settled down there so you're with him when he comes out."

In deference to the doctor's warning, both Danny and Frank had a firm grip on either side of Eddie as they rounded the corner into Jamie's glass-fronted recovery room and took in the sight before them. But for the medieval-looking device on that leg which had been elevated but considerately well-concealed under a light cover and cold packs, he looked remarkably well with decent color in his face which appeared relaxed and only a nasal cannula remaining as the tube had been removed from his throat as soon as possible to not exacerbate his lung injury. They each knew that initial looks could be deceiving though and upon closer glance it was easy to see the signs of the accident… scrapes and cuts along his whole left side although the significant bruising over his ribs was likewise hidden. Eddie bit her lip and promised herself she would not break down in here… not in front of her husband no matter what happened. She nervously reached out to touch his cheek… it was warm and stubbly but he did not stir at her arrival.

"Hey," she offered softly with a follow up kiss. "I'm here, Jamie. Okay? I'm so sorry this happened and I wasn't with you, baby… but I am now and you're gonna be alright."

"I'll leave you all alone for a bit," Kenzie advised after a careful check found everything to her standards. "I'm afraid I need to grab a little catnap myself like sleeping beauty here," she admitted. "I'll be right down the hall in the call room though if he needs anything… don't hesitate," she added.

"Thank you," Frank offered again with relief, although he dreaded the look of what was hidden under that blanket. "You went over and beyond for him, and that will never be forgotten."

Rick likewise offered Jamie a few words and excused himself with a nod to the family. "I'm gonna run back to the hotel and out to that meeting. I'll walk you down, Kenz," he called to her before leaving and Eddie couldn't help but notice the bump of encouragement and small hug he gave her on the way out before turning her focus back to her husband.

"So I guess we wait now," she admitted with an uneasy sigh as she pulled a chair over to the bed and took Jamie's hand.

* * *

 _Yup, sorry… got long again, and you didn't want me to shortchange that first interplay between our main set of lovebirds, did you? Next, Jamie will finally join the conversation, but what he has to say might leave Eddie feeling a bit heartbroken and his older brother even more frustrated with the situation regarding the investigation while everyone will be concerned about what complications are already apparent before a certain orderly steps into the picture to make things difficult once more._


	27. Chapter 27

Chapter 27

 _Well, since I received so many nice requests for a bonus chapter this week, here you go. Happy BB Friday!_

* * *

For Jamie, the time gap between his father's voice fading away the last time he was near and a sudden lightening of the surrounding darkness was almost nonexistent. It was a now familiar slow journey out from under a drugged unconsciousness and he was not surprised to hear that deep tone emanating from somewhere near followed by a tighter pitched hum that reminded him somewhat of an angry beehive. Danny…. and from the sound of it his brother wasn't too happy. Damn, that had to mean he had done something stupid again. _What was it this time?_ he wondered as just the smallest twinges of painful awareness started pouring in from his left side. Double damn… something really stupid he reasoned given that growing uncomfortable sensation which appeared to heighten with every single consecutive effort to inhale. Joe would know what was going on and could tell them… he had been there in his beloved blue Chevelle, Jamie was sure… the one he had taken a second job for that summer to restore from the ground up. No reason to hurry back if that was the case, playing possum and letting him handle it was probably a better course of action for as long as he could pull it off. Just like that time before at school… Joe had smoothed all that over for him back at home after putting the fear of God into Spencer to make sure it never happened again. There was something else here though… something softer that coincided with light touches on his chest and hand, rubbing small, comforting circles… something like Mom would do, but not Mom he puzzled as he remained motionless and silent until small patches of voluntary muscles slowly returned to his control.

A tight swallow and grimace revealed an exquisitely raw and dry throat and those caresses accelerated into a sudden overwhelming flurry that drained his senses and pushed him back down towards the darkness for a few more moments before the inevitable involuntary bodiless rise to the surface commenced again. This time he could almost reach up to break through that thin veil between here and there were it not for the fact that his eyelids remained stubbornly closed. The small twitch of his hand as he tried though was enough to alert the others around him to his returning presence.

"He moved his hand! Jamie! Jamie! Please, oh wake up now. It's okay, baby… you're gonna be alright. I'm right here," came that oddly familiar voice once more, the one that sounded sweet and sharp all at the same time… one that smelled like French vanilla, yet ironically had a passion for Avery's Down East New England-style Chocolate Double Fudge Brownie Blizzard ice cream and whose constant midnight chit-chatter was enough to keep the dead awake. Such interesting details he thought although try as he might Jamie could just not wrap his brain around who in his life that might belong to. Definitely not Syd… she had never liked anything but butter pecan, anyway. Probably not Dana either as he was pretty sure she preferred strawberry. Still this exhausting fog refused to clear, and he lost the resolve to try to fight it anymore, content to lay quietly and take increasingly shallow breaths in an effort to stave off more discomfort as some new light pressure on his chest made it grow even tighter before that set off some kind of infernal beeping noise and startled him back into drawing in more air as a wave of emotional panic exuded from whoever that was next to him and had his father stepping in to try to quell it…

"Jamie! Oh my God, he's not breathing! Frank!"

"Sweetheart, now yes he is," came the deep assurance from that familiar baritone. "Please try to relax and look at the monitor… it's back where it should be. He's just having a little trouble waking up. Maybe we should move that pillow away off his chest… his ribs…"

"No! I'm being careful and I don't want him to see… that!… Not when he first wakes up! I have to explain…"

That… whatever _that_ was couldn't be too good he reasoned if it required an attempt at manual suffocation with full disclosure before some kind of grand unveiling and it had Jamie trying to take inventory of what exactly was wrong with him anyway before abandoning that plan since frankly everything he could feel now hurt like hell and there was no way to distinguish what _that_ might be if it was worse. The only thing that didn't really bother him was his legs, so _that_ was good, right… unless _that_ meant...

"C'mon, kid… I saw _that!_ You wiggled your foot down here. Now stop playing games with us and open your damn eyes already!" a low growl followed from what he imagined was the base of a hospital bed. Danny, God love him… ever the patient one… still maybe it was time to try just a little harder...

"Hey," a surprisingly beautiful blond countenance with openly weepy blue eyes greeted him with a soft kiss on the lips while gripping his right hand in a vice lock when he finally managed to break the seal on his own and the images surrounding him flooded in slowly as they adjusted. "Oh Jamie, I'm so glad you're back. I love you so much, baby… I'm so sorry I didn't listen to you. This is all my fault!"

Whoa. Now _that_ was certainly a little unexpected, and he was at a bit of a loss on how to respond.

"Hi," seemed like the safest bet followed by another small swallow of that raw throat while his brow furrowed slightly. "M'm thirsty," he managed to rasp out simply as he sought to buy time… this woman, their relationship was more than familiar… it was intimate, he could sense that… and yet her name was stalled on the tip of his tongue and failing to come back to him. Somehow even in the state he was in Jamie knew that seemed wrong given the amount of emotion that was being reflected back at him.

"We'll check with the nurse and see if you can sip some water or have a little ice soon, okay?" the pretty blue eyes promised as her hands softly floated over the side of his face. "They told us you needed to be awake for a bit before that was allowed. You might get sick if you have it too early."

"'Kay," he agreed amicably while retaining that puzzled tone before fading back for a few moments. So like Mom, but not Mom was definitely a correct assessment, and he opened his eyes once more to stare back at her until they shifted left beyond the mound of a thick white pillow blocking part of his view until they focused on the dark woolly caterpillar-like form of an unmistakable thick mustache that announced his father's presence.

"Good finally to have you back with us, son," Frank sighed before smiling back, relieve evident in his soulful eyes that had aged several years over the past twenty-some hours or so.

"Dad," Jamie was thankful to be able to recognize and address someone by name. Maybe he could get some answers this way. "What hapn'd?"

"What do you remember?" Danny jumped into the conversation in instant interrogation mode right off the bat, eager to glean whatever unspoiled information he could from his brother.

"I um… wait what?" Jamie blinked back in confusion while trying to look between them and losing his place before repeating his initial question once more. " _What_ hapn'd?"

"You had an accident yesterday evening," Frank explained gently as he tried to fill in some of the blanks that were clearly drawn between them while giving his oldest a little frown for impatiently pushing for answers too soon. "You were hit by a car while crossing the street when you were walking back to the hotel with Rick. You're in the hospital and had a couple of surgeries so far but you're doing okay. You injured your spleen, broke some ribs and your leg," he tried to simplify for now.

"I broke my… what? The car… hit me?" he fuzzed and squinted back. Some of that would certainly explain why he felt like he's been run over by a truck… literally... but this still wasn't making any sense now. "Rick?"

"He's fine, don't worry," Frank answered while misjudging his son's mental status without understanding the point of the question. "He left a little while ago to go make your presentation, but he'll be back later this evening to see you. I sent Garrett along to help him and for moral support."

 _Well that explains everything,_ Jamie thought… except who the hell this Rick was, or the blond in front of him for that matter who kept readjusting that damn pillow to block his view even as he tried weakly numerous times to push it away.

"I don't want... that… wait, the car?" he repeated and started to get a bit agitated. Every movement and breath was causing increasing waves of pain to radiate across his chest and he was suddenly feeling trapped and claustrophobic… starved for air even as his unencumbered right hand reached up towards his face and started to pull the irritating plastic of the nasal cannula away. "He didn't…"

"Jamie… no, lambchop, don't do that," Eddie chided as she moved his hand away and fixed the tubing back in place. "You need this for now. I'm so sorry, sweetie, but do you remember why… do you remember what made you not see the car coming? Was it because of me? Because I wouldn't stop teasing you on the phone about the baby?" she asked with a quiver in her voice as the guilt that had been absolutely gnawing at her and finally spilled out now that she had a chance to speak to him.

Lambchop? The baby? What the hell?

"I saw…" he started as he stared at her blankly and tried to process that while Danny's ears perked once more. Now they were getting somewhere. "I saw... Joe's blue car… he would… wouldn't do that," he insisted while his vision blurred again and suddenly there were six faces staring back at him incredulously. "He came… to take me home."

"You saw the Chevelle?... As in our brother Joe's car?... The one you totaled years ago… at _this_ accident," Danny pieced together and spat back evenly just for some sort of clarification. "And our dead brother came to take you home. Seriously? That's what you're trying to give me? What am I supposed to do with that?! Issue an arrest warrant for him?!"

"Daniel…" Frank began to warn as he had the clear sense they were overwhelming his youngest now.

"I… remember 'im," Jamie insisted even as he put his head back and closed his eyes, dangerously close to losing it as a serious sensation of nausea swept over him. "He was... there… can't breathe… hurts… m'm feel sick," he admitted as his father noted the rising heart rate and shallow breaths with beads of sweat breaking out on his forehead. What was it Kenzie had called it before? Rapid heart rate, chest tightness, shortness of breath, hyperventilation, sweating, and trembling… his son was displaying all those same symptoms again.

"Jamie, what's happening? What's wrong?" Eddie cried. "Frank? Is he having those complications she warned us about? Is that what this is? What did she say? Rash, respiratory and brain issues… is there a rash?" she panicked since the other two seemed obvious and started to pull open the front of his hospital gown to uncover his chest. "Where? We need to check!"

"No, we need to _stop…_ it's too much for him. Danny, go get Dr. Kenzie," her father-in-law warned. "I think he's having another anxiety attack."

"Anxiety?" Danny questioned harshly. "I think he's flipped off his effing rocker if he thinks he saw Joe run him over," he insisted, still stuck on the investigation and his desire to find the perp responsible now that his brother had finally woken up, although that was up for debate currently.

"DANIEL!" Frank thundered a bit even as his oldest was already scurrying out the door and down the hall to do his bidding. "Jamie… son, you just need to relax. Listen to me… you had a long surgery to fix your leg and you're just coming out of the drugs they gave you. That's all this is, I promise. We don't need to talk about any of this now, okay? There's time for that later when you're feeling up to it. Just try to focus on taking one easy breath at a time."

"Commissioner, Mrs. Reagan," Kenzie acknowledged while pulling her stethoscope into place as she hurried back into the room followed by a nurse after being roused from her much-needed sleep. "Has this boy always been such a challenge?" she questioned Frank while doing her assessment as Eddie reluctantly gave way to offer the doctor room to work, backing off to pace the length of the bed behind her. "I bet you gave your momma fits growing up," she added even as she was drawing a small amount of anti-anxiety meds to inject into his IV. "I think you're right, sir… someone's got a bit of the heebie-jeebies going on again here."

"Don't make fun of him, this isn't funny!" Eddie's Serbian temper flared suddenly. "He's hurting, and he's scared! You shouldn't be joking around like that! He's having those complications you warned us about, isn't he?! He's my husband, not somebody that doesn't matter!"

 _Husband, well that explained it… sort of,_ Jamie considered even as he began to involuntary sink back down on the bed and his breathing settled as the drug took its desired effect. Too bad he couldn't put a name to the face since he'd obviously put a ring on the finger.

"I don't see any significant signs of FES," Kenzie assured. "There's no rash and the cognitive and respiratory issues can be explained by anxiety and residual from the anesthesia. He's not fully emergent yet."

"Well he thinks his dead brother is the one who put him here," Danny inserted. "That's not something he usually pulls out of his hat when he's juiced up. I thought you said he didn't have a head injury?"

"His initial CT was clear," Kenzie insisted. "Let's step back and reevaluate him a little. Jamie… can you tell me your full name, bud? What year is it?"

"Um… Jamison Henry Reagan," came the reply from beyond the soft, warm buzz that had settled down around him. "Twenty… sixteen."

"Good. And this big guy here with the 'stache, who is he?" she continued.

"Dad."

"Name," she prodded.

"Francis Xavier, but he hates that," came the answer with some added interesting trivia thrown in. "The other one... Daniel Fitzgerald… he hates that too; always says it sounds like a stupid dead president."

"Well, certainly good to know. You're feeling a little better now, Jamie, aren't you?" Kenzie asked as she noted the stabilizing vitals and definite relaxing demeanor.

"Yeah, s'good now."

"Excellent," the doctor advised before trying one last question which would set off an instant cascade of tears and hysterics from the blue eyes behind her. "What about your wife? Let's include her too. What's her name? I bet she likes it."

"I… I can't 'member hers."

###

"Mrs. Reagan, I understand how terribly upsetting that was, but it does not mean it's permanent, or that Jamie has any significant head injuries or impairments," Kenzie tried to assure as the family meeting had been immediately moved out into the hall after that startling admission and Frank was trying in vain to keep ahold of his visibly agitated daughter-in-law. "Roughly a third of the patients undergoing general anesthesia and surgery experience some kind of cognitive impairment such as memory loss afterwards. Anesthetics activate those receptors in the brain, ensuring that patients don't remember traumatic events during surgery. Studies have shown the activity of these receptors remains high long after the drugs have left the patient's system, sometimes for days on end. Usually though this clears up in a few hours; we just need to give him a little more time to wake up."

"And for the last time, I don't care about those stupid studies!" Eddie railed. "He remembered everyone else except _me,_ and he didn't even ask about his daughter or the baby!" she cried with a hand on her tummy. "That's not him… that's not my Jamie, and then he's talking about seeing his brother that died years ago! How can you say nothing's really wrong? I didn't even get a chance to tell him about his leg... and how's he supposed to cope with that?!" she demanded. "Something's happening to him! You said if he had those complications we had to catch it early or he could die from them!"

"All right," Kenzie conceded as she stepped back. "Let's be sure. I don't want you worrying about that. I'll give him a little more sedative to keep him quiet and comfortable then send him down for another head CT. As long as that's clear and there's no rash or further respiratory issues, we'll agree then that this is most likely a side effect from the anesthesia and give him some time to recover from it before jumping on anything else. Acceptable?"

"Thank you, Doctor," Frank agreed for the three of them since he was apparently the only one on Kenzie's side in this currently, having spoken to Jamie at the scene where he clearly remembered his wife and held concern for her, and a witness the previous anxiety attack. "I'm sure you're right about all of this, but I think that will set everyone's mind at ease," he added.

"Not a problem," Kenzie assured. "Let me just get those orders in, and I'll have a nurse and an orderly take him down for the scan in a few minutes."

Indeed, it was just twenty minutes later when Jamie was all packaged up to move once more and found himself being rolled down the hall towards the elevator by a cleverly disguised orderly and a busy charge nurse. "Excuse me, ma'am," Malevsky said as he put a hand out to stop a distracted Eddie from entering the car with them while she flinched at his touch for an unknown reason and subconsciously felt that sixth-sense warning Jamie had always displayed on the job. "I'm afraid they only allow authorized personnel down there," he drawled in a practiced southern accent. "We'll have him back safe and sound when he's finished," he added.

"Oh… okay, I guess," Eddie regretfully conceded and offered a now-sleeping Jamie a kiss goodbye on his cheek although every fiber of her being was telling her not to leave his side at that moment. She had been the one to insist that he be taken for this test though after all, so had to let go. "I love you and I'll be right here when you get back," she assured.

"Yes, ma'am," Malevsky smirked after he reached over and hit the down button and the doors closed. "Seems a little jumpy, that one," he observed to the nurse as they descended while their patient lay utterly quiet with those all-important IV lines in easy reach as Mason fingered that retrieved syringe in his pocket. One little poke and it would be goodnight Jamison Reagan forever then he would be long gone before an autopsy revealed what had truly happened to the unfortunate little bastard.

"Privileged family… assumes everyone else has to bow down for them," replied the nurse before she looked at him. "And that doctor thinks she's the Queen of England. You new here?"

"Just got transferred down from the fifth floor," he lied cleanly.

"Well, I need to drop off this chart on two," she replied as she hit the second button and glanced at the monitor. "He's fine. I'll meet you down there in a few minutes, okay? The rest of us have jobs to do beyond babysitting some civilian bigwig's kid for an unnecessary test."

"I hear, ya," Malevsky smiled agreeably as they came to a stop on the second floor and she exited. "And I'll be sure both Jamison and Commissioner Frank Reagan get what they've got coming," he added as he reached for that thin plastic tubing as soon as the elevator doors closed and he was alone with Jamie once more.

* * *

 _Okay, so that was a bit cruel to everyone involved, I know. Bahaha! Next, we'll find out just what was up Mason Malevsky's sleeve, or rather in his pocket, and what consequences that might bring as Eddie discovers that her husband's care and wellbeing are out of her control once more, and who will she blame as things go wrong?_


	28. Chapter 28

Chapter 28

"Eddie, the head CT came back all clear," Frank reminded her as they were once again gathered around a sleeping Jamie in his room a few hours after he had been brought back up in the now-fading light of late afternoon. "Why don't I have Danny or Baker escort you back to the hotel so you can freshen up?" he asked. "I'll stay with him for a bit while he wakes up again… I think having three of us in here last time was just too overwhelming. Once the drugs have a chance to wear off, I'm sure he'll be much clearer, and you can come back. Use his room… his things are still in there. We have to pack them up anyway to bring home with us tomorrow."

"I know what you're saying, Frank… you just don't want me here to freak him out again, right?" Eddie sighed as she laid her head back down on the bed next to her husband's shoulder.

"I think what he means is he wants us both out of here," Danny admitted. "Maybe that's not such a bad idea. I could run down to the precinct and see if I can light a fire under this Fowler guy again since we'll be home tomorrow. What time does the plane take off? I promised Linda I'd be back. Her um... well, she has someplace to be in the afternoon."

"Say it, Danny… her neurologist appointment," Eddie mumbled with her chin resting tiredly on the bed as she patted her stomach with her other hand and considered what had transpired in the last 48 hours, all thoughts of a perfect life with a perfect husband and a healthy second child pushed away. "It's no good to keep things from family."

"I want everyone to come through this healthy, and that includes you and this new grandbaby I'll be anxiously waiting for in the spring. Wheels up at eleven," Frank answered as he sought to elevate the dismal mood in the room. "We should be back in the city by two and Eddie, I'll have you driven up to Manhattan and we'll get a hotel room there near the medical campus so you can stay through the storm over the weekend. But first you should stop in Bay Ridge. Kaylin is waiting... I'm sure she'll be anxious to see you."

"She'll want to see her Daddy, and who knows when that will be allowed," Eddie sniffed as she stroked Jamie's messy hair. "God, I don't even know where to start to explain this to her and I hate that he'll be here alone all afternoon until the helicopter comes," she added softly, but a request to accompany him had been flatly denied. Only medical personnel allowed on the MedEvac flight Dr. Kenzie's director was sending down directly from Columbia. "I wish they would let me fly up with him."

"It's better that you're waiting for him when he gets there. Dr. Kenzie said she's hired that scrub nurse that assisted her in the surgery to go with her… she was so impressed she's considering offering her a position on her clinical team. Baker will stay here and look out for him," Frank reminded. "She and Garrett will drive up in his car after Jamie leaves and pick up yours on the way back. You said the garage called and told you they found the problem."

"Some sort of weird alien drain on the battery," Eddie confirmed.

"Parasitic, not alien," Danny corrected. "Something to do with the circuit the phone charger was on, that's why mine was fried. The guy said he'd never seen anything like it when he tried to explain it to me."

"Whatever, I hate that car."

"Yes, well it sure has been an odd set of circumstances the past few days," Frank agreed, thinking that maybe he should have used the word coincidences, but he never believed in those anyway, still...

"Hey, what about Jamie's phone?" Danny wondered as the thought occurred to him. "It's not in his personal effects bag over there… not like there's much that is," he added since the majority of his brother's clothing had been cut away by the medics or destroyed by blood. "Please, God, tell me it flew out of his hand, through the window and into the backseat of that car so all we have to do is ping it," he bargained. "I swear I'll say a thousand Hail Mary's on my knees and go to early mass every Sunday morning for a whole year if that's the case."

"I don't remember seeing it on scene," Frank recalled his follow-up conversations with Detective Nucifero which had proven just as unfruitful. "I wasn't really looking. Maybe it got picked up in an evidence bag," he frowned. "Not that much was… just some bits of that broken glass by all accounts. Check with Jimmy and see what he knows."

"Yeah," Danny agreed intending to get his hands on whatever there was if this Detective Fowler was just going to throw it in the crapper anyway along with the case file. "I'm gonna get on that," he added as he got up and went over to the bed to give his sister-in-law a little support. "Hang in there Eddie… Dad's right. You should get some rest. The kid always acts weird every time he winds up in a place like this. He'll probably wake up soon and not have a clue what he said before. I shouldn't have pushed him so hard… most of that was probably my fault."

"Thanks, Danny," Eddie acknowledged his parting hug for both her and his brother. "Let me know if you find out anything from the detective… I've got too much else to worry about to get involved, but I do want this guy caught for what he did."

"Not gonna count on that, but I'll see what I can do," he offered before putting a hand on his father's shoulder for a small squeeze of comfort on the way out. "I'll be back later."

 _One down, one to go,_ Frank thought as he sat back and let out a deep breath. "Now for you, young lady…"

"Frank, you've gotten even less sleep than I have," Eddie reminded as she sank back down in her chair exhausted. "You have a whole city to run and storm prep to do when you get home. My world is here right now," she added sadly. "Well except for an unhappy little girl who's probably giving Pop a run for his money."

"Yes, but I am not presently trying to grow a whole new human being inside of me either," her father-in-law explained with concern. "The city will run itself while I take a nap if needed. That's why I have good people working for me. This level of stress is not good for you or the baby, Eddie… and you know it. Let's not make this situation any worse."

"I'll just stay for a little while longer until he wakes up… please," she pleaded. "Even if he's still confused, I promise I won't get all worked up in front of him again. I don't want him to be upset and I have to tell him what's happened to his leg… I mean he'll see what she did," Eddie teared up as she glanced at that dreaded obvious metal contraption encircling it, having become physically ill twice after gathering to courage to see what exactly was under that blanket when the nurse had come into reposition the cold packs around it. "Dr. Kenzie said once he comes out of it she'll set up one of those pumps so he can control the pain himself for his ribs. When he starts using that, I'll know he'll be just sleeping for the most part, and I'll be okay with leaving for a little while."

"Acquired," Frank replied flatly before explaining when Eddie looked up in confusion. "The Reagan pig-headed gene," he added. "We always wondered, well now I know for sure… it's acquired, not inherited," he finished with a frown as he looked at his equally stubborn daughter-in-law who cracked a small smile for the first time all day.

###

"Ed… Eddie! Get Kaylin out of the house! There's a fire!" Jamie's panicking voice startled both his wife and father out of their uncomfortable naps and to the bedside just forty-five minutes later.

"Jamie! Calm down, you're just having a bad dream!" she begged as she grabbed his right hand and tried to stop him from patting the bed frantically down towards his hip as far as he could reach. "Kaylin's not here, she's at home with Pop and Erin!"

"NO, GET HER OUT! It's too hot in here! It's burning! I can't move!" he insisted before his pain-riddled eyes finally opened and locked on hers. "ED, HELP ME!"

"Jamie… you remember," she noted the recognition in his expression before pushing that fact aside to focus on what was happening to him. "Tell me what's the matter… I want to help you!"

"My leg! It hurts! GOD, I CAN'T STAND IT!" he cried loudly while gripping her hand so hard it turned white.

"Okay, shhh shhh… that shouldn't be happening, right?!" Eddie hissed as she looked at Frank who was staring back with an equally shocked expression at this latest development. "Dr. MacKenzie said he wouldn't feel anything down there until they took the catheter out when he was back in New York! Speak of the devil," she nearly spat as Kenzie ran into the room after being alerted from down the hall once more. "What's wrong this time?" Eddie demanded. "Tell me he's just having another anxiety attack!"

"No, no… definitely not," Kenzie admitted as she checked her first assumption, that the IV bag supplying the anesthetic agent to the femoral nerve had been allowed to run dry. When that wasn't the case she began to search through the connecting tubing looking for a kink, or… the fact that it was completely disconnected from the catheter with the medicine dripping down ineffectually onto the sheets below. "Oh, damn it!" she exclaimed. "Someone must have pulled it when he was being transferred… his block's worn off. We need an ultrasound in here to double-check the catheter is still in the right place and hasn't been dislodged," she ordered. "Let's get Skip back in here ASAP to do a regular needle block in the meantime. Hang in there, Jamie… we're gonna get you fixed up in just a few minutes," she assured. "I don't think it's a good idea to hit you with a higher dose of morphine again. I want to know why this wasn't checked when he was brought back to the room!" she snapped at the charge nurse who had accompanied Jamie down to the CT.

"I… I thought it was okay," she stuttered. "We don't use those with Dr. McKitrick! Everything else was cleared!"

"Who _are_ you?… Why does it hurt so bad?" Jamie practically whimpered as he looked at Kenzie just as Rick rounded the corner, having returned from the presentation.

"What's going on?" he questioned. "Kenz?"

"One at a time, and right now my focus is on Jamie," she declared as the anesthesiologist entered the room. "All right, Skip's here, so everyone else out. Mrs. Reagan, you can stay if you're able to help keep him still for a few minutes."

"Okay, but..." Eddie looked down Jamie's side nervously as she continued to grip his hand while a rather delicate area was being quickly and efficiently cleansed and draped after the blanket was pulled back off his leg, exposing the hardware to his unbelieving eyes for the first time.

"WHAT THE HELL IS _THAT?!"_ he panted as he looked back to his wife, shock at the sight of the long pins sticking out of his leg attached to external rods and ring fixators threatening to unglue him completely. "EDDIE!"

" _That?"_ Kenzie took over as she sought to keep control over the situation and distract everyone while they quickly did what needed to be done. "Isn't _that_ so cool? Can you believe I get paid good money… or Thai food in this case... to do _that_ to people for a living? _That's_ what we do to fix a broken femur so that your leg doesn't shrink down to be shorter than the other one... otherwise it's tough to walk a straight line if you ever get pulled over… but hey, you're a cop and the son of the New York City Police Commissioner for crying out loud so that probably doesn't matter in the larger scheme of things. Don't worry though, it's temporary and makes for a great war story later whenever you want to gross someone out. Be sure to take some nice pics of it to remember the good times. Hold still now, big stick," she warned although he didn't even flinch as it was nothing in comparison to the level of raw pain from shattered bones with massive screws drilled through them.

"Got it," Skip declared a few minutes later as he stood up. "Let's give that time to kick in before we check the catheter."

"Jamie, humor me for a second before everything goes blissfully numb again because that's going to happen real soon and I know you'll be in a lot happier place to talk then," Kenzie asked. "Tell me where it hurts the worst… above or below the knee?"

"Up.. um… top I think," he answered as his brow furrowed up and his face pinched while trying to breathe through the stabbing, throbbing pain as Eddie was doing everything in her power to soothe him. "Nothing hurts... below... that's good?" he questioned.

"Good information to have for sure," Kenzie frowned almost imperceptibly at that revelation and Eddie clearly caught that look but decided against confronting the doctor in front of her husband again who just started to release the death grip on her hand after a few more moments.

"It's starting... to get better," he revealed as his head was relaxing back down on the pillow and his eyes closed. "Damn…"

"You've got that right," Kenzie agreed. "Remember me now?" she asked after pulling her ponytail out and letting her shoulder length hair down to test his mental status once more.

" _The_ Kenzie," he replied correctly this time after a quick peek.

"Ding ding, the boy's back among us," she smiled although her unusual loose bedside manner had Eddie gritting her teeth once more.

"M'm sorry, Ed," Jamie apologized as he glanced over and caught her tight look. "Did I hurt you?"

"No, of course not, sweetie," she assured even though her hand was honestly throbbing more than a little as she was shaking it out. "I'll just remind you about this in a few months when we're in the delivery room."

"The baby," he sighed as his mind was still playing catch up. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine and so is the munchie," Eddie smiled at that, relieved to have her husband back and mostly cognizant after all of this. "I'm not the one in here," she added as she leaned in and rested her forehead against his. "I'm so sorry, Jamie. This was all my fault…" she trailed off as she cried some tears of relief and laid some kisses on his face. "God, I was so scared," she admitted. "We'll get you through this though… all of us."

"Alright, I'm going to let your family have a bit of a visit since they've been waiting around all day to talk to you, and then I'll be back myself for a little chat," Kenzie informed as she was efficiently cleaning up the remnants of the supplies that had been used and covering everything back up before pulling open the curtain that had been drawn around for privacy. "I can't allow something like this to happen to you again. I'm going to give you something to make the ribs more comfortable and then when I come back we'll set you up with a happy button all of your very own so you can control your pain level, okay? Back in ten," she promised.

"Again? What is she talking about?" Jamie asked as he wearily laid his head back. Now that the white hot pain from his leg had subsided the rest of his injuries were making their presence, and discomfort known to his brain again. "What happened… Dad?" he tried again as Frank entered the room a few minutes later, relieved to see his son more focused in spite of the events that had just occurred.

"You were hit by a car near the hotel while crossing the street last night," his father informed once more. "Do you remember talking about this before?"

"Not really," Jamie confessed. "Everything's a blur, or a dream… maybe a nightmare. I don't know which," he admitted in confusion.

"Understandable," Frank assured, careful not to try to interrogate him over the accident itself and possibly send him backwards into a discussion over Joe. "You injured your spleen, broke upwards of five ribs and your leg…" he trailed off. "Several places there too, but you had surgery and Dr. Kenzie is working to fix you up and get you back home to the city to recover."

"Why her?" Jamie puzzled. "She's not… Rick said she's in New York now I think? We're…"

"Still in DC. You... um… well, you needed her expertise, and she volunteered to help. We'll explain all that later after you've had a chance to rest," Frank promised.

"I'm so glad you're back," Eddie repeated in a choking whisper as she was letting some of the tension from the last twenty-four hours go and her sobbing tears were soaking his shoulder. "Thank God!"

"Ed… sweetie, don't cry like that. Why are you so upset?" Jamie wondered. "Dad?" he asked with worry as he lifted his eyes up and sought answers again. "Is it that bad?"

"You were a bit fuzzy from the drugs the last time you woke up," his father explained and once again glossed over the facts as he tried to downplay things even as Eddie started to cry harder in relief at the mention of the time her husband had literally forgotten her. "That's all. It upset her to see you like that, and it's going to take some time for you to recover from this," he admitted.

"M'm sorry," he whispered as he put his right hand up on her back and kissed the side of her head, breathing in some of that faded French vanilla scent. "I screwed up. It'll be okay… I always do stupid stuff like this, right?"

"That you do, bud," Rick agreed as he walked back in the room to join them. "You're like the best job security a guy like me could ask for. Good to see you're back," he admitted. "I gotta tell you though, Chairman Atwater was so disappointed that you weren't there I thought he might cry and kick me out of the room."

"The presentation," Jamie sighed as he closed his eyes. "How…?"

"Oh, I handled it just fine, thank you. Me and a bunch of suits alone together. Even brought one of my own… that Garrett guy, he's okay. Knew how to talk their language and smooth things over when I messed up, just like you usually do. It was alright," Rick insisted. "They were impressed with the ideas more so than the guy giving the speech on two hours of sleep. Don't worry about it. Everyone understood and wished you well."

"'Kay," Jamie replied with a definite drift in his voice. "Gettin' tired again," he admitted as he relaxed back just as Kenzie walked back in the room.

"Oops, nuh uh!" she tutted and startled him back awake. "Give me two minutes to explain what's going to happen and then you can go back to la la land, okay? First, let me say I have never in my life as a surgeon experienced the ineptitude that's been on display at this place. I can't for the life of me understand, but that's for me to contend with and I promise you heads will roll… that being said, Jamie cannot afford another incident like that," she informed knowingly even as his eyes remained closed and she knew he had fallen into a drug-induced asleep once more. "We're trying to get a spleen, which is like a big blood-filled sponge, to heal and he's having all these pressure spikes from pain events which is unbelievingly not good, so I made a few calls and was able to get the chopper from Columbia to come down early. I spoke to the Commissioner about this already out in the hall. Rick will assist me since the nurse I had lined up isn't available. We're bugging out of here at twenty-one-hundred hours and tucking Jamie in safe and sound on my unit tonight where I trust my staff."

"Tonight!" Eddie gasped. "But our plane doesn't leave until tomorrow at eleven! He'll be all alone!" she exclaimed as she looked at her once-again sleeping husband even though she was the one who was upset at the thought. "I have to go with him!"

"No, Eddie," Frank advised. "You need some rest… we all do. You will sleep at the hotel tonight. This is in Jamie's best interest and yours too. Rick promised to stay with him overnight up there and then Erin will go check first thing in the morning and be there until you come. It's best for everyone," he added firmly in his deepest this-is-how-it's-going-to-go-down-no-questions-asked fatherly voice even as he said a small prayer that he was doing the right thing knowing that Eddie would never forgive him if something did happen and she wasn't there.

* * *

 _So Mr. Malevsky was up to some naughty tricks there disconnecting Jamie's catheter, wasn't he? I think he's decided to get his kicks by letting Jamie suffer for a bit while turning his attention to a slightly louder target now as he's got his eyes on Danny who is laying into Detective Fowler presently. The waking up from the block was for my daughter who had that happen earlier than expected after surgery to plate a badly broken arm (soccer, of course) and the fire part was for a friend of mine that broke her leg in three places in a car accident last December. Her now-husband said that's how he knew she needed more meds, she would complain her leg was on fire. Next, Jamie is on his way to Columbia in New York without his wife once more, while Danny steps further into the investigation and Eddie spends the night at the hotel alone where she winds up having a much-needed emotional release when she finds a few treasured items there._

 _For JamieandEddieLuv who asked how many chapters there are in this story, the honest answer is I have no flipping idea yet. I'm presently stringing together a bunch of pre-written ones somewhere in the mid-70's and can't even hazard a guess how many more there will be after that... definitely a few more shockers and tragedies involved for more than one of our favorite characters and even some of the new OC's waiting in the wings._


	29. Chapter 29

Chapter 29

"You again," Detective Fowler sighed as he looked up from his desk to spot a scowling scruffier-than-usual-faced Daniel Reagan standing there after hearing an agitated knock on the glass. "I already told your father's watchdog, Detective Nucifero, that I would update him if anything new came in. Did your brother have anything useful to say when he got out of surgery?" he asked as he stood up and made his way over to the file cabinet before opening it and busily sorting through some folders as he pointedly declined to ask his guest into the office.

"No, he had nothing," Danny admitted with a heavy frown as he walked in the door anyway, determined not to throw this guy off on any tangent with talk of his dead brother's blue car for now. "He's still pretty doped up," he admitted, completely unaware of what had just transpired back at the hospital or the fact that Jamie was scheduled to be airlifted in just hours now. "They're flying him back to New York tomorrow afternoon in case you want to, I don't know… do your job or anything," he finished contentiously.

"You mean you think I might ask him something you haven't already thought of?" Fowler grinned as he returned to his desk and sat back down deliberately in his chair. "Somehow I seriously doubt that's the case. That's one trip I can save myself. You've got my number," he contended. "Call me if he remembers anything with that failsafe memory of his you told me about."

"So that's it? You're just gonna file this as soon as I walk out the door, right?" Danny growled while shaking his head. "What's with you people down here? Is it in the water or the funny smoke in the elevators? No wonder our government runs the way it does! No one can work together!"

"Hey, I'm not gonna lie to you, and give me a break… you guys do the exact same thing up there in the great NYPD, and you know it. Officially it stays open, but am I going to be here late every night busting my hump over it?" Fowler asked. "Not a chance in hell. Sorry if that pisses you off… you look like you don't need much incentive in that department, anyway."

"Hey, let me tell you something... I guess we're not the same then," Danny bristled. "If I ever got killed, murdered, or run down like an animal in the street like my kid brother did, I hope the detective investigating is mad as hell, too. You know why? 'Cause that's the guy who's gonna stay up at night, sleepless, wondering if he missed something. That's the guy who's gonna eat, drink and sleep the case until it's solved. You know how I know that? 'Cause I'm that guy. I do what I gotta do."

"Yeah, so do I," Fowler snapped back, unimpressed with that tirade. "One of me versus thirty open cases. I do what I gotta do too… and that's by not wasting my time going down dead-end streets. No video, no witnesses… some broken glass on the street. The lab techs will have a field day with that maybe… I don't know, six months from now," he pointed to the large, open manilla envelope on the counter labeled with Jamie's name and case file. "An out-of-towner with no known enemies here to do this. Tell me what I'm missing, will ya? Just bad timing on his part and the fact that the cameras were down sucks, but that happens all the time down here too. We canvassed the businesses on the street for surveillance videos, but half of them you can barely make out a vehicle, let alone color or make and without a witness to tell us what to look for, there's nothing really to go on. Most of them wipe their tapes every few days so if he doesn't come up with something soon, don't bother. Next," he added as he flipped a folder onto another pile on his desk.

"You mean you didn't get copies?" Danny barked back incredulously.

"Not in the budget," Fowler scoffed. "Like there really is one... just something I say. Look, I get it… he's your brother. Odds are this was some drunk political intern just out of school who doesn't know how to hold his liquor at one of those power dinners up on the Hill. Happens all the time here. Don't waste your energy. If it was anyone important that car disappeared within the hour anyway and is probably be crushed down to the size of a suitcase by now."

"So what _do_ you have?" Danny demanded as he grabbed the envelope and walked over to the table to dump the contents of Jamie's evidence folder on it. All that slid out was a small bag of glass fragments and a few photos of the scene which turned his stomach as they clearly showed the pool of blood from his brother's injury in relation to where the glass was located… a distance of over twenty-five feet. "This is it? Why isn't the glass at the lab? Did you do an accident reconstruction on scene? Where's his phone? He was talking on it when he was hit. The medics didn't bring it in with him."

"No phone and the techs took their glass samples… said there wasn't much there… nowhere near a whole piece to put together, and best they could do was try to match it to a manufacturer. Said it might not even be from the same car… looked like it was old," Fowler revealed as stood up to walk out of the room. "The tech guys did their laser voodoo and took some measurements at the scene but won't waste their time on a full reconstruction unless the vic dies… sorry... or we go to trial. Gotta go fax this," he offered on the way out.

"Well, then you won't mind if I take a sample myself," Danny muttered as he slipped an empty letter-sized envelope off the desk and poured a small amount of the glass in after he pulled up the tape and folded up a couple of the photo printouts. Fowler was none the wiser as he walked back in the room while the NYPD detective was carefully slipping the evidence into his breast pocket with his back turned.

"Some kinda storm coming in for this weekend," Fowler mused as he read a weather report sheet he had picked up on the way back in the room. "I expect that's why you'll all be leaving tomorrow," he added optimistically. "Can't say it was a pleasure."

"Me either, thanks for nothing," Danny snarked back before turning to leave with one last comment under his breath as he walked down the hall. "But I'm not so sure you've seen the last of me yet," he added, determined to check out a few more things before any such decision was made.

###

Eddie sighed as she reluctantly slipped the provided hotel keycard into the door lock later that evening and entered the room, immediately picking up on Jamie's familiar scents… his favorite soap, toothpaste, shampoo and deodorant all lined up neatly in the bathroom in their appropriate places in his travel kit exactly as he had left them the previous day before stepping out to go to that dinner and then of course into the street and in front of the car. She had just finished watching through a hallway window from inside the hospital as her husband, Rick and Dr. Kenzie had been airlifted off the helipad minutes after nine o'clock, and now completely emotionally and physically spent, she was waiting for someone to call and confirm that they had indeed landed safely back in New York at Columbia… Jamie's new home for the foreseeable future. He was due for at least two follow-up surgeries in the coming week that she had been told of, although no one had exactly shared that nifty little news byte with him yet. That was something to discuss tomorrow, or for Kenzie herself to explain whenever he was aware enough to comprehend what needed to be done. Eddie felt like she had chickened out on that tonight by not bringing it up the few times he had been awake again, but then again he had been so tired and confused about some things she didn't have the heart, or maybe the courage to approach it, especially since he was being whisked away out of her reach once more. For today she felt it was enough for him to see what had been done rather than force him to start accepting what was still coming. An uneasiness had settled in her heart when Kenzie had pointedly asked him that question about what he could feel in the lower leg coupled with her previous disclosure about nerve damage. Eddie was starting to put the pieces together… that it might mean there was permanent damage that would affect Jamie for the rest of his life, but had been too frightened of the answer to confront the doctor about it alone and thus far could not even bring herself to approach the topic with Frank. The thought that her husband could lose the ability to do the things that made Jamie who he was… a great cop, an avid athlete… a dedicated father, was just too overwhelming, and she simply couldn't deal with it so it was pushed away for now behind a closed door.

She set her own woefully under-packed bag down on the floor and trailed her fingers down the nicely appointed desk, ignoring a few somewhat tattered shopping bags that were sitting on top of it as she focused on his closed suitcase laying sideways on a luggage stand by the window. Jamie had a thing about his storing his clothes in drawers recently used by god-knows-who so tended to keep everything of his own carefully packed and sealed in the bag it came in whenever he stayed in a hotel. Needing more than anything at that moment to feel close to him, she unzipped the main compartment and sorted through the neatly folded items in there, settling on a soft 'Property of Harvard' t-shirt and a pair of comfortable sweatpants he sometimes slept in when he was cold. Both held his scent, and it wasn't long before she was curled up on the bed while dressed in them, having taken a quick shower and now searching for the needed release that would not come in spite of all the tears that had fallen freely in the last twenty-four hours or so. Her emotions were raw and edgy, so she had requested to be left to herself to sort through them, but sitting alone in that room now with all of his things here and with him so far away had just intensified everything she was feeling to the point where it was jammed up and would not spill over. The last time this had happened was when she had shot and killed that man in the quad while on the job… her first shooting... when even the movie "Remember the Titans" had failed to do its prescribed duty. That night the only comfort she found was in Jamie's presence, and, according to the text that had just flashed on the screen of her phone from Rick, he was now landed safely hundreds of miles away from her, sedated again for the trip and unaware they were apart once more.

Unable to sleep despite exhaustion, unable to cry despite her intense sorrow, Eddie lay back on the bed and stared at the ceiling, counting the minutes until they flew home to follow him the next morning and wondering what to do about… well, everything, having been suddenly thrust into the unfamiliar role of decision maker. After a full hour her eyes eventually drifted down to the television set, wondering if a break in the silence would help lull her to sleep when they lit on those shopping bags once more.

Curious, she slid to the end of the bed and pulled them over wondering why they seemed torn until it occurred to her that Jamie had probably been carrying them when he was struck. Indeed it had been under Detective Nucifero's direction that one of the men from Frank's detail had carefully gathered up what he could from the roadway after the accident and placed them here after the MPDC determined like everything else it seemed that they were not needed in the investigation. Like a kid at Christmas, her attention was drawn to the biggest prize first, apparently purchased from a toy store given the name on the packaging. She carefully pulled out a bent and damaged box and finally offered a small, choked laugh at the contents… a soft, plush smiling blond girl doll wearing a blue jumper proudly proclaiming "Big Sister!" and cradling a smaller, unisex but equally happy-looking baby version attached with velcro and complete with a curly cue spot of hair, a removable diaper, a bottle and a rattle.

"Oh, munchie… I think that's supposed to be you!" Eddie smiled as she put a hand on her tummy and suddenly felt less alone while she took in more than just the comforting appearance of the toy… the fact that it was obviously meant for Kaylin spoke volumes in that Jamie had faith their baby was going to be okay in spite of the news that had been delivered by Dr. Geisner what felt like a lifetime and not just a few days ago. It gave her a tiny bit of hope for the moment and a much-needed path forward. Feeling just a bit naughty now for snooping through his Christmas shopping as she was nosily prone to do at times, she considered stopping for the briefest second before curiosity won out once more and another small bag fell open. A well-padded nylon pouch revealed the next prize… a boisterously loud pair of Mario Andretti signature checkered flag sunglasses and Eddie giggled as she put them on and modeled in front of the mirror. Ever since that first night as partners when she had torn away from the precinct in the RMP as a fresh rookie, the difference in their driving styles had become a running joke between the two of them and he had often referred to her as the famed race car driver whenever it was her turn to get behind the wheel. Guessing now that it would be some time, if ever, until Jamie could enjoy a solo spin in his beloved Mustang, she frowned and pulled the glasses off, sadly wrapping them up and carefully putting them back in the case. Suddenly none of that seemed funny anymore.

Firmly entrenched back in her melancholy mood, Eddie contemplated the last bag… another small one from a kitschy kiosk chain-brand name known for personalized little creations she recognized from their own local mall and sighed. _Figures he found one of those down here,_ she thought. Of all his weaknesses, and even though he verged on OCD neat freakness at times, Jamie's biggest fault by far was being a sucker for family stuff like this and she'd had to start steering him away from that store ever since they moved into their own home and had room to accumulate cute little knick knacks on the shelves. "Probably just our Christmas ornaments for this year and now they're broken anyway," she reasoned while pulling out a pair of matching white, flat jewelry boxes that rattled as if there were many loose pieces inside. "Will you even be home in time for it? What were we supposed to be, Harvard?" she wondered and considered the now sad upcoming holiday. "Are we a bunch of happy elves riding on a sleigh? Or a group of three… no make that four snowmen with a cat smiling by a tree?" she added in deference to the new baby and Bear who by all accounts must be included as an equal-rights member of the family. Expecting nothing more than a disappointing reminder of what had been shattered anyway, she slid the cover off the first box and pulled back the cotton batting to reveal a sight that broke the dam and instantly had tears spilling down her face uncontrollably as she dropped to the floor clutching a heartfelt momento that touched her very core after a lifetime of feeling alone and insecure about her place in her own family.

In her hands was a simple, inexpensive silver necklace with a heart charm and a brilliant blue-glass bead to signify Kaylin's sapphire September birthstone along with tag stamped with her birthdate and a pair of similarly adorned flat metal rings hanging on the chain… one small and one big. The first read in black hand-tooled lettering "Marriage Made You Family" followed by the second larger "Love Makes You My Daughter."

Openly bawling by this point, Eddie pawed aside the lid of second box to find an almost identical piece clearly meant for her so that she and Kaylin could share a symbol of the special bond between them even with a new baby on the way. On the larger ring of this one was the phrase "Love Makes You My Mommy."

Short of his marriage proposal, this was the single most precious thing that Jamie had ever done for her. He had listened to her worries over how Kaylin would view her place both now and later in their soon to be bigger blended family with both an adopted and biological child… this simple gesture bespoke his unselfish love for both of them… a love that had very nearly been extinguished in the last day and that still faced many upcoming challenges which unbeknownst to her would have him questioning his own place in the family and whether he could ever fulfill his role of husband and father ever again.

While Eddie cried herself to sleep in a flood of tears on a lonely hotel bed that night while clad in her husband's clothing and clutching a soft set of dolls for company, three stories down below in front of that same building a stubborn, pissed off detective was putting his nose to the street in an effort to eat, drink and sleep the case of just who hit his little brother in Washington effing DC until it was solved. When a few minutes of attentive searching through the bushes and surrounding area with a penlight revealed a carelessly overlooked phone lying broken and now-smashed in the quiet side street gutter yards away from where Jamie had come to rest, his Irish blood began to boil and he knew he would never forgive himself if he let more evidence disappear in such a lackadaisical investigation. He bagged the device even though it likely held nothing useful anymore and noted its precise location on one of the photos he had pilfered from the evidence pile before pulling out his own phone and making a call he prayed he would not come to regret.

"Hey babe, it's me… about tomorrow…" he started.

* * *

 _Uh oh, so Detective Danny Reagan is on the case now, but where will that leave him with Linda... a wife he had flatly promised to be back in time for her very important Friday afternoon neuro testing appointment? Next, Frank and Garrett touch base as they start to rebuild their working relationship to a degree, and Kenzie and Rick also chat about what might be next for them while a few more pairs of eyes take careful notice of the arrival of one Sergeant Jamison Reagan among their midst at Columbia. Surely Mason Malevsky did not find a way to beat them back to New York, or did he? Remember our boy J has a knack for falling into complex investigations, even when he's not fully conscious or aware of them, lol._


	30. Chapter 30

Chapter 30

"Cripes, what time is it?... Seriously? Ah, man don't you _ever_ sleep? I'm supposed to be getting my beauty rest. So who is this new guy that's got you all riled up, anyway? I mean it doesn't really bug me and I got a right to know who bumped me off the table, don't I? I ain't got my whole life to wait around anymore you know. Spent enough of the past four years in places like this. I got things to do."

"Couldn't tell you that yet, haven't really been able to get close to him. Kenzie keeps the surgical ward on lockdown and I swear that damn overnight charge nurse has night-vision eagle eyes and trip wires set up over there… makes me walk around the whole effing block because she won't let me cut through that hallway. He came in by chopper overnight from Washington with the doc and some other one on board though… Fellows, I think his name is… pretty sure I ran into him a few years back, but I thought he put his papers in. That much I saw when they walked by after bringing the kid off the elevator. I heard the director sent the bird down there special just to pick him up. Looks familiar, but I just can't place him. Didn't come through my unit. Seems like he's in rough shape though… not pretty like you, Cupcake. Maybe when you get back in there later on today, you can get me some intel on him."

"Hey, I always look fine… but that's weird, right? No one else here ever came in like that… he's fresh. You think she pulled him from Bethesda? Wasn't she going down there to try to get more research cases?"

"Yeah, that's what she said. Has to be someone important though if they're making such a fuss. Something's been going on around here lately, I just haven't come up with what."

"You're a dangerous man when you're confined and bored, Commander, but I'm getting pumped full of the good juice today… I won't give a damn about anyone else. You want to do recon on him? Try to get a hall pass from the doc to visit me."

"I might do that… I just might."

###

"You're up early," Garrett commented as he was cleared by the posted detail to enter the hotel dining room before hours where he found his boss sitting alone, already dressed in his customary dark three-piece suit while reading DD5 reports on his laptop and having coffee with a light breakfast.

"Couldn't sleep," Frank admitted as he took a deliberate sip and looked up at his DCPI. "I suppose I could say the same about you."

"Guess we both have things on our mind today," Garrett admitted as he grabbed an empty cup off of one of the other tables and poured himself some of the fragrant black brew from the carafe while he sought to guide the conversation away from his own issues. "Did you get any word last night?"

"Only that they landed safely just after 10:30 and that it was a smooth flight, Jamie traveled well and seemed to settle in once they got there. Dr. Kenzie assured me she would call if there were any concerns, but that otherwise everyone needed their rest including her. She has an important surgery to perform on another patient today I gather. Erin is allowed to visit after nine, but there's a rather strict protocol to get in there because of the proprietary nature of the study so we're restricted to immediate family for visitors for the length of his stay."

"And how long will that be?"

"Honestly, I was afraid to ask that question. Dr. Kenzie said she wanted to meet with us again when we're home and Jamie is able to be present to map out the next week in more detail. Beyond that I don't know, I don't think anyone really does at this point."

"That seems like it will be toughest on Eddie," Moore observed as decided to color his coffee with a little cream anyway, finding it too strong and bitter even for his normally stalwart taste… apparently the Commissioner had ordered the high octane variety today. "She appeared to be taking it hard in the car on the way down," he explained.

"The women always do, don't they?" Frank asked pointedly with a glance at the ring on his old friend's finger.

"How did you know?" Garrett asked with a small huff but no eye contact as his spoon clanged against the side of the cup.

"I'm the Police Commissioner, I know everything."

"I wonder now, just how many times I've heard that before... and yet, it always seems to surprise me," Moore conceded and there was a long silence between the two men before he was ready to continue.

"What did you come down here to say, Garrett?"

"That when Cynthia told me a few weeks ago she was planning to leave the city for Sam's birthday and go south to her family this week to get away from everything that reminded her of his death… I felt it was my duty to go with her instead of come to this meeting… to support her, you know? He was my stepson, I loved him, but he was her own flesh and blood. What I didn't realize was how far we had drifted apart again these last months… that I was angry and only seeing her as an obligation now just like I had come to view my job, and that she saw me as one of the reminders she wanted to get away from. I was served with divorce papers on Tuesday right before she left alone for Georgia," he revealed with a downturned look. "I guess it's really over this time," he admitted as he twirled that unnecessary ring in a circle.

"I'm sorry to hear that," Frank offered with a frown and a heavy sigh as he pursed his lips and chose his words carefully. "Losing a child is not easy," he admitted as he stared straight ahead and considered his own experience and what the probable effect on his marriage might have been. "It's the little things that hit you out of the blue more so than the dates you can circle on the calendar. In a way if it had to be… I'm glad Mary left us first. If she had been here for Joe… well, I can't imagine her grief. He was my son, but the bond between a mother and child isn't tangible to a man I don't think… No parent should ever bury their own, but seeing one suffer in pain… it's not much better," he added as he considered what his youngest was experiencing.

"It's worse when you have guilt over the situation that put him there," Moore admitted. "Well, to be honest, Cynthia and I both owned a share of that. I knew all along it was wrong to enable him, and so did she... we just never found our way out of it. I thought if I turned him against me that she would be gone too. Turns out I was right… now I have nothing."

" _The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother,_ " Frank quoted. "Theodore Hesburgh."

"Well, another wise man also once told me how men are supposed to apologize to one another," Garrett continued as he looked up and met his boss's gaze directly for the first time. "All I have left is my work, Frank… I know I let this get to me there too, and that forced you to the point where you're shopping around for a new cleanup hitter because I've been standing at the plate lately and caught looking too many times without taking the bat off my shoulder. What's worse is I let the team down and cost us a few games. I'd like to have a chance to hit one on the screws again though," he revealed. "I have a favor to ask even if it's not in an official capacity anymore."

"And what's that?"

"Between men? I need to make something right… to show some respect. When I sat and listened to Rick in that meeting of the House Committee yesterday," he explained. "I realized how vitally important the work he and Jamie are doing on the EDP issue. That could have easily been Sam in a situation like that… well, it would have been if he had made it any further down the road. I can't help him anymore, but someone else's son or daughter… maybe. I let them down with the mayor, and that could very well threaten their program if it gets politicized. I'd… I'd like to step in and pinch hit to help out… do some of the mundane organization work, focus on the PR… whatever it takes to keep it moving forward until your son is able to do the job that he was meant to again."

Frank sat back and considered that. In all honesty, Jamie was probably months away from being able to resume any of his duties… and that was the optimistic take on it. No one had the guts to come out and admit what they all feared just yet… that some if not all of this was indeed permanent, and that his days on the street doing the job that he loved and was in his blood had ironically come to an end on the very same type of macadam roadway two nights before.

"Nobody gets mushy?" he asked as his mustache tightened while he considered accepting the DCPI's apology.

"Trust me on this… nobody has to hug it out," Garrett agreed with a hopeful glint in his eyes.

###

"Well, how'd our boy do last night? You do realize I brought him here because I trust my staff, don't you? I know you promised the Commissioner you'd keep an eye on him, but you could have slept on the couch in the lounge at least," Kenzie remarked while she walked into Jamie's room in her surgical ward the following morning as Rick's feet slipped off the end of the bed where he had propped them and he lazily stretched his arms over his head in the surprisingly comfortable padded side chair before smirking and opening his mouth to answer her.

"Is that where _you_ stayed? 'Cause if I would have known..." Rick asked with a sly grin, deciding that was maybe taking things a little too far, too soon though. "This was like staying at the Ritz, anyway," he covered. "Reagan slept like...

"...a drugged up baby," came the muttered, raspy interrupting reply from the bed though as a pair of still-tired hazel eyes slowly opened to join them. "Except when some nurse was coming in here to take blood, or give blood, shoot me full of this or that, shove a thermometer in my ear, or either the damn pressure cuff or that freaking ice machine you've got me wrapped in was going off like every six minutes. Seriously, this is getting a little old, guys," Jamie sighed as he regarded the new room clearly in his vision for the first time, vaguely remembering the previously explained details about the trip back to New York.

"Hmm, awake and complaining about the very best care money can buy like a typical man… I'd say you're coming along," Kenzie acknowledged as she did a bit of her own observation and pulled out her stethoscope to check his chest. "Breathing easier? You can thank me for taking that little tube out while you were napping by the way."

"Yeah, thanks for putting in there in the first place."

"Ouch! I'm not feeling the love here, Sergeant Reagan," Kenzie laughed as she undid the velcro on the automatic ice therapy wrap on his leg to check for swelling and drainage.

"God, I'll never get used to seeing _that,"_ Jamie grimaced and closed his eyes at the sight of the metal screwed into his leg again. "Can't imagine what it _feels_ like… oh, no wait, I can. I'll have nightmares the rest of my life. Looks like I got attacked by a some crazy mad scientist with a drill and an erector set."

"Ha! See now that's exactly what I called her," Rick nodded with a smirk back at Kenzie. "Plus she has this crazy notion that I'm gonna pay her back by taking her out for Thai food sometime, too… on my public servant's salary. Can you imagine? With her appetite that could bankrupt me in no time… you're gonna need to cough up at least half. Sorry, pal. No disrespect intended there."

"Okay, see now if you're gonna gang up on me with this evil one when you're awake, then I'm just going to have to find a way to keep you quiet. What's the pain at, Jamie? Scale of one to ten… ten being what you experienced yesterday," she asked with a raised eyebrow that dared him to lie to her.

"Leg? Pretty much zero," he admitted. "Ribs… four maybe."

"So a six," she translated as she reached over to the button to deliver another controlled dose for him. "Jamie, it is critically important you learn to manage your pain through this, especially when the block comes off the leg. Right now your biggest risk is pulmonary, and if you are stubborn and not pushing that little button enough, and I know you're not since I can read the output, duh, Harvard boy… that risk goes up exponentially higher because whether you are trying to or not you'll wind up taking shallow breaths that compromise your lung function. We're going to start you with a respiratory therapist this morning."

"Oh, goodie," he sighed, remembering his trials and tribulations with Addison and the stupid little blue balls in the little plastic thingy from hell. "I hate the drugs," he admitted pointedly even as he began to feel the effects of them once again. "They make me fuzzy and talk... about stupid stuff… I didn't even know my own wife," he admitted the one that he knew hurt Eddie the most. "I can't do something like that to her again. She's pregnant… and our baby… I can't," he said shaking his head, thinking about their… what was it now? An avocado or an onion? Suddenly he couldn't remember anymore and lost his train of thought completely. "I'm sorry, what? Is Eddie here?"

"She's flying up from Washington this morning with your father. I expect she'll be here around two. Jamie, you're going to have a lot of gaps this week, it's inevitable," Kenzie offered, but stopped herself from going into any more talk about the upcoming surgeries as it was clear he was struggling at the moment and she did not want to drive him back towards another anxiety attack or away from the necessary pain control. "What we are going to do is give you something a little stronger that's short-acting to make you comfortable while we change these dressings, and then we'll have Marla come in and work on your breathing a bit before nine. I understand you're expecting a visitor this morning," she added as he looked back at her puzzled, suddenly muddled in his thoughts.

"Your sister, Erin, is coming," Rick explained with a frown, not caring to see his normally sharp-minded friend scrambled again this way. There was no denying that even a small amount of narcotics played funny games with Jamison Reagan's mind, but as Kenzie had implied their usage was a matter of life and death at this point.

"Erin, okay… she's my sister," Jamie conceded as he regurgitated the provided info and lay his head back on the pillow to close his eyes while a soft warm buzz descended once more.

###

"Hey, Dad… you got a minute?" Danny asked as he stood back from Frank's table in the dining room, obviously looking for the opportunity for a private conversation.

"I'll... just be going to check the latest weather report," Garrett conceded his spot quickly as it certainly seemed like Frank's oldest son had something on his mind. "Good morning," he nodded on his way past Danny.

"What? Jamie nearly gets killed down here, and the investigation is a joke, so? Now we're square with him again?" Danny nodded with contempt in Moore's departing direction.

"Daniel…" Frank trailed off with a sigh. In his more contentious moments he had shared the same thought, but had resigned to put that behind him now in an effort to move forward and Garrett had appeared genuinely contrite. "What is it that's bothering you this morning, son?"

"You mean aside from the fact that Jamie nearly got killed down here and the investigation is a joke? Just that, Dad! Fowler's done and written it off and there's still evidence out there… I know it," he said and pulled his brother's damaged phone out of his pocket and slid the bag over towards Frank. "This was still laying out in the street over by the corner last night. Who knows what else they missed? He plain told me that the glass they collected won't go through the lab until it's a cold day in hell, and that there won't be any accident scene reconstruction done from what little they did record because my little brother didn't die and the genius can't remember what kind of effing car hit him! There has to be some kind of fire you can light down here! This isn't right!"

"Dan, I have no leverage to push anywhere," Frank conceded. "I burned my bridges with the mayor and PC before this even happened. I regret it, but that's done. Sometimes your old man is a hardass, and this time it came back to bite us."

"There has to be something! What about that Atwater Congress guy that Jamie was meeting with? Rick said he liked him, maybe he could pull some strings…"

"No."

"Dad! C'mon! What are we doing here?! You want me to just let this go? He's my brother, I can't!" Danny ranted as he slammed his hand on the table, drawing the attention of one of the detail men posted at the doorway before he settled back in place.

"He's my son... I have to," Frank frowned and looked at his oldest knowingly. "Officially, anyway."

"You giving me some rein?"

"I'm telling you to get the son of a bitch… but I can't give you anything down here to work with."

"What about at home?" Danny asked as he pulled out his small bits of contraband including the envelope of glass and photos as he added them to the pile with Jamie's smashed phone.

"Do I need to ask where you got those?"

"Probably better if you didn't," Danny conceded with a bit of a wry grin. "But if these could somehow find their way up to Mike Becker in forensics in that big fancy building across the way from 1PP, and if he could maybe somehow get whatever measurements were taken at the scene that night, then maybe we'd have something to go on when I get copies of the surveillance tapes from whatever stores I can find down the street here."

"And how are you planning on doing that with our plane taking off in less than four hours and a blizzard coming in later tonight? Don't you have somewhere important to be with Linda this afternoon?"

"I talked to her, Dad. Her appointment starts at four. If I hang around down here and hit these places in the morning and catch a ride with Garrett to pick up Eddie's car at the garage outside of Baltimore by lunch, I can make it back in time to meet Linda at the doctor by then."

"Danny, I know this is important to you… it's important to me and the rest of the family, but take this bit of advice I learned from your mother... what Linda is facing is one of the most intimately painful things a woman can go through, and you _absolutely_ do not want to be the guy that lets her down. Not now… not after what the two of you went through this past year and a half. Given the choice between finding out who hit him and peace in your family… your brother wouldn't want that for you either."

"I know that… and I'm not gonna. I promise you, Dad. But I can't just walk away if I know I didn't do everything I could here either, and I'm running out of time… I got cold case files in my drawer, we all do, but this one's got Jamie's face on it. That's gotta count for something too."

* * *

 _Well, let's hope Danny takes that fatherly guidance under consideration and bugs out early enough to get to Linda's appointment, or no doubt there will be a high price to pay between them. Next, Detective Reagan stumbles onto a possible lead even though he's not sure what he has, while Eddie travels back to the city with Frank, and Erin checks in on her little brother. After her initial shock, she will be the first Reagan to admit a certain truth before starting to advocate for him in a way that will bring her into direct conflict with her new sister-in-law._


	31. Chapter 31

Chapter 31

"Hi, Dad… no, I'm here, but waiting to be allowed in... The nurse just told me that a respiratory therapist is still in the room with him and asked that I stay out for a few more minutes until she's finished," Erin explained as she was pacing around in a small, but comfortably appointed waiting room in a fifth-floor wing of a brand new modern research building as she paused to look out the window at the rest of the impressive 20-acre Columbia University Medical Center in northern Manhattan. "No, please tell Eddie I don't think there's any problem… she said they were just running a little behind on getting him all settled with everything that needed to be done this morning because they flew in so late. She said that the doctor was already in to see him and they changed his dressings… asked me if I minded being in there while they brought breakfast for him so that sounds okay, right?... I mean it's good because he usually doesn't eat that well in a place like this so I can make sure he does."

"Sweetheart, now remember what I told you," Frank cautioned his sometimes over-emotional daughter volunteered for this duty over the objections of Henry who had been asked to remain with Kaylin and Nicki back in Bay Ridge while she made the hour trip north to the campus. "Dr. MacKenzie said she would be taking that metal contraption off his leg later this week and she's made sure he can't feel it right now, okay?… But it is hard to look at... I don't want you to be upset in front of him."

"I promise… I mean I've seen things like that in photos from other accident victims before, right?" Erin admitted as she chewed a freshly scrubbed fingernail anxiously. If her father was warning her about it yet again, it must be pretty bad. "I've prosecuted their cases and even met some in person while they were still at the hospital and I've had to go in and take their statements. I'll be fine."

"It's not the same when it's your own brother, honey," Frank advised gently.

"Okay, well you should see this place," Erin adeptly changed the subject as he was making her more nervous with that warning, and if there was anything she hated it was to see the baby of the family hurt in any way. After Jamie had been born, Erin had been of the age to take on a lot of mothering duties from Mary, and then later after her death had carried on that special bond with her youngest sibling. "It's absolutely state-of-the-art and locked down better than Fort Knox. You have to walk through this special germ-zapping lighting and there's no cell phones allowed past the security checkpoint on each floor so I won't be able to call once I go back there unless there are regular phones in the rooms. What exactly do they do here? I mean it took me a half hour to go through all their bio protocols just to get upstairs. It's a good thing Pop didn't come although he was really mad about that. I've had annual exams that were less thorough."

"Too much information, dear," Frank sighed with a grimace at that imagery. "Dr. MacKenzie's study is proprietary so I'm sure that's the reason for all the added security precautions."

"Well, it must be something big to have all of this to herself," Erin marveled. "She has half the floor on the east side. There must be fifteen or twenty patient rooms plus labs and more that I can't see from here."

"Please God, let's hope that's because she's so successful then," her father sighed. "Listen, Eddie is pretty down this morning, but we're leaving for the airport in a minute. If you get in the back... if there's anyway you can have him speak to her before our flight takes off or at least let us know how he's doing… I think it would really help her."

"Okay, I'll see what I can do. The nurse is on her way back down the hall… I think I'm in."

"Alright, dear… we'll wait to hear from you. Love you," Frank concluded as he hung up the line only to find Eddie hurrying down the hall towards him, dressed for travel with both her and Jamie's luggage in hand just as Abigail Baker exited her room behind her, ready to join them on the flight home since Danny was planning on picking up the car in Baltimore with Garrett now.

"Was that about Jamie?" Eddie asked. "Was it the doctor? Is everything alright?"

"It was Erin," Frank informed with a small but deliberately confident smile before nodding to his bodyguard and assistant as she joined them. "Jimmy, would you help her out with those?" he asked. "She's on her way in to see him right now," he continued to explain as they stepped into the elevator. "They were finishing up with things and bringing his breakfast now. Everything's fine this morning, sweetheart," he assured.

"But why didn't he call me if things are so good?"

"Well, Erin will find out. She said there's no cell phones permitted in the patient area… and Jamie doesn't have one now anyway, right? Rick stayed with him last night and promised to let us know if there were any concerns and there obviously weren't, so I think everyone just managed to get some sleep. Anyway, we'll be up there soon and you'll see for yourself. She said the place he's at is very impressive… state-of-the-art. I'm sure he's in the best hands."

"But he can't call out? Sounds more like they're hiding something," Eddie declared with a huff as she quickly made her way off the elevator when it opened. "Please let's just get home to him," she begged with a stressed expression and defiant blue eyes as her father-in-law dropped his head behind her while Baker looked on in sympathy. A mere ninety minutes in the air or not, this was going to be a long trip.

###

"He's right back this way," the nurse who had introduced herself as Marguerite Simmons guided Erin down to an isolated hallway and through another set of security doors, pausing to nod and smile at a tall, nearly bald-headed patient with his arm in a tight sling who was standing outside the area watching with intense interest and recognition as the woman made their way through. "Commander," she acknowledged with a small, knowing smile.

"There's no one else in here?" Erin asked as she glanced at the four remaining empty glass-fronted rooms.

"No, this is the surgical wing, and the doctor was out of town for a few days so we didn't have any new customers," Marguerite replied. "There's another young man scheduled for the OR this afternoon so Jamie will have some company next door later on today," she assured. "And here we are," she paused in the doorway to the middle room of the row. "I'll warn you the doctor has insisted he utilize his pain control fully today, even if we have to provide it for him so he's a bit…"

"Goofy," Erin smiled slightly at the woman's reluctant honesty. "We've all been there before with him, don't worry," she assured as she made her way into the fairly spacious modern-appointed room and was relieved to find her little brother sitting up just a bit in the bed staring blankly at a tray on his table with that leg she had been warned about propped up but fully covered from toe to hip in some sort of heavy, thick white blanket leaving the rest to her imagination. "Jamie," she called softly so not to startle him, and despite her resolve, her eyes teared up at the sight of him with obvious visible bruises apparent on his side as he was trying unsuccessfully to lift his left arm high enough to help pull the table closer. "Can I help you with that?" she asked as she put her purse down and quickly brought the chair over to the bed before leaning down to give him a gently hug and kiss, mindful of his ribs. "It's good to see you… Jamie, oh my God, I'm so sorry this happened…"

"Erin," he rasped with a slightly puzzled look on his face once more. "What… um, are you doing here? Where's Ed?" he questioned sadly, and it was clear to his sister that the details of his move were unclear once more. "Why didn't she come? I think Rick said before he left, but I can't 'member stuff again," he complained as he sat back in frustration. "My side hurts… can't reach it..."

"That's why you need the medicine they gave you. Eddie's on her way, she just wasn't allowed in the helicopter last night, but she's coming... flying up from Washington with Dad right now, I just talked to him and they were on their way to the plane," his sister assured and tried to switch him back to the present. "She'll be here this afternoon and I'll stay with you until then, okay? You're back in New York now, remember?"

"I can go home then?"

"No… not quite yet," she looked at him with sympathy, realizing he was feeling the effects of the drugs and there was no way he'd be able to speak to his wife with any comprehension this morning before she got on the plane although she did note there was a regular phone located bedside so at least she could inform her father of that fact. "Let's try to get you to eat something though?" she encouraged as she pulled the tray closer. "That will probably help you feel better. There's plain yogurt here, you usually like that, or a piece of toast. How about this… looks like honey tea? Jamie?"

###

"And what can I do for you this fine morning, young fella?" an older but still spry bespeckled storekeeper asked as Danny walked in the front door followed by a little ding of the bell above. "A new suit perhaps?" the elderly tailor asked hopefully as he eyed the detective's well-worn work attire he had packed away in his overnight bag almost as an afterthought. "Or one of my finest English overcoats to protect you from what Mother Nature is prepared to show us tonight?"

"No, sir… not today, thanks," Danny smiled in reply as he glanced around the inside of the men's shop which looked to be unchanged since the 1950s maybe… the floorboards were worn and squeaked as he walked over them, although the quality of the available clothing looked quite high. He had very nearly bypassed this particular store on his quest because of the same impression of the exterior, but for the fact he had noticed there was indeed a security camera posted outside with what looked to have a catty corner angled view of the next light on the street. The car that hit Jamie must have either run straight through that well-lit intersection or turned right onto the one-way alley here, and if so and that camera was working it could provide the best angle he could have asked for. At this point it was his last hope as Detective Fowler had been right... footage from every other business camera he had been able to view had proven useless and a glance at his watch showed it to be 11:46 now so time was growing short if he was going to make it back to St. Victor's for four o'clock. Linda had been none-too-pleased with this latest plan, but had conceded without too much of a fuss with his adamant vow to be back on time which he fully intended to keep.

"Well then, what can I help you with?" the older man continued pleasantly as he took out a cloth and wiped the top of his counter. "You look like a man with something on his mind."

"Yes, sir, Mr…?"

"Garibaldi. Camillo Garibaldi. I have been a tailor in this very store for more than fifty years, and my father before that."

"Mr. Garibaldi, my name is Danny Reagan and I'm a police detective from New York City."

"Ah, so you are here about that other young man that was hit by the car in front of the Grand View the other night… also a Reagan," he concluded as his sharp mind made the connection. "I looked for the story in the paper after I hear, but it only mentioned where he was from and why he was here. Too much about the storm coming. Very sorry for what happened to him."

"Yes, sir," Danny nodded. "That was my younger brother. My father is the NYPD Commissioner Frank Reagan."

"And you want to ask if I have anything from the camera outside, yes?" Garibaldi presumed. "The other police from the MPDC… they stop by too, but I am sorry I could not give them anything," he admitted. "Come, I show you," he added and led Danny back to the office where a heavy ancient computer monitor sat on top of an old hard drive on a shelf behind a neatly appointed desk. "My son set that up many years ago… for our protection he said, but he passed last year from cancer. Who steals from a tailor? The ones that don't wear suits? We don't keep very much cash here. He knew how to run this, but I still write out my invoices by hand, yes? I never unplug it. The policeman that was here tried to see what was on there, but only found something that said it could not be opened. Here," he demonstrated and Danny read over his shoulder.

"No suitable decoder module," he sighed and continued with a frustrated sarcastic laugh at the rest of the message. "Unfortunately there is no way for you to fix this," it said. "Nice. Leaves a lot of hope, doesn't it?"

"I am sorry for you," Garibaldi offered sincerely. "I wish I could help you to find the person that would run away like a coward after doing something like that, but I'm afraid this is as much of a dinosaur as I am… maybe it not even work anymore. I should just throw it out in the trash… is useless, yes? I'm about to close up the shop for good after the holidays, anyway. My eyes are finished and my hands shake so my wife and I, we go to Florida with the rest of the snowbirds, heh? Your brother, will he recover?"

"We hope so," Danny replied thoughtfully as he stared at the old equipment and looked at his watch. Garrett was due to pick him up in front of the hotel in less than five minutes, but he decided to spare a few more just in case there was something here. "He's got a lot ahead of him though. Mr. Garibaldi, if you are going to get rid of this stuff anyway, do you mind if I take it? I have a friend back in the city that's a computer whiz and if there's anyone who could do something with it, it's him. I'm just trying to find the person that did this to my brother."

"Of course, of course!" the old man agreed as he turned it off and began pulling the plugs out and wrapping them up. "I find a box for it, and you come pick out something nice in my store to give him my best wishes. I read he was here helping veterans from your city. My Pauly served for a few years after school until he decided that being here like his father and grandfather before was not such a terrible thing. God rest his soul. He was a good boy too."

###

"Did you manage to get him to take anything in?" Marguerite inquired as she came back in the room after being summoned by a warning buzzer on one of Jamie's IV lines.

"A few spoonfuls of yogurt and a bite or two of toast," Erin sighed as she looked over at her now-quiet brother. "He fell back asleep pretty quickly though… doesn't seem to have much energy," she worried.

"Well, that's not a bad start," the nurse tried to assure as she checked the bag that was near dry and pulled up the computer cart to make notations before pulling out another one to replace it. "He's been through quite a bit the past few days… it'll take some time to rebound from that. Now, Mrs. Reagan, I need to flush the line to his leg and do a few other things, plus he needs a break from the cold wrap here so I'm going to remove it and possibly adjust some dressings. There's a chair in the hall if you prefer to wait out there."

"It's Miss… I'm Jamie's sister, and no… I want to stay with him," Erin decided as she sadly smoothed down some of his wayward hair and let her fingers run down his scratchy two-day-old scruffy face. "He hates looking a mess like this though. Maybe we can get him cleaned up a little before his wife gets here so he feels better? She's on her way up from Washington now."

"Of course, one of our male nurses is a wizard with a razor, and Jamie's not on blood thinners due to the spleen injury so that's not contraindicated. As you can imagine more than a few of our patients are fussy about such things, it's ingrained in them to be clean-cut at all times."

"Like that man that was standing outside?" Erin wondered. "You called him commander? He looked like his pajamas were pleated and pressed. I've never seen anyone in a hospital look that well dressed."

"Yes," Marguerite laughed as she hung the new bag and adjusted the drip. "I believe Commander Rigsby would find a way to look like that even if he had two bad arms. Now I'll warn you this next part isn't so pretty… you might not care to see," she added as she began to undo the velcro and lift the ice wrap off of Jamie's leg. "I'll try to be quick about it."

Erin's eyes widened in shock and she began to shake ever so visibly even as she clutched her brother's hand. "Oh, Jamie," she murmured as she kissed his forehead and shielded his face from the sight when he stirred slightly. "It's so… swollen and bruised," she noted softly to the nurse as she looked up, terrified of the answers but determined to learn what she needed to know to advocate for her brother. "And he can't even bend his knee like that?"

"Not at this point, no," Marguerite confirmed as she went about her work efficiently as promised. "He's scheduled to have this external fixator removed by the end of the week in the second upcoming surgery and then the rehab specialist will start to work with him, but it will probably be a slow process," she conceded. "Our people are quite skilled though," she added with obvious pride. "And Dr. MacKenzie is the very best… if there's any way to bring him back to full function, she'll find it. I've seen that in just the short time we've had the clinic here. We've had some amazing results already."

"If…" Erin emphasized as she came to a painful realization that perhaps this would never be over for her little brother and that his chosen career on the street with the NYPD had already been ended. "But that's not a guarantee, is it?"

"I'm afraid not," the nurse admitted as she finished and pulled a light blanket over to conceal it once more.

* * *

 _So, it looks like Erin might be a bit more capable of looking after her brother's comforts and facing some truths before Eddie will be ready to admit them herself. Next, Frank and his still edgy daughter-in-law arrive home for a brief stopover in Bay Ridge where they encounter a surprise or two at the house, and Grandpa is forced to step in to explain a few things to Kaylin before she makes another dive under the furniture while Danny runs into a delay or two on his own return to the city before we have another Jamko reunion and finally a surprise for Linda._

 _For guest reviewer Rita Jean, no fear, this piece will continue with a major focus on our original pair of Jamko lovebirds, but I tend to include the whole family as part of the dynamics, and love a good dose of brotherly angst which has been missing for several seasons on the show before making a bit of a "resurgence" this year in several epis, LOL, so have mixed in a lot of Danny and Linda who are facing their own issues as he continues to pursue the case before it turns on him, a major conflict with Erin and a whole bunch of OCs which is why this has turned into a novel-length installment as I continue to hum along trying to put all these characters and pieces back together again. **To be very clear though** to whoever seriously stepped out of bounds with one of my reviewers (and you know who you are even if I don't), I also appreciate the varied interests of all my readers which help to shape my writing, but do not dictate it. Hopefully in the end there's a little something for everyone._

 _With all that said and because there's no new episode this week a **BONUS-sized Happy BB Friday!** chapter is up tomorrow to keep all these storylines moving along!_


	32. Chapter 32

Chapter 32

"Driftwood in Bay Ridge," had been the order to Frank's driver after they had deplaned over the vehement objections of a small blond-haired force who wanted nothing more than to be taken to northern Manhattan with lights and sirens blazing, but had finally conceded to her father-in-law's plan to stop at the house and visit with Kaylin, Nicki and Henry first. "We'll just stay for a bit while you pack a few more things for the weekend," he had advised after sending Baker and the rest of the staff to the office in another vehicle. "There's a room waiting for you at the Hyatt across the street from the medical campus so you can walk over from there at any time. I need to go to 1PP to make sure everything is settled before the storm comes in, but I'll be up to see him later tonight and Erin has cleared her schedule to be able to stay with you today. Dr. Kenzie would like to have that meeting with us tonight after six since it's likely we'll all be snowed in over the weekend."

"Okay," Eddie sniffed as she stared out the window at the now-familiar neighborhoods they were passing, and was not above offering another serious eye roll when she spotted that now instantly irritating neighbor of theirs as Mason was once again in his yard apparently securing things before the storm. "I'm sorry I was such a… well you know on the plane. I'm just worried and frustrated because I don't know what's going on with Jamie today or these surgeries. Two more next week? How is he supposed to handle that after everything he's already been through?"

"He'll find the strength," Frank assured. "And so will you, sweetheart. This isn't just going to go away in a couple of days. We'll all have to learn to manage and live with his restrictions for a while, but that's what we're here for. You won't have to do this on your own," he added as the car pulled up in front of the house, and the two got out and went quickly up the steps, eager now to be back and with the rest of the family, especially one bright eyed little three-year-old girl.

"Mommy! Grandpa!" Kaylin cried as she quickly opened the door and greeted them there, having spotted them after peering out the window. "Where Daddy?" was the next question to follow though as she looked around after hugging them. "Him in there?" she asked with a happy dance and a nod to the dark SUV waiting at the curb. "Me see him now, p'ease?! Nagyanya say he come home too!" she added while jumping up and down with great excitement.

"Wait, Nagyanya... said what?!..." Eddie trailed off, having completely forgotten that little important detail about her mother's return as she stood up and turned around to face the doorway with Eva also now present there wringing her hands. "MOM! When did you get here?... How could you?... What did you say to her?!"

"Edit, now I know…" Eva tried to pacify her daughter. "This is my fault. She overheard me talking to Henry when I arrived from the airport a few minutes ago, and I said something about Jamison being brought home to New York and she misunderstood. I tried to explain, but she's so excited she hasn't been listening to me. I'm so sorry for confusing her."

"Let me handle this, I'll talk to her. Eddie, you just go inside and catch up with your mother and Pop," Frank stopped things in their tracks before his granddaughter could end up under the furniture again or instigate what he knew would likely be another meltdown for his emotionally overwrought daughter-in-law. "Now, you come here with me little girl," he said as he picked Kaylin up and enveloped her with a hug as he tucked her into his overcoat to keep her warm in the chilly, damp, pre-snowfall air for the short trip to the car where there were fewer places to run and hide. "And the two of us will go have a little talk in Grandpa's batmobile, okay? I have something special for you in there, anyway. I missed you, sweetheart."

"But me miss Daddy," Kaylin insisted sadly even as he sat her down on the backseat before climbing in himself and dismissing his driver so he had a moment of privacy with the little one. "Mommy say he call me, and Nagyanya say he come home… but him not here! Where he?"

"Well, you're getting to be a big girl now, Kaylin Elizabeth, so Grandpa will explain it to you, and you know I always tell you the truth, don't I? Like Pop Pop said your daddy hurt his leg in an accident, do you understand that?" he asked before continuing when she nodded with tears brimming. "Well, he got to fly in a very special helicopter last night and he came to a hospital not too far away from here where they fix hurt people. Now, Auntie Erin went up there to visit him this morning, and she said he was feeling better, but he's been awfully sleepy the last few days. As soon as he wakes up more he will call you, that I can promise… but he won't be able to come home soon, sweetie. He needs the doctor there to fix him and only big people are allowed to see him right now… that's why your Nagyanya came, so that Mommy can go there and someone can stay with you and make sure you get to school so you can practice for your play."

"But me make him feel all better when I hug him… Daddy say so!" Kaylin argued back, unhappy about being excluded like that. "Him say!" she insisted.

"I know, that's why Grandpa got you something special until you're able to do that," Frank offered as he reached for his briefcase and opened it. "This will help more than the medicine and the doctor will," he added as he reached in and pulled out a huge oversized card he had picked up in the hospital gift shop that read "Get Well Soon Daddy" in blank, outlined letters along with a big box of crayons. "I think if you could color this extra special nicely for him so we can hang it in his room, it would make your daddy feel so much better every single time he sees it... he'll know that you are being a good girl and that will help him come home sooner, okay? Can you do that for him? You can work on it all weekend while it snows and Mommy is away. Your love is the best medicine he can get, Kaylin Elizabeth," he promised her as she reached for the card and he gave her a big hug.

###

"Reagan, black crossover, New York plates," Danny advised with a nervous glance at his watch as he walked up to the service desk after Garrett had dropped him off at the dealership Eddie's car had been towed to outside of Baltimore. He'd spent a bit more time with Mr. Garibaldi than he intended, but the older man had been so sincere in his desire to help and offer of something nice to take home for Jamie it had been hard to be rude and leave abruptly until an appropriate lawyer-type tie had been located… and what the hell, it would make a nice Christmas present for the kid and save Linda a future trip to the mall anyway, right? That coupled with the fact Frank's DCPI tended to drive like… well, like a man in his late fifties with no true urgency in that damn big Buick sedan of his had left Danny nervously calculating just exactly how far over the limit he needed to maintain in speed for the remainder of the way back to the city to be at Linda's appointment on time.

"Reagan… oh, yeah," the manager at the desk recalled as he reached behind him to the pegboard and picked up a labeled key fob. "You're the one that had Doug all tied up in knots trying to figure that mess out. He's my best mechanic… said he never saw anything like it. Next time leave the work to the experts, buddy, or you'll wind up frying the whole electrical system and maybe burning up the damn car with the wife and kids inside," he warned. "I won't report it on your record this time or the company will void your warranty."

"The hell are you talking about?" Danny growled back as he was fast losing his patience at the slow response and not-so-subtle hint of indignation in the man's voice. "It's my sister-in-law's new car… they've only ever had it serviced at the dealership or with the roadside tech that came out the other day."

"Yeah, right," the guy laughed. "Your brother did it then; whatever you say, pal. You got a minute? I'll have him put it up on the rack and show you."

"Fine," Danny sighed and gave into the obligation. This was Eddie's car after all, and the one she drove Kaylin around in now plus soon the new baby would be coming. What kind of uncle or brother-in-law would he be if he didn't check this out, he wondered? Surely Linda would be okay with a few minutes of tardiness once he explained this safety issue nonsense.

Those anticipated few minutes turned into twenty before a now highly agitated Danny Reagan was led back into the garage where he found Eddie's car raised up on a lift and the mechanic beckoned him to join him underneath.

"So I followed all the steps to find a parasitic drain after I checked the battery," the man drawled as he flashed his light toward the undercarriage. "Gotta tell you she was giving me fits because I couldn't find the right fuse to pull up top in the regular panel. Damn meter told me there was an overdraw on the battery every time the system went into sleep mode."

"That's interesting, but can we move this along?" Danny inserted impatiently. "This model's been prone to electrical problems, right? They've done the recalls for it. I've heard my brother moan about it since the day his wife picked it out on the lot, and I've got someplace important to be soon," he hedged.

"Look, I pulled all the fuses and relays until I got to the circuit that has the cigarette lighter and power outlets. I thought I had it there because sometimes coins or something like that can fall in the sockets and cause shorts."

"Bingo, then," Danny sighed, wondering what all this fuss was about at this point… blame it on the stupid design of the console if that that occurred regularly. "It was something like that, right? I plugged my charger in on the way down and a few minutes later when I went to restart the car, there was a short and it fried my phone and blew a fuse or whatever. Is it fixed now?"

"Nah, that wasn't it at all," the mechanic with the handlebar mustache and greasy overalls frowned back. "Whoever messed with the harness down here left a bare wire to that circuit crossing the alternator's power cable which had a shorted diode so it was sending amps back up through. That's what fried your phone, pal, and killed the battery."

"Whoever messed with…" Danny frowned as he stepped back and considered that possibility. This didn't make any sense. "You mean you think someone did it deliberately?"

"Well, sir, if this had been like this from the factory they would have had problems driving it off the lot. It's got thirty-five hundred miles on it. Like I said, whoever messed with it this week… the husband or whatever mechanic he claims it was… they caused the issue. I'm lucky I noticed it… had to check the whole damn line. That'll be two-ten plus tax because it's not covered under warranty work," Doug concluded as he turned off his light and walked out from under the car. "Next time tell them to save themselves the trouble and have it replaced by someone who knows what the hell they are doing," he complained with a huff. "Everyone thinks they can watch a goddamn Youtube video at the auto store and do this stuff themselves," he continued as Danny watched with a growing pit in his stomach as the car was being lowered.

Too many coincidences… the old man didn't believe in them. What was it he had said to Linda just yesterday, or was it the day before at this point? That if he didn't know better he would swear someone had planned this?

No one gets that lucky…

It was at that point in this the hairs on the back of his neck tingled and stood up before he performed his customary stress tell and he ran his hand over his head and down the back to smooth them out.

###

"Jamie! You're awake! And why on earth is your hair is sticking straight up?" Eddie sniffed in relief with a small curious smile as rushed over to the bed and immediately began smoothing it down to his more normal semi-spiked fashion while noticing it was still damp before offering him a kiss after finally being cleared and allowed to enter his room later that afternoon.

"Erin's been amusing herself," he admitted with a tiny hoarse huff as his wife took in his now clean-shaven appearance and a bit more life in his eyes although the otherwise pale outline and dark circles surrounding them bespoke of his still-serious condition. "Haven't you, sis?"

"Well, it's fun to play dress up with you again while you're a captive audience who can't fight back," his older sibling laughed as she got up from her chair on the far side and came around to offer Eddie a hug. "It's just like when he was a baby and I put him in doll jumpers and bows when mom wasn't looking because I wanted a little sister instead of another stupid brother," she admitted. "I had to come up with something to do after I tried to bribe the nurse who shaved him leave a goatee so I could at least take a blackmail picture, but he begged him not to and pity won out," she admitted. "Who can refuse those puppy dog eyes on top of this?" she motioned to Jamie's leg concealed under the ice blanket once more.

"Shaved? So you've been up for a while?" Eddie puzzled with a slightly hurt tone and some annoyance at his sister's flippant, almost Kenzie-like bedside manner in the way that she was making light of her husband's serious condition. "But you didn't call me… are you taking your meds? The nurse said it was important that you did that so your breathing was good. They're really worried about pneumonia and other complications, Erin," she firmly reminded her sister-in-law who had seemed to encourage some errant behaviour on her husband's part. "He _has_ to listen to the doctor."

"It wasn't her… I managed to win a reprieve," Jamie admitted as he defended his sister's actions and sat back with a grimace as the pain was slowly starting to notch back up the levels now. "Promised them I would eat a whole half of a grilled cheese sandwich for lunch if they allowed me to be a human for an extra hour, and it worked…" he trailed off although it was clear that little added burst of energy was waning down. "M'm sorry I didn't call you, Ed. I tried home first, and they said you just left so I figured you were driving here already… I had to talk to sweetness while I had the chance," he offered. "She's s'okay now; I told her I'm fine," he insisted. "Pop said she was upset… well, because..." he didn't finish as he looked up and met Eddie's eyes in sorrow with the thought of his daughter equating what had happened to him with Jayne's accident. "I hate that I did that to her… scared her again… you said I was distracted, not paying attention when this happened, but I can't remember why..."

"No, that's not what I meant; Jamie, it wasn't your fault… please don't think that, alright?" she chided softly and pulled the chair up beside him to sit down although if she was honest she would have had to admit she was a little miffed at the fact that Erin had been there doing silly things and had apparently been successful in lifting his spirits today while she was stressing on her travels and now appeared to only be bringing the same unease back to her husband. "It was an accident… let's not go there again. Kaylin and I will be fine just as soon as you are, but you really need to listen and do what you're supposed to so that you can get well and things can go back to normal before the baby comes, okay? Kaylin misses you and wants you to be at home… I need you home with us," Eddie insisted as her voice went up an octave.

"I know, m'm sorry," he reiterated again as it worried him to see her in this state, but as much as he wanted to stay awake to be with her, he was starting to tire and waiting too long would mean missing the update with any hope of comprehension for himself later. "Time's the doc coming?" he wondered as he tried to calculate when he would mentally resurface if he gave in and hit that button once more.

"Not until six," Erin answered for him. "She has another surgery this afternoon. You have plenty of time to take another nap before then," she assured. "Eddie and I can go have a bite to eat down the hall while you get some more rest… Marguerite showed me where there's a small cafeteria with coffee, fresh sandwiches, fruit and things that are brought in by a food service a few times each day."

"Is that okay?" he asked as he looked apprehensively at his obviously emotional wife who had traveled so far and only just arrived. "M'm so glad to see you, Ed, but…"

"I know, you're hurting and you want to be awake for later," Eddie conceded with a small frown as she leaned in and ruffled his hair once more. "I can see that. Take the medicine, Jamie. I've got a room at the hotel across the street… I'm not going anywhere… I'll be here all weekend through the snow. We'll listen to what Dr. Kenzie says and then talk about it later. I love you, lambchop… sleep now," she murmured as she reached over and pressed the button for him and then stayed close while he faded away from her again.

###

"C'mon, c'mon!… Damn it! OH, YOU'VE GOT TO BE FREAKING KIDDING ME!" Danny pounded on the steering wheel as he hit the brakes only to find himself trapped in Friday afternoon pre-blizzard bumper-to-bumper traffic travelling north on the New Jersey Turnpike after a glance at Eddie's fancy-shmancy GPS app that he had raved about on the way down to Washington not only showed a solid red line indicating a backup of more than five miles ahead of him now, but also an estimated arrival time of nearly four-thirty and climbing. WHY? Why hadn't he listened when the damn thing told him to get off at the previous exit? Because the road looked clear ahead and it said it would add ten minutes to his trip? God, now Linda was going to eviscerate him and hang his body upside down naked by his little toes in Times Square for all to see after this… and for what? A free tie and a stupid old computer that taunted him with a message that said 'Unfortunately there is no way for you to fix this'... SERIOUSLY?!

With a building stress headache that was now verging on a migraine, Danny picked up his new phone and speed-dialed the first number on the list before waiting for the voice to answer that he now both loved and feared. "Linda, hey honey, it's me…"

###

"He was asking for you ever since I got here," Erin revealed as she sat at a small, round cafe table and slid a tray with a cup of juice and a Napa-style chicken salad croissant sandwich with some grapes across towards Eddie. "It's three o'clock already, but I'm guessing you haven't had anything decent yet today unless Dad force fed you. You need to eat too, especially now. Jamie's not the only one you have to take care of."

"I'm sorry, what?" her distracted sister-in-law looked up and focused on the first statement. "He did… I mean he was… asking for me?"

"Of course," Erin assured as she unwrapped her own. "Eddie, even when he's completely hmm... goofy I think was the word I used with the nurse, he's totally focused on you and the baby and Kaylin. Bribery and distraction were only methods of trying to get him to relax and eat something before you got here. I don't rate like you do."

"That's not true, Jamie loves you… all of you," Eddie insisted as she looked down and picked at her meal for a few moments before continuing. "Your Dad was the only one down there that could keep him calm when he needed to be. Danny and I just sent him into a full blown anxiety attack when he woke up the first time," she admitted with deep regret.

"Oh, well don't take credit for that… you should know by now that Danny can have that effect on anyone at any time," Erin kidded before changing gears as she chewed her lip nervously, having come to her own conclusion today after viewing the extent of the damage to her little brother's leg and equating it to similar injuries she had viewed with victims in the past… ones that were forced to sue and seek prosecution after their lives had been irreparably changed by the events of mere seconds. Patrol officers obviously needed the ability to work the street first and foremost, and even with help from an amazing staff and the latest high-tech medicine, she just did not see that as a possibility for Jamie any longer. "But seriously, Eddie… Jamie is going to be looking to you in this meeting… he'll take his cue from your reaction more than anyone else's," she warned. "Dad's explained some of what he's looking at. I just think we all have to try to be really positive for him until he's ready to accept it."

"Positive… to accept _what_ exactly?" Eddie asked as her eyes narrowed and she immediately became defensive. If there was one thing she was completely not prepared to talk about or accept herself after the events and guilt of the past few days, it was the fact that some if not all of Jamie's limitations might be permanent, or possibly even get worse if Dr. Kenzie was unable to do as she professed, and that brought with it terrifying realities both professionally and personally with two children to provide for and the rest of their lives to consider. "What do you know, Erin Reagan? Did they say something to you today? Because I haven't been told we'll need to accept _anything_ yet. Jamie's goal has to be full function," she insisted. "You've all said it before… he always bounces back from things like this and he'll do it again. I know he will. Until someone tells me differently THAT'S WHAT I CHOOSE TO BELIEVE!"

"No, I just… I'm so sorry," Erin instantly backtracked as she could see the stress ratcheting back up in Eddie's demeanor and she had no wish to cause her sister-in-law or by extension her brother any more doubt when there were so many things hitting them all at once… and had she known that there was even more troubling them with concerns over the baby she would have never approached any of this alone with Eddie in the first place, especially not so soon. "I didn't mean for it to come out that way. Of course we all want him to be okay again, and I know he'll do his best and you'll move the moon if you have to to help him… we all will. It's just hard to… after seeing what it looks like now…"

"I can't do that Erin," Eddie insisted as she pushed her tray of food away. "I know everything's not okay and perfect right now, but it will be. I have to believe that."

###

"Mrs. Reagan, are you comfortable proceeding with your nerve conduction study? We really can't wait any longer for your husband to arrive… you're the last appointment of the day," Dr. Jacob's EMG technician, Marlene, advised Linda as she lay waiting an extra ten minutes alone in the exam room. "We'd like to give you a light sedative so you're relaxed and not anticipating anything. You seem a little tense and that can affect the results. There's nothing to be concerned about… we'll just have some very mild currents running through the small electrodes we already placed in your skin which will cause certain muscles to contract as they are stimulated… this shouldn't hurt at all. The doctor will be able to judge how well the nerve is working by the speed of the response and we can tell that way if there is any inflammation or impairments present. You might be slightly sore for the next few days but an ice pack and ibuprofen should be all that's necessary to relieve that."

"No, go ahead. He's obviously not going to get here in time," Linda replied tightly as she nervously spun her wedding ring on her finger and her eyes stung with repressed tears. He had promised… Danny had promised to be here with her and yet had chosen to remain in Washington longer than necessary on one of his typical wild goose chases and was now stuck in traffic in some godforsaken part of New Jersey instead of holding her hand through this.

"Alright, just let me double check the mundane paperwork one last time," the tech advised as she paged through the sheets Linda had filled out prior to being admitted for the test while comparing them to her chart. "You know how it is being a nurse… They make you ask the same question six dozen times anymore before you can go ahead with anything… always afraid of a lawsuit. Dr. Geisner has requested we check the nerve pathways for uterine function in particular so I just need to know exactly where you are in your cycle. No chance of being pregnant, right? Date of last period was the 30th?" she questioned. "That would put you at about day 10 of the next one."

"No, not pregnant," Linda replied sadly since that was the point of this entire thing. "I cycle like clockwork every 28 days… you can set a watch by it, always have."

"Well, except for last month then, right? Because according to the note she made in your chart, you would have been expected to start the 24th. So you went an extra six or seven days."

"No, I was on time," Linda insisted as she pulled out her new phone and turned to the calendar. "I have it set to mark every four weeks so I don't even have to think about it anymore. See?" she pointed. "It's the 30th."

"But the one before that was in October," the tech showed her. "That's five in between them. If you're sure you were at four weeks, you probably accidentally dragged the date down to the next line when you were swiping through… happens to me all the time now with the latest software update… I have the same kind, and I messed up my dad's birthday that way just yesterday. Did you have it over Thanksgiving?"

"I did…" Linda puzzled before her eyes flew open wide as she considered the timing of that little passionate rendezvous with Danny the night he drove down to Washington.

"So that puts you at about day 17 then," the tech continued unaware of the possible ramifications she had just exposed. "Likely three days past ovulation. Still clear? You said your husband has been out of town. It doesn't matter for the EMG, we can perform them on pregnant woman at any stage, but it would impact the recommendation for the sedative. Do you still want to proceed?"

"No, go ahead… but I'd prefer no medication, just to be safe," Linda advised as she lay back and nervously considered that serious miscalculation with her heart pounding. How had she let that happen after being spot on perfect for all these years? Had it been a simple accident like the tech suggested or rather a subconscious effort at sabotage on her part brought on by this overwhelming desire she had for another baby? What would Danny say when he found out?… He was still on the fence with this whole situation and she was certain that opinion would quickly switch to an adamant "NO WAY IN HELL!" if this nerve test revealed any danger to her health.

For the moment Linda was happy that her husband was stuck in a car in traffic somewhere else as she waited to hear the results that might impact their lives and his sense of trust in her forever.

* * *

 _Oopsie, and that's all I have to say about that. Next, Jamie and Eddie have a little time alone to start coming to grips with things before it becomes obvious to everyone else that she is not ready to accept certain truths while Linda likewise decides to hide from her own even when her husband finally manages to make it to her side._


	33. Chapter 33

Chapter 33

"Well, sleeping beauty here should be waking up soon if he sticks to his usual schedule," Erin noted as she finished paging through her magazine after she and Eddie had returned to Jamie's room a bit later on. "Why don't I give the two of you some alone time and head on out to the main lobby by the elevators. I can get my phone from security there without going through all those protocols again and give Dad a call to make sure he's going to get here on time with Gramps. He's probably getting slammed with emergency services at this point. It really looks like we're going to get hit by this storm tonight."

"Sure, and thanks for staying with him all this time, Erin," Eddie replied as she watched her sister-in-law take her leave on an unspoken mission to talk to her father about the state of things when he arrived. It was a few moments before she turned back to see that Jamie was still seemingly sleeping peacefully although it was a relief to see a more relaxed expression on his face than had been apparent in Washington. "Oh, Jamie," she sighed, suddenly feeling exhausted and wanting nothing more than to slip onto the bed to curl up with him where she felt safe and protected, but now afraid to touch any one side for fear of causing something to hurt. "What are we going to do?" she murmured as she resigned herself to sit alone in the chair instead. "I miss you…" she trailed off before a sudden commotion caught her attention in the previously quiet hallway and curiosity prevailed as she stood back up and went to the door to see what was happening.

Eddie's eyes widened and her heart fell while she watched a mid-twenty-something African American male, still unconscious and obviously brought straight from surgery as he was wheeled past and placed in the next room with numerous nurses hovering in attendance, and as much medical equipment as Jamie had surrounding him. What had her turning around to rush back towards her husband, feeling suddenly sick to her stomach and more than a little faint was the realization that the young man's left leg had been amputated in almost exactly the same place as Jamie's break was on his right. What she could not know at the time was in fact that had happened several years ago while he was on a mission in Afghanistan, and Kenzie had brought this former SEAL here specifically so that she could use her new technology to reconstruct enough of his mangled limb to enable him comfortably to wear a prosthesis after multiple botched surgeries and bone infections here in the States had left him without the ability to stand or walk on his own. Instead, Eddie saw only what she feared was the ghost of Christmas yet-to-come… a failure on the doctor's part for another guinea pig in her precious study which was upsetting enough to send her into the bathroom to lose what meager food she had taken in that afternoon. _Just who the hell was it again that she had agreed to trust her husband's life to?_ she wondered as all those doubts came rushing back in a crushing mass.

"Ed… Eddie?" came a raspy concerned voice from the bed. "Is that you? Honey, what's wrong? Ow… damn it!" came the grimacing cry and curse as she could tell he was struggling to move in an automatic effort to get to her.

"Oh… I'm sorry; it's nothing, Jamie, please don't worry… stay still. I'm fine," she lied, not wanting to explain in a million years what had caused her to feel ill. "Just give me a minute," she begged before hurriedly rinsing her mouth and splashing cold water on her face at the sink prior to going out in the room to check on him. "Hey, no… don't do that. I'm okay," she assured once more as she leaned in for a hug. "The organic chicken salad and grapes Erin bought me for lunch just did me in… too healthy I guess. Munchie must be in the mood for a bacon double cheeseburger tonight."

"Ed…" he warned as he lay back, relieved to see the smile on her face, even if it was obviously forced. "You're a terrible liar, and you say I have no poker face… you're upset again," he concluded, and for the first time in this Eddie saw tears come to his eyes that were not the result of physical pain. "I'm sorry… I'm so sorry for putting you through this," he whispered. "I don't know why I screwed everything up for us... can't believe I was so stupid to walk out in front of a car like that."

"No Jamie… that's not what happened. Rick said he thinks it went through the light from what he heard and there were no skid marks… whoever did this was speeding or drunk and ran away. This is not your fault," she emphasized. "It was an accident and I love you and we'll get through this… all of us. Now please," she begged as she reached down and kissed the side of his head and leaned against him. "Please don't ever blame yourself again," she added as she wiped his tears even as she was doing the same… still unable to bring the words out that told him it was in fact her fault… she was the one that had distracted him as he was crossing the street. But for that he might have made it safely and right now would have been home with her, sitting in their beautiful house in Bay Ridge, maybe with a log crackling in the fireplace as they waited to be snowed in for the weekend with a psychedelic Christmas tree, an excitable three-year-old, a big black cat and a precious unborn baby between them.

"I want... to go home... I miss… us… hate this..." he choked out as he echoed her thoughts while the privacy Erin had knowingly afforded them allowed some of the bottled up emotion to escape from both as they started to come to terms with this as a couple even though it was quickly apparent that it was too much for the moment. "It hurts, Ed… it hurts to breathe right now..."

"I know, shh, lambchop," she agreed softly, still pressed up against him; their tears now mingling together. "You can't get so upset, please… you have to try to relax or something will beep and they'll come in soon and make you take those meds again. They watch you like a hawk here… that nurse has been in like every ten minutes. Listen, in just a little while we'll find out what's going on this week, and then we'll know when that will happen, I promise. Dr. Kenzie said you will have the two surgeries you need by Thursday and then that big metal thing will be off and your side and your ribs will probably feel better by then, okay? Maybe a few days after that? I want you home too. We have to be together… the holidays are coming… Kaylin and munchie need their daddy, and I need my husband with me. I love you, Jamison Reagan, and we're going to get through this together. I'm so sorry this happened to you, baby, but I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere."

###

"I'm here; I'm here," Danny announced sounding out of breath after running up four flights of stairs as he was ushered back to the room where Linda's exam had just wrapped up and she was resting back on the table for a few minutes after having redressed, waiting for the tech to forward the results to the doctor in his office so they could go there and speak to him. "I'm so sorry this happened, babe, but I'm here right now and I'm not going anywhere," he assured as he pulled a stool with him and slid over to grab her hand. "Damn traffic, there was an accident. I wanted to be on time. What happened, Lin?" he asked as his heart dropped when he noted her tight, pained expression as she avoided his eyes and just shook her head. "How did it go? What's wrong?"

"Your wife is experiencing some discomfort from muscle spasms in her lower back brought on by the stimulation," the tech with a name tag reading Marlene answered for her. "This almost never happens, but usually resolves itself pretty quickly. Linda, are you sure I can't get you anything? Dr. Jacobs will prescribe a relaxant to help you if this continues. You really look like you need it and you should take it easy for the next few days. Definitely call off your shifts in the ER over the weekend and stay off your feet. Ice and ibuprofen at the very least. Let your husband and the boys pamper you for a change."

"No… no drugs, thanks Marlene," Linda sniffed with a thick voice as she wiped the corner of her eye. "Can you… can you give us a minute alone now?" she asked.

"Sure, the doctor needs about twenty to review the data before he's ready for you, anyway. You can stay in here and relax. I'll come get you when he's ready," she assured before taking her leave and knowingly pulling the door closed behind her.

"Linda, what's going on? What happened?" Danny demanded. "God, I'm so sorry. I left almost on time and then that thing with Eddie's car… I didn't want to wait, but then the guy was trying to convince me someone had messed with it and it could have caught on fire… and then there was all kinds of traffic on the turnpike and a rollover and I didn't listen to the damn GPS…"

"Danny, stop… just stop," Linda begged as the tears finally ran over. "For once I don't want to hear it. I needed you here today for me… you knew that, and you chose to stay down there in Washington anyway because something else was more important to you. Your brother… a case… it's always something else. Having another baby or being here for me… it didn't mean enough to you."

"That's not true," he insisted with a deep sigh. "I wanted to be here. I left, but I had to try this morning, Lin… I had to try to get whatever evidence I could to find this guy before it all disappeared. He's my brother and that detective down there, he just gave up on the case. Whatever happened to Jamie meant nothing to him."

"And how do you think I feel right now?" she challenged with her blue eyes flashing intensely. "Like I mean everything to you?"

"No, probably not," Danny admitted with regret and shame although he could tell now obviously it wasn't good news at this point. "But you do… you do mean everything to me," he insisted as he slid over closer. "It's my job to make sure you know that, and I'm sorry I screwed up again today… but what happened in the test, Lin? Honey, please… I want to know. Why does your back hurt now? That wasn't supposed to happen, was it? They were just running simple non-invasive tests on your nerves, that's what you said, right?"

"They did… it wasn't… I don't know… When they started it was fine, and then they did a second step and put some needles in the muscle near where the bullet was to measure the contraction and I just started getting the spasms," Linda answered with sorrow and frustration. "It shouldn't have done that… and then we had to stop because it got worse."

"Okay, but then why wouldn't you take something for it, huh? That nurse said they could give you some meds to help."

"I can't because I might be…" she choked back the answer. "I mean I don't know… I guess I wanted to finish the test and hear the results because we waited so long for this, and then I thought I had to drive home myself," she suddenly decided to cover herself with the only believable excuse she could come up with on such short notice since Danny was starting to get that look on his face… the one that told her this was going to turn into that ultimatum conversation she didn't want to hear, and if he knew… if he knew right now that there was a possibility, even if it was slight... it would end up being something a lot worse.

"Okay, okay… well, now I am here and you don't have to do that," he assured as he carried on with the facts he had before him. "But after we meet with this doctor and hear what he has to say you're going to get a script from him, and I will go down to the pharmacy myself and have it filled before I take you home. You're in pain Linda... honey, I can't stand to see that. Your car can stay here in the garage over the weekend, alright?"

"Danny, this didn't go how I wanted it to today," Linda cried openly now as he pulled her head into his shoulder.

"I know it didn't babe, but things don't always work out the way we want them to."

###

"I take it things didn't work out down there," Erin noted as her father got off the elevator on Jamie's floor after a delay accompanied only by Detective Nucifero as a single bodyguard. "Where's Grandpa?"

"Waiting in the lobby," Frank revealed with a heavy, deep nose breath as he considered the temperature of the conversation that was likely to be had on the ride home since Henry had not been allowed to go up to the floor after a thermal scan had revealed a possible slight fever. "Denied access," he explained simply. "He insisted he's fine, but if he wasn't hot before he sure is now."

"I bet that went over well."

"It did not," Frank admitted with a shake of his head at his father's frustration. "And that would be an understatement. He was determined to come and see his grandson. Eva is staying with Kaylin at the house for now," he explained. "She flew in this afternoon."

"I know, Eddie told me, and Danny?" Erin asked. "Should we wait for him?"

"He's with Linda," her father revealed as he frowned once more and looked at his daughter. This week had not been a good one medically for the Reagan family as a whole from the very youngest unborn member upwards. "Talked to him briefly just before we got here, but he said things didn't go well today at the neurologist… he did not elaborate except to say she'll be okay, but she's not feeling well now. He took her home… that's where he needs to be. We'll discuss that later. Now tell me why you are out here waiting for me. What is it? What's wrong?"

"I don't think Eddie is handling this the way she needs to at all," Erin cut immediately to the chase and reported her concerns since their time was now limited as a glance at her watch showed it to be five minutes before the scheduled start of the meeting. "And it's affecting Jamie. When I sat with him, the nurse said he was doing fine… he used his pump, ate a little and got some rest, but after she got here, he was afraid to take his pain meds until I promised to get her out of the room for something to eat. He's more worried about her than he is himself right now. When I tried to talk to her about, you know, being more positive around him... especially in this meeting she just got upset and pushed everything away before saying she believes it's all going to be fine. She's putting her head in the sand and refuses to accept… you know, the reality of it. We need to do something."

"To what end, Erin?" Frank asked as he motioned to Nucifero to step aside so they had some privacy.

"To what end? To make sure that Jamie is taken care of properly, and that he knows no matter what happens he'll be able to do that for himself even if he's not on the street anymore; that he has other options like that position Chuck Miller offered him in legal… to _that_ end!" she hissed with a nervous look over her shoulder to make sure they weren't being overheard and then a deliberate frown at her father's expected reticent look at the mention of the job at 1PP. "I'm serious, Dad," she asserted with her eyes flashing. "He's my little brother, your son… I don't care how it looks for once; he needs it and deserves our help too. I mean his leg… have you seen?…" she choked off and looked away. "I stayed in the room while the nurse took the wrap off, Dad… it's not good."

"I know," her father admitted in a low voice as he sought to push anymore of that discussion away for now. "But that's for later once we know what he's facing. Jamie and Eddie… they've had a lot to contend with this week," he revealed. "It's not just this, sweetheart," he added and Erin looked up in surprise as she quickly put that together with the fact they had been at Dr. Geisner for their ultrasound. "He has reason to be concerned about her too."

"Dad, what exactly are you saying?" she demanded before dropping her shoulders and closing her eyes. Surely there couldn't be more. No wonder why Jamie was so focused on his wife, even in his current condition. "Something's wrong with her? Or no... oh, God, not the baby..." she trailed off as his troubled look was answer enough. "It is, isn't it?"

"There's a possibility, although the odds are in their favor, but I'm not at liberty to speak for them," he conceded. "Eddie was very positive about that situation before Jamie's trip, but now with everything else heaped upon her… Erin, I think it's too much for her to handle all at once right now. We need to give them some space and let them make their own choices together. It's only been a few days, and she's had to make very serious decisions on faith while being held apart from him for so much of that time. Let's see what happens after the meeting. Jamie will get his head on straight about this after he knows what he's facing, and he's able to think clearly again. They need to come to terms with it without being forced. It's our place to support them, so that's what we're going in there to do."

* * *

 _So, definitely not a good time for the entire Reagan family as Frank admitted, but despite his resolve, he won't be able to keep his opinions out of the upcoming meeting with Dr. Kenzie when it becomes apparent some fatherly input is needed to fend off a stubborn impasse between interested parties. Unfortunately he can't be in two places at once as Linda and Danny have their own discussion over what comes next, but perhaps not all the facts will be revealed there either just yet._


	34. Chapter 34

Chapter 34

"Hello, everyone," Kenzie smiled as Eddie, Frank and Erin stood while she walked in the room at precisely six o'clock after first pausing to check on her other patient in the adjoining room who was still asleep. "Are we all present?" she asked while looking around and noting Danny's absence before Frank gave her an affirming nod. "Good. I'm glad we could do this today with the weather coming in tonight. I know the past couple of days have been a blur with everything that's happened so I wanted to have this talk and get everyone on the same page including our star patient here... Jamie, it's a pleasure to see those hazel orbits open and more or less focused for once. Marguerite and the other nurses gave you passing grades on compliance for today which is a definite improvement," she added with some satisfaction. "Although I'm guessing we're pushing limits on that for you right now," she observed, noting his tight, pained look even as she performed a cursory exam.

"I'm fine, let's just get on with it then," he replied as he gripped his wife's hand harder. Honestly he'd been feeling increasingly uncomfortable over the last half-hour, but there was no way he intended not to have input here. "I want to know what's happening first."

"Of course, so let's cut to the very basic chase. As I mentioned before, this study is proprietary so I cannot reveal details, but in a nutshell what will take place this week barring any complications..." she trailed off even as she pulled the gown away from his chest to listen to his heart and noted a minor petechial rash developing while as Eddie's eyes widened; she had been keeping a close watch for that and hadn't noticed it herself earlier.

"Is that what I think... I mean I checked a hundred times, and I swear it wasn't there before!" she stammered an interruption. "What did you call it? Something embolism syndrome?"

"It is," Kenzie affirmed as she noted it on the chart. "But it's not unexpected, as I told you a large percentage of patients with long bone fractures develop it, up to 90 percent. The rash is usually last to appear in the triad including pulmonary and cerebral changes. Jamie has been displaying some of these all along but his clinical presentation has been very mild and we've been treating him appropriately. That's another reason why it was so important to me to get him transferred here quickly when it became apparent the staff at that hospital in Washington was… well, lacking for use of a better word."

"So he's had it all along and you didn't bother to tell us?!" Eddie gasped.

"Ed, honey, please relax," Jamie interrupted as he tried to understand, although it was clear he was being forced to speak slowly and deliberately as both his mind and body demanded at this time. "Let me hear this out. It's what?"

"Fat embolism… most commonly associated with long bone and pelvic trauma followed by orthopedic surgery, particularly with multiple traumatic injuries," Kenzie explained. "So you hit the real trifecta here. The most popular theory about the etiology of fat embolism is that globules called emboli are released by the disruption of fat cells in fractured bone and enter through ruptures in marrow vascular beds. There are other possibilities, but regardless of the source, increased fatty acid levels have a toxic effect on the capillary-alveolar membrane in the lung and on capillary beds in the cerebral circulation… lung and brain," she simplified. "It can also show up as a rash on the chest and neck or in the eyes."

"But that other doctor in Washington said that's why he wanted to amp…" Eddie flinched and pursed her lips shut to stop herself from saying the word out loud in front of her husband.

"In its worst form, it can be deadly," Kenzie admitted bluntly before continuing. "The most significant feature of FES is the potentially severe respiratory effects. This is not that," she assured. "And we are constantly monitoring everything from his heart rate, oxygen levels to renal output to make sure to the best of our abilities it doesn't turn into that… but what we need do at this point is move forward and get you on the mend which brings us back to the schedule this week," she reiterated. "As things stand, tomorrow morning you will have a very detailed scan on your left leg which will be used to reconstruct the bone on the right, and Monday late-afternoonish I'll be taking you back to the OR for the bone graft harvest," she explained. "We'll take some material from your anterior iliac crest here in you right hip and infuse it into the biodegradable matrix that will be used in the femur fracture repair on Thursday. That's a much longer surgery and I'll be replacing that exterior metal mess that turns everyone's stomachs with an interior rod to support the bone just like was already done for your tibia… the shinbone," she added while pointing to it.

"Wait, so I broke that too?" Jamie puzzled as a lot of what she was saying was clearly going over his head in the state he was in, but he was still trying to hang with it. "But I don't remember that hurting before. Why not?"

"Well, partly because it was already stabilized by the point where the block you remember wore off, and our brains tend to focus on the biggest and closest owies to them first, namely your femur," Kenzie replied before taking a deep breath admitting a truth that was honestly still troubling her as well. "But two of the major nerves that run down to the lower leg pass through the fracture sites and were also possibly damaged… to what extent we won't know until some of the swelling comes down and the block is removed from your leg… that's not something I recommend we try again at this point for kicks though."

"But so that could be... permanent?" Jamie asked the question no one else wanted to know as his eyes flashed nervously around the room picking up the strained faces on everyone else as one of those big realizations hit him squarely and he sank back against the bed while his mind whirled with those possibilities. "Oh, God…"

"Jamie… it also might _not_ be," Eddie insisted as she squeezed his hand harder and looked up at Kenzie with a huff. " _Right?_ That was the point of all this? Of risking his life so he could keep his leg and actually use it?!"

"Edit," Frank warned as he sensed her temper was short.

"In my judgement during the initial surgery…" Kenzie trailed off and picked her phrasing carefully as she reconsidered that conversation she had with herself at the time and then later with Rick before she added with conviction. "I believed it was in Jamie's best interest to try the repair, but there are no guarantees."

 _Jamie's best interest, or yours I wonder,_ was the thought that crossed Eddie's mind but she did not dare try to say it aloud at that time as her throat closed tightly.

"So when would we know," Erin asked as she was the only one capable of carrying on the conversation at that point. "I mean… what is and what's not…"

"Within 48 hours after Thursday's surgery, if it goes well… we'll begin to wean him off the block and begin rehab procedures," Kenzie explained. "For a period of time that will have to be more passive than active. Normally for patients with an intramedullary nail… the interior rod I mentioned that will be placed, we try to get them up and weight bearing as soon as possible because the outcomes are generally better, but for Jamie I'm afraid that will not be the case. In addition to the leg fractures he's had that severe injury to his spleen that we must be very careful of for the next four weeks or so… his immune system will be down so infection control is a priority, plus there can be no risks of inadvertent blows or falls in that time. Those multiple broken ribs and severe bruising to his left arm and side that will prevent him from being able reliably to use crutches or another walking device for quite a while… He'll be restricted to a bed or wheelchair here until then except when the therapists have him laid out on a mat in the gym... so at first he'll stay in the general ward once he's released from the surgical wing and then afterwards in one of the transitional units down the hall for inpatient rehab."

"Here?" Jamie croaked out as he tried to take all this in. "I have to stay here?" he repeated as he caught Eddie's frightened eyes once more and that anxious feeling started to settle in again and an obvious rise in his heart and respiratory rate was quickly noted. "All that time? You're talking months, right?… I can't go home?"

"Jamie, the integrity of the study is very important," Dr. Kenzie tried calmly to explain. "One of the required protocols is not to release a patient while there is an inherent risk of infection. Now with some of the other subjects, that period is a matter of a week or so, but with you… you have an impaired spleen on top of an open fracture that was grossly contaminated. This is the very best place for you to recover, I assure you. Even if you had been treated more conventionally in a regular surgical setting, you would have been placed on IV antibiotics for an extended period, and your injuries will require daily medical attention for some time. It's not feasible to try to do all of that outside of a setting like this, and in this instance it must be performed by someone approved and on my staff. Anything done elsewhere would invalidate you for the study. Your medical needs must be met here, and that includes an agreement not to have any other imaging done at another facility."

"He's my husband, _not_ a subject!" Eddie managed to express her growing ire this time. "Stop acting like he doesn't have feelings! His own grandfather wasn't allowed in to see him tonight, and they wanted to deny me because my temperature was like half a degree higher than normal until I told them I was pregnant so I got an exception! Plus he's a father; he needs to be with his daughter, too!" she insisted as her voice continued to notch up.

"Alright, everyone, let's take a breath here," Frank advised as he sought to take a bit of control and reintroduce some reason before his daughter-in-law self combusted. "First and foremost is Jamie's health, and we will all do whatever is necessary to ensure that," he added in his deep no-nonsense tone. "Including accepting the fact that there are going to have to be concessions made by everyone."

"But, Dad…" came the expected protest from his son.

"Whatever is necessary, Jamison," his father repeated firmly.

"Well, I am _not_ staying here for months," Jamie continued stubbornly anyway, in no mood to have others making such decisions over his life as Frank had suspected, still old habits died hard and his father found it impossible to distance himself completely. "My wife and daughter need me at home," he insisted even as he grimaced while trying to push himself up further on the bed to make his point. "You said other people get released in a week or so. We're in the same city, so can't I just come here and get it done outpatient?"

"You're talking about adding in excess of two or three hours of travel time to your day on top of what would be required here," Kenzie quickly calculated given what she knew from what Rick had told her about where the Reagans lived. "Not possible. There's no way you could handle that at any point soon, and your injury is limiting… you will need physical help just getting around for some time and the care has to be specialized down to the way you sleep. Respiratory therapy is required while you are immobile… steps are out of the question for the reasons I listed above for your spleen," she listed. "And that's just the tip of the iceberg."

"I find in cases like this compromise is the best solution," Frank offered diplomatically as he sensed they were at an impasse between his stubborn son who was only focused on his family to the detriment of his own comfort and health, a daughter-in-law that was still running on adrenaline and pure emotion without stopping to think clearly, and an equally strong-willed doctor who he knew, even with a short relationship to base his opinion on, was only focused on her study although with an honest interest in providing Jamie with the best possible care. "Everyone has a lot on their plates this week with the surgeries, and we're agreed that there is no possibility that he can go anywhere either before or directly after that, right? What if we step back and consider some alternatives in the meantime?"

"Alternatives like what?" Eddie sniffed as she wiped her eyes. "Like him missing Christmas with Kaylin? Like him staying here all alone without us?"

"Like seeing what can be done for some short-term leaves so we can mitigate part of that," Frank offered. "Jamie's sister-in-law, Linda… Danny's wife, is a very experienced ER nurse at St. Victor's and we have a close family friend who not only is an excellent RT; she also knows how to handle this one when he balks at his therapy," he explained with a nod to his son and a reference of course to the bubbly but relentless Addison Greene who had seen Jamie through that previous pneumonia scare when all of this had first started so long ago. "Would it be possible for them to perform some of the IV therapy and medical treatments he'll require when things are a little further along? Perhaps then he can stay at home a few days a week… or better yet over the weekends when your rehabilitation staff is likely not on duty if this runs like any other hospital I've ever seen. I think it would be good for everyone's moral," he noted as he saw Kenzie step back and consider the suggestion as he hoped she would. "Eddie, through all this we can't forget that you have work commitments and you are in fact pregnant. You only have so much leave available and some of that has to be saved for when the baby comes, right? Now the rest of the family will step up to help out in any way we can, but you most certainly cannot do this alone, and Jamie obviously cannot be left without help until he's able to get around by himself. We need to limit the stress on the both of you as well. What would it take, Doctor?" he questioned as he turned back to her. "To implement something like that?"

"Well, it's not possible until at least a week after the last surgery and I would have to get approval from my director," Kenzie admitted as she considered it. "I'd need to meet with Linda and your RT to assess their capabilities if he allows it. I'm sure they would be required to sign non-disclosure documents, plus certain conditions would have to be met in the home… again if there are steps, plus access for a wheelchair… an adjustable bed would help."

"Now, see… all of those things can be looked into while Dr. Kenzie moves forward with what needs to be done here this week," Frank nodded as his intention to get everyone on the same page was taking shape. "Their house has an open floor plan, a bathroom on the lower level and we can rent such a bed and put it in the dining room… it's worked before," he admitted as he thought back to the months his own mother convalesced in her home after her initial heart attack. "What do you say to that plan, Jamie? Eddie?"

"I think you need to listen to Dad," Erin encouraged as she saw the value in her father's suggestions as he guided the couple in a good direction while still giving them the control. "He's right, there needs to be a balance."

"I don't know," Eddie answered with a tearful frowny-faced look towards her husband. While the thought of them being apart so much still tore at her heart, to be honest she had not been able to come up with a better idea on her own. "It's not perfect," she confessed.

"No, but it's a start," he conceded with a still-heavy heart as the thought of relying on so many people just for the simple pleasure of staying in his own home to see his daughter for a night or allowing his wife to continue her career while his was apparently already tanked was demoralizing and he put his head back and closed his eyes.

###

"So has it starting to feel better yet?" Danny asked even as his wife flinched when he sat down on the floor with a beer in his hand and leaned back on the couch cushion next to where she was laying. "I take that as a no," he frowned. "Are you sure you don't want me to help you up to bed? I mean shouldn't that pill have kicked in by now? You took it more than an hour ago. It's a good thing the boys are staying up the street at Ginny's house tonight so it will be quiet. Maybe a warm bath later will help. More ice?" he continued pulling at straws.

"No, it's _not_ better Danny," Linda sniffed clutched a pillow and dabbed her eyes, unwilling to tell him now that she had merely pretended to take the pill before flushing it away in the bathroom while he went to pull the car around. "It's not going to be better."

"Yes, it is Linda," he tried to assure while making a concerted effort to remain sensitive with what he knew was news that had disappointed her to the very core. "Honey, I know you're hurting now… more in your heart than even this thing with your back, but it's better that we know now, right? If this had happened the other way… if you had gotten pregnant and been in this much pain, then what?" he asked and failed to note as all the blood drained out of her face. "Dr. Jacobs said you already have inflammation and irritating that nerve with pressure is obviously a bad idea. He doesn't even want to tackle taking the bullet out because he said it's the scar tissue that's already there causing the problem and doing that might only make it worse."

"I heard what he said, Daniel Reagan, I just don't know what to do about it right now," she continued to cry as reality settled down with the added pain in her heart of knowing she was deceiving him about something desperately intimate to their relationship while speaking the truth in words only. There was no way now that she was willing to come clean with what had happened… not unless absolutely necessary, and the earliest that could be known would be… well, five days from now she determined as she did the mental math… six days sooner than your missed period, the popular advertisement in just about every woman's magazine proclaimed with the bright pink box.

"I know… we'll talk about that later when you feel up to it, okay? But for starters, you're going to take it easy this weekend like that nurse told you, and I'm not going anywhere," he assured although he had every intention on making sure the evidence he brought home from Washington including that computer fell in the right hands as soon as possible. "Baez took care of our hot open cases the past few days so I'm staying away from the squad," he declared. "We'll get takeout from your favorite Italian place up the street tonight and sit here and watch the snow fall together and then call the boys back home tomorrow to shovel it when it's done… that and drink a lot of beer," he declared as he finished knocking one back. "You want one?" He tried before catching a look that told him in no uncertain terms what the answer to that question was.

"Danny!" came the strangled sob.

"Right, not with the medication… sorry," he recalled. "The pharmacist at the desk made me listen to that whole spiel before I could sign your prescription out. Maybe you should have skipped that and gone straight for the scotch instead for all the good it's doing you," he griped as he dropped his head back and closed his eyes. "I know I could use something with a good kick in it after the last few days... can't believe there's nothing here in the house but a six-pack. I'm gonna have to pick some up when I run out for the food. Pretty sure Pop, Dad and Erin could use a good belt by now, too," he admitted as he looked up at the clock and noted the time. "Wonder how things went with Jamie?"

###

"I think you should go to sleep now," Eddie murmured after they had been alone for a while again once Frank and Erin departed just a bit after Kenzie had taken her own leave with promises of visiting as soon as the storm allowed. "You look tired," she observed as he had grown increasingly quiet over the last hour as the roadmap for the next week and beyond was finalized. "Take your meds."

"Not until you promise to go back to the hotel and stay there for the night," he replied as he stared straight ahead, still contemplating what had been said earlier. For whatever reason the reality of permanent damage had just settled on him… maybe it was the clarity of the fog lifting for just long enough, but it was there now and he had the feeling that it wouldn't go away ever again no matter what kind of drugs flooded his brain. "You need your rest too, Ed. Take care of yourself and the baby, please… do that for me since I can't do that for you anymore."

"Jamie, don't… don't even go there… please. I know it in my heart you are going to be okay just like I know our baby is. I need you, and Kaylin needs you, and this baby needs you… no one else. You are going to get through this and be fine. I want you to believe that," she pleaded even as she saw that light had gone out in his eyes.

"Then do things for you and for them… that's what I want. You heard... this is my life for now, and I don't want it to turn into yours too. Work your shift on Monday and make sure Kaylin gets to school if they have it. Dad was right, you can't waste all your time and energy sitting here… you need to be a mom and a cop, not my babysitter."

"Jamie, it's not a waste of anything to be with my husband and like you would ever do that if the tables were turned," she insisted and then watched with regret as he flinched at that thought. "You just need some rest. We'll talk some more tomorrow, but I'm not going anywhere," she insisted. "Well, I mean I am going to the hotel, but only because they're kicking me out so I have to leave now… figures, right?… I think I get an armed escort and end up on some kind of do not enter list if I try to stay," she admitted and then immediately wondered how Rick had been granted such a reprieve before answering that question herself when she considered who he was apparently involved with now. "I'll be back after nine in morning, okay? Now please take your meds."

"Only if... after you get into your room, can you call the phone here and let it ring one time?… You know how we do that sometimes when it's late just to let each other know we're okay and home safe… please, Ed? I need to hear that tonight."

"Of course I'll do that for you," she promised and sealed the deal with a kiss before doing as he asked. It was just a few minutes later when a single chime came over the speaker on the hand-held control and Jamie relented with a tired half-smile as he dutifully pushed that button once more. Before he could catch himself from drifting away though he swore he could hear a deep soulful baritone voice singing a familiar tune down the hall.

 _Let her cry, if the tears fall down like rain  
Let her sing, if it eases all her pain  
Let her go, let her walk right out on me  
And if the sun comes up tomorrow  
Let her be, oh, let her be._

* * *

 _So, hopefully everyone gets the reference to Darius Rucker of Hootie & the Blowfish fame there at the end with the chorus from "Let Her Cry". For whatever reason a young version of him is the deep voice I hear whenever I write for a new expressive OC character, Quincy, who wound up just down the hall from Jamie, and will fast become a new good friend and lifeline to get our hero through the next stage of this story as the reality of his situation sinks in while Danny is still kept in the dark over Linda's potential bombshell._

 _Next up, a few more discussions are held between other members of the family including Henry and Eva who rejoin us as they consider the events that have just occurred and what to do about them as a certain three-year-old offers up a temper tantrum while back at the hospital Jamie is shocked to recognize a familiar face alone in the elevator with him once more._


	35. Chapter 35

Chapter 35

"So how's he doing… really?" Danny fretted over the speaker as the nucleus of the Reagan family minus one held a conference call from the back of the Commissioner's SUV as it pulled away from the Columbia Medical Center campus and headed south towards Brooklyn with Frank, Henry and Erin reluctantly on board. "I wish I could have been there, but Linda…"

"He's adjusting… they both are," Frank interrupted thoughtfully as he considered the whole of the discussion that had been held in Jamie's hospital room with Dr. Kenzie.

"I think it's a real stretch to say that, Dad," Erin disagreed with a roll of the eyes and a frustrated shake of the head. "You should have let me stay too," she insisted while crossing her arms defensively. "He needs _us._ Jamie was obviously trying to process this… as much as he could anyway, but all Eddie wanted to do was cry and argue with the doctor. I told her earlier that he was going to look to her and take his cue from her reaction and that's exactly what happened. She's making him panic because she's so upset and you could see he was just getting more confused and shutting down the longer it went."

"Sweetheart, they both need to process this… she's scared, and he was getting tired and hurting, Erin, that's why I thought it best we back away," Frank explained. "It's going to take a while for this all to sink in and the two of them needed some more time alone together before visiting hours were over. Dr. Kenzie and the nurses assured me they would see to it that he took his medication if needed and got rest tonight."

"Then I should have stayed with Eddie," Henry griped, equally displeased to have made the long trip up there only to be told that he was being forced away from his granddaughter-in-law as well. "Francis, I know how to settle the girl… I could have helped her figure this out and calmed her down… there's more to all this. We shouldn't have left her alone; she needs us too."

"I know and I offered that, but she was too afraid you were getting sick, and that if you passed it to her, she wouldn't be able to see Jamie either so she said no. The idea of all this security and being kept away from him again is so unsettling it was making things worse the more I tried to reason with her. I'm not sure what's behind it entirely, but he told me after her appointment the day before we left that he wanted to stay home and be with her, but that she insisted he go on the trip… that she wanted everything to be normal until they heard differently about the baby's issue. I think she's blaming herself, and then the fact that she was on the phone with him when it happened, plus everything at the hospital…" he trailed off sadly. "Pop, you should give her a call tonight once she's back at the hotel and see if you can do something that way. This week is going to be difficult," he added. "They've scheduled the surgeries for late Monday afternoon and starting around ten o'clock on Thursday… that one could run five to six hours because Dr. Kenzie's going to have a neurosurgery consult at the same time to see what if anything can be done about the nerve damage."

"Well, you better make sure she doesn't get Linda's guy," Danny added in disgust as he kept his voice low from the bedroom upstairs so his wife could not hear him above the television. "She's flat on the couch with muscle spasms in her back after a test they promised would be nothing," he revealed. "Now she's gotta be off her feet all weekend and the painkillers he gave her aren't even working… She's upset about the whole thing and I have to stay here until she's better; she can't even get up by herself right now. I don't know when I'll be able to get up there to see him," he worried. "Maybe when the boys are back on Sunday. Plus I need to get that… um, stuff I picked up in DC over to Mike, right?"

"Heh, just wait until you try to get into this place," Henry moped, still unhappy about being denied access to his grandson or being unable offer any input into this plan especially considering the fact that it was unlikely he'd be able to return any time soon due to the weather. "Slight fever, my ass. I feel fine."

"Danny, just take care of your wife," Frank advised as he ignored yet another grumpy barb hurled by his father. "Mike won't be in the forensics lab until Monday at the earliest. Eddie is staying at the hotel across from the hospital over the weekend and I am bunking in the ready room at 1PP until the storm is over. That way I can keep on top of things and I'm closer in case something happens. Erin will be at home with Nicki in Park Slope and Pop's going back to Bay Ridge."

"I'm going to the kid's place, not our house," Henry insisted since his older great-granddaughter had returned to campus to take a test that afternoon. "I don't want to leave Eva stranded there alone with my sweetie-pie and the cat all weekend through the storm," he added in an effort to feel useful. "I can cook meals for the freezer to make things easier while he's away… I have to feel like I'm doing _something_ for them."

"We're all going to have to do something before he can come home," Frank advised. "The house is going to require some modifications, Kaylin will need care… I think it's important to try to keep her on a familiar schedule while Jamie's away and Eddie is preoccupied."

"Well, Danny… since you mentioned it already, and she really responded to you the other night… maybe you can keep her soccer practices going if none of the other team parents offer?" Erin wondered. "I mean Jamie says they just get together once a week to let the kids kick the ball around and play together at that indoor place, but she really loves it."

"I'll do that," he promised. "Tuesday nights. Jack and Sean can come and help out too."

"When she's up to it and if she's willing, Linda will need to meet with Dr. Kenzie," Frank added as he addressed Danny once more while the car rolled through the city on a determined course towards their first stop at 1PP. "Once he's allowed home over the weekends Jamie will need her to provide some daily IV antibiotic and wound treatments, but she needs to have approval from the director of the study first… the same with Addie Greene; I'll speak to George about it Monday. Otherwise your brother will have to stay at Columbia for the foreseeable future, and given what we saw tonight, that is not a good option."

"No, I'm sure Linda will want to help," Danny offered out loud even while he considered the renewed tension that might come between her and Eddie once more given the devastating news they had received from the neurosurgeon regarding any potential pregnancy. "She's just… hurting... it's tough right now," he explained vaguely, not wanting to bring the real reason for Linda's heartache and pain up in front of Henry and Erin who were still in the dark over the true issue. "I need to ask her when she's feeling better…" he trailed off.

"Understood, Dan," his father replied. "Tell her we're all thinking about her too. I know this is a hard time…"

"She'll be fine," Danny insisted as he sought to move on and assure himself. "We knew there was a chance something might… I just didn't figure it would be like this… we'll talk about it later," he ended that segment of the conversation abruptly before it got more personal. "Let's just get back to Jamie. What else needs to happen before we bring him home?"

"Right," Frank continued knowingly while making a mental note to attend to his oldest son and his wife privately later. "Pop, while you're there at the house, why don't you make a list of things that need to be done so we can start on them. Jamie won't be able to use the steps for a while, so he'll need access to get inside, provisions for the bathroom, kitchen… a bed… things like that, you'll know the best way to set it up since Mom stayed downstairs for a while before..." he stopped when he saw Henry take a heavy swallow and look down at the floor as he relived a time of personal tragedy when his wife passed away after convalescing at home for several months after an initial heart attack. "I'm sorry... I know it will be hard to see it like that again."

"Nonsense, Francis," his father pushed it away with a grim look. "It's where your mother wanted to be at that time… and it has to be done now for my grandson because that's what he needs. We found the dining room was best since the doors are wider than the den and it was easier for her to maneuver in there while giving her some privacy."

"Gramps, I'll help too if you want," Erin assured as she leaned over to hug him. "Nicki and I can be there as soon as the streets are clear. The doctor told us that Jamie can't come home for at least another week and a half. We have time."

"Well, let's not forget that Eva is part of this now too, and from what she told us when she got here, she's supposedly staying at the house until she finds one of her own," Henry advised with a huff at that thought. "Hopefully that doesn't set Eddie off too; she forgot completely about her mother coming because she was so focused on what's happened. I'm sure that woman will want to have some input, considering…"

"We are all going to pitch in and learn how to adjust to make the best of this situation," Frank insisted as he promised to see to it himself that his son's new mother-in-law was not a detriment if necessary. "I'll speak to Eva if that becomes an issue and make the calls to order the equipment if you just tell me what they need," he offered as he watched Henry nod in agreement as their plan to tackle this on all fronts came together. "We'll do this as a family."

###

"Mommy! There snow! _LOOK!"_ Kaylin shouted as she jumped excitedly on top of her parents' bed in the usual fashion the following morning just hours after the heaviest part of the storm had settled over the city and was now dumping several inches per hour in its wake at a pace expected to continue well into the next day… the little girl temporarily forgetting the circumstances of the week before catching herself in a mistake as a startled Eva threw back the covers.

"KAYLIN ELIZABETH!" her grandmother gasped loudly with a hand over her heart. "You mustn't _do_ that!" she scolded before sitting up. "You frightened me!"

"M'm sorry, Nagyanya!" the little girl cried as she scrambled off the bed while her light blue eyes brimmed and she looked around frantically, confused as to why Eva was shouting at her or more so why she was there and not in her own room down the hall, having happily assumed that it was her parents, or at the very least Eddie under the blankets with her blond hair showing. "Where my Mommy?!"

"Eva! Is there something wrong?" Henry quickly called out from the guest room down the hall which was the older Janko woman's usual accommodation, the two grandparents deciding to switch late the previous evening after she objected to him staying downstairs on the couch considering his age and the fact that his back required the firmer mattress on that bed. "She's crying… why did you yell at her? What happened?" he demanded as he pulled his robe on over his pajamas and searched for his glasses and slippers.

"It's fine... it was just a misunderstanding, Henry. I was startled, that's all," Eva advised in a louder voice directed at him as she gathered herself at the edge of the bed and urged a shaking Kaylin who was braced against the far wall to come back over to her for a hug. "Hush now, my kislány," she soothed in a quieter manner as she successfully managed to draw the little one onto her lap. "I'm so sorry, baby," she added as she kissed the top of her head and rocked. "Nagyanya just didn't expect you to do that," she explained. "You scared me while I was sleeping, but I know now I did the same to you. I should not have raised my voice."

" _I want my Mommy and Daddy!"_ Kaylin sobbed hysterically back although she allowed herself to be held and hugged by the now familiar older woman.

"I know you do... I know," Eva tried to comfort as she patted her back and looked over at the alarm clock which was displaying a time of six-thirty… too early in her estimation to call a daughter who by all accounts needed her rest more than ever now. "Mommy is still sleeping though, and it's very important for the baby that we don't wake her… we can't call your father yet, either… nothing at that place is apparently allowed at such an early hour," Eva tried to reason with a frightened little girl who only heard once again that this new brother or sister she didn't even know was more important than her… a notion which did not compute in the three-year-old's understanding, especially when she had overheard her mother telling Auntie Erin that it was all the girl baby's fault that her Daddy got hit by the car. "Why don't we wait just a little before we try your mother on her phone. We'll go downstairs with your Pop Pop, yes? And make some pancakes for breakfast. Would you like that?"

"NO! I want my _M-O-M-M-Y!_ The BABY is BAD and hurt Daddy!" Kaylin shouted back in an uncharacteristically defiant tone as she pushed herself away and ran crying down to her room before slamming her door, causing an unsuspecting Bear innocently strolling down the hallway to light out for his perch downstairs above the refrigerator in a blurred streak of black fur following the loud bang.

"Oh, dear," Eva sighed with an equal wish to run and hide.

"Acquired," Henry informed as he paused in the doorway with his hair still disheveled from sleep. "The Reagan temper," he informed Eva with a small smirk as he adjusted his glasses. "We're Irish, but always wondered if it was inherited or not… safe to say that little girl has just proven otherwise."

"Well if that's the case, she's gotten an extra dose with Edit's Serbian blood," Eva sighed as she likewise pulled her robe on. "Henry, my daughter will be so angry with me when she hears about this," she worried. "I'm afraid I have not made things better for her or Kaylin by coming here, not after what just happened and yesterday," she added sadly thinking about the confusion over the wording about Jamie coming home which had clearly upset her granddaughter and by extension Eddie further. "I seem to say all the wrong things. Edit and Jamison… they do a better job and have so much more patience with her than I do."

"Well, that's just not so, Eva," the Reagan family patriarch tried to assure. "Believe me… it might be your first trip through the wringer of having a grandchild this age, but it's my eighth rodeo and trust me, it gets harder the older I get, but this one… this little girl has been through more than all the others put together and she remembers everything about it. Sometimes you just have to realize that and the fact she's still insecure about what happened in that car last summer. No one else but Jamie, and now after this time your daughter, have ever been able to get her past that. Now with him hurt and the two of them away… I think we're all going to see a bit more of that temper until this is through."

"Frank settled her yesterday when he came," Eva reminded.

"Well, I'll give you that... now you know where Jamie gets it from, but remember Francis runs 35,000 cops in this city on a daily basis and that little girl can still put one over on him," he grinned. "C'mon, we'll work this as partners. I'll go in there and talk her down this time to bail you out if this afternoon you promise to teach me and the little girl how to make that Dobostorta dessert with the chocolate buttercream-layered sponge cake you brought to Thanksgiving… I barely got a chance to try it before it was gone. Francis talked about it for a week. When I'm stuck inside and worried about one of the kids, I cook," he explained with a shrug. "By the looks of things with the weather we're not going anywhere today or tomorrow, and if we have that here waiting I bet we can use it as a bribe for Eddie… the girl can eat," he added with a smile. "I know how to work her weak spots too."

"You are a very kind man, Henry Reagan," Eva acknowledged. "But Dobostorta is a Hungarian state secret," she professed with a straight face before breaking. "You have caramel and nuts?"

"Don't ever ask an Irishman if they have caramel in the house for a proper creamed whiskey coffee," he warned tongue in cheek, pleased that Eddie's mother seemed to be willing to listen to his advice after having displayed a rather strong will during previous encounters. Maybe having her stay at the house would work out after all. "And there's never a lack of nuts around here," he added.

###

"Good morning, Sergeant Reagan," Marguerite announced as she made her way into his room to find her charge blinking back slowly as he was roused from another restless off and on interrupted night's sleep. "I apologize for the earlier than expected wake up call, but we've had an appointment open up in the high definition scanner due to the weather and we're trying to get everyone finished so our tech can get home earlier if possible, although with the looks of things outside today that won't be happening for me, anyway," she added while opening the shades to the window to display the heavy white flakes falling.

"Too tired," he admitted with an irritable sigh at the thought of more tests as he squinted in the bright light. "Please… not 'til later."

"Negative," the nurse engaged him cheerfully in spite of his reticence. "Dr. Kenzie runs a tight ship here, and this needs to be done today to keep everything else on schedule this week. We've got to get you up and around soon. Your sister, Erin, told me yesterday that you have a little girl and a new baby on the way? You're a busy man so don't get used to lying around here taking it easy. Your wife is going to need some help before she's outnumbered."

"My wife?" Jamie asked he rubbed his eyes and tried to reassemble some coherent thoughts out of the once again muddled mess in his head the lack of uninterrupted sleep and constant use of drugs left behind. "She's with…" he trailed off again as he searched unsuccessfully for Kaylin's name at that point. "I don't know where she is... at home? I left her there… wanted to stay… should have stayed..."

"No, I believe Mrs. Reagan was across the street at the hotel last night," Marguerite informed patiently even though the notes left behind by the night nurse indicated he had asked the same question multiple times before which was a concern since they were constantly monitoring his mental status. "I'm sure she'll be over to visit, but it's only zero seven hundred hours, and she's not allowed to come in until nine so it's just you and us for now, handsome. If we get this scan out of the way now, you won't have to leave while she's here."

"But, my head," he complained as he touched his temple. "Everything's a mess again. I can't 'member stuff. Why…?"

"You, my dear, are a poster child for a good case of ICU delirium… we try to keep interruptions down to a minimum at night here which is why the visiting hours are so strict, but surgery, anesthesia, sleep deprivation, drugs, stress, confinement, pain… all those things add up and can have you seeing spiders on the walls or hearing voices. Not to worry though, it's not ideal, but not unusual either. All in all it's a small price to pay for getting you well again and it goes away about the same time you manage to get some decent rest. You've not had anything to that degree yet though, right?"

"I heard… singing I think..." he puzzled as he watched while she moved around efficiently disconnecting things to prepare him for transport before pressing a button on the console to summon an orderly. "Deep voice… like gospel, maybe?"

"Oh, no… now see, you're not as far off the mark as you think," she promised. "That, my dear, is your new ward mate, former petty officer Quincy Johnson. I'm sure you will run into him quite a bit when you're both ready for rehab downstairs. Lucky for you that boy is sleeping now because normally he's like a living, breathing… what do you call them? Not a jukebox… that's too old for him… not a Walkman, that was my day," she added still testing Jamie to see if he could connect the dots which by all accounts seemed to be beyond him at this point as he remained just laid back and drifted away from the conversation apparently uninterested in the details. "Anyway, Quincy sings whatever he's thinking about and knows the words to just about anything ever written so don't ever challenge him to a game of Name that Tune… he'll win every time."

"'Kay," Jamie agreed dejectedly with little enthusiasm as he stared back blankly at the window and managed to clear the fog enough to think about a little girl who should be jumping on his bed about now, excited to see all that snow and go outside and play in it with a father that couldn't do those things anymore. Kay... Kaylin... he was finally able to put together with a sad shake of his head. God, how unfair to her was all this?

"Dr. Kenzie said I have to stay… months… I want to go home…" he whispered sadly.

"I know," she sympathized softly and wondered for just a moment how many times she had heard that same pleading phrase from innumerable young men and women separated from loved ones and in a similar condition over the course of her career which had seen her stationed on the USNS Comfort, one of the Navy's most elite hospital ships. "Last night was a rough one, but at least now you know what you'll be facing and we don't do quitters here… not on my watch; so chin up Sergeant Reagan," Marguerite encouraged even as she made some quick notations in his chart about the likely onset of some delirium symptoms as well as an apparent marked depression. "How's the pain level right now, are you comfortable? You'll be down for the scan for approximately two hours. If you take a dose now, you'll sleep through it and wake up around the time your wife arrives."

"I'm fine… please, no more drugs," Jamie insisted as he forced himself to scootch up on the bed with only a slight grimace as his determination hardened. "M'm tired of feeling… like this… and it scares…" he blanked on Eddie's name again. "Damn it!"

"Oh, and I had such an easy time of it when Dr. Kenzie was gone and this ward was empty," the dedicated and experienced nurse sighed. Perhaps a planned introduction to Quincy should be encouraged sooner than later she observed as a distraction to one and an encouragement to the other. "You two boys will be the death of me in here for the next week or so," she chided as she pulled the rail back down on the bed and handed off his chart to the dark-haired orderly who had just arrived with a gurney and stepped behind the head of the bed with another male nurse at the foot to help transfer Jamie over. This time he could not help but grunt in pain as the whole of his left side lit up to a scale of eight in discomfort even though they were very careful as they slid him across.

"Ow… Christ, that hurts…" he gasped.

"See that? Now, I'm going to tell you one last time why trying to be superman and doing this without proper pain management will not fly here with me, and you're in my house right now so I make the rules," Marguerite admonished in a no-nonsense tough-love voice that rivaled his father's in authority even as she once again delivered the required dose for him and carefully made sure his leg was secured. "First of all, if you are in pain your blood pressure and heart rate will be higher, which is a major no no for your spleen injury right now, plus I will not have a bad outcome on my record because you came down with pneumonia from not being able to breathe properly. I like my job and I'm good at it so you need to trust me when I tell you how important this is. Understood?" she added a little more sharply in a manner reminiscent of an old Irish grandmother who would not be denied.

"Yes, ma'am," Jamie conceded once more without a fight as he was wheeled out of the room and towards the waiting elevator. "I liked my job… and I was good at it too," he muttered sadly as he allowed himself to wonder if that even mattered anymore.

"I'm sure you are," she softened as he was pushed inside and she held the door for another moment while considering the high-ranking positions of the visitors he had the day before which she was sure had no small part with his admission to this very program. "It appears by all accounts to be your blood to serve as it was in mine. My father is a retired four-star Admiral and I have twin younger brothers that went through Jacksonville and are deployed as aviation rescue swimmers in the Atlantic as we speak, so I understand the call to be part of a family business. Now it's up to both of us and a very good team that your doctor put together to get you back to it, okay?"

"Right," he sighed without conviction again while the doors closed as he glanced up to see the reflection of the man in the elevator with him who had actively been trying to stay out of Jamie's direct line of sight, and his eyes widened momentarily as a wave of recognition crossed them before a gloved hand covered his mouth to silence any outcry and a dark cloud forcefully descended once more than a needle found its mark and they closed against his will before he could move to confront him.

"Yeah, baby Reagan, it's me… goddamn it!" he cursed. "You just _had_ to get hit by the effing car and then wind up here to mess everything up, didn't you?" the orderly muttered as he stepped back and capped the carefully calibrated syringe before placing it in his pocket and fingering an illegally concealed cell phone. "Now I've got your father, brother and sister tangled up too close in this and look what I had to do… how am I supposed to play this off under their noses and get away with it? Years of planning all for nothing if you screw things up for me now… too bad you didn't listen to that nurse and go to sleep a little earlier. Unfortunately for the both of us you've already made me… can't have you to tip the rest of them off the way you talk on these meds before I finish this… not with everything that's riding on it. I made a promise when the Templar went down so I have to care of you now," he advised before the doors opened and he wheeled the gurney down a near-empty hallway.

"Don't worry though, you won't remember a thing."

* * *

 _Ruh-roh, like I told you, our superhero has a propensity for getting into trouble even when he's not looking for it. Just who is this guy, and what is it with poor Jamie winding up alone and defenseless in elevators? This time though he recognized the man, but surely Mason didn't come back to New York and find his way into such a secure facility that fast to make another sabotage attempt... or did he? Bahaha! I love fanfiction!_

 _Next, Eddie arrives that morning to find her husband MIA before a certain phone call comes in and threatens to rip another hole in her universe as two old foes are forced to square off and clash for the first time in this series. For those of you who are a bit worried about her over-emotional reactions to some of this, I did play with her character a bit in this story, but remember she's dealing with some pretty difficult stuff on top of hormones and Eva's presence, lol. This installment might be toughest on her in the end, but no fear, she comes good eventually and finds that strength she will need to deal with it._

 _Posting this in the middle of the blizzard. Nasty out there. Stay safe whoever is in Stella's path and please drop a review to keep me inspired... perfect day to sit inside and write today as long as we have power!_


	36. Chapter 36

Chapter 36

"Where is he?" Eddie demanded as she walked back to the central nurses' station in the surgical ward to find Marguerite after having arrived later than intended at nine-thirty due to another disagreement downstairs over the cause for her slightly elevated temperature. "Jamie… he's not in his room!"

"It's all right, dear," the older woman sought to ease her apparent fears as she looked up from her computer screen. "There was an early opening for the scan downstairs. They took him around seven. I expect he'll be brought back shortly."

"But he wasn't supposed to have that until after lunchtime… he would have called me first," Eddie insisted. "Jamie always makes sure I know if things change like that."

"I'm sure he usually does," Marguerite smiled as she sat back. "It's important though to remember that it's easy for a patient in his condition to forget or lose track of time when they are medicated and their world fails to revolve around a normal schedule. He had a quiet night according to the previous shift, but he was very tired and somewhat disoriented when I woke him. With all of those injuries it's difficult for him to sleep well, dear," she explained.

"Sleep… that's all he does," Eddie insisted sadly as her blue eyes welled up in frustration. "I thought the whole point of all these drugs is to force him to do that."

"The drugs force the body to rest so it can heal, but the mind gets caught up when it's not able to do the same. Unfortunately, sleep quality and quantity are two different things in critically ill patients," the nurse continued. "They tend to stay in the lighter stages of sleep with the sedation and fail to get the required REM… the required rapid eye movement periods our brain needs… when deprived of that they can develop an acute onset of impaired cognitive function, visual hallucinations, delusions, and illusions. Jamie is a bit altered today," she warned. "You should expect that he may display some of these symptoms this week. As I tried to explain to him though, it's something that will lessen and go away as he's able to adjust and get some true regular-patterned sleep. We try very hard here to keep the nighttime disturbances and noise to a minimum, but these episodes of delirium can and will happen."

"Then how can you tell the difference between that and the other complications he could have… that FES thing?" Eddie wondered. "It scares me and it all sounds the same."

"Experience and instincts, dear," Marguerite assured with a sympathetic look towards the obviously worried young wife and expectant mother. "Just like you will know the cause behind your baby's cries without a second look. He's following a normal pattern, although I will admit Jamie has displayed a high sensitivity to everything that has been done to him. Don't be surprised if he has periods of vivid wakeful dreams where he's seeing spiders on the wall for instance, or my personal favorite was a few years ago when a patient was convinced a giant bullfrog named Henrietta was living under his bed. He was a navy diver injured in an underwater blast, and no one in his unit or family thought he would ever recover from that," she patted a small ceramic remembrance of the amphibian that held a special place of honor on her desk. "But he did… and the next week we were laughing about it."

"Great, that's all we need… his grandfather's name is Henry," Eddie revealed as she thought back to the night before and the extended phone conversation she'd had with the Reagan family patriarch where he had managed to settle her to a degree after having ordered the hotel kitchen staff to send up a gourmet grilled cheese sandwich and soup in his absence while they talked. A similar discussion had followed that morning when she had called in only to hear about Kaylin's little meltdown and her cries for her mommy and daddy. "Only in our case it will be turkeys or nuns," she admitted with a wave of the hand while remembering his incident on the street just before Thanksgiving that had left Jamie recently traumatized. "Don't ask unless you remember seeing it on the news a couple of weeks ago."

"The Great NYPD Turkey Roundup… was that your husband?" Marguerite laughed. "Well, see… there you go, now we know what to look forward to. Remember the best thing you can do for him is to keep him quiet and calm so his body can naturally relax and recharge with less sedative interference. If he has periods of this, just go along with them… to him they are real."

"Shouldn't he be back by now though?" Eddie fretted anyway as a glance at the clock showed it to be quarter to ten already. "Dr. Kenzie said the scan would take two hours. That doesn't mean something's wrong, does it?"

"No, but it does seem to be taking longer than usual," the nurse agreed and could see that her advice would be difficult for the tense young woman to take, still she needed to keep trying. "Why don't you go relax in his room and I'll check on where things stand down there," she assured as she reached for the phone.

"Okay, thank you…," Eddie sighed as she wandered across the hall while noting that the other patient who had been brought from surgery the day before was alone but apparently resting comfortably. Frustrated by Jamie's absence, but determined to try to hold things together in front of him and everyone else a bit better today, she forced herself to sit down in the surprisingly comfortable bedside chair and after a few moments of reflection reached for the phone to call home. Given the earlier report from her mother, it wasn't going to be easy to explain to an apparent likewise overwhelmed child that her daddy wasn't available to talk to her once more.

###

"I not 'ungry!" Kaylin grumpily insisted once more as Henry and Eva had failed to coax the little girl into taking more than a bite or two of her breakfast before she went back on a hunger strike although her demands were simple. "I want _my_ Mommy and Daddy!" she insisted in a repeat of the current mantra which had not let up despite a great-grandfather's patient attempts to turn the tide.

"Sweetheart, you need to eat more than that if we're going to make that cake with Nagyanya later," Henry tried bribery even as the three-year-old crossed her arms and stubbornly dug in for the long haul. "Aye yi yi," he sighed. "There's something to that pig-headed gene theory too," he muttered under his breath before the house phone rang and Eva gratefully walked over to pick it up, hoping that another talk with Eddie, or better yet Jamie, would help smooth things over with her granddaughter.

"Hello… hello? Edit, is that you?" she answered, expecting to hear either her daughter or son-in-law's voice over the line. Instead, Henry watched as the older woman's expression went stone-cold flat in an instant after a moment's delay revealed the true identity of the caller and she somehow resisted the urge to slam the phone back down on the receiver. Even at his age, the volume was such that Henry clearly heard the automated message and his eyes also widened as what could only be described as a vortex in the universe threatened to open.

" _Ed-it... Jan-ko, you are receiving a collect call from inmate… Arm-in… Jan-ko… from the Federal Correctional Institution at Fairton, New Jersey. Press one to accept these charges and be connected. Press two to decline this call. Press three to permanently block this number from the approved call list. Be advised that all inmate communications may be monitored and recorded for your safety. Press nine to repeat this message."_

"Eva…" Henry warned as he watched her shaking finger hover over the third option. "Before this happened the kids were planning on going out there tomorrow for a visit to tell him about the baby..."

" _Ed-it... Janko, you are receiving a collect call from inmate…"_ the loop began again as Eva's face began to flush while her recently quelled temper mounted and threatened to explode in true mommazilla fashion. Despite the years that had passed, she had never forgiven her now ex-husband for his arrest over the ponzi scheme and the monetary indiscretions that had ruined their marriage and left her alone and destitute, nor had she spoken to him since he was led away from their home in handcuffs in front of their very impressionable late teenaged daughter.

"Eva, he's expecting them tomorrow, or he's checking to see if they've cancelled because of the weather," Henry continued to reason as he stepped slowly closer to try to take the phone out of her hand as if he was disarming a skittish perp. "He can't dial out to a cell phone or receive an incoming call in prison… that's why they've kept the landline here. Let me take that and tell him so he knows what's happened. Eddie wouldn't want him to worry..."

"WORRY?!" Eva snapped on that word and her eyes flashed as she snatched the handset away. "Let me assure you that ARMIN JANKO has never for a day worried about what he did to _US!"_ she declared as he backed away at her obvious determination to handle this herself even as her mind waffled back and forth on what to do.

" _Press nine to repeat this message..."_

Another click to buy time.

"Eva… you've come so far with Eddie, don't ruin that now. It was a long journey, but with Jamie's help she's been able to forgive her father and move on," Henry pleaded one last time to mitigate the circumstances and calm her down before she did something regrettable. "She can't deal with all that's happened this week and something else on top of it too. You have to try to do the same… she needs her family, all of it. Every one of us matters… especially now..."

"And you'll have to excuse me, Henry Reagan," the older Janko woman replied coldly before taking a determined stride away from her innocent unoka and towards the steps to go upstairs to the relative privacy afforded there. "This _is_ a family matter… a private _Janko_ family matter," she reiterated before closing the bedroom door behind her.

A controlled press of option number one followed.

###

"Busy," Eddie muttered as she hung up the phone, unaware that her parents were having a reunion of sorts on the line at that very moment, especially when a call to Eva's cell number also went unanswered. "Terrific, and now my mother is apparently missing too," she griped and stood up to go to the window and watch as the heavy flakes were blanketing the campus just as fast as the crews could come through and plow the various drives and parking lots. It had been a very good call on Frank's part to have her stay here last night as given the conditions outside she would have never made it in from Bay Ridge otherwise, but there was a little girl stranded there now that obviously needed parental attention too.

"I screwed up again, munchie," she admitted after walking back over to the chair to sit down as she pulled on her tightening waistband and placed her hands over her tummy. "First off, I should have packed more comfortable fat clothes because now even my favorite pants don't fit," she lamented. "But I also should have let Pop Pop stay here and brought Kaylin so I could be with her at night… I don't feel like I'm thinking straight about what's best for her, or making things better for anyone… and now I'm not paying enough attention to you either," she added as she leaned back and rubbed her belly. "It hasn't even been a week since we found out about what might be going on… and it's only two weeks before we… I mean I... well, you and me… have to go back to Dr. Geisner to have her take another look at you. How am I going to do that by myself? Your Daddy is never going to be able to come with me, and he'll be so upset about missing it," she sighed sadly. "You have to be okay, you know… Please, baby, I just really need for you to do that for me… Daddy… he needs all of us right now," she trailed off. "Although it would be nice if I knew where he was," she frowned after getting up again to glance out in the hall and finding Marguerite's desk tellingly empty. It was now nearly ten o'clock and more than an hour over the expected time when he should have returned.

"What is going on here?!" Eddie demanded as she paced the corridor; her nervous acquired sixth sense air of something's-gotta-be-wrong catching the attention of the other patient who was on the ward, awake but observing quietly for now against his nurse's predictions.

"Where _is_ my husband?!"

###

"Edit Katalin, moja ljubav... my sweetie, you took so long to answer, I didn't think you were at home… but where else in this weather would you be?" Armin Janko chided as he sat in one of the phone cubicles in his orange jumpsuit and shifted back in his chair. His relief was short-lived, however, and his blood ran cold before he nearly dropped the receiver as a voice he never prepared himself to hear again cut over the line.

"Zdravo… hello, Armin," his ex-wife's icy greeting knifed into his ear, spilling over with contempt.

"Eva..." was all the stunned man could manage at first as his mind whirled. "Prokletstvo," he cursed under his breath although he knew she had heard him. "What are you doing there? Gde je moja ćerka… where is my daughter?!" he demanded as the first thought that crossed his mind was filled with fear that something must have happened to her… that profession, a police officer… why else would her mother be in New York City instead of her usual lair of Rochester? "Šta radiš tamo… what are you doing there? Answer me!" he demanded again.

"Tvoja ćerka… _your_ daughter?! Where is she?!" Eva snapped back as she matched him in his native Serbian. "Ja ću vam reći gde je… I will tell you where she is! Edit is with her husband at a hospital. Jamison was struck by a car three days ago in Washington and is hurt badly; his leg is broken in many places. She had to go there before his family brought him back to the city by helicopter for care, and now he cannot come home until he has more surgeries. I am here because she needs me to be. Gde si… where are you?! Oh, zaboravio sam… I forgot, you are still in a prison where you cannot help her! Ostavi je! Ona nema mesta za vaše probleme sada!... Leave her be! She doesn't have room for your problems right now! She has too many!"

"Šta? Šta drugo nije u redu… what? What else is wrong?" Armin demanded as he sparred with her over their daughter, just as they had done for many years.

"Ona je tek u drugom stanju, beba nije u redu, a sada njen muž. Ona ne treba da se meša… she is only just pregnant, the baby is not right, and now her husband. She does not need you to interfere!" Eva revealed to him and announced the presence of their first blooded grandchild.

"Moja beba, ona je trudna? Već, oni su samo u braku! Kada?... my baby, she is with child? Already, they are just married! When?"

"Sa medenog meseca ... ona je da ima bebu u junu, ali ne brinite vi nećete biti tu za nju tada ni!.… from their honeymoon... she is to have the baby in June, but do not worry you will not be there for her then either!"

"I am what I can be for her now!" Armin snapped. "You are the one living in the past! Now what is wrong with the beba?"

"One of the bubrezi… the kidneys is too big," she explained. "The doctor must watch for now. Perhaps it will be fine… they do not know yet. If it is not, Edit… she will not be well. She does not handle things like this since you betrayed us."

"Eva," Armin sighed. "Neka se završi… let it end… it is over. I am sorry for the things that you cannot forgive, but Edit is not only your daughter, she is mine too. Her heart is more open than yours," he declared.

"And now when it is broken, and she needs her mother and father…"

"I will always be her father, and when I am able I will be there. What's in the past is done and I regret it, but please, for her… Eva, we must be finished with this between us… Promise to tell her I am sorry for the beba and for what happened to Jamie; he is a good husband for my devojčica and father of my unuci. Now, when will she be home?" he asked. "I will call again to speak to her instead."

"I do not know," Eva answered truthfully, her initial anger subsiding slightly as she finally had the opportunity to express it, but now allowed her concern for Eddie and Jamie to calm her ire and override the bitterness she held so long for her ex-husband. "Jamison is at Columbia… not many can visit now, they are very strict. He will have more surgery Monday and Thursday… it is very bad though, he cannot walk for now and Edit has not left his side except for when they require it."

"Will he recover?" Armin asked, concerned that his daughter would now be the primary caregiver for three instead of one and now soon to be two children. "She cannot do this alone. I will not allow that, not even from here… no matter what you intend."

"To ne može da se još uvek ne zna... that cannot be known yet," Eva admitted. "But she will not be without her cela porodica… her whole family no matter. The Reagans will insist she is one of them and they can handle these things, but she is mine and I am staying here and moving back to the city for her. It is over now, Armin… what this was between us. I will put it away and promise her that."

###

"Where _is_ my husband?!" Eddie repeated once again even as the sound of the elevator ding when it arrived on the floor saw her hurrying down the hall towards the opening doors. Relief washed over her as she turned the corner to find Jamie being wheeled out of the car although that soon faded as she noticed Dr. Kenzie and Marguerite exiting behind in attendance while pointing to something on his chart and discussing whatever it was in earnest, hushed tones.

"Is he okay?" she demanded and quickly noted that his eyes, while open, did not focus on her as he passed, but rather stared straight ahead. "Jamie! What happened? Why was he gone so long?"

"Mrs. Reagan," Kenzie acknowledged as she looked up. "We were just going over his medication history. The tech had difficulty with the scan which is why the procedure took so long."

"What kind of difficulty?" Eddie demanded. "What was wrong with his medicine? Why is he like this?"

"Nothing that we can see. Initially when he arrived in the lab, he had some jerky muscle movements for the first half hour or more which required her to wait and restart several times. These measurements on the uninjured left side are used to print the matrix which will be placed in his right femur, and must be precise so that his bone will heal at the same length. Something is off though. Marguerite called me down there after she checked on him because she feels those twitches and this dissociative state he appears to be in… what we describe as the patient looking as if "the lights are on, but no-one's home" is not his normal reaction to the level of patient-controlled analgesia he is prescribed so we are looking at every other possible cause including an overdose due to an equipment failure of the infusion unit or the incorrect agent being administered. So far though all of it has checked out normally though. We've changed everything as a precaution and I'll send it to the lab for testing."

"You think he was drugged with the wrong stuff or had too much of it? How could you let that happen?!"

"It did not… not on my watch," Marguerite insisted vehemently. "Every vial, every bag is barcoded and scanned before it is administered and his current drip was started by the night shift nurse before she left. He had no such reaction when I sent him downstairs and nothing else was supposed to have been added since then."

"But I thought you said that he could have states like that today, right?" Eddie asked as she looked towards the nurse before hurrying her step into Jamie's room. "This isn't that?"

"Experience and instincts, dear," Marguerite reminded as she followed close behind. "I know my patients, and this is definitely not that."

* * *

 _Did anyone expect Eva and Armin to go head-to-head like that, even over the relative safety of the phone? Poor Eddie, wait until she hears about that one, but first she will have to deal with a husband who is convinced that not only did his dead brother run him over in the Chevelle, but now he's been targeted by someone from the past. And Jamie, they're asking for the truth about what he saw, and he's giving to them, but no one will believe him and very soon he will use that to begin to doubt himself too._

 _Next up, Danny explains a few things to the boys before being unwittingly drawn further into Malevsky's intended trap while Eddie manages finally to pull herself together enough to bring some much-needed comfort to her husband._

 _For anyone who doesn't know the whole story behind the "Great NYPD Turkey Roundup," mentioned at the start of this chapter you can read the two-shot "No Good Deed…" in the Snapshots II collection in my profile._


	37. Chapter 37

Chapter 37

"Hey, Mom! Dad! We're home!" Sean called out as he and Jack stomped in the front door of their home in Staten Island early that afternoon, thoroughly covered from head to toe in the big, white fluffy flakes that were still falling heavily outside. "Dad! Look at how much money we made!" he exclaimed as he pulled a wad of bills out of his pocket. "We've been shoveling people's walks by Ginny's house all morning long!"

"That's great guys, but keep it quiet; your Mom is finally sleeping upstairs," Danny warned from the kitchen where he was making a failed attempt at the prep work for a homemade lasagne dinner, complete with flour on his face, stains on his shirt and an apron wrapped haphazardly around his waist.

"Wait, what's wrong with Mom?" Jack stopped with the smile melting off his face immediately. Ever since the shooting at the hospital he had a bad feeling well up anytime Linda had any issues with her back or had fallen under the weather. "Is she sick?" he demanded, now worried about that doctor's appointment he and his brother had been ferried away for.

"No, she's not sick," Danny assured and downplayed the pain his wife had been in now that some rest, ice and a long warm shower had finally seemed to lessen it. "That test she had yesterday made her back a little sore and they gave her some pills for it, but that hasn't helped too much so she didn't sleep well last night down here on the couch. She just needs to take it easy for a few days... that's all, guys, and she might seem kind of down for a while because she was hoping that the doctor might be able to take that piece of the bullet out, but he says it's better if it stays where it is. Now stop dripping all over the floor, I just cleaned it… and put that wet clothing up in the laundry," he deflected intentionally to take their attention away from Linda and the worse pain in her heart she was suffering through.

"Dad, you sound just like Mom," Sean laughed more innocently as he pushed himself out of his snow boots and dropped his wet gloves and jacket on the ground next to the coat rack. "Ha ha! You look like her too!" he giggled and grabbed his sides as Danny came around the corner with a scowl on his face for his youngest.

"Watch it weisenheimer," he warned. "Gloves, hats… all the wet stuff in the dryer," he repeated. "C'mon, help me out this weekend guys. I don't want your Mom to feel like she's gotta get up and do anything, plus we have to take turns keeping the walks clear. Every time the plow comes through it throws the snow right back up in the driveway. My car has to be able to get out in case I get called into work."

"How's Uncle Jamie?" Sean continued as he picked up his things since their mother had glossed over the seriousness of the accident until it was clear what her brother-in-law would be facing and had only told the boys that he had been hit by a car and had a broken leg. "Will we take him Sunday dinner at the hospital tomorrow like we did for Grandpa Henry at Thanksgiving, or does he have to talk on the phone like you and Mom did that time?" he questioned, figuring that since his dad was here cooking and talking about laundry his uncle must be okay now too. "Can we sign his cast like when Jack broke his arm in football?"

"No, uh… sport. Listen, why don't you two come sit here for a second and we'll talk about Uncle Jamie," Danny advised as the two boys joined him on the couch. "First off, tomorrow looks like we won't have a dinner anywhere but here. Your Mom's not supposed to be on her feet yet, Grandpa had to stay at 1PP over the weekend, and Grandpa Henry is busy watching Kaylin at their house while Aunt Eddie is with Jamie up at the hospital they took him to, but that's about an hour away. He's gonna have to stay a bit," Danny revealed to them. "The doctor said he needs to be there at least two more weeks while he has a couple more operations, and then he'll only get to come home on the weekends for a while."

"Why?" Jack asked. "Mom said he broke his leg. Can't he just use crutches or a cane like when Grandpa sprained his ankle?"

"Not yet, Jack. Uncle Jamie got hurt pretty bad. He broke some ribs, but his leg… the car hit it really hard and broke the bones here… here and here," he pointed to the various spots. "It's gonna to take a while to fix everything, and he's going to have to work really hard to walk on it again, but after he has a special operation on Thursday, he'll be able to start moving it and getting better… he won't even have a cast on but probably a brace like when Tyler tore his ACL on your team, Jack."

"So he won't be able to play basketball with us or soccer with Kaylin?" Sean asked sadly as those were some of his favorite pre-dinner activities with his uncle before Sunday dinner. "But she really likes that," he added, not wanting to admit his own disappointment.

"He won't be able to… not right away, bud," Danny acknowledged while keeping the possible more dire prognosis away from them for now. "But everyone needs to pitch in and help, so the three of us can do that by taking her to practice and making sure she still gets to play with her team once a week and sometimes maybe Mom and I will have drive Jamie back uptown to his appointments or stay over at their house or bring Kaylin here to babysit while Eddie is working… things like that."

"Will he get to run in his race?" Jack asked. "The one for kids with cancer that he's been training for?"

"No, bud, not this time at least," his father answered honestly, fairly certain now that was one more thing on Jamie's bucket list that would now go unchecked.

"That stinks," Sean summed it up succinctly as his father wrapped his arm around for a hug.

"Yeah, it does," Danny agreed as he sat back with both his boys and considered the challenges his brother now faced both professionally and personally with a new wife, a young daughter and another child on the way. "It really does stink."

###

"So how far along is your wife?" Marguerite asked pointedly as she tried to engage Jamie once more after several failed attempts had left the three women frustrated and concerned at his continued flattened affect with little or no emotional expression for the last hour. Kenzie had left a few minutes before to go to the lab with a urine sample and to hurry along the blood test previously ordered although whatever it was seemed to be lifting slightly now and the nurse was using whatever she could to encourage that along.

"Jamie, c'mon," Eddie begged as she squeezed his hand in an attempt to reconnect with him. "You know all this… I know you do. Tell her what the fruit of the week is."

"What?" he finally responded verbally as he snapped out of whatever funk he was in and focused on her face for the first time since his return. "Ed?"

"Hey, welcome back," she sniffed in relief and gently kissed his forehead, refusing to let go now that she had his attention even as he backed away a little deeper against the bed while his breath came heavier and his eyes narrowed at her close approach. "Tell Marguerite what the baby is up to… we're just starting the second trimester," she patted her tummy and explained to the nurse in an effort to clue him in. "This week at twelve was a lime... we were supposed to make key lime pie for dessert at dinner tomorrow, but we'll have to see if we can order some with your supper instead now. What comes next?"

"Thirteen?" he questioned, still not putting the whole request together.

"Well, that's a step forward," Marguerite acknowledged with some relief as she noted the change of his demeanor and time in his file. "Personally though, limes are not my favorites unless they're in a drink… too sour, anything sweeter?" she asked as she typed.

"Mango?" he reached in a puzzled effort to comply as he pulled that one out of obvious order.

"Oops, that's a bit too big," Eddie insisted with a look of concern flashed at the nurse since Jamie could normally recite this information upside down, backwards and in Swahili. "My belly would be out to here by then," she demonstrated. "I think the munchie is still a lot smaller… something like a _tangerine,"_ she hinted shamelessly with emphasis to put him on the right path. "What else can you tell us? Maybe that she can suck her thumb and smile already, or do you still think it's a boy?"

"I don't know, Ed… why are you asking me?" Jamie reacted out of character with frustration and marked suspicion. "You're with them trying to trick me," he accused as he shook away from her grasp on his arm.

"Them? Them who?" she demanded before Marguerite put her hand up and silently signaled her not to press too hard. She had reminded Eddie not to confront Jamie if he was in this delirious state, but rather to go along with it in an effort to keep him calm until it passed. What neither could know was that he had been dosed with something to cloud his memory by the man in the elevator to keep his identity a secret for now… an action that was on the verge of succeeding even as Jamie battled with a few stubborn facts that remained stuck in his brain as truth while the surrounding edges blurred… literally as his vision doubled and threatened to make him sick to his stomach.

"The FBI I think… 'member him from before," he begged as his arm went over his eyes to hide them. "He was there again. Baby Reagan… he called me baby Reagan… just like… Sonny did after… they got Joe killed."

"Joe was Jamie's older brother," Eddie explained when the nurse raised an eyebrow. "He was a police officer too, but he died a long time ago while working undercover with the FBI."

"It's not unusual for the delusions and paranoia to revolve around work or traumatic memories," Marguerite assured quietly as they both jumped to that conclusion while she noted Jamie's blood pressure and heart rate creeping up once more. "Just stay calm and keep reorienting him to the present to see if you can switch him over to something more relaxing. Delirious patients may become increasingly agitated and confused when treated with more sedatives, so it would be much better for him to not do that and Dr. Kenzie wants to avoid adding anything else to the mix if at all possible."

"No! No more drugs! He did that to me! Just, please stop!" Jamie insisted as that claustrophobic feeling of being trapped and having his mouth covered was resurfacing while his chest was tightening as the panic welled up once more. "I don't feel so good now."

"No more, I promise," Eddie assured as she steadied herself and once again wished she could crawl onto the bed next to him to cuddle and soothe. "Jamie, it's me… please listen, you know I would never do anything to hurt you. You're just overtired and need to try to relax so you can sleep for real without any more of that stuff and then you'll start to feel better," she explained softly as she started touching him once more, and while he flinched initially, her familiar caress soon began to work its magic and he sagged back a little. "Let's talk about something else. Remember on our honeymoon in Iceland when we stopped at the spa that first morning and got to float in the lagoon with the snow all piled up around it?"

"Think so," he admitted finally after a few more moments as his eyes remained closed while he tried to picture it. "Warm and cold at the same time."

"That's right. The hot springs made the water so soft and blue... you said it was because of some kind of minerals, but all I knew was that I had never seen something so beautiful in my life before, and I was with you which made it the best thing ever… I even told you that I wanted to stay there the whole time, but I'm glad we saw everything else too… even that rocking boat in the storm that made me sick and the night at the cottage with the Northern Lights that left us with our little munchie. Try to focus on that first place we went, baby," she pleaded. "The blue lagoon… this time I'll hold you up as we float along," she soothed and started to rub small circles on his chest while Marguerite noted with relief that his vitals were dropping back to normal accordingly. "I've got you… I'm not going anywhere," she added in familiar fashion.

"It's working," the nurse encouraged in a whisper with a thumbs up.

"You and I can just stay there for a while," Eddie continued, taking her time between words to lull him gently along. "Trust me… all you have to do is keep your eyes closed, Jamie… relax and float and remember how good you felt that day. Nothing will hurt you. When all of this is over we're going to go back there where everything can be perfect again... I promise, lambchop," she added as her actions coupled with pure exhaustion saw him off into his first and much-needed restful sleep since the accident, at least until some of the circling demons revisited one last time.

###

"No, I'm not asking… I'm telling you I need his records sent up here, all of them, including what was done before I took over the case!" Dr. Kenzie insisted before a click on the end of the line from the emergency department of the hospital in Washington confirmed that was not going to happen. "Damn it!" she cursed as she stared at the initial drug test results in front of her which purported that Jamie's findings were clean except for appropriate levels of the narcotics she was currently prescribing for him until a soft knock at the door interrupted her thoughts.

"She managed to get him to sleep," Marguerite reported as she felt confident enough to step away after Jamie had quieted. "Are those the results?" she added with a bit of worry. "I did not make an error," she insisted.

"I know you didn't… nothing on the first test is out of the ordinary," Kenzie revealed. "But the second urine test… it's…"

"Ketamine," Marguerite answered for her. "Disorientation, muscle ticks, general confusion… memory impairment."

"My first guess too, but there isn't any stored on our drug carts and the vials for supply in the surgical suite are unopened and accounted for… every single drop," Kenzie assured. "He does have metabolites for it in his system, but all that tells us is he's been exposed recently, and if you would have seen the absolute mess of an ER in Washington… God only knows what he got when they were prepping him for surgery with that other doctor, and well… they're refusing to send me the files anymore because I sort of didn't play well with others down there and I think they're worried about a lawsuit," she smirked.

"But that's a fast-acting drug," Marguerite insisted.

"Yes, for the anesthesia qualities, but the psychological effects reportedly can be apparent for a week in some individuals. Jamie is so sensitive it is possible, perhaps likely that the delirium just intensified it… at this point I have no other explanation and a second blood test would have to be sent out which is not going to happen in this weather over the weekend anyway," she offered as she sat back considering the absolute iron-clad security she counted on and the intensive vetting each of her employees had undergone. "His infusion unit did not test positive for it either… Let's just keep a careful watch on him the rest of the afternoon, and since she seems to have a hold of herself now if his wife is able to keep him settled I'll clear it for her to stay as long as needed. Make sure he's hydrated. What about Quincy?" she asked as she shifted her attention over to her other post-surgical patient.

"Behaving and staying quiet for once since I told him his ward mate needed sleep," Marguerite informed her. "Taking his meds, all of his stats are normal and the incisions look good. At least one of these boys has been cooperating with me," she huffed with indignation as she prided herself on making sure each of her charges received the utmost level of care. "He's asking for Commander Rigsby to be allowed in for a visit, though. I think… I think maybe that would be very good for Sergeant Reagan, too," she added knowingly. "He's going to need some strong direction to get through what comes next."

"I agree it's about time, but I want them both to rest today especially after what happened this morning. Hold him off until tomorrow, and then you can tell Janet to look the other way when the Commander goes on one of his nightly walkabouts," Kenzie allowed and then smiled as her phone lit up with a now-familiar incoming number from one Rick Fellows. "If you'll excuse me."

"Mm-hmm," the older woman nodded, knowing exactly who that was and the looks that had been exchanged between the two when he had been present the other night. "'Bout time for that too," she smirked before leaving.

###

"Isn't it time to be done yet? I'm tired," Sean whined as the allure of shoveling was diminished when the white stuff kept dumping down and there was no promise of payment on the other end. "I wish this stupid storm would be over!" he added with a kick that sent a pile of loose snow clods scattering over the freshly cleared sidewalk.

"Well, we were done until you did that. Go," Danny sighed as he directed his youngest to clean up the residual mess. "Seems like there's a lull coming for the next few hours so this should be good for a while. Jack, why don't you put our shovels up in the little shed on the side of the house and we'll keep your brother's by the door," he asked as he handed over his implement while they walked up the driveway and Sean finished by the street.

"Dad!" Sean yelled suddenly as he lingered behind. "Look! I found your wallet laying over here on the ground by the mailbox! Oy! It's the one with your badge!" he revealed as he came running back with the item. "Finder's keepers! Twenty bucks!" he teased at first refusing to hand it over.

"My badge?" Danny puzzled as his hand went immediately to his pocket which was of course empty because he was sure he had left his own inside on the table where it belonged. "Let me see that," he demanded until his youngest finally complied and he opened the fold to reveal an NYPD Detective's badge. "This isn't mine," he added as he looked at the gold shield's number 16543.

"Then how did it get here?" Sean asked. "It wasn't before."

"Maybe somebody cleaning up found it on the street and figured it belonged to me so they dropped it off on top of the mailbox and it fell down," Danny reasoned while wondering why the accompanying ID was missing from its plastic holding space. "Terrific, this looks like a legit one too," he muttered, knowing that a call to IAB was the prescribed route to follow… but losing one's badge was a major headache, leading to lots of annoying paperwork and a penalty that could cost up to ten days pay… so much so that many officers kept their actual badge at home and bought a fake "dupe" one for everyday use. Danny was in no mood at this point to stick himself too far out on a limb for someone he didn't know, but he hated to see another cop get pinched like that so he promised to do what he could to keep it under the radar for now. "I'll take care of it. I need to make a phone call when we get inside," he shrugged. "Don't tell Grandpa until I find the guy it belongs to," he made Sean promise before taking a quick look up and down the empty street as those prickly hairs on the back of his neck raised again before he closed and locked the door behind them.

* * *

 _So who's badge might that turn out to be, and how will it link back to Malevsky and his little refocused scheme to mess with our Danny boy's mind? Speaking of that, he's done a real number on his brother… or has he? Still to be determined although something untoward is definitely going on under Kenzie's nose up at Columbia. Coming up next though is a nice long chapter as Jamie struggles with memories and nightmares while being told they are just delusions and Danny deals with a needy wife at home before another set of those coincidences will have him stressing and looking over his shoulder as he steps up his investigation._


	38. Chapter 38

Chapter 38

"Ed… Eddie…" a tired, raspy voice and a reaching hand touching her own as it rested on the edge of the bed next to his roused her from the nearby recliner and what had honestly been the longest, deepest sleep she herself had experienced since this whole nightmare had begun. "Time is it?" he questioned as he squeezed her fingers and grimaced with a small cramped-up stretch.

"Six," she reported after a glance at the clock on the table as she pushed herself forward and sat up while rubbing her face and yawning. "Wow, I guess we both really needed that," she acknowledged. "Are you feeling better now?"

"Yeah, I guess… considering," he admitted with a small shake of his head to try to further clear it. "What happened?" he puzzled since his recall of the entire day was nothing more than a blur. "Why is it so late? You've been here all this time?"

"Of course… it's not like I could have gone anywhere else if I wanted to. You should see the snow piled up outside…" she revealed as she walked over to the drapes and pulled them back. "Over twenty inches already the last time I heard… you were just really, really tired, Jamie," she added while finally addressing his first question. "Your brain needed sleep, that's all," she comforted without getting into any of the details as she turned back around and her husband noted the dark circles under her eyes... obviously he was not the only one requiring that at the moment.

"The house," he worried openly as he pushed himself up. "Who's taking care of… can't be Gramps or your… um, Eva," he stumbled over his thoughts slightly again. "I was supposed to..."

"Your Dad hired people for both places," she assured. "Please, Jamie… relax, it's being done, okay? I talked to Mom after lunch. Everything is fine at home; she was going to spend the afternoon teaching Kaylin and Pop how to make Dobostorta… that cake she brought at Thanksgiving," she explained. "Maybe they can save you some for later this week… are you hungry? You didn't really have anything to eat yet, and it's really important now that you get the right nutrition and enough calories to heal. Marguerite was explaining to me about the extra calcium and protein you should have, plus vitamin D…"

"Stop it… please," he sighed as her determined run was hurting his head and he rubbed his face while frowning at the stubbly dryness and the irritating plastic of the nasal cannula again. "I don't want you to worry about me; you're the one that needs to eat right for the baby. I just… I just want to get up," he pleaded as his eyes lifted and his hand struggled to find the bed controls. "I can't… I can't stand being stuck in one place like this… I feel helpless," he breathed as the claustrophobia that had touched him since being trapped under that beam the previous year revisited and he pushed the heel of his good leg down and winced at the corresponding shift of his upper body, but it was not enough to deter him. "I need to get up…" he added as he reached across to his left arm where his IV lines were secured.

"Oh, no, no, no! No you don't!…" Eddie reacted and quickly got a hold of him before he managed to undo anything. "Jamie, you absolutely cannot do that… please, not yet. If you try, you'll hurt yourself more or they'll have to sedate you, and we'll have to go through this all over again."

"All what over again?" he demanded even as he relented to the desperation in her voice and eased back trying to read the situation while picking up on her reluctance to speak the truth.

"Nothing, it just made you… I mean you were tired, so you didn't know what you were saying," she admitted with a frowny face not wanting to reveal that he had been stuck back in the past somehow reliving part of his brother's murder. "It's not important."

"What? Honey, if I said something to hurt you…"

"Oh, no, lambchop… it was nothing like that," she assured. "You were just sort of dreaming while you were awake and not making a lot of sense. You forgot the fruit of the week… stuff like that."

"I forgot the… but m'm doing a lot of that… letting you and Kaylin down," he admitted with a depressed sigh. "It's not right… you're both supposed to be able to count on me."

"Jamie, you are not doing anything to me or her… we love you so much. I'm just glad that you're going to get better soon, and we have to try to get through this next week or so until you can come home and be with us, okay? I do count on you… I will always count on you, but right now we have to let other people help, and you need to trust me to handle things for a little while. Pop says you're just like your Dad about letting others do for you, so I know that's hard to accept," she added with a smug little smile to try to lighten his mood. "Almost as hard as letting me take the wheel since you say I drive just like Mario..." she trailed off suggestively hinting at those Andretti sunglasses.

"Kart?" he answered quizzically instead as he lay back and rubbed his hand over his eyes, blanking on one of their familiar banters and not picking up on the possible snoop through the presents he had purchased. Even though he was more alert, it was obvious there were still deficits in his responses.

"Sure, baby… just like him," she agreed to placate him while her attention was diverted out in the hall as a thin, but curious-looking short-statured middle-aged dark-haired man with an ironically tight upturned mustache approached Jamie's room in the supposed strictly controlled surgical ward while staring intently inside, seemingly ignoring the fact that Eddie's eyes were locking right back on him as she instinctively inched closer to the bed before the stranger nodded at her with pursed lips and moved on quickly down the hall towards Kenzie's office.

"Now, just who the hell was that…?" Eddie mouthed without alerting her husband to the disturbance. "I swear there's just something weird about this place," she added with a little more volume as her spidey sense flared before quickly being pushed aside once more.

"Ed," Jamie started in obvious discomfort again. "I need… please, um… get the nurse," he asked since she was still gripping the control well out of his reach.

"What is it? I told you... you have to let me help you," she insisted while focusing her attention back down on him.

"No, I need to… can't get up," he explained with urgency while blushing with humiliation at bringing this up in front of his wife. " _Please."_

"Oh… I mean okay! I'm sorry, baby," she replied after catching on although her heart hurt at his apparent embarrassment and she soon found herself down the hallway in the small cafe room intently studying one of the detailed nutritional pamphlets for patients undergoing bone repair that Marguerite had provided while having her own bite of dinner as Jamie's personal needs were attended to by one of the male nurses. "I have got to be better at this stuff," she murmured as she checked off the items he already regularly ate and mentally noted some of the other suggestions. "Foods rich in protein include meat, dairy products and tofu… tofu, ick…" she shuttered. "If you are a vegetarian, peanut butter, yogurt and cottage cheese… gag... contain high levels of protein," she recited.

"While he's here, the nutritionist on staff will take care of all that," the aforementioned nurse reminded as she stepped in on a break to have a cup of tea herself, having been informed of the need to work a double shift as the weather was proving too treacherous for the night nurse to make it in. "We just have to get him to eat it," she added with a bit of concern considering the fact that Jamie had not touched a meal all day. "Right now he requires as much as three times his normal intake of calories to begin healing, and I'm afraid that's not happening."

"I know. I promise I'll get him to eat dinner tonight as soon as I go back, but for when he comes home…" Eddie trailed off desperately wishing that could happen sooner rather than later, but knowing in her heart that she and her husband were looking at a long process. "Jamie is always the one to do this; he plans things out for me and the baby, but right now he's… well, he's not himself," she admitted with a sigh. "Who was that man who came down the hallway before?" she asked out of the blue as her curiosity go the better of her, and frankly that gaze he had given Jamie unnerved her. "He looked in at us… stared, actually. It was kinda creepy. Is he on the staff too?"

"Short man with a twisted up mustache or a taller fellow with his arm in a sling?" Marguerite smiled, wondering if the harmless Commander Rigsby had skirted her perimeter barricades earlier than intended.

"Mustache," Eddie informed.

"Oh, well that's Oliver Wendell, dear. He's not on the staff… he's the reason for it. That's the program's director and main investor. He must be here to see Dr. MacKenzie."

###

"CHARLOTTE!" a gruff voice startled Kenzie's focused attention away from her computer screen in her office as she was mapping out the detailed parameters for the printed matrix needed for Jamie's second operation. "Why is there an unauthorized person in there alone with the subject?" he demanded from the hallway before letting himself in without invitation and closing the door. "Pre-surgical visits are supposed to be strictly supervised so that proprietary information is not released!" he insisted. "You promised to control all of that when I agreed to accept this case! This is a critical outcome for FDA approval, and with the media attention that is bound to follow with him being the son of the Police Commissioner, it is imperative we follow procedure! Now you are asking me to approve outside care? I will not have this study compromised and the intellectual secrets stolen!"

"Oliver," Kenzie sighed as she sat back and viewed her somewhat tightly wound investor while wondering just for a second how he had managed to make it into the city from his lavish mansion upstate on a day where all forms of travel in the greater North East had ground to a halt. "We needed this test case to show the protocol can work as designed for recent trauma… he was the perfect candidate, but these are people with families… not lab rats," she emphasized. "I couldn't just pluck him out of the other hospital with a promise to return him at a later date, and he's not a soldier assigned to active duty across the country so he has local connections here. All the family has been told is the basics of what needs to be done and when, but absolutely nothing has been revealed in their presence outside of the norm of treatment for such an injury. The confidentiality papers were signed. You have nothing to worry about, and in my opinion we have a much better chance of showing a positive outcome by allowing the family to have a more active role in caring for him. Studies show…"

"I am not interested in other studies!" Wendell insisted as he cut her off rather rudely. "I care for only this one and the hundreds of millions of dollars it represents to my company… approval from the FDA and a patent on the process is why you are funded for this state-of-the-art facility and provided with such discretion. Now get on with his treatment and don't make me regret saying that!" he insisted impatiently in almost a hiss.

"You will not," Kenzie assured as she worked her always-tense boss patiently, knowing that in spite of his apparent quirks she had hit the virtual lottery by cultivating this relationship with the deep-pocketed man, even if it brought with it constant vigilance against the possibility of corporate espionage from the intensely competitive and lucrative medical technology industry. "You hired me to develop and prove this protocol works, and it does," she admitted proudly. "The first patients to receive minor implants are all doing well, and now that we are moving on to the more complex repairs we're on a fast track for that patent. You need to trust me when I tell you that positive outcomes in these trauma cases require more than just our process… we're dealing with circumstances greater than a broken or missing bone here. You said I have discretion, so let me use it," she insisted. "My stake in this is just as great as yours," she added while considering her life's work and her determination to help people like Jamie and her former SEAL comrade Quincy walk again. "It's my reputation on the line and I promised myself I would find a way to heal some of these boys... Trust me when I tell you I won't let anything stand in the way of that."

"Very well," Wendell conceded with an even tone. "Use your so-called discretion in this matter, but know all of that can disappear like this if you make the wrong choice," he added as he snapped his fingers with an unveiled threat as he turned to open the door and stalk back down the hall.

"Sir, yes, sir," Kenzie frowned before turning back to her work.

###

"Jamie, you have got to do better than that, c'mon! How are you ever going to get better? This is worse than trying to get Kaylin to eat her supper sometimes," Eddie vented in frustration after all attempts to get him to take more than a few bites of anything had obviously failed. "Do I need to try the airplane game?" she whined. "I thought you said you were evolved!"

"I'm just not hungry," he insisted, not knowing that nausea, and a decreased appetite were just a few of the other hidden short-term side effects of the drug he had been given earlier that day. "Maybe tomorrow," he offered as he pushed the tray away.

"Finish the yogurt at least," she demanded as she pushed it right back in front of him. "Or I'll tell a certain little girl that her Daddy is not behaving himself when I see her."

"Aw, Eddie… don't do that; I miss her," Jamie responded sadly as he lay back and gave up.

"I know you do… I'm so sorry," she frowned as she leaned in for a hug and a light kiss after pulling the tray away. "I didn't mean it that way. I wish we could have our phones and do a video chat with her or something, but that's apparently not allowed here," she griped in renewed disgust at the tight security measures instituted by that little strange man with the Mario mustache who had evidently invaded their lives for the near future.

"I don't…" he acknowledged with a shake of his head. "I don't want her to see me this way, Ed. I look like a monster with this effing thing on my leg. It'll scare her… she'll hide behind the couch again or have nightmares for months… just like before."

"Okay, now don't do that," she teared up, not wanting to tell him that their sensitive daughter had already taken to going back under the furniture at home without them, although Eva had conveniently left out the part about the door-slamming tantrum and comments Kaylin made about the baby when they had spoken earlier since the little girl had been distracted and happy in the middle of their cake baking exercise as Henry knew she would. "And _that's_ going to be gone soon," Eddie added with a deliberate nod towards the metal fixator that she had almost… _almost_ become accustomed to encircling her husband's leg whenever it was uncovered. "After Thursday we'll never have to see it again, right?"

"I doubt what's left will look any better," Jamie added dejectedly as he allowed for a moment of self pity while thinking about the inevitable scars that would remain if… and only if there was a leg left there to display them.

"That's not true, Jamie. You're going to get through this, I swear. Everything's not okay and perfect right now, but it will be. I believe it. Just a week and a half and you'll be with your sweetness again," Eddie promised in an effort to encourage him. "Every day is one day closer, okay? Now eat your yogurt, it's got calcium and protein," she added and shoved it back at him. "Open wide."

"You're relentless, you know that?" he acknowledged while shaking his head and conceding to his wife's demands by taking another spoonful.

"You've got that right," she huffed without realizing that Jamie would be seeing Kaylin very soon… but in his own nightmare instead of hers.

###

"Hey, c'mon… dinner wasn't that bad, was it?" Danny asked as he returned upstairs to their bedroom to find his wife weepy-eyed and propped up where he had left her dressed comfortably in her pajamas and silky housecoat after providing her meal on a tray in bed. "The boys ate it… more or less," he smirked. "Okay, so they reminded me about ten times that I'm not you and I admit I put a frozen pizza in the oven for them after we brought your plate up here."

"Danny, that was the worst lasagne I've ever had in my entire life," Linda laughed sadly as she played with the edges of the blanket. "Just as bad as Pop's burnt duck that time. Thank you for doing that though," she added with a small attempted smile when he reached in to give her a kiss. "It really means alot to me."

"Then what's all this?" he asked as he carefully slid onto the bed next to her and dried a tear on her cheek. "Is it hurting again? Maybe we should call and go back Monday…"

"No, it's not my back… that's feeling better as long as I don't try to move too fast or lift anything," she admitted. "It's just everything else," she offered while not revealing the truth about the situation and how this could very possibly be a shift in hormones talking since Danny would no doubt blow a major league gasket and it would be four more days before that could be determined or not. "I just really need you to stay with me for a while," she sniffed and reached for his hand. "I don't want you to go anywhere right now."

"Well, that's definitely not happening tonight, unless I get called in," he assured since an earlier call to the records department revealed that his friend was not scheduled to work until the next day so there was no urgency to return that mystery badge, especially in this weather. "But honey, on Monday I have work and I need see my brother before that," he admitted. "They're taking him back to the OR late afternoon for whatever's next which means he'll probably be messed up for a couple of days again. I need to see if he remembers anything about the accident yet."

"You won't give that up, will you?" she asked with a frown and shake of her head. "No matter what… even if you promised."

"I can't, Lin. It's something I have to do," he admitted with a sigh. "I want to be here with you too, but you know me. Please don't ask me not to do this… he's my brother… part of our family, it's important."

"And you want me to understand that right, Daniel Reagan? That this is just something you have to do no matter what?" she asked purposefully, intent on setting him up for a future discussion using the exact same logic if it became necessary in a few days time since she had no intention of turning back if indeed there was a path forward to another child, even if it put her own health and welfare in jeopardy.

"I know what I'm asking, Linda… but yes, that's what I need."

"Okay," she nodded. "I understand then," she admitted softly as he sighed in relief. "And I hope you can do the same," she added under her breath as he remained by her side at least for one more night as the darkness fell outside.

###

Night had come over the medical campus of Columbia as well, but instead of another Reagan couple spending time together, Eddie and Jamie were once again parted as in spite of Kenzie's allowance for her to spend the night if necessary, he had managed to convince her to return to the hotel to sleep more comfortably in a bed with the promise of doing the same himself on a negotiated lower dose of pain medication.

Alone in his room, Jamie grew more restless during his sleep as the hours went by. His distress culminated with a nightmare that had him moaning and crying out Eddie and Kaylin's names before waking with a start at 1:46, sweating profusely and clutching his stomach. Unable to get up, he desperately reached for an emesis basin on the nearby tray, but only managed to succeed in knocking the stainless steel bowl to the ground with a clatter before he was forced to grab his left side to cushion those broken ribs and he lost what was left of his pitiful supper off to the side on the covers. "Ah, DAMN IT!" he cried as a wave of crunching pain overcame him even and he blinked heavily as the lights in the room flicked on and William, one of the male floor nurses who was spelling Marguerite as she took a few hours to sleep during a double shift, came rushing in to check on him.

"Sergeant Reagan, just try to breathe easy and ride this through," he urged as he reached for a pillow for Jamie to clutch to his side to lessen the strain and picked up the basin off the floor.

"M'm sorry," Jamie gasped as he grabbed it while the nausea continued. By the time it was over he was exhausted and his gown and sheets were soaked through with sweat as he slumped back against the bed. "Think I'm done now," he admitted finally, unwilling to close his eyes again... afraid to even blink after that dream had left fear ripping through his heart which was still beating wildly and noted on the monitor.

"S'alright, no problem… don't worry about it. Happens all the time, man. Trust me, you can't show me much more than I've seen over the past ten years and I'm still here," William assured as he helped him settle back. "Try to take nice even breaths," he encouraged while he pulled off the top layer of soiled bedding and carefully balled it up. "Just let me run out and get a few supplies off the cart and we'll get the bed changed, and you fixed up in no time. You okay? I'll be back in just a minute," he added.

"I hate this," Jamie muttered. "Really hate it…" he emphasized with a frustrated roll of the eyes as he watched the man hurry out into the hall… forced to treat him again as if he were a helpless child. "Oh, God… my baby girl," he moaned again, still shaking as he recalled the terror of that dream once more.

He had been asleep alone in a hospital bed downstairs at the house on a winter's night only to wake up and feel a cold, icy draft tickling his bare back. Eddie was nowhere to be found and neither she nor Kaylin answered his calls for help. Concerned that the furnace was off he tried to get up, only to fall to the ground flat on his face with the realization that his right leg was no longer there to support him.

Undeterred, he crawled out into the living room army-style, dragging himself along with his elbows on the ground to find the front door wide open and snow drifting into the entryway. His heart clenched when he saw a single set of small footprints wandering out of the home, across the porch and down steps. Continuing his tiring efforts, he pulled himself out into the cold night… tumbling down the front stairs to the yard in a heap wearing only a hospital gown while screaming for Kaylin. He finally caught sight of her in the middle of the empty street in her cherished ducky footie jammies, clutching her blanket as she stood eerily still, staring forward while she was illuminated by the headlights of a blue '71 Chevelle idling a hundred feet away; its exhaust sending a curtain of smoke across the yard. Jamie had watched in horror, glued to the ground and unable to move, as the driver grinned while he gunned the motor and the car raced towards his helpless child… seemingly intent on mowing her down in cold blood… until at the last possible second…

He woke up.

Jamie's hands were still trembling as he covered his face and let out a sob. It had been so real, so vivid he could recall every last single detail of the scene, including the identity of the heartless bastard behind the wheel.

Joe. It was Joe.

He had witnessed his own beloved dead brother run down his precious, innocent daughter in the street with such cold calculation in the car that they had both poured their heart and souls into. Just as some crazy notion had made him imagine for a fraction of a second that it had been the sight of Joe at the wheel of the car that had left him frozen… motionless as it ran him down in the crosswalk in Washington and left him damaged forever in this pitiful helpless state. The memory of that moment had Jamie reaching for the basin again until he was dry heaving.

There would be no more sleep for him tonight without an uncharacteristic request for a heavy dose of medication which Marguerite dispensed with some worry when she was summoned from the call room. For once, Jamie gratefully drifted away from reality into the mind-numbing white fog as a now-familiar deep voice from just down the hall saw him out.

 _In my dark days and night  
It might've been just a dream  
In these dark days and night  
I'll be more than what you see  
In my dark there's a light  
It might've been just a dream  
In these dark days and night (Dark days and night)_

 _Oh when I was younger  
You told me I should get my shit together (People can dream)  
When I was younger  
So why your colors always bleed together_

 _People can dream_

* * *

 _That's our buddy Quincy with his encyclopedic musical knowledge offering his knowing input regarding traumatic flashbacks with a few lines from the group OneRepublic and their song "Dream" one of my current fav's. We'll discover later why he's prone to expressing himself like that. Next, an early morning call from Kaylin does nothing to ease his heart and reveals that Jamie's beloved little daughter is having trouble coping with things at home without her parents. A 'discussion' will ensue with Eddie, and he'll try determinedly to send her away before she puts him in his place after much angst._


	39. Chapter 39

Chapter 39

 _Well, I can't do too many of these because life has gotten hectic with work and family stuff, so not able to write and keep pace with more than a chapter or two a week, but since there's no new epi tonight, we'll do a Happy Blue Bloods is Renewed for Season 8 Friday bonus chapter just this one more time today. :)_

* * *

"D...a...d...d...y..." came the familiar pleading soft whisper over the phone as early morning light was filtering in the windows on Sunday morning, instantly driving Jamie fully awake after he had initially answered on autopilot due to the residual effects of his requested meds which had seen his mind stay thankfully quiet for the remainder of the night. Even though he was not completely clear, he silently thanked Marguerite for whatever they were because he found himself more lucid than he'd been ironically since this hellish nightmare had begun.

"Kaylin, oh, sweetie, thank goodness it's you," he replied with grateful relief to hear her voice even though a glance at the time showed it to be just before six. Surely her normally attentive, but obviously absent grandparents had not approved of a call to him this early, but he didn't really care at this point since he knew the precocious young one was adept at working that redial button on the phone and had obviously taken matters into her own little hands in an effort to speak to him. Still, he felt the need gently to address that behavior… he was her father after all, right?

"Why are we whispering?" he chided softly, knowing that she was trying to be sneaky and put one over on everyone. "Where are you?"

"By my couch," she answered truthfully, accidentally bumping on the speaker button and conveniently leaving out the fact that she was in a familiar spot behind the furniture once more although she wasn't going to get that past him so easily, no matter what state he was in right now. "Me miss you, Daddy," was added though in a quivering effort to smooth that disgression over. "P'ease... can I come s'eep in bed with you?"

"Kaylin Elizabeth," Jamie sighed as his heart fell, knowing exactly where she was now and that he was going to have to find a way of talking her out of the hiding spot from afar. "Baby, I love you so much and miss you too, but you know you're supposed to have a big person's permission to use the phone. Did Nagyanya or Pop Pop say it was okay to call me? Where are they? You can snuggle with one of them for today. Can they see you right now?"

"NO! THEY SAY ALWAYS NO!" the little girl cried loudly with unexpected volume and frustration, alerting said grandparents to the fact that she was no longer sleeping upstairs in her room... a quick bump of feet on the floor above signaled that Eva had heard the exchange from somewhere in the house and was now on her way. "ME WANT TO SEE YOU, DADDY! P'EASE!"

"Kaylin?" she called down the hall while opening the bedroom door. "Henry! Is she with you? She's not in her room!"

"No! She's not over here," he confirmed as he did the same. "Kaylin? Come here sweetie-pie! Where are you? Pop Pop is looking for you!"

"I WANT MY MOMMY AND DADDY!" came the now familiar reply back that gave away her location and had both now hurrying towards the stairs.

"Kaylin, it's okay, baby. Just go out and give them the phone and I'll tell them it's alright for you to talk to me…" Jamie tried calmly to diffuse her outburst and get her out in the open, honestly taken back by the sound of his daughter shouting defiantly like that, but he was unknowingly in for much more as the worst of a three-year-old tantrum was just beginning to brew.

"I WANT TO S'EEP WITH YOU! I go out in Mommy's car so she can come bring me!" Kaylin insisted with desperation while still clutching the phone and staying on that track before scurrying out from her hiding spot to run to the front door and tug on the latches, unlocking it even as her grandmother was quickly making her way down the steps.

"KAYLIN, NO! Get away from the door!" Eva shouted and just managed to grab her wrist to stop her when it surprisingly opened, setting off the house alarm as the little girl wriggled against her. "You mustn't do that! You're in your pajamas and it's dark and snowing outside!"

"OW! HURTS! NAGYANYA LET ME GO! I WANT MY DADDY!" she cried even as the phone slipped from her grasp and crashed to the ground, effectively disconnecting Jamie from the conversation as he lay in bed staring in disbelief at the receiver in his shaking hand and shocked by the turn of events that touched much too close to a still vivid dream that had his daughter running out of the house alone into the snowy street to stand in front of a blue car.

###

"Hal! Hey it's Danny Reagan," the seasoned detective greeted an old academy buddy over the phone while holding it to his ear with his shoulder as he stirred a big bowl of waffle batter, more in his element with that than Italian fare as he prepared breakfast for the family and hoped that his wife would be well enough to join them at the table.

"Reagan! Long time," Hal Weber acknowledged as he rolled back in the chair in his office at the records department in Personnel at 1PP. "What can I do for you? You call here by mistake? Want me to forward you up to Daddy in the big office upstairs? Heard he was camped out here all weekend. Roads aren't too bad now. I made it in. Hopefully the crews get the major lines cleared by tonight."

"Yeah, no… he just wanted to stay in the city closer to… work," Danny trailed off, second guessing any need to make Jamie's situation department scuttlebutt if his father had managed to keep a lid on it thus far. "You know how he is," he finished before moving on. "Hey, I got a favor to ask. I'm running down some leads on a case I've got going, but looks like maybe I'm not the only gold shield that caught it. All I got is a badge number somebody threw me though… not a name or a house. You mind running it so I can check in with this guy and make sure I'm not stepping on anyone else's turf?"

"Since when has that ever mattered to you?" Hal scoffed with a shake of his head. Danny Reagan had never been known for going through channels when his nose was on a case… not even in the academy, but there was a first time for everything he supposed. "Go ahead, what is it?" he asked.

"One sixty-five four three."

"Uh oh," his buddy reported with regret when a red caution box flashed across the screen after he typed in the number and hit enter. "Sorry to jam you up, bud, but it's flagged and locked," he reported. "Can't give you any info and I'm required to put in the name of the requesting officer."

"Terrific," Danny muttered with a roll of his eyes as he put the bowl down on the counter in frustration. This just hadn't been his week. _Figures I'd get snagged while trying to be a decent guy and keep another cop off the hook for losing his badge,_ he thought. "Go ahead. Who's gonna be calling me? IAB?" he asked, dreading another one of those investigations.

"Can't tell, but it went straight up to the Chief of D's," Hal reported. "Must be something major too since the record is sealed above my pay grade."

"Ah crap, alright," Danny sighed. "I'll be hearing about it later today then," he admitted since he planned on driving up to Columbia that afternoon to see Jamie if possible and knew Frank intended on doing the same just as soon as safe travel permitted it… surely if the name Reagan was flagged in that manner it would already be on his father's desk by then. "Thanks for nothing, Hal," he chided. "I'll buy you a beer at Maloney's next time I stop up that way."

"That's a deal," Weber agreed. "Hope your ass stays off the hook for this."

"Me too," Danny agreed as he went about his morning while wondering what was next.

###

"Hey, good morning, lambchop… did you sleep well?" an unsuspecting Eddie cheerfully greeted her husband upon her arrival after nine, bound and determined initially to offer a positive outlook on things since he had seemed pretty down the day before, and she knew these two upcoming surgeries were weighing heavily on both of their hearts. The strain on his face as she glanced over at him and the way he pointedly avoided looking back stopped her in her tracks, however.

"Jamie? What's wrong? Did something happen to you last night?"

"I… uh, no," he answered in a now familiar raspy, halting voice as his jaw clenched while he refused to meet her eyes since his inner frustration level had risen to the point it where was ready to boil over even as he first attempted to gloss over his own distress to no avail. "Not really, just a bad dream, stomach felt off... I got sick to it again before I could do anything. William had to come in and change everything," he did finally admit shamefully since it seemed wrong to be angry with her for withholding information while he was doing the same thing.

"Oh, no… I'm sorry, hon. But you're feeling better now, right? Jamie, you hardly ate anything again," she scolded with a frown as she focused back on his nutrition while looking at his still full breakfast tray. "The scrambled eggs are cold. Do you want me to see if I can warm them up down the hall? You really need the protein. There's a little microwave in the kitchenette… I can be back in a minute."

"No, I'm _not_ hungry, Ed!... Would you listen to me for once?!" he added a bit more forcibly while pushing the table further away to emphasize his point and she could tell his temper was up for some reason so continued to tread carefully. "Did you call your mother this morning?" he asked a bit coldly to redirect though as his gaze flicked over. The way he was reading her surely she didn't have any idea of what had just transpired, still he was irritated that she had kept any of that from him in the first place.

"My mother?" Eddie puzzled, wondering what Eva could possibly have to do with this striking shift from his normal demeanor even as her heart iced up a little with fear since she was sure now that in spite of her wish to downplay things while he was in such a rough patch their daughter's recent behavior had been found out. "No, I mean I tried earlier, but the line was busy and she didn't pick up her cell. Why? What happened? I figured you wanted to talk to Kaylin so we could do that together now."

"She called me by herself this morning," he continued evenly. "Early. Snuck downstairs alone and hid behind the couch. Did you know that, Ed?" he challenged. "She's been doing it again… and worse."

"Worse?" she questioned again while trying to imagine what he was talking about as she carefully sat on the edge of the bed trying get close to him without jostling anything and reached for his hand which was rebuffed at first. "What is it? I knew about the furniture," she admitted softly with a pained look radiating from her blue eyes aware of how much that behavior always upset Jamie since he had worked so tirelessly to win the little girl's trust and never failed to picture the terrible things she had seen with Jayne that drove her there whenever she was upset. "It started the first night when you got hurt. That was all my fault though… I fell apart in front of her and she got scared when she heard you were in a car accident because of what happened and that whole thing earlier in the day with the cat at the school and Bear, but Danny and Pop were able to coax her out, and then when we came back on Friday your Dad sat down with her and settled her when she was upset you weren't with us so that's why I didn't mention it. What was worse? Tell me!"

"She tried to get out of the house," he added as his voice hitched with fear he could not hide and he felt his breathing tighten even as he fought it in an effort to get this out. "Opened the front door and wanted to run out in the snow and get in the car and come see me… in the street, Ed. Your Mom had to grab her; she could have gone out there and wound up… like me or worse," he emphasized with a low groan and closed his eyes as that raw terror from that dream knifed through him again and his hand went to his empty stomach as it turned once more.

"Oh, no… don't, please don't do that," she cried and pulled him close while they both went pale as Eddie started to shake at the thought of their little girl being hurt. "Stop, please. I didn't know, Jamie… I should have brought her here with me. That was my mistake. I'm sorry, it's my fault… I never thought it would get this bad."

"It's not working out with your mom there," he insisted. "She yelled at her… I heard her, Ed. And for some reason now she's blaming the baby for me getting hurt and saying it's bad… I don't even know where that could have come from unless it was Eva. Kaylin can't handle this alone… it's too much like before. This is going to set her back, and we can't let that happen," he begged with desperation as he tried unsuccessfully to slow his breathing while the pain in his side flared.

"No, it's not going to. I promise," she tried to soothe before taking a deep breath and addressing the more hurtful aspect she had been afraid to reveal to him before. "The baby… I think that part is because of me too," she added, ashamed to admit just how much of this was on her own shoulders. "Jamie, do you remember anything about the accident yet?" she asked and then continued as he just shook his head somewhat in annoyance… no matter how hard he tried nothing had come back to him thus far except that now-recurring image of his brother Joe and the Chevelle that surely had nothing to do with this. "We were talking," she explained. "You were walking with Rick, and it was cold out so you asked me if you could call back in a few minutes when you got inside the hotel."

"I don't remember, Ed. I've tried, I really have, but I just don't," he sighed, already dreading his older brother's reaction to that same news. "Nothing that makes any sense anyway past being in Chairman Atwater's office that day and then going to some hotel for dinner. What does it matter?"

"We were talking about the baby… I was asking if you thought it might be my fault… what's wrong with munchie for not taking better care of myself. One second you were there telling me no, that there was nothing either of us could have done to cause it and laughing that odds were it was a boy… and the next second you were gone," she choked back a sob as her heart pounded while recalling the absolute fear that had gripped her just knowing in that instant that something bad had happened to him. "Kaylin overheard me say some things… I know I lost it in front of her while Pop was trying to calm me down. That's why… what this is about. I'm sure of it. Don't blame my mother… I thought Kaylin was okay when I left and Mom's had been trying really hard to help… she came all the way down from upstate as soon as she heard. Please don't be upset... Jamie, you need to focus on yourself right now. Of course things are mixed up for her with all this happening at once. She's just a little girl and confused, but I'll talk to her… to them both... I'll make it right and I don't want you to be stressing over this," she pleaded. "Not now… not when you have to be getting better. That's what we all need."

"No, she needs us… you," he corrected sadly. "I can't help her from here, Ed... If I could get up and walk there right now I swear to God I would. You have to go home and be with her… tonight," he emphasized as he set his jaw. "Final answer."

"Jamie, I can't be in two places at the same time and you need me too," Eddie closed her eyes and tried to control herself and stay calm against the panic welling up as she felt him trying to distance himself from her. Even though she knew this was all born of utter frustration and fear… that he would never purposefully do that with a clear head... since the moment it happened she could not help but feel that he should in some way blame her for this, and that he would eventually come to that realization himself and push her away. _Well that's not happening here,_ she resolved and steeled herself to go against him for his own good… _for better or worse, baby._

"You are my husband, and you're having surgery tomorrow," she replied as she reached over and took his hand firmly to emphasize her point. "I wasn't there the first time when all that stuff was going wrong, and read my lips, Jamison Reagan… there is no way in hell I am going to leave you alone for that again. How do you think I'd feel if I stayed away and something happened to you during that operation, huh? I already lived through that once!"

"This one is supposed to be 'no big deal'… an hour or so," he argued back and emphasized sarcastically with one handed air quotes since moving anything on his left side was still painful. "You need to go home and make things more normal for her again until I come back," he insisted again. "Go to work… you can't be missing all this time and still have a chance at that gold shield, please don't give up on that and see that Kaylin gets to preschool so she can be in her play."

"I don't care if Dr. Kenzie says this one is supposed to be all gumdrops and lollipops; she's sawing out a section of your hip. I'll be here. Kara is covering my shift at the desk and Dexter can go spin. I'm not gonna get a chance to work in the squad anyway since I was suspended last week, so I'm missing only one day. We'll find a way to deal with Kaylin. Let's talk to her right now together," she insisted as she picked up the controller.

"I already tried; she won't listen to me, and I'm scared, Ed," Jamie admitted as he finally gave in a little to the root of his feelings. "I don't think I can do this…" he whispered and motioned below with his hand. "Tomorrow and the next… and what comes after, staying here all that time. I know I can't if I'm worried about how much this is hurting her and you. Maybe it would have been better if… it was over with already," he added with hesitation and heavy regret in a defeated tone. "A week or two in the hospital instead and I could have been at home for the rest of it. If I had known all this… I don't know if it's worth it," he added while shaking his head. "What if it doesn't work?"

"You think I made the wrong choice for you? Jamie, is that what you're saying?" Eddie gasped in disbelief at the depth he had already fallen to as the tears fell at the turn of events she feared most was actually coming to life before her eyes… Was he really blaming her for putting him in this state even as she had been carrying the guilt with her from that decision all along too? "You'd rather have given up? I can't believe that's how you feel! Everyone said you would want the chance to get better! Don't," she begged as she kissed his forehead. "You can't, not now! Jamie, I know you can, and I'll do everything I can to help!"

"Then please… Eddie, don't cry, honey, I'm sorry, damn it," he tried to stop her and he cursed himself for being weak and saying that to hurt her as she wept against his shoulder. "God, that's not what I meant. I just have to be sure that you can handle things with me away and that she's safe or I can't do this… I won't," he reiterated as his glance flashed upwards. "And you don't need to see me like this all the time… helpless. I can't even do what I need to for myself," he closed his eyes, thinking of the humiliation of the day before. "I'm supposed to take care of you both."

"Jamie, you need help right now, but that does not make you helpless!" she tried to assure even as she worried over what to do about the obvious depressed state he was in.

"I don't want everyone wrecking their lives for me, all because I did something stupid!"

"But you _are_ my life," Eddie reminded. "I don't want to be away from you either!"

"And she's our daughter… we have to put her and the baby first, don't we? I'm the adult… she's the child and you're carrying another, right?" he challenged her, almost daring her to knock him down to level footing with a three-year-old or below… that's what this whole situation felt like as he was required to rely on someone else to take care of his most basic needs. "So, if that's the case then I'm the one that should be getting the phone calls while I'm away, not her… not sweetness, she doesn't understand, and you need to take care of you too. This is too much stress while you're pregnant. We have to find a way to balance it, Ed… we can't be like this. If something would happen to Kaylin, you or the baby because of me I'd never forgive myself."

"Balance? That's what you want? Then I can do both… I have to. I'll go home tonight and be with her, and tomorrow I'll be back for you, okay? We can make this work better, but you are not pushing me away like that," Eddie's voice flared up with stubborn resolve. "You get pre-op around three after respiratory and physical therapy in the morning," she ticked off and forced him to face what was coming. "I'll be here before lunchtime."

"Therapy is a joke… I can't take one effing deep breath to blow into that stupid thing and all they do is stretch out my good leg and arm. It's not like anyone can do anything with _that,"_ he grimaced at the now familiar metal companion adorning his right leg. "I don't even know why they're bothering, and besides I can't eat then either so you can leave the airplane in the hangar," he rolled his eyes and snapped back sarcastically. "I'll probably be doped up the rest of the night again. It's not worth it to sit here. Stay home tomorrow and be with Kaylin, she needs you. Prove to me you can do this too. You said we have to let other people help… that works both ways. We'll be together today until later, okay? Then Dad said he'd be by this afternoon and he'll take you home. That's enough, it has to be for now. Please do this for me while I can't… I need you to take care of our family, Eddie."

"I _am_ taking care of my family, Jamie, and you are too worth it," she softened and held him as close as she dared although at a loss on how to convince him of that. "Don't ever think you're not. I'll do a better job and take care of things at home, I swear, but I'm not leaving you alone no matter what you say, and you have to promise not to give up on yourself. Okay?" she prodded even though she felt him reluctantly shake his head which was not the response she was hoping for.

"I love you, Jamison Reagan, and we're going to get through this together… all of us."

* * *

 _Well, our lovebirds are facing a tough week and Jamie is obviously not dealing well with some of the emotional reactions to his trauma… shock, disbelief, grief, irritability, feelings of helplessness and denial… none of which are about to be helped by an encounter with an older brother that leaves our injured hero more agitated and depressed than before… a state that will render him vulnerable to a pair of nosy, but good-willed fellow patients who will finally get their first opportunity to check in on the new boot personally in the chapter after that._


	40. Chapter 40

Chapter 40

"Eddie! Hey! Wait a second! Is he down this way?" Danny hurried over from the elevator late that afternoon having spotted her in the hallway coming back from the ladies room before begrudgingly pausing to show his visitor's pass and turn over his phone to the security guard at the central desk. "Come on man, what's it gonna take… another strip search?" he growled before being permitted to continue around the corner to join her while nodding to Detective Nucifero whose presence seated in the lobby could only mean that his father had already arrived.

"You made it," Eddie greeted him with a tired half smile that did not meet her eyes. "Wasn't sure if you'd be able to between Linda and the snow," she acknowledged softly. "How's she feeling?"

"Yeah, she's doing a lot better, and the drive wasn't too bad… I got here at least. Took me forever to get through downstairs though. What's with that? It's gotta be easier to break out of Riker's than to get on this damn floor. Is everything okay? You look kinda down," he worried.

"I was told to take a break and go back to the hotel to pack," she responded with a frown. "I just put all my stuff in the SUV. We're leaving soon. Jamie's not having a great day. He's frustrated with being immobile and he's been more awake so everything's kind of hitting him now, plus Kaylin's upset so I'm going home tonight."

"He's kicking you out?"

"No, he _thinks_ he's kicking me out. Your Dad's been in there trying to talk some sense into him for the last hour or so. I'll be driving back up tomorrow morning."

"Good luck with that. Oh, that reminds me… here's your key," Danny offered as he pulled the fob from his pocket. "I forgot to leave it at the house when I dropped the car off the other day on the way home from St. Vic's with Linda. It's working fine now. Listen, the mechanic found a short in the circuit with the phone charger on it," he explained while they turned and started walking down the hall towards the surgical ward. "You, or um, Jamie, he didn't take it in for a recall to some cut rate shop did you? The guy said whoever did the work screwed it up."

"What are you talking about, Danny? We only had it in a few times to the dealership. It's under warranty… why would we go somewhere else? Did he charge you for it?"

"Yeah, it was like two-twenty; I covered it and put the bill in the visor," he added thoughtfully chewing his lip, promising to follow up with their regular mechanic to see what had gone wrong.

"Well, that's great. He probably saw the out of state plates and just told you that to make you pay for it before he turned around and submitted it to the company for more money. Don't worry about it, I'll give you a check right now and figure that out later, but please don't bring it up when you see Jamie," Eddie warned as they neared his room. "I kind of left out that whole situation on the drive down too. He hates that car, and he's not so happy with me today for withholding information like that," she admitted quietly before walking past Quincy's room with a nod to their neighbor and in through the doorway where Frank was busy flipping through the news channels trying without success to distract his youngest with the frozen state of the city.

"Look who I found wandering the halls," she greeted the two while leading Danny into the room. "Thought the security guy was gonna have to call for backup when he tried to take his phone though."

"Well, if it isn't my son, _Detective_ Daniel Reagan," Frank remarked with emphasis as he lifted his eyebrows while leaving little doubt a certain topic had come to light at 1PP before his departure. "Your name came up with Chief Piedmont today, just for the record. I'm glad you could join us."

"Hey, kid…" Danny frowned and nervously cleared his throat as he focused on Jamie and pointedly ignored his father, determined to let the situation with the found badge stay under the radar for as long as possible since he had the distinct impression from that look and tone that he was destined for an unofficial dressing down on procedure, although he had no idea where that information was about to lead him. "Good to see you awake for a change. Nicer digs here than the last place you were at," he admitted although the sight of Quincy next door had his stomach turning more than his own brother's state for some reason. "But you need to get the old man to put the Jets-9ers game up on the flat screen," the older brother tried to hearten as he walked in although he could see there was very little humor apparent in his younger sibling's attitude, and having been removed from the situation for a few days, he instantly noticed that there was an already obvious amount of weight loss in the increasingly gaunt features which was worrisome since his brother had always tended to forget about food whenever something stressful occurred to him.

"They're losing… twenty-four nothing in the second quarter," Jamie sighed as he pushed himself up with a grimace. "Couldn't watch anymore… too painful," he at least attempted to joke.

"I heard they got a field goal on the way in; they've still gotta chance," Danny smirked. "Comeback time."

"The Giants won today," Eddie observed with satisfaction now that her husband's mood had lightened just a bit and she joined the small talk, always prepared to offer a little dig of her own whenever the Reagans had the occasion to bleed the green of disappointment with the family team.

"That will be enough, Miss Janko," Frank warned before his mustache twitched upwards. "We're not fair weather fans… there's always next year."

"Good thing too," Danny agreed as he walked across the room to get his bearings and looked out of the window at the snowy expanse. "Wish I was in sunny San Francisco watching the game though instead of the great white north. Getting old… my back's killing me after all that shoveling," he moaned with a stretch.

"Mine too," Jamie admitted, feeling increasingly uncomfortable but unwilling to medicate and get tipsy with an audience in the room once more.

"Yeah, well if I were you I'd just hit that button and put myself into la la land," his older brother advised. "Between you and Linda this weekend… I don't know who's worse about not taking that stuff. She's finally doing a little better," he explained to a trio of worried eyes that locked on him. "Whatever they gave her for it didn't really work anyway, but she can at least get up and move now… I'd go bat crazy being stuck on the couch like that for two days," he added and then instantly regretted it as he watched his younger brother frown and struggle to readjust again. "Sorry, kid," he offered apologetically knowing Jamie was feeling the same and looking at a much longer confinement.

"Whatever, Dan," Jamie sighed irritably, and was just about to concede and put in a call to the desk for some assistance when the new night nurse arrived at the doorway with William back in tow.

"You'll have to excuse us for a bit," Janet Evans, the capable charge nurse advised with a smile. "We need to change some dressings and get Sergeant Reagan settled and comfortable before dinner. You can wait in the lounge down the hall if you don't mind," she added firmly, effectively intending to kick them out of the room while they went about their ministrations.

"Why don't the two of you get going then?" Jamie prodded with a direct, challenging look at Eddie. "Kaylin's waiting for you."

"Jamie," she sighed at the day-long contentious mood he was in, not that she could really blame him.

"I'll sit and visit with sunshine here for a bit if you want to get home," Danny offered quickly to his father and sister-in-law while jumping on the opportunity to interrogate his little brother about his recall from the accident in their absence.

"Someone mentioned dinner, so of course you would stay," Jamie griped. "Let me save you the trouble, you can have it. I'm not hungry."

"That's a negative," Janet chirped in while pulling her computer cart over and leaning down to search the drawers for needed supplies. "I'm under strict orders from Marguerite and Dr. Kenzie to see that you get some calories in tonight. We'll give you an early breakfast too," she advised. "You're allowed to eat before eight in the morning since you won't be in the OR until four. Just so you know if you don't cooperate, we do have other methods," she warned suggestively while standing back up and twirling a bit of plastic gastric tubing between her fingers. "I don't recommend them, but we don't want you taking a metabolic nosedive when you have a busy day tomorrow. Now if you'll excuse us," she added firmly and shooshed the rest of the Reagans out of the room before closing the door behind them.

"Geez, these people don't mess around," Danny griped as he found himself unceremoniously put out in the hall with Eddie and his father while still wearing his coat. "I just got here."

"Welcome to my world," Eddie acknowledged sadly as she led them down to the lounge. "Although most of the staff here is pretty nice," she conceded with affection for Marguerite while allowing her distaste for that strange little Oliver Wendell man who appeared to have vanished as quickly as he had arrived the day before and her continuing distrust for Kenzie which was mired in those doubts rooted by those two nurses at the hospital in Washington. "You want anything? The decaf tea is pretty good. I've been drinking tons of it."

"Eddie, how are you holding up?" Frank worried over his obviously stressed daughter-in-law now that they were finally both out of his son's earshot. "Maybe Jamie has a point about you needing to take a break. Erin said she is clear tomorrow after lunch. She can sit with him before surgery so you can get some rest."

"No, she's welcome to come, but I've gotta be here," she replied softly. "He's really depressed and trying to push me away, Frank. I won't let him. He's not eating right. He told me before that maybe it would have been better if that other doctor had, you know…" she paused with a sniff as her eyes welled up. "Excuse me, I need to use the ladies room again… all this tea," she covered while the emotion caught in her throat once more before hurrying back down the hall to have another good private cry instead.

"Terrific, that's all we need… for her to be upset like that and the kid to give up on himself now," Danny growled his displeasure.

"Jamie is trying to put everyone's needs in front of his own like he usually does," Frank observed. "It's just hard for him to admit right now how much help this whole situation requires. I'm sure once he's able to move around a bit more and do something for himself again he'll start to come around," he attempted to assure his oldest while at the same time facing the same fear that his son's life had indeed been irreparably changed in that one instant. "So what's with the call I received from Chief Piedmont," he deflected to another topic since his own heart was saddened with the current state of things. "Why are you looking into Detective Altemose out of the 2-7?"

"Who?" Danny puzzled while his father frowned. "I wasn't looking into anyone, Dad," he continued before reaching into his jacket pocket to pull out the somewhat tattered leather fold containing the badge. "Sean picked this up on the sidewalk in front of the house yesterday…. someone on the street probably thought I dropped it. I just wanted to get it back to the guy before he got jammed up over losing his shield."

"So you were going to ignore proper procedure," Frank sighed as his eyebrows raised and his brow wrinkled. "My son."

"Yeah, I know. I screwed up again. Sorry about that, but what's the big deal with this guy?" Danny asked, his curiosity piqued. "Straight to the Chief and up to the PC?"

"That's need to know, which you don't," his father replied while sitting back and frowning. "Not to leave this room, but he's already jammed up under investigation for corruption," was all he would add to that and Danny knew better than to pry any further into that deep dark NYPD hole. "Piedmont is expecting you in his office first thing in the morning for a debriefing."

"Seriously? I have to schlep all the way to 1PP so I can tell him the truth… that my kid found it laying in the gutter?" Danny griped. "C'mon, Dad, I got cases to work after being out last week… all right, I'll be there with bells on," he surrendered as he saw his father's face set. "I was just checking on a number," he tried to minimize his involvement just as Eddie turned the corner to join them again, having buttoned up her emotions tightly once more.

"What's just a number?" she queried as she slid into a seat at the table with them. "Is it something about Jamie? Did the nurse come back out?" she asked with a glance towards his door and continued hypervigilance.

"Oh, no, sweetheart… it's nothing like that," Frank assured without filling her in on the important details. "Something Danny brought up from work. Just thinking that 16543 maybe one of those bad luck combinations that should be retired permanently," he mused as his son's ears perked up, remembering a recent discussion over Joe's badge when the same number had been requested by a female officer at the 12th to honor her deceased father, resulting in an affirmative family vote on the matter. A search by Frank had revealed a number of officers with that numerical sequence had died in the line of duty in every way imaginable from being shot in the chest like his brother to being hit by a bus on a rookie tour.

"Why is that?" Danny asked. "Who had it before?"

"Jumped out when I read the report that Weber forwarded up the chain," Frank revealed with almost instant regret for bringing it up. "Gonsalves, Lydia. Resigned with it in 2009 before it was reassigned to Altemose. She reported the original shield was missing when she put in her papers… carried a dupe for the last six months or so of her career. It should have never been put back in service in the first place."

"Gonsalves?" The beat of a particular first grade detective's heart skipped again at another one of those odd happenstances that had occurred much too often in the past few days as he recalled a direct connection to the Blue Templar, but it was not his voice asking the question.

"That's weird," Eddie continued as she jumped back to her feet after noticing the door to Jamie's room opening as the two nurses exited and waved them back over to join him. "Gonsalves was the last name on the tag from the dead cat that got hit by the car at Kaylin's school… the number was disconnected when we tried to call the family about it," she added before leaving with one final thought. "I wonder what the odds of hearing that come up twice in the same week are?"

###

"Are you freaking serious? What are the odds?!" Danny lamented as he stared slack jawed at the sports center report on the screen showing that three fourth quarter touchdowns and a two-point play in the waning seconds of the game had resulted in one of the greatest nail biting come-from-behind victories in recent New York gridiron history. "The Jets made a comeback like that and we missed it?" he added in disbelief while sinking back in the bedside chair. "Of course, no phones… cut off from all contact here. Son of a bitch!"

"Sorry," Jamie commiserated even though he was still annoyed that his brother had remained present for the evening in spite of earlier protests. "Shoulda gone home with Dad and Eddie… you could have maybe caught the last quarter."

"I could have watched it here in high def if you would have left me, numbnuts!" Danny grumped as he turned the screen off in disgust.

"I didn't ask for another babysitter," Jamie sniped back. "Got enough of them as it is," he added with a nod towards the door and the nurse's desk where eagle-eyed Janet had been sure to keep him in her direct line of sight until she was satisfied he had successfully finished the majority of his evening meal.

"I'm not here to babysit," Danny insisted with a scowl. "I'm just here to keep you company and see how you're doing, but, and I'm sayin' it with love bro... you're being a real jackass to everyone today."

"Gee, thanks."

"Look, I get it… I swear. I know it's tough what you're going through… I've seen it before with a lot of guys in my unit, but taking it out on your family and pushing us away, especially Eddie, that isn't the answer, kid."

"Don't try to shrink me, Danny… you're the one that doesn't have an idea this time. Come talk to me when you've put your wife and kids through something so bad that she can't even look at you without crying… how would you feel if you let Linda down that way? I see that and it just makes me sick to my stomach."

"I do know what that's like… I really do, unfortunately," Danny admitted quietly, thinking of the very real and current situation with the love of his life which had seen her only tearfully agree to let him leave that afternoon. "I've done that and worse, but c'mon you know how this stuff goes… stress, fear and anger happen after something like this. You and Rick did all that outreach to combat trauma survivors..." he started, having tried to assure his sister-in-law of the same thing before she left, hoping she would be less upset and better able to handle her husband's uncharacteristic outbursts.

"Oh, so now I knew what the hell I was talking about before?" Jamie bristled in renewed anger as he wiped a hand across his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose hard. "Thought I was just the ivy-league peace, love and happiness freaking fragile liberal flag-burning baby of the family who never wore a uniform and didn't have a clue! Now I'm some kinda expert because I got myself hurt?! Well, turns out you were right all along! I never knew what this was really like… to have everything taken away from your family in a second and worry about who will provide for them the rest of your life. You want to know what else you were right about?" Jamie started to shake involuntarily with the emotion he had been fighting to hold back all day as his mind flashed once more on those confusing seconds before he was struck down in the street.

"Hey… now don't get upset, kid… calm down, I didn't mean it like that..."

"No, you said it just last week when we were fighting about what went down in that bodega with Marcus… about what doesn't keep guys alive. You were right! I HESITATED!" Jamie admitted with strain evident in his expression as he fought the painful tension in his ribs once more. "I SAW THE DAMN CAR AND I HESITATED! I had time to get out of the way and I didn't!"

"Wait, you remember the accident now?!" Danny gasped, having looked for the opportunity to bring this up since his arrival, but his brother had looked so… well, absolutely beat down and puddled this whole time for once he didn't have the heart to add to it. "What was it? Make? Model? Did you see the driver or get a plate?" he pried excitedly, thinking only about that camera footage their forensics buddy, Mike Becker, may or might not find on that old hard drive he intended on dropping off after his morning visit to 1PP to explain the badge the next day. "C'mon, this is the break we needed! I knew that great big brain of yours would give us a lead! Why didn't you tell me before?"

"I don't, Dan… I don't know," Jamie shook his head and put it back up against the pillow to stare at the ceiling. "What I see DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE!" he admitted emotionally and Danny could see from the monitor that his brother's stress level was rising once more. "I thought… I don't know why… I still see Joe and the Chevelle… I just remember standing there and letting it happen now. Why did I do that, Danny? WHY?! All I had to do was step to the side, but I froze and ruined everything… I can't stop thinking about it. I let Eddie, Kaylin and the baby down when they needed me the most..."

"Oh, no... damn, kid..." Danny tried unsuccessfully to control the look of disappointment on his face even though it remained evident and he could see from the corner of his eye that Janet was getting out of her seat to hurry across the hall and see what was going on. "Hey, don't go down that road. You're gonna get through this," he added even while clearly reading the doubt on his brother's face. "And I'm going to get the bastard that did it to you, I promise. You don't have to worry about it anymore. I'm sorry for pushing you to remember. There's other evidence I picked up in DC… I'm dropping it off with Mike tomorrow. You'll see… as soon as we get this guy, you'll feel better…"

"I can't… I _don't_ even care about that anymore," Jamie gritted his teeth and hissed. "I'm so messed up on all this crap all I keep seeing is stuff from the past running through my head… Sonny's face, Joe, the car… people from back then… the FBI guy that worked with him… Sisco... he came with Anderson that one night when I was a rookie to try to get me to go undercover with them. Like where the hell did that come from?!" he demanded. "I haven't thought about him in years, so why now? That's what I see when I close my eyes anymore… and I don't understand!"

"Wait, Malevsky and the FBI? One of the guys that worked with Joe on the Templar?" Danny's brow furrowed and a cold chill went down his back upon that revelation. What were the odds of Jamie making mention of that on the same day the link to Lydia Gonsalves' name came up twice in strange fashion and just hours after her old badge showed up on his doorstep… the dead cat that got run over by a... _car…_

"Crap," he mouthed in shock under his breath, still unable to make head or tails out of this mess of seemingly unrelated occurrences.

"Detective Reagan?" Janet interrupted him while she entered and glanced at the monitor. "Is there an issue? It's very important that we keep your brother's blood pressure under control and it looks like that might be creeping up again," she advised even as she hit the button to have the automatic cuff take another reading. "I think it's time for you boys to call it a night so he can get some rest for tomorrow," she advised in a no nonsense voice that had a distinct ring of Grandma Betty in it.

"Yeah, okay… sorry. I didn't mean to work him up, we just got a little excited about the Jets game… lifelong fans you know. Don't get many opportunities like that," Danny tried to deflect away from the true topics affecting his brother's obviously mentally stressed state even as he shot a worried glance back at Jamie who had tuned everyone else out and shut his eyes once more.

"I'm sure… partial to the Patriots myself... God bless Tom Brady and the red white and blue," Janet advised as she released the air pressure with a frown. "And this is a little too high so visiting hours are definitely over for today," she added with authority. "I'll be right back with William as soon as I take care of that, and we'll get you settled for the night," she added before leaving briefly when she heard one of Quincy's medication alarms go off.

"Oh, cripes. Guess that's my cue to leave, kid, before the MP's come and drag me away," Danny replied as he reached over and grabbed his coat before walking back over to the bed and bumping Jamie's good leg to get his attention as a pair of defeated hazel eyes opened to regard him. "You take care. I'll be back later this week… You're gonna do fine tomorrow, and I think Erin's coming then. Listen, I'm sorry for bringing that stuff up and getting you upset again," he apologized with regret for his words the previous week which his brother was obviously holding against himself. "Don't worry about that, just… um, get better, okay? All that from before… sometimes, I mean I've seen guys flashback on all kinds of weird shit when things like this happen, but I didn't mean that other stuff about what I said with Marcus… that was just me shooting off my big mouth like usual. You ought to know that by now, if you want to hang on something I told you, remember this," he paused. "When you're going through something big…"

"Don't go looking for anything bigger," Jamie finished for him sadly and gave him a weak fist pump to say goodbye. "I'm trying, Dan, I really am, but right now it doesn't look like I'm in the position do that, anyway," he added with a frown and was still trying to push those thoughts away after his brother left when a single chime from the phone rang through and gave him a reason for a moment of relief and something to sustain him for the night.

Eddie was home with Kaylin and safe.

* * *

 _Well, the coincidences are continuing to pile up for Danny, and poor Jamie is offering the truth about what happened, although no one, not even he can believe that it's for real. Next, Quincy and Commander Rigsby make their first of many memorable nighttime visits to a certain broken sergeant, while on the other side of town a little mommy-and-me time is had between three generations as Eddie attempts to settle her daughter before discovering her parents had accidentally become reacquainted and Eva spilled the beans about... well, the little now "lime"-a-bean at this stage._


	41. Chapter 41

Chapter 41

"Mommy! Mommy! Me miss you!" Kaylin cried as she bounded over and latched herself onto Eddie's leg the moment the front door opened. "P'ease, up! I hug you!" she danced in happiness at the notion of getting one of her parents back for the time being at least.

"Hi, baby… Oh, my goodness I missed you too, sweetie," Eddie assured as she reached down to pick up and snuggle the girl only to find herself gripped around the neck with little arms in a near chokehold. "Kay, that's a little tight there, pumpkin… be gentle, please," she urged, a little taken back by the reaction and wondering now how they were going to temper her approach to Jamie once she was able to see her father.

"Hey, how about sharing some of that sweetness with your old grandpa?" Frank huffed with a smile as he reached for her after following his daughter-in-law inside and closing the door behind them, but Kaylin was not going to be pried off her mother that easily.

"No! I want my _Mommy!"_ she insisted as she turned away from him and buried her face in Eddie's long golden tresses.

"Humph, welcome to the second string, Francis," Henry observed.

"Kaylin, édesem… sweetheart, your mother is tired, and she just came home. Let her take her coat off to sit down on the couch and rest, kicsi," Eva chided gently, although to be honest she was greatly relieved herself to see that Eddie was able to tend to her own daughter as it had been a challenging day for the recently minted grandmother who had struggled to keep the unusually irritable little girl occupied and under control.

"Your mother is right… you should sit down and let me fix you something to eat," Henry insisted as he moved into the kitchen. "Francis, you too… I know you were both just living on takeout and cafeteria food for the last however many days. There's good Irish beef stew in the kitchen I can warm back up and Eva's cake for dessert. We just finished supper."

"It's okay, Mom, and I'm fine, Pop," Eddie assured as she quickly went about a few things like plugging in her phone after pausing to send that single ring signal to her husband to confirm that she was at home before checking the messages on the answering machine with Kaylin glued to her shoulder. As soon as that was done, she shifted her down to her lap and purposefully ignored the fact that the little girl's thumb slipped into her mouth in one of her habitual high insecurity tells even though she noticed her mother's expected frown as she observed it after the two of them gratefully settled down in the living room with everyone else.

"So, how are things?" Henry questioned as he sought answers about his grandson directly from the source without revealing too much for the young precocious ears present.

"Today was a tough day," Frank answered honestly. "He's adjusting, but it's a lot to accept, Pop. Danny was going to stay with him for a bit tonight. Erin will be there tomorrow. We'll all have to do our best get him through this week, and then I think things will start to get better."

"But the surgery is still on as scheduled, right?" Henry asked with a frown, anxious to see to it that Jamie got his treatments so he could come home as soon as possible while still perturbed at the fact that he had been denied access and plotting another trip up on his own to visit him. Perhaps he'd have to look into that Uber-Boober thing they'd discussed before, he grumbled to himself. "I need to see him too. I'll be there Tuesday while everyone else is at work, and they better pass me at the door this time or there will be hell to pay. I've got rights too."

"He's going in around four o'clock tomorrow afternoon," Eddie confirmed. "Dr. Kenzie said this one should only take about an hour or so though," she added optimistically. "And they won't have to put him under for too long so he'll probably be awake before I have to come home."

"Daddy s'eepy 'gain?" Kaylin asked even as she herself was quickly relaxing into that state in her mother's arms while being rocked on autopilot in the comfortable recliner after a few days of stressful intermittent sleep and naps had taken their toll and left a grumpy, intractable toddler in their wake.

"Tomorrow he will be, baby, but it's okay because the doctor is making him better," Eddie assured with another hug and a kiss as she was likewise finding having her daughter so close to be cathartic after a week of pure, unrelenting stress.

"Can she 'urry so him can come home to see me?" Kaylin wondered before innocently dropping another nuclear-grade bomb that would serve to rock Eddie's world yet again. "Me miss 'im. I hear Nagyanya say hello to tvoj tata… your daddy, Papa Armin; him call on phone, too… him make you sad when he's 'way?" she tried to understand what in her mind was a similar situation between Jamie and a grandfather she had never met before.

"DADDY!" Eddie gasped as her eyes went wide and she looked over at Eva in shock and then towards Henry to gauge what her mother's reaction had been as Frank's eyebrows likewise raised and he and his father exchanged a series of quick, revealing expressions from across the room. "We were supposed to visit him today to tell him about the...! OH, NO!" she slapped her hand across her face as the consequences of that oversight hit her. "I forgot all about it! He called here instead?! And you accepted it?! WHY?"

"Yesterday, Edit," Eva corrected evenly while her face remained flat and emotionless. "The weather... he would have worried for you," she added succinctly to account for her actions while offering only a few additional clues as to the content of that conversation. "I explained about Jamison..." she trailed off.

"And what else?!" Eddie demanded as the words caught in her throat. "Anya, you _didn't,_ did you? Please tell me you didn't say anything about the…?"

"Beba… yes, perhaps... I might have mentioned it," Eva admitted while subconsciously ducking with a slight grimacing break in her stony countenance as some regret and trepidation awaited her daughter's reaction.

"YOU?! You talked to Daddy over the phone about the beba… _my_ baby, and let me guess, he knows that he was the last one to hear about it, right?" Eddie strained to clarify as she went pale at the assumptions she made about her parents confronting each other like that while fighting desperately to maintain control over the volume of her voice considering the sensitive and already overwhelmed little girl in her arms who was just drifting off into a much-needed secure sleep while clutching her and still holding her thumb in her mouth. "Well, of course I'm sure he does now," she hissed with a deadly cold inflection. "You would have made certain of that, right, Mom? Because we can't just all be happy about it. He'll think I was keeping it from him on purpose… that I was ashamed to tell him, and I'm not able to call him back and explain."

"The baby is bad… hurt Daddy," Kaylin murmured in agreement on autopilot even as she snuggled closer.

"Sweetie, please don't say that, we told you it's not true," Eddie whispered. After everything that had happened the now-recurring little nugget of pre-sibling rivalry was not even a blip on her radar at this point while she closed her eyes and put her head back and swore under her breath, rocking the chair harder searching for words before realizing there were none right now and giving up. "And Jamie will… I mean when he hears about this… he'll just… I can't even… I need to go upstairs to lay down right now and not talk about it," she stuttered out while grabbing her phone off the charger in case there was a call from the hospital before hurrying up the steps holding Kaylin and shaking her head in disbelief at this new sucking hole in the raw cavernous pit of emotions she currently had brewing.

"I do realize," Eva admitted to Frank and Henry in the strained silence that remained after her daughter's abrupt departure. "Ez hiba volt… it was a mistake I should not have done now, but I will explain to her later when she is able to hear me that her father and I have put things in the past and it is not how she thinks. I believe I will retire for the evening as well. Henry, I'm sure you prefer to stay at your home and I will need my room back tonight," she admitted while taking great care herself to maintain decorum before quietly taking her leave from the men and following her daughter up the steps. "The two of you will please show yourselves out."

For a few moments the only sound evident in the house was that of Bear's undisturbed, throaty purring as he lay comfortably outstretched on the couch between the pair of shocked Reagan patriarchs who never once imagined that an encounter like that could go down in such a hushed fashion between the hot-blooded mother and daughter pair.

"It's true what they say you know… you never hear the bullet coming that gets you," Henry finally broke. "Your mother, if she ever went quiet like that…" he paused to shake his head and shudder as he remembered a few instances when that had occurred in his long, mostly happily married life before finishing. "Those Rileys were ticking time bombs whenever they held something like that in. Anyway, I knew when to wear my tac vest to bed. Maybe one of us should stay here or at least grab Eddie's off-duty piece before we go."

"I'm sure she will… express herself... and they will work it out together later when they're alone. It's their family business, not ours," Frank finally coughed out before continuing, having no desire to be present for that second, or was it third Janko showdown? "So, Armin and Eva... talking together for the first time in years… about a grandchild he wasn't told about… on a collect call from prison… here in this house," he summed up while nodding in rhythm at what had to be the uncomfortable nature of that after another long moment of silence followed the sound of a door closing firmly above. "And you decided to leave that out of the sitrep, Pop?!" he demanded now that he was assured they had privacy. "What did they say to each other?"

"I don't know, Francis… it was sort of a one-way conversation and my Serbian is a little rusty," Henry deadpanned. "Safe bet though we won't ever have to worry about setting places for both of them together at the Sunday dinner table unless "prokletstvo" means "I love you, honey,"... but, well… I'm pretty sure that's not the case given the circumstances," he admitted before getting up. "C'mon, you're right. It's time to go home. We shouldn't be here right now."

###

"Danny, what are you doing here? I thought you were staying later and get those feet away from me, you're like an icicle!" Linda griped as she pulled away when her husband joined her under the covers in their bed at home. "Was everything okay with Jamie?" she asked with a frown at his early appearance which knowing him so well couldn't mean anything good.

"It was until I riled him up a little and they kicked me out," he answered honestly with regret at that situation. "He's not handling things too well, and I pushed him too hard about the accident again… he said he remembered and I thought it would help with the investigation. Turns out he's just as messed up as ever," he explained with a sigh and rolled over on his back before confiding in her. "Still thinks it was Joe that ran him down in the Chevelle."

"He what?!" Linda gasped as her face reflected confusion at first. "Oh, Danny… then pressuring him isn't gonna help. It sounds like he honestly doesn't remember and his mind is just trying to fill in the gaps. You gotta leave this go. The last thing he needs is to be stressed over that right now."

"Yeah, I guess," he conceded outwardly even though his gut had been churning over all the seemingly unrelated ties to the past that had been popping up since the start of this.

"You won't though," his wife sighed as she knew his stubborn Irish propensity for hanging on to things like a bulldog on a steak bone.

"No, but I'll back off of him for a while," Danny admitted. "I got other leads… have to drop that stuff off at forensics tomorrow and meet with Piedmont at 1PP over that badge Sean found. You gonna be okay here by yourself?" he wondered as he turned to his side to judge her reaction and then followed up with part two after she nodded yes. "Listen, I didn't bring this up before, but Dad asked if you could go up to Columbia and meet with this doctor sometime later this week. He thinks it would be good for Jamie to be able to come home on the weekends after the surgeries and he'll need someone to change the bandages and give him some meds… stuff like that. I guess 'cause he's in this study you've gotta get approved to do that. He's having Addison go too."

"Eddie's gonna let Addison… Addison Greene in the house to take care of Jamie?" Linda raised her eyebrows knowing that her current sister-in-law still held a little jealousy for her husband's onetime ex-girlfriend and rival. "Can't really see that happening, but when?" she asked while considering that she might have her own bombshell to drop later in the week after a little test she was planning on taking on…

"Wednesday morning," Danny finished the thought for her. "I'll come with," he offered. "We'll drive up together to see the kid before he has the longer surgery the next day. I know if you're there I'll have to stay calm and keep my big trap shut."

"I guess," Linda agreed with marked hesitation although she sincerely doubted that would be the case if there happened to be a positive result to share, and she didn't think that even her best poker face would be good enough to hide that from her unsuspecting detective husband for long.

###

"Sir, are you sure we should be in here right now?" Quincy whispered nervously as he was swiftly wheeled out of his room through the darkened corridor and into the next before being pulled up by Jamie's bed where they found him resting soundly under the influence of some additional anti-anxiety meds Janet provided to keep his emotional state in check and blood pressure down. "They've been trying to get this guy to sleep right for two days and he's having some kind of procedure tomorrow. Nurse Simmons will string me up by my giblets if she finds out we were in here and woke him up tonight… I can't even hum a few bars under my breath without getting the evil eye from her during the day, and this one at night scares me more," he admitted while envisioning Marguerite and Janet's perceived reactions to finding them in there.

"Let me get this straight," Commander Joel Rigsby muttered before parking the wheelchair and taking Quincy's IV bag out of his teeth before deftly hanging it up one-handed and going back to the door to peer cautiously out and confirm their movements had not been detected by Janet who had knowingly left the door to the ward unguarded under Kenzie's orders and given these two the space to operate by purposefully moving up the hall to an office to work on some reports where she wouldn't disturb their little covert mission to introduce themselves. "You were a skinny black kid who grew up with the gangs in Hell's Kitchen on 35th and 10th that liked to bake with his grandmother, went through my boot camp, faced the Marine dogs in sniper school, finished on the top of that pile and spent three years in one of the most elite SEAL units the glorious United States Navy has ever produced before jumping on an IED that blew off your leg and you're afraid of the nurses here?"

"Hell, yes, sir!" Quincy quickly hissed back.

"C'mon, aren't you curious about who this guy is and what they're doing to him?" Rigsby urged as he quietly closed the door and walked back over to take another peek, pulling up the blanket and carefully observing the metalwork over Jamie's leg before showing it to his companion. "Damn, look at what she had to do there… she just screwed it back on, and I thought my shoulder and what's left of your leg looked bad. Kenzie brought him from Washington with the red carpet treatment on the way in here… he bumped you off the table, plus that little rich weasel Oliver Wendell is jetting around to have a look, a New York City ADA and the goddamn Police Commissioner of the city himself is showing up to visit, so he's gotta be top shelf, right?"

"Seriously? What do you need? His name, rank and serial number? The fact that all their last names are Reagan isn't enough of a clue for you? He's the PC's kid. I heard them say it was his son when they were talking earlier… something about being hit by a car down in DC. Mystery solved, now get me outta here before she comes back!" Quincy begged with a nervous glance at the doorway and then back down at Jamie as he stirred, momentarily opening his eyes to reveal blurry images of the mismatched pair hovering next to him before succumbing to the drugs and shutting them once more with a deep sigh. "Crap! Look what you almost did! Keep your voice down!"

"That can't be it," Rigsby insisted with veiled intent as he purposefully ignored his friend's pleas and stayed on his train of thought. "When I came here, Kenzie promised she was doing all of this to look out after boots first with the money she got. She wouldn't go back on that now and bump one of us," the Commander pondered. "Besides, he came in with Fellows, and something weird's been up here lately. Too many people have been nosing around, plus I've seen his face somewhere, but I just can't put my finger on it."

"Yeah, well having that last name in this town buys a lot of privilege and ink," Quincy frowned considering a Reagan had been the city's top cop for most of what he could remember of his entire life. "Some of us don't ever get that, but maybe they're even paying for this… you don't know. They call him a sergeant anyway so he's either one of us or one of them, right? What does it matter, Rigs? You've got your intel now… case closed; let's leave him be. Look at that leg… the poor bastard's effed up like I was and Kenzie's trying to fix him so he can keep it, end of story. You know her, she's always trying to change things so they're better."

"Too bad you didn't get that opportunity back then."

"Whichever way it goes it won't be easy for him, trust me," Quincy added and thought back to his own derailed recovery from a similar injury which had been hampered by a long line of inept treatment in the years since his incident.

"Well, you're probably right. Privileged kid though, he probably won't have what it takes to get through something like this. Surprised Kenzie's wasting her time with him… just can't believe she would go back on her word," Rigsby continued as he shook his head. "She's never played politics before, and it kills me to see all the ones like you who fought for our country, and then when they come home everyone turns a blind eye to them for somebody better. Not enough of them get a chance like this… she wouldn't do that just to be nice to some brass."

"She's probably not unless she has to… and c'mon, if he's a cop he serves too, right?" Quincy argued back as he was becoming increasingly invested in Jamie's side of the situation which had been the Commander's intent all along since he already knew full well who this broken kid in the bed was. Joel Rigsby wasn't so much interested in the son of the NYPD Police Commissioner as he was in finding a reason to partner someone up with his friend to push forward with his own fight after years of disappointment. Above that he knew if Kenzie was proven successful with her program, it would mean the difference to countless others who would come after them. A name like Reagan in this city… especially one that had been hitting the news because he was working with one of their own and had ears open with the bigwigs in DC could indeed buy a lot of ink, so it was imperative there was a good outcome here.

"Sounds like a decent guy to me… got a pregnant wife and a kid he's worried about," Quincy continued without realizing he was being played as well. "Maybe Kenzie's trying to learn something to help the next boot. I know he's been having a rough time of it… pretty depressed already from what I can hear. That ain't gonna help him get through it, and I hate to see anyone go down that way," the younger man added knowingly with a frown as he looked at Jamie's sleeping form.

"He's having a tough time, huh?" the Commander outwardly softened a little around the edges as he contemplated that fact. After all these years if there was one thing he hated was to see someone give up without a fighting chance, plus as Quincy had implied before he was nearly bored out of his skull at the notion of being confined to close quarters with nothing to do but take nightly walkabouts to check on the men since there was no group filled with impressionable newbies to harass while he received his own treatments with an optimistic eye to heading back out onto the training field where he had spent the better part of the last decade and truly belonged. If Rigsby wasn't guiding someone along and helping better the mold for the next generation he felt useless, and a lifetime in the military working with the very best young men and women the country offered had honed a very simple set of rules he lived by which were summed up in the SEAL way of life, and he tended to apply them to almost every situation at hand.

"Probably could use a little good old-fashioned boot camp-style ass whupping to get him motivated and teach him a thing or two then," the older man reasoned. "I'll need help considering I only got one arm for now. You up for it again? He's gonna need a partner to push him and the rest of the floor is filled with pansies," Rigsby challenged knowing that his former student was also now facing a long road ahead in rehab after largely being confined to that chair for the past four years, and like Kenzie it was a point that had always bothered him.

"Yes, sir," Quincy smiled back, knowing full well what he and Jamie had just unknowingly signed up for. "Rule number two, right? If you want to change the world, find someone to help you paddle. You ain't fooling me, Rigs. If it hadn't been for you stayin' on top of me all this time, I might not have made it either. Now look at us, both here in this hospital and missing parts… your shoulder and my leg, but Kenzie's trying to work some more of her voodoo to give us some of them back when she doesn't have to. I don't think either of us have the right to complain if she's doing the same for someone else."

"No, probably not… and I guess I'll quit bitching about it if he proves he's tough enough to deserve it, but just where did you find Jesus and forgiveness, Cupcake?" Rigsby smirked as he stared back at Jamie and contemplated his approach while reverting to using Quincy's SEAL nickname.

"First time? My grandmomma's kitchen on 35th and 10th. Second time? On the side of the road in Afghanistan with Kenzie picking up the pieces and promising she'd find a way to put me back together again."

* * *

 _So what does everyone think about our first real introduction to Quincy and Commander Rigsby although we've had a touch of their characters pop up in the flashbacks a few times before? Both will prove to be vital to Jamie's recovery, but one might be very good at hiding a bigger secret that could play out at the end of this installment. Tissue alert spoiler. Moving on for now. Next, Eva approaches her daughter to try to smooth things over and Erin visits to offer some sisterly attention which will serve to calm her brother before surgery, but unfortunately set up a confrontation with Eddie when she arrives despite her husband's wishes._


	42. Chapter 42

Chapter 42

"Edit, lány… may we speak?" Eva requested softly after knocking on the bedroom door while standing out in the hall as the sounds of her daughter's sobs became apparent later well after midnight while Eddie mourned the absence of her husband when she desperately needed one of those midnight chitchats the couple were known for having. "Kérem… please, what is the matter? I am sorry for what was said before, and I have something for you," she tried to apologize before tapping once more. "Edit, I do not wish to wake Kaylin, but I will not go away… now open this door," she demanded more firmly when her initial request was not met.

"What is it, Mom? She's sleeping," Eddie informed in a quiet manner when she finally stepped to the door with a sniffle as she wiped her runny nose on the sleeve of one of Jamie's Harvard sweatshirts which was drawn up covering her hands.

"Edit, it is freezing cold in there!" Eva chided as the chill of the air matched her daughters's mood when she greeted her from the doorway and she drew her housecoat tightly closed against it. "You must not allow that child sleep in such a state or she'll catch an illness!" she insisted and entered the room to close the cracked window before turning up the thermostat which Eddie had habitually lowered in an effort to stave off her nightly pregnancy flush that had returned with a vengeance after being absent or perhaps just ignored for the last several days. A quick check of Kaylin found her soundly snuggled and warm in a nest of fleece blankets that were always stashed on Jamie's side to which Eva sighed in relief even as Bear bounded off the foot of the bed and streaked away down the hall to put distance between himself and his Hungarian nemesis.

"I would never do anything to hurt her, Mom," Eddie rasped quietly with pained intent from behind.

"Well, of course not… I did not mean it in that fashion. You're a very good mother to this kicsi, your little one... much better than I can do," Eva replied as she turned around. "I know you do not feel the same for me right now and I am again sorry for that, but come downstairs… there is something for you," she repeated and brushed by on a determined path down the steps to the kitchen which Eddie soon reluctantly followed, more out of curiosity than any desire to listen to that request.

"What is it?" she asked and frowned as she pulled up a chair at the breakfast bar while her mother was busy rooting through the bottom freezer drawer in the refrigerator.

"Here!" Eva exclaimed as she pulled up a familiar plain, white styrofoam cup with a plastic cover which she brought over and deposited on the counter after first pausing at the utensil drawer to retrieve a spoon. "I do not know if it is right, but that is all there is. Your father requested it," she added.

"Daddy?" Eddie puzzled as she pulled off the top to find the remains of a familiar frozen confection. "Anya, where did you get this?" she demanded as her brow furrowed.

"Tvoj otac… your father asked that I find that terrible flavor of ice cream the two of you share, but I could not today with the circumstances, and there was none left here so this was the best that could be provided."

"Avery's Down East New England-style Chocolate Double Fudge Brownie Blizzard," Eddie recited with a half-smile as it warmed her heart to think about the lengths Armin Janko and now Jamie would go through of course since she was pregnant to make sure she was provided with her favorite indulgence. "But this is a fudge brownie sundae from the Blue Moo creamery up by Sunset park," she added without getting the connection, although this was a clear second favorite and a go to substitution in a pinch. Still, there were very few people that knew with the exception of her husband who was not of a mind to bring that up and surely her father locked up in a federal detention center in New Jersey or a mother recently imported from Rochester would not have a clue. She doubted that even Henry was aware. "Where did this come from? What does Daddy have to do with it?"

"Edit, when your father and I spoke the other day," Eva started and then noted with regret the heavy sigh of unhappiness that escaped from her daughter's lips as they went down that long dark road again. "I will admit that I was at first very angry," she explained. "It was a shock to hear his voice and there is much between him and I that has not been said for so many years, but he is your otac and had concerns for you when he heard about Jamison and all you are facing with the beba. We have decided that is what is important now… you and our grandchild…ren," she corrected with a look upstairs to where Kaylin lay sleeping. "What is for us cannot be undone and perhaps we shall never agree on that, but it will not be used to come between you and your father again. It is finished, lány. We have swung the hatchet and will move forward now."

"Buried the hatchet, you mean," Eddie corrected the expression hopefully as a glimmer of light flashed that maybe something good had finally happened after a week of heavy hits in all other aspects of her life. "Really?"

"Indeed. So he asked that I share with you that ice cream for a sign of peace, but it could not be found," Eva explained regretfully. "Jamison told me once where he would go, but I did not listen well enough to remember what was said."

"But where did you get this from then?"

"That man… your partner from the police station, the one from the wedding who escorted me. He stopped by today with it out of worry because you were not there last week, and you called to cancel work for tomorrow without returning his messages. He did not know about the situation… so it is as you say a nice coincidence that he brought it?"

"Wilson?" Eddie surmised with some guilt for having ducked out of answering any calls and messages from him or Kara except to say that she was fine and would explain later and deal with Dexter's wrath when she got back to the 12th. But for the Reagans and members of his staff, at Frank's request few others had been informed of Jamie's accident in an effort to keep the media attention down to a minimum here in New York, and the small article that had appeared in the Washington papers the day after the accident had surprisingly stayed under the radar while buried under the glut of storm-related coverage taking precedence for the past several days.

"Yes," Eva confirmed and nodded as her daughter conceded and took a spoonful of the chocolaty concoction. "There was more, but Kaylin begged for some so she had it instead. He is a very nice man," she added as Eddie continued to eat. "When we explained what had happened, he helped Henry move some of the furniture in the dining room so it could be seen what was needed to order a bed for Jamison for when he is able to come home, and they talked about perhaps it would be best to change the powder room across the hall into a bigger space with a wider door and small shower with a bench so that he could more easily care for himself until he is ready to go upstairs again. Mr. Wilson took some measurements for there and the closet in the laundry room behind to see what could be done if a wall was removed and said he would talk to you about it this week, but that he would keep the rest to himself."

"He did?" Eddie asked around another bite as the cold, creamy dessert began to disappear quickly while her emotional state stabilized. "He does do some remodeling on the side to keep busy and earn extra for his kids' college savings on our days off. That would be a big help," she brightened at the thought of her husband actually coming home since the details of that had not yet even occurred to her and somehow it was comforting to think that there were others already concerned with them. "I wonder how much it would cost though. Even with Henry holding the mortgage on the house, we'll need to watch our spending until Jamie can work again. Disability doesn't pay too much from the department, but maybe he can keep doing his legal consulting until he goes back on patrol. I should call Renzulli and tell him he'll be out for a little while though," she added in a matter-of-fact manner which had her mother raising an eyebrow, but unwilling to challenge at the moment since her daughter was in such an amicable state.

"He said again, not to worry about that," Eva revealed. "It would be taken care of, and there will be many things, Edit," her mother advised knowingly. "This will not be an easy time for you, but there is money from the sale of my house in Rochester if you need it to be there in a few weeks, and if you'll have me I will stay here to help and pay for my room until that is not necessary... if you'll have me," she repeated with some hesitation given Eddie's reaction the day before.

"Mom, you can't... I mean we can't take your money," Eddie corrected, honestly surprised by the offer since she knew how difficult things had been financially for her mother since Armin's arrest and how very hard Eva had worked to put herself right in the years since.

"Edit, I know that I am not the mother always that you have wished for, but you cannot do this by yourself no matter how much you want especially now that you are also with a child. I know that I do not always do what is right, but I can help with the house and the meals. I promise to try to be more patient with Kaylin, she has been upset and I have not made that better," Eva admitted.

"Anya, I know you are trying, and I've been making mistakes with her too," Eddie sighed as she dropped the spoon in the bottom of the now empty container. "She's insecure after what happened to Jayne, and so attached to Jamie. He told me that I needed to come home and take care of her… that she needed to be put first and that he could manage himself, even when he's having things done to him like today. But he can't," she admitted in a shallow voice. "Right now he's not able to do almost anything for himself, and that scares him and it's scaring me. I just don't know what to do."

"Follow your heart, lány, and be there with him. Do not let him say no to you," Eva advised as she walked over to her daughter's side for a gentle hug and kiss on the side of the head. "You know what is right and have always done well with that even when others told you to do something different. If we all do our part, it will come good again. You can get through this, Edit... I know you can do it and I will help."

###

"C'mon, Sergeant Reagan… I know you can do it. I'll help," Aaron Snyder, the resident physical therapist, encouraged as he introduced some passive mobilization exercises and gently began flexing and rotating his good leg.

"Jamie," his charge insisted through gritted teeth as he lay flat on the bed and even that seemingly subtle movement proved to be overwhelming after the frustration of a morning respiratory therapy session that had seen him likewise muddled. In short by this point he was in no mood to continue although he resigned himself to try what with Marguerite now in attendance for the day shift and eyeballing his progress from across the hall. "Just please call me Jamie. I'm a cop, not a soldier… and I'm not on duty anymore."

"You got it, man. Jamie, it is then. All you need to do is relax and let me do the work for now."

"Easier said than done," Jamie grimaced visibly as Aaron systematically worked his way up and down his already surprisingly stiff joints. "Ow, that's tight."

"I know, sorry. You're still pretty bruised up over here so I'll keep this short, but we're just trying to maintain your range of motion and improve the circulation on this side of your hip until we can build that back up on the right once we get downstairs in the rehab room after you have your surgeries and that fixator comes off," he hummed along as he worked and then tried to distract with small talk when things got more sensitive. "Hey, did you watch that Jet's game last night? What a catch by Anderson for two… fingertips over the back in the end zone to win it as time ran out. Couldn't believe it. That guy probably needed a chiropractor this morning the way he twisted himself up to hold on."

"Nope, missed it," Jamie grunted with a sigh as he recalled his brother's disbelief when they had witnessed the replay.

"Too bad, probably never see anything like it live again," Aaron commiserated as he finished the exercises on the left. "What do you think about me just lifting the other side a few inches and working on that?" he asked as he eyeballed the sore right hip which had a date with Dr. Kenzie and her infamous bonesaw in just a few hours' time. "We could get just a tiny bit done over there."

"I think I'd rather not," Jamie admitted honestly with a look of surprise. "What's the point, considering?"

"Coward!" came an unexpected catcall from an interested party and a now oddly familiar voice one room down the hall. "When he's done with you, he's comin' for me, man! Do me a favor and keep him busy for a while!" Quincy advised. "The guy's a sadist! He likes to see grown men cry!"

"Quincy Johnson!" Marguerite huffed as she hurried over from her station. "That will be enough from you, young man!" she advised as she quickly closed the door to his room. "The death of me, these two… please, God, don't have the Commander in here at the same time or I'll have to put in for full combat pay," she muttered under her breath before reappearing around the corner with an eyebrow raised. "I think that's good for today, Aaron. He's got surgery in a couple of hours so Dr. Kenzie doesn't want him stressed too much, and he has a visitor waiting. Your sister is on her way back, _Jamie,"_ she advised with emphasis on his preferred name as she turned heel and went back to her desk with a nod to Erin as she came down the hall. "Go ahead in, he's finishing up right now," she advised while eying the plain brown bag his older sibling was carrying. "No more food today before surgery, I'm afraid… they'll be starting pre-op in about two hours."

"Oh, I know," Erin smirked back at the friendly nurse. "But I heard he wasn't cooperating on this front so I brought something to perk him up for later if that's okay? Alston's mac and cheese," she announced while reaching out to rattle the bag and twirl it around suggestively in the doorway. "Something my baby brother has never been able to resist before."

"Erin," Jamie sighed as his bed was being adjusted up and he pulled the covers back over with a shiver. "I swear it's like Grand Central in here today. Thought I was supposed to be _resting,"_ he mocked with air quotes as she peeked around the corner with a smile, determined to lift his spirits. "Say goodbye to Aaron," he advised to point out the similarity of their names as the therapist had gathered his things and was headed out the door on his way to Quincy's room. "No fair playing dirty like that," he added as he eyed the bag while his stomach frustratingly growled in hunger for the first time since the accident.

"Not dirty, but you of all people know I play to win," Erin advised as she made her way in and set the container down on the window seat along with her briefcase while she was taking off her scarf and coat, pleased that contrary to the report she received that morning from her worried older brother that Jamie's attitude seemed a little lighter today. "Did you sleep any better last night?" she added hopefully. "Danny said he got himself kicked out early."

"Yeah, a bit," he answered agreeably. Out of everyone so far, his sister had surprisingly reined in her usual overbearing mother-hen instincts in front of him at least, and had been the only one from the family to look at him without pity when visiting or seemingly harbor an ulterior motive like Danny and his damn investigation. "Just had a few weird dreams," he added while recalling those disconnected blurry images of a couple of late night visitors. "Could have sworn someone was in here talking to me."

"Hm, we call that hearing voices in my line of work," she teased, "Better not get yourself labeled."

"Har, har, har," he mused with a bored glance at her overstuffed brief. "How'd a busy ADA like you get the afternoon off anyway?" he questioned. "Or did you bring your work with you? You know you don't have to put yourself out to be here, Erin," he reminded. "You have that big corruption case coming up. Today's not supposed to be any big deal. I told Eddie to stay home with Kaylin too, but she won't listen to me," he added with just a hint of frustration creeping back into his voice which Erin quickly detected but did not comment on.

"So you say, but you're not the boss of me… or her," she answered. "Speaking of which Grandpa is coming tomorrow, and I think he'll try to shoot his way in if they stop him again. Prepare yourself for a hundred stories on the good old days when men were men and cops got comped for everything," she kidded.

"Okay," Jamie replied quietly while going introspective and looking away suddenly, playing with the hem of the blanket covering his leg before angrily pushing it away.

"You want to talk about it, buster?" Erin asked.

"No, not really," he sighed. "It's just… never mind. Can we not? I mean, can it be about anything else but this and what's happening when and what's best for what, or what I remember?"

"Sure," she replied as her brow furrowed considering Jamie was usually the one to be completely engrossed in researching every iota of information to be thoroughly informed. "So you'd rather talk about the price of Christmas trees in Dubai instead?"

"Yeah, please?"

"Hey, speaking of which, that's a pretty nifty setup you've got there with the lights in the living room at home. Looks like Baby Jesus is tripping from his spot there in the manger underneath," she joked just as Jamie's mind flashed as quickly as the lights in Kaylin's cherished LED display to an image of Mason's face as he carried the tree into their house to Sonny's oddly similar expression just as he pulled the trigger of the gun pointed up into his brain… _No reason, an answer for the ages, be safe,_ the words echoed behind them in both the Malevsky's voices as he remained zoned out.

"Jamie, did you hear me?" Erin spoke up louder as she caught on to his blank staring fugue state. "I said Nicki got to experience the sixties for herself when she was over the other day. Somehow I don't think Grandma would have approved of that in her house. Jamie? Are you okay?" she worried with a glance towards Marguerite in case the nurse's intervention was warranted.

"Yeah, no I'm fine," he finally broke free of the trance and answered. "They say I'm not getting enough real sleep so guess sometimes I wind up dreaming while I'm awake… I've been seeing lots of stuff from before," he explained. "It's nothing, sorry."

"Hey, don't apologize," Erin insisted before adding a qualifier. "Tell me what I can do to make you relax and feel better right here, right now… c'mon, Jamie, we've got a couple of hours to chill together and I know you just want some sisterly TLC," she begged once more without response. "Well, I figured you might need some stuff, so I grabbed a few things that would pass inspection downstairs to spruce this place up. It's tough considering you're not allowed anything electronic except I checked with Marguerite and you can have a razor so I made you up a little kit here with that, a mirror and some lotions and lip balm and stuff so you can stay handsome without waiting for the nurse to do it, those sour patch gummy bears you love, a week's worth of magazines and puzzle books, plus I've got some photos in here," she advised as she pulled her full brief over and revealed a few small frames with silly shots of the family and Kaylin front and center which she noted gave her brother an instant lift with an evident smile as she set them up on the window ledge so they were in clear view. "Here's some pictures she colored for you and let's see… what else… the Harvard fleece blanket from your bed at Dad's house since you complained about being cold last time I was here and oh! These are the best! A spikey rubber stress ball set. I love these… had them in my office. You can either squeeze them for a release, roll them along tight muscles for a massage or chuck them at people when they piss you off… could come in handy as ammunition the next time Danny visits," she smirked as she carefully arranged everything in his reach and threw the blanket over top of him.

"Almost perfect," Jamie grinned a little as he relaxed back amid the comfort of the familiar items, especially the warmth of the fleece since he had found himself oddly chilled all day. "Tell me there's a bottle of scotch in your church lady's purse over there too and I might have to admit you're the best sister I've ever had."

"Sorry... that I could not pull off, but if you're nice to me next time I'll make you some of those holiday rum balls that are strong enough to take down half the horses in Dad's mounted patrol unit."

"Deal," he agreed as she carefully inched her way onto the bed to lay next to him after grabbing the remote and crossing her legs before wrapping an arm gently over his shoulders ready to indulge in some guilty pleasures just like they did when they were younger and stayed home from school sick together on the couch.

"Daytime television… Judge Judy here we come."

* * *

 _So Erin was able to successfully work in some of her mother-hen ways under the radar anyway to lift Jamie's spirits, but when Eddie returns that afternoon despite her husband's wishes both women will notice a shift in his demeanor and that might cause a little jealousy on one part and see them clash a bit on what's best for his future._


	43. Chapter 43

Chapter 43

"Erin! What are you doing?" Eddie whispered in surprise when she finally arrived after two o'clock, having kept her promise to spend the better part of the day attending to Kaylin, only to find Jamie asleep and leaning against his sister who was on the bed next to him sitting up and reading one of the depositions she had brought with her. "You're not supposed to be on there… I mean is he okay with that? He couldn't even stand having a pillow next to him the other day!" she worried. "Where did all this stuff come from? You brought his blanket?"

"Oh, no he seems fine with it," Erin answered as she looked up from the page and over her glasses before carefully disengaging herself and slipping off the side without waking him. "I just thought some things from home might cheer him up," she explained. "Danny said he was a little down when he left here last night."

"He did? Well, why didn't he call _me_ then?" Eddie demanded before reconsidering how that sounded. "I'm sorry… he probably figured I knew of course since I was here yesterday, and Jamie was stressing all day… but how did you get him to do that?" she asked before sitting down in a little-defeated slump on the seat by the window.

"Do what?"

"Let you sit there? He hasn't really wanted me to touch him or get too close since… well since it happened," she recalled sadly as she thought about those first moments at the hospital in DC after Jamie came to the first time... confused to the point where he didn't even remember her name. Ever since then he had always seemed to have his right hand up between them at first ready to push her away or guard himself. "I thought that was because it hurt too much to move or get bumped… that he was just protecting his ribs," she added, forgetting that initial time had seen her trying uncomfortably to block him with a pillow while setting off a full-blown anxiety attack. "But I guess not."

"Well," Erin paused. "I'm sure he's just starting to heal and feel better now," she answered with carefully chosen words since she could see that her sister-in-law was starting to tense up herself and she knew the last thing Jamie needed was to wake up and find his wife there in such a state right before they took him to the operating room. "He said he slept better last night and was having physical therapy when I got here. He took a dose of meds afterward... and honestly I didn't even give it a thought," she admitted truthfully. "That's just how we used to pass the time when one of us was home sick for whatever reason when we were kids. Once we all had the flu… Jamie was three I think, and all four of us piled into our parent's room for three days because it had the biggest bed and there was a tv in there… even Danny stayed. It's just something we did."

"Oh," Eddie conceded as she sat back and put a hand on her stomach. "Maybe Kaylin and the baby will do that someday, too. I never had a brother or sister," she shrugged. "Guess I missed out on some of that. I just had to stay in my room alone whenever I was sick."

"Yes, well, I'm not sure it just wasn't Mom and Dad's method to confine us all in one small space of the house with buckets on hand because they thought cleanup was easier that way," Erin chuckled at the memory.

"Nothing with Danny or you was easier that way," Jamie muttered as he opened his eyes after waking and listening to the last bit. "He always controlled the remote, and you hogged all the pillows because the two of you were the oldest... Hey, I told you not to come," he sighed when he saw Eddie's face considering she had forgotten to put any makeup on and had just roughly done her hair up in a loose ponytail. "You should have stayed home with sweetness and got some rest. You look tired, Ed."

"And I told you, we're not even having this discussion because I need to be here for you," she huffed and leaned over gently to kiss him before involuntary or not, there was a definite subtle flinch when she got near. "Jamie, why did you do that?"

"Do what?" he puzzled while completely unaware of his actions as his demeanor cooled a degree which she immediately regretted.

"Nothing… never mind…" she covered while thinking about how lonely their bed at home had been even with the little super-nova of energy that was their daughter in there with her. "I guess I was up pretty late talking to Mom... I just really missed you last night is all. Kaylin had her feet in my face most of the time and you usually block her," she laughed and tried to keep things light as her eyes spotted the new pictures on the window sill. "Oh, crap. She finished coloring this huge get-well card for you this morning and I left it laying on the table when I walked out. I'm sorry, baby… I meant to bring it, so you'd be surprised to see it when you woke up, but I guess Erin had the same idea," she stifled a small frown behind her back but not the little edge in her voice as she turned away in a feigned attempt to admire the artwork that must have been completed while Erin was helping Henry at the house while they were in Washington.

"It's okay, next time maybe. Is she better?" he asked. "Did they have school?"

"Not today, probably tomorrow when the parking lots are cleared, but yeah, she's a lot more settled now that I was home and she sees that you will be soon too… she's been good with Mom today especially after she helped move some stuff around in the dining room and we showed her where you'll be staying," she explained.

"The dining room?"

"Well, yeah... you'll need to be downstairs for a little while and Pop thought that was the best place, but we don't have to talk about that now," she assured without getting into a discussion over Wilson's proposed renovations before glancing around and spotting the containers from Alston's in the bag where they had been left. "Mac and cheese? I thought you couldn't eat before surgery?" she asked with a bit of an irritated wrinkle that was not hidden at all this time.

"Oops, I forgot. My bad. Sorry, that's for later... I'm sure it's still fine. Let me run those down to the cafe and stick them in the fridge and we can warm them up when he feels like eating," Erin apologized a little sheepishly before leaving the room and stopping across the hall to speak to Marguerite.

"Ed, honey, what's wrong?" Jamie sighed. "Don't take it out on Erin; she's just trying to make things better in her own way and I'm sorry I was such a jerk yesterday… actually, Danny used another word, but I got upset when I heard what Kaylin was doing, and you look so beat… I'm just frustrated with everything."

"Jamie, I want to make things better too, but I just feel like I'm screwing up every time I turn around," she admitted with a sad sigh as she sat carefully back down on the edge of the bed. "I couldn't even manage to remember Kaylin's card… and your Dad was the one to pick that up for her in the first place. Look at all the stuff your sister brought… I never even thought about any of that," she teared up. "No wonder you don't want me here. I'm sorry."

"Hey, no… please, that's not true..." he begged and cursed himself for hurting her more while grabbing her hand. "I do want you… I _need_ you, Ed. You, Kaylin and the baby are the only things that matter to me. I'm the one that screwed up… I stood there and let this happen to me… to us, and seeing you both upset because of that… it just rips at my heart, okay? I'm the one that's been messed up and not thinking straight; you haven't done anything wrong," he assured, and this time did not move away but rather put his arm around her when she leaned in and cried against his shoulder. "Please, c'mere," he begged and moved over with a slight grimace as he pulled her closer. "Just sit here with me until they come, okay? Like you said, we'll get through today and then get through tomorrow until this is over."

Meanwhile, in the hallway, the couple's state had been noticed by a concerned sister and sympathetic nurse. "Great, now she's got him upset again," Erin muttered as she watched all her careful work from that morning undone by a seemingly persistent weepy sister-in-law. "How is he supposed to focus on getting better when she has him all in knots every time she's here?"

"It's a common stress reaction for both, dear," Marguerite advised knowingly. "We see it often. Many times, trauma survivors will show a high level of arousal, which causes them to react strongly to sounds and sights around them. He is responsible in nature and sensitive to his wife's fears, and she is simply overwhelmed. Having such a reaction has nothing to do with personal weakness. It might last for several days or even a few weeks. For most people, if symptoms occur, they will slowly decrease over time."

"Except that it can't be good for him to be going through that and all these surgeries too, right?" Erin worried as she focused on her brother.

"No, of course not, or her being pregnant at the same time," Marguerite reminded. "I'm sure having shifting hormones like that is not a help. Stress can impair healing and make him more susceptible to complications, but I'm afraid it is not an ideal situation for either of them."

"So, what will help _him_ the most right now though?" Erin asked. "I've tried talking to her, but that's not going too well, and I feel like I'm only making it worse," she admitted with concern. "Maybe my Dad can get through to her, but for Jamie… I mean I'm sure you've seen what works in your experience. I just want my little brother to get better," she admitted quietly with a break in her voice. "He didn't deserve this."

"Of course, dear," the older woman acknowledged. "None of these young people do, like this one," she nodded towards where Jamie's wardmate lay sleeping. "He's here with no close family to support him, but he has a belief in himself and an attainable goal now… Dr. Kenzie has given him that again through her work after he's seen much disappointment, and there's no one here that would dare question he will succeed if it is at all possible. Jamie just needs a little bit of the same faith. It will come," she assured. "We'll see to it that the two of them will be together and Quincy will pull him along a little until he finds it because that's his way, and there are good people here that will help."

"Faith in himself and an attainable goal," Erin repeated before reaching over to squeeze the trusted nurse's hand. "Thank you for taking such good care of him, Marguerite. You're a saint, and I'm gonna make sure he has that."

###

"Okay, let's see here… Sergeant Jamie Reagan," a male voice with a thick Southern accent broke through all too soon and had Eddie pushing up reluctantly away from her husband's side as the anesthesiologist knocked and came through the doorway. "Sorry to interrupt, son… but it looks like you and I have a date," the older man advised. "Billie Swanson, your trip master for the afternoon," he introduced lightheartedly while reviewing his paperwork. "So, we're doing a few things today… moving a nerve block with a catheter so we cover the hip area as well as the femur and then we'll have you under general for a short time during the actual procedure itself, okay? Everything else checks out so I'll be calling for transport and giving you something short acting before they get here to keep you comfortable while we flip you around to perform the block and they prep things, then you'll wake up a bit back there in pre-op so I can confirm everything is good before lights out. No food since seven, correct?"

"Yeah," Jamie sighed and gave Eddie's hand a squeeze. "Can she stay with me?"

"Just for that first part in here, only authorized staff allowed down the hall I'm afraid," Bill advised. "We'll take good care of him, ma'am," he assured. "He'll be back in here before you know it. Just give me a few minutes to make sure they're ready for us back there and we'll get this show started."

"I'll be fine," Jamie assured his wife in the remaining few minutes between. "This is nothing, remember? She's just going to go in, take a piece of the bone off, scrape some stuff out and close it back up. It's just a little cut on my butt of all damn places. Make sure you get something to eat or take a nap, promise? Go sit with Erin out front now. You don't need to see them take me and get upset."

"It's your hip, a four-inch incision… I looked it up on a YouTube video... but I promise I'll be okay," Eddie vowed with a deep breath, not revealing to him that watching the procedure had made her feel physically ill once more... still, she had to be informed; it was her job now to do that for him. "I want to stay here. Besides, I'm supposed to be telling you it'll be alright, not the other way around," she added just as Bill came back around the corner with a familiar face in tow. "Rebecca?" she puzzled with a start before explaining to Jamie. "She was your nurse during the last surgery in Washington. What are you doing here?"

"First day on a new job. Dr. Kenzie offered me a wonderful opportunity to join her surgical team here and learn. I was supposed to fly up with her and this one on Friday," she nodded to Jamie. "But you bugged out early and caught me off guard, so I packed up my duffle and took the train north before the storm. Glad to see you're doing better though, sir."

"One of the orderlies for this floor came down with the flu and called out," Billie explained, not knowing that his patient had already had an encounter with the man in the elevator who was explicitly trying to avoid a repeat occurrence for now before the time was right to get Jamie alone again… he certainly couldn't get away with drugging him at this point to maintain his cover. "Small crew… we're all multi-taskers in a pinch, so the newbie drew the short straw and double duty," he quipped. "You ready?"

"Wait… just give me a second alone with my sister," Jamie asked as Eddie felt another twinge of jealousy when his gaze fell directly on her and it was obvious exactly who he wanted out of the room for a sibling tête-à-tête. "Please? You can come back before they give me the shot."

"No problem, we're a little ahead of schedule," Billie replied. "Let's give them a minute," he added as the room cleared and Erin was ushered back in with the door closing behind her.

"Hey," she whispered as she rushed back over. "What is it? Are you scared?"

"No, I'll be good," he affirmed with an imploring look. "Stay with her, alright? She's really rattled. Promise you'll get her home safe if I don't wake up right away or take her out of here if I'm talking crap. You know how I am… I hurt her in Washington the last time. I can't do that again. I've been holding off the drugs as much as they'll let me when she's here. Promise me, Erin," he insisted when he sensed her reluctance.

"Jamie, I really don't think Eddie really wants me hovering over her," his sister sighed. "She won't listen to anything I say, and you shouldn't be doing that… you're hurting yourself because she can't pull it together. I'm more worried about you," she revealed.

"Promise," he reiterated as his eyes narrowed.

"Okay, I promise I'll try," she tried to appease him, but then continued when it became apparent that response wasn't going to fly considering the patented stubborn Reagan set of the jaw she observed. "All right, I'll make sure, even if I have to call in the big guns."

"Dad?"

"Grandpa," she countered. "But you and I are gonna have a long talk after this, Jamison Henry Reagan. You have to stop putting everyone else's needs in front of your own, and I am so not going to sit by in silence anymore and watch you suffer because of it. Understood, buster?"

"Deal," he agreed reluctantly knowing from experience and that mirrored obstinate look that there wasn't going to be any detour around that conversation.

###

"Are you sure I can't get you anything?" Erin asked through thinly pursed lips as she returned to Jamie's room from the lounge. "At least have something to drink… this tea is pretty good," she observed.

"No, I'm fine, thanks," Eddie replied shakily from where she was seated in the chair next to the bed trying to hide her unease by paging erratically through one of the Hot Rod magazines her sister-in-law had provided. In spite of her resolve to project confidence, she hadn't budged from the spot since watching quietly as the light rushed out of her husband's hazel eyes while they closed and his grip slipped from hers just seconds after the upbeat Billie Swanson injected something into his port before he was taken away by virtual strangers once more… pulled unceremoniously as helpless dead weight onto a gurney by two nurses and the anesthesiologist before being covered up and wheeled away from her down that damn authorized only hallway and through the double doors at the end more than an hour ago which meant Dr. Kenzie was now likely getting ready to make a "straight longitudinal incision over the posterior superior iliac spine," or so said that dry unattached voice in the damn video she had forced herself to watch before coming up here.

"How about something to eat?" Erin tried again, attempting to hold true to her promise to make sure Eddie was cared for while her little brother was being sliced open back there. "There's enough mac and cheese for all of us if you'd like… I can warm some up. I doubt even Jamie can finish all that, especially today. I'll stop and bring him some more later this week again."

"You really shouldn't do that," Eddie let slip with more of an annoyed tone than she had intended. "Marguerite gave me a guide," she insisted in an effort to explain. "He's supposed to be eating a high protein diet to promote healing, not empty carbs. The nutritionist they have plans his meals very carefully."

"Oo...kay," Erin drawled out with an unconcealed frown now as she had been gracious up to this point in ignoring her sister-in-law's unhappy little barbs all afternoon but worry for her younger brother overcame her good sense for an unfortunate moment. "From what I've heard he's not eating much of anything," she bit back a little too sharply before continuing. "So, something has to be better than nothing at this point, right? Pardon me for bringing him some of his favorite things to make him feel better. Maybe if he could relax and not worry about you so much he'd get better faster."

"Wait, what?" Eddie's eyes flashed up angrily at that insinuation. "Do you have something you need to say to me, Erin Reagan?" she demanded defensively as her Serbian temper sparked. "You think I'm doing something wrong by wanting to be here with him and make sure he's okay? He's my husband!"

"And he's my brother! So, when I see him purposefully keeping himself in pain when he's around you just so he doesn't say something that might hurt your feelings while he's drugged up, I do think it's wrong! Do you want to know what he said to me before he went back there? He made me promise to look after you and to make sure to take you home if he had trouble waking up so he wouldn't upset you. He was more worried about that than the fact he was headed to surgery. And if you can't see what's happening, then I'm sorry that I have to be the one to point it out!"

"You think I would ever purposely hurt him? That I want him to do that for me?" Eddie gasped at what felt like a definite verbal slap in the face from her sister-in-law. "I haven't done or said anything to make him think that way!"

"Not on purpose… no, of course not," Erin softened a little, silently berating herself for losing her temper like that since all of this would no doubt come out in front of her brother now which made her just as guilty for causing him grief at a time like this. "But if Jamie sees you upset at all, he feels like he's letting you down and since he loves you he will do anything… I mean _anything_ in his power not to do that," she emphasized. "Right now, there's almost nothing under his control except for that button over there and I'm afraid he's not going to be able to accept what's ahead if you think that wishing is going to make everything perfect again and he's gonna be able to go back to the way things were before. I know that's what you want… we all do, but he's the one that has to live through it, and if he feels like he's failing you… well, Jamie doesn't do failure well."

"And you think you're a better judge of what he's capable of than me, his own wife?" Eddie challenged. "Jamie is not a quitter, and I'm sure you wouldn't appreciate my input if God forbid this was about you and Nicki!"

"I used to change his diapers when he was little," Erin rebuffed. "I'm more like a mom than a sister since we lost ours. I've watched him his whole life and I've seen how he handles loss, so yeah, I think I have a pretty good idea what he's going through right now and what the best way to help him is," she insisted.

"Well, he's not little or alone now. _We_ are living this together, Erin… it's not just him, and not just me… it's four of us, and it's not just about this. _We_ have to worry about how Kaylin is affected and even what's going on with our baby. If you had to walk a mile in _our_ shoes this week, maybe you'd realize why I've been so upset because almost every possible damn thing that could have gone wrong has!"

If Eddie had realized how prophetic her own words were, she would not have been surprised to learn that very instant down the hall beyond the "Authorized Personnel Only" doors a surgeon's eyes were darting up from her work in concern as an alarm sounded on one of the monitors and had the anesthesiologist instantly jumping up from his seat.

"Are you freaking kidding me, Sergeant Jamie Reagan?" Kenzie cursed with the saw in her hands, just mere seconds after making the first careful cut on the crest of Jamie's exposed iliac bone to mine the cancellous material that would be used in her proprietary method to create a natural scaffold with growth proteins to form the new material in his leg. "What is going on?" she demanded as her mind whirled with possible causes that were not limited to a major bleed from that injured spleen they had been carefully nursing along so far.

"Billie, get the ultrasound back over here. I need to know right now why that number is dropping so fast!"

* * *

Oops, so a bit of an unexpected spat between the sister-in-laws there with fair points made by both, but how will Eddie cope with the upcoming news out of the operating room, and will Erin likewise be able to accept that neither she nor anyone else in the Reagan family has legal standing to make decisions on Jamie's behalf anymore now that he is married, and like it or not there's another woman who has the final say. 


	44. Chapter 44

Chapter 44

"Sir, your detail is waiting to take you uptown to the medical center," Detective Baker informed the Commissioner from the doorway at the end of what had been a very busy work day as the city and its services came back to status quo after the major wintery interruption. "DCLM Miller is requesting five minutes if you're available."

"Send him in," Frank agreed as he deliberately closed the folder on a report and pushed it to the side for tomorrow. After a marathon weekend he hoped to check in briefly on his youngest following what was supposed to be a relatively minor procedure and then make the trek home to Bay Ridge for a promised home cooked meal with Henry and the first good sleep in his own bed for many nights.

"Has there been any word?"

"Not yet," he replied with a glance at his watch. "He should be coming out shortly if they started on time. Erin promised to call when they heard anything. And that will be all," he dismissed his assistant with a grateful smile for all of her hard work and attention. "Have a safe drive home, Abigail."

"Thank you, sir. Give my best to everyone."

"I will do that," Frank promised before standing to greet the head of his legal division, Deputy Commissioner Miller, as he entered with a worried look on his face. "Chuck," he acknowledged.

"Frank, I just heard," his old friend cut straight to the chase. "Chairman Atwater called a few minutes ago from Washington wanting to know how Jamie was doing. I'm so sorry… I had no idea what happened until now; this is terrible news," he added sincerely, having always been close to the Reagan family, and he had followed Jamie's schooling and attendance at Harvard with special interest over the years with the recent hope to lure him into his department. "What hospital is he in? Atwater said he needed emergency surgery and was life flighted up here? It's that serious?"

"He's at Columbia, and we're trying to keep that quiet for now," Frank revealed the basics. "Ribs, some internal injuries and a badly broken leg," he informed without getting into the full extent of the situation. "Luckily there were no significant head injuries, but there have been some issues with the medication. He's having some additional procedures done this week and not allowed outside visitors other than the family for now."

"Oh, of course, of course," Miller agreed. "I still can't believe it… we just spoke the other day. Have they found the driver that hit him yet? I have contacts in the DA's office down there I can work to make sure the bastard is put away underneath the jail."

"No, nothing yet. No witnesses and very little in the way of forensics," his boss explained. "Danny's looking into it unofficially, but it doesn't look like much will come of it," he added, completely unaware of the targeted events to come in the next few months that would void that statement and inflict further untold damage to his family, and in particular his two remaining sons.

"Is there anything else I can do? Frank, you know you just have to say the word..." Miller insinuated, and both men were well aware of the door he had just opened. "I extended an offer to my second choice for the position in the department just this morning… if I had known earlier... but I can make it go away," he added. "I don't have any other slots opening soon, but this one can give him a path forward up the ladder and off the street if that's necessary. He has talents that aren't being utilized as a beat cop."

"I'm afraid Jamie's got a long road ahead before he's even ready to address that," Frank revealed as he declined the proposal in spite of what he knew would be a heavy objection from his daughter. "It's too early to bring that up and holding that spot would be blatant nepotism. He wouldn't be able to start for months. I won't do it, Chuck… I can't. If that's the case, and it's needed, he'll have to look outside of the department. Right now he needs to focus on his recovery."

"Frank, you are one stubborn, over-ethical son of a… it's only nepotism if he's not the best person for the job, otherwise it's just plain reverse discrimination! If you change your mind… let me know soon. The offer hasn't been accepted yet, but I expect it will be and then it's out of my hands. My best to the family," he reiterated with a handshake after Frank grabbed his briefcase and went over to the coat rack to retrieve his jacket. "I'll walk out with you," Miller added just as Frank's phone began to ring.

"Sorry, I need to take this," he waved off the DCLM as the ID flashed on the screen from the nurse's station at Columbia. "It's probably Erin," he explained. "Hello? Honey is that you? What's wrong?" he began to panic at her words as she answered.

"Dad, I think I screwed up!" his daughter revealed with a sharp edge to her voice. "I said something to upset Eddie and then stepped out front for a few minutes to give her some space... I tried to apologize, but she didn't want to listen. When I came back both Marguerite and her were gone and the other patient here said Dr. Kenzie came out and got them and took her to the back. He said he heard her say there was some kind of complication, but I don't know what's happened! Jamie was supposed to come back to the room afterwards, and the anesthesiologist said we weren't allowed down there! I can't get in! Something's wrong and the doors are locked! No one is coming out! I can't believe she wouldn't send for me! I told her I was sorry and I need to know what's happening!"

"Sweetheart, now calm down. I'm on my way," Frank advised even as his own heart was thudding as he hurried to the elevator and punched the button for the ground floor. "I'm a half hour out and that much going through their security. Go back to his room and sit there and wait. I'm sure the nurse or someone else will come let you know if it's serious."

"No they won't! Eddie's mad at me and this is her fault! She had him all stressed out again before it started. That's the worst thing for him, Marguerite said so, and I sort of told her she needs to stop doing that, but then I apologized and said if I could take it back, I would," Erin rambled on. "I said that I know I'm not handling it right either because it's Jamie…" she trailed off in an uncomfortable silence. "I admitted sometimes I can get overprotective with him," she disclosed and heard an audible huff and the sound of the SUV door closing as her father got in the car and took in that understatement given his daughter's lifelong propensity to mother-hen his youngest to death. "You need to talk to her!" she insisted.

"Erin Marie," Frank sighed as he knew the last thing Eddie needed was an attack on another front, particularly one from within the family. "She's his wife now, and this is between them. I can't tell her how to handle things and neither should you."

"Dad, this is Jamie we're talking about… he's hurting himself because of it. Doesn't that matter to you?! She said that _I,"_ she emphasized bitterly. "That _I'm_ allowed to have my own opinion, but if I brought this up in front of him, I won't be welcome here. She actually thanked me for bringing some things from home to make him feel better… stuff she didn't even think of and then turned around and said 'You're his family and he loves you. I'm glad you want to do things to make him comfortable, and I appreciate everything you've done to help us, but wife trumps sister, and the last thing he needs right now is something else to worry about,' just like that!" she bristled. "She basically told me I have no say... that I can't even bring him his favorite mac and cheese and you want to trust her to make decisions for him?! She's threatening to keep us away, and after what happened when they first got together when he jumped off that bridge for Kaylin… you know he'll go along with that! He wouldn't even let me see the baby that time until I apologized to her!"

"ERIN REAGAN!" Frank exclaimed more sharply this time as he sought to quell his daughter's forward momentum even though he knew it was rooted in fear right now, and he prayed that by the time he got there they would know what was going on. "That's enough! You're out of line now for dredging up things out of the past like that. Go sit down in his room and wait for news and do not under any circumstances bring this up in front of Eddie when she comes back out. Call me back if you hear anything, otherwise if you can't be trusted to do that, you need to leave and I'll be there shortly. Understood?" came the direct order barked in his deep, no nonsense voice.

"I understand," Erin sighed when she heard that tone and kicked herself once more for bringing this to a head today of all days, but that little unveiled threat about keeping her away from her little brother stabbed at her heart a bit and set her lawyer brain in motion as if it was a custody case. What if Eddie followed through with that? Jamie had picked her and Kaylin over the family once before so it wasn't a stretch to think it could possibly happen again, and with him hurt and not in control of himself… the Reagans really had no say otherwise the way things stood anymore since his wife was considered next of kin. "I promise, not another word to upset them," she vowed openly wondering how her father was going to react to this when he got there after she had been told earlier not to step in. "I… I just want to stay and make sure he's okay. Please, Dad… get here soon."

"Lights and sirens, Jimmy," Frank ordered and sat back as the big black car sped ahead through city traffic, praying nothing bad had happened and they were already too late.

###

"Jamie… hey, that's it; lights on, lambchop. C'mon, you're okay now… please open those handsome eyes and look at me," Eddie implored as she held her husband's icy hand and attempted to help ease his way back out from under the anesthesia at Dr. Kenzie's request even as his eyelids fluttered before strong, violent shivering tremors began to resonate through his body while he emerged from the paralysis of the drugs. "I'm right here. Don't worry, everything's fine now, it's over. You're safe."

"Ed… w-why s'it s-so c-cold in h-here?" were the first intelligible words he managed before he was able to get his bearings. "Close t-the f-freakin' w-window for G-god's s-sake. H-hate being s-so c-cold."

"He's back, Billie," Kenzie called out and summoned her staff member into the recovery room to join them. "Well, to a point anyway," she added with a glance around the interior room with no wall openings evident.

"Still, that's a relief," the obviously shaken man admitted. "Kenzie wasn't kidding when she said you were a challenge, boy," Billie offered with a shake of his head as he stepped in to take some vitals. "Rebecca, let's get another one of those heated blankets on Sergeant Reagan," he directed. "Looks like it might take a little while to get his temp back up to normal."

"W-why?" Jamie repeated with a heavy swallow as his wits began to return and he sought answers. "M'm I s-shaking s-so h-hard?"

"You, son, had a humdinger of a reaction to my world-famous intravenous moonshine, patented on four continents and the pride and joy of every good old boy barbecue in the entire Republic of the glorious State of Texas," Billie explained as he took Jamie's pulse and noted with satisfaction that the heart rhythm was now stable. "Should have known city slicks like you can't handle the good stuff. We've got you under some warming blankets but you're probably gonna shiver like a horse shedding flies for a while here. Don't worry about it," he advised. "Three tours overseas and ten years in private practice… thought I'd seen everything," he griped. "Kenzie said you had some issues with confusion and delirium after the last round so I thought I was doing you a favor," he explained more plainly. "But your sissy metabolism totally didn't dig that drug cocktail combination I came up with. Vasodilation… your blood vessels opened up and relaxed like overcooked rigatoni which sent your pressure, heart rate and core temperature dropping like a ranger out of a huey after Al Qaeda with no chute on board."

"S-sorry, w-what?" Jamie's still muddled mind tried to follow the man's colorful description and heavy southern accent to no avail. "Ed? W-what d-did h-he s-ay? He had to s-shoot s-something?"

"You got cold... your blood pressure tanked which sent you into shock and you wound up a little hypothermic," Kenzie explained much more succinctly as she too was satisfied her patient had stabilized. "We managed to reverse the pressure and get you back on track pretty quickly after making sure there were no other problems. His spleen is fine," she paused to assure Eddie. "I was worried it was caused by a bleed, but the ultrasound was clean. He'll come around and warm up now that everything is wearing off. Rebecca, on the other hand, is probably scarred for life after she got a first day primer on curse words that even I didn't know Billie had in him after all these years."

"You held your own in there, sailor mouth," Billie rebuked. "Who do you think I learned half of them from?"

"Oh, so you're gonna go there and diss me now, Swanson?" Kenzie joked as she liked to stay light with her staff. "You sure know how to give the crew fits here," she chided and turned her attention back to Jamie. "I'm gonna start charging Rick extra for this, and he's already ducking my calls demanding takeout. 'I have to work extended shifts… the weather, Kenz,'" she mocked.

"So he's okay now, right?" Eddie asked and squeezed Jamie's still-cold and shaking hand in an effort to reassure them both after the fright of being suddenly summoned to the room by a concerned surgeon. "It was the drugs that did this and not something like stress," she worried with all-consuming guilt after recalling Erin's parting words.

"Well presurgical stress can cause issues, but in this case, not likely… the drugs, well, actually it was Jamie's super sensitive choir boy metabolism and its reaction to them this time that was the culprit," Kenzie assured. "You can't always predict that, and, yup… he's fine now or will be, and the harvest was successful. I extracted all the material necessary and closed up, but there was definitely some added jostling around back there while we worked on him so it was beneficial to have him come out of it calmly which is why I asked you back here, plus he's going to have to stay for monitoring a little longer than I told you to expect... I didn't want you to worry all that time," she explained in an effort to make an inroad with Eddie's trust since she was concerned what her reaction would be considering there was still another major surgery to come in just a few days time.

"But could this happen again?" Eddie asked nervously on the same wavelength although she was grateful to be kept so closely in the loop for a change even though she couldn't know Kenzie had done it on the down low with Marguerite posted on lookout duty and a request from the staff to keep it off of Wendell's radar. "You said the operation on Thursday would take a lot longer."

"Oh, no," Billie assured. "I mean there's always a slim chance of course, but fool me once, shame on you… fool me twice… well, nobody does that, Sergeant Reagan. We'll go back to what worked before, just don't be surprised if he's a bit more fuzzy mentally afterwards. Most people drop their temp in the first half hour of anesthesia and then the body's mechanisms bring it up to an acceptable level. Jamie apparently takes the trail less traveled sometimes, so he'll be prepped and pre-baked before he goes in again, plus I'll use warm air for ventilation. Heck, I'll toast him from the inside out like a marshmallow in a microwave if I have to."

"S-super," came the dry comment from the bed as the shakes were just beginning to subside a bit. "M'm sorry I s-scared you 'gain, Ed… but was g-glad you w-were h-here with m-me... you w-were r-right 'bout that. Where's 'rin?"

"Your sister is…" Eddie drawled out and stalled for time while coming up with an acceptable response that in no way, shape or form indicated there had been a kerfuffle between the two since surely Erin had returned to the room by now and had been informed there was a problem... more than forty-five minutes ago she realized with a wince after a glance at the clock. "...she's, um… well, she's probably just waiting for your Dad," she smoothed over truthfully while suddenly dreading the inevitable encounter about to come and praying that her father-in-law had already arrived to buffer it. "Remember? He said he'd be up to check on you after work."

"Oh, right. P'ease tell th'm m'm 'kay t-then."

"Everything's looking good," Kenzie assured as she scanned the monitors. "You can go out and let them know. Marguerite can buzz you back in when you're ready. Jamie will be in here until at least eight or so until I'm sure he's cleared the drugs from his system. They may not want to wait around that long."

"Let's hope," Eddie huffed under her breath. "You're okay if I go do that now?" she spoke out loud to her husband who seemed to be relaxing more comfortably as the tremors died down. "I won't be long."

"S'good… snug as a b-bug in a r-rug," he answered agreeably with a catch phrase from Kaylin and a reassuring return of that smirking sideways grin Eddie had not seen in what felt like forever. "G-gotta get one of t-hese for our bed, Ed," he referred to the warm blanket and then amused himself with a chuckle. "Ha… Ed, bed… get it? M'm just gonna rest my eyes now."

"Oh, good grief, speaking of buzzed. Wish I was too… and you never heard mommy say that out loud, munchie," Eddie murmured with a parting nod to Kenzie heavy sigh before dropping her head and walking out of the doorway and down the hall to face the Irish music waiting for her there. She was deeply relieved and paused to thank every deity possible after spotting Frank standing at the nurse's desk speaking to Marguerite alone. Perhaps there was a way clear now.

"Eddie," he called as the doors automatically opened for her. "How…?"

"He's fine..." she started to assure her father-in-law immediately without waiting and then trailed off when Erin emerged anxiously from Jamie's room and locked eyes on her. "He's out of surgery and in the recovery room… there was some trouble with the anesthesia again," she continued looking between the both of them before choosing pointedly to ignore Erin and focus on Frank. "He reacted to something new they tried and his pressure went low so they want to watch him some more. He's awake and talking… just a little cold and shivery, but that's going away now."

"Anesthesia or something else?" Erin questioned. "He's been cold all day… that's why he needed his blanket. Probably has low blood sugar from not eating anything..." she started and then caught her father's warning look, but could not help a parting comment. "Wish we would have known and not sat out here worried for so long… maybe you should let Dad go back and see him instead."

"Well, Dr. Kenzie needed to explain what happened, and asked _me_ to come back and sit with him while he woke up because he needed _me_ since she was afraid it was going to be rough on him because of the _drugs_ wearing off… so I kinda lost track of time while I was focused on _him..._ my apologies," Eddie bit back just enough to let Frank know clearly the tension was not dissipating between the two women. "The surgery is over… she got what she needed and he'll be back there until at least eight. You can go home now, I'm _handling_ it," she emphasized with another glance at Erin.

"What about you, sweetheart?" Frank tried to moderate gently. "You need some rest too if you're going back to work tomorrow. Don't worry… Pop is raring to come so he can sit with Jamie. He'll be here with bells on first thing in the morning. I'll have the detail bring him straight up from 1PP. I might drop in myself to check in during the afternoon if I can wiggle out of a budget meeting with the Mayor."

"I'll just stay until he's settled back in his room tonight. I have modified first shift at the precinct desk from here on out so I'll be fine… not like I'm in danger of anything worse than a paper cut anymore," she griped although the thought of another eight hour shift sharing space with Sergeant Dexter was less appealing than pulling ripe-smelling drunks out of an alley after an all-night bender. "Kaylin's better if she can sleep with me and I can drop her off at preschool and then Mom will pick her up and keep her for the afternoon while I come up here after work and visit for a few hours. It's only a half hour drive north from Midtown and traffic will be good on the way home. Excuse me, I'm going to go back in there now in case he needs _me._ I'll tell him you were here and call to let you know if anything changes, otherwise, I guess good night. Thanks for coming," Eddie added dismissively without a normal pause for hugs as she turned heel and waved to Marguerite who opened the doors as Frank and Erin just watched as she disappeared down the hall.

"Well that was enlightening," Erin sniped. "Did you see that, Dad? What did I tell you? She just sent us away… didn't even ask if we wanted to check on him ourselves. Imagine if she had tried to do that to Mom when she was alive. We have rights too!"

"Erin Reagan, Kenzie told us that area is off limits… I'm sure she's doing Eddie a special favor by allowing her to go back. Like she said, she's handling it and it's her place to be with him, and yes, your mother would have had a problem accepting that too… just like she had to bite her tongue when you and Jack were together and he wanted to keep her away when Nicki was born, or have you forgotten?"

"Forgotten what? Mom was there with me at the hospital when I had Nicki," Erin puzzled. "Jack would never have dared ask her not to be!" she insisted. "He knew how scared I was and how much I needed her help!"

"He most certainly did dare, and your mother dealt with it under the radar then made damn sure I kept my nose out of it too when I found out because she knew it would upset you if I walked in there to wring his neck… and there's no way we were going to have you worked up about something like that when you were nine months pregnant and all emotional. Eddie knows how much Jamie needs you and the rest of us, just like Jack knew you needed your mom to be there, but he didn't want to be told how to go about his role as a husband when he was scared and overwhelmed by becoming a father... and I use the term lightly considering how _that_ turned out," he huffed. "You need to realize how much Jamie needs Eddie while they go through this together and accept the fact that you have to keep to your role with a low profile if you want to be in the room with him."

"Under the radar, huh?" Erin commented thoughtfully as her brain whirred on fast forward and settled on a course of action that would ensure access to Jamie for the family in case it was needed… one that she was pretty confident she could slip past her impaired little brother without input from his wife… all it would take was a few legal papers drawn up. "You would have really wrung Jack's neck?" she smirked at her father who had unknowingly become part of the plan now too.

"Still tempted every time I see him. Never liked the guy," he affirmed and pulled her elbow around to lead her toward the exit.

* * *

 _Ruh-roh, looks like Jamie's not the only one feeling a cold chill right now, and that might very well persist for a while as Erin sets her plan in motion and tries to draw Frank into it. She might also find an unlikely source of support as a certain grandfather is rattled to the core and reminded of feelings past after a visit reveals the extent of the damage and offers a waking introduction to a certain source of inspiration from down the hall._


	45. Chapter 45

Chapter 45

"Excuse me, ma'am… I'm looking for my grandson, Jamison Reagan," a dapper-looking gray-haired gentleman in a tan overcoat and hat announced after he successfully passed through the multiple layers of security to arrive bright and early at precisely nine o'clock in front of Marguerite's desk with a crisp kraft-paper shopping bag at his side filled with expert-level crossword puzzles, the morning editions of the papers and a small bag of Wilder's iced oatmeal cookies that had been stealthily pilfered from Frank's hidden personal stash that morning before the two men left home.

"Commissioner Reagan," she greeted him warmly. "I was told to expect you. Please have a seat over there… Jamie will be finishing up with his morning PT in a few minutes, so you'll be able to go in shortly," she nodded towards the room across the hall which had the vertical blinds drawn closed for privacy.

"Oh, it's just Henry now, please. Leave the Commissioner title for my son. You must be Marguerite… I have something for you and Janet," he smiled before setting the bag down on the floor and reaching inside to pull out two artfully decorated glass mason jars with tags proclaiming 'Bless Your Sweet Hands for Caring' and filled to the rim with a lemon sugar scrub mixture... he'd been stocking up annually on a supply of them at the church bazaar in these later years since more often than he would like to admit his time was now spent visiting friends in places like this or attending their funerals afterwards. "I've heard that someone related to me here has been giving the two of you a run for your money so I came bearing gifts. My wife was a nurse when we were first married," he explained. "She taught me always to pamper the ones in charge."

"Well, it's clear to see where the Commissioner and your grandsons inherited their charm," Marguerite nodded in appreciation. "Thank you, Henry… that boy of yours will be the death of me though," she conceded. "Between him and this one I have to keep constant watch, but at least I don't have to worry about Jamie wandering off just yet without permission... I see you Quincy Johnson," she chided with a frown at the reflection on the overhead mirror before turning to catch her other charge as he was coyly trying to inch closer the wheelchair the physical therapist had left in the room behind her back. "We'll have none of that until Aaron and Dr. Kenzie approves the use of it. Now sit back down in your bed before I take it out," she ordered. "And don't think I don't know about your nightly visitor sneaking in here."

"Yes, ma'am," Quincy sighed as he complied. "Just going a little stir crazy today, and it's not like I don't know how to use one of these things… got plenty of experience the last few years," he reminded.

"And you are a mere three days post surgery… I'll not have you try to get into that chair alone and fall so you undo all our hard work. Sit or I'll turn the bed alarm on so not to worry over you while I take my break to run down to the lunchroom for some tea," she warned again.

"Well," Henry started as he looked into the room knowing that both Frank and Eddie had mentioned that the other patient in this area hadn't had a visitor all weekend to their knowledge. "If Mr…?"

"Johnson," Marguerite filled in knowingly.

"If Mr. Johnson will have me, I'll stand guard in there a bit until you get back and Jamie is finished. I have a lifetime of experience in keeping prisoners under lock and key," he joked and moved over to the doorway. "Would you mind some company, young man?"

"No, that would be fine, sir," Quincy replied with interest as he sat up straight and pulled the covers flat before Henry noticed the full extent of his situation and the now-obvious vacancy under the blanket where the vast majority of his left leg should be. "Please have a seat, but just Quincy is fine."

"Henry Reagan," the older man introduced himself with a firm handshake and without missing a beat or a note of pity in a well-polished manner that had taken years to perfect. "I understand from my sources you are a decorated Navy SEAL. Very impressive. Marines for me… 1st Division, Inchon, Korea… one of the old dogs still kicking… well, now that I have a new hip, anyway," he laughed. "Maybe you heard of us."

" _The Navy and Marines have never shone more brightly than this morning,"_ Quincy quoted with obvious respect. "Douglas S. MacArthur as he observed the amphibious assault from the sea on September 15, 1950. It's an honor, sir."

"The same. Do you like oatmeal cookies, Quincy?"

###

"Hey girlfriend! It's about time you got here! I saw you put in for modified finally and was just about to check the duty roster again to see if you got sick of Dexter and transferred to 1PP without telling me. Where have you been, Reagan?" Kara Walsh demanded as her friend entered the women's changing room at the 12th precinct just before the morning briefing. "You haven't been returning my calls… Wait! What's wrong?" she cried as she saw her friend's expression as Eddie came in and sat down heavily in front of her locker. "Did something happen? Please tell me it's not the baby!"

"No… Kara, I mean I need to talk to you about that later. Not too many people know, but Jamie had an accident last Wednesday down in Washington," Eddie revealed sadly. "We're trying to keep it quiet because of all the… stuff, you know that goes on with the family, but he, um… got hit by a car crossing the street… he's hurt pretty bad."

"OH NO! My God! That's awful!" Kara exclaimed as she slid over on the bench for an immediate hug. "I had no idea! Why didn't you call me sooner? Wilson told me he was going to check on you the other day, but he never said anything was wrong after that, so I didn't think! I'm so sorry… but you're here?" she questioned. "Where is…?"

"Jamie's at Columbia up in northern Manhattan. There's a surgeon there… well, she was actually down in DC when it happened and Rick Fellows knows her, but that's a long story and anyway they flew him back up here Thursday night. His leg was broken in a couple places… some other stuff. He's had three surgeries already… one yesterday, that's why I called in again after the suspension… there's another big one on Thursday afternoon. I'm not sure what to do about that… I've gotta be there Kara. I can't leave him alone; he's had all these complications," she finally broke. "It's bad and I'm scared… he could still lose it," she admitted.

"Seriously?!… Okay, Eddie, honey… deep breath now, that's not gonna happen, and you will be there for him… we've all got your back here and I'll pull a double and take your shift if I have to. Lord knows you've bailed my butt out with Brandon and his sniffles more times than I can count. Matt's home this week so I'm good. I'll clear it with Wilson and I will sit with a smile pasted on my face in front of Dexter the entire time so he better not say one word or I swear I'll turn around and shoot him myself. I still can't believe this. What about Kaylin?" she worried. "Who's taking care of her when you can't be home?"

"Henry's been there and my mom flew in," Eddie admitted and tried not to notice Kara's eyebrows arch up in surprise as she recalled the encounters with Eva Janko at the wedding. "She's trying hard… we're making it work," she insisted and tried once more to force herself to believe it.

###

"This is never gonna work," Jamie sighed as Aaron was finishing up the morning PT session. "I'm supposed to go home next week and I can't even lift my good leg by myself," he lamented. "How am I gonna get out of bed? My wife is pregnant… I can't ask her to do all this or help me move around. She has an important appointment at the OB next week too," he stressed. "She'll have to go alone… Jesus, I'm actually worse than yesterday, aren't I? That's what Marla said when she was here to torture me with those little blue puffing balls earlier… she said she's coming back later for more. What is it with you people?" he griped. "You were the type of kids to pull wings off flies, weren't you?"

"Jamie, take a breath. Of course you're gonna be less mobile after the surgery on your hip since it's numb too right now," the other man answered as he ignored the barb hurled in frustration. "Every day you spend laid up is going to take a day and a half to overcome, but we're not going to judge from that or send you anywhere unless you can manage safely, so try not to get hung up on it. Once the fixator comes off on Thursday the real work starts. I understand you want to be home with your family a few days a week. We'll build towards that, and until then the stepdown unit is a lot better than this ward… there's more patients down that hall and visitor interaction is allowed downstairs plus you'll be out and about some more. There's even an open gym."

"A gym," Jamie gave a frustrated half-laugh. "Like that's gonna help."

"It will," the therapist assured.

"I'm kinda more worried about what happens when all of this _isn't_ numb anymore," Jamie admitted as his hand searched down his right side to finger the newly bandaged area from the work done yesterday. "Feels like half my body is missing in action right now, and sometimes I wish the other half would go join it."

"That, my friend, will require balance," Aaron advised as he walked over and opened the blinds. "You'll need to find a way to medicate enough so you can push through without overdoing it and making yourself too loopy."

"Fat chance of that," Jamie sighed as the therapist opened the door and departed to the left in the hall with a wave and a promise of return the next morning as he headed for his next stop in Quincy's room which soon saw Henry scurrying back around the corner anxiously.

"There you are… finally! If you would only know how hard it is to get in…" he greeted before allowing an "Aw, kiddo," to spill out uncharacteristically with that usually veiled pity evident once he took in his grandson's current state. "Jesus, Mary and Joseph!" he added before Jamie managed to flip the blanket back over his leg and cover up the now familiar source of reactions like that.

"Hey, Pop… don't," he warned as he saw the tears well up in Henry's eyes and he felt himself getting overemotional too as the old man approached and put his shaky hands on him for a hug and a kiss on top of the head. "Please don't go there; I just did something stupid again... I'm gonna be okay," he added with little conviction.

"Of course you are, you're a Reagan," his grandfather managed to get out of his tight throat after a few moments. "I'm so sorry, son," he added and stared back in shock at how frail and broken the boy looked in that bed. After spending the last twenty minutes or so with his new friend in the next room, he had acclimated himself to that level of trauma, but Quincy looked strong, and daresay healthy except for the missing appendage and the bandages covering what little was left. Jamie, on the other hand, seemed like a small child again and Henry was reminded of the fright he had felt that time the youngster had taken a headfirst fall down the steps of his home and ended up pale, unconscious and bleeding on the landing with his normally stalwart Grandma Betty frantically hovering over his still body. For an instant that day he thought they had lost him forever, and that defeated look in Jamie's eyes right now sent the same chill through his heart. Despite the knowledge of what happened, he had not prepared himself to see that.

"So what did you bring me?" Jamie tried to deflect from that stare… was it disappointment that he saw in Henry's expression? "I swear I smell oatmeal," he continued hopefully. "Tell me you raided Dad's stash," he tried to joke to lighten the apparent tension. "How'd you find it this week?"

"Good detective work," Henry retorted before the words caught again and his heart pulled as he saw his grandson's countenance pinch with sadness and remorse once more. "I… I hope you don't mind too much but I shared some with your friend in the next room… Francis said no one has visited that he saw so I chatted with him while I was waiting for you," he explained.

"Course I don't mind, Pop," Jamie assured. "I haven't really met him face-to-face yet either," he added without realizing Quincy and Commander Rigsby had already been by twice under the cover of night to check on him in an effort to quell their boredom and curiosity.

"Well, he thinks he'll be allowed in a wheelchair today after his PT session, so I invited him over here for lunch if he's able," Henry revealed as he forced himself to move beyond standing and gawking before taking a seat next to the bed and reaching down in his bag to pull out the promised cookies as well as a crossword and copies of the papers that he laid on Jamie's tray in easy reach. "Marguerite said she would allow it… you could both use the distraction to give her a break, maybe we can catch a replay of the game from the other night. No reason for him to sit alone over there. Did you know he was a SEAL that he lost his leg in Afghanistan and your doctor is reconstructing everything so he'll finally be able to use one of those fancy wooden legs and walk on his own again?"

"It's called a prosthesis, Pop," Jamie corrected with a telling sigh as the specter of that possibility had crossed his mind also so the knowledge that he was about to face someone in that current situation was a little unnerving. "They're made out of carbon fiber now. Cost more than Eddie's car and probably have more fancy-shmancy electrical circuits on them than it does."

"That heap of junk," Henry gruffed before catching himself revealing more than he has promised to. "I mean, uh… technology has sure come a long way since back in my day," he covered having promised to keep the news of the car's mechanical woes moot for now. "Time moves forward, Jamie and so does everything else. You'll see," he tried to encourage before pausing while adjusting his glasses. "In a few weeks things will look better. Now, I've got one of those daily inspiration themed puzzles here and it's got me stumped. I need a ten-letter word for 'a continuing after interruption; a renewal'… just like you will do after this. Third letter 's'..."

"Resurgence."

###

"So glad to see you've decided to grace us with your presence, Officer Reagan," Sergeant Dexter remarked snidely from the main desk behind her as he took his seat later that morning after returning from a meeting just before lunch when the room was otherwise empty except for one of the new patrolmen filing a report for his TO. "I was actually able to get some of my own work done today instead of covering for you. Good thing you ride with a man for a partner, Gilbert," he projected to the other officer. "Otherwise the car would be pulled over half the day while the ladies attend to their feminine needs."

Eddie just rolled her eyes at the continuation of the same anti-mommy cop theme she'd be facing for the foreseeable future and focused on Jamie's words from that incident when she was a rookie and had become the subject of an IA investigation. A video had surfaced and the DA's office purported she had lied about where she retrieved a stolen phone from a perp during an arrest… it had been her first and almost last month on the job if it hadn't been for a certain Commissioner Reagan standing up for her. _Keep your head down and your mouth shut,_ his son… her partner... had advised. Oh, that was so hard for a Janko woman as evident by the last forty-eight hours...

"C'mon Reagan, you called in sick yesterday. Where's the fake cough?"

 _Oops, he's right… make that Reagan now,_ she thought. _If anything it puts a bigger target on my back, just like Jamie said… head down, mouth shut… this is my job now and I have to make the best of it. You won't get a pass because of who your old man, or rather, father-in-law is, and he's gonna look for every reason to put a mark on your record._

"If I would have had the manpower, I'd have sent a unit to your house to confirm that you weren't just out getting your nails done… would have been my pleasure to issue you another rip," Dexter continued to threaten predictably. "You might think desk-work is beneath your privileged nameplate, but that's not the case here."

"I banged in due to a family emergency," Eddie corrected evenly and rebuffed herself immediately for getting drawn into an argument with her superior so quickly despite of her attentions as the light began to flash on an incoming line and she clicked to answer. "Good morning, 12th precinct. Officer Reagan speaking. How may I direct your call?"

"Is that code for having a mommy makeover at the salon?" came the snarky comment back from the sergeant.

"Excuse me, ma'am, would you please repeat that? Can you speak up? Where are you located?" Eddie ignored him as she caught the obvious distress in the caller's voice and she focused in. "Ma'am please calm down. I can't understand what you're saying," she continued while snapping her fingers and pointing for the rookie to come over. "10-52 at Second and Amsterdam, 207, woman calling from a cell phone in a closet is reporting an armed intruder in the hall of the apartment building there trying to break in," she whispered and handed over a note with the address. "Third floor. Call it into Central and have them roll multiple units. I'm going to try to keep her on the line and get more info."

"That's 3-5's territory, Officer Reagan," Dexter reminded as he caught on to the location. "Don't these twits know they should call 911 and not the wrong precincts?"

"Ma'am, do you know this person?" Eddie asked as her training took over. "Roland Waters," she reported to Gilbert who continued to relay the information to dispatch. "Ex-husband, she has a current PFA on him. Priors for stalking, domestic assault and weapons charges," she reported as she pulled the information up on her screen. "And your name is? Avery Waters. Okay Avery, I'm with you. Just stay quiet for now and listen to me, okay? I have the police rolling to your location… someone will be there any second, I promise. Just keep yourself hidden until the officers have him and I tell you it's safe to come out," she advised as her adrenaline was surging since mentally she was with this terrified woman hiding in the closet and she desperately willed the RMPs dispatched from the 3-5 to arrive.

"I hear the sirens," Eddie reported in a whisper as her eyes were darting back and forth while she strained to listen. "Oh, God," she mouthed. "I think he just broke the door in… he's in the apartment. Stay quiet… stay quiet… they're coming," she assured.

"NYPD!" came a somewhat familiar sounding shrill shout. "ROLAND WATERS... PUT THE GUN DOWN AND SHOW US YOUR HANDS!" before a series of three sudden loud bangs made Eddie jump in her seat and she heard Avery scream "NOOO! STOP! ROLAND PLEASE!" as she was pulled from her hiding space in the hall closet.

"10-13, shots fired," Gilbert reported as he listened to the dispatch on his radio. "One officer down. Suspect somehow bolted the door and barricaded himself in with them… they're sending for ESU and a hostage negotiator."

"YOU CALLED 5-0 ON ME?!" Eddie could hear Waters yelling at his wife with Avery's cries in the background. "WELL LISTEN TO THIS!" Eddie jumped as the man grabbed the phone off the floor and screamed into it at full volume. "I AIN'T COMING OUT OF HERE WITHOUT HER and if you try to come in for me, I'LL PUT ANOTHER HOLE IN THIS PRETTY LITTLE RED-HEADED COP I GOT NOW TOO!" before the line clicked dead.

 _10-13... Officer down from the 3-5… hostage situation…_ Eddie shook visibly as her eyes came up in disbelief... this was Jamie's platoon, surely not... _pretty little red-headed cop…_

"Gilbert, who rolled on that call?" she managed to ask out loud, truthfully terrified to hear someone confirm which officer had been shot and was now held captive alone without backup in that apartment between a volatile Roland Waters and his ex-wife while her own intensely duty-bound husband was trapped in a hospital bed in northern Manhattan and unable to help.

"3-5 Charles was first in," he answered, clearly upset himself. "I'm hearing Patterson and Anderson… isn't that Sergeant Reagan's rookie partner...?"

Annabel.

* * *

 _Well, it's been awhile since we touched base with spunky Annabel Anderson and the other characters at the 3-5 and 12th. Bet you didn't miss Dexter too much though, lol… don't worry, he'll come to regret those nasty words of his at some time in the not-too-distant future. To this point the rest of the OC's and regulars have been kept out of the loop over what transpired in Washington, but after these events a few of them might have cause to rejoin the action here. Next, a nice long chapter as Jamie watches with Henry in disbelief while things with his platoon play out live in a breaking newscast while Quincy picks what eventually turns out for him to be an opportune time to wheel over for a visit._


	46. Chapter 46

Chapter 46

"Gin," Henry declared as he laid his cards down on the tray. "Let's see, that's 204 points for me," he revealed as he tallied up the score. "C'mon, put some effort into it, son. You could have picked up that four of spades for a run and gone out. You must have been dealt that pretty much from the get go… you don't have to let me win. I might be old, but I'm not senile yet."

"I… I just didn't see it," Jamie replied truthfully even though normally he would have jumped at the chance to win a game against his fiercely competitive grandfather. Right now, however, such concentrated thought processes... which so far had also included crossword puzzles and word searches... were seemingly beyond him and frustrating to the core. With his mobility already severely limited, acknowledging that his mind was dulled too was like taking another hit from a double-edged sword. "I'm tired, Pop. Can we just stop?"

"Of course," Henry agreed with a small hidden frown. Thus far his attempts to interest the boy in things intended to help pass the time had proven essentially fruitless. "You'll probably get your lunch soon so we can clear this off," he added as he emptied the tray. "Maybe Eddie will call when she goes on her break. How about some television until then? Noontime news is coming on."

"Sounds good," Jamie replied with little joy as he contemplated maybe taking a hit from the happy button as Kenzie liked to call it and drifting away for a bit since he was tired from PT and uninterested in eating. Still his grandfather had mentioned that Quincy was going to join them shortly if he was able and judging by the enthusiastic sounds emanating from next door earlier his ward mate had successfully earned his chair privileges so it would be rude to tune him out right off the start. That was the one thing that held his curiosity right now… wondering what this other man was like in person after a few days of imagining who he might be from the voice and the stories he had been hearing.

"Eh, let's see… New York One would be on… channel thirty-two," Henry huffed as he adjusted his glasses and studied the patient info card. "Of course, that makes perfect sense," he griped as he tuned to the desired station. "These hospitals can't make anything easy. Don't tell your grandmother, but the weathergirl they have working the midday is easy on the eyes," he joked and tuned in. "I never miss a forecast."

"Hand to God," Jamie promised with at least a trace of a smirk at the older man's guff as he lay back and imagined Grandma Betty's reaction to that little tidbit had she still been alive, determined to at least rest his eyes for a short time before the familiar tones of a breaking news story caught his attention and focus.

"Huh, look at that," Henry commented as he fumbled to bring the volume up while the screen showed shaky live streaming video from what appeared to be a cell phone. "It says there's a hostage situation somewhere on Amsterdam. ESU is rolling up. Looks like they've got an actual camera crew there on scene now," he added as the picture soon switched to a clearer and steadier version.

"That's an apartment house at Second," Jamie observed as he recognized the street and sat up straighter suddenly with a heavy grimace. "3-5's territory… my guys are there," he added as he anxiously scanned the footage for the responding officers and the two Reagans watched as members of the tactical team fanned out and took up positions surrounding the building while a number entered from the front and went inside. Soon though, Jamie picked up on a familiar figure coming back outside. "That's Patterson running over to the command center… he's my other regular TO," he added with a nervous gut twist that told him something was very wrong. "Annabel would be riding with him since I'm out. Ehret and Rossi are to the right by the cruiser… I don't see her. She has to be there, Pop… there's a lot of units rolling in for a single shooter," he added nervously with his eyes glued to the screen.

"Well, he probably just put her back under cover somewhere out of trouble where she's supposed to be," Henry offered at the rising sound of concern in his grandson's voice since he knew he took his position as an NYPD sergeant and training officer dead seriously… right now everything else was forgotten including broken bones and the pain that any small movement brought… that was his rookie partner and the rest of his platoon out there, and the older man had no doubt if he was at all physically able to that Jamie would have been dragging himself out the door and be on his way to the scene already.

"Not Annabel, she always jumps in too soon… we've been working on that. She knows to stay behind me, but Patty sometimes lets her lead," he fretted.

"Sometimes you've got to let the probies do that, son… you can't always coddle them. When they're ready, they have to learn."

"She's _not_ ready… too gung-ho yet. Jesus, I promised her father I would look out for her, and I'M HERE, DAMN IT!"

"This is Marne Taylor, New York One," the reporter on scene announced and silenced both men as they focused on her and the shot switched to a view from her vantage point down the block even as she was still struggling to adjust her microphone and put her earpiece in. "Jim and Melanie," she advised the anchors back at the station. "I can confirm the reports of at least one hostage and a gunman barricaded in that building. I'm also hearing on the police scanners that they're calling shots fired and a 10-13. That's NYPD signal code for an officer down or in trouble," she explained. "At this point I don't have any further information on what that involves… no ambulances have left the scene. We don't know if officers fired on the suspect or the other way around. I do know that there's a strong police presence growing here and the entire block is being evacuated. Chopper One is above us and will be providing further coverage from the safety of the skycam," she added as the cameraman panned down the block and caught Renzulli jumping out of his car and hurrying into the command truck himself.

"Oh, God… a 10-13," Jamie barely breathed as he wrapped his left arm around his broken ribs which were crackling and protesting these sudden movements vehemently now. "Where the eff in Annabel?! Pop, where is she?" he demanded as he pushed himself over and accidentally snagged his IV line, pulling the tape up and dislodging the line, causing a fairly impressive steady ooze of blood to well up and trickle down his arm unnoticed onto the sheets below. "Damn it! Who's down? We gotta find out who's down! Why isn't anyone bringing them out?"

"Jamie, son! You need to calm yourself… you don't even know if anything's happened yet, and dear God in Heaven, you're bleeding!" Henry finally noticed as he hurried out to the door to summon Marguerite who was uncharacteristically nowhere to be found, having stepped into the ladies room for a moment figuring her two charges were well settled. Instead it was Quincy who was curious about the ruckus in the adjoining room and sensing an opportunity had pulled himself into his chair to wheel over and see if he could be of any assistance to the nice old man who had just shared war stories and filled him full of oatmeal cookies meant for this curious grandson of his.

"Henry, is there anything I can do… oh, crap, you've gotta get some pressure on that!" he insisted as he quickly brought the chair bedside and turned his attention to Jamie instead. "Hate when this happens… you're gonna raise a huge bruise from it and Nurse Simmons will have your head in her sights for messing up the sheets! Here, slap one of these gauze pads on him and tape it down," he advised after reaching over to the supply cart and providing the required items after ripping off the packaging with his teeth. "Quincy Johnson, good to meet you," he offered Jamie by way of mumbled explanation as he handed Henry the pad and several strips of tape. "What's going on?"

"Hostage situation with a gunman," Henry answered instead while he wadded up the gauze and put it in place as all Jamie could do is stare back speechless at an introduction like that, his brain not even registering the fact that this young, athletic-looking African-American man was missing everything that he was now struggling to keep before his eyes lifted back towards the screen and his throat tightened once more as the apparent standoff continued with no sign of Annabel… all these years he had worried about Eddie being in a situation like this, and now she was safely at a desk back at the 12th while his men and this particular young woman were out there without him. "It's Jamie's NYPD platoon out of the 3-5," his grandfather continued for him as the bedside phone began to ring. "He thinks his rookie training partner might be in some trouble there, excuse me," he added as he picked up when Jamie balked, unable to speak and fearful for what he would hear.

"Oh, man," Quincy commiserated as he skillfully reoriented his chair to watch the coverage which had switched to the overhead view. "That sucks. He ready for it?"

"She…" Jamie managed only a one word reply at first before finally stuttering out the rest. "I… I don't know…"

"No, it's too late," Henry was advising whoever was on the phone and Jamie's eyes snapped over in shock at the words. "No, I don't mean _that_ … it's Eddie," the older man explained before turning his attention back. "He's already seen it, sweetheart. No, I know… I can't," Henry advised in a hushed tone with a nervous and guilty look over at the drug pump. "He's pulled out his IV, we need to get the nurse back before he can have any…"

"You're _not_ drugging me, Pop," Jamie warned in a hiss as he caught on to his wife's plan. "What does she know?" he demanded, now certain and fearful of bad news and that Eddie was trying preemptively to put him down before he heard and could do himself harm over it. "TELL ME!"

"He needs to know what's happening, he's worried over Annabel… no, I know his blood pressure… Honey, you just have to tell me now. Give it to me straight…" Henry stated back into the receiver. "Son of a...," he sighed after listening for a few seconds and glancing at the screen while Jamie's heart fell. "Eddie took the call from the desk at the 12th," he relayed intermittently. "She was on the phone with her… woman was in the closet, armed ex-husband with a PFA banging on the door and broke in before Anderson and Patterson could get there and stop him. Three shots fired when they breached the doorway," he summarized with a sigh from his granddaughter-in-law's viewpoint. "Both officers took rounds. Patterson fell back out in the hall and the suspect barricaded himself in with Anderson and the wife. He's pretty certain Annabel took the first one to the center of the vest… it's a .22 semi pistol, should have stopped it. Second one went in his and he's fine, not even a bruise, but he's not sure where the third bullet went…" he reported as Eddie purposefully left out the part about Roland Water's claim of having put a hole in a cop with a threat to repeat the action. "She says the hostage negotiator on scene is Kline… you know him?"

"Yeah," Jamie rasped even as he felt suddenly lightheaded with blood pounding in his ears as he tried to process that information while his adrenaline was surging as if he was there in the hall with the officers himself. "Um… he's good… at least okay, I think... Brooklyn North. She took one to the vest? Those new FN Five-Seven handguns fire at such a high speed they can punch through kevlar, Pop…" he trailed off in worry as his mind searched for the catalogued information that usually came instantly and easily from his eidetic memory. "We… uh, got a warning issued about them a couple of weeks ago after an incident in Boston, I think… God, someone has to call Bill and her mom," he offered more weakly as his head fell back against the pillow while the room started to spin downward in a slow, lazy spiraling circle just as Marguerite returned to her station and then hurried back across the hall to see why her tightly run ward had suddenly devolved and everyone was gathered in there. "I think m'm supposed to do that."

"Quincy Johnson, what are you doing… Oh, my goodness!" she exclaimed as her eyes fell to the now blood-soaked square on Jamie's arm and the detached tubing and then immediately centered on the monitor which was showing rising numbers in areas she did not want to see them. "Sergeant Reagan! Commissioner! What on God's green earth is going on in here! Out! Everyone out!" she demanded.

"No, let'um stay," Jamie countered with closed eyes, fighting off the nausea from his swirling vision. "Please, gotta know what's happening. Just let me listen... I can help. It's my job."

"Jamie's officers… his young partner… they're involved in a hostage situation in the city," Henry explained briefly but with obvious concern, and there was no way he was leaving his grandson at this point unless forced out bodily no matter who thought they were in charge. "It came on the news and he accidentally pulled his IV trying to sit up too fast. Quincy came over to help when I couldn't find you."

"He's hypertensive. I need to fix this and get his pressure down," Marguerite contended as she pulled over the supplies and started to rip off the dressing which had already successfully staunched the blood flow and ready another site. "You need to turn that coverage off immediately. I have to look after him no matter what… that's _my_ job."

"And he has to see this through and look after them, ma'am," Henry added inherently knowing what was needed and that this woman would understand given her professional background before turning back to the bed. "We can't ignore this… that'll only make it worse. I know my grandson. Now, Jamie, it's most likely not one of those new semis… Patterson is fine and he was hit at the same distance. I'm betting an old .22 this skel had in a closet somewhere. Annabel probably just got knocked back, and she's fine so we've got one of our own with eyes and ears in there. You trained her. Now walk it through and help this guy Kline do his job and get them out," he ordered. "C'mon, what would she be doing? How would she react?"

"Talking," Jamie croaked out even though he knew that wasn't his grandfather's style or what he would have wanted to hear in his day… by now he'd have probably ordered ESU in guns blazing, to hell with the soft approach, and it's the last thing Danny would have liked either, but this was Annabel… his style, his trainee. "Crisis negotiation 101. Build trust and empathize. Patience… this might take a while," he rattled off. "Annabel knows not to rush… we've done role-playing for hours in the car. She'll listen to him. If she can, she'll get him to talk and walk. If that's not going down, she'll stay calm and keep his focus on her and off the other woman… she'll try to get him in front of the window or isolated in the middle of the room so if they have to go in there hot there will be a clear shot. There's a word… "Harvard"... Eddie knows all this… my guys all know. Patterson should be in there telling him. Tell Ed to patch into Kline or get to Renzulli and make sure he's listening. They have to have ears by now. If they hear it they need to take the shot or bust in. If she's still playing him, she won't use it."

"Jamie, we need to drop your head down a bit and lower your leg," Marguerite explained in the background as talk continued between the Reagans. "I'm sorry if that's uncomfortable, but you need to try to relax and show improvement or I will be forced to call Dr. Kenzie for a med order," she warned.

"She'll do it too, man. I tell, ya she's a real..." Quincy cautioned while forgetting himself before adding a "Sorry, ma'am," when he caught an evil eye from the nurse. "Minding my own business now..." he trailed off with a sheepish grimace.

"Eddie, he wants you to talk to Kline… he says you know… right… okay, I understand. She's already done that, Jamie," Henry assured over his shoulder. "Renzulli's on it. ESU has a mic in at the door but no video. They can hear her… this guy won't pick up the phone for the negotiator, but Tony says Annabel is handling herself like a ten-year veteran… doing all the things you said. She sounds good and strong," he continued to point out the positive as he hung up the phone. "Eddie will get back to us if there's any news… that Sergeant Dexter is giving her grief about tying up the line right now," he explained. "We just have to sit tight and have faith in your boot, son. You've trained her and Eddie both, two good cops."

"Just three months, and that's not what Danny thinks… don't forget I trained George too, and he washed out," Jamie reminded his grandfather about his second rookie straight out of the academy who had failed to overcome a number of personal phobias on the street, but fulfilled his potential once a move to 1PP's statistical division materialized.

"Nah, that boy just wasn't in the right place, you knew that and besides when the chips were down he faced his fears and stayed to save you when you were both trapped in that basement and then helped bring down that whole Denison conspiracy… Francis says he's done more for CompStat in the last year than any other analyst. You bring out the best in these rookies, Jamie," Henry encouraged. "They listen and respect you because you always find their niche and encourage them… that's a gift you share with your father."

"Shared, Pop," Jamie corrected quietly with a heavy emphasis on the past tense that had his grandfather's concern mount at the measure of defeat in that tone once more.

"Now, Jamison, I…" Henry started before everyone's attention was drawn back to the screen as the images shifted to the helicopter view once more and the reporter was eagerly pointing out the position of a sniper on one of the adjacent rooftops. "Oh, for the love of all that's almighty and holy!" Henry griped angrily as he started to pace and wave his hands in the air. "Francis is going to chew these people up in little bits and spit them out on the eleven o'clock news when he sees that… giving away real-time tactical positions. Don't they realize this nut might have the TV on? How are we supposed to do our jobs that way?!"

"What's worse is that guy set himself up in totally the wrong spot," Quincy observed before two pairs of Reagan eyes fell back on him. "The flags," he pointed out on screen that were intermittently just barely ruffling in the picture. "Near side of the street left, up top right… there's a crosswind he'd be fighting, air rising from the pavement plus the angle of the sun would put glare on the glass from where he's at. Dude should have gone out a window up a story in that building to the left and stayed in the shadows. Wouldn't have been spotted by the chopper or the target that way either," he shrugged. "My opinion only."

"You sound like you know what you're talking about, son," Henry noted gently.

"Yes, sir. USMC Scout Sniper Qualified… sold my Navy SEAL soul to the Marine Devils… with respect," he qualified with a slight grin after catching himself and remembering which branch of the service Henry was attached to. "Spent two months of hell on earth there in another lifetime that is," he admitted to what was well known as one of the most prestigious titles from arguably the top sniper training program in the country. "Guess it's hard to remember that sometimes."

"Gentlemen!" Marguerite chirped. "Might I remind you two there is a patient in crisis here!" she continued to worry over Jamie, although progress had been made on balancing his vital signs so she decided to hold off on any further intervention since her primary charge had seemed to be settled back on the bed for the moment with his eyes closed and right hand up to shield them. The comment about another lifetime… surely what he as facing now too if the last two days of PT were any indication. Never again would he be out on the street with his officers when they needed him… his rookies, the ones he enjoyed riding with and guiding… the life he chose. There would be no more new stories for him to share around the dinner table, and he flashed back on that conversation had with Laura Peck when the whole Blue Templar thing had come to a head and he found himself ousted once more and relegated to the role of a beat cop. He hadn't minded so much then and tried to explain to her why the job was so important to him and the rest of the family.

" _Well, it wasn't a lightning bolt exactly," he had recalled while sitting there in his maroon Harvard hoodie with the pretty brunette set for a job interview with a museum in Abu Dhabi to retreat from her father's financial indiscretions… funny how that mirrored Eddie's situation, he mused. The two were sharing dinner in her hotel room while he was charged with protecting her after a kidnapping attempt. "But I was sitting around with a bunch of other 1-L classmates at dinner one night and everyone was talking about what firms offer what starting salaries and what bonus so and so got their second year at Dewey, Screwem and Howe."_

" _But that's any grad school... law, med," she had reminded as she sipped on a glass of wine while he tried to ignore the obvious mutual physical attraction the two held for one another._

" _Right, but what struck me is… and this is going to sound naïve or idealistic or whatever, but I don't care because it's true… in all those years of family dinners, I never once heard them talk about the job in terms of what they made. I mean, what they made just wasn't the reason they did what they did."_

" _What was?"_

" _The work itself…. um, you know, the stories that you lived to tell. I mean, you could sit my dad or my brother down next to a king, a rock star, a billionaire, I… I don't care, that person is going to ask for just one more story all night long," he had revealed with eyes flashing in excitement and satisfaction in his voice that he was also part of that life now too._

" _So you became a cop to be the most sought-after guest at dinner parties," Laura had deadpanned with a sincere laugh and warm smile._

" _Yes... yeah," he had chuckled. "Um, I became a cop to make a difference in… in a good way, a real way, and if I get to live some great stories along the way, that's just icing on the cake."_

A good way, a real way… no more, Jamie lamented to himself in the present. Just like his grandfather... from now on he'd be destined to relive old stories and watch from afar on the news and question their actions against the own training he had to offer them… which he prayed would see them through just this one more time and bring Annabel and the other woman out of this situation safely.

"Hey, looks like something's happening!" Quincy warned on cue as Jamie moved his hand and glanced with dread at the screen, expecting that shots had been taken or to see ESU rushing the building. Instead he observed with utter relief as one diminutive but determined redheaded rookie cop was leading a handcuffed perp out the front door and right past any number of officers twice her size without a second glance.

"She's done it!" Henry huffed in admiration as he turned around to look at his obviously relieved and once again overcome-for-words grandson with a huge smile. "Jamie, look! She's done it! Can't believe a rook could pull that off!"

"Damn," Quincy added as his eyes were fixed forward and he was instantly smitten while taking in the brief closeup of Annabel before she was surrounded by the other ecstatic officers from the 3-5 as she was handing off her prisoner. "I mean _damn,_ Reagan! What's with you and these fine-looking lady cops?" he demanded before fishing for an introduction. "Please tell me this one's gonna come visit you soon too! Is there a mister or a boyfriend in the picture?"

"She's… she's okay, thank God," Jamie stuttered as he ignored that bait and collapsed back as all the pent up air in his chest was released in one fell swoop before he finally felt notice from those sore ribs again. "Wait… there's blood on her arm, Pop!" he hissed after an open eyeball detected where everyone's attention was drawn. "Patterson's putting pressure on it and the medics are coming in!"

"She's waving them off, Jamie," Henry assured as he watched just as intently. "If it's anything, it's a scratch… Renzulli's with her now. He's got his hands on his hips after pointing her towards the bus. Look at his body language and hers… she's fine… giving him guff... he'll take care of it. You don't have to worry. You were right… you taught her well and she could handle herself. Francis better dust off a medal for that girl. Should I call Eddie and see what went down in there? To hell with that desk sergeant… he should pick up the phone for me; I'll give him what for."

"No, just turn it off, Pop… all of it," he begged, feeling an intense desire to be alone and back away from all of this before another anxiety attack overtook him. "Tell Ed… tell her I'll talk to her later… I need to… I want… don't feel so good now," he admitted with a pleading look up at Marguerite. "Please, I can't do this with them here…"

"I think visiting hours are over," the nurse advised matter-of-factly as she mirrored Renzulli's posture and the two other men in the room knew they were being dismissed with no other option. "Jamie needs some pain medication and rest. That took too much out of him not even a day after a crisis in surgery. He's not to be disturbed by anyone the rest of the afternoon… and that goes for you too, Quincy Johnson," she admonished as she turned his wheelchair and gave him a small shove towards the door. "Back to your room, young man and stay there."

"Jamie," Henry tried to mollify his grandson again, but the boy had shut down once more and it was apparent from the tears held back in the corner of his eyes that he needed to tune everyone else out as he dealt with all the emotions this incident had generated. "Rest easy, son… we'll talk later," he whispered with a hand laid on his grandson's cheek and a parting kiss to the forehead after he had gathered up his coat and things. "She did good; I'm proud of you both," he finished with a pat before the emotion closed his throat and he slowly walked out of the room with a crestfallen nod at Marguerite of his own before heading home earlier than intended.

Another Reagan had come to the same conclusion as Erin about Jamie's future in the NYPD, and from the looks of it Henry was sure he wasn't the only one to do so that afternoon which left a heartbroken grandfather with his own ideas about what should be done about it.

* * *

 _Tough one for Jamie to take in from the sidelines, but yay for Annabel who managed to keep her cool and talk her way out of an intense situation… all while catching the eye of a certain Quincy Johnson… more on that later perhaps. Next, an impromptu meeting about Jamie's plight at the family home results in a few flared tempers as Henry and Erin both press Frank for different things while Danny's take on it may influence an upcoming crisis in his own household._


	47. Chapter 47

Chapter 47

"Pop? You here?" Frank called out as he came through the front door after work and set his briefcase down in the foyer before removing his overcoat. "I'm having a whiskey, shall I bring you one?" he asked and poured two generous glasses anyway before waiting for an answer with the thought that after the day he'd experienced dealing with the media fallout and reports from the hostage situation perhaps more than one was on order. His frown deepened though when the house remained silent even as he gravitated towards the sunroom where the lone light on downstairs appeared to be emanating from.

"Pop," he repeated with growing concern when the older man still did not answer or acknowledge him and sat facing away from the doorway and staring straight ahead, seemingly lost in thought. "What's wrong?" he added as a cold, irrational fear knifed through him. He knew his father went to see Jamie that day of course and would be upset with the visual confirmation regarding what his grandson now faced, but he hadn't expected this response when he returned home, even though he was well aware Henry had been with his son when they witnessed the broadcast situation with the 3-5 together.

"I was just thinking back to the day," Henry finally answered while he shifted against the cushion holding his own well-nursed tumbler of liquid courage as Frank joined him sitting on the opposite chair. "The day I realized I was a dinosaur, and it was time to put in my papers," he explained. "I had years on the job… had gotten too full of myself for my own good in the big chair… your mother was starting to have some issues. If I had known," he paused. "If I had known I'd only have another six months with her at that point I sure as hell wouldn't have tried to hang on to it like I did… there was nothing left for me to offer the department by then," he added. "It should have been easy to walk away. I was finished."

"Oh, c'mon, Pop… that's not true and you know it," Frank admonished while trying his best to figure out where this uncomfortable conversation was headed. "I still lean on you for advice to this day. What's the point of this?" he demanded.

"The point?" Henry questioned as he finally looked over and met his son's eyes and Frank could see a true sorrow was rooted in his father's expression… more like grief, actually. "I sat with two fine young men today, Francis… a better cop and a better soldier than I ever was, and neither one of them will have the opportunity to do what they were meant to the way things stand… to contribute their best or leave on their own terms, and they both have so much more to give, don't you think? I know how hard it was for me… for the two of them, I can't imagine."

"You know what I think?" Frank huffed a little as he stood up and paced over to the window before drawing the drape back to watch as a familiar car pulled up aside of the house. "I think this whole conversation is a little premature. You're already writing Jamie off because of what's happened to his leg," he accused as he turned around with just a hint of the doubt and anger that festered in his own mind and was building in pressure but had yet to find a suitable outlet. "It hasn't even been a week… he's still got a major surgery ahead. Of course he's scared and depressed right now. He'll come good as soon as he's had a chance to work on it. The boy's never failed at anything he's put his mind to!" he reminded with an obvious effort to try to convince himself of that point.

"That's what you think, Francis?" Henry bristled as the back door opened and Erin hurried in before putting an extra bit of mustard on the closing phase as it banged shut loudly. "Well, you're wrong… it's not Jamie I'm worried will hold himself back," he insisted a bit coldly.

"What's _that_ supposed to mean?" Frank demanded with a frown as he glanced over while his daughter flung her bag down on the kitchen counter and pulled out a set of papers before joining them in the room and sitting down with an indignant blustery puff on the couch.

"Is this for me?" she made a calculated assumption while picking up the extra glass of scotch her father had left on the table and taking a long swallow. "If not, it is now," she followed with obvious venom in her voice.

"And what's gotten into _you?"_ Frank clamored, feeling like he was slowly being cornered in his own home given the contentious stares he was receiving from the other two parties. That was only multiplied by a third factor when the kitchen door opened and closed again as one Daniel Reagan now followed his sister's footsteps into the fray and collapsed aside of her in a boneless heap. "Did I miss a memo?"

"No, but I must have," Erin griped openly as she tipped the glass once more. "Like when I showed up to visit my little brother at the hospital this afternoon and got turned away again. He was sleeping and I couldn't even be in the room with him, or so I was told! Eddie's idea I assume?" she asked with thinly veiled contempt, still simmering on the events of the day before.

"No, sweetheart," Henry assured as he softened his voice towards her. "That was my fault; I was there. Jamie had a tough morning. He got himself all worked up about the hostage situation with the 3-5 that was on the news and then he wasn't feeling well afterwards. Marguerite kicked me out too so he could rest. I'm afraid I wasn't much help to him today after all," he admitted with a downtrodden look as his granddaughter's temper flashed hotter with the knowledge that he had been dismissed as well.

"Well, I don't think it's right they can do that!" Erin challenged. "Tell us when we can and can't see him… okay so I get there are visiting hours, but now even those don't count and it takes forever to get in there! Dad and I had to leave last night without seeing him because of the "rules" even after Jamie got so sick in surgery," she emphasized with air quotes. "But Eddie gets to stay no matter how upset she makes him! I know she's back up there tonight, too!"

"As she should be," Frank defended. "She's his wife now."

"Spousal rights? That's what you're falling back on, Dad?" Erin railed back. "What about thirty-one years of family rights? He's a Reagan! He's my brother and just because he married her doesn't mean I can flip a switch and not be worried about him anymore! What about yesterday when he didn't even want her there in the first place? What are we going to do if God forbid something happens to him and we can't get in touch with her? Huh? It's supposed to go down the line in the family then, but these people over there at Columbia seem to have their own set of rules or they make them up as they go. Are you comfortable taking the chance? Because I'm not!" she spat as she pointed down to the coffee table where she had thrown the set of papers earlier. "That's why I went back to the office and had these drawn up!" she asserted.

"Oh, here she goes… the middle child butting in and getting all legal on our asses," Danny sighed as he finally entered the conversation with a flippant eye towards the papers, his mind occupied and perplexed with his own bit of news, but he wisely chose to keep that tightly vested for now given the rest of the drama in the room. "The kid's gonna love this."

"Erin…" Frank warned as he saw where she was headed. "We're not starting something here."

" _I'm_ not starting anything," she contended. "It's a simple New York State medical power of attorney addendum… it just says that Jamie authorizes us… Dad, then me... to make decisions for him in the event that the primary agent… his _wife,"_ she added with a little barb in her tone while refusing to use Eddie's given name in her contentious state. "Is 'not willing, unavailable, or otherwise unable to serve' like if she's caught at work and no one can get a hold of her… nothing else. I mentioned it to Jamie yesterday before they took him back to surgery, and he seemed fine with it," she fluffed, neglecting to qualify that with the fact her brother had been heavily under the influence of some narcotics at that point and asleep at her side. "He'll talk to her. All we have to do is go there tomorrow together while he's awake and have two witnesses sign in lieu of having it notarized," she asserted. "That way it's all taken care of before Thursday's surgery and we have some peace of mind."

"I'm sure Eddie's gonna see it that way," Danny chipped in. "I know Linda wouldn't. She'd feel like you were pushing her away as an outsider… like it's a postnup or something because you don't trust her to make decisions you agree with."

"Well, she shouldn't!" Erin huffed. "She should see it for what it is… his family being there to take care of him! There's nothing wrong with this… it doesn't affect her position in the least bit and just protects Jamie's interests in case there's an emergency. He can explain it to her... really we should all have them. What's the point of having a fancy law school education if I don't use it to take care of my family?" she demanded. "Look what Dad said happened in Washington… that other doctor was going to operate on Jamie against his wishes and just take out his spleen and cut off his…" she choked up while recounting that possibility. "You're naïve, Danny, if you think that can't happen."

"For what it's worth, I don't think it's a bad idea, Francis," Henry chimed in before the two siblings could continue their fracas. "Someone in the family besides Eddie should have the boy's back for once in case he needs it, especially now."

"You got something you need to get off your chest too, and _for once,_ Pop?" Frank challenged his father as he had no doubt at this point there was much more the older man wanted to say to him given the start of their conversation before Erin had brought up any notion of this paperwork. "What the hell is that supposed to mean, anyway?"

"Yes, I have something to say, but even though you claim to lean on me for advice... in this instance I know it won't get through that stubborn thick Irish noggin of yours when I tell you that Jamie needs to stay in the NYPD no matter what happens or what kind of strings and loopholes you need to pull or make up to keep him there!" the older man thundered a bit.

"POP! What is this about?!" Frank's irritation rose and his head and shoulders bobbed in frustration now as he started to gesture with his hands as well as pace back and forth. "There's disability rules and guidelines that have to be followed. I can't cherry pick which ones apply to my own son! If he can't pass the physical to stay on the street, it's a liability for both him and the public to put him there… not to mention the rest of the officers in the field!"

"I'm not talking about _patrol,_ FRANCIS," Henry barked back at equal volume. "I saw Jamie today when he watched that scene go down with his platoon and that rookie… he already knows that pretty much no matter what he does he's never gonna be fit for street duty again," he admitted and the Reagans all paused for a few seconds to bow their heads and look away from one another in sadness at that revelation knowing what it meant to the youngest among them. "But I also saw what a damn fine job he did of training that rook… just like he did for Eddie and George after her. He brings out the best in these young cops and steers them in the direction they should go. Just think what he could do for the NYPD on that full time. Don't tell me the hostage negotiation squad won't have their eyes on this Annabel after today. She talked her way out of a tight spot because Jamie put the time into teaching her how to do it. You could have had a huge tragedy on your hands this afternoon… another cop funeral and a televised murder-suicide… but you didn't because of that so she better get a medal for it, because she deserves it!" he insisted. "Hell, he does too! I'll go down there and pin one on both of them myself!"

"You're talking about appointing him to the academy as an instructor," Danny was the first to catch on and redirect. "I don't know, Gramps," he dissented while shaking his head. "Harvard does way too much thinking… I mean he's smart enough usually to do it faster than most, but the majority of these recruits don't have that and too much indecision will either get them or some of us killed… rookies already have too much to learn and everything going against them," he asserted his previous stance and brought another painful relevant fact to light. "We don't even know why Anderson got into that situation in the first place. She could have screwed up or hesitated by thinking about it and not reacting, and Jamie already admitted to me I was right about that since he remembers he had time to step out of the way of that car, and didn't…. he just doesn't know why," he revealed to three sets of shocked eyes while continuing to push away the notion that perhaps his brother had been on target with what happened all along… as evident by the initial findings from the tests run on those glass fragments from the accident scene which had just been forwarded to him minutes before he arrived. "We don't need a whole class of cops who second guess themselves like that," he tried to convince.

"I read the preliminary 49s from Renzulli and the shooting team… Officer Anderson was following her TO's orders to the letter when the incident went down… he commended her for stepping in front of Patterson to take the first bullet so let's not sully her actions which were honorable and first-rate all around so will be rewarded as such, but even given that Jamie doesn't meet the requirements to be certified as an instructor anyway," Frank fell back on his guidelines once more.

"Hogwash!" Henry asserted as he slammed his glass down on the table for emphasis. "I knew you would lead with that and those would be the first words out of your mouth! He's got a first in class Harvard law degree, the highest ever score on the sergeant's exam and almost seven years of distinguished service on the job. Last I remember… AND I DO REMEMBER, FRANCIS, because I helped write the Training Bureau Guide… you need three annual performance evaluations, then have to skate past a three-person supervisor interview before the CO recommends you for a position and the Deputy Commissioner of Training contacts the PC for the final okay. Nowhere in that do I read he's not qualified! Only that his father isn't willing to stick his neck out and do the right thing for both the department and his son because he's afraid of a few whispers. Well let them yell it from the roof of 1PP!" he insisted. "Do the right thing by him _for once!"_

"Pop, there's what's written, and what's done. He doesn't have the time on the job in a supervisory position… he's only been a sergeant for the past year and a half. Pushing him through there after what's happened will look like what it is… blatant nepotism."

"Even if he's got a gift for it and it's for the betterment of the department? Really? So basically no matter what you're going to fall on that sword and take his future with you," Henry argued. "Any other one of the 34,999 you'd be pulling out all the stops to keep, but your own son…"

"Oh, it gets better than that," Erin chimed in with an angry tone of her own. "I ran into DCLM Miller at the courthouse this morning giving a tour to his second choice applicant for that opening in legal… there went another job that Jamie was perfectly qualified for and one that the head of the department was actively trying to recruit him to take before any of this even happened! Apparently he can't have that one either because Dad said he wouldn't be ready to start on time… nothing about him being right for the position or not!" she snapped. "So much for family coming first! Jamie needs an attainable goal to help him get through this… that's what the nurse said!" she insisted while borrowing on Marguerite's words. "Eddie can't or won't admit what everyone in this room except maybe Dad already knows… that he's not going back on the street!" she started to cry harder as even Danny reached over to wrap an arm around her quivering shoulder and pull her close. "He'll try to do it for her though, won't he? And when he keeps getting stressed out because he's failing and makes himself sick over this or worse… what then? We just sit back and watch while he hurts himself some more! Well I won't!" she asserted and stood up after plucking those papers off the table.

"Erin, honey… sit down and let's talk some more," Frank urged as he sensed they were at an impasse given the ironically inherited absolute stubborn set of his daughter's jaw as her stare bored back at him.

"I will be at that hospital with these papers at two o'clock tomorrow afternoon," she asserted in a deadly even voice. "Rest assured I _will_ get in to see him at that point and I'm going to make damn sure that my little brother is taken care of no matter what happens. This is just the first step. If you're not there to do the same, Dad…"

"Erin will move herself up the list and I'll sign below her," Henry threatened as he likewise got up and made his stance. "I'll not have my grandson put at risk because you're afraid of how it will look. As long as Jamie agrees and Eddie understands, I don't see the harm… but I do know for a fact that God forbid something does come up, you'll regret not having done this… or the other things you could have for him," he asserted before taking his glass and heading for the kitchen. "I'm going to bed," he added and effectively ended his part of the discussion.

"And I'm going home," Erin followed before grabbing her purse on the counter. "Night Danny, night Grandpa," she added while decidedly leaving her father out of the picture before retreating through the back door, still angry with his perceived stance against Jamie's future interests and Eddie's right to control them.

"You got something to say to me too?" Frank huffed at the lone remaining figure in the room who had stayed uncharacteristically subdued in the middle of the family fray, still slumped against the back of the couch. "Why'd you end up here tonight?"

"I just came to tell you that Linda and I were headed up there together to see the kid tomorrow morning… she agreed to meet with Dr. Kenzie to go over all the stuff she needs to do for him when he comes home and sign those confidentiality papers," Danny replied quietly with a half-truth, suddenly second-guessing the wisdom of bringing anything new up and hoping to duck out now while his father was distracted with the other drama without getting into that little reveal he had made about Jamie's accident and the troubling information that might follow.

No such luck.

"He remembers more about what happened now?" his father asked quietly as he returned to the window to watch the street as Erin pulled her car away. "He give you anything solid to go on?"

"Not exactly," Danny admitted. "He's still messed up about the car itself… and some other stuff I think at least," he added with his own waffle at the situation given those nagging results Mike had sent over. "He just knows he hesitated. Said he had enough time to get out of the way and didn't."

"So why would he do that?" his father snapped suddenly in added frustration, catching his oldest son off guard with the edge in his voice.

"What?"

"You said yourself that Jamie's style… it might not be for everyone, but he makes it work. Have you ever seen your brother fail to react before?"

"No, but…"

"Then why now?" Frank demanded as he turned around once more. "Maybe we've been looking at this the wrong way. We've been waiting to hear him say something else because we've assumed it couldn't be true, but he's sure he saw that car… that part of his recollection has not changed in spite of all the pain medication and delusions otherwise. What if it's not a dream or a flashback to that time in college? He told the same to Baker and Rick right there as he was laying in the street."

"He also said he thought Joe was coming to take him home... he was in shock after just becoming a hood ornament," Danny reminded with an uneasy twist in his stomach as he allowed himself to consider the probability now that someone else had said it out loud first. Still, it was impossible, right? "You really want to run with that, Dad? You think this is what? The car coming back to get him because he sold it for parts? Like that movie _Christine?_ 'Cause that was a red-and-white 1958 Plymouth Fury not a blue '71 Chevelle."

"That car... no, of course not, Dan," Frank admitted with a sad sigh and a shake of the head as he recognized how unlikely that scenario actually was and considered without fondness for the first time that ancient vehicle of his that had been passed down through his youngest sons, having no idea how close he and Danny were to the actual truth at that moment. "Obviously it's gone, but one like it maybe… the only thing I can think of in all of this that makes sense and explains what happened is that Jamie would freeze if he saw something like that. You know what that car meant to him… to Joe."

"And do you know what a coincidence it would be for that to happen?" Danny asked, trying to convince himself more than his father at this point. "For someone in a '71 blue Chevelle in Washington DC to run a red light at the exact time Jamie was crossing the street in front of him? You better call your buddy George in CompStat to figure the odds of that one out because it's gotta be worse than winning the Powerball, and besides…"

"...I don't believe in coincidences," Frank followed with a knowing nod and a defeated muttered confession as he was talked down and took a heavy seat in the now nearly empty room before picking up his drink once more. "You're right, Daniel… I guess I was just reaching. Maybe Erin is right too… about me not accepting what's happened either," he conceded as his voice broke, rough with emotion, and Danny was shocked to see his father's eyes well up and run over as he took his glasses off and laid them on the table before burying his face in those big hands. Frank Reagan was usually the master of keeping up a stiff countenance on his public face, a veneer which had only been cracked at times of extreme family duress, but here he was crying openly in front of his oldest son and no one had died… not yet, anyway. Not even when his wife had been ill or his own father lay in a hospital bed on Thanksgiving had he shown such emotion in front of his children otherwise… just that one time when Mary had gone into premature labor and they had faced losing Jamie the first time. The sight turned the oldest Reagan sibling instantly cold with fear as one of his most relied upon pillars of strength crumbled into shaking sobs in front of him.

"Dad!" Danny gasped and tried to comprehend what was happening as the intended conversation got away from him since Frank had come at it so hard from an unexpected angle while he daresay hesitated and remained frozen in place like a deer in the headlights ironically, unsure what to do for a change.

"Maybe I'm afraid to open up those avenues to him because I think it means he won't overcome this… that he'll never be the same again. I keep expecting your brother to bounce back just like he's always done for everything else in his life," his father admitted painfully after several more long moments of releasing some of his own pent up emotions over Jamie's current plight. "But that's not happening here, is it?" he choked out rhetorically. "Everything's not okay and perfect right now, and it might not ever be again," he parroted Eddie's current manta while making a significant, heartbreaking edit. "Not to leave this room. Excuse me, Dan… I'll talk to you tomorrow," he managed to force out after finishing the last of his drink with a final hard swallow and getting up to leave the empty glass on the counter by the sink before climbing the stairs to the privacy of his bedroom.

Danny's stunned gaze lingered on the now empty stairwell where the big, looming shadow of a man he greatly respected had disappeared. He had been so shocked by Frank's breakdown and exit that he hadn't even breached the reason he had come there to speak to him in the first place… to present a fact that on face value seemed to support the crazy notion of his father's that perhaps his brother's memories weren't so far off the mark. A glance down at his phone reminded him of the truth as he fumbled to reread that text from Mike just to cement it back in his brain.

 _Glass samples from DC consistent with 1968-71 GM Cars T-3 / T3 vintage headlamps with ribbing in the triangle. Fits all vehicles from that make/era with four headlamp system._

So not a smoking gun from a speeding Chevelle, but it didn't exactly rule it out either. Danny was at a loss what to do now that Frank was evidently in such an emotional state along with the rest of the family and was loath to open these wounds up further without more proof if it could be later discounted since there were literally dozens of other models those shards could have come from. Unsure if he was doing the right thing or not, he made the decision to keep this to himself for the time being until it could be corroborated.

 _Thanks for the info,_ he texted back with nervous fingers to his forensics buddy. _Call me when you get that video up,_ he instructed, knowing that Mike was currently hard at work tracking down a copy of the old software from the now-defunct manufacturer and praying that would let them unlock the footage from Mr. Garibaldi's store. If he could verify the fact that a car of that make and model was in the area at that time he'd bring this back up to his father and they could talk to Jamie about it together… if nothing else maybe his brother could find some peace or closure at knowing why it might have happened in the first place, even if they couldn't bring the driver to justice.

 _Will do,_ came the quick reply back, and Danny stood up with one last sad, furtive glance up the stairs where both his patriarchs had retreated to separate rooms of the house before deciding to head home to his wife in Staten Island who at that very moment was anxiously tucking a small pink box underneath some towels in the back of the bathroom closet in preparation for the next morning when another test result might wind up hidden pending verification because of the emotional turmoil involved.

* * *

 _So, lots of drama running through the Reagans' lives right now with more to come as they individually process the events of the past week and look for the right ways to move forward. Will Frank concede to his daughter's request now and how will he handle his son's future in the NYPD? What will Jamie decide after witnessing his platoon move on without him, or about this power of attorney paperwork, and how will Eddie react to what can only be perceived as Erin's interference? First though, Linda and Danny will have to contend with a life-altering event since either result will hold heavy consequences for both their marriage and individual family's future._


	48. Chapter 48

Chapter 48

"Danny, you hardly slept all night, and it's almost five-thirty already," Linda sighed in frustration as she glanced at the clock while her husband's continued tossing and turning well into the early morning hours spoke volumes as to the obvious stress he had encountered during his visit to the family home the night before although he had remained frustratingly tight-lipped about the cause. "Really, you've been this way since coming back from Washington. You need to get some rest… if you do fall asleep you wake up with nightmares. I'm worried about you."

"I know; I'm sorry, babe," he moaned as he lay on his back with his arms crossed tightly over his eyes and considered exactly what had been gnawing at his insides since Jamie's accident… was it the gruesome injury itself, the investigation with its mounting odd "coincidences" or the time spent at that military hospital and around Kenzie and her minions here at Columbia with the memories of friends in similar situations and bad endings that had been dredged up… he settled on all the above although tonight no doubt it had been tipped towards his own father's reaction to the stress which still seemed surreal. All of that had left him with precious little in reserve to deal with the disappointment Linda had suffered, but to his credit he had made a concerted effort to keep that on the front burner and tend to her needs at home first over anything else the past few days… or so he thought with only that one abbreviated trip north to visit his brother since their return. "I'm keeping you awake… I'll head downstairs on the couch so you can catch another hour before the boys get up and we have to leave for the hospital," he offered as he reached over with one hand and searched for her arm to give it a squeeze.

"No, don't," she implored as she moved closer and curled up to his side with a hand over his chest, wanting to stay near him. "I'd rather you just talked to me about it so we can both eventually get some sleep," she encouraged considering she was in much the same state with the specter of that little pink box in the closet not fifteen feet away looming larger every passing second as she waited for the first morning light to do the deed. The last five days had dragged on as the slowest in her memory made worse with the amount of downtime she'd experienced trying to recover without any chemical assistance from the intense muscle spasms in her back brought on by that nerve conduction test. Even now there was a nagging, unrelenting soreness that remained although she had progressively downplayed its existence the closer it came to this moment of truth… just really minutes away whenever she found the courage to get up and go into the bathroom. What was more worrisome now though was the current state of Danny's mind and how he would react to potentially being blindsided by the news if it was positive so she continued to put it off and remain in the bubble of uncertainty. "Now what happened? Was it about your brother? Is it because you're working the case?"

"Sort of, I mean what else? But not how you think," he finally opened the door a crack and allowed some of his misgivings out. "No one in the family knows how to deal with this, Lin," he lamented in an admission that surprised her. "Eddie's doing her best even though she's a mess half the time and her mother is trying to help, but she has her hands full with Kaylin because she doesn't understand why her daddy can't be around. My sister is freaking out, and she's got tunnel vision so all she's focused on is Jamie and the best way to smother him… now she's writing up legal crap because she's not in control."

"Legal crap?"

"Yeah, something that lets her or Dad have a say in an emergency."

"Like a medical power of attorney?" Linda questioned as she fell back on her nursing knowledge and sank into her pillow while considering just how much influence the close-knit Reagan family asserted in their individual lives… even through marriage for the so-called outsiders once they became a part of it. "I thought that's standard for the department though, and shouldn't that be for his wife to worry about? Didn't we fill one of those out before? Why would she want to take that away from Eddie? No one on my side would ever dare do something like that, and I'd be really ticked off if she interfered with us if something happened to you!"

"I know, I told them that. She just wants to be backup if Eddie's not around and Jamie said it was okay I guess. Who knows if he even knew what the hell she was talking about at that point… be just like her to say something when he was doped up and then tell us to take it for gospel. We did sign stuff like that and a living will years ago when the boys came… it's recommended. But I don't really know, Lin… once she started waving those forms around I kinda tuned her out. You know how she is with mothering and wanting to make decisions for him… well, the other night when she and Dad had to leave before seeing him after his surgery while Eddie went back there got to her. She's been on the warpath ever since he came back to New York and last night she really went after Dad for not saving that job in legal for him, before that Gramps jumped in and wanted him appointed to the academy staff and Dad said no and I agreed with him so they fought over that. It wasn't pretty," he admitted with a heavy sigh while still leaving out the most disturbing part about his father's break. The words "Not to leave this room," echoed in his mind and he felt compelled to honor them.

"Seems like everyone wants to tell Eddie and Jamie what to do, but no one is even giving them a chance to cope with what's happened first or figure out what they want or need right now," Linda observed and equated it to her own situation which would no doubt garner strong opinions on either side if the truth was released. "That's not fair! It's their call how they deal with this no matter if you think it's a good idea or not!"

"He's my brother… I have a right to an opinion, don't I?"

Brother… wife, tomato, tomahto.

"You don't have a right to make decisions for him though, do you?" she continued in an insistent tone. "Whether he's at the academy or not, really, Danny? Would you like it if he made that call for you? And it's not just him… he's a grown man with a family now, but it's just like before when everyone pushed law school on him and the only one that listened to what Jamie really wanted was Joe. Has anyone even talked to him about this yet? Even if he gets bad news from the doctor what happens should be his choice! Do you think what Erin or Henry are doing is right?"

"No… I don't know anymore. I'm sorry, Lin, you're right… it's their business. Please don't get wound up about it," he added once more as he sensed she was getting upset and this was now somehow personally related to her own situation and her intense desire to keep it private between themselves as a couple. "I shouldn't have said anything."

"Oh, Danny… I want you to talk to me about stuff like this and not hold it in, but it's just been a really stressful week for everyone," she trailed off in guilt with the thought of adding to that and a nervous glance at the bathroom door.

"I know, and for you too," he acknowledged with his mind a million miles away from what was truly behind her unease and scheduled now to take place in just moments. "You've really been through it after what happened at the doctor's on Friday, especially after what I did, being late…" he paused as she tensed at those words before continuing. "I can see that… No one else has been there for you, and that's why I didn't want to bring all this home and make it seem like Jamie's situation is more important than what's happening to you… _to us,"_ he corrected again although she sensed he had already dealt with Dr. Jacob's recommendation against getting pregnant and pigeonholed it with some relief in the past tense. "I know how hard it's been on you, but I guess it's just like everything else though… it always comes with me, and maybe right now I just don't have room for it all."

 _Well, maybe you'll have to make some more space,_ Linda thought reluctantly as she processed his current state which did not appear receptive to such an added complication before continuing out loud. "About that, besides Frank, does anyone else know about why I was really at the doctor last week? I mean I don't want your sister in our business right now either."

"No, hon. You asked me not to say anything… I promised. Dad guessed, but he won't talk to anyone about it unless… well, I'm not sure… I think maybe my brother might have suspected something too before all this happened and went to him, but no one said anything to me about it and Eddie never brought it up the whole trip down to DC," he added as she sighed inwardly with relief at that news, having no desire to discuss any of that with her sister-in-law either when they finally crossed paths again. "I doubt that it's at the top of any of their worry lists right now. You'll see today… Jamie's lucky if he remembers what he had for breakfast. Speaking of which," he interjected. "I'm not gonna be able to sleep now. I'll go downstairs to start the coffee and see if we have enough stuff for some French toast… Grandma Betty's recipe. That was always your favorite. How 'bout it? You haven't been eating much in the morning the past few days. I know I'm not a great cook, but I won't screw that up. Take your time getting ready… maybe a hot shower will help loosen up your back for the drive."

"Sounds good," Linda smiled tightly at his continued attentiveness and snuggled in for a stronger hug to savor it while it was still there. Despite his efforts, she had no doubt that some of his infamous Reagan temper would be on display in short order if there was a reason to rock their family boat since his concern was settled on her health and welfare over the desired addition of another child. Perhaps it would be better to wait until after the boys left for school for the unveiling if necessary. "Thank you for understanding about all this," she prefaced before offering a kiss and praying they could handle whatever happened next together. "I needed to try. It's something I had to do."

"I know that," he agreed, reflecting on a similar conversation they had just had a few days previously regarding his need to investigate Jamie's accident. "And I'm sorry after all this it didn't turn out the way you hoped, but we're good together, Lin… and we're gonna get through it no matter what, right?"

"Right, Danny… I know we will," she assured as she accepted his kiss and watched while he left the room to go downstairs before getting up herself and drawing on her robe as she made her way into the bathroom and turned on the shower like he suggested to mask her intentions.

Ten minutes later it was an unsuspecting Daniel Reagan who stood at the kitchen sink staring out the window at the breaking sunrise with a cup of coffee in his hand trying to come to terms with all that had happened that week while upstairs his wife's shaking hand held a small pink plastic stick as a faint second line appeared before her disbelieving eyes and a sudden decision was made to keep that reality private from everyone else, even her husband for now before she had further confirmation and time to process it herself. A phone call to Dr. Geisner's office later in the day for an appointment would provide what she needed in the coming week.

###

"Hey, are you in here all by yourself?" Erin asked with a nervous glance as she scanned Jamie's room and was relieved to find him alone in the ward when she appeared just before one-thirty that afternoon… intentionally allowing herself added time before her father's expected arrival at two o'clock.

"Yeah," came the single word as confirmation before her knowing look demanded an explanation. "Linda and Danny were here until eleven. Marguerite just took a break for a few minutes to go get something to eat while Quincy is down having a scan," he clarified. "She worries more about him roaming around now that he's allowed to use his chair. If things are looking good, he gets to be transferred to another wing tomorrow and start real rehab; s'not like I'm going anywhere," he added with a sad sigh and more than a hint of loneliness at the thought of being left behind even by this near stranger in a similar circumstance as he had become accustomed to his positive and entertaining presence next door.

"Not yet, but you will soon, right? Just another week after the surgery tomorrow. How did things go with Linda?" she asked, trying to accentuate the positive even though in her mind there was no way in hell he'd be ready to go anywhere in a month, much less a week given the defeat evident on his face and in the tone of his voice. "Did she get approved for the home care?"

"I guess. She didn't say too much while she was here, just got emotional and cried a bunch after talking to Kenzie so Danny took her home. Guess I have that effect on people now," he shrugged. "He didn't talk a lot either… just said he hasn't come up with much on the accident and he's got cases waiting for him at the squad this afternoon," he added with the sad resolve that he couldn't say the same and go back to the 3-5 and pick up on his life where it had been left off. From all appearances yesterday though it looked as if they were doing fine without him down there, anyway. No one other than Danny had even bothered to follow up and let him know how Annabel was or if her actions had been justified or not and Eddie hadn't been privy to any of that from her place behind the desk at the 12th. He guessed though he'd get the rest of the scoop straight from the Commissioner's mouth since he was due to drop by this afternoon.

"Jamie…" Erin trailed off, hating to see him so depressed, but needing to use that to her advantage at least for the next several minutes until she secured a desired agreement to sign those forms before her father showed up. Her little brother needed to be firmly on board with the plan beforehand. "About that… did Danny mention the fact that we all ran into each other at the house last night?… Well, all of us except Eddie since she was here with you," she pried as the one wrinkle in her scheme was the fact that her older brother was slated to be here first today and if he let slip that there had been a big brouhaha over this she'd never get it past point A.

"No, he didn't bring it up, why?" Jamie asked, not knowing that the oldest Reagan sibling was not only still rattled by their father's reaction, but now more puzzled and focused on his wife's sudden change to a weepy demeanor that morning than anything else.

"Well, we were talking about those papers I mentioned the other day… remember? The addendum to our POAs that we're all having done because of what happened to you in Washington… you know in case they can't get a hold of the first person on the list. I was talking to her the other day," Erin offered as she wove the truth around some blatant fiction for good measure. "And Eddie's worried about working under that desk sergeant at the 12th full time… she says he's not always nice and Pop told me he made her get off the phone with you yesterday during that hostage thing. I think everyone would feel better now that she's back at work if we just had it spelled out that the hospital here has to contact Dad and then me in case they can't get through to her in an emergency. Then they won't waste their time and she won't have to worry about that guy being a jerk and not putting the call through since she probably has to keep her cell phone stored in front of him too."

"I don't remember talking about this before and Ed never brought any of it up," Jamie queried with the concern Erin knew that would be drawn out anyway. "She's really worried about it?"

"Of course, I mean after what happened… what they almost did to you… who wouldn't be?" his sister fluffed as she tried to keep his focus on his wife knowing that Jamie would do anything to keep Eddie happy and reassured. "It was really hard on her, this whole thing has been and she's been really stressed, but I'm sure she just didn't want you thinking about it too much this week with everything else you have on your mind. Dad's coming by this afternoon though, and I brought the papers with me… just your standard stuff that lists her as the primary and adds us as successors. We can sign it in front of two witnesses and be all done with it so at least that's out of the way," she assured and tried to slide it through without drawing notice. "Okay?"

"Yeah, sure if it helps make her feel better, thanks, Erin," he conceded without too much concern and absolutely no inkling as to the strife that was developing between his sister and wife… one that would be fueled further once Eddie inadvertently found out about Erin's bit of "under the radar" legal wrangling and her quest to ensure that he finally took the lawyer path she felt he was always destined for.

###

"Didn't expect to see your face in here today… thought you were going uptown to see your brother," Maria Baez observed with surprise as her partner turned the corner and pulled up to his desk opposite hers in the 5-4 squad room with a couple of extra large coffees in his hands after lunch. "Damn, Reagan, when's the last time you slept?" she demanded as she noticed the dark heavy circles apparent under his eyes.

"Got some on the couch over the weekend," he growled in a now-irritable mood as he stowed his gun in the desk drawer.

"Newsflash, it's Wednesday," she frowned. "And the couch? What'd you do? Carver sees you in here lookin' like that and she'll take your gun and badge away. Does she even know what's going on with Jamie or Linda's test?"

"No, still keeping that quiet for the kid's sake and Linda and I were up at Columbia this morning," he explained with a shrug. "I thought she was getting better, but her back got sore sitting in the car on the drive up and then seeing him like that… it wasn't good. I thought she's be okay, I mean she's a nurse for crying out loud, but she got really upset… maybe more about what was happening to her because the doc said there obviously had to be some limitations on what she could do for Jamie until she got better. Then we left and she said she wanted to rest and have some time alone this afternoon, so I came here. Carver doesn't have to worry… I'm just gonna sit where I am and pencil push," he promised as he put his head down and slid the extra coffee over to his partner. "It's time to go back to work and start putting some things together again before they get out of hand."

* * *

 _Yup, she is, there's another bean in the picture and poor Danny's being set up now on more fronts than he can imagine as his wife and Mason Malevsky both arrange for a few things behind his back. If he thinks the next week is going to get any easier… well, let's say it's doubtful since he's going to get hit figuratively and literally with a few more shockers of his own coming up soon. Speaking of those, next, we check back in with the lovebirds as Eddie catches on to what's been going on "under the radar" in the Reagan family just before Kenzie delivers some possible bad news as that big surgery is set to take place._


	49. Chapter 49

Chapter 49

"Mrs. Reagan, just a minute, he's not in there… not to worry though," Marguerite called out from Quincy's room before hurrying to try to catch Eddie as she arrived at Jamie's door in the ward first thing Thursday morning.

"Wait, he's not already gone to surgery, has he?" Eddie grew tense as she glanced through the doorway at the empty and already re-made bed with concern. "They weren't supposed to take him until eleven… I told him yesterday that I would be here beforehand!"

"No, no… he should be back any moment. Dr. Kenzie requested an arterial Doppler exam to be done on his right leg this morning in the lab prior to the operation. She's just checking on his circulation now that some of the original swelling is down… of course after today's procedure it will come back once more."

"Does it hurt? He was supposed to be relaxed before he went under again. Billie, I mean Dr. Swanson, said that it was important for him to not be stressed this time," Eddie admitted with renewed guilt over the situation that had occurred between her and Erin on Monday. "What is she looking for? Is something wrong?"

"Not that I am aware of. I'm sure Dr. Kenzie will speak to you when she has the results, but essentially she's looking for any potential areas with vascular deficits that might need to be addressed while she's in there, and don't worry… Billie has made it his personal mission to make sure that Jamie has a smooth experience through the anesthesia today and has been in already to make sure he's feeling very mellow and is tucked up under a warm blanket right now," the nurse smiled in reassurance. "The Doppler exam is not painful; there are no needles, catheters or dyes used. There are no x-rays, and the test has no side effects, it only uses ultrasound to listen to the blood flow. It's the same process used by your doctor when you listen to your baby's heartbeat, and that doesn't hurt now does it?"

"Our baby," Eddie sighed as she slid her hand down on her belly in defeat. "Oh, Marguerite… last time it did hurt… not physically I mean, but it kind of started all this. After we heard that wonderful sound they said one of the munchkin's kidneys might have a problem… hydronephrosis," she explained. "Our doctor wants to check again to see how serious it is or if there are any other issues. Next week we have another appointment with the OB on Wednesday and Jamie won't be able to go, will he? I need him there so much… talking through it over the phone isn't enough, he has to be able to see what's going on or it will drive him crazy. We just found out the day before this all happened… I was upset about it and we were talking on the phone when he was hit by the car and it was my fault he was there and so distracted in the first place," she admitted before trailing off. "He wanted to stay home with me and I pushed him to go. I lied to him and told him I was fine, but I'm not… I can't do this by myself."

"Well, I am certain that he will not be able to accompany you in person so soon," the nurse frowned with genuine sympathy for this young woman who was facing such issues all at once. Although she had first come into this situation frazzled and panicked, Marguerite could see that Eddie was growing into her new role and responsibilities each day that passed and sought to encourage Jamie's wife even as the reality deflated her once more and she walked over to sit quietly on the edge of the empty bed with her head down. "Let me speak to Dr. Kenzie about it, perhaps there is a way we can arrange for a video conference with the other doctor's office. There are no such devices allowed on this wing but the stepdown unit has some more flexible capabilities. If Jamie handles the surgery well this afternoon, he should be more mobile by that point, but I don't want to give you false hope, dear… much of that will depend on the outcome today and what Dr. Kenzie is able to authorize."

"Thank you," Eddie responded with a small frowny face but sincerity in her eyes as she ran her hand through her hair and looked back up in a set effort as she sucked things back together emotionally again before her husband came back. "No, really Marguerite… even if we can't do that… you don't know how much it means to have someone trying to help and to know that you're here looking out for Jamie when I'm away or at work during the day… Janet too, although I've only met her in passing. Jamie's told me she's the same so I can sleep at night and not worry so much. I don't know how we would have gotten through this week without you both."

"Well, that's our job, dear… but you will get through this next part, all of it. Stay positive even when things seem impossible. Even under the best circumstances Jamie is going to experience some things that will make the past few days look easy… you both will. He will need to learn how to walk and care for himself again which is hard for a proud person to accept. There is a saying these young men hear often when they are in training, especially when things are particularly difficult. _You will fail,"_ she quoted from memory. " _You will likely fail often. It will be painful. It will be discouraging. At times it will test you to your very core."_

"Jamie doesn't do failure well," Eddie admitted sadly as she recalled her sister-in-law's words from their argument the other day with regret. "Especially if he thinks he's letting someone else down… like me or his new training partner Annabel the other day," she added in a small voice. "Having that whole hostage situation play out on the TV really scared and frustrated him… he'll barely talk about it, even with me. He still thinks she made a rookie mistake by taking the lead when they went through the doorway, but she managed to save herself, her TO and that woman is still alive because of the things he taught her. Thank God it was just a scratch and not worse. He feels responsible though… that it was his fault since he should have been there to help her."

"That is a sentiment he shares with most of the other young soldiers here," Marguerite advised. "It is in their nature to put others first and serve, but it is also what gives them the strength to overcome what seems insurmountable. Use that… he must believe in himself and keep his sights high, dear… even when others doubt and tell him to be happy with achieving something less. The goal must be attainable, but the human spirit is capable of remarkable things when it is pressed," she added. "He must have faith in himself."

"He usually does, but now he has doubts after what happened, and Jamie's sister..." Eddie interjected as she felt the need to get something off her chest with someone outside the family. "She wants me to come out and tell him he won't be a cop again so he doesn't feel like he's a failure if he… if he can't get that far," she admitted as that repressed fear started boiling up again when she considered that possibility. "I'm not naïve," she insisted with her blue eyes flashing. "I know I've been acting too emotional and sometimes irrational over everything… maybe some of it's the hormones, but most of it's because it hurts my heart to see him this way. I'm really trying to do better though to show him we can handle this together and I can see how bad off his leg is..." she trailed off as her anger at Erin resurfaced once more. "I just can't do that to him… it's who he is, Marguerite! It's part of why I fell in love with him… if you could only watch when he's out there on patrol in the street helping people… she's never understood that it's what he was meant to do. I was his partner in that car for over two years before we got together… we've been through a lot of tight spots like what happened with Annabel, and I won't be the one to say I don't believe to take that away from him! That's why Erin and I argued in here the other day… she thinks she's a better judge because she's known him all his life and that I have my head buried in wishes that won't come true."

"I can see she has concerns for him… like a mother for a child she doesn't want to see hurting," the nurse agreed. "It will be a difficult balance, but you must be strong and have faith in yourself too. Now, speaking of someone like that, if you'll excuse me I need to get back to Quincy before he tries to outmaneuver me and change his bandages on his own," she sighed while getting up as her pager buzzed. "But I'll be here afterwards if you need anything else. Jamie should be back at any moment, that was Dr. Kenzie letting me know they are finished with the test and he's on his way up. Oh, and please tell him I left the copy of that paperwork from yesterday… it's scanned and entered into his record, you can keep the original," she offered while pointing at an envelope sitting on Jamie's table before turning to leave.

"Thanks, again," Eddie offered as she quickly started to gather herself back together before he arrived while the older woman left the room to tend to her other charge. "Deep breath, confident and calm in front of him this time… have faith," she recited while getting up to pace off a little tension before he returned as she grabbed the paper Marguerite had indicated assuming it was the list of things she had asked for that they needed to have at home before his return and the intention of putting it with her purse on the window seat to remember to take and add it to the growing folder of such items that needed to be addressed on Jamie's desk in the den. She was surprised when a glance showed it instead to be a multi-page document regarding a "Medical Power of Attorney for New York, Addendum" in bold letters at the top. "Wait, what the hell is this?" she murmured while scanning down the paragraphs, skipping over the legalease for the most part before locking on the lines listing Francis Xavier Reagan as a first successor agent in the event the person appointed as primary agent is "not willing, unavailable, or otherwise unable to serve" as it read, followed by another such section listing Erin Marie Reagan as a second successor in similar fashion... complete with a series of signatures including those she instantly recognized from Jamie, Frank and Erin with Marguerite and Dr. Kenzie as witnesses. "You have got to be kidding me… seriously?! You really all thought this was necessary?" she hissed under her breath before quickly shoving the paper back in the envelope and putting it down on the table when she heard the elevator ding indicating her husband's imminent return.

"Hey, hon... m'back," Jamie's dulled eyes lit up a bit as they fell on her while William and Rebecca wheeled him in on the gurney followed closely by Billie Swanson the anesthesiologist who was jotting notes and checking his watch. "Didj'a miss me?"

"You sure you're good, man?" the male nurse asked as he situated the transport and locked the wheels before the three of them made short, practiced work of sliding Jamie over and getting him situated on the bed once more. "I've got orders to keep you happy this morning."

"N'stop poking me with all that stuff," Jamie chided somewhat drunkenly as he slowly eased back. "M'm fine, thanks. Just wanna get this thing off n'nev'r see it 'gain," he added with an eye rolled toward his now familiar metal companion as his leg was being propped up and secured under a cover. "You've got people to go an 'laces to see… go… see th'm," he dismissed them with a tired wave of his hand.

"Got ya," William smiled at Eddie as he finished and followed Rebecca out with a chuckle.

"He's all yours for the next hour or so, ma'am," Swanson advised with a smirk of his own while he finished making notes at the computer station before turning and rechecking all of the IV drips. "Everything is on track and he seems to be happy as a heifer on a fresh hay bale this time around… hopefully he'll stay awake for you, but no promises. Dr. Kenzie said she'd be up for a talk before pre-op around eleven. Do you have any questions for me? I'm going to go grab something to eat down the hall while we wait. Be a long afternoon with my stomach growling in there otherwise."

"No, I think we're fine, thanks," Eddie replied with a nervous look at that envelope on the tray as she tried to talk herself out of bringing it up to her obviously inebriated husband, but the fact that he had signed something like that without talking to her about it had her fearing that perhaps he shared his family's doubts on her ability to make decisions for him, and in her haste she had neglected to notice that her name had already been listed at the top as his spouse and the principal agent. "How are you feeling this morning, lambchop?" she asked while leaning over for a kiss on the lips and adding another on his cheek. "That one's for Kaylin; she told me to tell you she loves you and she's being a good girl for Nagyanya and Pop Pop today," she explained before adding another. "And here's one more from the munchie."

"Oh, s'nice," he smiled and reached over and grabbed her hand even as he lost the battle to keep his eyes open momentarily. "Thanks… m'miss th'm."

"Soon, baby, just another week or so now and you'll see both of them again," Eddie cooed softly while considering maybe it could be earlier for Kaylin if a video call could be arranged before that and made a mental note to discuss it with Kenzie before losing the battle of curiosity over bringing up that damn form. "Marguerite left a paper here for you. She said you gave it to her yesterday, but they scanned it so we can keep the original."

"'Kay, s'good. Just take it home," he advised agreeably with no obvious intent to hide it from her or concern that it had been seen while her eyes narrowed as she decided to do some recon and find out exactly what this was about before he clammed up purposefully or not. "Jamie… why did you sign that? You gave your family the right to make decisions for you?… Don't you trust me to do what you want?" she asked and even though it was her intention to stay calm she couldn't help but choke out the last part which drew him out of his happy stupor with a confused look. "I'm your wife!"

"What?" he puzzled at her tone as his eyes opened to three-quarter mast and he tried to sit up straighter although she could see he was now struggling with that. "No s'not that, Ed. It's some ad… damn… dum medical POA thing. Erin just made that up case you were 'way and somethin' 'appened to me… so Dad could say if he had to… so you d'nt have to worry 'bout it. Not 'stead of you," he offered by way of a rambling explanation. "You're first… sometimes she just forgets m'grown up now."

"Sometimes," Eddie muttered as she thought back to that first real encounter between the two in the ER after Kaylin's rescue when her now sister-in-law laid into her about kissing him and letting him jump off a bridge after backing away and not daring to come see him when he was sick with the pneumonia. It had taken Jamie standing fast and withholding contact between him and the family over her and Kaylin to break that deadlock… apparently that was the same issue again with Erin afraid of not being in control of her little brother anymore. "Damned if I do, damned if I don't… but I'm not going anywhere this time either," she seethed under her breath.

"What?"

"Did you ask her to do that?" was the next point of contention although offered in a more measured tone as she pulled the paper back out and reread the skipped top section just to confirm what he said and get a hold of herself since the last thing Eddie wanted was to stress her husband before his surgery once more.

"No, mean I don't 'member… 'sides she's just tryin' to look out for us," he stated, not catching on to Eddie's real concern or the anger now glimmering behind her blue eyes for a sister-in-law who had tried an end run around her and succeeded by framing it in such a way that Jamie thought he was protecting his wife in the event of an emergency. "S'okay, right? I d'nt think… you're not s'upset? You're here t'day and it's s'last time… be all better soon. Ha, ask Quince to sing for you… _Thought I lost my mind… In the morn'n I'll be better,"_ he crooned out a few lines loudly and horribly off key so that his new buddy could hear. "He likes that one," he added, referring to his ward mate's favorite musical selection from OneRepublic's latest album. "Right, Cupcake?" he added before admitting an obvious fact with a resigned sigh. "He's s'much better than me."

"No, it's fine… and I'm not upset," she tried to cover in an effort to fluff this over and keep to her own promise of not bringing it up in front of him. "Jamie, please quiet down… and why did you call him a cupcake? That's really kinda rude. I just didn't know what it was about at first," Eddie explained with an unseen frown as she turned around while chewing the inside of her lip before shoving the document back under her purse with a promise to pursue this further with the other signees in private while she ignored the obvious laughter at his state coming from the room just down the hall and a nurse trying to hush it. "You know I can't make sense of all that legal garbly gook."

"S'kay, neither can I right now," he snickered before carefully focusing to relay the other point which had been explained to him in another one of those now regularly scheduled covert visits with Quincy and the newly introduced Commander Rigsby the night before. "He's Cupcake 'cause he's a badass SEAL, but he was 'fraid to get beat up for bak'in them with his Grandma in the kitchen when he was little and Rigs says you gotta be nicknamed after what you're 'afraid of so everyone knows and you can't hide it, so I'm m'iceman 'cause m'm scared of be'in cold and they gotta keep putting these damn blankets on me. No, wait… not _Mice_ man, that just sounds... weird… mean _Ice_ man. Isn't that cool? Ha, I get it now!"

"Oh, Jamison Reagan, I do love you and I hate when you're hurt," Eddie sighed with a little unrepressed giggle now that she couldn't hold back even given the circumstances since she could not make heads or tails of what he was talking about. "But I have to admit it... it's hard not to laugh when you're like this."

"I know, right? S'good to do that. I think I love Billie though, too," he added seriously as he took off on a different tangent. "You should ask 'im for this stuff when it's time to have the baby… you wouldn't even care if it was a giant jackfruit," he advised seriously. "They can be 'most as big as you. Why is that?"

"Well, I don't really know," Eddie relaxed a little with the vision of her giant baby fruit with a return to the familiar size interplay and considered the fact that he had no apparent guilt over his role in his sister's little legal loophole. "Did Dr. Kenzie say anything while she was doing the test downstairs," she questioned since his little Texas-bred drug cocktail seemed to be as effective as truth serum at the moment.

"Not that I 'member."

"I somewhat doubt that Jamie is going to recall a lot of what happened to him this morning considering how much he's enjoying Billie's little craft brew at the moment," Kenzie commented with raised eyebrows from the doorway before she walked in and closed it behind her as Eddie's heart skipped… there was something in the doctor's manner that turned the brief moment of lightheartedness she had just shared with her husband instantly cold.

"Is there something…" she started, catching herself before saying that panicked word 'wrong' again in front of him. "Dr. Swanson said you wanted to talk to us before surgery? Is it about the test you just did?"

"Yes," Kenzie confirmed as she walked over and pulled up a chair to sit on the opposite side of the bed. "So what Marguerite explained I'm sure was that we did a very simple noninvasive test down there to determine what the blood flow to different parts of Jamie's leg looks like since he did have quite a bit of damage to the vessels in the area of the femoral break at the time of the accident which required some grafting. Now that the swelling was down temporarily I wanted to see where things stood. The good news is everything looks hunky dory blood-wise at least going down to the lower leg… no signs of any problems and just for kicks I shot an x-ray to see how things stand with the fracture sites there… very pleased to see they are stable and already showing some signs of mending… we're still looking at four to six months for full bone strength though."

"But there's bad news too, isn't there?" Eddie questioned as she gripped Jamie's hand. "You said below looks good…"

"It does, and that's why we're seeing such quick healing results there already. Fractures of the long bones need proper vascularization for repair. Blood vessels lost to trauma are usually regenerated and become highly active in order to deliver the necessary oxygen, nutrients and growth factors to the injury site. Blood is supplied to the cortical bone through the nutrient arteries in the marrow cavity and returned by the periosteal veins. In Jamie's femur, some of that's been disrupted because of the severity of the break, particularly to the distal… the lower part... of the bone above the knee and below the fracture. Normally the body compensates by rapidly switching mechanisms until it has time to regenerate some of those pathways, but the test today showed continued poor perfusion in that area, and that's gonna be a big concern going forward," she revealed as she sat back and paused to let it sink in. "Sufficient bone blood flow must be maintained for the successful repair of large skeletal defects using bone grafts. Healing time could be affected as well as the integrity of the bone and its ability to withstand fatigue damage at the fracture site and around the points where the locking screws have to be set for the rod I was planning to insert into the middle of the bone to stabilize it."

"Planning to… so what does th't mean," Jamie managed to pick up on that point through the disappointment in Kenzie's voice even he could register. "Can't fix it?"

"No, it means today I'm also gonna do a little extra vascular work to try to improve that going forward, and we are going to have to be exceptionally careful with you to prevent any stress on those screws afterwards. However, if there are complications associated with the fracture repair process, it's a matter of time before the locking bolts will fail no matter what we do. If that occurs before your femur is stable… we could still have a bad outcome here," she revealed honestly. "I just need to prepare you for that over the hurdles we still face with things like the possibility of infection and the nerve damage we talked about before. By the way, Dr. Martin is an excellent neurosurgeon I've worked with many times before, and he will be joining me today to assess and repair those areas if necessary… he's on his way down from Boston right now and he'll do his thing after the rod is in and the fixator is off."

"So all this could still be for… you might still have to…" Eddie trailed off as the guilt she felt for putting him through this came rushing back and she picked his hand up and kissed the back of it. Maybe Erin and Frank had it right after all… maybe she was incapable of being trusted with the weight of decisions like this because at the moment all she could see was the pain her husband was being forced to endure and the fact that she had asked him to bear it in the first place. Had that other doctor in Washington done what he had prepared to do… well their path forward would be a whole lot clearer at this point… the thought that all of this could be for nothing ripped her heart open anew. "God, Jamie, I'm sorry."

"Eventually, if this fails… yes, it might still be necessary," Kenzie admitted truthfully. "We're not out of the woods here today yet either by a long shot. If I get in there and find that things are irreparably compromised beyond what the test showed… if the bone that needs to be solid there is already weakened from the fixator pins, then I'm afraid the decision will have already been made for us."

"Odds?" Jamie managed to ask despondently and that one word spoke volumes about what was being considered. Maybe it was time to throw up the white flag anyway… at this point the immobility and isolation from his family seemed worse than any other thing he had been asked to endure, especially now since he felt he had no more chance than a Junebug in a chicken coop, or whatever other mind-numbing southern insight Billie would offer in that thick drawl of his at this time if he had been in the room. "What are they?" he demanded, suddenly more alert than before as the adrenaline from renewed fear was flowing.

"Fifty-one, forty-nine," the doctor answered deliberately straight up not to give him the reason he was so obviously looking for.

"SCREW YOU!" he barked back in such sudden, overt anger at the decision she had stolen from him that Eddie jumped up from her seat ready to hold him back as if he could have managed to go anywhere. "That's not fair!" he added in defeat as he sank back into the caresses and assurances his wife was whispering in his ear in an effort to calm him down. "It's s'not fair!"

"I know," Kenzie replied softly, outwardly unfazed by the expected outburst. Rick had taught her well over the years with his knack of backing a kid that was ready to quit into a corner to the point where the only way out was a step forward. "But I stand by it."

"I can't, Ed…" Jamie was muttering. "I can't do it… not if… not for nothin'."

"Yes, you can… it's not for nothing," she tried to assure before also turning her emotions on the other person in the room as she gave her pent-up frustrations a voice. "I thought you said he shouldn't be upset before the surgery! WHY?! How could you come in here and do this if you were going to say that and not give him a choice, anyway? If he quits now, he'll go through the rest of his life feeling like he gave up when the odds were in his favor! Why should we trust you? Maybe you just want to put him through it so you have another subject for your precious study!"

"I'm sorry, I didn't want to do this, but after I saw the blood flow results I had to be sure of that myself before I walked in that operating room today," Kenzie answered. "My whole career I have always put the kid on the table in front of me first to the detriment of everything else. If this was a case of me trying to further this study over what was best for Jamie I wouldn't have said a word, but I saw that look he gave me just now… he's not ready to give up, he can't… not even if there's nothing better than a one percent chance he can beat this. He'll fight, and that's what I needed to know. Now when I go in there, I can be a hundred percent sure of the decisions I have to make. I'm gonna give you both a little more time to let that sink in, and then I'll have Billie come back to make some adjustments and get him ready," she added softly. "Take your time; we'll start late if we have to, and I promise I'll do my part and use all my skills to do the best job I possibly can to make this right. You will keep your leg and walk on it again, Jamie, if I have anything to say about it."

It was more than an hour later after Frank had decided to take the afternoon off once more and arrived to support Eddie and wish his youngest well that Jamie's gaze once again stilled and he was pulled away from his wife and father as she was forced to watch them wheel him down that hall once more and wonder exactly how much of him would come back.

* * *

 _So poor Jamie is still facing an uncertain future although we know already he gets through at least as far as that hillside before things possibly come off the rails permanently as the added stress of the fall he suffered might just be enough to do him in on this front although it won't be not for nothing if he's able to save his brother at that point. Next, Frank contends with an irate daughter-in-law as they wait for word from the operating room and he catches on to what Erin has really been up to._


	50. Chapter 50

_Site seems glitchy this morning... receiving error messages earlier while trying to post. Hoping it takes this time!_

* * *

Chapter 50

"So are we going to talk about this, or what?" Frank asked after an uncomfortable silence had permeated the room for the better part of an hour after he arrived as planned just before Jamie had been scheduled to be taken in for pre-op. He wanted to see his son beforehand, but also give Eddie some space considering the events a few days previously. Jamie had been pretty far gone already by that point, however, and had barely registered his father's presence after another visit from the anesthesiologist left him sinking away peacefully from the obvious tension now emanating from a certain blond-haired woman in the room.

"I'm going to go with 'or what,'" came the chilly reply back.

"Sweetheart, I know you're tense because this is another long, complicated surgery… but is there something else I'm missing here?" Frank pressed on with a concerned, puzzled tone while growing in worry now that her shift in attitude wasn't just from the prolonged stress over her husband for the past week, but perhaps something more.

"Oh, that's right, I'm upset and not coping well considering we were just told that after all this Jamie only has like a one percent better chance of keeping his leg than losing it… maybe even today... so why don't you just wait until I leave, or I'm 'not willing, unavailable, or otherwise unable to serve' so you can ask them all about it yourself?" she snapped back.

"Edit Katalin!" Frank reacted to that news and this uncharacteristic cold rebuff from his newest daughter-in-law, although that familiar wording quickly clued him in as to what was instigating this reaction.

"Only _my_ mom or dad calls me that!… or Jamie…" Eddie trailed off with her gaze still averted and the undeniable implied implication that her father-in-law wasn't held in the same category anymore… a thought that hurt just as much as everything else right now since she had clung to the Reagan family as surrogates for her own over the past year and a half, particularly Frank and Henry as patriarchs while her own father was incarcerated, but at the moment she found herself feeling pushed away… obviously when the chips were down and the wagons circled around one of their own, she had been left out of the inner sanctum and considered untrustworthy… _perhaps that was just the impression the Janko's left on the holier than thou blue-blooded clan of top cops from Bay Ridge,_ she thought irrationally.

"Eddie," Frank softened and tried to close the distance between them even as she moved away slightly further down the window seat where she was now staring down below at the still white campus on a gloomy gray winter afternoon that perfectly reflected her current mood. "Honey, you need to talk to me," he insisted and refused to give in and joined her there. "Some of this is about the form that we all signed? Help me understand why that's upsetting you so much," he started although the revelation about Jamie's chances in surgery was honestly what was shaking him again right then and now.

"We? _We_ didn't _all_ sign anything!" she cried as she pulled the copy out from under her purse where it lay next to her and shoved it at him. "Here! You show me where I signed THIS! The only reason I knew anything about it was because Marguerite gave me the original back after she scanned it… Jamie thinks it's just something Erin did to protect _us_ in case of an emergency, but I know it's because she doesn't trust _me_ … she never has, ever since he got sick on the job and then everything at the bridge with Kaylin… but I never expected it from you, Frank. I thought you knew how much I loved your son and your family… that I would never even think to come between you and him no matter what! What's next? A custody agreement over Kaylin? Over this baby? Am I allowed to make decisions for the child inside of me or did I somehow give up those rights too when Jamie and I said 'I do' and I took the Reagan name?"

"Eddie, no… that's not what this was for," Frank's expression blanked at that outburst as he looked over the papers once more to see if he was indeed missing something, trying to put together why this had become such a trigger point. "Jamie already made you his medical proxy when you got married and did all the paperwork for the department… you both signed those months ago. That's why your name is just listed at the top here and why I needed to call you when he was first hurt… we needed your permission for the surgery. You're his wife; it's your place… this is just in addition to that. See? An addendum in case something happens and we can't get in touch, that's all. I was under the impression that Jamie spoke to you about it when Erin drew this up; I swear to you," he added as he carefully folded the form even as he started to connect the dots over his daughter's comments of staying 'under the radar,' and her vehemently expressed opinions during the impromptu meeting the other night at the family home. "I can see now that I was wrong about that and I'm so sorry... this is not on you and certainly not because you've ever done anything that warranted mistrust. I'll speak to her… Erin is apparently having trouble respecting her boundaries here. It's not the first time such a thing has come up in regard to her younger brother, but this will not happen again," he vowed before pulling Eddie in for a much-needed hug against his shoulder. "I promise you. Now, please," he begged. "Tell me about Jamie… what did Dr. Kenzie say? There's been a complication? What is it? He was fine when we were here to see him yesterday. That whole hostage situation seemed to have him agitated at first but then when we spoke about it and went over 49s from Renzulli and talked through the shooting team's investigation he calmed down when he saw that Officer Anderson's actions were justified."

"They did a test this morning," Eddie explained with a sniff and she leaned into his touch, the sincerity of his voice struck her and she no longer felt the need to pull away from the warm comfort of his presence. "There might not be enough blood flow to the bottom part of his femur to make it heal right… she's going to try to make it better today, but no promises…" she trailed off. "Fifty-one, forty-nine she told him, those were the odds now, and he got so angry… he was thinking of giving up before that. Kenzie said she did it on purpose because she needed to see if he would fight before she did the surgery… if that one percent would make a difference, but then I had to say it again, we both did… that she had permission to do what she needed, and I did it even though I thought you didn't trust me to anymore because of this paper. I'm disappointed in myself too, just so you know… and after the way I've handled all this," she added painfully with a sweep of her hand around the room. "I didn't think you had faith anymore that I could speak for Jamie on my own."

"Oh, honey," Frank took a deep breath after pushing his glasses back and pinching the bridge of his nose as he squeezed her shoulder again and cursed the fact this had come off in that light. "Don't ever think that, Edit Katalin," he added deliberately. "And don't sell my son short, or ever let him do it himself. Jamie has more strength inside than he gives himself credit for, and so do you. We'll get through all of this together no matter what happens. You are my family now and I thank God everyday that he and my grandchildren found such a strong, caring soulmate, wife and mother in you. Have faith in that, believe that, and don't ever for one more second doubt that I'm not incredibly thankful and proud to be your dad now too."

###

"Eddie… Eddie wake up. Marguerite was just in. It's over... Dr. Kenzie will be out in a few minutes to talk to us," Frank revealed as he watched her stir from her place on the bed where she had fallen asleep curled up on her side with her arms wrapped around a pillow in lieu of a missing husband while the surgery had dragged on longer than expected with just occasional reports filtering out to let them know things were still going as planned. A glance at the clock showed it to be nearly eight o'clock… well past the original estimate of five or six hours.

"I fell asleep," she stated the obvious while sitting up. "Why… why did it take so long? Did she say?"

"No, only that it was over and Jamie was doing okay; he's back in recovery now, thank God… and here she comes," he straightened up to look as Kenzie could be seen stretching before hitting the button on the wall to open the double doors in the hallway, and he prayed he was reading the doctor's body language the right way… after years filled with moments like this, first off and on with the kids… Joe when labor had dragged on when he was born and Jamie from the moment they found out he was conceived, the two souls lost between them... with his mother Betty's heart and then Mary and the cancer… Joe again… through all the officers hurt or killed in the line of duty since he came on the job and rose to the top office… if there was one thing Frank Reagan was an unfortunate expert at, it was reading doctors as they came through doorways to deliver news, and to him she looked tired but satisfied… or at least maybe hopeful, not sad and defeated as she would if she was about to reveal the fact that his son's fight to keep that leg was over… or worse. "He's alright," he added confidently out loud while grabbing his daughter-in-law's hand. "You'll see; I'm sure of it."

"So we're done for today," Kenzie announced as she came in the room and sat down, kicking the doorstop on the way in to afford privacy once more which instantly turned Eddie's stomach and she sucked in a breath to hold while she waited for the rest of it. "He came through the anesthesia much better this time, and he's in recovery and stable. Billie is keeping an eye on him right now and we'll talk about what's going to happen going forward in a minute because the three of us… Drs. Swanson, Martin and myself had some thoughts on the strategy we should take in the next 48 to 72 hours. The bone matrix is in place and Jamie successfully received the intramedullary nail so that big external metal mess is gone which everyone will be thankful for. I know things ran longer than we thought they would, but both Dr. Martin and I tag-teamed a good deal of microsurgery grafting some blood vessels and nerves and we're both optimistic we bumped those numbers a little more in our favor that way," she revealed. "There's some more details to be discussed, but I'm sure that's the gist of what you were wanting to hear so let's give that a minute to sink in."

"Okay," Eddie exhaled finally and nodded in relief. "Thank you for that."

"You said something about a strategy for the next few days," Frank prodded almost immediately though, impatient and unwilling to just sit on that news when he feared it was about to be qualified even though he sensed the pause was needed.

"Yes, so that microsurgery I just mentioned is delicate by definition and most definitely important in the scheme of things right now," Kenzie continued right along as he wished. "We really need those grafts to take and that means giving them some time, so to protect them it's necessary to keep Jamie very, very quiet for the next several days. He's also still having some obvious issues with his metabolism… it's struggling to keep up with his body's needs whether it's due to the anesthesia or not his temp dropped again more than I would have liked, but because we were on it from the get go with blankets and warm air in the vent, it didn't turn into a big problem this time. What we are planning on doing is to have Billie wake him up briefly this evening so you can talk a bit and reassure him if he's not too disoriented, but then we're going to keep him pretty well sedated for the next several days again… not to the extreme of a medically induced coma in case you're worried about that term. He won't be on a ventilator, but we will be using some noninvasive positive ventilation with a mask over his face to give him a chance to really rest and an NG tube to pump him full of the nutrients he needs to start healing. I'm concerned he's anemic and susceptible to just about any opportunistic infection after all of these surgeries. He's wearing himself thin by not getting enough calories, and at this point we need to do something about that too, so he's about to look a whole lot sicker than he actually is with all that going on and I don't want to scare you…"

"How… how long will he have to be that way?" Eddie asked in obvious concern, both immediate and with thoughts on that upcoming OB appointment the following week that she desperately wanted him to be present in some fashion for, even if they had to resort to just a phone call. "Won't he have to go through all that sleep deprivation paranoia stuff again?"

"Hopefully not if we keep this short and the sedation as light as possible so he does get that REM downtime he needs, more likely he might have some vivid dreams, but you know how to handle those. I'd like to do another Doppler on Sunday morning, and if I see improved perfusion in the areas I targeted, then we can start slowly bringing him out of it while weaning him off the blocks as well," Kenzie offered. "The nerves will take more time… we won't be able to tell if those are successful for much longer than that. Next week will be a big one," she cautioned. "He's going to need to manage his pain levels adequately on his own as things start moving… his hip, the knee… all of that's been locked up since the accident and it's surprising just how fast body parts weaken and stiffen when they aren't used, but in this case it was obviously necessary. Aaron will have a big job ahead passively working on range of motion. Jamie can absolutely have no weight bearing for the foreseeable future and that's unfortunate because it usually promotes healing. He'll be fitted for a pretty impressive hinged hip to ankle brace to protect everything though and we will get him up and mobile in a wheelchair as soon as possible. It's a start, at least psychologically," she offered.

"Can we go back and see him now?" Eddie asked as she processed all of that… not the greatest news, but not the worst either she rectified. "I want to be there when he wakes up."

"Actually, I've been kinda pushing the limits on what's allowed here and I need to watch myself," Kenzie admitted as she had been made aware Oliver Wendell had been on site and stalking through the halls during the surgery and she fully expected that he would be back at any moment to debrief her as to the outcome. Finding a couple of "unauthorized" visitors in the back no matter what their pedigree was would not go over well. "As soon as Billie thinks he's ready to come out of it we'll bring him in here instead," she offered. "In the meantime we'll need the room to set up a few things so if you wouldn't mind waiting down the hall I'll have Marguerite and William get started on that."

###

"You know, we have to stop meeting like this," Eddie joked lightly as soon as she sensed Jamie was back among them while she kept herself in his line of vision as those hazel eyes slowly opened and tried to focus. Both the anesthesiologist and her father-in-law were in the room, but remaining on the fringes so that he was not overwhelmed and crowded as he emerged. "People will talk..." she trailed off before growing a little more serious and getting to the point while he was waking. "It's all over, Jamie. The operation is done… you did great, okay? That metal thing is gone and Dr. Kenzie fixed some stuff to make your leg heal better, so now you just have to rest for a few days before you'll be able to start moving more and getting up and out of this bed and then you'll be able to come home for a little in about a week," she encouraged with the glass is more than full, it's overflowing viewpoint which Frank registered from his seat off to the side knowing that both his son and Eddie needed a little of that right now after the events of the last week. The floating bubble of optimism burst immediately though as it became apparent he had slipped backwards, at least presently.

"'Happen'd, Ed?" Jamie rasped in a barely audible voice with a note of confusion. This wasn't going to be that easy… the length of time under general had apparently left him scrambled once more although at least this time he had his wife's name down pat for which she was thankful and paused for a breath.

"You were in an accident… hit by a car in Washington, son," Frank cut in and explained for what felt like the hundredth time over the course of the past eight days or so, hoping that his steady, deep voice would keep both members of the young couple on track as he could see Eddie growing upset that they were seemingly back at square one in that regard again. "You're in New York and have had some surgery, but you're going to be fine."

"Did?" he moaned as the vision of a now-familiar face and conversation flashed in his mind rough on the edges like it was on an old movie reel. "The car… from before. Mason said 'be safe out there'… not to jog 'cross street… sorry, m'fault. Went back, Kaylin has to go to the doctor… but s'not safe don't walk by 'im, Ed. Don't let 'im in the house 'gain. Keep him 'way from her…"

"What is he talking about?" Frank puzzled as he looked at Eddie; even for his doped up son, this seemed to be a departure from his normal drug-induced ramblings although his father noted once more that the Chevelle factor remained. "Who was in the house?"

"Our creepy new neighbor," she explained in a hushed tone with a roll of her eyes wondering why this of all things was coming up now as she hadn't had time to give the offensive older man with the gray eyes so much as a passing thought this week. "His name is Mason Lockwood, and he just moved in down a few doors in that older cape cod. He told us he hates the cold and traffic in New York… to be careful, that crossing the road isn't safe, and then he helped us with our Christmas tree. Jamie doesn't want him near us, and neither do I," she added with emphasis before turning her attention back to her husband who was agitated once more.

"Pr'mise, Ed," came a semi-coherent demand.

"Jamie, I promise not to leave Mason in the house or near Kaylin again," she assured, not realizing that this state was allowing his sixth sense to fire away unrepressed… those thoughts that had been gnawing at his brain but pushed back under the weight of everything else that seemed more pressing. If only someone would listen to those connections between Mason, Joe and the car, but they were still being dismissed as delusional dreams at this point. "Besides, you weren't jogging when you were hit, you were walking with… never mind," she caught herself before wasting more time going down that ironic road and turned her frustration to Billie. "This all happened almost two weeks ago before he left. Can't he ever just wake up like normal?"

"Apparently not," the older man informed her. "I went with the regular mix for him this time after he reacted so badly to my attempt to switch him up. This is better than that," he reminded. "The confusion usually wears off in a few hours."

"When he'll be asleep again," Eddie griped as she sat back.

"Yes, and honestly since he's altered anyway, and it's getting late I'm going to suggest we just go ahead and put him back under so that the staff can get set up before the shift change," he advised. "It's been a long afternoon for everyone including Jamie," he added, not revealing that the atmosphere in the operating room had grown tense several times as the two surgeons debated over the best course of action when Dr. Martin had refused to give a definitive prediction on the viability of the nerve grafts and Kenzie made the decision to go ahead anyway based on her gut feeling they were ahead by more than one percent at least.

"He's right, Eddie," Frank offered as he could feel his own tired body rebelling and stiffening after the tense day and week of sitting around in one hospital chair or another so he could only imagine how his pregnant daughter-in-law was feeling. "There's no sense in prolonging this. We'll stay until he's settled in and then I'll call for my detail and take you home," he put his hand up at her expected protest. "You need your rest and so does he. One of my men will bring your car back for you. Pop will come up to sit with him again tomorrow until you're off work, and then this weekend we'll all get together and see about getting the house set up the way it's needed. Jamie's in good hands here," he assured. "Let the family help now and take this time to recharge yourself too… I promise, we'll all respect the boundaries or we won't be here," he added in a deliberate reference to Erin who was going to feel some of her father's ire the next morning whether she was prepared for it or not. Whichever the case, Frank Reagan was not about to let such divisive tactics as what occurred with that behind-the-back paperwork come into play in his family.

Indeed, just a short time later it was an exhausted Eddie who had permitted herself to be pulled away from a husband now forcibly interned under a cluster of tubes, masks and wires once more and was now leaning up against a firm shoulder in a dark SUV… allowing herself to fall asleep as the car turned and pointed south towards Bay Ridge and ironically towards a man who was preparing to amp up his warfare on the family, although his sights were more set now on a particular NYPD detective than the Reagans in his own backyard.

Jamie was not the only sibling about to have their world turned upside down, and the hits would continue to come from both inside and outside of the family.

* * *

 _Next, our superhero gets some much-needed rest while we check in with some of the other family members. Erin might not be expecting it exactly… she should really though, right?... but Frank is about to deliver a lesson to her about those boundaries. Will she return the favor? While back at the house in Bay Ridge things gear up to ensure that Jamie will be able to be comfortable at home when he's ready for a short leave._


	51. Chapter 51

Chapter 51

"Morning," a familiar deep voice greeted Erin flatly as she exited the front door of her apartment building already dressed and prepared for court with her brief in one hand and a travel mug of high-octane coffee in the other. For a second her heart stopped, and she just stared back at him bug-eyed like a mouse caught in the kitchen with peanut butter stuck on its whiskers waiting for the giant broom to swat down. All the Reagan siblings knew that tone, and there was little need to wonder what had brought her father here for an apparent confrontation so early in the day. The jig was up and she assumed her little underhanded paper pushing scheme had been exposed in some fashion so the game was over.

Still, she was a Reagan after all and refused to go down without a fight… although given that look on Frank's face maybe the better option was flight at this point.

"Dad, what… what's going on here?" she fluffed nervously anyway as he remained stone-faced in his ever present darkened round sunglasses leaning back up against the SUV dressed in his overcoat and customary three-piece suit with his arms crossed in a clearly assertive and frankly scary fashion. "Is everything okay? I have to go... I'll be late for opening arguments in the Andrews trial," she tried to assuage and made a deliberate hard right at the bottom of the steps intent on avoiding him with a beeline track across the street towards the corner parking garage and her car.

"Walk with me," he demanded as he pushed himself away from the vehicle and deliberately cut off her planned escape path before taking the coffee cup and grabbing her left hand tightly like a child's in a crowded space while he led her down the street as he would have Kaylin.

"Dad, I told you I'm going to be late," she insisted again and tried to tug away once more only to have him increase his grasp as a few passersby raised eyebrows at the sight of a grown woman being guided down the sidewalk by the six-four easily recognizable Police Commissioner as the black SUV trolled behind them to add to her embarrassment. "I'm not eight!" she reminded with a hiss as he made her walk obediently all the way to the corner and wait at the curb for several moments until the flashing "Walk" sign indicated it was safe to cross before carefully checking both ways in an exaggerated fashion and stepping off the curb.

"Well, you could have fooled me," he finally broke his silence once they were safely on the other side as his driver put the lights on to make a showy u-turn in the intersection and continue the apparent slow-speed chase back down the opposite sidewalk. "Must have missed the memo that said you grew up and didn't need someone else leading you around by the hand and pointing you in the right direction because they know better. Keys."

"Dad, come on! Is this really necessary?" she griped red faced as he gripped harder and their little walk-a-bout continued before finally coming to a stop at the garage entrance. "I get it!"

"Keys," he demanded as they stood there at an obvious impasse.

"I have to go to work!" she countered. "This isn't funny!"

"No, it's really not when you're an adult being treated as a child, is it? I'll give you a ride," he insisted. "Detective Nucifero will bring your car. Keys," he demanded for what was undoubtedly the last time.

"Fine," she conceded with a cross look before handing them over and turning to slide into the back seat of the department vehicle. "Third level, to the right."

"100 Center Street, Manhattan," Frank directed his driver after joining her and closing the door.

"All right, just out with it," his daughter added with defeat in a lowered tone as they pulled away from the curb considering there was company in the car. "Give me whatever mind-numbing dead philosopher's quote you have queued up about the failings of being overprotective and tell me what a horrible sister I am for wanting to safeguard my little brother when he can't do that for himself, and I'll say I'm sorry so we can be done."

"Can't do that," Frank admitted as he pursed his lips and took in a deep breath while he sat back. "Couldn't come up with one for this."

"Well, then Hell hath truly frozen over," Erin chuffed insolently as she stared out the window and watched the busy morning street traffic pass by.

"Besides, you're not sorry, and then I'd be in trouble for suborning perjury."

"You're right, I'm not."

"Well you _should_ be," he continued before pausing until they had gone several more blocks. "Did you ever once stop and consider how this was going to come off to them… to Jamie and Eddie? To her it feels like she's not trusted by our family now, and considering the relationships she's had with her parent's growing up, especially her father, that was the worst possible thing you could have done to her. And Jamie… what about him? When he finds out… and believe me he _will_ find out now about what you did, you will have forced him to make a decision between the two women that he loves the most… to support you or her. You'll lose, but not before coming between them and that's not your place. If you felt it was so important then you needed to have a conversation with both and ask if they'd be willing to do it then respect their decision; not play one off the other… that's something you've tried to do all your life, Erin Marie. It's an art form for you, and maybe it's what makes you such a successful ADA, but that's the last thing your brother needs right now… a divided family."

"What he _needs?_ Oh, so you're concerned with that now?" she bit back and stayed on her stubborn track while keeping and even, practiced tone. "Family first, unless it's Jamie and he needs _you…_ then it's be more worried about how it looks to the press or the NYPD and put up as many roadblocks as possible in his way because he's your son."

"Maybe I give him more credit than that... Jamie always lands on his feet," Frank grimaced at that unfortunate choice of words before continuing. "He never needed my help in that way."

"Keep telling yourself that, Dad," Erin shot back as her voice raised an octave with emotion and she looked over quickly with obvious tears welling that she was fighting to hold back. "And maybe think about everything he's already sacrificed for you because of it. Remember you didn't do that for Danny when he got put up for the Medal of Valor or was appointed to Major Case by the Chief of Detectives even after that whole disaster with swirling Donald Banse's head in the toilet in that pedophile kidnapping case back when Jamie was first coming out of the academy. Even my cocky big brother admits he should have been assigned to the motor pool after that. Sounds like you're in as much denial as Eddie is. I _have_ tried talking to her this whole past week since he came back up here… no matter what I said or did to help she shut me down and got offended so I figured I'd do this one thing for _him_ without getting her all overwrought about it, but I guess it came out, anyway. I'm sorry if it upset her and I'll tell her that, but c'mon… even Grandpa sees it. Jamie is _not_ landing on his feet alone this time… he's _not_ going to be able to go back to patrol, and the sooner everyone admits that the better for him because he will literally _kill_ himself trying to live up to what the two of you won't accept. I'm the only one that's putting him first no matter how much it hurts, and for that I will _not_ apologize," she asserted and the pair stayed silent for several blocks. "We're here," she informed as the car pulled up in front of the courthouse.

"You need to make this right," Frank insisted as she opened the door to get out and signaled an end to their conversation.

"So do you," she replied coldly before slamming the door and turning to walk up the steps.

###

"Edit, there's someone at the front door!" Eva called from the confines of her room early Saturday morning with a glance at the alarm clock showing it to be just after six o'clock. "Edit? Were you expecting anyone? Is everything okay with Jamison?" she tried again before grumbling as she retrieved her robe and slippers and made her way out into the hall. A quick peek in the master bedroom revealed Kaylin to be still securely snuggled under the covers on her father's side of the bed while the sound of water running in the bathroom left little doubt that her own daughter was up and already in the shower with the intent of making an early trip up to the hospital to check in on her husband who was still sequestered under sedation, but by all accounts doing as well as could be expected. Henry had spent nearly the whole of the day before watching over his grandson and Eddie had taken over the vigil after work with a short visit from Frank as he picked up his father although there was not much to be done but sit and listen to Jamie breathe. Another firm knock on the front door had Eva scurrying down the steps before it escalated to the doorbell and the noise woke her granddaughter. "Who on earth could be bothering us at this hour?" she griped before pushing aside the small side curtain to peer out through the unleaded glass. "Mr. Wilson!" she exclaimed before punching in the code to disarm the alarm system and undo the lock sets after recognizing Eddie's former full-time partner and now sergeant from the 12th even as he stood before her in worn civilian clothing complete with a ripped flannel jacket and carpenter-pocket blue jeans. "What are you doing here so early? It's Saturday… Edit has the day off," she reminded firmly after opening the door.

"So do we, Mrs. Janko," Wilson smiled as he stood on the porch with a cardboard carton filled with a half dozen fresh coffees and a bag of danishes in his hand before adjusting his tool belt as he was suddenly flanked on either side by Kara Walsh and two other men dressed similarly who were then introduced as Officers Righetti and Reynolds, both also from Eddie's home precinct and apparently ready for an indoor construction project given that their arms were loaded with materials. "But we also have a job to do that might take us a while so we needed to get an early start. Kara here is the chief decorator plus painting detail and these two are my plumbing and tile men."

"Mom! Who are you talking to?" Eddie puzzled as she hurried down the steps dressed in comfortable sweats with her wet hair wrapped in a towel. "Oh! Wilson, Kara? Hey, what are all you guys doing here?"

"We've got a bathroom to remodel before one of our own comes home," Wilson reminded as the little procession made its way inside and crowded the foyer. "Scuttlebutt around the house is that Reagan broke his leg and will be out of commission downstairs here for a little while," he informed knowingly to assure Eddie that he hadn't violated her confidence and revealed any more than that as she had tried hard to keep the true extent of Jamie's injuries quiet. "We all wanted to help out and make things easier on you two, well, three… no three-and-a-half," he finally settled on with a grin and tap of his own belly.

"Oh, you guys… this is really too much... I don't know what to say," Eddie choked up as she looked at people who had become much more than just coworkers in the last few years… they were extended family. "But don't you need plans or permits or something first?" she asked as Righetti and Reynolds busily trekked back and forth from the outside bringing in more supplies and tools. "How did you come up with all this so fast?"

"I got people; all taken care of, we're legal… Just reminded the clerk this is an injured cop we're talking about, and I drew these up this week after work," Wilson assured as he pulled out the detailed diagrams and put them on the counter to show her while everyone else continued with their tasks. "Remember, I've done this a time or two before. Good thing you're just about ready to go. As soon as they unload the truck, Walsh is gonna to take you over to my buddy's tile store on the other side of Prospect Park and he'll set you up with whatever pattern you like. The home center on Shoreline is delivering sheet rock, a new wider pocket interior door and a roll-in shower and wet room kit with a base former to set directly on the joists to make a one level room without having to modify any framing… very cool design. Once we blow out that back wall and utilize the laundry closet space Reagan will be able to wheel into the glass enclosure that keeps the water contained and we'll have handholds there so he can slide himself onto a bench. Reynolds here already has a wall mount sink and toilet in the back of his truck so there's more room to maneuver a chair in there."

"But how did you pay for all this stuff?" Eddie demanded as she gawked at the growing pile including what looked like a state-of-the-art sliding multi-head shower system and became more emotional by the second. "Wilson! C'mon, this has to be expensive!" she added as he pointedly ignored her and turned to start inventorying the items. "And it has like a gazillion comfort settings!" she bawled out while reading the box. "Jamie's just gonna… this was the best thing anyone could've… oh, please let me hug you!" she demanded after stuttering though that as her former full-time partner gave thanks the rest of his volunteer crew were outside at the moment and spared the sight as she wrapped her arms around his neck and latched onto his big shoulder for a cry.

"Aw, cripes, I knew I should have brought more ice cream too," Wilson sighed as he offered a pained look at Eva who was of no help and just stood in her slippers and robe with a hand over her face shaking her head at her daughter's continued hormonal outburst. "I told you, it's taken care of… you know I'll always have your back," was all that he would say at first as he tried to soothe her. "We do for our own. Besides Walsh can be pretty persuasive when she's passing a hat around. She even got twenty bucks out of Dexter, and that's sayin' something. He bought the coffee and doughnuts if that makes you feel better," he smirked and straightened her up at arm's length as she sniffled and wiped her eyes with the back of her sleeve. "There, now that you've got that out of your system can we get started, Janko? You're gonna make me look like a big softie in front of the guys if you keep this up, so turn off the baby waterworks and go upstairs and get my cutie Kaylin ready to go out for some breakfast. You and your mom shop and pick out the tile with Kara… Tim said you could have anything in stock and he's already got my materials list. Let the men here get to the dirty work. Just make sure that gigantic attack cat of yours is locked up somewhere before he takes one of us down," he begged with a nervous look around that instantly spotted a pair of green iridescent eyes spying on them with intent from the landing. "I told the guys we didn't have to carry in here today. Don't make me regret it."

###

"So Bear stayed in the den all day because they needed to be up and down in the basement, but he wasn't too mad when we let him out. Guess he's getting used to having other people in the house too. Kaylin remembered to move his food and water and everything else he needed in there all on her own. Aren't you proud of her? You should see what a great job they did, Jamie," Eddie offered quietly with a sniff to her sleeping husband later that evening after her planned trip to visit him had been delayed for just cause as the renovations were nearly completed in the promised single-day time frame except for a few things that needed to dry overnight. "It looks like something out of that decorator Houzz app you love to browse through so much, and it'll make things so much easier and safer for you at home. They did it all for you… for us…" she trailed off sadly as the only answer back was the continued soft whoosh of the equipment allowing him to rest deeply and stay oxygenated with less effort. "Kaylin wants to move downstairs so she can use it too… they even let her help spread all that white goopy grout stuff out on the floor while Righetti was doing the tile so she felt like she was helping. She had a blast and got all dirty so it made her feel better to know she was doing it for you. I'll print some pictures you can look at tomorrow once you're awake again. Even Mom was impressed with Wilson's craftsmanship and you know how overly fussy she is with stuff like that. He got a lot of the materials donated and the rest was covered by everyone at the 12th so we didn't have to pay a penny… just some lunch for the guys and Kara that Mom insisted on buying. Wasn't that so nice of them? I still can't believe they did all that. You'll be able to handle almost everything on your own right from the start," she added with relief knowing how important that was for his self-confidence and paused politely for a reply that was not exactly forthcoming. "They all want to see you get better and come home soon."

A small twitch of his hand offered her hope he was on the verge and listening to her, but a closer inspection revealed subtle eye movements that proved otherwise. Jamison Reagan was entranced in one of his dream states and could be anywhere within his mind at this time. Still that was a good sign given their previous experience with sleep deprivation and delusions so she leaned in with a light kiss against his now scruffy cheek and a ruffle of his messy hair before continuing, anyway.

"Tomorrow morning your Dad and Grandpa are coming over after early Mass and we're going to make sure we have everything else we need ordered that Marguerite said you should have, and Danny and the boys are gonna stop by to move a couple of dressers downstairs from the spare room so we can set them up before he has to go to work. I guess Linda's back is still bothering her since your brother hasn't been around much, but by the time you can come home for a few days… maybe next weekend, right?... we should be all ready for you except for a ramp. We were going to rent a temporary one just until you're on your feet again, but Wilson said the Bay Ridge planning commission has all kinds of permits and inspections you need for that first… you know what control freaks they are because it's a historic district... Don't worry though, Mom said she'd take care of it with the company on this week… that kind of stuff is right in her wheelhouse and God help any of those people if they try to deny us. She thinks it would work out best if we put it to the side door by the driveway so you can come into the kitchen from the deck since you won't have to worry about the sidewalks or the step down in the foyer and it will probably get approved easier because it won't be an eyesore for the neighbors," Eddie continued softly to chatter about the everyday issues they were now facing in an effort to make him feel part of it… even if that reality only existed in her own mind at this point. "Almost everyone's been a huge help," she assured with a flippant note of honesty as she recalled that Erin was for the most part now considered unwelcome in their home but continued to visit here, carefully avoiding crossing paths with what Frank had informed her was a now highly irate sister-in-law.

"Everything going okay in here?" Kenzie's newest nurse, Rebecca, the Washington transplant, queried from the doorway as she once again drew the rookie's lot and had been tagged to fill in for Marguerite on her day off now that the more persistent problem-child Quincy had been moved to another wing and was someone else's responsibility to control. "He's been doing really well today," she assured after stepping in to make a check on medication and vitals. "His lung sounds have even improved which the RT was thankful to hear. I know you're anxious to have him back, but this was a good call… to let him rest. He needed it."

"I think so too," Eddie acknowledged even though it hurt to admit that as Jamie's color had come back and the worrisome gauntness around his facial features had diminished a bit, although seeing that NG tube that was responsible for much of the improvement was still disconcerting as he was being fed a high calorie nutrient-rich formula nearly around the clock. "They'll take that out before he wakes up though tomorrow, right?" she worried with a concerned nod to the item. "He won't like it."

"That's the plan, I'm sure," the nurse offered as she hung up another bottle of the white mixture. "Hopefully this just gives him a bit of the boost he needed. I bet once he's able to get around his attitude and appetite will be better. Aaron was in here for half the morning on his day off working on that immobilizer brace Jamie will be using… making sure all the pressure points are away from his injuries," she informed while doing a thorough bandage check of that aforementioned leg which looked thin and vulnerable now propped up on pillows with the bulk of the metal fixator gone even though it was still encased in heavy brown elastic wrap over layers of white cotton padding. "Poor guy was grumbling about needing a degree from MIT to figure it out but it will be all ready for Monday morning so they can get started. I'm gonna put that automatic ice wrap back on," she informed. "Sorry about the added noise, but it doesn't seem to be bothering sleeping beauty though. It's been so quiet in here the last couple of days," she continued while performing the work. "That Quincy's a hoot; he fills up the space."

"Yeah, Jamie's gonna miss his company," Eddie acknowledged sadly although she appreciated the friendly small talk as she considered her husband's apparent new buddy who had moved on without him. "I think he'll be lonely in here with no one else."

"Oh, I have a feeling he'll still get a few visits," Rebecca laughed as it was an unwritten rule now for the nurses to provide some nighttime access for a certain pair of roaming SEALS. "Besides, we have two new patients… Marines… that will be coming onto the ward Monday for scheduled surgery so he won't be that way for too long. Those guys tend to be a bit more rowdy."

"And then after I'm hoping Jamie can come home for a few days," Eddie added optimistically. "At least for Christmas… that's really important for our little girl. She misses her daddy... he can't be away from her for that, she's only three," she insisted and considered that the holiday was looming close as it fell on Sunday the next weekend and she had failed to finish any of their shopping or other preparations. Perhaps it was time to delegate something else, she considered as the week was already full with trying to prep the home for his return and that OB appointment scheduled for Wednesday. Whatever... the best present they possibly could have was if Jamie could be with them.

"Well, I'll pray all this is working and that test Dr. Kenzie intends for him tomorrow after lunch will have positive results," Rebecca added with a sincere smile as she finished by reviewing his online chart. "He's due to be back in here around fourteen hundred hours if you'd like to be present then so she'll be able to review the results with you. The rest of his morning is filled with PT and directed care from William while he's still asleep… we want to do a thorough job of cleaning and debriding all the surgical sites and changing the dressings on his leg which is a complicated process for now. Better for him if he snoozes through that when possible."

"I'll be here," Eddie promised out loud as a glance at the clock showed the hour was growing late and it was the required time to leave. "Good night. I love you lambchop… sleep well. Don't worry, you'll be better in the morning," she quoted Quincy's apparent favorite song since his nightly serenade was now missing and sealed her goodbye with a kiss on Jamie's forehead before making the long and now familiar nightly trek back to Bay Ridge alone.

* * *

 _Hmm, so maybe Frank got schooled a little at the end there by his own daughter, which was a surprise to me as well since that was not the exact intent when I started to write that bit… can't control where the mind wanders when it hears voices sometimes, lol. For the reviewers expressing concern over the length/involvement of other characters in this installment—no worries if it's not for you. It is slower and a bit different than the previous "werks" but I am enjoying the journey and interaction with a few other authors as it's being constructed and since I write these as an outlet to keep my brain busy, it checks that box for me._

 _So, back to the story, Erin and her father remain at odds over the way the family should handle the situation and she might even have an "I told you so" or two to offer a little further down the road. Next, Danny is targeted with another one of those odd coincidences that will have his mind wandering back to the events from the Blue Templar era once more, and Jamie tries to emerge from his little extended nap during one of his infamous little vivid dreams, but is he ready to face the next series of painful challenges ahead?_


	52. Chapter 52

_Oookay... so it looks like the site had a bit of a hissy fit over the past 10 days or so, but new chapter notifications are going out again along with all kinds of other weird stuff (I'm getting review alerts from 2 months ago today), so we'll give this another try. If you missed them, there were 2 new chapters posted last week while the updates/notifications were not happening. Fingers crossed!_

* * *

Chapter 52

"Since when do two senior first-grade detectives get pulled in for an extra second shift on the Sunday before a major holiday when they don't have any active investigations?" Maria Baez griped as she plopped into her desk chair with a huff and a frown as she looked over at her partner who was unsuccessfully trying to look innocent while keeping a low profile away from her expected wrath. "I was supposed to be baking mantecados and polvorones for Christmas with my mother and sister this afternoon, Reagan! What did you do?" she demanded.

"Ohh, noooo… not the polvorones… the ones with the cinnamon?" he asked with a drawn out heavy sigh as he closed his eyes and licked his lips while quoting his sister-in-law. "Mm-hmm yummy yum. I love those. Did you bring me any, partner?"

"Did I bring you… Seriously? Were you not listening to anything I just said? Now, spill!" she demanded while loudly tapping the keyboard to further display her annoyance while typing in her password to log onto the system.

"Honestly, I didn't do nothing except walk by Carver's office yesterday when she was on the phone with Gormley at 1PP and he was reaming her out because our squad's closed case percentages are down for the last few months. Guess she wanted her top team to catch a few more and bump the numbers up before the end of the year since we're freed up. If you want to blame somebody, ambush that effing George Mahoy sometime… he's the one that's got the system giving everyone real-time numbers now… they got teams reviewing and entering all the data in daily at the precincts. Before that you just had to wait until they ran the audit and your CO got their ass chewed at the next quarterly CompStat meeting. The good old days before the fancy-shmancy stuff," he sighed before trailing off. "Now I see why Jamie hates that car so much."

"So basically what you're telling me is we're on twenty-four seven until New Year's?" Maria moaned and fell into a deflated heap as she put her head down on the desk. "I'll never get those cookies baked or my presents wrapped now."

"That, or until we rack up about ten more in the win column to swing the squad back into the green, but you didn't hear it from me," Danny commiserated. "Linda just about had a fit when I told her last night. I don't know what's gotten into her again. She didn't even want me running over to Jamie and Eddie's today before this to help move some stuff around and I promised to do Kaylin's soccer practice on Tuesday night on top of all that. If things keep up, we'll need this overtime, anyway. Her back's still sore, but she's gotta go into the hospital and get some hours soon or they'll put her on full disability and she'll wind up losing her shift schedule. Somehow we've gotta keep the house and kids going. Jack's learning the finer points of laundry and Sean's on kitchen floor and vacuum duty right now. Lucky for us she had a bunch of vacation time to cash in, but that's running out now."

"Wait! Then that's why were you in here yesterday?" Maria's detective brain fired and latched unto that fact. "We weren't scheduled. I knew it! You came in for OT and got us in trouble!"

"No, I didn't!" Danny insisted. "I was in here on my own time! Mike Becker finally got somewhere with that video footage from Washington, but it's a mess," he lamented. "All the time stamps are screwed up and dated with some kind of garbled numbers, and what he could decode so far wasn't saved in any kind of goddamned order… at least five year's worth of individual days from what we could guess and counting. I gotta click on each one individually and open it and try to figure out when the eff it might have been from. I got lucky because I called Mr. Garibaldi and asked when he put up the big Christmas wreath on the door and he said the day after Thanksgiving, and the light-colored bow is new this year… before it was dark. So all I gotta do is find videos with that in it and it narrows me down to about a two-week timeframe. Spend six hours here yesterday doing that. They take forever to open up on the server too."

"All you gotta do," she mocked. "How many files are there?" she asked with a sympathetic raised eyebrow.

"So far? One-eight-two-five by my count," he groaned with a glance at the tally on the top of the screen and dropped a pencil on the desk.

"Almost two thousand?! And how many did you get through yesterday?"

"About three hundred give or take," he admitted as he stopped to rub his tired eyes. "Found two with the wreath but neither of them look like the right one. Street was shut down for a while after Jamie… you know, and the ambulance must have gone through that way. Haven't come up with any gaps in the traffic pattern like that yet. Rick said they walked down that way beforehand. I'm hoping I can narrow it down and pick them out. Then I'll have my file and the right timeframe," he declared.

"Then what?"

"Well, I guess I'll have to see what cars it picked up coming through just after that and see if there's anything useful. Still it's a grainy picture and a longshot… I'm just out of any other leads," Danny sighed and decided to withhold the tidbit about the glass fragments unless it became relevant since the combined situations with his brother and Linda plus the strain of this wild Chevelle chase was starting to drain him. "It's been declared it a cold case in DC. They're done looking."

"That stinks, ho-ho-ho, bah humbug," Baez muttered with her head still down. "I guess I can help you until we get called out since our board is clean and we're all caught up on paperwork for the first time in… well, I think it's the first time ever. Didn't you tell the boss about this and your brother?" she asked before looking up and seeing him shake his head and remembering that due to added circumstances she was one of the few outside the family privy to that information. "How's Jamie doing by the way?"

"Eddie's up there at Columbia with Dad right now waiting for him to wake up. He was supposed to have some kind of circulation test this afternoon, then if that was okay they were going to start to bring him back out of it now that he's had a chance to rest some more," he revealed sadly and berated himself for only finding the time for that short visit the other day. "Haven't heard otherwise so I guess that's still the plan. There's not a lot of real-time communication out of there with their damn electronics ban though," he added. "Poor kid's really gone through the ringer the past couple of weeks… looks like hell and I have a feeling it's just starting to sink in."

"Jamie, or Eddie?"

"Both," he admitted. "Family's a real mess… let's… let's just not go there," he implored as he turned his attention back to the screen and sent her a link to Mike's folder of files. "Get out your glasses and start from the bottom of the list. I'll keep working down from the top. I feel like we're looking for a needle in a great big pile of... needles," he admitted as the pair got to work while the squad remained quiet for at least a few hours.

###

"How long has it been now?" Eddie asked impatiently as the five o'clock hour came and went with no outward change in Jamie's quiet demeanor as he lay in his room… stripped down to the nasal cannula once more with all the extraneous machinery, mask and tubes removed along with that constant drip of medication that had kept him unnervingly quiet for the better part of the last three days.

"We came before two… the meeting with Dr. Kenzie took about thirty minutes while they got him situated back here and stopped everything… just over two-and-a-half hours, Eddie," Frank calculated as he watched the nervous energy bubble visibly off of his daughter-in-law while she waited to be reunited with her husband once more. "It may take some time yet, sweetheart," he reminded. "They told us it was best to let him come out of it on his own."

"I know… I just don't want it to get too late so that when he wakes up we have to leave right away and then he's alone again. I want him to hear that the test was better today, and she was "cautiously optimistic" because that's what she said, right? I wasn't dreaming then, was I?"

"No, that's definitely what she told us," Frank assured with evident relief himself at the upgraded prognosis. "Just remember the first word of that combination is cautious. We agreed not to focus only on the optimistic part though because she also said the next several days were likely to be very difficult as that nerve block is finally allowed to wear off. On top of that he's going to have to transition to moving around more, wearing that brace and balancing different pain medications before he's allowed to come home for any length. Let's just take one step at a time and try not to put any undue pressure or expectations on him," he advised while reaching over for the tv remote. "Maybe things are finally looking up all around and the Jets can pull off another stunner like last week," he added hopefully until a glance at the screen showed their beloved team behind 21-3 once again at the end of the first half of their home game against the Arizona Cardinals. "Or, maybe not," he sighed. "Want me to turn it up?" he asked as he sat back in the comfortable recliner and put his feet up without looking away as the volume was fairly low. "Thinking of ordering one of these chairs for the living room at home. Best sleep I've ever gotten in a place like this," he sighed, far more content to be patient and wait for his son to wake on his own than a fellow blond-haired counterpart was.

"No, it's fine," Eddie assured as she reached over while he wasn't looking and brushed her hand deliberately up against Jamie's arm with a little pinch in a covert attempt to give him just a nudge back towards them a bit faster anyway… she couldn't help herself at this point. Her efforts appeared initially fruitful and resulted in a definite noticeable twitch of his nose and face for the first time all afternoon. "C'mon… c'mon, Reagan…" she implored under her breath, but then managed to successfully repressed the urge to offer up a deep uncontrolled sigh as there was no further progress evident.

"Told you."

"So when do they develop," she asked with a smirk and a shake of her head as she relaxed and sat back while wondering how her father-in-law was always able to do that. "The eyes in the back of your head I mean."

"In my case, by the time Danny learned how to crawl, but for most others… by the second child at the latest. One you can generally keep in front of you, but with two it's easy to be outflanked."

"How did Mary do it then?" Eddie asked out of curiosity as she considered the fact that for the time being her responsibility level for both their children… Kaylin and this little tangerine-turning lemon munchkin had increased exponentially while her husband was facing his own consuming challenges. "One against four?"

"Well, for her it was a gift… not so much vision but radar, but even with that though I can't say we always saw everything coming. Still don't," he admitted ruefully as he considered the way the conversation with his daughter had ended the other day. "Listen, Eddie," he started before glancing back and noting her downturned face once she realized this was going to segue into a dreaded conversation about the current strife between her and Erin.

"I will not," she interrupted him softly with a sad glance down to Jamie. "I will not bring it up in front of him… not now. It's between her and me and it will stay that way until it's behind us or hearing about it won't cause him harm," she added with conviction. "He's got more important things to worry about. I know that he only agreed to sign those papers because he thought he was protecting me… what kind of wife would I be if I wasn't willing to do the same for him?"

"It's not good to keep secrets from one another either," Frank warned, although he admired her willingness to put a deep dedication to her husband over her own anger. "Don't get started down that road."

"I won't, I promise," Eddie added with another glance at her seemingly stubbornly recumbent husband as she resolved to be more patient before the first strains of a familiar tune caught her attention on the television as the halftime show was winding down with a year-end review of the top game day commercials of 2016.

 _No I can't forget this evening  
Or your face as you were leaving  
But I guess that's just the way the story goes  
You always smile but in your eyes  
Your sorrow shows, yes it shows_

"Oh look," she deflected with an audible snort despite the somber lyrics. "Kaylin saw that Heinz Ketchup 'Wiener Stampede' Super Bowl commercial rerun with all the dachshunds in the hot dog costumes a couple of weeks ago and giggled with Jamie on the floor about it for at least an hour," she explained while laughing out loud herself at the recent happy memory from right before this whole nightmare had started. "They must have flipped back and watched it a hundred times. She begged us for days to buy her a little takeout ketchup packet costume like that little kid in the middle of all those people dressed like condiment bottles. She even put it on her list for Santa complete with the puppy so it could come live with us and kiss her nose too. I'm sure that would start World War III in the house with Bear though, right?" she shuttered with a thought of the cat's reaction to a canine invasion although Jamie had already confessed to desperately wanting a dog one day when their schedules allowed. "He told her once about that time with Renzulli when he was a rookie and had to tackle the hot dog guy… left out the part about the illegal pharmacy they found stuffed in his pockets though," she added with a smirk. "So she assumes people actually walk around wearing those costumes like clothing every day. Don't even think about it, Grandpa," she warned while catching his pensive look and twinkling eyes. "We'd never get her out of it."

"S'your fault, Ed," came the slurring, interrupting, raspy, dry voice they had been waiting to hear from all afternoon although those words stopped her in her tracks and instantly wiped the smile off her face while crushing her heart down in her chest. Frank's chair came thudding down and he quickly stepped over to steady his daughter-in-law even as Jamie remained firmly out of reach while he emerged still seemingly under the influence of one of those vivid dreams that no one but Joe had ever been able to draw him out of.

"S'all your fault."

###

"Baez, Reagan… you're up," came the call from the duty sergeant after six that evening as the pair sat back from their monitors and shook off over two hours of eye strain which had cleared another hundred or so videos from the list, but there was no joy in Mudville—the mighty Danny Reagan had struck out again, he thought ruefully.

"Where to boss?" Maria called back as she gratefully logged out of her computer and opened the drawer to grab her gun and badge only to watch her partner stop in his tracks as if flashfrozen when the gruff reply came back.

"400 block of Washington, just down from the local park. Some stiff got pumped a few times and dumped in the alley there."

"Danny, isn't that where…?" Baez trailed off with a gasp.

"Yeah," he swallowed hard. God, he hated that particular place. It was the one area of the 5-4 territory that he tried to avoid at all costs. At the mouth of the alleyway there catty corner from a school on the opposite side of the street was where it had happened. He could still picture the dark pools of blood that once lay on the ground there. Joe's blood. It was there his younger brother had lay dying after taking four shots to the chest from the armor piercing rounds loaded in Sonny Malevsky's gun after purportedly chasing a rabbiting perp. It was an evil place, of that Danny was sure.

"You alright, Reagan?" Maria asked with growing concern as all the color had drained from her partner's face and it was obvious he was anything but that.

Gonsalves… Malevsky… Joe's effing Chevelle that Jamie kept insisting ran him down. The glass fragments that didn't dispute that claim. Now this call to that alley of all places. All of these "coincidences" his father didn't believe in. Suddenly he was afraid of what he might discover if they actually found the right needle in the needle stack. Danny's head was spinning and he would have been lying if he said the room didn't do a turn or two of its own before he righted his balance enough to to grab his coat and shake it off enough to leave for the scene. For one of the few times in their partnership he let Baez drive without objection.

What was next?

"Vic's name is Joseph O'Connor."

Danny's eyes snapped over in disbelief at the senior uniform from the first radio car on scene as they stood with Baez to the side of the prone figure lying still in the street and now covered under a yellow tarp. "Come again?" he asked incredulously as his breaths came in short gasps. "Who _is_ he?"

"What's with you?" Officer Matt Kocher frowned at the detective's tone as he handed over an evidence bag with a license enclosed. "You look like you've just seen a ghost, Reagan. I told you; ID reads as Joseph O'Connor. According to his rap sheet he's a local low level drug dealer. Been busted more than a dozen times in this area."

"No, I mean WHO THE HELL IS HE AND WHY WAS HE DUMPED ON THIS CORNER TONIGHT?!" Danny spat. Surely the likelihood of a man with nearly the same name as his dead brother being tossed out on almost the exact spot where he had died amid everything else that was going on could only mean one thing. "There's no way this is a COINCIDENCE!"

"Hey, I don't know what the eff you're talking about, and even if I did that's way above my pay grade isn't it?" Kocher barked back as he handed a clipboard over to Baez so she could sign off on the transfer of evidence. "I've been here for all of twenty minutes. Vic bought it with four to the chest and was dumped. Last I looked you two make the big bucks. Got questions? Go detect," he gruffed before moving away.

"Danny, what the hell?" Baez demanded as she kneeled down and pulled the tarp back to reveal a twenty-something thinly built red-haired victim lying on his back staring straight up in the air with glazed over eyes and four obvious holes in a dirty white shirt. "You know this guy?"

"No… it's just… the name and everything," he stuttered with obvious stress and a nervous swipe of his hand over his head with a pointed glance around as she looked on in concern. "I'm telling you right now there's more to it than someone offing a local drug dealer," he rasped in a low voice. "I can't get into it right now but I think they've been coming after us again," he revealed as his blood ran cold and his own stomach began to twist. He felt like he had stepped into some kind of Twilight Zone episode. First the cat at Kaylin's school, Eddie's tampered with car and Jamie worst of all, then that damn badge laying in the front of his own house, the glass from an old GMC and now this dead Joseph O'Connor guy gets flung out here on _this_ goddamned street.

"Who? Danny, you're not making any sense!" she hissed and worried that her own partner was apparently losing his grip on reality right here and now.

"We can't talk now. Let's process this scene and get this guy to the M.E. We'll meet down there tomorrow first thing in the morning, and if there's anything to this, I promise I'll explain. This was before your time," he revealed with a tight look. "And Baez," he added as he prepared to walk away for a private conversation with an old friend as he pulled out his phone. "Watch your back."

* * *

 _Ha, had to throw in a few little teeny minor cliffies there just for kicks or it wouldn't be me. What exactly is Jamie blaming Eddie for, and how will Danny handle things now that the pieces are starting to fall in place? Who might he be calling in for help? Someone you might never guess! Next, since it's been a while we'll check back in with Jamie in the present to see where things stand above the bridge as he waits out another hour. When last we left him up there *many, many* chapters ago (sorry!) he had a major moment of hope when the phone rang with Eddie's caller ID. Has anyone come looking for him yet? Kind of a crazy slide down for him as his mental state deteriorates before we pop back in and see how that relates to the past._

 _PS: if you're looking for a smile and don't remember that Heinz Ketchup wiener commercial, you can watch the extended version on YouTube, just search for aNN9nL2vppM._


	53. Chapter 53

Chapter 53

 _March 14, 3:35 am_

 _No, I can't forget tomorrow  
When I think of all my sorrows  
When I had you there but then I let you go  
And now it's only fair that I should let you know  
What you should know_

I can't live, if living is without you  
I can't give, I can't give anymore

I can't live, if living is without you  
I can't give, I can't give anymore

 _Visions of dachshunds dressed as hot dogs crying out in snarling barks, yips and howls as they stampeded towards Kaylin and another child dressed in little takeout pack costumes..._

 _Jamie's eyes snapped opened and his lungs sucked in a deep gulp of cold air which brought him back to his senses as he jumped awake after having drifted off despite every intention not to succumb to the hypothermia that was slowly but surely sapping the remaining strength from his body. Air Supply, he groaned after remembering this ironic name of the band as the painful fact that it hurt to breath resurfaced. What was it with the damn hot dog references in his life? Must be Renzulli's fault, he mused. Never met a guy who appreciated a street vendor dog like he did. His old TO's meal break culinary preferences and that time he'd sent his rookie down the street after that costumed drug dealer didn't explain what had caused an innocent silly commercial he once giggled over with his daughter to morph into this trigger, this recurring damn dream… no slash that… EFFING DAMN VIVID NIGHTMARE OF EPIC PROPORTIONS that had been haunting his sleep far too often in the middle of the night for the past however many months since… well it didn't even matter anymore as it mixed with reality and gelled together in his cold, tired brain before he realized that he had once again woken from it in a heavy sweat, and in fact here that served as a deadly threat to his life on its own as he felt the cold now emboldened and seeping under that ultra techy lightweight insanely expensive primaloft jacket that Eddie had bought him as his body began to falter faster while Sonny Malevsky's voice continued to mock him from beyond._

" _Reagan."_

" _Hey, Detective Malevsky. What's going on?"_

" _We didn't get a chance to talk the other day," came that snide, evil laugh and look Jamie now knew intimately Sonny had inherited from his father Mason… that same look he had seen tonight before it was erased by gunshots as more bodies fell in this Reagan-Malevsky family feud. "Your brother, Danny... what a hot dog. Grandstanding that judge. He's a good detective, though. So was your brother Joe."_

" _That's what people say," Jamie had replied suspiciously with evident good reason now while they stood outside the precinct._

" _You know... we worked together, in the Warrant Squad," Sonny had continued, "Lydia Gonsalves worked there, too, but... you knew that already. Boy, I bet, with your brother killed in the line of duty, your family worries about you. Just... make sure you're careful. It can be dangerous out here. Nice car."_

 _Those lines, "What a hot dog… Your brother killed in the line of duty… Nice car," Jamie realized suddenly… that was it. The dream, his brother dressed in the drug dealer's costume clutching Kaylin and the other in the takeout packs and keeping the dogs away. His sixth sense had been virtually screaming out with another connection for the past few months. Why hadn't he listened sooner?_

" _I'm sorry, Danny," he cried. "It should have never come to this! You were just trying to protect us and figure out what happened. I didn't want to listen and let you down! STUPID!" he railed against himself. The answer had been there all along he realized as the tears fell freely now and mixed with the frozen blood on his jacket to form tiny pink trailing ice ball tracks. Danny's blood. He was laying there covered in his own brother's blood after pulling him away from the burning car, already nearly unconscious. That's how they would find him if other things didn't get there first, he decided, and it wouldn't be long now. The only thing keeping that pack of wild wiener dogs, or more likely coyotes at bay… the ones that had been vocalizing and circling around the valley now for the last hour was probably the acrid stench of the burned rubber down below. He moved his left arm up once more to squint at the blurry timepiece which seemed to have frosted over… probably not a good sign. Four hours… halfway, right?… He'd made it halfway, but to what? He wasn't even sure any more. All that anxious waiting after the phone rang and still nothing had happened… no more calls… no returning sirens… no one shouting out his name. Danny must be gone and everyone in shock… no one was thinking straight, not even his own wife. Maybe it would be better to just give in and stop fighting it… to just drift away from the pain and let the inevitable come sooner now… to disappear and become a memory with his two brothers just like he was in that dream when his little girls were left vulnerable and his family moved on without him._

" _EDDIE, WHERE ARE YOU?!" he reacted with unfair anger and pent up emotions directed at her for the first time. "S'your fault, Ed… why didn't you come? S'all your fault," he croaked out softer that time, allowing himself to wallow in a deep state of self pity for a few minutes until he found the motivation to push it aside as another memory resurfaced and a deep regret set in._

" _M'm sorry… m'm sorry… Please baby, don't cry. Damn it… I didn't mean it, Ed… s'not your fault… it's all mine. I don't know why I said that," the words echoed through his mind again and he could almost feel her sobbing against his shoulder once more as she cried out from the guilt he had just inflicted on her. He couldn't do that again, not even if he would die here tonight and she would never know about it._

" _It's me… I've always been too weak… m'not trying hard enough," he apologized as the words came out loud this time. "Rigs said not to be scared of things like this when they come…" he trailed off as he remembered some of those first conversations with a man who had no doubt immensely influenced the rest of his life, no matter how long or short that might be right now. A few more lonely moments passed before he had gathered himself to continue. "They're just in your head… mental circuses supposed to wear you down, to break your spirit, to force you to quit… but the pain lets you build strength and… resiliency… embrace it.. makes you try harder... Jesus, Ed, if that was the case I'd be able to get up and walk outta here and find you… please, I don't wanna make the circus list anymore. I don't think I can do it again, and I am scared… I don't want to leave you or let sweetness and the baby grow up without me…"_

" _No one wants a circus," Rigs had told him. "A circus meant two hours of additional calisthenics for that day you didn't measure up… that there was more mental and physical fatigue to come, and more fatigue meant that the following day would be more difficult—and more circuses were likely. But at some time during SEAL training, everyone… and I mean everyone…. makes the circus list, and an interesting thing happens over time to those who were there constantly… they got stronger and stronger. Life is filled with circuses, son. You will fail. You will likely fail often. It will be painful. It will be discouraging. At times it will test you to your very core, but if you keep your head down and push through it, you'll come out stronger on the other side."_

" _Circuses and dreams and hot dogs... can't be afraid of th'm," Jamie mumbled to himself once more on that cold, dark hillside as he resolved to find some way to chunk off one more hour before giving up just as his dulled senses picked up on a familiar sound in the distance… an intermittent little jingle-type noise like the barest melody from a far away carousel bell that tinkled and disappeared and came back a few moments later just a tiny bit stronger again this time even as the breeze picked up and the sound of rustling leaves swirling around him in the hollow threatened to drown it out before he could comprehend its meaning as his heart jumped into his throat..._

 _Sirens… they were coming back. His prayers had been answered._

 **SEAL Rule 5: But if you want to change the world, don't be afraid of the circuses.**

* * *

"M'm sorry… m'm sorry… Please baby, don't cry. Damn it… I didn't mean it, Ed… s'not your fault… it's all mine. I don't know why I said that," Jamie closed his eyes and listened to his wife sobs on his shoulder before giving his concerned father a pleading, glassy-eyed look as he fought to bring the blurred face behind that dark caterpillar back into focus. "Please… I don't even 'member 'xactly what 'appened… Kaylin was dressed up like… was it something stupid 'bout ketchup?"

"Yes," Frank assured as he attempted once more to peel his emotional daughter-in-law off his still drowsy and obviously confused son. "Eddie, he was dreaming sweetheart, you know that. He was just all mixed up again coming out. You said yourself he watched that commercial a hundred times with Kaylin the other week and it was on while he was waking. Now c'mon and sit back up here… there you go. Isn't there something important you wanted Jamie to hear? You've been waiting to tell him for hours. I was wrong before. Let's focus on that second part," he reminded gently as he was finally successful in prying her away. "I think you both need a bit of that optimism right now."

"Wait, why're... you wearing different stuff?" Jamie puzzled as the bare minimum of his senses returned… enough to realize his wife and father were not dressed as he remembered when he had been taken back for that surgery. "Day is it?"

"It's Sunday night," Eddie sniffed and wiped her eyes as she tried to compose herself after the shock of hearing those words had driven her back into a state of absolute guilt over the situation amplified by hormones once more. "No, don't be afraid… Jamie, nothing went wrong," she added quickly as she saw a flash of fear cross his face once he realized what that could mean and she cursed the fact that despite her resolve she had done it again and was forcing him to wake up into another panic attack, especially after a deliberate glance down at his injured leg revealed a far smaller bulge under the blanket then had been familiarly present before. "Jamie, look at me and breathe," she demanded and then waited until his frightened eyes came back up to meet hers while her hand caressed his cheek. "Nothing's wrong," she repeated with a kiss on his forehead. "I'm so sorry I scared you. Dr. Kenzie wanted you to rest for a few days to make you feel better and get stronger so they kept you asleep… she took that metal thing off and put the other stuff inside and fixed some more blood vessels. The other doctor worked on the nerves. Your leg is there," she assured. "When the block wears off, you're really gonna feel it, but they didn't want to stop everything at once so probably by tomorrow morning. They did that Doppler test downstairs again today, and it was a lot better. Your number is higher now… cautiously optimistic, that's what she said. Those were her own words, lambchop... I swear. You can ask her yourself when she comes in to check on you before she leaves tonight," she urged as picked up his hand before bringing it to her face to hold and kiss the back of it. "You did it, Jamie… our prayers have been answered."

"Yeah?" he huffed as relief washed over him and he relaxed back and closed his eyes for a second to let that sink in. "Promise? M'my throat's sore."

"I promise that's exactly what she told us. I'll get you some ice chips. You had that little tube in to give you liquids and stuff, but it's out now and Aaron's already been in to get you fitted with the brace so that you can start getting out of bed… maybe even into the chair here tomorrow. I'm so proud of you," she encouraged as she continued to pepper him with gentle kisses. "You'll be able to get better so much faster, now."

"S'good, right?"

"It's very good," Frank agreed as he stepped into offer his own assurances although the pragmatic side of him felt the need to temper that with the reality he knew his son would soon be facing and the words that came to him were a familiar reflection of the time when he served in a uniform other than that of the NYPD. "Jamie the next part of this is not going to be easy," he added in a tone he knew would capture his youngest's focus to the greatest degree he was capable of at the moment and he waited until those tired, but now hopeful hazel eyes were locked back on him. "There are days when you will fail and be discouraged, son. It's going to be painful, especially in the beginning, and it will test you like nothing else you've ever had to do before, but you're strong and you _will_ get through this. We're all going to be there for you though and don't be afraid of it or get down on yourself when it doesn't come easy. I know this is pot calling kettle, but promise me you'll ask for help when you need it, alright? Remember, there's no shame in that."

"S'sir," Jamie managed to rasp out through a dry throat, still impaired to a large degree and only marginally aware of the vastness behind what was just spoken by a father who was obviously fighting to control his own emotions through this. Danny was not the only one in the family to be affected deeply by Jamie's injury as well as this place that had brought them in contact with wounded soldiers in familiar straights, and Frank had found himself haunted by things he'd seen in the past that he thought had been tucked away for good years before too.

 _You will fail. You will likely fail often. It will be painful. It will be discouraging. At times it will test you to your very core._

###

"So he's really doing better?" Danny asked eagerly as he received an update from his father after nine o'clock that evening just as he pulled the car up to the curb outside Verdi's Pub in the quiet Whitestone section of northern Queens, a sleepy forgotten waterfront neighborhood of tree-lined streets, manicured lawns and salty breezes off the East River. Ironically at that moment he found himself less than ten miles away from Columbia Medical Center, but well over a thirty minute drive over the bridge even at this hour. "It's too late to come visit, right?"

"Yes, it's already after hours, detective," Frank informed his oldest with a small frown as the street lights flashed by outside the SUV's windows while he and Eddie were on a now familiar path home together to Bay Ridge. Danny had been preoccupied and distant that week and the two had not met face-to-face or spoken since that unfortunate incident after the meeting the other night as the Staten Island contingent of the Reagan family had begged off on Mass once again since Linda was not feeling up to the drive or an hour sitting in the pew that morning and Frank and Eddie had already departed before Danny and the boys had arrived solo for a quiet dinner with Erin, Nicki, Henry, Eva and Kaylin. "We just left him… he was up for a few hours, had some soft food and they gave him something mild to help him through the night, but he definitely looked better coming out of it and the news about his leg was encouraging. By tomorrow morning the block should have worn off though and Dr. Kenzie warned us this will be a difficult week. It would be good if you managed to get up there and see him," he added in a tone that let Danny know in no uncertain terms that his father was a bit disappointed in his previous efforts. "He needs everyone to be positive. I know things have been hard with Linda, and the last visit don't go well, but…"

"I will, tomorrow if I can, Dad… I promise, but we just caught a case," Danny vowed as he parked and turned the ignition off before revealing what would no doubt catch his father's attention the next morning when he reviewed the DD5's as was his habit. "Body dump on Washington," he explained carefully while hoping to downplay the rest by leaving out the first name. "Local drug dealer named O'Connor."

"Washington, you say… anywhere near…?"

"Yeah, same place," Danny cut him off and disclosed the current reason for his distant attitude. "Listen, I gotta go… I'm meeting a CI up in Queens in a few. I dropped Baez off at the 5-4 to start the paperwork and see what she could dig up on this dead guy so I gotta get back. I promise I'll get up there to see the kid tomorrow if I have a chance."

"All right, but I'd like to talk some time soon too, son," Frank asked quietly as Eddie shifted against his side once more, already succumbing to her exhaustion. "There's been a lot going on with everyone."

"I know, Dad… it's just… I'll try, okay?" Danny answered, already uncomfortable with that notion given the events of the last private conversation the two had shared. "I'll be in Bay Ridge Tuesday night for Kaylin's soccer practice. Maybe I can stop by afterwards. We'll talk more then. Later," he finished before ending the call abruptly and putting the phone down as he nervously regarded the bar's front door and checked his watch. This was a road he had never envisioned going down again, but frankly if the last time taught him anything it was that there was no one in the NYPD or FBI that could be trusted and he desperately needed a player on the outside of the family to help him look into this mess given the present state of the Reagan clan since it seemed like one more piece falling out of place was going to bring the whole Jenga tower down around them all. That meant coming to the one person he knew he could trust with this… that was if they bothered to show up to this meet since no one had been in or out of the front door since his arrival.

A sudden metallic _tap tap_ on the driver's glass frayed his nerves down to the bare wire and he jumped in place and automatically reached for his gun.

"Jesus," he complained as he hit the button to roll the window down. "You of all people should know better than to do that to me."

"Hey, I do, it's just fun. What's this about, Danny boy? Been a while."

"Back by popular demand?" he answered as his eyes took in her appearance which was definitely softer and more feminine than he ever remembered seeing before, and if he was forced to admit there had always been a chemistry between them that left his eyes lingering on certain parts of her for longer than they should have. "Maybe it's time for a reunion tour. You look good. C'mon Jack… we doing this out here or do you want to go inside and get a drink with me? I'm buying."

"Well, hell does freeze over every once in a while doesn't it?" she smirked while remaining starkly suspicious of this sudden blast from the past, knowing his propensity for using people as he saw fit. "Inside I guess as long as it's for, uh, a farewell appearance, one night only. Now what's going on?" his former partner Jackie Curatola demanded again after they had made their way inside to a dark booth in the back and sat nursing a pair of scotches for a few minutes as the awkward tension continued to brew between them. "You look like crap, Reagan, even in this lighting. What gives?"

"So, it's nice up here," Danny deflected with small talk again as he looked across the table uneasily, knowing what he was about to ask would not be received well. "Kinda like a small town surrounded by the big city. Still working private security for that import guy out of Malba? Guess from what I heard it came with some perks you didn't have with me."

"For the most part, but you already know that Danny Reagan. After I took my leave I figured out being away from all the stuff that we saw every day was the best thing I ever did for myself. I have a nice life here, and I found those good people I needed around me after Bobby and I got together. We're talking about rings… family, settling down. I told you when I left that I didn't think I could erase the things I saw on the job, and maybe I can't completely… but they're covered up now for the most part, and they're gonna stay that way."

"Sometimes they don't, Jack," Danny finally pushed forward at that provided opportunity. "Sometimes things you think are buried and long gone come back to bite you in the ass again."

"Okay, if you say so. Why don't you just cut the crap and get to it then?"

"Because I'm gonna ask you to do something, Jack, I know you're not going to want to do it, but I need this. You know that Jamie got married and has a little girl now, right?" he started to explain.

"Yeah, sure… from that accident at the bridge last year. I saw the articles with your Dad about him adopting her and still follow the society pages so the wedding announcement a couple of months ago jumped out. Cute blond. She's on the job too, right? God bless them if they can keep it together and make it work through that. Saw he moved up to sergeant, and he's involved in some NYPD program for EDPs. Good for him; Jamie was always a sweetheart."

"Well, him and Eddie… they just found out they're having another baby in June. What you didn't hear though is what Dad's been able to keep quiet… that Jamie went down to Washington last week for a meeting and someone hurt him bad, Jack. Tried to make it look like a hit and run… broke his leg, shattered it really and some other stuff inside. We're lucky he lived through that first night. He just woke up again tonight after having his third or fourth surgery on Thursday. I can't even keep track of them anymore. Had to fly him up to Columbia Med in Upper Manhattan. That's where he is now in some kinda study… they're trying to save it, but I'm not sure that's gonna happen. Even if they do, he's probably done on the street."

"Damn, Reagan. I'm so sorry," Jackie's brow furrowed as she tried to connect the pieces with what he had already told her, knowing how close Danny was with his brother even if the two sometimes butted heads over their opposing styles in the family business. "No wonder you look so bad. But why are you here? You think it's someone in the department? It was a hit?"

"That's just it, Jack; I don't know. Detective in DC wrote it off already… there's hardly any evidence and no witnesses we can find that saw anything useful," he admitted as he took another long sip from his glass. "There's just some names coming up around the family again lately… Lydia Gonsalves, Sonny Malevsky."

"They're dead, Reagan."

"Yeah, that's what I was trying to tell myself at first. Jamie can't remember anything about the accident unless you believe that he got run down by Joe's old Chevelle. Crazy, right? Must have banged his head, except he keeps coming up with the same thing over and over again and you know how his brain works. Before you say I'm nuts, I mostly wrote him off too until tonight when I got called down to a body dump on the exact spot where our brother Joseph Conor Reagan died. Vic's name was Joseph O'Connor," he added and paused to let that series of name drops settle down. "I got nothing but a gut feeling here, but something doesn't smell right."

"You think the Blue Templar's behind this?" Jackie hissed incredulously with wide eyes as she was forced to remember that terrifying case that had nearly taken her own life when she was run off the road trying to tail one of the biggest dirty players. The fear of reliving something like that put her in instant denial. "That can't be, Danny… they're finished. Your father smoked them all out in that bar when they came out of their holes, didn't he?"

"Thought so, but it's more like somebody's resurrecting bits of the Templar to jerk our chains again… tossed a badge with Gonsalves' old number out in the street by my house… I think Eddie's car was tampered with… it wouldn't start the day this all happened in Washington. This feels personal, and the family's already a mess over what's happened to the kid. I gotta have something solid before I bring this back on them and I got no one else outside the department I trust who knows what went down the first time. They hurt my brother, Jack. That's why I'm here. He's safe now because he's in a place that gets locked down tighter than Ft. Knox, but I gotta know if he'll stay that way."

"You found a badge with a number she retired, what seven years ago? Did someone else have it since then too? Probably more than one, and you _think_ the car was tampered with or it was?"

"Think, and there's another detective with that number under investigation by IA now."

"Then c'mon Danny… none of that sounds like it has anything to do with the Templar. Why can't it be about this other guy? Maybe he's pissed off at your dad and decided to heave his badge at the nearest Reagan. What's your partner say? 'Cause, it seems like you're chasing this case on your own, and you're only giving me half the information so she probably knows less than that. Are you freezing her out for a reason? I mean, what is it? What, you don't trust her, or... you think she's a lousy detective?"

"What kind of question is that? Maria's not part of this. She's a good cop, a great cop and I do trust her, but unless you went through it the first time, you don't know... you know?"

"I do know… I know how you get tunnel vision and tend to treat your partners as less than that before putting them on the outside of the box when things get personal, but you _can_ trust me, Danny, with anything."

"I already know that… it's kinda why we're sittin' here, Jack."

"Then trust me when I tell you she's the one you need to be talking to... her or your family. You look like hell… no you look like I _felt_ at the end, and maybe it's time you think about doing the same. Somebody hurt Jamie whether on purpose or not, and it's bringing up everything that you never dealt with before when Joe died or you came back from Iraq. Go talk to someone, it's time. Honestly, this all sounds like it's in your head more than anywhere else, anyway."

"It's not! Damn it! Just that nobody else would see it but you!"

"Reagan, you know I would walk on nails for you... but you are asking me to go against everything that I did for myself the past few years. I finally got myself healthy physically and mentally for the first time in forever. I'm happy now, truly happy with my life and I can't afford to get wrapped up in this stuff again. I'm sorry, but it's just too hard to get out once you're sucked back in."

"They almost killed my brother, Jackie. I can't just let that go," he insisted as that inference that this was nothing more than a grief-filled figment of his imagination filled with unrelated coincidences stung more than her refusal. She had never doubted him before, and she knew him so well. Was she right?

"I know you can't, Danny, but I have to," she sympathized softly before standing up and taking her leave. "I am sorry. Give my best to Jamie and the family. Next time you're up this way and want to have a drink… just a drink, give me a call," she added before reaching over to give him a gentle hug and turning to walk back out of his life again.

* * *

 _Ouch. Seems like the Reagan boys are getting pelted with seeds of doubt from some very important women in their lives. Jackie might have a change of heart later, but she's walked out of the story for now. Next up it's Jamie who feels the sting as his sister steps in again to try to influence him before the brothers commiserate as Danny finally travels north for a visit and finds himself making a promise that will come back to bite him in the ass, to use his own words, and set him up for another stunner of his own._


	54. Chapter 54

Chapter 54

"Jamie! Look at you! You're up out of bed already! That's great!" Erin practically squealed with delight as she came around the corner before lunchtime to find her younger brother sitting up in what everyone else considered the comfortable recliner instead of his usual spot. What she failed to notice was the rather stark stare he returned as the effort of getting rewrapped and fitted for his brace and then into that chair had consumed nearly his entire scheduled morning PE session and left him shaky and weak. Just the change to a vertical position after nearly two weeks basically horizontal was completely taxing to his body, and it had taken both Aaron and William supporting him and a plethora of equipment to learn a simple pivot move over. As desperate as he had been to get out of that bed, he was now eyeing a return trip back to its safety as his father had been right… so far today had been rather discouraging and painful as the nerve block was allowed to wear off and his brain reacquainted itself with his intensely sore right hip and the rest of his leg down to his knee although he was still waiting for the blessed numbness to subside below that.

"Hey," he managed to rasp out instead, his voice still a bit raw and rough.

"How are you feeling?" she asked with genuine concern as she reached over and gave him a gentle hug and kiss on the cheek. "Missed talking to you, but Dad said it seems like the rest helped."

"Been better… and worse I guess," he acknowledged with a small sad frown. "Thanks for coming again. Marguerite said you were in a few times since the surgery… not that I remember any of that."

"Of course I came… So… this stuff is kinda cool," she fluffed while trying to judge his attitude given her contentious state with Eddie while feigning interest in some of his new bedside apparatuses which included a swinging angled hand bar on the side and a trapeze grip to help him maneuver in and out. "You always wanted a jungle gym in your room when you were little, remember? I think you scared the bejesus out of Mom that one time when she found you dressed all in black and hanging upside down by your knees from the bar in the closet when she came to tuck you in and you said you were going to try sleeping that way because bats did. She almost called a priest. Dad said you'll have the same stuff at home… they gave him a list."

"Yeah, he said that he was taking care of it with Eddie when they were here last night," Jamie answered showing no apparent concern that there might be tension brewing between his sister and wife as Erin blew out a sigh of relief and thanked God for that small favor. If no one else had brought up the tiff over the papers, she sure wasn't going to be the first.

"So, did they say when you might be able to come home yet?" Erin asked, trying to sound optimistic as she turned her attention back to her brother and noted the intricately padded and adjusted hinged brace that was now covering almost the whole of his leg but still apparently locked at a straight angle.

"Um, Aaron said not until I can do some of this on my own," Jamie reported tiredly as he unsuccessfully tried to suppress a low moan and grimace while he shifted in the seat as the ache in his hip became intense once more and it was growing close to the time for another hit on the happy button as his sister looked over with mounting concern. "I guess I'm behind on that week timeline 'cause I lost three more days. Took two of them to get me over here this morning… Ed shouldn't lift anything now, so I'm not sure," he admitted. "She really wants me home by Christmas Eve at least for Kaylin... I can tell. Gotta try for that… can't let them down. I miss sweetness," he trailed off sadly as the thought of disappointing his wife and daughter like that after all this time of not seeing her just about broke his heart.

"Jamie, don't do that," Erin frowned and the frustration in her tone notched up a bit as in her mind this just further proved her point that Eddie was being unrealistic given his injuries. "Don't risk hurting yourself or get discouraged if you can't… the last thing anyone wants to see is you in worse shape because you're pushing too hard so you don't upset someone else. If it's not safe for you to leave by then… we'll just have to figure out something else. Maybe we can all come here and have a room downstairs like we did for Grandpa at Thanksgiving when he had his heart attack, okay? That way you can spend time with Kaylin but won't have to make the trip all the way home and have to worry about the rest if you're not up to it. Eddie should see that and not be putting pressure on you!" she insisted.

"She's not, Erin… please don't go all ballistic momma llama bear now," he sighed and rubbed his face knowing his sister's propensity to do exactly that but not aware the line had been crisscrossed numerous times by this point. "I just know what she's thinking. Ed's gotta go to her doctor's appointment Wednesday by herself; they already told me I won't be able to get released from this floor even downstairs for an hour to do a video call by that point. It's her turn, and I can't be there for her when she really needs me… imagine how _that_ feels? I don't want her to be alone in case something…" he paused with a heavy heart and a prayer before continuing. "In case they say something's really wrong. Dad already told me he let it slip to you about the baby's issues, maybe you could go with her?" he asked hopefully as he put on his best pair of puppy eyes and continued totally to misread the current situation between the two women. "I mean just stay out in the waiting room to drive her home if she's upset?"

"ME?!" Erin reacted and her mind whirred at a hundred miles an hour trying to figure out how to get out of that one without tipping him off that Eddie would probably prefer pushing her out of a moving car on the FDR rather than accepting a ride along at this point. The classic fall back to work seemed like the best route to take even though it was a complete lie. "Oh, sorry, I have court in the afternoon. What about her mom? I would think Eva would want to be there and it's not too far from your house."

"She can't. Kaylin has her final play practice and a party afterwards and we don't want her to miss that. Pop's going too since grandparents are invited, and you know Eddie and I can't… don't worry, I'll find someone else. Ed says she can go by herself… I just would feel better if she had someone, you know? She's been getting emotional a lot lately with me here… Dad's way too busy. Maybe Linda can be on standby if she's working at St. Vic's."

"Linda's back is still bad. Danny said she's out all this week."

"Terrific," he grimaced again and took a sharp breath as a deep throbbing pain crept up the middle of his leg and knifed directly through his lower back as his face went pale and he closed his eyes to ride through it even as the intensity notched up higher.

"Jamie…" Erin started with concern as she noticed. "Do I need to get someone?"

"Yeah... no wait, just have to…" he reached over and conceded by hitting the little red button and waiting for the relief it would bring before speaking again in a few minutes. "Sorry, I didn't want to while you were here, but… hurts..."

"Hey, no… don't worry, _I_ understand," she assured with a bit of self righteousness in her voice and convinced herself of the fact that he would have held off even longer if Eddie had been here. "Why don't we get you reclined back a little more so you can rest easier or do you want me to have them come and get you back in bed? Are you cold? Do you want another blanket or a pillow?"

"No, should s-stay here…" he replied slowly as the medication dulled the pain and his mind alike. "S-supposed to have... lunch soon... sitting up. Stay here," he repeated. "I'm 'kay now… it's gettin' better," he insisted. "Gotta eat and work on doin' this or can't come home."

"Jamie, I'm worried about you," his sister continued. "We all are."

"I'm 'kay... told you… 'nd you always worry 'bout me too much."

"No, you're not okay, and I do know _you_ … you're gonna push yourself to go home too early because you're worried about Eddie more than yourself. You can't do that this time, Jamie… this time it has to be more about what's best for you than her for a change… this week and afterwards too."

"For a change? What'r you sayin'?... S'all been 'bout me. Ed's here too much," he countered as one tired eye now blinked back while the other one was covered with two fingers digging into his forehead above his eyebrows trying to stave off an impending headache. "She's tired from work, comes t'see me... goes home to Kaylin… everythin's for me. I'm put'in her through hell."

"Jamie, I know that Eddie loves you with all her heart… I would never say different after watching the two of you together for the last year, but please admit that some of the stuff you've gone through is because she's been way over the top emotional and you know it, little brother," Erin chided but with definite underlying concern. "You get stressed out because she's upset and react badly to the anesthesia, then when you're trying to wake up she's got you in a panic attack which makes everything worse. It happened more than once hasn't it? What do you think she'll be like when you come home?"

"She's p'rgnant, Erin… s'posed to be 'motional. S'it s'my job... to be better… and get the ice cream," he tried to lighten, thankful that the modified dose of whatever he was receiving now at least let him remain somewhat connected if just a bit fuzzy.

"No, Jamie… she wants everything to be perfect again. She knows it's not, but she says she won't believe it until that's what she's told… said that first day you were up here," Erin insisted and she knew those words resonated with him, even if he was impaired. "I told her to be positive with you, and she said she won't accept anything but full function because you always bounce back from things like this and you'll do it again. She thinks you're going to go back on patrol and gets mad whenever anyone insinuates that might not be possible," she added softly knowing how much the truth hurt… probably more than the obvious physical pain he was in. "I'm just trying to be honest, Jamie," she added as she watched his expression fall although he was not surprised his sister would be the one to address it… the same thoughts had been there in the back of his worried mind whenever he was lucid enough. "Somebody has to put you first."

"And y'don't think Ed is?"

"I know she _wants_ to," Erin admitted thoughtfully since she could tell by the fact he hadn't gotten instantly red-lined defensive that this wasn't exactly a shock, and maybe something he needed to get off his chest too. "She tries, but with everything else that's happening… I don't think it's possible right now."

"Like me getting all way better?"

"Grandpa and I… Dad too by now I think… and Danny... Jamie, we all want that to be possible, but we know what you already know too. Pop said he saw it in your face when you were watching that hostage situation on the news. Even with help from an amazing staff and the latest high-tech medicine here…" she allowed her point to hang out there as she held her breath waiting for his response. "You need to consider other options."

"There's only so much can do… I know, 'Rin," he conceded softly in defeat, suddenly growing tired as his mind had enough of this acceptance business and sought to retreat once more. "She just… she needs to believe right now, 'kay? Maybe me too. We'll work on it…" he trailed off before deep, even breathing signaled an end to this conversation as he shut her out, intentional or not and left a sister worried once more that she had taken things too far.

###

"Hey, look it's effing sleeping beauty… all ninety pounds of her!" came a deep, crass voice that didn't register in Jamie's familiar catalog. At first he imagined it was Danny for whatever reason given the familiar contempt, but a quick blink open of the eyes revealed a looming mountain of a man that challenged his own father's stature standing outside his door instead… one that was likewise dressed in a robe and slippers, but didn't seem to be letting that bother him. "The hell?! Is that an EFFING HARVARD BLANKIE you got there, sweetheart? No wonder they've been hiding this girl out back here, Dave!" he thundered down the hall at his compatriot… the sound of which had Marguerite and William charging out of one of the supply rooms in the back at full press.

"He's a freaking ring knocker!" came the equally loud reply back. "I heard about him! The SEAL guys think he's cute! No wonder he gets special treatment and helicopter rides!"

"Corporals Daniels and Richards!" the nurse bristled at her two newest charges who had arrived on the wing for their own procedures while Jamie had slept through the afternoon… under the auspicious red fleece college blanket that Erin had carefully tucked around him before taking her leave he soon realized. "That will be enough! Back to your bed! You will not harass the other patients in my ward!" she asserted before another voice… one that was instantly recognizable broke in from behind.

"Hey, how about you guys take it back from where you came from? That's my brother in there!" Daniel Reagan snarled like a pit bull backing up a doberman as he stared up at the much larger Corporal with full intent when the man turned around. "Two tours in Fallujah in case you're wondering. Semper Fi."

"You're related to that ivy-league brat? They're taught to sell guys like us out for a headline!"

"And you should shut your face… you don't know anything about him! Or we could just take this outside, Nancy."

"NO, NO!" Marguerite inserted herself once more and pushed the two apart. "I will not have any of this! Beds, now!" she ordered before giving Jamie an apologetic look after the hallway emptied. "I'm sorry… Marines you know. They will be respectful to officers but it's in their nature to treat everyone under that less so unless you win their regard. William will be in to get you back in bed once we settle these two, we didn't want to wake you before… and don't worry I'll make sure they stay quiet. Once they have their procedures, they won't be so eager to roam and will probably be begging for painkillers like candy," she assured before stepping away to see to her responsibilities.

"Jesus, kid… what are you trying to do in here?" Danny softened until he walked in the room. "Why don't you just paint a freaking target on your back instead?!" he demanded with an incredulous look at the blanket with its evident emblem.

"Erin must have done that before she left. She brought it… was her idea," Jamie answered while shaking his head at his pair of diverse siblings as he managed to find the side control to sit up a bit. "Let me get this straight. You're ready to throw down with that knucklehead even though he agrees with everything you usually say about me?"

"Reagan family rule number one," Danny reminded. "Reagans can talk smack all night long. Outsiders talk smack, there's gonna be a fight."

"Way to have my back."

"Glad to help, and good to see you out of bed finally," his older brother added. "Dad said you were doing better," he encouraged while remaining mindful of that basic order to be positive he had received in no uncertain terms from his father.

"Yeah, and now you get to see if I can get back in it," Jamie groaned as William came around the corner with a few accessories. "He might need some help, m'not doin' so good at that today. Gotta finish before Ed gets here," he begged with a nervous eye to the time as he realized it was coming up on five o'clock and her usual arrival after shift so they could share dinner together. "I don't want her to watch."

"No worries, man," William assured as Danny quickly took his jacket off and jumped in ready to support his little brother on one side, relieved at last to be able to offer some tangible help after all this. "Once you get the hang of this in a couple of days, you'll be able to swing in and out like Tarzan."

"Ha, this reminds me of that time with you in the…" Danny started before being nearly silenced by a death stare. "Remember?"

"I know… closet… Mom… priest," Jamie summarized succinctly while he grabbed the overhead bar to the best of his one-handed ability and cut that duplicate walk down memory lane short as the return trip into bed was completed with less fanfare although Danny was disheartened to see the obvious discomfort any movement caused his brother and the sight of that bulky brace, both of which Jamie was obviously trying to downplay for his wife. "Can we take this off now?" he begged. "I think the swelling is making the rest of my leg numb… still can't feel my foot although the top part up towards my hip is pounding," he complained.

"Sorry, no can do," William advised. "Dr. Kenzie was up here earlier when you were sleeping… she said she'd stop back later to check it. Gotta keep everything immobilized for now until the therapist breaks the hinge when you get some range of motion in your knee, otherwise you'll lose the extension. I'll take it off for a bit when I come back later to get you ready for the night, okay? Dinner's soon, try not to dose before that if you can. You didn't get much lunch and we can't have you not eating," he warned.

"Yeah, okay… thanks," Jamie sighed as the nurse left, grateful though that everything had been accomplished swiftly as judging from the pair of catcall whistles emanating from the hall his wife had just arrived.

"Geez, what nice neighbors you've got now," Eddie acknowledged as she appeared at the doorway with a frown since she knew her husband's first urge would have been to jump up to defend her honor if he was able. "Makes me miss Quincy… although he kept hounding me for Annabel's number. Aw… did I get here too late?" she asked while stepping in and noticing the blanket draped to the side. "Were you already in the chair? I wanted to be able to see what you have to do so I know I have everything set up right at home. They're supposed to deliver all this and the bed Wednesday while I have the day off to go to the doctor and the ramp people are coming in the afternoon."

"It's not rocket science, Ed," Jamie groaned. "And please take that blanket home before it gets me bushwhacked in the middle of the night," he sighed.

"I'll explain later," Danny assured before folding it up and putting it neatly away on the window seat out of sight. "His new roomies aren't exactly fans," he explained when her look said in no uncertain terms to spit it out.

"Well they better not mess with him!" Eddie replied loudly enough as she stepped back to the doorway so that the entire hall was well aware of her position on that matter. "Hey, you two newbies… you listen to me! You want a piece of my husband, you got to go through me first!"

"Oh, come on, Ed, that is so not gonna help," Jamie sighed and blushed with embarrassment at his wife's defense, certain now he was going to pay for that at some point during his stay here unless Marguerite made good on her pledge to chemically restrain his new wardmates. "Can we just move on? How was your day, dears?" he mocked in his best Julia Roberts voice from _Pretty Women,_ bringing a tinge of red to Danny's face as well as he recalled covering his little brother's eyes for that rather explicit implied nudity scene in his favorite movie where the VHS tape had literally been worn through by constant rewinding. Had Jackie been a redhead… he mused before those impure thoughts were thankfully interrupted.

"I broke a nail answering six hundred and nineteen phone calls," Eddie exaggerated with a grump, although completely relieved at just how much better Jamie was looking today despite the added pain from the block wearing off. She had been fidgeting with nerves over that all day at her desk and this now gave her hope that a homecoming for Christmas was possible. "Twelfth precinct, Officer Reagan speaking. How may I direct your call?"

"I solved my body dump case from last night," Danny admitted while leaving out all implicit details like the location and the fact the victim's name mirrored their own brother's. "Well, my partner did anyway," he added truthfully. "Drug dealer… his supplier apparently had it in for him," he shrugged with that completely benign explanation to what at first presented as one of those Templar coincidences. Maybe Jackie had been right about that too, he pondered. Further nosing around revealed that Detective Altemose from the 2-7 who shared Lydia Gonsalves' badge number also lived on Staten Island, not two miles away from his own house and could have very well just heaved that out the window as a protest to the investigation which saw him brought up on charges and lose his pension. Suddenly this whole Templar resurgence case was falling apart at the seams, he thought to himself and there had been no time to review any more of those videos. That just left the cat and the car… seemingly unrelated and not much else. "Maria had the case all tied up in a bow for Carver by the time I got into work this morning," he admitted. "Even managed to get her to give us Wednesday off so she could finish baking her cookies."

"Oh, so you both have Wednesday off," Jamie's gaze sharpened. "Danny, can I ask you a favor?" he started.

"Sure, kid. Anything."

"Anything?" Jamie repeated just as Eddie caught on, knowing how much her husband was completely against her going to that doctor's appointment alone.

"Reagan, no… please, we talked about this," she warned, frankly weirded out by the notion of her brother-in-law accompanying her to an OBGYN's office… that just seemed so wrong on so many levels. "I told you I can go alone."

"Eddie has to see Dr. Geisner at St. Vic's for an ultrasound at two o'clock," Jamie continued on a forward track, anyway. "I can be on speaker phone, but nothing else. Listen, we didn't bring anything up because of all this…" he frowned with a look down at his leg. "And I would never ask otherwise because of Linda..." he admitted before trailing off.

"You knew about that?" Danny reasoned as he looked down and chewed his lip with regret considering his wife's wish it remain private. Not that anything in the Reagan family ever was. "Dad?"

"Kinda guessed… he just confirmed… Grandpa's interrogation techniques," Jamie admitted sheepishly. "Don't know the details… and don't have to," he offered hurriedly. "I know that's really personal stuff and not our business either way, but we were kind of doing the same thing," he admitted and took Eddie's hand which was now shaking as hearing all of this announced out loud broke her resolve and made it all too real again. "The part about not being completely honest," he continued. "The day before I left for Washington, we… um, well, we found out the baby might have some issues," he revealed while Danny's eyes stayed steady for a second before dropping down… a classic tell of guilt. "Wait, you knew too, didn't you?"

"Yeah," his older brother admitted. "They said something that first night after the meeting here when we were on the phone… Gramps, Erin and Dad already knew by then, so I put it together. I mean not the details or anything like you said… and I didn't tell Linda or the boys because we were all wrapped up with her back issues," he admitted without coming totally clean on that either. "Erin just said it was probably nothing but the doc was watching something."

"Well, then just about everyone knows anyway… even Marguerite," Jamie defended as Eddie was shaking her head. "There's no point in trying to hide it anymore. So it might be nothing," he turned back to his brother to explain. "But one of the kidneys is bigger than it should be and it's something they see in like one out of every hundred babies born, but they're able to check closer now that we're further along to see if there's more involved or just how bad… or if it's anything to worry about at all," he encouraged instead. "I just don't want Eddie to be there alone and everyone… I mean _everyone_ else is busy."

"Damn, I'm sorry guys, but what exactly do you want me to do at the lady doctor?" Danny edged, equally mortified with the thought of escorting his sister-in-law to… well, he couldn't even bring himself to say the words _._ "I mean I can't go in _there_ with her," he clarified. Christ, just the thought of doing that with Linda again gave him the heebie-jeebies and night sweats.

"Not in _there,_ in there," Jamie insisted with a roll of his eyes. "Just stay in the waiting room or even the parking lot, for God's sake! I just don't want her to have to drive home alone if she's upset!"

"Oh," Danny sat back as he considered a more reasonable request. "I guess I can… I mean if it's okay with Eddie… I can do that," he conceded and forced the words out much to his own dismay.

"Ed?" Jamie prodded, and she knew there was no other way around this to ease his mind.

"If it makes you happy, dear," she drawled out painfully with an apologetic grimace directed at Danny.

"Perfect, it's a date," Jamie concluded with a sigh of relief. Actually it was far from it, but at least it was a start he thought as he prayed once more that it turned out there was no need for any of this in the first place even while plotting his own solo doctor discussion regarding the outlook for things to come since maybe his sister was right, Eddie wasn't capable of accepting anything less than perfect just now.

* * *

 _Lots of stuff happening over the course of these upcoming chapters now as some of the major storylines in this one intersect in surprising ways after months of buildup in the "werks" whew! You can all thank (or blame, ha! No please don't do that!) lawslave for some of this detail as she has a knack for pointing out interesting little subplots which I then feel compelled to include! Also, while I'm at it, I'd like to give a huge shout out to jlmayer for being a sounding board for some of the military issues included. As for what's next (thanks for asking, Anne Educator!), I have started a new standalone story about Betty and Henry, our two favorite greyhairs, that sort of segues between the end of this one and the epilogue that will follow as Series II wraps up._

 _Next, Jamie has an upfront discussion with Dr. Kenzie and a third party we haven't heard from in a while as he seeks an unbiased viewpoint to base a major decision on, which will only serve to make Eddie feel like even her husband sees the need to keep her out of the loop until the two have a moment to come together as a team again._


	55. Chapter 55

Chapter 55

"Dr. Kenzie, you have a visitor," Janet announced the next morning in a warning tone that belied a smug smile as she waved said guest up the hallway quickly, particularly since he had managed to talk his way into the building and skirt security downstairs more than an hour before normal visiting hours by dropping a few names, including one that started with a K.

"Okay, just buzz Mr. Wendell in; he knows where to find me," Kenzie replied while offering a frustrated frown without looking up from the computer screen as she assumed her investor was popping in for an early morning update on her most recent surgeries including the two new cases yesterday while she reviewed the latest lab results from one particular patient. "No, damn it!" she cursed with a heavy sigh and then paused to rub her face with both hands as she racked her mind for a solution that was not forthcoming… a notion which was professionally and personally completely devastating.

"Ooh, I know that look… that means a Birkenstock's about to hit the ceiling fan, or a computer screen," Rick Fellows teased lightly from the doorway, but with underlying concern as he had been summoned here this morning for a particular reason which he now hoped didn't coincide with her current state. "Something wrong, Kenz?" he prodded as he stood there with her favorite breakfast in his hands. "Anything some Khaoniew Moo Ping can fix? I mean I'm not usually one for sticky rice and marinated sweet sauce at this hour, but you always claimed it was the perfect blend of protein and carbs to start the day so I schlepped all the way here from Midtown and dodged security downstairs to bring it to you while it was still hot; here you go… you're welcome," he informed with a shake of the bag.

"What are you really doing here, Fellows?" she asked with an involuntary smile despite this major setback as she tipped back in her chair and looked up, pausing to pull that signature ponytail a little tighter and tuck some loose tendrils behind her ears as her hands slipped behind her head and she wondered just how much of a mess it looked.

"I come bearing gifts like these, and you were expecting someone else?" he teased. "C'mon Kenz, I mean I always make good on my obligations… eventually."

"Since when?"

"Since now," he answered as he stepped in and put the food and a couple of large hot green teas down on the desk. "Sorry for standing you up earlier this week. Had to pull some doubles. We had a couple of guys get hurt falling off an icy ladder in the middle of that storm mess and everyone had to fill shifts. Now what was that look for when I came in? Not Reagan I hope."

"You know I couldn't say even if it was," she chided softly. "But it's not."

"Bad result for your study?" he prodded, anyway.

"Let's just say it's not happy news for someone and leave it at that," she deflected as that part of the conversation was closed. Dr. Charlotte MacKenzie hated to admit defeat and often took it far too personally, but some of that inevitably came with her chosen profession and in this case circumstances from botched earlier diagnoses and treatments had likely paved the way to this particular failure.

"Okay," he agreed and pulled a chair over to sit down opposite of her, marveling in the fact that in spite of the circumstances and the long hours she had obviously committed to her project over the last week that she could still look so damn radiant in a set of unflattering slept-in surgical scrubs and old sandals. While it was true he had been stuck at the firehouse all week that didn't mean his mind hadn't often wandered up here and wondered how this redheaded firecracker was doing. "But I could probably help. At times like these it's important to remember that CPA's have an IQ that's an average of five points higher than MD's… imagine where firemen rate. Gotta be off the charts," he kidded as he distributed their breakfast and paused to add one half a package of honey to her tea before handing it over. "Just the way you like it."

"So you always claimed while you stole the rest for your cup," she smiled before digging into the Moo Ping. "Mm, this is actually really good!" she exclaimed. "Not to look a gift horse in the mouth… particularly one that rides in with you, but what gives?" she demanded. "You didn't just schlep here like you claimed to pay off a debt by bringing me food to eat at a desk… and just so you know, given your boy's propensity for causing the whole staff grief here, this doesn't even cover last week's interest."

"Oh, I was afraid of that… Reagan tends to be a troublemaker. Got a call from him last night though," he admitted as her eyes darted up and she stopped chewing. "Asked if I could stop by… wanted to talk so since I'm technically not immediate family I needed an excuse to get in. All I had to say was Thai delivery for Doc Kenzie and they waved me up," he smirked.

"Damn, already? He works fast considering yesterday was the first time he was upright. Is this the talk me off the ledge talk or put all the cards on the table?"

"Reagan likes to know what he's been dealt," Rick answered truthfully. "Lay it out straight for him."

"And he wants to do this without his wife I take it, interesting," Kenzie mused before gathering up her takeout container and cup. "C'mon, let's take this down the hall then," she advised as Rick did likewise and followed her to Jamie's room. "Knock, knock," she announced before walking in and finding her patient sitting up and twiddling with the scrambled eggs on his own tray. "Those taste so much better on a fork then pumped through your nose in a little tube," she warned as he had been put on notice that skipping meals would no longer be tolerated. "See? I told you Rick, nothing but bother with this one. You're gonna owe me your entire pension in luk chup!"

"What's that?" Jamie puzzled as his curiosity was piqued. "And I thought Eddie was bad with her ice cream. Hey, man… thanks for coming," he acknowledged as Rick walked over for a handshake.

"Fake little Asian fruits that she… no, on second thought, don't ask," his buddy answered with a smirk. "Outta my budget. You're looking better than the last time I saw you," he encouraged.

"So what's up, Jamie?" Kenzie asked in her upfront manner as she sat down and propped her sandaled feet up on the bed, crossing them informally in the way she liked to relate to her patients. "Don't think I'm not grateful to you for making this one actually show his face around here again with food for me no less, but I'm guessing there's probably more to it than getting your kicks playing matchmaker some more. You looking for an excuse to quit? 'Cause I don't give those out here," she added evenly with a directed stare as she jumped right in.

"Not looking for a reason to give up, but I need to know what I'm going against," he answered just as honestly. "More like the place I gotta set my sights. I have a family, another baby on the way… I can't be chasing one thing while I should be looking at something else."

"Fair enough," Kenzie answered as she took him at his word. "What do you want from me?"

"I wanna see it," Jamie confessed. "All of it. I'm always tranqued for that part when they change the dressings. I want to see the x-rays… all of them too. No one showed me… I don't remember what it looked like right after."

"That's probably for good reason, bud," Rick sympathized. "But I was there in the street and remember enough. You might want to take my word on it that having those pictures in your head… especially _your_ head where they don't come out… might not be the best thing for you."

"Okay, maybe not… but what's down there now. I gotta know. Best case, worst case."

"Alright, you want me to be straight with you, I ask the same. You wanted Rick to be here for this, and not your family… your wife," Kenzie noted. "Why? They've been completely involved in making decisions for you since this happened."

"That's why," Jamie replied while nervously chewing on his lip. "I need an outside voice. Eddie, my dad… I know that they've done everything they believed was best for me so far. I don't want them to think otherwise, especially her if it doesn't all turn out the way we hope. She already feels too much guilt over the decisions she's made… the ones I put on her and that's not fair. What happens from here on out is on me and I need to know what I'm up against."

"Okay," Kenzie nodded, having assured herself that her patient had his head on straight. "I can respect that. You want the worst case or pie in the sky scenario first?"

"Let's start at the bottom and work our way up."

"The very worst?" Kenzie started candidly. "You get a serious septic infection, embolism, stroke, respiratory or cardiac problems and die or wind up in a vegetative state. I'll add pneumonia and an acute internal bleed we can't control from your spleen injury to the list just above that."

"Go on," Jamie urged without flinching as he kept his gaze on her.

"Bone infection, nonunion, malunion, compromised bone too weak to hold below the break so the nail and holding screw let go and end up in knee joint when you bear weight on it again. Irreversible nerve damage. Then you'll have another decision to make."

"Best case assuming the goal is to end up somewhere between that level and closer to 'Oh, hey, Sergeant Reagan… remember that time you got bumped by a car and had to take a couple months off?'"

"Just that. Some scars… those are inevitable, but we'll try to minimize with a little plastic surgery if necessary when you're closer to healed. The bone matrix does its job and encourages your femur basically to regenerate that missing section before it biodegrades and leaves you with a whole bone identical to what you had before… what happened to the muscles, ligaments and tendons around your knee will have to be assessed after your rehab is under way. Right now there are three major concerns… no make that four. We need to protect you from infection, number one. Then ensure the stability of the repair by keeping you non-weight bearing for now, which sucks I know… while we hope that the vascular and nerve repairs we've done are enough because there's nothing left to pull out of the hat there."

"What's bothering you the most, Reagan?" Rick interjected. "You look like you have doubts on what the doc just told you. She's straight up, trust me."

"Not sure I'll get that far; still can't feel anything below my knee," Jamie reported tightly which had frankly been the thing that worried him most and driven him to this point while it kept him up for hours overnight in a cold sweat as he prayed for something to change. "The block should have worn off by now, right? I can't move anything! Nothing's come back yet, so that means the nerves are damaged… forever?"

"There's still a significant amount of swelling, Jamie," Kenzie answered carefully. "You were asleep yesterday when I did my rounds through here and I finished late in the OR so I pushed it off. We'll do some testing on that today, but expect that with the grafts you had we'll need to wait for a while since the nerves take longer to regenerate… up to two years, although of course the sooner we see improvement the better."

"Two years… I… what if it comes down to that and needing to do something else?…" he trailed off with a heavy swallow as that now-familiar tightness in his chest was building up and he sought to control it before it welled up into sight. This was the thing he most feared saying in front of Eddie… to admit that he might have been better off with the other option and the impetus behind this private meeting. "I mean if I want to be like Quincy instead…"

There, he said it.

"We'll do what needs to be done," Kenzie assured quietly. "A lot of doctors balk at that, but my goal for you is pie in the sky, and barring that I will do anything in my power to see that you walk and can enjoy your life and your family to the fullest extent however that has to come. I will do my part if you promise to do yours… and that's the hard truth and the best I can give you. Deal?"

"What else, Reagan?" Rick encouraged as he could sense his friend still needed more and was not done yet. "Get it all off your chest, bud. Cards on the table."

"What about being a cop?" Jamie continued as the last question seemed so obvious, but for whatever reason he needed an answer to be stated out loud here too so he could start processing it. "Pie in the sky… even with the way things stand right now, is there any chance? Ed still thinks, I mean maybe she's just too scared to bring it up to me because she's afraid I'm the one that can't accept… I know she will if she has to, but we have to talk about it sometime when she can hear me."

"I will not tell you that's impossible, until I know it's the case," Kenzie admitted. "Unlikely though, but look at Fellows here… by all regards he should have been reduced to sitting in a rocking chair long ago with the things he's done to himself, and he's still out there crawling into holes pulling people like you out of them."

"Yeah, about that," Rick advised from experience. "Just because you might be able to when you get that far, Reagan… and I'm not even gonna doubt that you can because I've seen the stuff you've brought yourself through before… but remember that I'm mid-forty and an old man already looking at retirement because I've worn my parts out. Just because you can, doesn't mean you should. I'm just sayin' that because you've got a lot of gifts… and chasin' a perp down some steps and wrecking everything you're about to accomplish… 'cause I know you will, don't for a _second_ past this think otherwise… it ain't worth it in the end when you wind up teaching instead of doing anyway, and you got kids and a wife to enjoy for a long time. Understand?"

"Yeah," Jamie breathed as he sank back a little and took that inside, grateful for the unvarnished words that had him feeling as if he was just a bit more in control of himself now no matter what the outcome was. "I hear you… now I need to see it," he insisted while bracing himself for the fact that the second part of this would be no easier to face than the first… and as it would turn out, actually much harder.

"Okay, let me get some supplies, and we'll get started," Kenzie agreed. " _After_ you finish your eggs," she added with a shake of her head on the way out.

###

"Nurse Simpson! Where is Dr. MacKenzie?! She's not in her office!" Oliver Wendell barked as he stalked through the hall looking for updates just as Kenzie had suspected he would.

"It's Simmons, and I believe she's in with a patient right now," Marguerite answered from her station with a nod towards Jamie's room where the blinds had been drawn for privacy as each detail of his current physical state was being painstakingly revealed and tended to by the doctor herself with Rick in attendance this morning.

"Reagan?" Wendell bellowed. "Isn't he post-surgical? Has there been a complication?"

"No, sir. Not that I am aware of," she answered with an eye to the unit doorway where Eddie had surprisingly just appeared, listening wide-eyed to the goings on in the hall after having become the victim of one of Sergeant Dexter's little last minute shift changes he was so well known for inflicting on the women officers. "I believe he's just having his dressings changed, and she's completing some testing," she tried to assure them both at the same time.

"Isn't patient care on this ward what you're hired to do?" the little arrogant man with the odd mustache continued to insist. "Unless there's a problem she should be working on that status report we need to submit to the FDA by the end of the week! Each day our approval is pushed off will cost me hundreds of thousands of dollars! I want to know why one of the subjects has been removed from the study!" he demanded. "Every dollar counts, and I won't get that patent unless we show this is working!" he hissed.

"I'm sorry, sir, I'm afraid I'm not privy to any of that," Marguerite answered carefully as this volatile investor had been known to come in and try to control the staffing as well, though so far Kenzie had been successful at quelling any of the tantrums directed at them. "Dr. MacKenzie had already started in there before I arrived on shift. I'm sure she will be with you shortly if you'll just have a seat down in the office."

"I don't have time to waste waiting around… tell her I'll be back later!" he insisted, instead turning to rush past Eddie without so much as an acknowledgement of her presence and she had the instant feeling that he would have walked right over her leaving imprints with his tiny little feet in his wake had she not stepped out of the way.

"I'm sorry, dear," Marguerite attempted to explain as Eddie's shocked eyes locked back on her. "He is rather high strung at times; seems to have a touch of Napoleon complex… those men of short stature, you know," she fluffed with the obvious term describing a theorized condition occurring in people such as Wendell characterized by overcompensating with aggressive or domineering social behaviors.

"You think?" Eddie huffed as she finally found her voice before her focus instantly turned back to her own worries. "Nothing's wrong with Jamie, is there? He's not the one that got kicked out? Isn't this when he's supposed to be having PT?" she added while noting Aaron's presence in one of the other Marine's rooms instead.

"I don't believe so," Marguerite added. "Janet just informed me that Dr. Kenzie was in with him and not to be disturbed. Have a seat, dear. She's probably just running some of the nerve tests that were scheduled yesterday after lunch and had to be pushed off when she went into surgery. I'm sure it's nothing more than that. We weren't expecting you here this morning."

"Oh, well, I have one of those Napoleon types at work too," Eddie sighed as she accepted that benign explanation at first. "My desk sergeant switched my shift to second today even though he's not supposed to do that since I'm on modified and then said it's my fault I showed up because I didn't check the duty roster. So now I have to miss my daughter's soccer practice tonight," she sighed. "I was already out and closer to here, so I came early..." she trailed off as the door opened and Kenzie emerged pulling her gloves off.

"Marguerite, where did Oliver go?" she demanded in annoyance. "He can't be out here yelling things about the study down the hall and disturbing the patients when I'm in with them... oh, Mrs. Reagan," she added with surprise… and was that a hint of guilt after spotting her? "I didn't realize you were here. I apologize for Mr. Wendell's outburst. He is a man with a singular focus," she explained. "Jamie just had his dressings changed and a touch of some short-acting tranquilizer to make him more comfortable while we were manipulating his leg to rewrap everything. He'll be coming out of it momentarily. If you could please ask your sister-in-law, Linda, to be present on Thursday or Friday this week in the morning I'll have one of the nurses walk her through what's necessary."

"We?" Eddie puzzled for a second as a glance through the doorway revealed that Rick was still sitting at Jamie's bedside and she was too dumbstruck to inquire further as to what this was all about. "Sure, uh… I'll call her later and see what day works best for her."

"Thank you," Kenzie replied. "I'll be in my office," she added with a knowing glance at Marguerite as she deliberately cut her presence short. "Point the nuclear warhead back at my door when he circles around again, please."

"Yes, ma'am," the nurse answered and watched with a bit of her own concern at these unusual circumstances as Eddie made her way over to her husband's room.

"Rick?" she inquired as he had his back to her before immediately standing up and turning around to greet her. "What are you doing here?… Sorry, I mean that didn't sound right," she flustered trying to understand why he would be present with Kenzie behind closed doors, or drapes, so to speak. "I mean I'm glad you could come. Jamie was wondering when he would be able to see you again."

"No problem," he smiled back and did his best to assure her his presence was merely coincidental. "Was stuck on call at the house all week so this was the first chance I had to get up here. Sort of talked my way in the back door to see how he was doing, hope you don't mind," he added just before noticing that Jamie's eyes were starting to flutter as he came to. "Hey, Reagan… good to see you back again! Look, Eddie's _here_ already," he warned with emphasis hoping that his friend would focus and be able to rein in whatever he needed to first since seeing the full extent off all the damage the car had left in its wake had been somewhat overwhelming overtop of the rest of their conversation, and it had left his buddy thoroughly shaken and perhaps regretting having made that request in the first place.

"Ed's here… 'kay, thanks," Jamie acknowledged as he struggled to shake off the fast-acting drugs which had become a staple of his morning routine… for good cause, apparently. "M'm back," he announced.

"Great to hear," Rick enthused. "Listen, I'm gonna get rolling since you have company and I need to see if my place is still there in one piece after being gone all week. I'll check in on you as soon as I can though and you call me again if there's anything you need, okay? Good to see you're coming around," he encouraged. "Next time I want you up in a chair. I got some committee stuff to run by you and that Garrett guy is making me nuts with all the emails and texts he throws out. He's really gung-ho on this now."

"'Kay, thanks for comin'," Jamie acknowledged as Rick gripped his hand before offering Eddie a hug and taking his leave. "W-what'r you doin' here?" he asked with a puzzled glance at his wife. "It's early, right?"

"Don't worry, it's nothing. Dexter just messed with the schedule and said I agreed to switch with Winters for second when I didn't 'cause he scored tickets to the Islander's game tonight," she sighed. "It's not even worth getting worked up over," she assured.

"I am so gonna get that guy if I have to crawl down to the 12th to do it," Jamie mumbled with a roll of his eyes in annoyance that his wife was still being treated in that manner and he had no way to address it.

"So, what was going on in here?" Eddie demanded with a certain feeling now that she had walked in on something she wasn't supposed to see. A glance around at his bed showed nothing seemingly out of the ordinary though as he was once again situated with his brace lying to the side and apparently all set up and waiting for his morning PT session.

"Nothing," he replied with an empty disappointment and a fallen look that could not be disguised, especially from her.

"Jamie, do I constantly have to remind you what a terrible poker face you have?" she demanded with a bit more temper than intended after the fallout with Erin left her raw about being deceived. "Please don't freeze me out on this too!"

"Too?" he puzzled with a sharp look as despite his resolve to keep this from her some of the pent up grief and shock at what he had just seen started to seep out in a cluster of unfocused emotions. "What's _that_ supposed to mean?!"

"It's just that Rick was here… he told you to call him _again,"_ she reported as she skirted the issue with the papers now that those detective skills were rolling full force. "Kenzie was in doing the nurse's job and all of you were surprised to see me!" she pointed out sharply. "Jamie, what's going on? What are you hiding?"

"I'm s-sorry," he managed to stutter out between tight breaths after staring back blankly at her for several moments. "I asked them… just had to hear… and look for myself…" he admitted before closing eyes as she could see he was fighting back more anxiety and her heart clenched; not again… this cycle had to stop. "I was afraid for you to see how bad it is because you told them to... do it… Ed, I can't feel anything down there… and it's… it's really bad," he gasped out.

"Oh, lambchop… you saw?… Oh, God… why did you want to do that without me?" Eddie lowered her voice and quickly crawled on the bed aside of him and wrapped her arms around. "Shh… just talk to me and breathe. I'm not mad, please… I promise. I'm sorry for raising my voice. I just want to understand so I can help."

"I… I don't know why," he admitted shakily as some of it crumbled and broke out. "I… I feel like… like I'm never gonna… like I'm not the same… person… the same husband… or cop… and if you see…"

"If I see what's happened or watch you struggling that I'm gonna think that too or feel guilty for making those choices for you?" she finished for him as a major piece clicked into place. This wasn't about his trust in her at all… not really. This was about him worrying about her feelings and trying to protect her while facing what happened with a staggering fear that he'd never be able to take care of her or the rest of his family as he always prided himself on… so much of the sum total of the way he valued his own life. "Oh, Jamie, I may never be sure I did the right thing, but no matter what happens I will also never see you as anything less than the man I fell in love with and the father you are and always will be to Kaylin and our munchie. You'll see that too, I promise," she tried to assure as she kissed the side of his head and felt him continue to shake with that pinpointed fear… surely that part of him had been damaged beyond even what had been done physically.

"M'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that… I don't know why it scares me so much. This isn't because of you..."

"No, you don't have anything to be sorry for. I understand, baby, I really do. I've been a real mess through this too and all of it's been a shock to both of us and there's so much more than your leg that needs to heal, but we're going to start to do that together, okay? You, me, Kaylin and our baby first. You'll see when you get home and can start doing things for yourself. You are every bit the father and husband you've always been. I want you to promise me something though."

"What?"

"That you _will_ talk to someone else like Rick or your Dad about anything you're not comfortable saying to me if you need to, but don't hide that anymore. I'm gonna try not to obsess over every detail like I've been… it's just not me, that's your job… remember?" she sniffed with a small smile. "Mixing that up doesn't seem to work for us, and none of this will go away overnight. We'll go slow and every day we'll work on making something just a little better so we don't stress each other out, alright? You don't have to show me everything at once. Today, I just want you to be okay with me staying here and watching part of your therapy so I know how to help you in and out of bed… I know, no lifting," she stopped him with a hand up before he could remind her. "We'll figure this out, Jamison Reagan… how to accept help and do what needs to be done. I will always love you no matter what… I mean I must, I agreed to take your brother with me to the 'lady doctor' to make you feel better," she lightened with air quotes and a smile. "That's gotta count for something big, right? How about you start by promising to check with me on stuff like that first from now on?"

"Yeah, I can do that for you, Edit Katalin," he sighed as a tiny bit of weight lifted and he melted into her soft touch. "And I love you even more."

* * *

 _So Jamie and Eddie are both obviously going to struggle through this more than just physically as our lovebirds try to reconnect. Next, he might just get a boost from a pair of SEALs who think he's "cute" while Eva has her own run in with an old "friend" as the plaid man, Mason Malevsky, continues to pest with another housecall, and Eddie finds herself making a pact with a reluctant escort to the "lady doctor" with heartbreaking results. **Spoiler Alert** a few long, intense chapters ahead!_


	56. Chapter 56

Chapter 56

"Hey, look… it's Michael effing Jordan! How's the jump shot?"

"Nah, he's a SEAL… he probably bops it in the basket with his cute little whiskered nose!" came the pair of now familiar caustic voices with accompanying barking noises from outside of Jamie's room as he sat in his hard fought for recliner and rolled his eyes at their gall.

"What jackasses," he muttered to himself as he pushed up straighter in case company was coming anyway, having spent a lonely afternoon quietly contemplating things since Eddie had left to get some grocery shopping done in her downtime before heading back to the 12th for second shift. Tomorrow would be another one of those days he feared, having convinced her to stay home in the morning and rest before her exam with Dr. Geisner so that they could talk through it and about what they both hoped were positive results later that evening together.

"Hey, Ice… you're up. Think fast man," Quincy's voice appeared around the corner and suddenly there was a basketball being lobbed at his head that Jamie reflexively caught with one hand. "Nice! Layin' off the juice I see. You were sleepin' for like days after that last chop shop… you didn't look too good, bud, had me worried. Not as easy for me to get in and visit you now, but the Doc gave me and Rigs a pass to come over here this afternoon. She was in talkin' to him for a long time before and he asked to see you. Up for a game of Firing Squad yet?"

"Firing Squad?"

"Kinda like Around the World, but no taking turns or waiting… guys like us don't have the patience. Gotta stay in shape for my b-ball team, man. There's a profession league comin' out next year for wheelchair basketball and I got tryouts to train for. No one else here has any game," he lamented. "The gym is dead downstairs."

"You're serious, aren't you?" Jamie asked with his first genuine smile of the day as he tossed the ball back and Quincy put it on his lap before wheeling all the way through the doorway. "Maybe later. Don't think Marguerite will spring me and no wheels," he sighed. "Only day two out of bed and sitting up… doesn't that bug you?" he questioned as laughter from the other two rooms followed him in along with references to deserts and easy bake ovens.

"Who them? Nah… I ain't got time for their negativity, but I'm gonna take you on your honor about that game," Quincy answered before offering a word of advice, one of many over the next months as it turned out. "I'm battle proofed. If the gangbangers standing outside my Gram's door when I was a kid couldn't get a rise out of me, these clowns won't now. You have to be confident in yourself and your actions no matter what the situation is or they'll take you down as sure as look at you… you're a cop, you know how it is."

"Yeah, I did," Jamie sighed as the sound of the door buzzing again signaled another entry into their hall and the raucous voices of his Marine mates suddenly went silent.

"Course if that don't work, it never hurts to be friends with a dude like him," Quincy smirked as that entrance announced Rigsby's arrival, a man who no one dared laugh at, and Jamie instantly flashed back to the last conversation he could remember between the three of them late one night just before his most recent surgery and his chair buddy's departure from this ward.

 _"We gotta give him a nickname before I go," Quincy had insisted while Commander Rigsby sat back and observed, quiet at first, but secretly pleased that his plan to pair these two together was taking shape so well. Kenzie had managed to pull patients in for her study from a variety of sources, but of the ten or so men currently assembled on the floor he and his former protégée were the only two out of the Navy ranks so there was no one else to look to but this complete outsider. "Otherwise he's the only one in here wearin' a different uniform. He'll be a sittin' duck unless they know he's with us. You know how the damn Marines will treat him… like dirt or worse."_

 _"What is this? High school?" Jamie had laughed at this odd pair of bonded men who had for whatever reason insisted on inserting themselves into his life. "You're either with us, or against us? I'm friends with Rick Fellows, and he was a Marine… so was my brother, father and grandfather. Doesn't that count for something?"_

 _"Um… no. C'mon… you cops don't have cliques inside?" Quince had asked. "Does it matter to anyone else what your family was if they don't know them? Every part of what we do is wrapped up in an us versus them mentality… a band of brothers against the outside world."_

 _"You do know what my last name is, right?" Jamie argued. "That's all that matters to everyone else in the NYPD. Besides, it's usually us against the smoke eaters, and we just go by the color of the uniform there."_

 _"Okay, bad example," Quincy had conceded. "But take my word about the rest."_

 _"He's right," Rigsby's deep voice resounded as he had finally allowed himself to be drawn into the conversation, remaining a bit of a mystery as all Quincy had revealed thus far was that this had once been one of his toughest SEAL instructors. Tall in stature, with a nearly bald head now the older man had a very intense set of green eyes accentuated by his customary set of neatly pressed dark blue trimmed and emblemed pajamas and a left arm that was always completely strapped down and immobilized against them. "It's a point of respect. Men have a desire to feel that their group is tighter and better than other groups in the same category. Even if an outsider knows what a group member's nickname is, he also knows he dare not use it to address him without causing offense… that privilege is reserved for his comrades. It makes you distinctly one of us."_

 _"I've already got one then," Jamie had offered, a little confused about this acceptance from a pair of strangers, particularly when his own brother has been so adamant about excluding him from this side of his military life, but willing to play along out of abject loneliness and downright fear of the unknown at this point since these two seemed to have insights they were willing to share. "Everyone calls me Harvard because that's where I went to law school. Just use that."_

 _"Yeah, that's so not gonna work in this world, mister ivy-league dude," Quincy had replied with a disbelieving shake of his head and a 'what are we going to do with him' look at Rigs. "That one definitely puts you in the 'them' category and gets you bushwhacked in your sleep. So will something like Legal Eagle, 'sides, Commander here has a rule… everyone in his unit has to have a name that tells about what you're 'fraid of so we all know and you can't hide it, and unless that was books or cute library chicks, you gotta pick somethin' else."_

 _"So what's yours?"_

 _"Yeah, Cupcake, explain that one," Rigs had ordered with just a hint of amusement in his voice._

 _"Cupcake? Seriously? That's what a badass SEAL is afraid of?" Jamie laughed. "What? Is it the sprinkles or the icing, man? 'Cause that stuff can be deadly."_

 _"Shut up, and I'm not afraid of them," Quincy insisted before heaving a sigh and explaining as he'd had to do a hundred times before… the obvious point of the exercise. "I grew up in Hell's Kitchen here in the city with my Grandma. She liked to bake to make extra money and had it in her head she'd keep me outta the gangs by having me help her after school every day… actually got me a full-ride scholarship to Hudson University's Gourmet Pastry Institute by the time I was at the end of high school, but you do the math… skinny black kid dodging bangers that wanted to jump me every time I walked out the door. I'd be dead already if they knew I was gonna be a pastry chef, so I told them I had to stay clean because I was enlisting and hit the weight room instead to hold my own there until I could get out. In the end that's what I did."_

 _"Sometimes he's still afraid to admit he likes baking those cupcakes," Rigsby added with a smirk. "He gets this leg straightened out, and I made sure that scholarship is still waiting for him. We could be looking at the next Cake Boss here. Now, how about you, Reagan? Name three things that scared you this last year."_

 _"You mean aside from being a hood ornament?" Jamie huffed as he stated the obvious and sadly took in the condition of his leg. "Last summer I jumped off a bridge to repel down for a kid trapped in a car even though I'm scared shitless of heights… did it for an RT I was dating at first, but that worked out because I adopted the little girl and she's my daughter now, and then I wound up basically dying from hypothermia under a beam in a collapsed basement last winter before Rick Fellows got me out and the docs brought me back a half hour later," he admitted. "That was worse. The cold… it took me and saved me all at the same time."_

 _"So that's why they've got you under this?" Rigs asked as he eyed the thermostat-controlled warming blanket Billie Swanson had ordered for Jamie pre-op to keep his temp up prior to surgery this time._

 _"Yeah, I had issues the other day when they did my hip… got too cold in the middle of it for some reason and gave them a scare so they're pre-baking me before tomorrow. I hate being like that now, guess I'm more prone to it… my wife, she's pregnant and sleeps with the window open."_

 _"So how about Iceman?" Quincy had chirped in. "He could be like that cocky good-looking blond dude from the movie... Val Kilmer, right? One of only a few United States Naval Aviators to be sent to TOPGUN," he quoted._

 _"Sounds good to me," Rigsby had agreed._

 _"Iceman… outstanding," Jamie sighed in acceptance. "Alright, I'll go with that, but what do I call you then?" he had inquired before being cut short by a telling one word reply._

 _"Commander."_

"Reagan, good to see you vertical this time," the now-familiar stern voice brought him back to the present, but Jamie's eyes narrowed a bit as he picked up on a subtle hint of sadness or resignation that had never been present before. Suddenly Oliver Wendell's words yelled down the hall that morning about someone being taken out of the study were concerning. Was it Quincy? He was so hard to read through his all-engrossing positive outlook. Had his newfound friend's surgery failed like so many of the ones he'd obviously had before? Rigsby appeared to still be waiting for his treatment from what he could gather, but he had never felt comfortable enough to approach the question of what was wrong there yet. There was little time to contemplate that before becoming acquainted with another side of the commander as the tougher-than-nails SEAL instructor's persona took over as it came to life and filled the room. In that second Jamie was instantly reduced to less than nothing again. "You get outta that bed on your own today?" Rigs demanded as he eyed the newly added bedrail and trapeze grip.

"N-not yet, sir," Jamie was instantly taken aback and challenged. "I… I wasn't strong enough to pull myself over all the way with one hand," he explained with trepidation as he recalled once again being disappointed that he required assistance from Aaron while Eddie sat there and watched.

"Oh, man, here it comes…" Quincy murmured under his breath as he knew that Rigs had been just biding his time for this point when Jamie was past the surgeries and ready to move forward.

"SO YOU FAILED AT YOUR TASK! That was a statement, not a question, Sergeant Reagan! Well, if that's the case I'd expect you'll be doing some extra calisthenics sets using that bar to make yourself stronger so that doesn't happen again!" Rigs barked at volume. "We've got rules to follow on this team, Iceman, and the first is to get your sorry ass up by yourself no matter what it takes! There was a very famous commencement speech given a few years ago by Naval Admiral William H. McRaven, ninth commander of U.S. Special Operations Command, at the University of Texas at Austin. It outlines succinctly the guidelines we choose to live by and it's not about whether you ever served a day in uniform. As he said, 'it matters not your gender, your ethnic or religious background, your orientation, or your social status.' Every single day in SEAL training your bed is inspected, do you want to know why?" he questioned and waited until Jamie shook his head wide-eyed and nearly speechless at this change in demeanor.

"No, sir."

"If you make your bed correctly every morning," Rigs continued with ingrained authority. "You will have accomplished the first task of the day. It will give you a sense of pride and encourage you to do another task and another and another. By the end of the day that one task completed will have turned into many. Little things in life matter. If you can't do the little things right, you will never do the big things right. And, if by chance you have a miserable day, you will return to a bed that is made… one that you made… and a made bed gives you encouragement that tomorrow will be better. RULE NUMBER ONE: IF YOU WANT TO CHANGE THE EFFING WORLD, START BY GETTING UP OFF YOUR ASS AND MAKING YOUR OWN DAMN BED!" he thundered before turning to walk out of the room and leaving his new charge with that piece of weighted advice to contemplate.

"I'd do like he says, dude," Quincy offered his stunned new friend who was wondering what he had just gotten himself into before turning his chair to follow. "This is just the beginning. He's got lots of those rules. See ya later, Ice. _Remember in the morning you'll be better,"_ he sang his familiar line as a reminder on the way out.

###

"Edit! Your phone is down here on the counter! Daniel texted and said he would be arriving in a few minutes to pick you up for the doctor!" Eva yelled up the steps to her daughter after lunch the next day as she was bustling around in the kitchen multitasking her way through a busy few hours. "The medical equipment people are all done setting up in the dining room. They said everything is working and to call with any problems, and the ramp company is running late, but they'll be here any minute to discuss our needs, and I will be off to Kaylin's school as soon as we are finished with that. Henry is already there for the start of the party," she reported as Eddie came down the steps dressed in a loose top and a more comfortable set of newly purchased yoga pants as the lemon was demanding more roomy accommodations. "Don't worry, I will take care of everything here," her mother reminded. "I already put them on notice that I expect them to have the paperwork in order and everything installed by Friday at the latest in case Jamison is able to come home this weekend. Do you think that's still the case?" she asked hopefully.

"I don't know, Mom," Eddie answered with disappointment evident on her face after the previous day's shock of watching him struggle to try to get out of bed alone. "Some of what he has to do first is still really hard for him," she added quietly. "The surgeries and everything… he's not very strong yet. Maybe it's asking too much to hope he can be here with us for Christmas," she teared up and turned away as her emotions had been running close to the surface all morning despite her resolve to put on a brave face for everyone. Perhaps it wasn't such a bad idea to have Danny with her although she fully intended to give him the out of staying in the car while she was inside for the appointment.

"Edit, that is just a day on the calendar," Eva chided. "A very important day for you and his family and I understand that Kaylin will be upset for a time if he is not here, but what's more important is that he will be soon after if not then. That's all that matters, lány."

"You haven't even seen him yet though," Eddie continued quietly. "He's not the same, Mom. He may never be. He's afraid to show me all that's happened… and honestly now I'm afraid to look. What if I can't handle it either?" she asked. "What if I do or say the wrong thing to make him feel like he's… broken," she sighed.

"Edit, you are doing your very best," Eva assured. "Jamison will understand… although I worry about the same," she admitted under her breath as tact had never been her strong point and she was not yet comfortable with this new role in her extended family. "Everyone will help," she declared more strongly though. "And Kaylin is much better now with everything. She was so happy again last night playing football with her friends at the gymnasium. Daniel made a special effort for them all to have a fun time. Many of the children were teasing him and kicking the ball to make him duck and run away, especially that little boy named Colin. It was good to hear her laugh like that again," she admitted. "She didn't want to leave."

"It's called soccer here, Mom, and he has good reason to run away from Colin," Eddie smiled involuntarily though herself as the events of that memorable last outdoor game came back to her considering the little boy had taken the big, bad NYPD detective down to the ground with one mis-aimed boot of the ball. "Danny is a good uncle and brother," she acknowledged even though he and Jamie tended to have rough patches once in awhile. "He's always there for us."

"And he is here now, and so are the others," Eva observed through the window as a green Jeep and white box van pulled into the drive together. "Come, it is time to leave and go check on my new unoka," Eva reminded as she pulled her own jacket on before shooshing her daughter out the front door with a hug and kiss along with her her coat, purse and sports bottle. "Drink your water and you will see, all will be well. I love you, baby. Take care of her, Daniel!" she reminded with a shout and a wave from the porch and watched as the unlikely pair departed for the hospital before turning her attention to the matter at hand and the company now standing in the driveway. "Here is where I wish the ramp to go," she indicated while pointing to the side entrance along the driveway as she hurried over to the two men standing near the sidewalk. "Jamison must be able to get in and out of a vehicle here and into a wheelchair and up to the side deck and through to the kitchen safely and without effort," she insisted as a cold breeze ruffled them. "My daughter is pregnant and will not be able to assist him if it is strenuous."

"Ma'am, in order to get the right angle to do that with where the deck steps are, we're going to have to extend the ramp pretty far down the drive and near the sidewalk here," the salesman advised as he took some quick walking measurements. "The Bay Ridge planning commission will never grant a permit for that because of safety issues and possible complaints from the neighbors. We'll just have to add a turn here to keep it back."

"Safety issues? For whom?" Eva's voice mounted. "It is set back more than the acceptable distance on their property! I checked the statutes myself and measured as well! His leg cannot be bent at this time as I told you, and then also they cannot park the car here and he will have to get out in the street and be brought up this incline! Unacceptable!" she declared and was too preoccupied with the situation to notice a third man approaching on the sidewalk from down the street. "Do better!"

"Anything I can help with?" a somewhat chilling voice interrupted and Eva wheeled around to find it attached to a man with an equally cold set of grey eyes prying at her from above his plaid jacket and thick scarf and below a wool hat. In all the discord of the previous week, Eddie had neglected to warn her mother about the odd neighbor from down the street as the older Janko woman was not likely to socialize with the locals, anyway. "Did someone get hurt?" he asked with a nod towards the van and its obvious business display on the side. "I live in the Cape Cod over there… we're neighbors. Haven't seen the mister around here in a few weeks," he offered while fishing for some more information on Jamie's condition since Frank Reagan has been successful thus far in keeping his son's accident out of the news cycle and after tailing Eddie up to Columbia one evening, he had been sufficiently discouraged by the tight security present to do any snooping there for the time being. Obviously Jamison Reagan was still in serious shape, but given the work here the past few days it appeared as if he had made somewhat of a recovery. If nothing happened soon though he had been planning on forwarding a little anonymous tip to the _Post_ to play the grinch and ruin the Reagans' holiday spirit a tad more. Maybe it was time to do that, anyway.

"I'm sure that's _none_ of your business," Eva responded evenly as she eyed him up and took an instant dislike to his nosy fashion before dismissing him in turn. "If you'll excuse us," she inferred with a directed look up the walkway towards his house. "This is a private matter."

"Of course, ma'am, sorry to intrude," he grinned back with more mirth than he should have displayed before excusing himself with a nod and continuing on his way towards home with a large smile now hidden behind his back. That well thought out plan of his had needed some major adjustments, and now some hard to find parts and a little more time to put the Chevelle back in one piece again, but all in all things were working out better than he thought would be possible and he was enjoying every moment of this game for now.

"Now," Eva continued as she turned her attention back to the two remaining men from the ramp company and the immediate problem at hand. "I want the name and number of whoever I must speak with at this planning commission, and I will have this sorted immediately," she declared while taking out her phone. "Jamison will have exactly what he needs in place before he comes home if I have anything to say about it!"

###

"Danny, I told you… Jamie and I talked. He's fine now about me coming here alone; you really don't need to do this," Eddie assured quietly sensing her brother-in-law's continued reluctance while he pulled into a spot in the parking garage closest to the elevators at St. Victor's and nervously drummed his fingers on the steering wheel in a state of obvious discomfort as he found himself below the now familiar offices of Dr. Geisner once more. "I mean we're here now, but it's really okay if you just sit in the car or go in the cafeteria for some coffee," she added. "I'll probably be about an hour. I hate that you had to give up part of your day off. What did Linda say?" she asked as she started to gather her things. "She's not working here today, is she?"

"Oh, uh… no, not yet. Hopefully next week between the holidays and she's looking forward… well, I mean she's okay to pick up a couple of hours helping the kid out as a visiting nurse if… I mean when... he comes home for a few days. Every little bit helps with the bills at this time of year. I told her I was doing some last minute Christmas shopping this afternoon," he revealed as he thought back to an hour or so ago when he had left his wife at home in Staten Island under an assumed premise… she had been almost eager to see him go, or so he thought. It really wasn't lying if he actually did buy something, right? "This… if she knew where I was, would be awkward," he swallowed.

"Oh, I know… this is totally weird and I'm so sorry!" Eddie apologized again. "You're a really good brother, Danny, and I can't thank you enough for doing that soccer practice last night too. Mom said it made Kaylin really happy, and she needs so much more of that right now."

"I was glad to do it for her… and this," he assured as he turned the car off. "Anything to help you out, and those kids made me laugh too," he admitted. "I needed that… even though the little guy with the big foot was still aiming for me," he grimaced as his hand slid lower on his lap to protect himself with a rather painful memory resurfacing. "Hey, listen… I forgot to mention that the parents were asking about having a sort of get well party for Jamie the next time. They're all wondering about what happened to him. I told them I wasn't sure when he'll be able to get out, but I know it will probably cheer him up to see the kids too. Stacey Dawson said she would call you and arrange everything whenever he's ready for that."

"Oh, that would be great!" Eddie brightened for a second and enthused. "He loves that team, and he really needs to feel like Kaylin's dad again. I'm not sure when he'll come home… maybe Saturday, but I'm hoping he'll get to spend most of next week with us here since Aaron said his therapy still has to be minimal while he's got the stitches and staples in… just stretching and stuff. He's a super nice guy and offered to stop in here before work because he lives close by. Maybe we can do it then. After that Jamie will for sure have to stay up there and only come home on the weekends for a while," she admitted before taking a breath and focusing on the task at hand. "But it's almost my appointment time and we've gotta get through this thing with munchie first. I'll text you when I'm done. Thanks again for doing this," she stated once more before stepping out of the car. "Oh, I almost forgot. Dr. Kenzie asked that Linda come up to Columbia either tomorrow or Friday morning around nine so that the nurses can show her what needs to be done for Jamie's leg now that the metal thing is gone and about the antibiotics and other stuff he needs I guess. They're going to put in some kind of chest port soon so they can stop stabbing his arm… it looks terrible, all bruised up from the IVs. Maybe I shouldn't get my hopes up that he'll be able to come home for Christmas, anyway," she sighed. "But if there's any chance…"

"Friday, she'll be there with bells on," Danny assured. "I'll tell her."

"Thanks," Eddie added quietly as the notion hit her hard once more especially after yesterday how unlikely it was that everything would fall just right for Jamie to see his little girl open presents under a psychedelic tree this year.

"You're welcome, and good luck," he offered with relief to be staying behind before she shut the door and he watched her walk over to the elevator bravely by herself and disappear as it closed even though he knew she must be terrified to be doing this alone without her other half.

"This is nuts, kid… you so owe me big time for agreeing to come here," he fretted out loud to his missing brother as he sank back into his seat while weighing the guilt of letting Eddie go up there by herself anyway when he had promised to look out for her, and at the same time wondering if it would be better to move the car into a more hidden spot to avoid the possibility of being seen by one of his wife's co-workers while sitting here in the garage. "Why would they care?" he convinced himself out loud. "It's not like I'm not at this place every other day on a case or something else whether she's here or not. I could always say I needed to pick up some paperwork or something from the M.E. on that dead guy we scraped up out of the street the other night and I stopped by because I was in the area. No one would give it a second thought, not even Linda, and the emergency room is way over on the other side of the building anyway," he reasoned, but continued to dissuade himself from following Eddie to the third floor for a full twenty minutes before he broke in overwhelming guilt as he imagined what might be going on up there.

"Alright, I'm just gonna sit in the waiting room until she comes out," he continued to mutter to himself as he rode the elevator up to the floor and got out before making his way into Dr. Geisner's office which seemed notably empty except for one other nervous couple since even the scheduling nurse normally stationed at the desk appeared to be missing and he hoped that wasn't some kind of bad omen. "Right here, with my back to the wall," he added before plopping down. "That way I can see if she's upset when she walks out of there and I can tell the kid with a clear conscience that I did what I promised to," he added before picking up the latest _Sports Illustrated_ issue and nervously starting to thumb through it although his focus was anywhere but on the photos of some southern amateur golf classic.

"Danny?" Nancy Baylor's voice caught his attention from behind the glass. "Oh, thank goodness you're here!… I was just about to call you!" she revealed as she opened the sliding partition before catching herself being so informal in front of another patient and his heart sank as he remembered now that this particular nurse was one of Linda's good friends and often moonlighted with her in the ER. _Busted,_ he thought before the obvious worry on the woman's face and her tone dropped his heart and pushed all other thoughts aside. "I'm sorry, I need to speak with you privately," she warned as she opened the door and waved him in. "Mrs. Reagan is very upset," she continued before he joined her and she closed it behind them. "I think maybe you should come back here and talk to her," she urged.

"Back here?" Danny broke out into a cold sweat at the thought as he stood in the hall with his feet rooted to the ground. "I mean I came to support her and all, but I'm not sure I should..." he swallowed hard at the notion of seeing his brother's wife that way. "She's dressed, right? Something bad happened, didn't it? The test was bad?"

"Yes, I'm so sorry, Danny. I know how hard this must be. Dr. Geisner was just in there and confirmed. It looks like she's suffering an early loss. The pregnancy was not viable."

"She's _losing_ the baby?!" Danny reeled back and went pale as he wondered just how much more his brother and Eddie would be able to take after the events of the past few weeks. Surely this would destroy the two of them and end all hope of his recovery anytime soon. His mind was spinning with emotions as he contemplated what he possibly could say to his sister-in-law or Jamie in this situation to make it even one iota better before the nurse led him back and opened the door to the last exam room on the left and his entire world flashed in a nuclear white mushroom cloud as a tearful, shocked blond face with blue eyes looked up and locked on his.

 _"LINDA?!"_

* * *

 _Now, I know with the setup of the last however many chapters some of you were probably already expecting that Danny was about to run into his wife here while trying to be a good guy and accompany Eddie to the "lady doctor," but I'm sure not too many were anticipating that. Having been through a bit of this myself, apologies if it upset anyone, but in truth I've been struggling with this notion of another Reagan baby bean since deciding to explore it as an option because the emotions are so strong, and even as I was writing this chapter so far into the story I still had not honestly decided which direction our older lovebirds will take on their late life baby quest. Rest assured I do have a plan in place now and whichever way it goes, it will be a journey they shoulder together hopefully with no more secrets from here on out._

 _Next, Jamie and Eddie talk their way through the results of her exam as it happens which will offer some surprises of its own before Daniel Reagan is left alone to juggle two very emotional and hormonal blond Reagan woman at the same time. God bless him._


	57. Chapter 57

Chapter 57

"Hey, handsome, so what's going on up there?" Eddie's reassuring voice came over the phone at twenty after two as she settled back on the table in her own otherwise empty exam room, which unbeknownst to her was at the opposite end of the hall from her now devastated sister- and brother-in-law. "Things are running a little late here today, lambchop," she informed her husband. "I didn't want you to worry. Apparently, Christine was in a minor fender-bender on her way into work this morning so they have someone else here covering, but Dr. Geisner said she'd be in personally to do my scan… it might just take a while. From what the nurse said there's someone else having a crisis right now."

"Oh, okay; that's too bad though," Jamie answered as he fidgeted in his seat, totally unaware that he was talking about his own family members at that moment. "Tough time of the year to have that happen; I feel bad for them," he offered while saying a prayer that their baby outlook was better before spilling out his own news which was upbeat for a change and could no longer be contained even though he had wanted to wait and surprise her when visited. "Ed, guess what!"

"What?"

"I did it!… I managed to get all the way out of bed by myself today!" he reported enthusiastically. "And it wasn't even that hard," he added proudly, reveling in what to others would sound like a small, inconsequential accomplishment. "If I can get back in, then tomorrow Aaron said he'll bring a wheelchair so I can get the hang of moving around some more and maybe even transferring in and out of the bathroom so I can start taking care of myself. I'm gonna do it soon… I'm really gonna get to come home and be with you and sweetness!"

"Oh, Jamie, that's the best thing ever!" Eddie enthused as she practically bounced in place. "I'm so proud of you! But you were kind of down yesterday when I was there, what made such a big difference today?"

"I don't know… Quincy and Rigs came to see me too after you left. Quince wanted to play basketball and Rigs said I had to work harder, maybe that helped give me the kick in the ass I needed. He said I should make my own bed, and I couldn't yet, but I just feel better today."

"Making your bed and playing basketball?" Eddie quizzed with one raised eyebrow as her overprotective mamma genes kicked in given where she was sitting at the moment and she inadvertently downplayed his accomplishment. "Baby, Quincy's in a different place right now; I don't think you're gonna be ready for basketball anytime soon. What if someone runs into you or the ball bounces up and hits your leg the wrong way? He doesn't have to worry about that so much."

"Just free throws, he said he'd show me how to do it from a chair when I was allowed in the gym," Jamie answered back with a little disappointment evident while feeling as if she had just squashed that tiny bit of forward momentum he'd felt.

"Well, we'll talk about that later with Dr. Kenzie, okay? Jamie, I'm gonna put you on speaker now because the other ultrasound tech just walked in," Eddie reported as she eyed the obviously young and inexperienced-looking girl that had just entered.

"Hi, my name is Jeannie," she reported with a high-pitched bubbly verve. "Dr. Geisner asked me to come down here and just set up and take some baseline measurements while she's in with another patient."

"Wait, how old is she, Ed?" Jamie voiced his concern over the line as his own protective papa dander was raised from afar. "No offense, but it sounds like she's twelve. I don't want someone who doesn't know what they're doing touching you and the baby!"

"Jamie, it's an abdominal ultrasound… she's not doing laser guided open heart surgery," Eddie chided gently as she sought to put both him and this new tech at ease before confirming that fact. "You are just doing a regular one, right?"

"Oh, yes!" Jeannie enthused as she took a few minutes to orient herself. "I'm starting my clinical rotation in obstetrics today, as a matter of fact. I'll only be observing and performing the basics for a while. I was supposed to be shadowing Christine today, but I guess she had a little oopsie with her car so I'm just trying to pitch in and help wherever I can. Dr. Geisner said she was going to quiz me when she got here to see how well I did."

"Terrific," Jamie muttered as the stress of being isolated at a distance and reduced to just listening to the process put him on edge. "Now it's like we're on a game show… I'll take 'Uterus' for fifty, Alex," he mocked.

"It's fine," Eddie assured. "My husband was in an accident and he's still in the hospital," she explained. "He really wanted to be here, and he was expecting we'd have Christine from before. Jamie, I'm good… don't worry, honey. It just means I get to see the munchie for longer today. I'll tell you all about _her,"_ she joked and tried to lighten his mood.

"Okay!" Jeannie approached with the wand in her hand and bottle of warmed gel. "Here we go! Let's see… fourteen weeks puts you at about the size of…"

"An avocado," Jamie interrupted impatiently.

"No, honey… that's not for a couple of weeks, right?" Eddie corrected with a little concern at another uncharacteristic error creeping back in after he'd seemed more with it the past few days. "It's still a lemon right now."

"That's what I said, didn't I?" he replied back with a note of confusion.

"No, Jamie… you just misspoke, don't worry about it," Eddie urged before being distracted by the images on the screen. "Ooh, there! No, there! She's playing peek-a-boo, but I see her!" she added with a laugh as Jeannie intermittently brought their little beloved fruit into focus, continuing their normal back and forth gender banter without realizing that this new tech did not have the benefit of knowing the two had just been playing a game and had not yet decided if they truly wished to find out the sex of their child or not.

"Wow, I've heard good things about her, but this Christine must be amazing if she could already tell you she was positive it was a girl at your last appointment," Jeannie chattered on while taking Eddie's word and not confirming the couple's choice on her chart. "I mean there it is, plain as day, but usually you can't be sure of it at the twelve week stage unless you have a very well-developed little boy," she continued. "We were taught girls sometimes make you wait until at least week sixteen or eighteen before you can be confident. Or did you have one of those early pregnancy blood tests? I heard they were 99% accurate at nine weeks."

"Wait, it _is_ a girl?" Eddie gasped as her face fell and her mouth dropped open as she looked at the phone with a broken heart. When the two had realized he couldn't be present for this appointment, they agreed not to find out even if there was a chance until they could be together for that moment… and here it had been snatched away and poor Jamie wouldn't even have a visual to remember. "We were just _joking_ with each other! There's a big note in the chart! Christine knew we were supposed to be asked if we wanted to find out the sex first! He's not even here with me!" she cried.

"OH NO! OH, CRAP! I'm so sorry!" Jeannie gasped. "Oh, my gosh I didn't even look there first! Oh, God, that's like the cardinal sin of OB ultrasounds! And I made it on my very first day!" she started to hyperventilate. "Dr. Geisner is going to fail me right out of the gate! All that schooling and those student loans I took out!"

"Oopsie," came Jamie's scathing remark back as far off in a hospital room at Columbia there was a smacking sound as the heel of a palm struck a forehead with force.

"Hang on for a second, _please_ don't get upset, Jamie," Eddie begged, thinking about his blood pressure first and foremost. "I'm gonna handle this. I'll talk to her... NOW LISTEN!" she hissed quickly before putting her phone on mute and blame it on hormones or Christmas spirit or what have you, she suddenly sympathised with this young girl who had made a big blunder and decided to pay it forward while ensuring that Jamie never had to be reminded of this again. "I made a rookie mistake once too when I was only on the job three weeks and it could have wrecked my career. Somebody gave me the benefit of the doubt even though I should have been fired, and I ended up pretty damn good at what I do with the best family I could have ever wished for. I'm gonna let you off just this _once._ Don't you _ever_ make that mistake again. My husband has a lousy poker face so he can NEVER have this brought up in front of him. You put a big note in red letters that says we decided NOT to find out the sex and NOT to even ask us again because it's too tempting. Then you make sure you NEVER EVER get assigned to ultrasound me again, capice? Now stay quiet, take the measurements you were supposed to and go get lost in a broom closet with a tummy ache or a migraine or whatever and get the hell out of here before Dr. Geisner comes back!" she finished before clicking back to her husband and off speaker. "Jamie?"

"Yeah?"

"Sorry, I must have hit the wrong button and lost you there for a second. It's okay, lambchop… what's done is done right? She's gone," she informed him with a premature fib as she lay back and raised her shirt again while pointing at her belly so that the shocked tech could do as ordered. "I told her what I really thought of her and I'll have a word with them out front before I leave, but then I NEVER EVER want to think about it ever again when I'm here because it's too upsetting so I'm gonna pretend it didn't even happen. Aww..." she trailed off while melting with a huge frowny face and tears at the image of their baby on the screen waving at her once more since she couldn't share with him. "And I'll make sure no one even brings it up to us again. We'll talk about it when I come to visit you tonight and then let's just forget and move on since we can't go back in time or change it. All we need to know is that our baby girl is healthy, right? You said that boys tend to get this kidney thing worse anyway, so maybe this is a good sign. Let's just focus on that for now, okay?"

"You're probably right, Ed," Jamie agreed as he blew out a breath after holding it through that whole long dissertation and vowed to hide his great disappointment at missing this moment from her given the fact that she had to carry so much of this pregnancy on her own now. To do anything else would just be another burden. "It'll just be a story we can torture our grandkids with someday at the dinner table," he tried to hearten all the while rubbing his temples in renewed stress. "I guess it's a good thing that Wilson ended up adding on to our bathroom anyway if we have two girls."

"That's the spirit, baby," Eddie sighed in relief as Jeannie mouthed "I'm really, really sorry and thank you!" before taking a quick and quiet leave.

"I wonder what's keeping Dr. Geisner so long?"

###

"So this appears to be what we term a chemical pregnancy," Dr. Geisner informed another pair of Reagans at that very moment as they sat side-by-side in her office gripping each other's hands as a lifeline while they both fought a cascade of emotions from grief and shock to anger and disbelief while Linda discarded an increasingly deep pile of used tissues to staunch the heavy flow of tears from her red-rimmed eyes and he sat rigid and stone-faced straight forward with a clenched jaw and glassy pale expression. "This is a pregnancy in which the woman tests positive but miscarries before anything can be seen in the uterus on ultrasound. Therefore the only evidence that she was ever pregnant is the chemical reaction that caused the pregnancy test to turn positive. This is also known as a very early miscarriage. Linda, your blood test today revealed very low hCG levels which tell us you did indeed have an egg that fertilized and implanted in the uterus, but then could not continue to grow for some reason."

"I know what a chemical pregnancy is," Linda replied hoarsely as she sniffed and grabbed another tissue. "You don't have to explain."

"Well, _I'm_ kinda playing catchup here," Danny broke his silence with a strained voice as he had remained largely quiet since first laying shocked eyes on her back in the exam room, although after a moment's hesitation he had instinctively moved over to pull her close to and let his obviously distraught wife cry against him. However, to this point his mind had remained numb, and the words had not been forthcoming so very little had been said between them other than the bare minimum of the what, but not even close to the why. "I'd appreciate if you could, um... you know, keep going," he added in a tight rasp to Dr. Geisner. "Please… I want to understand what's happened here…"

"Danny…" the floodgates started to open between them.

"Because I really don't, Linda. I don't understand why we're sitting here in this situation right now, and I need _someone_ to help me figure it out."

"Keep going then," his wife waved the doctor on.

"Alright," Dr. Geisner continued with sympathy as it was not the first time she had seen such desperation and hoped that a calm voice in the storm would help this couple navigate through. "According to statistics, chemical pregnancies account for between fifty and seventy-five percent of all miscarriages. Unlike later miscarriages, they occur a week or two after implantation. In cases in which the woman is not expecting to become pregnant, she may not even realize she has been and miscarried, since menstrual bleeding often occurs around the same time. If she _is_ expecting to become pregnant and takes a test, she may get false positive pregnancy result which appears to be the case here as Linda reported a positive test one week ago today which would have been six days before menstruation was due."

"You took a test before," the detective in Danny deduced in a remarkably contained manner as he continued to stare ahead and calmly worked this out in his mind with the doctor's assistance. "So you _were_ expecting this… and you kept it from me for a week, or longer, right? Or was this part of a grand plan to do whatever you wanted, anyway? Even after what happened with your back and those nerve things… what we talked about… the quality of your _life,_ Linda… _our_ future! You _planned_ this?"

"No… I didn't _plan_ it, you have to believe me, Danny," she explained around blowing her nose and squeezing his hand tighter. "It was that night before Jamie… before you left for Washington, when you were so… aggressive, and we… you asked, but the calendar on my new phone was messed up and the dates when we had to be careful were off a week… I swear… and I didn't realize any of it until after I went over things with the nurse in Dr. Jacob's office and she figured out I made a mistake. Please tell me you understand that!" she begged. "I never meant to hurt or keep this from you!"

"So all that pain you were in… all that crying that weekend. You knew you might be, and you didn't take any of the medication. You lied and let me and the boys worry about you like that?"

"I… I did," she confessed. "Please, Danny, you have to understand… so much was happening with your brother… I was upset at first because you picked his case over coming home to my appointment… then you just assumed we were done with all this and you were so stressed and not sleeping hardly at all again and I just didn't want to do _this_ unless there was a reason…"

"Research has shown up to seventy percent of all conceptions end in miscarriage," Dr. Geisner interjected again. "With the sensitivity of today's tests… we see this quite often now."

"Why… uh, I mean what causes this?" he continued even as some of the emotion broke free and an intermittent set of tears welled up and rolled forth down his cheeks. "Was it something I did? The stress? I don't know if you heard, but Jamie was hit by a car and he's hurt bad," he asked as he self consciously wiped them with his sleeve. "I, um, didn't mean to shut her out… because I do that to her sometimes when I get focused on other things."

"No, absolutely not," Dr. Geisner assured. "While no one can be certain of an exact cause, most believe it happens for the same reasons other miscarriages do… abnormal chromosomes in the developing embryo, at least in half the cases. Abnormal chromosomes can be the result of many factors we discussed before, such as poor quality of the sperm or egg, genetic abnormalities passed down by the mother or father, or just an unfortunate abnormal cell division of the fetus. Other factors could include undiagnosed uterine infections and other imbalances."

"What now… I mean is there something that has to be done?" Danny managed to whisper as he had seen the aftermath of a miscarriage before… two to be exact, and what that had entailed to a certain degree both physically and psychologically for his mother, although Mary had been much further along with both when it occurred.

"Physically? No," the doctor advised before addressing her patient directly. "Linda, considering your current levels, I would expect your bleeding will commence within the next few days. It might be heavier with more cramping than normal, but your body will almost certainly take care of this on its own. We'll follow up with some additional blood tests to ensure that your hCG levels return to normal, as tubal or ectopic pregnancies can mimic chemical pregnancies. I know that in your case there are considerations because of your back issues and age, but I must tell you there is no evidence suggesting chemical pregnancies will affect future pregnancies."

"That, um… won't be… I don't think…" Danny trailed off while taking in a heavy breath, after all he had thought this book had been closed before. "Well, I didn't. I guess I don't know as much about that as I thought."

"Counseling can help you both cope with the loss, as even one such as this can bring up intense emotions," Dr. Geisner added before taking her leave as she sensed that the nuts and bolts of the situation were now in place and being processed. "Why don't I step out and give you two a few minutes alone and I'll get some names for you?"

"Is that what we need, Lin… counseling? Because after all that I still don't know how we got here," he admitted with a shake of his head as now without the doctor's presence his gaze shifted down to the floor and he was still unwilling to look his wife in the face.

"I was going to tell you tonight, Danny, either way… I really was. And why were you here?" Linda's voice cracked and raised. "You brought your sister-in-law to her appointment?!" she hissed in jealousy. "It was important enough to be on time for her? Christmas shopping? You weren't telling me the truth either!"

 _Eddie,_ he remembered with a start; she was somewhere in this hallway right now too and who knows how things had gone for her. How were they going to explain this to the family?

"The truth is I told a white lie to spare your feelings," he reminded as only the basis for his ill-timed presence in the waiting room had been revealed. "Linda, I didn't say anything to you last night, but there might be a problem with their baby too. My brother was freaking out about not being here, and asked me to do this because nobody else could, so I said I would drive her in case she got bad news, that's all. The baby might have kidney issues or worse..." he trailed off.

"Oh… God, well, I didn't know _that!"_ she choked back in further shock as even in her own grief it was hard to imagine being in those shoes, and the hurt she had been holding unfairly against Eddie softened a little.

"I heard there was something, but not all of it... Jamie just told me yesterday, but it showed up on the scan or whatever she had before he left for DC and they've been dealing with all that on top of everything else. Eddie needed to wait for another test today to be sure, and even though he couldn't be with her she told me not to come or to stay in the car, but I didn't feel right about doing that. This was about helping them through something… it had nothing to do with us, except I knew it would upset you, so I tried keep it quiet for now."

"So she's here, and now she'll know about _this,"_ Linda fretted as she wrung her hands in front of her. "They'll all know about _this,"_ she cried. "I can't, Danny, I've been avoiding her because of _this,_ and now knowing that something's the matter with their baby they'll think I wished it on them," she added irrationally. "I can't face them if they know what I did… and after everything we went through last summer…"

"Stop it! There's no way anyone would ever think such a thing! Linda, you need to get ahold of yourself a little!" he admonished before softening. "I get some of it now," he admitted and stopped her before that kind of wall could go up between them again. "I mean I'm not gonna lie and say I understand what happened here today, not yet, or the physical need… I know it's different for me, but the other night at soccer with Kaylin and her friends, for a second when she ran up to me giggling I forgot she wasn't ours, and I just enjoyed being a dad with a little kid and laughing at silly stuff again… it was the best I felt about anything all week."

"Oh, Danny… that's what I'm missing too, and I thought this was a sign that it was meant to be, but I guess it's not. Everything Dr. Geisner warned us about because we are older… the eggs and sperm and everything not being right," she cried. "Our baby was here in me, I could feel that again, I swear it! But it wasn't right!"

"Linda, please don't blame yourself for this… it's just one of those things. I guess we'll never know if that's why it happened, and I don't know where we go from here," he admitted with a heavy sigh and another wipe of his eyes. "Maybe it's done now, or maybe this is supposed to show us there's another way... not like this though. We can't risk it, but we're going there together, Lin, I know my mom would want us to figure this out; she would understand how you feel and I'm trying to. Promise me, no more secrets, and we'll go to counseling. I want to help… I don't want to be so far apart again that we're not looking at the same picture. I still love you Linda Bellis Reagan," he added with a kiss to her forehead as he reached over and wrapped his arm around to pull her close once more. "You're my life."

"And I love you too, Danny. I just need some time alone with this… just us right now," she admitted while sobbing harder and letting some of the pain out of her heart. "I want to crawl in my bed for a week, forget it's Christmas and never come out."

"I know you do right now," he admitted softly before continuing after a few moments as he considered there were more issues to address that didn't just involve their personal branch of the family tree. "I know you do, but we can't stay away… Eddie and Jamie need us… they need you. Maybe after today more than ever. I promised her that you would go up to the hospital on Friday morning and learn what you had to so Jamie could come home this weekend if he's able. I know how hard that will be, but we can't not do that, Linda… _this_ can't be the reason that Kaylin doesn't have her daddy at home for Christmas… I couldn't handle knowing that and there's no other way. Focus on doing this for her, please, honey, for Kaylin if no one else, and I promise I will do everything in my power to make this better for you."

"What about today… now?" she whimpered. "I can't face Eddie like this. I'm a mess…"

"I know. Stay here. I'm going to go out and talk to Dr. Geisner and get those names, and then I'll talk to her about Eddie… If something's wrong I'm gonna have to find a way to drive her home; I promised my brother. Maybe I can get Erin down here to cover me so we can leave right away, but otherwise I'll give Eddie my keys and she can take the Jeep while I'll take you home in your car, okay? If she asks I'll tell her Baez picked me up for a case. She won't have to know you were here that way, and we can keep this between us until you're ready."

"Okay, thank you for that," Linda agreed tearfully before he left her, and after a brief conversation with Danny in the hall, Dr. Geisner pressed forward with his plan and took a deep breath before knocking on yet another door to examine a second Reagan woman of the day with hopes for a better outcome this time.

"Good afternoon, Eddie," she smiled while entering. "I apologize for the delay, but things were a little crazy in here today. I'm so sorry to hear about Jamie's accident… there seems to be a lot of that going around, and I know you're both anxious for this update, so let's get started."

* * *

 _Not an easy day in Dr. G's office for the Reagan clan, and she doesn't even know the half of it thanks to a little mercy shown to Jeannie after the girl baby oopsie. Of course Eddie was reflecting back on that epi when she was a rookie and the subject of her first investigation, nearly losing her job in the process after misreporting part of an arrest before her future father-in-law gave her a break. Next, we get an update on the current status of the lemon while Danny inadvertently lets his sister-in-law hanging, perhaps forgetting under stress that he could ignite World War III by calling Erin down for backup before a few more OCs show up to help._


	58. Chapter 58

Chapter 58

"Okay, are we all set now? Jamie, can you hear me clearly?" Dr. Geisner tested their connection and then continued by putting the wand on Eddie's gel-covered belly and bringing the lemon into quick focus after she received an affirmative reply from the other stressed out Reagan brother of the day. "I know you're both very anxious to focus right down there on the kidneys," she admitted. "But I would be remiss if I didn't look at some basic indicators first, and I seem to have misplaced my intern who was tasked with taking these this afternoon," she reported while a contentious snort was heard from a room at Columbia before Eddie stepped in to cover and distract before her husband could follow up any further.

"Oh, Jamie… she's sucking her thumb!" she enthused with a wondrous tone of awe in her voice that quickly placated him. "I'm actually seeing that, right?"

"Yes, that's correct," Dr. Geisner confirmed with a knowing eye towards that now obvious note on the chart as she framed her answers carefully and took a few stills to print out. "At this stage of development believe it or not that's already the main activity for a baby. Interestingly, studies also show that when the mother eats something sweet, the taste of the amniotic fluid changes, and if the child likes it, he or she swallows it more often now that the taste buds are developing."

"Oh, well... if that's the case this kid will get a real workout in there," Jamie chimed in as he relaxed a smidge with the fact that it appeared the baby's activity was normal for its age, and that had to be a good sign, right?

"Watch it, weisenheimer," Eddie griped back as she continued to stare at the screen and nearly forgot about the very important matter that brought them here that day as she reveled in the baby trivia matters that Jamie had been neglecting to keep her informed of on a daily basis as of late. "What else?"

"Well, along with that, the baby's feelings are becoming more diverse. They begin to show definite mood swings and stages. At the same time the sensitivity of the skin is being increased. Additionally, the fetus is growing and gaining weight very rapidly. If you could look at your baby, you would see that he or she looks like a newborn already, however, is still very thin as there is no need yet to accumulate adipose tissue. Right now, the development and improvement of the major systems are top priority. The sexual organs are already at the final stage of development, but I see from the note here we are to move on from that," she informed without adding the fact that determining the sex of a baby at this point was still really an iffy proposition for even the most experienced technician. "The face is quite well developed though, and there are eyebrows and lashes present."

"Oh, no, Jamie… she's right. I think I see the stubborn Reagan chin already in place," Eddie reported as she tried to maintain his connection and move him away from commenting on the disastrous reveal. "We're doomed."

"Alright, I think I have just about all the rest covered," the doctor informed. "The heart rate looks excellent and all other measurements fall into normal parameters, which is a very good sign," she encouraged. "The fetus is on the more petite side, but activity is good. I'm just going to check the amniotic fluid index by measuring the levels in the deepest, unobstructed, vertical length of four quadrant pockets and add that up... Hmm," she paused after a moment and brought Eddie and Jamie crashing back into their frightening reality with just that single tone. "Your AFI score is just a bit low, Eddie," she advised with a knowing frown. "This is only an estimate, but you are at a seven. An AFI between eight and 18 is considered normal. We like to see about a median of 14 from week 20 through 35 when the amniotic fluid begins to reduce in preparation for the birth."

"So just a little lower than normal," Eddie asked with a frowny face while trying to hide the concern now gripping her heart and keep it from invading her voice. "Just like Kaylin, right Jamie?… She's just a tiny bit under her percentiles, but she's perfectly okay and healthy. You always tell me not to worry, and that her pediatrician should go take a hike when he harps on stuff like that. Just because she's a little small doesn't mean she's not fine, right?" she railed, wanting nothing more in that moment than his absolute reassurance which was not immediately forthcoming.

"What does low mean?" his tight voice asked instead as he focused back on the doctor's words. "That's what the concern was going forward last time wasn't it?" he begged for an answer. "You said that if the kidneys weren't working the way they should be the fluid level would be low, and that causes problems…" he trailed off as all the fun and games they were trying to hide behind had come to a screeching halt once more and the ugly specter of a heartbreaking goodbye reared up again with force and he found himself getting lightheaded at the thought while wishing his father was there to talk him down again.

"An AFI of five to six or lower is considered as oligohydramnios," Dr. Geisner reluctantly informed them as she delivered more statistical bad news for what seemed like the hundredth time on a trying day. "We are above that, but definitely flirting with the low end of the scale," she confirmed. "The exact number can vary by gestational age. The fifth percentile is sometimes used as a cutoff value… and we are at seven there as well," she added as she reviewed her charts. "Oligohydramnios is an infrequent finding in the second trimester. Causes at this stage include congenital urinary tract obstruction about fifty percent of the time, premature rupture of membrane, but that is at a much later stage, placental abruption, amnio chorionic separation and a few others also not likely here. We've already noted kidney involvement, so it is safe to assume that is the contributing factor."

"So it's infrequent at this stage," Jamie choked out and pushed forward, wanting nothing more than to reach over and pull his wife close as he imagined her reaction. "Oh, Ed, baby, I'm so sorry I'm not there, DAMN IT!" he cried after slamming his left fist down in anger on the armrest instead and then gritting his teeth as the searing retort came from a number of still-sore unmedicated ribs since he had deliberately chosen not to take any drugs beforehand in an effort to be fully present. "What… um, ow... are the possible consequences if it gets worse and turns into that?" he muffled his gasp and redirected back to the doctor with a tight throat and pounding chest that Marguerite noted with some concern from the monitors in her station across the hall. She had been informed of the subject behind this call, however, and decided to hold off on any intervention to give the couple privacy in what was obviously now a stressful time.

"In the second trimester, longer duration of oligohydramnios increases the risk of pulmonary hypoplasia, abnormal chest wall compliance, and limb deformities and contractures in severe cases. We are not there," she cautioned. "Right now I must stress that every other aspect of the fetus looks normal. Management in borderline cases like this still only increased monitoring through sonographic assessment in case it worsens over time."

"What about the kidneys?" Eddie broke in tearfully as she continued to gaze at the screen and her perfect-looking little baby girl still innocently sucking her thumb without a care in the world with the much-loved stubborn-set chin of her father already evident. "Is there any difference there?"

"Let's go see… while ultrasound is extremely useful in this instance," Dr. Geisner warned as she switched views to focus in on the baby's urinary tract once more. "It's important to remember that fetal tissue is very elastic, which means the swelling on the kidney might look worse on the screen than the condition really is. I'm seeing bilateral involvement this time," she observed after a few moments of careful scrutiny. "Very mild presentation on the left and moderate on the right."

"BOTH?!" Eddie cried as Jamie's heart clenched at the sound since without admitting it to one another they had each been clinging to the notion that one kidney was fine and even if the defect was severe in the other the baby would still be healthy.

"Mildly," Dr. Geisner reemphasized. "Very likely to resolve itself without intervention going forward. Remember that nearly ninety percent of all of these cases are termed transient and rectify on their own, most before birth. Urological abnormalities requiring intervention are identified just over ten percent of the time. We're still a little early on the diagnostic timeline. Around eighteen weeks some more specific measurements can be taken and severity graded based on anteroposterior diameter of the fetal renal pelvis to distinguish fetuses with postnatal reflux or obstruction from those without significant pathology."

"Another month," Eddie surmised since that's all she gleaned from the last statement as those technical words just blurred into nonsensical speech as her heart continued to ache. "So we have to just sit and wait some more?… There's nothing else that we can do in the meantime?"

"I'll order a blood screen to help determine the risk of chromosomal disorders and need for further fetal karyotyping," Dr. Geisner sighed as she put down her equipment and made further notes. "We will send you home with a thorough questionnaire to fill out for the genetics testing and I will refer you to a counselor here at the hospital if necessary. A condition called Autosomal Recessive Polycystic Kidney Disease is rare and can present like this with bilateral involvement, but requires you both carry the affected gene so ruling that out can be accomplished by first testing you, Eddie. I will stress again that it is unlikely, but if we find something there, it will require referral to a center with facilities for specialized prenatal diagnosis and counseling. The decision regarding invasive testing is individualized, based on potential benefits and risks, and should occur at an appropriate time. Boston Children's Hospital has the finest program in the country for this specialty. Dr. James DePaula is preeminent in his field and a close friend. We did our residencies together. I'm going to give him a call later and just bring him into the loop early on this to make sure I am covering absolutely all the bases."

"But boys usually get this more often and worse than girls, right?" Eddie continued to look for any loophole in the situation. "That's what Jamie said when he did his research." The fact that it have been the very topic of their conversation at the moment he had been struck by the car drove a knife through her once more. The universe it seemed was laughing and pelting them with irony as it were.

"Yes," Dr. Geisner agreed as she looked up from her writing and made note once more of the clear orders regarding the couple's wish on sexing written at the top of the chart. "The predominant cause for lower urinary tract obstruction, and the one that most often leads to surgical intervention or severe oligohydramnios is posterior urethral valves in male fetuses," she revealed and wavered at having a further discussion on that topic, but given the fact that it would just add another layer to their worry she decided against it at this point. "Eddie, I'm going to schedule you for another follow up scan here in two weeks and we should have the results of the blood work back by then which will give us time to book an appointment in Boston with Dr. DePaula for eighteen weeks if necessary."

"Boston," Jamie repeated sadly over the line as he once again took in his present state… given his days at Harvard he knew that BCH was at least a four-and-a-half hour drive from their home on a good day… what seemed like an impossible challenge for someone who had to celebrate moving two feet from a bed to a chair alone a few hours ago. Still the guilt for letting her face this on her own gnawed at him. "I'll be there next time if I have to crawl, Ed," he promised anyway as even getting to St. Vic's for the next appointment would be an obvious struggle. "I swear no matter what I have to do you won't be alone for this again. Please come up here and see me soon," he begged softly, needing nothing more in that moment than to hold his wife so they could process this together. "Have Danny bring you… don't come alone."

"I will, Jamie," she assured numbly and accepted Dr. Geisner's scripts for the blood work and follow up scan as she sat up on the edge of the exam table. "I'll… I'll be up there as soon as I can," she promised. "I'm gonna go now and do the blood draw, and then maybe your brother can bring me right away since Mom has my car and they'll be at the school for another hour or so. I'll call when I know what's going on," she assured and then hung up after a battery of "I love yous" were traded.

"Eddie," Dr. Geisner cautioned after that exchange since she had made a promise to another Reagan but tried to remain truthful. "Your brother-in-law, Daniel, approached me just before I came in here. He was called away suddenly, but left the keys to his car at the desk and said that if needed his sister Erin would be stopping by to make sure you got home safely. I think that it might be a good idea if you wait for her since this was obviously upsetting. One of the nurses can come in here and draw your blood and walk it down to the lab. I don't have any other appointments booked for this room this afternoon so you are welcome to wait here."

"Danny left without saying anything to me?" Eddie's mouth dropped open in surprise and disappointment since even though it had been awkward at first, she had been grateful for his presence here especially after what had just been revealed about the potential problems facing the baby inside her. It only took a few more seconds, however, before that bit of shock wore off and she focused on the second part of that equation. "And ERIN is coming here to drive me home? OH, HELL NO!" she replied before shaking her head and sliding to the floor while rooting around for her shoes and gathering her coat and purse to make her escape. "That's so not happening. Thank you for everything, but I'm fine. I'll go down to the lab myself and take his car," she insisted. "You can have them tell her at the desk when she gets here that… that… the primary agent was perfectly willing and capable of taking care of herself!" she asserted before hurrying out in a huff leaving Dr. Geisner to watch with raised eyebrows and wonder with all this obvious strife just what kind of family gathering the Reagans were going to have for the holidays this year.

###

"WHOA, REAGAN! Hold on there!" Officer Dave "Patty" Patterson yelled as he jumped out of the passenger side of the RMP before his rookie Annabel Anderson had even brought it to a full stop with lights flashing to block the travel lane behind the spot where the green Jeep was pulled to the side nearly up against the concrete barrier of the right-hand lane of the FDR where they had been called for the report of a disabled motorist and the inevitable traffic backlog that was created.

"I HATE THIS CAR! I HATE IT!" Eddie yelled with all the fury her five-two frame could muster at the time as she wound up to kick the back tire once more and was only spared repeating that previous mistake when Patterson managed to thwart her effort by grabbing her from behind and pulling her away at the last second so she only connected with air as they watched the vehicle spew copious amounts of steam into the frigid air from an apparent broken radiator that Danny had been trying to nurse along as far as possible. "LET ME GO, PATTY!"

"NO WAY! Not until you promise not to hurt yourself! Sergeant Reagan will have my ass busted to meter maid by tomorrow morning if I let that happen!" he warned as she continued to struggle against him while he was trying to be oh-so-careful of where he put his hands in consideration of her pregnant state. "Cripes, Eddie! What's going on here? Why do you have Detective Reagan's car? And what's happened to Sarge?" he asked as he marched her over to the other side safely away from the traffic and softened his grip on her arms as he felt her melt back against him while Annabel ran around the car to join them, ignoring the horns of the irritated motorists crawling by. "We've barely heard anything back at the house except that he broke his leg and had some surgery… no one's talking, and you're not on the street anymore. We all know something is up and I think Lieutenant Renzulli is going to authorize a stake out at your house soon if we don't get some answers!"

"Officer Reagan, please," Annabel urged as she looked on. "I know I'm just a rookie and I have no right to ask if it's personal, but something bad must have happened. He's my partner," she pleaded with obvious concern. "He hasn't returned any of my messages and didn't even yell at me after that whole 10-13 call. Today's my first day back after having the stitches out. I've been waiting to get chewed out for a week now. "

"Me too," Patterson admitted as he recalled his role in that whole near catastrophe even though he and Annabel had been commended for their actions… they both knew that their Sergeant would have a different viewpoint on how the incident had been initially approached.

"I know, and I'm really sorry about that guys. He lost his phone and hasn't needed it so I haven't even thought to replace it yet, but we also have to be careful because of the family," she revealed honestly. "This has to stay quiet, and I can't get into everything here. Jamie was hit by a car the day he went down to Washington and he's been in the hospital since… he… um, was hurt pretty bad and he's had four surgeries so far. We had him flown up to Columbia after the first two. That's where he is now, and visitors and communication there are really restricted, but he's finally out of bed for a little bit now, and we're hoping he might be able to come home for a few days at a time starting this weekend. He's going to be in full-time PT for a while though."

"Oh, no!" Annabel gasped as her hands flew to her face. "I mean 'oh no' that he was hurt so badly, not that he's coming home of course! What can we do to help?" she jumped right in as was her usual style. "I can start a list and round up volunteers for anything you need! Snow shoveling, groceries, home cooked meals, house cleaning, anything!"

"Thanks, but it's complicated," Eddie started while shaking her head. "There's so much going on I can't keep it straight, but the family has been able to help with everything, My mom is here and I really don't have time to even think about the rest," she sighed with a look at Danny's disabled Jeep and worried about an upset husband waiting anxiously for her right now. "Honestly, we've been able to handle it, but when he's home more I'm sure some visitors would really cheer him up, let me get your number and here's mine," she offered while writing it on Annabel's note pad. "I'll give you a call when I know he'll be able to see you. I'm really sorry I let you guys hang like that, but we've been trying to keep it out of the papers because of his dad… that'll just turn into a circus and we'll have reporters camped out at the hospital and following us," she apologized. "The only thing I need right now is a way to take care of this and get up to the Med Center to visit him. It's really important."

"I'll handle this, already called for a tow," Patterson advised. "I'll have them take it to my buddy's shop on Lex and 8th, he'll fix it up right away and get it back to you guys. Just give me the keys."

"What about driving her to North Manhattan right away?" Annabel asked. "Will Lieutenant Renzulli let us go out of service?"

"Probably not with this mess here to clean up before rush hour," Patterson reasoned as he looked at the bottleneck they were causing just as a lemon yellow four-door Mini Cooper pulled over to the side in front of the Jeep and RMP to join them. "Now what is this yahoo doing?" he sighed before a familiar tall, thin young man opened the passenger-side door and peeled his long legs out of the front seat before standing up.

"George?" Patterson and Eddie questioned in unison as her nose involuntarily twitched while the petite brunette driver exited the vehicle and quickly came alongside and grabbed his hand. "Addison?"

"Hi guys! See George, I told you it was them, silly! LOOK!" she gushed as she shook her left hand at them with great excitement and revealed a stunning diamond solitaire on her ring finger. "We just got back from Red Rocks in Sedona, Arizona and he proposed! ISN'T HE AWESOME?! Need any help? Eddie, were just on our way up to Columbia to see your hubby!"

* * *

 _An hour's ride stuffed into the backseat of a Mini Cooper with a post-engagement George Mahoy and Addison Greene will be a whole lot of awesomeness for Eddie to take before she finally makes it north for that discussion with Jamie focused on the ultrasound results and his hopeful homecoming which might just mean the boot for another one of our favorite OCs._


	59. Chapter 59

Chapter 59

"Oh, you've got to be… son of a… damn it! Can this effing day get any worse?" Danny mouthed in disbelief as he stood alone in the upstairs hallway of his house in Staten Island with his phone to his ear listening to the messages while rummaging around in the linen closet looking for the extra hot water bottle as Linda's back had started to tighten and she was feeling cramps already by the time they arrived home so she went directly to bed. What had her husband swearing to himself at that moment was the voicemail his sister-in-law had left informing him that his precious Jeep had erupted like Mount Vesuvius on the FDR and left her stranded on the side of the road in the cold while obviously on her way north towards her husband, which in his detective's mind could only mean that her appointment did not go well since she did not take the time to drive home first. A return call went straight to messages, indicating Eddie had probably arrived at her destination and had her phone confiscated so Danny left one of his own apologizing profusely before hanging up and coming to one foregone conclusion.

"Harvard's gonna kill me when he gets the chance! I'm gonna wind up in a ditch for sure!"

###

"HE DITCHED YOU?!"

"No, now Jamie, don't get upset, please!" Eddie pleaded with her husband as he just about forgot himself and was ready to jump to his feet in anger. "He must have been called away for an emergency; his phone is going right to voicemail. I told him outright that he didn't have to be there, and he did leave me his car!" she tried to settle him even over her own disappointment that Danny had abandoned her while purposefully trying at first to leave out an important fact that there had indeed been a backup plan that had been vehemently declined.

"Fat lot of good that piece of crap did you, Ed! You ended up stranded on the side of a busy highway on top of everything else today! He knows damn well that thing has been acting up lately! I asked him to be there in case you were upset, and he just left like that? How the hell am I supposed to feel?!" Jamie continued to struggle in his seat in a frustrated, agitated fashion. "Thank God Patty and Annabel stopped for you!"

"It wasn't just that, he did tell Dr. Geisner I should wait there and Erin would come pick me up," she admitted shamefully. "I wanted to get to you though, so I left and figured I'd drive myself."

"Erin told me she had court," Jamie rebutted. "I asked her first."

"Well... whatever; he tried then," she fluffed while trying to cover over the ongoing strife with her sister-in-law, which obviously was being reciprocated on the other end if Erin was willing to lie to her injured sibling in order to duck out on his request. "Please, don't start something with your brother over this," she begged. "Mostly it was my fault, anyway. I probably overdid it with the car too; I was in one of my Mario moods today," she admitted with a sheepish frown. "It worked out though; I'm here. Addie and George showed up at just the right time and gave me a ride, didn't they?" she paused and considered that hour spend stuffed sideways and twitching behind Addison while George's seat was pushed all the way back and her former rival spouted over every single solitary detail of the surprise engagement trip to Arizona. "Someone was watching out for me. Now please look at this," she added while carefully pulling a printout that the doctor had provided from her purse. "It's your daughter, Jamie… our new baby girl. She's the only thing other than Kaylin and you that's important enough for me to worry about today."

"Oh…" he paused with a deep breath as he stared with quiet intent for several moments at the picture that very clearly showed a high resolution familiar outline self-soothing while laying on her back. "She does sort of look like a Reagan already, doesn't she?" he sniffed and laughed a little while wiping a tear away from the corner of his eye. "More like me and Joe instead of Mom and Erin though, poor kid... no, I mean I'm kidding," he added while his arm was punched, albeit with less force than normal. "She's beautiful of course, Ed. Just like you."

"And she's gonna be just fine too, you know. Everything else is developing perfectly… Dr. Geisner said so, and this kidney thing could all go away when she gets a little bigger in there. Ninety percent fix themselves, Jamie. Those are pretty good odds," Eddie continued to try to convince her husband with the same argument she'd been using on herself for the past two hours. "And even if something like surgery is needed afterwards, that's in our favor too. It's gonna be okay, I know it."

"But Boston…" he continued. "She wouldn't have said that we might need to go there and see this other specialist if it was nothing to worry about though," he fretted. "She went right to the top… and I'm… Ed, no matter what I do it's still gonna be tough for me to go that far in another few weeks," he admitted.

"Well, we don't even know for sure if we need to go see this Dr. DePaula yet, and so did you, Jamie," Eddie reminded. "You looked for the very best place for this right away. Let's be glad she's on the same page because you wouldn't have settled for less. Have faith we're in the right hands and try to stay positive."

"I know… I'm sorry; I promise to try harder. It's just so damn frustrating to be stuck here while you have to deal with that alone… while Kaylin has to be at her practice and party without us. I won't even get to see her be an angel in church. I miss her so much," he broke with some more reserved self pity. "It's not fair. I feel like I'm letting everyone down all the time. I'm stressing you out. You heard what Dr. Geisner said… the baby feels all that, Ed. If she can tell when you're eating something sweet and if she likes it or not, and her emotions are already developing, she can tell when you're upset, and that's basically been every single minute since this happened. Maybe that's why things looked worse on the scan this time… it's hurting you and her, and that's all my fault."

"It's not, okay? Please don't do that… don't put it on yourself. You're doing everything you can to get well and stressing yourself out won't help any of us. We're going to do better with this, both of us. C'mon, you were so excited before about being able to get up today by yourself. Tomorrow you said Aaron would let you get into a wheelchair. We're gonna get you home soon… we need to focus on that. Stop blaming yourself, silly!"

"Silly? Seriously?" he puzzled at her unlikely word choice.

"Okay, so I spent an hour in the back of a lemon yellow Mini Cooper with the Wrigley's Doublemint gum twins and it must have rubbed off. They have news for you," she revealed with raised eyebrows, deliberately using whatever was in her arsenal to turn the conversation away from the topic at hand and more positive to settle him. "I had to swear three times that I wouldn't tell though."

"He finally did it?" Jamie instantly caught on with a small smile. "Good for you, George," he murmured.

"Oh, he did it… and wait until you hear where _they_ did it afterwards. I really had to bite my tongue not to remind them again exactly where I was coming from and why," she added as she put a hand on her tummy and gave him a smug look remembering precisely what had put them in this position in the first place. "You know how hard that is for me."

"I see that, Edit Katalin, considering you've pretty much spilled all the available beans, anyway."

"Oh, well, just so they don't end up with one too… can you imagine that? Our kids that close in age and growing up together after everything that's happened. And act surprised anyway. You'll hear all about it when they come in here after they're finished with Dr. Kenzie."

"10-4. Where is Addie, anyway?" he queried, his attitude already a bit lighter. "And George got in to see me, too? How'd he manage that one?"

"Oh, so we ran into Kenzie down in the lobby and I introduced Addison as your home RT, and she was all excited and babbling on and on about George and the ring and how nice it was and how he went overboard because he already got a big promotion down at CompStat, and then I had to explain what that was and Kenzie wanted to talk to him too because I guess she's having problems with the numbers in her FDA report that's due on Friday and she can't figure out where they're off. So Addie is signing her life away to get approval to torture you with that little blue ball thingy again, and I guess he might help out with the study too since he already has so many clearances from working at 1PP, and I told her that your dad would absolutely vouch for him… Jamie, are you okay?" she asked as just that quickly a sad shadow rolled across his face again as his emotions continued to run up and down.

"Yeah, no… I'm alright," he deflected as thoughts about his own future on the job clouded his feelings. "Just something to see everyone moving on… and doing so well," he admitted while considering his former rookie's new appointment and engagement in light of what his own big achievement for the week had been before their conversation was interrupted by a knock at the door.

###

"I don't get it, Dad... why do we have to go stay at Grandpa's house tonight? We can't go home first? Is something wrong with Mom's back again?" Jack questioned as he and Sean were summoned into Linda's car outside of their school after the last late dismissal bell before winter break as their father had broken all types of land speed records to get there on time. "And where's the Jeep? You hate driving this car."

"I had to let someone borrow it," Danny downplayed as the doors closed and seat belts clicked before he started off towards Bay Ridge instead of their own home. "Listen, I packed some of your usual stuff plus there's the clothes we keep there anyway, so you guys will be fine with Pop and Grandpa until tomorrow or so," he added before offering an account which he hoped would explain his wife's state without revealing what she desperately wanted to keep quiet. "Your mom got a little bad news she wasn't expecting on one of the tests she took. She's gonna be fine; nothing bad's gonna happen... that hasn't already," he assured quickly while muttering that last bit under his breath and checking out his son's faces in the rear view mirror to make sure they were buying into it. "She's just really disappointed that it didn't turn out the way she hoped it would so she could put that whole shooting thing behind her, but we found out it's best that bullet stays put where it is, and it really bummed her out because she has to be careful of it, okay? Once in awhile it might make her back sore like this and maybe she won't get to do all the things she wanted to because of it; that's all," he added truthfully without revealing the excruciating pain that reality was causing his wife at that very moment. "I just think she just needs the next day or so to be allowed to be sad about that before she'll feel like getting back to doing normal stuff and maybe her and I will do some counseling again, but it's not about us being together this time, so don't worry about that. We just need to figure out how to deal with this now. I know you guys are old enough to understand that sometimes we have to give people a little space to accept things."

"Like Uncle Jamie?" Jack asked. "We haven't even gotten to see him yet, and it's been forever since his accident."

"Well, sort of. Uncle Jamie's just been at a place you couldn't visit, but we're hoping with Mom's help he can come home for a bit this weekend. But yeah, it's gonna be really tough to see him like that though, boys," he warned. "He needs time to adjust too because he was hurt bad, and he's been through a lot so it'll be awhile until he's back to himself again."

"Just like Mom, right? I thought she was all better though. What kind of things did she want to do that she can't anymore?" Sean asked innocently. "Playing football at Thanksgiving? I gave her my trophy," he reminded. "So she wouldn't feel bad about being left out of the game."

"Yes, Sean… things exactly like that," Danny sighed in relief at that benign but truthful direction for his explanation. "They're both missing out on some family stuff they've always loved to do right now, and that's really hard especially around the holidays, so they're both kinda sad about it. We need to try to cheer them up... you don't know how important that is."

###

"Jamie Reagan, now what have you gone and done to yourself again, silly?" Addison Greene's chirpy voice carried in from the doorway as she stood there with a hand on her hip and an ever-present smirk on her face despite the situation. "I've been talking to your RT here, and she says you've been a 'reluctant patient'... I think that's how she put it. I told her she has no idea, but that's not gonna fly with me at home, buster, so just get that straight right now. I've dealt with you before."

"Hey, Addie," he responded with an easy smile and a twinkle in his eyes much to his wife's chagrin as she shook her head and carefully measured his response. Although Eddie was confident in her husband's love and fidelity, there was always that nagging notion that caused an involuntary twitch whenever this absolute reminder of his previous type entered the picture… a pretty, petite brunette just like Sydney and all his prior known flings had been. Still, it was a bit ironic that this over-the-top cheery one had proven to be a little too much for him to handle while the more timid, phobic George had apparently won her heart in the end with his former TO's blessing and intervention to put the two together.

"So did Eddie spill?" Addie nearly burst with excitement after she got her warning out of the way. "Oh, I know she did!" she continued as she flashed the ring and popped into the room with enthusiasm before coming up to give him a gentle hug and kiss on the cheek. "You have a terrible poker face," she pronounced as she read him like a book with a narrowing eye and some concern at his slightly subdued response.

"It's really great news," Jamie offered as he did his best to stay upbeat even though the events of the day had taken their toll and he found himself tiring and sliding backwards a little. "I'm really happy for you guys and proud of George for manning up. Eddie said he took you out to Sedona?"

"Yes, I thought he was just being a goofball when he bought the tickets for my birthday because he knows how much I always wanted to go climbing out there at Red Rocks, but he took lessons for months behind my back and we did a bunch of smaller stuff to start, then on the third day he hired a guide and everything to take us on a climb all the way to the top of this breathtaking sandstone tower called Earth Angel… you've never seen a place so beautiful before in your life! It was over seven hundred feet of rock climbing to get to the top," she bounced as Jamie's stomach did the same with a flop and spin while it sank at the thought as he recalled her enthusiasm for repelling and everything related. "Then once we finally got up there, the guide stayed back and left us completely alone surrounded three hundred and sixty degrees by just sheer drop-offs and the most brilliant clear sky... I turned around and George was down on one knee," she gushed as her eyes danced and she hawked the ring once more. "WASN'T THAT TOTALLY AWESOME?!"

"Totally," Jamie nodded with wide eyes at the thought, fairly certain that apart from a guide pulling him up bodily as drugged dead weight that he would have been anywhere else but down at the bottom of the canyon losing his lunch instead of on bended knee no matter what his intentions were. "I guess my fireworks at the ocean were a little tame by comparison," he coughed out to his wife.

"Ah, no… they were perfect, lambchop. I love the beach and you don't see me hanging off the sides of cliffs either," Eddie assured.

"Oh, well that's what we had to do after!" Addie continued her enthusiastic tale. "It took three separate rappelling drops to get to the bottom because we were so high up! And then we hiked over to a plateau and George had a picnic supper all set up with champagne and chocolate strawberries with blankets and everything so we could watch the sun go down in the most gorgeous magenta skyline I've ever seen before the stars came out and he started a fire! Didn't you, honey?" she asked as her betrothed had sheepishly joined them and was now trying to figure out a way to derail his new fiancé's final spurt of details before she left nothing to the imagination. "I'll never forget a single solitary second, it was the best night ever!"

"I think they probably get the picture, Ads. Maybe that's enough about us," George interrupted as he slipped behind her and circled her waist gently with a hug and tried to tone her down before turning his attention back to his former partner and his current plight. "Hey, Sarge," he added with pity and definite concern now evident as he looked over. "I'm sorry for what happened… Commissioner Reagan filled me in a little when he called to see if Addie would be willing to stop in and help out when you were at home. He didn't even have to ask… you know we'd do anything. I owe you so much… if it wasn't for you sticking with me, I don't know where I'd be today."

"S'okay, George," Jamie assured with a somewhat sad resolve. "I know it seems pretty bad right now, but I'm getting better, okay?" he tried to sound convincing as it felt like his old boot was rattled and looking towards him for reassurance once more, just like he had always done when they were on the street together. "Really appreciate you both coming today, and can't thank you enough for picking Ed up and bringing her."

"It's true," Eddie added, quickly pushing aside any reservations ever held against Addison in her desire to have her husband home. "We're so thankful for your help. Having him back with us means everything."

"Dr. MacKenzie was explaining some of the basics about her study to us," George continued as he allowed himself to take a another quick glance at Jamie's leg. "Pretty cutting edge stuff," he admitted with worry. "She's asked me to come back tomorrow to see if I can help her with her FDA report. Somehow the numbers she's put into the computer are accurate, but they seem a bit skewed off where they should be in the results. It's gonna take me a while to figure it out… there must be a flaw in one of the algorithms the program is using. I guess she's got to get her investor's approval first though."

"Well good luck with that," Eddie snorted. "Sorry, don't care for the guy," she added before the remainder of their visit continued focused on Jamie's homecoming before the new couple took their leave.

###

"Hey, sorry to interrupt, but did he tell you? He's moving up in the world… or at least around in it a little more," Jamie's physical therapist, Aaron, announced enthusiastically as he walked in the room shortly after Addie and George left while pulling a few papers out of the stack of folders he was carrying. "Since we're getting closer to that home discharge I thought I'd just give you some of the recommendations I have so we make that time away as safe and productive as possible. You'll need to agree to these and sign off before being released. Now, we'll see how it goes but hopefully we'll get you out of here Saturday afternoon so you can be there for Santa, yeah? We might be pushing it a little, but I know you want to be with the family for the big day so we'll play it by ear after that. Like I told your wife, we can't get crazy with bending that knee too much with the amount of staples and stitches still in there so this week between the holidays we'll try to keep you home as much as possible as long as everything works out with the RN and RT you're lining up for care. You're like a ten minute drive from my house so it's no biggie to stop in every morning to get what's needed done on the PT end, and then we'll start to hit it hard here in the rehab room and gym starting after the first of the year, okay?"

"Sure," Jamie agreed with a less-than-convinced sigh considering zero sensation had returned to his lower leg yet as he scanned the first page, skipping over some of the suggested supplies at the bottom that he had no intention of using, anyway. "I think Ed and my dad already took care of all this," he answered as he handed it over to his wife.

"We did, all the big stuff anyway," Eddie admitted as she noted the same few sorts of personal admissions that had caught Jamie's eye. "The bed, handholds and wheelchair are already at the house and my mom is taking care of the ramp. She texted earlier and said it will be in place by Friday. Some of these other things though, I mean, will he really need them if he's able to use the bathroom downstairs all on his own? We had it completely remodeled for him; it's totally accessible now."

"At night, in the beginning especially, it wouldn't hurt to have them handy because it's really important for him to stay hydrated and that necessitates, well... more trips which can be tiring at this stage. It's best to be prepared," Aaron advised as Jamie blushed in embarrassment with the thought of his wife or God forbid his mother-in-law having to help him with such needs.

"Okay, then I'll stop and pick everything that's left up on the way home… when I figure out exactly how I'm gonna get there," Eddie admitted as she considered the fact that she was without transportation. "I guess I'll see if your dad was planning on a visit today or maybe I can cab it to 1PP before he leaves and bum a ride from there. What else is left, Jamie?" she demanded as she watched him shaking his head as he reviewed the rest of the guidelines.

"It says here right after no steps… no pets?" he puzzled. "We have a cat; he's my daughter's best friend. He stays, non-negotiable," he added with concern and then ire at the situation once more while he watched Eddie waffle. "I can't tell her Bear has to leave! He'll be fine!"

"Well, with a cat it's kind of a two-way safety problem there," Aaron advised. "On one hand they're a tripping issue and we absolutely have to avoid falls at all costs for you right now between your spleen injury and leg. A lot of times they'll avoid you or treat you like a stranger because it takes a while to lose that hospital smell and to be scent recognizable again. Then when you get there, they tend to linger around your wheelchair and you always have to be careful moving or backing up. A broken tail or leg on kitty could be another disaster that you just don't need. I'm afraid I can't sign you out otherwise."

"Jamie, maybe he's right; if Bear treats you like a stranger..." Eddie warned and considered their wily cat's propensity for those ninja-like twenty-pound propelled bounce attacks. "We could be in real trouble. He's knocked grown men down before… I mean thank God, that time with Quinlan..." she trailed off. "Kaylin will understand if we tell her he just has to stay at Grandpa's house for a while."

"Oh, sure… she's three and just supposed to understand that," Jamie argued back in defeat as he could see by his wife's set look if it came down to a choice between Bear, no matter how much he was beloved, or her husband coming home, well there was only going to be one winner there... still he protested. "What if he runs away from them and tries to come home like before and something happens to him? She thinks it's the baby's fault that I got hurt in the first place and she's supposed to get the fact that her daddy's so freaking helpless now that we have to take her cat away too!"

"And what happens if he makes you fall, Jamie, and you mess your leg up more or wind up bleeding to death on our living room floor because of your spleen?" Eddie challenged with an edge in her voice that was in no way, shape or form to be denied. "How am I supposed to explain that one to her? Huh? It's not going to happen. Final answer. He stays at your dad's house for the next week and then he can come home after that and only go there on the weekends when you're with us. I will explain to Kaylin that this is just one more thing that we all need to learn to live with _temporarily,"_ she emphasized. "It'll be fine."

"FINE!" Jamie snapped back and shoved the paper over at her. "Here, you can read the rest. Apparently I need all kinds of warm stuff to wear because sitting around on my butt all day is gonna give me the chills, and it also says anger is often a byproduct of prolonged pain and discomfort, and to be prepared for that. Guess I've got that one covered too!"

* * *

 _Well, things are slowly falling in place for Jamie to come home, but at this point Eddie might just consider leaving him at the hospital, lol. Poor boy. Next, the big day is right around the corner, but first Danny and Linda visit with a few more well wishers stopping to check in, but not before one of our bad guys has a little fun in taking away some of the Christmas cheer the Reagan family so desperately needs at this time._


	60. Chapter 60

Chapter 60

"Frank"

That single word uttered in a familiar dreaded tone was enough to turn the Commissioner's blood cold early that Friday morning before he even looked up from his desk to zero in on an ashen and apologetic Garrett Moore now standing in front of him and out of breath after the run up from his office.

"They have it," his somewhat redeemed DCPI, or so he thought, continued to stutter out. "All of them. Some source anonymously leaked information on Jamie's accident and current whereabouts to all the major media outlets, only they listed him as _likely_ after all this time and have the family on some kind of pre-Christmas death watch at his bedside. I can't refute it fast enough," he added anxiously as he glanced at his phone now buzzing incessantly before walking over to the window to look down. "It's already going viral."

"SON OF A BITCH!" Frank thundered as his hand slammed down on the desk, rattling the woodwork and causing Detective Baker to rush into the room from her station. "TODAY? The day before he's finally supposed to come home?! They'll be camped out on his lawn now no matter what we say! We won't be able to get him in the house without the photographers hanging out of every tree. They'll all see how bad..." he stopped himself while shaking his head and considering the setback this would be for his media-shy and now fragile-looking son. "It'll be in every paper."

"Damn vultures are already circling the satellite trucks down there," Garrett added with a nervous glance to the street as he walked to the window. "We need to have a press conference to try to rein this in. They'll be at Columbia by now too… and they just caught Linda and Danny on their way into the hospital looking upset," he confirmed with another look to his device as he flashed a picture of the couple holding each other as they walked in the front of the building and he ran his hand through his gray hair in frustration. "That's gonna confirm their angle on this. I'm so sorry, Frank, but you're going to have to come out personally and make some sort of statement to knock down the fire and put up a smokescreen, and the sooner the better… I can't stand up there for you otherwise it won't prove anything, and we're really behind the eight-ball on this."

"Again you mean! Get a statement ready… downstairs in the pressroom, ONE HOUR!" Frank barked as he reached for his phone to start making calls to the family to warn them even as it started ringing on its own with an ID from his oldest showing.

###

"Dad already knows," Danny edged as he hung up and looked over his shoulder at the growing throng outside while he and Linda cleared the first line of bio defense downstairs and headed into the elevator for the ride up to Dr. Kenzie's floor. "Garrett said someone leaked a story to all the press outlets this morning that Jamie was here on his deathbed and that we're all hovering now and waiting for the Commissioner's youngest son to die on Christmas Eve. Now they have pictures of us coming in together so it looks like it's true," he stressed with his arm still around her shoulder where it had been virtually non-stop for the last two days while they fought to get over the shock of Dr. Geisner's office visit together.

"Oh, Danny, not now! What about your brother, did he hear?" Linda asked nervously as they stepped in before the doors closed. "He hates this kind of stuff… it'll send his blood pressure right through the roof! Maybe they won't release him! Eddie's gonna flip!"

"No, Dad had Baker call up there while he was on the line with me. Eddie's at work already and she's stuck inside the precinct… he already talked to her so she's fine, and Jamie's having some kind of procedure to put a chest port in this morning… what's that?" he puzzled while anxiously thinking it was more like the painful tube that was inserted through his ribcage in to keep the lung from collapsing. "He's not due to come back to his room for about forty-five minutes so the nurse said to keep the television off and the remote away from him after that until we can get a handle on this. They've already got a press conference scheduled at 1PP for the top of the hour."

"It's minor surgery with mostly local anesthesia," Linda advised with a heavy sigh as she struggled once more to keep herself pulled together. Having the peace of a quiet household for the past two days to vent her emotions as they came had helped tremendously to deal with the loss, but she looked drawn and sickly, and was feeling a little detached out in public once more. "A small self-healing rubber balloon-looking thing the size of a quarter called a septum is slipped under the skin of his upper chest and attached to a catheter that's threaded into one of the large central veins which empties into the heart. Cancer patients have them for chemo," she explained. "That way he can have his blood drawn or drugs and antibiotics given IV without all the discomfort of having more needle sticks and I'll be able to use it when he's at home. It lowers the risk of infection since it's only a onetime small incision, but there's probably a big bubble-type dressing on it now if they were planning on starting today or tomorrow. It's safe, doesn't hurt and can stay in there for a long time, don't worry about it."

"Okay," Danny sighed in relief as he grabbed her hand once more when the doors opened. "Listen, we shouldn't say anything to Jamie… right? I mean Dad said to wait until he handles things with the press and I've already pissed the kid off enough for one week," he added with a sigh knowing that the apology he offered over the phone for letting Eddie down had likely not yet been taken to heart by his brother. "Neither one of them said anything yet… but I think something went wrong at their appointment too. He should have really laid into me, but he didn't… he was quiet and then all he said when I asked was that they're still keeping an eye on things and she has to go back again in two weeks."

"Danny," his wife sighed in defeat as she just didn't have it in her to deal with someone else's baby drama at this time, no matter how callous that seemed at the moment. "Hiding things didn't seem to work out so well between us, did it?…" she trailed off, too mentally exhausted to cope with anything.

"Well, Grandma Betty always said a family is held together by its secrets," he quipped sadly as he looked at his wife's state. "Not sure she was right about that one though. Seems like that's all everyone's been doing lately and the family's never felt further apart."

"I know and I'm sorry, Danny. Just… just do whatever you think," she added. "I'm trying but… I don't know what to say… right now I just can't be wrapped up in all that."

"Linda, wait," he tugged her back for a second before they went to the security desk. "Honey, I'm sorry for bringing it up. I know that being out around everyone, especially Jamie and Eddie so early is going to be hard for you," he worried and leaned in for a hug. "Thank you for helping my brother come home though," he whispered in her ear before brushing her cheek with a typical Danny Reagan sweet talking kiss.

"Well, I have to, don't I? It's not like I have a choice..." she asked irritably and considered the always consuming family obligation before feeling guilty about having those thoughts when her brother-in-law and his family were facing such circumstances. "Maybe you're right, and doing something for someone else will make me feel better and get my mind off other things," she agreed sadly since the byproduct of the loss had hit hard and heavy that morning just like she had been warned which made their cover story all the more believable since the cramping continued in spite of medication. "I don't know what else to do with myself right now. We're just going to say that my back had another spasm and I called you, right? That's why you left Eddie at the doctor's office like that… it's the truth pretty much," she admitted sadly. "Jamie will accept that, and it's not like the way I look right now doesn't back it up," she added with a sniff. "I'm surprised they let me through downstairs."

"Yeah, that's pretty much what I told the guy at the desk… that you were having back problems. No temp so he said you could come in. That's the story we'll go with," he agreed. "I already explained as much when I called to apologize to both of them the other day and see where my car ended up. Somehow I've gotta get over there and pick it up next week."

"So who do you think did this?" Linda wondered and deflected to a new topic with a nod to the ground and the reporters gathered down there as they hurried across the walkway to Jamie's ward after handing over their phones at the desk. "Who else really knows now, especially where he is? You don't think it was George or Addie? What about Annabel? That girl can talk the paint off the wall," she griped knowingly. "You said she was with that other officer from Jamie's precinct that stopped when the Jeep overheated, maybe it was him?"

"I don't know, Lin," Danny answered. "I honestly can't imagine it would be any of them though… they're all Jamie's friends."

"Well, I didn't tell anyone, did you?"

"I…" Danny paused as his answer caught in his throat when he considered the one outsider he had just trusted with the news… an old partner who knew all the intimate details about the Blue Templar and was completely disenfranchised with the whole NYPD while perhaps looking to even the score after being mentally fried and pushed out herself. _Surely Jackie would have never betrayed him this way?_... he quickly pushed that notion aside as utter paranoia and finished. "I never told anyone who would do this to us."

"Just seems like someone has a grudge and the timing was deliberate to ruin Jamie's homecoming and Christmas for us," Linda huffed and shook her head. "Not like we needed much help for that this year," she added.

"Yeah, almost like they…. planned it," her husband avowed as that nagging feeling that had been swept aside for a few days by a personal tragedy came flooding back once more at full force as the pair decided to sit in the cafe down the hall from Jamie's room and watch the PC's press conference there while waiting for the unsuspecting subject of the brouhaha to be returned before dealing with the latest crisis affecting him.

###

DCPI Garrett Moore solemnly sidestepped the familiar podium in the briefing room at 1PP which he had been dis-invited from and took his place to the right instead along with Detective Abigail Baker and Lieutenant Gormley before a stone faced PC swept into the room and walked up to the microphone. The forewarned throng of reporters remained respectfully silent as he started.

"I will not be taking any questions at the conclusion of this conference," Frank spoke clearly into the microphone but his voice and body language was rife with an obvious anger as he paused and gathered himself, deciding to go off his DCPI's hastily prepared script and out on his own. "I'm here to address the reports that surfaced this morning regarding my youngest son, NYPD Sergeant Jamison Reagan," he began evenly before pausing to push his glasses back and shift his weight as he leaned over the podium. "If there is one thing this Commissioner will never understand, no matter how many years I have behind me, it is the insatiable need for the press, including the members sitting in this very room, to use any sort of half truth as an excuse to inflict further hardship on a person or a family just because of who they are related to or what their last name might be in the almighty need to be first to the press with something, even if it's not true. It is a testament to the sort of uncaring, unprofessional click bait that passes all too often for real journalism these days. Since none of you bothered with ascertaining the facts from this office before you ran with this nonsense, let me present them to you," he commanded with a glowering look as he reached down in a file and picked up a glossy department photo.

"Uh oh," Garrett mouthed as he could see his boss had clearly left the reservation.

"This is Sergeant Reagan… my youngest son Jamie," Frank announced as he brandished the photo. "You will all be provided with a copy of this before you leave. He is a decorated member of this department, having received his latest recognition, a Commendation for Community Service for his work on establishing a committee focused on bettering the NYPD and FDNY's response to EDP calls in this city just the day before his accident took place. That's why he was in Washington in the first place… to present, along with others, the good that has been done here by a dedicated volunteer group to make things a little easier for others in crisis. He's also a loving father, husband, son, grandson, uncle, brother, mentor and friend to many others. It is a pity that you, and those like you, in your zeal to sensationalize things could not follow that example and did nothing more than to cause him, and all those others listed by extension, more distress. The facts, in case you are interested in them are in a nutshell: on Wednesday, December 7th, at approximately 7:39, my son was struck by a hit-and-run driver in in the crosswalk by his hotel in Washington DC. There are no credible leads to the driver's identity and the MPDC have basically written it off as a cold case. Jamie had internal injuries and a badly broken leg at the scene. He was taken by ambulance to Capital Regional Hospital for initial care and then flown up to the Columbia Medical Center campus here in New York City later in the week where he's received further treatment including surgery to stabilize the fractures. To borrow from Mark Twain, the reports of his imminent death have been greatly exaggerated," Frank paused as he deliberately scoped up and down the room once more to emphasize his next point and silence any and all questions.

"Go, sir," Baker encouraged under her breath.

"Through the grace of God and the talents and dedication of a superb medical staff led by his surgeon, Dr. Charlotte MacKenzie, who happened to be in DC through good fortune at that time and was recommended to us for a second opinion, Jamie is scheduled to come home for the first time tomorrow at three o'clock and will be able to spend Christmas Eve and Day with his family including his wife and young three-year-old daughter… my _granddaughter,"_ Frank emphasized with another hanging pause and a deep breath expelled through his nose. "A very special young lady who should be able to go outside and welcome her father home for the first time in two weeks without a media circus on the street outside her house to frighten her. Jamie will be driven home in whatever vehicle can accommodate him, he'll be helped into a wheelchair since that's what he requires until his leg heals, and he'll be brought into his house on a _temporary_ ramp that's been installed for that purpose… hardly newsworthy. Now, you have the facts and a photo of my son, so that should be sufficient to redact those ridiculous stories you put out earlier. Tomorrow, I promise you if I spot one camera on the street… if after all of this anyone here wants to take that homecoming moment away from a family and a little girl on Christmas Eve, you are on notice that I will personally call you out, not as the Police Commissioner, but as a father and grandfather. We respectfully ask for privacy. My DCPI will handle anything further; that will be all," he finished with a nod to his staff as he turned heel and left the room. "We're done here."

"That was ballsy," Gormley whispered to his cohorts. "He went with the straight truth… told them exactly when Jamie would be coming home and just about challenged them to show up. 'Scuse me, I think I need to make a few calls," he added before hurrying off.

"That was definitely no accident," Baker agreed with a pensive look as she considered her boss's actions before pursing her lips. "I need to go speak to the Commissioner," she added before following Gormley out and leaving Garrett alone to face the music and step up to the microphone with a definite sense he had better earn his keep this time.

"DCPI Moore! What type of clinic does Dr. MacKenzie run? Who is funding her study?"

"Why is Sergeant Reagan..."

###

"Orange?" came the worried inquiry from a concerned older sibling as he rejoined Linda in the room and nosily lifted the collar of Jamie's gown to peer in at the newest addition to the number of surgical sites on his body after his still somewhat lightly sedated brother had been settled back in his bed and his wife had joined Marguerite and William behind closed doors to learn the necessary protocols for his care at home. Linda was right, that weird bubbly adhesive wrap on Jamie's chest with a line sticking out of it was bizarre, but no more so than the colorful array of skin tones around the area, all the way up to the chin. "What is this stuff? He looks like he tried to OD on that self-tanning crap," he whispered.

"M'm not deaf... can hear you," came the groggy reply as a pair of hazel eyes opened and a hand reached up clumsily to push him back. "Leave me 'lone, D'nny… go 'way, m'm too tired to play. 'Sides," he offered with a glance at his sister-in-law. "Linda looks worse than me; take 'er home."

"Jamie, I told you I'm okay... my back's still bugging me," Linda guiltily replied with somewhat of a white lie. "And that's just the antiseptic they prepped him with, it'll wash off," she explained although she too was concerned and a little overwhelmed with the degree of care that her brother-in-law was going to require from her. There was a reason that healthcare workers were supposed to excuse themselves from treating close friends and relatives and right now she couldn't determine if her stomach was threatening to revolt because of her personal circumstances or the fact that she had just finished getting a primer on the proper way to care for Jamie's leg and had her first unfettered view of all that had been done. "It makes the port insertion look worse than it is."

"Everything looks bad, doesn't it?" he sighed with embarrassment at having a member of the family view his current state. "M'm like Frankenstein…"

"I thought you said they used mostly local for that," Danny continued to pester anyway on his current thought train. "Why'd they dope him up again?"

"Because…" Linda started as her abdomen clenched again with a strong cramp. "I need to go to the ladies' room, Danny," she finished with a tight, tearful whisper as she turned and hurried out of the room and down the hall, passing a familiar face who had been granted free access to the area since the two Marines with more minor procedures had already moved on leaving the ward nearly empty once again with no new surgical patients before the holidays and a buddy deemed less intensive.

"Because why?" Danny sighed as he watched her rush off and cursed the fact that he had been forced to ask her to come here in the first place today of all days. The past few weeks had been one thing after the next and he was finding his tolerance running near empty. "Damn it!"

"Cause I didn't feel like bein' awake while they cut me and shoved something else through my chest," Jamie answered bluntly instead a few moments later when he opened his eyes again as his senses returned once more while the now well-tuned dosage of shorter-acting drugs wore off on schedule and a rather urgent sensation took over. He tried to push himself up before reaching for the overhead bar for help; it was now or never and after a day of what felt like the ultimate freedom where he had been able to take care of his own needs for an entire afternoon, there was no going back. "Ow… great, the one arm I had that didn't hurt. Seriously?!" he griped in frustration as in spite of the local anesthesia for the procedure an increasing level of soreness was spreading through his shoulder and he attempted to use his left side for the first time before managing the task with a bit of struggle as Danny hovered over him and tried to help by pushing the button to make the bed more upright.

"Maybe you shouldn't be doing that yet!" his older sibling chastised. "You just woke up! At least wait until I go get one of the other nurses that was just in here!"

"Try laying in this bed for two weeks and see what you're willing to do to get out of it," Jamie huffed as he eyed the new addition wheelchair folded up out of reach in the corner. "C'mon, I need that."

"I don't think so."

"I _know_ so, Danny," Jamie warned with a stubborn, knowing look to the bathroom door.

"It's not happening until the doc gives you the okay… not on my watch. You're obviously not ready kid; you're too weak and you're gonna fall or something. Besides you have alternatives," his older brother advised with an equally leading glance at the clear plastic container conveniently stashed within reach on the side of the bed.

"Don't _ever_ tell him he's not strong enough and has to stay in that bed if he doesn't want to," a low, glowering voice came from the doorway and Danny spun around to find Quincy sitting in his own chair glaring up at him. "He knows what he's capable of."

"Excuse me?! Who the hell are you?" Danny growled as his ire was raised by someone deliberately inserting themselves in Reagan brother business which simply wasn't allowed, no matter who they were, although he attempted to tone down any further biting comments out of respect for the man's state. "This is _my_ little brother we're talking about here."

"And I'm a guy that's been where he is. Let him be his own judge, and trust him; he's not a kid. Ice knows how close he is to getting home… he's not gonna screw that up by takin' a face plant today, right?" Quincy challenged as he rolled himself further into the room and deftly now transferred himself into the recliner before pushing his chair over to Jamie's bed with his good leg. "Go ahead, use my ride. I'm gettin' promoted back to crutches anyway now that I'm off the pain meds and my balance is gettin' better."

"Ice?" Danny snorted as he stared the former SEAL down anyway as his Marine pride bristled back. "Now, let's get this straight, everyone else calls him Harvard for a reason. Quit playing reindeer games with him and putting ideas in his head that don't belong there!" he added as he felt a sudden familiar tightness come up into his own chest as a purposefully suppressed image of a gravely injured teenager with sandy brown hair laying on the bloody ground flashed in front of him once more and caused his heart to beat out of sorts. "He's _not_ a soldier!" Danny hissed in a thinly concealed mini anxiety attack as he tried unsuccessfully to push that back in the void once more which did not go unnoticed by the other man who narrowed his eyes in recognition at the familiar emotions crossing his adversary's face. "My peace-love-and-happiness brother's _NOT_ one of us, and he NEVER will be!"

"Thanks for the favor, Quince," Jamie gritted as in his determination he missed his older sibling's uncharacteristic display of nerves entirely and reached over with his left arm and pulled the chair closer, honestly shaking from the effort, but resolute not to falter now that he felt he was making a stand in front of a doubting brother… especially one that had not been totally forgiven for the oopsie at Dr. Geisner's office the other day, although out of consideration to Linda, he had decidedly resolved not to relive that conflict in front of her. Since she was out of the room, however… well that opened the door for a little snark anyway as he gripped the bar once more and eyed his next move. "At least I can count on _you."_

"What's _that_ supposed to mean?" Danny gaped at his brother's brazen attitude and willingness to ignore his direction. "Kid, I already explained what happened there to you… Linda…"

"Focus," Quincy advised as he likewise tuned out the older Reagan as if he wasn't even in the room. "Remember what I told you before… chunk it, man. Your goal is to get home to your family tomorrow, but right now only think about the task you're doing at this moment. Get your hands set right to lift… and if you're giving a hundred and fifty percent and it ain't gonna happen, then there's no shame in being a sugar cookie as long as you're putin' it forward and come back later when it will. Okay?"

"Yeah," Jamie huffed as he took a deep breath and despite some doubts decided to go on faith anyway, successfully pivoting into the seat and ending with his braced leg still neatly propped up on the side of the bed, although he instantly paled as the movement unleashed a sudden bolt of pain which traveled up the core of his femur into his hip. "Gonna be sick," he gasped as Quincy knowingly handed the emesis basin over just in time and after a few moments of heaving the injured ribs joined the chorus and it was obvious something else was going to have to be taken care of from where he was sitting once more. "Guess I need to do it here anyway," he admitted with a heavy grimace.

"Well, _that_ was certainly worth risking everything for, genius," Danny frowned and shook his head at that damn Reagan stubbornness rearing its ugly head once more as he stepped closer and handed over the needed item from the other side of the bed.

"It sure was," Quincy grinned at the mission accomplished as he pulled over the folded wheelchair from the corner by the recliner and slipped into it instead. "No rolling in the sand for you today. I can see you need some privacy. Catch you later, Ice. I gotta go check in on Commander Rigs… he's got some kinda bug or something… nurse said he had a fever this morning so they've got him locked down in isolation and hooked to all kinds of stuff for at least three days so he's madder than hell. I gotta talk to him through the glass, but he wanted me to come check on you and report back though considering it was all over the news today that you were on your way out," he revealed and left Jamie to puzzle over that comment before a glance at Danny's expression of disbelief and guilt unmasked the fact that something had indeed happened… with an obvious intention to shelter him from it once more. "Good to see that's not the case. Your Pop's got stones for standing up for you like that in front of the whole city. I'll come back for my ride later," he advised before backing out of the room and taking his leave down the hall.

"DANNY!" Jamie hissed when the two were alone once more. "Now what's going on?" he demanded with a seething glare that was born of utter frustration with the game of hide the truth his own family had been playing with him as of late. "Spill!"

* * *

 _So Mason is digging lower in that mean old bag of tricks he has with the intention of keeping up with his fun, and maybe we got a tiny little glimpse there from Danny of what's behind his PTSD which will continue to ramp up as the stressors mount. Next, one of the other bad guys in this installment, or is he?... comes out of the woodwork again to reveal the real reason for his presence before Jamie finally departs Columbia for a much-anticipated homecoming and Oliver Wendell wigs out on Kenzie for the unwanted attention this has all brought to his study._


	61. Chapter 61

Chapter 61

"CHARLOTTE!" Oliver Wendell's expected nasally high-pitched hiss greeted the doctor as she finished her Friday mid-afternoon rounds and returned to her office. "What in the name of hell is going on here today?!" he demanded and purposefully closed the door before going further. "The Police Commissioner is on every TV screen in the city spouting off about the study in press conferences when we have confidentiality clauses in effect, and now there are throngs of reporters outside snooping around and at my corporate headquarters upstate asking about the lease we hold here!"

"Commissioner Reagan made no mention of his son being in the study, only that I was his doctor and that he was treated here. Had he not cut them short by revealing that there would have been many more questions and it would have looked like we were hiding something. Should anyone ask me, I can defer to patient confidentiality now," she reminded. "I spoke to him earlier, and he assured me that the press on this would likely dissipate by tomorrow when Sergeant Reagan is scheduled to go home for the week between the holidays. There isn't much else to report and nothing obvious that relates to our work, he simply appears to have a broken leg from the outside view and I _am_ a board-certified orthopedic surgeon."

"And that is fine with you too!" Wendell frowned with increasing frustration. "You are allowing him a greater risk of infection and re-injury. Need I remind you how vitally important it is to this work that as the first trauma entry he has a positive outcome?! You seem willing to risk that for no other reason than to let him go home and play daddy! We cannot afford to be nice when we've already dropped another subject this week and your surgical ward is completely empty right now! _Nothing_ is getting done!" he railed. "We need more data before the process is approved and that will not happen without more testing!"

"It's the holidays," she reminded. "Staffing is lower and the critical care nurses needed some downtime, plus those potential subjects wanted to be at home with their families. There are two more coming in the following week from California. That other one was lost to to exigent circumstances. We knew that was a possibility going in given his history."

"Then why is he still here using up valuable resources?"

"He _is_ a valuable resource, and you already know the answer to that question, Oliver… it was a caveat that was agreed to when you hired me and it's non-negotiable. There was no hope that an implanted matrix would succeed given the diagnosis so as a case he needed to be excluded, but he will remain at the clinic under my care. All the relevant information has been included in my status report."

"Which has not been released, and it is due today no later than five o'clock! There are deadlines which must be met! I checked with our contact at the FDA earlier and you have not yet submitted the required report!"

"It's ready, in fact I was just coming in here to review it one final time before sending it on. As I told you the other day, I noticed what seemed like a slight aberration in the calculations that were processed earlier this week," she reported while turning to sit at her desk and failed to notice her investor's sudden stiffened stance at that revelation. "The final number sets were skewed. Commissioner Reagan was kind enough to allow George Mahoy, one of his top department statisticians to spend yesterday afternoon reviewing the program algorithms… you approved it Wednesday."

"And he located the… I mean he found an error?" Wendell gasped as he had never counted on anyone reviewing that particular bit of the process, nor did he realize that his had not been the only purposeful tampering done in an effort produce tainted results. "I thought you said he was only going to calculate the acceptable deviation to be included in the index. That program itself is proprietary!" he exploded. "I had it developed solely for use in this study!"

"And it's only as good as the statistics it spits back out!" Kenzie insisted, taken aback by his outburst even given his normal radical temperament. "He found a minor programming error and corrected it… two of the numbers in some incredibly long sequence were transposed. It's noted in the update I sent to you before I started my rounds. He had no access to the research data and has more security clearances than I do… FBI, Homeland, you name it," she added. "I thought you would be pleased, Oliver... it actually improved the forecasted success rate slightly. The more thorough we are in our reports, the better for the study."

"Wait, it _improved_ the outlook?" The investor puzzled as he jumped to his feet and began to pace back and forth in front of her desk as he contemplated the ramifications of that unexpected result. "You're sure?"

"Of course," she answered. "This is good news, isn't it?"

"We'll see," was the only reply she received before the irate little man turned and took his leave in a huff with no further explanation.

###

"Alright, sweetie… today's the big day! We have to take Bear over for his vacation at Pop Pop's house now so that Mommy can go to the hospital and bring Daddy home. He's going to be so excited to see you! Where are you, baby?" Eddie called out enthusiastically on Saturday morning as she set the retrieved empty pet carrier down on the floor by the front door and began an active search through the house for Kaylin knowing that it was likely the little girl had taken to one of her favorite hiding spots behind or underneath something as news of her four-legged friend's imminent exile had not gone over well no matter how her mother had tried to prepare her or spin it.

"Mom, did you see where she went?" Eddie asked as she peeked behind the couch before kneeling down on the floor to look under the coffee table.

"No, my lány, but that állat ran upstairs a few minutes before. Perhaps she is trying to hide him under the covers in her room as you did whenever you misbehaved and we threatened to take away your nyuszi."

"That was a stuffed bunny, and besides, what ever happened to Thumper?"

"In Rochester there is a box with some of your favorite things," Eva revealed. "Once I move to New York, you can sort through it. Perhaps Kaylin or the baby would like some of them."

"You kept him all this time?"

"Of course, he was your favorite," her mother chided with a slight smile as she remembered. "You slept with him every night until you left for school, and you would have cried as much without him. I believe it is not wise to take away her cica, Edit… the last two weeks have been difficult enough. She feels comfort with him. There have been too many changes for her already."

"I know that, Mom, but I have to," Eddie admitted as she sighed in temporary defeat and plopped down on the couch instead of continuing her hunt for the little girl and the wayward feline. "We had to sign an agreement or they wouldn't release Jamie for this week. He's upset with me for doing it too, but it's just in the beginning. You haven't seen him yet. He can barely get out of bed and he's just so fragile looking. If he falls or if Bear jumps into him… it could be really bad."

"As it will be if Jamison feels that you and everyone else now see him that way or he has done something further to upset her. He is a proud man; don't treat him as an invalid, Edit."

"I won't when he's not!" Eddie insisted as she jumped back to her feet. "But for now I have to be the bad guy that decides what's best for all of us though, and today that means Bear has to stay with Henry and Frank. After this week when the PT guy isn't coming in here every day… maybe then we can try to see how it goes. I just have to do this," she added with firm resolve before turning to go up the steps.

"Kaylin, c'mon now baby, I see you," she started again when a quick peek in the little girl's room pinpointed her location as a pair of light up sneakers could be seen reflecting from behind the bed along with the end of a casually twitching black furry tail lying on top of them and a content, motorized purr emanating in the same rhythm. "Daddy's coming home soon, and we need to get ready. It's time for Bear to go to Grandpa's house."

"No, Mommy! P'ease! I don't want 'im to go 'way!" Kaylin cried as she hugged her furry friend harder. "Him stay here in my room! I bring his food and fishies here. Bear not hurt Daddy! Him nice!"

"Kaylin Elizabeth," Eddie sighed as she sat down on the floor against the wall and reached in soothingly to rub her daughter's leg. "Can you come out here and see me, please? Remember that Daddy doesn't like it when you hide and we're trying to talk to you like a big girl, right? Plus Santa is supposed to come tonight and you don't want to get on his naughty list today, do you? I know you will miss him for a little while and that Bear would never hurt Daddy on purpose, but it could happen by accident. It's only for this week until Daddy's feeling better, sweetie… I swear. We all have to help right now though because he got hurt… Please, baby, I need you to promise to be a good girl and do this because you love Daddy so much, and you can go see Bear every single day if you want to… just like I've been visiting the hospital. You know he likes to stay with Pop Pop and Grandpa because they spoil him with special treats all the time."

"But him only like to be there with me, not by himself!" the little girl insisted when she was finally coaxed back out in the open. "Him likes to s'eep here or with us, Mommy," she pointed at her bed as Eddie teared up, knowing far too well how lonely it was now to be separated at night when the one you loved was elsewhere. "And Daddy say I'm 'posed to take care of 'im!"

"I know, baby," she sighed as she pulled Kaylin onto her lap for a hug and brushed her face gently before sniffing and wiping her own as the cat settled down next to them as if he sensed his little person needed him to remain close. "I really miss having your Daddy sleep in bed with me too, but for a little while we need to take care of him and be very, very gentle," she admitted quietly. "It's the nicest thing when you can cuddle with someone that loves you, isn't it? It makes you feel all warm and safe. Until Bear comes back home, you can still sleep with me or Nagyanya if I have to stay downstairs so Daddy's not alone, okay?"

"But who Bear be with, so 'im not 'lone?"

"Oh, I bet he will sneak in with Pop Pop, don't you? His bed is all soft and squishy just like yours. We can ask him when we go over there and you can make him pinkie promise, okay? Now, we need to go get Bear's things together and put him in the carrier for the ride in the car. I'm so proud of you Kaylin Elizabeth, you're getting to be such a big girl."

"'Kay Mommy," she finally agreed as she sadly gave the cat another big hug. "But Pop Pop snores too much," the precocious preschooler observed as Eddie steeled herself for the rest of the process and further negotiations.

###

"Pop Pop! Nagyanya! LOOK! They here!" a much happier Kaylin danced in excitement later that afternoon as she looked out the front window of the house and spotted a familiar set of three black SUV's pulling up at the curb. The little girl and her two grandparents watched closely while a full contingent of bodyguards fanned out from the vehicles as Frank waited patiently in the front passenger seat after arriving from the hospital with his son and a certain blond-haired wife secured in the back safely behind the dark tinted windows.

"It seems quiet except for that one dreadful neighbor down there," Eva noted Mason's continued presence in his front yard with concern as he appeared to be fiddling with his light display across the street although considering her own personal experiences she knew that the relative hush of the neighborhood was likely a false comfort. "The horrid photographers…" she tutted, anyway. "I have never understood," she admitted while thinking back to her husband Armin's arrest and the subsequent scrutiny that surrounded both her and Eddie while the charges against him were revealed. "They once followed Edit to school," she revealed with a worried look down at her granddaughter before adding nervously. "All of this added stress on both of them… on us, is it really necessary? Your son informed them of everything that has happened. Why would they need a picture of Jamison coming home?"

"They don't," Henry observed bluntly as two obvious outsiders were being escorted from behind Mrs. Winkler's rhododendron bushes by a pair of dark suits as the little old woman shouted at them about trespassing from her front porch with one of her prized yapping chihuahuas perched in her arms. "But Francis is determined to make a stand on this. Let's hope that's all of them."

"Grandpa there! Can me go out to see 'im?" Kaylin begged again as she spotted Frank stepping out of the vehicle at last to offer a telling glare at Mason and a few choice words to the men as they were led past while Detective Nucifero stood at his side.

"No, baby… stay here and wait, remember what we talked about. Your grandfather said you must be inside this time," Eva cautioned with a firm hand on the little girl's shoulder as a few of the men returned and the Commissioner moved to the rear door to open it a crack and offer some directions to the passengers inside. "Be gentle when they come in just like we practiced."

"Should be clear now you two," Frank advised with another look up and down the street as he noted the unwelcome neighbor had retreated into his house once more. "Put your hood up, son," he warned as one of his men brought the wheelchair from the house and another carried a number of bags from the hospital. "You set? Detective Wilkes will help slide you out of the seat and into the chair. Let him do the work, understood?"

"Yeah," Danny agreed with a smirk as he pulled his NYPD hoodie over his head while Linda tucked her blond hair under the hat and wrapped a scarf around over top before buttoning up Eddie's coat and drawing on a pair of dark sunglasses. "I'm good with that if he promises not to drop me. Let's hope we cleared a path for the kid so he can come straight here instead of taking an extended tour of all the worst potholes in Brooklyn," he sighed while referencing the roundabout route home while a number of RMPs actively discouraged any pursuit from the hospital.

"Let's go."

###

"You just about ready to go, lambchop? Your dad should be calling soon," Eddie asked apprehensively as they waited for the all clear from Frank before departing and she busied herself for the time being organizing and reorganizing what little remained of Jamie's personal items in the already neat stack on the window seat after the remainder of his things along with all his required medical supplies had departed the Columbia Medical Campus with the first wave decoy group nearly two hours before. "We'll have to bring some of this stuff back when you stay here for rehab, but you'll be on the other side of the floor in a totally different room then," she hemmed while carefully folding up Kaylin's cherished and carefully colored Get Well Daddy card before tucking it into her purse and then laying out the warm insulated NYPD hoodie, soft wool cap and thick fleece blanket for his legs she had brought from home to keep him comfortable in the car.

"Yeah, guess so," he replied from his seat in the wheelchair where he was already dressed and looking so much more like his old self now unattached from all IV lines and wires and in a pair of loose basketball shorts over his brace, sneakers and a comfortable, long-sleeved, soft, waffle-weave shirt as he blew out a breath with an equally obvious case of nerves on display as he tried to quell the growing anxiety he was feeling. "I mean I've been waiting for this… God, it feels like forever, but… Ed, I'm kinda scared to leave too," he admitted out loud for the first time all day before she hurried over to turn her attention back to him just as Marguerite returned to the room with a bag of prescription bottles in hand so that no further stops needed to be made en route.

"Now, that is perfectly normal, dear… I have that effect on all my patients," the nurse chided tongue in cheek as she carefully checked the medications and entered them into the computer. "You've just gotten a bit used to us here and know what to expect is all. Once you're home, you'll be able to adapt as well. You've been doing very well the last few days," she assured them both. "I know it's useless to say this given your type, but just try to relax when you get there and put your life as you knew it on hold without guilt. You will have many others there to pamper you… let them. You've already suffered through a very strict lecture from Dr. Kenzie on the dangers of infection or falling and what is to be allowed this week. She will also have Aaron checking you carefully each day so no shenanigans or I will not be happy, Sergeant Reagan. Do not dare fill up a bed in this ward again because you chose not to listen to her," she warned with a narrowed eye and a raised eyebrow at what had become one of her favorite all-time charges despite his challenges.

"Yes, ma'am," Jamie conceded with a small, wry smile as he felt a little of the tension dissipate with her easy manner.

"Oh, we're totally clear on all that," Eddie admitted as she considered the intense primer they had received from a doctor who had placed her patient's mental and emotional well-being over what could be seen as the cold requirements of a study she had staked her life's reputation on with a now highly agitated investor. "He stays in his bed, chair or on the couch… make sure he rests and eats everything that's on his list, and limit all physical contact with visitors unless they've washed their hands and basically drowned themselves in that industrial strength hand sanitizer she gave us. I have two huge bottles."

"Good," the nurse returned. "Because with this ward empty I intend to have this entire week between the holidays off at home with my husband for the first time in many years, and I know you don't want to disappoint me. Now, do you have any other questions, dear?" she directed to Eddie as she handed her the bag. "Be sure to keep these safely put up with a little one running around the house. Jamie will have a full dose of his oral pain medication before he leaves… and don't sass me, young man, because the city is full of potholes and rough roads right now and you are going to be bumped around a bit and needing these unless your father commissioned an airlift home in Santa's sleigh," she insisted as she handed over the pills and a small drink of water. "Linda already picked up the antibiotics and injectables at your home pharmacy and everything else is spelled out in his discharge papers."

"Thank you so much, Marguerite," Eddie acknowledged gratefully as she reached for several envelopes in her purse while putting the medicine away. "This is for you, and one for Janet and William too. From the family," she explained as she handed them over. "Henry insisted we take care of his nurses. We're so grateful for all that you've done for us. Please accept a nice dinner and evening out on the town with your husband," she smiled. "I know you deserve that and more after putting up with us, and Merry Christmas."

"Oh, dear… that is so kind of you," the nurse smiled before gratefully accepting the cards. "But not necessary; seeing this one off after all the trouble you caused is the best present of all. I'll be stopping by to check in on you when you're in the other wing though," she informed with a stern look towards Jamie as the phone rang with the anticipated signal from Frank. "I expect good reports on your behavior over there… I've warned them about you and Quincy is already stretching their patience. You boys together will be the death of them," she tutted while grateful the two had struck up a fast friendship. "Take care now, Jamison, and remember what I said about letting others do for you back home. It's only here that we will expect more."

"Yes, ma'am," Jamie teared up as she reached over and gave him a heartfelt hug. "Thank you," he whispered with a voice full of emotion as he was finding it hard to leave the confidence and warmth she offered which reminded him of his mother Mary in an earlier time.

"You're very welcome, Sergeant Reagan," Marguerite smiled as she stepped back. "Now, is it time to call for an escort?" she asked as Eddie confirmed with a nod while still conferencing with her father-in-law over the phone. "Very well, I'll have the orderly come get you in a few minutes. He'll assist you in getting into the car. Dress warm," she ordered with a final motherly look at the pair before stepping off. "It's cold outside."

"She's right," Eddie confirmed a few minutes later after hanging up and bringing over his added clothing and the blanket to help him dress by carefully slipping him into the insulated zip up sweatshirt. "You need to put all this on but the car will be warmed up, okay? Baker is picking us up at the side entrance in her vehicle and Lieutenant Gormley will be following in an unmarked."

"So what did Dad say?" Jamie inquired as things fuzzed just a bit while the pain medication started to take hold. Luckily his dosage had been fine tuned over the past several days to the point where it masked some of the discomfort while causing milder mental space outs although he had already vowed to minimize its usage at home. "Were the vultures out there?" he asked, still thoroughly annoyed that everyone had intended on sheltering him once more.

"Just a few, but it's all clear now," she assured. "Most of them were camped out front here earlier, and they totally bought Danny's act and left. RMPs from four precincts were waiting and thinned out the ones that tried to follow with traffic stops before your Dad's entourage got to the house and then they found two more down the street once they got out of the car. Everyone thinks you're already at home, and it's quiet. The only neighbor that was outside being nosy was Mason of course. I really can't stand that guy," she vowed while shaking her head with a small frown. "Frank said he stared him down, and the creep went back inside; it's safe to come. I'm sure they'll get bored with us now and move onto something else."

"Yeah, okay," he agreed with a sad huff. "And Kay's all right about Bear?" he worried. "I really hate that you took him over to the house. She won't sleep right at night without him."

"She'll be fine, I told you… we talked," Eddie fluffed over that early morning conversation which had seen both mother and daughter reduced to tears before the end before the cat was dropped off with promises and bribes not to upset Jamie in the mix. "Stop worrying, Papa Reagan," she assured. "He'll be fine there and right now all your little girl wants is her daddy at home and for Santa to come tonight. She'll see Bear tomorrow at dinner. Mom's gonna take her over for the family meal after the Children's Mass at eleven and to open presents there for the afternoon while you and I relax at home. Everyone else will visit us a few at a time to keep things quiet so you can rest."

"So you've got everything planned already," he sighed with regret over having to be babied and uprooting everyone's plans considering the fact that they were missing having the whole family together for their favored holiday traditions. "You need to go see Kaylin in the play though if you won't let me come," he insisted sadly as any thought of attending the crowded and public church service had been instantly shot down by a pair of fierce blue eyes. "I'll just take something and sleep then."

"And leave you alone? No way," she denied vehemently with a frown at the obvious depression that was still circling around him like a darkening cloud, particularly anytime something was brought up about missing Kaylin's activities. Perhaps a very carefully planned short jaunt up to watch soccer practice in four days with a get well party thrown in afterwards was not totally out of the question depending on how things were going she reasoned as it was obvious that Jamie needed something fatherly to lift his lagging spirits. "Jack said he'd livestream it for us."

"For _us,"_ Jamie protested. "You need to be there for _her._ Maybe your Mom or someone else can stay home. This can't be all about me."

"Okay, but for right now, it is," Eddie insisted as she refused to hear another word about someone else looking out after him and decided flight was the correct approach to putting this argument to rest for now. "Besides, Kaylin wants her Nagyanya there too… she's gotten really attached to her the past week since Mom's been running her around and she even hemmed her costume for her. I'm gonna take all this stuff downstairs and make sure Baker's ready… Wait here. I'll be right back for you."

"Ed… the orderly's coming, you can just stay..." he trailed off with an air of frustration as she hurried out of the doorway behind him anyway and down the hall to the left towards the center lobby with the rest of their things. "I hate being treated like a cracked egg again," he muttered to himself.

"Heard you needed a ride downstairs," a somewhat familiar voice beckoned from behind him in the hall a few moments later although in Jamie's distracted and mildly drugged state he once again failed to pick up on the past connection.

"Yeah, I guess," he disheartenedly replied without turning around. "Let's just get out of here," he added while easing his leg down off the bed where it had been propped and onto the well-padded elevated leg rest before zipping up his jacket and obediently slipping on his wool cap. He was still preoccupied with thoughts and fears over his imminent homecoming while the orderly unlocked the wheels and turned to push him down the hall and into the empty back patient transport elevator.

"Thought we were going out the front this time. My wife will be coming back up that way..." Jamie mused when he finally noticed where they were just as the man turned him around and hit the button to close the doors and a startling sense of recognition swept over him. "Wait, Special Agent Sisco?!" he asked in shock as he looked up and was hit with the reality that all of this had not been the product of drug-induced hallucinations or crazy dreams. "So it was you! I didn't imagine it!… You… you did something to me last time! Let me outta here!" he demanded and pushed himself as far away against the back wall as possible.

"Not so fast, baby Reagan," the undercover FBI agent hissed as he hit the button to stop the car before they got to the second floor. "You and I need to have a talk alone first, and this time we're not taking no for an answer."

* * *

 _Ruh-roh. So there is something fishy going on up there at Columbia, and perhaps Oliver Wendell is not the only one that has a hand in it as George's special mathematical talents have revealed. Next, Jamie will discover that he and his former rookie might just have been pulled back into a covert investigation... perhaps against their will as Kenzie's study is threatened and the doctor's own integrity might come under question before we finally have the true homecoming as Kaylin's daddy finally arrives in Bay Ridge._


	62. Chapter 62

Chapter 62

"Okay, we're all set, lambchop. Baker will pull the car up to the door as soon as I signal her, and… Jamie?" Eddie puzzled as she came around the corner expecting to find him still sitting in his room waiting and instead walking into an eerily empty, quiet space. "Hello? You in there?" she knocked on the bathroom door and then hesitated before reaching for the handle and opening it, finding it unoccupied as well. "Now where did you go this time, Reagan?" she murmured as a quick look up and down the hall revealed no sign of either her husband or Marguerite.

"Excuse me," she inquired after walking back out to the central security desk. "Did an orderly take a patient out of the surgical wing in a wheelchair? I'm looking for my husband. He's supposed to be released today. I have a car waiting downstairs."

"No, sorry, Mrs. Reagan," the guard answered as he handed back her phone. "You probably just crossed paths if he took the patient elevator in the back and they're already downstairs waiting for you now."

"Oh, okay, I bet that's exactly what happened," Eddie conceded to that likely benign scenario. "Thanks, and Merry Christmas, Albert. Hopefully we won't see you again until the New Year."

"Merry Christmas to you too, enjoy," the older man offered as he watched her hurry back to the central elevators and nervously wait for a ride down after hitting the button, reminding herself to breathe and be positive once more no matter what was about to happen.

###

"What's going on?!" Jamie demanded suspiciously as he pushed himself backwards until he hit the rear wall, determined to maintain as much distance as possible, however slight it was, in the elevator between himself and the now-recognized FBI Agent who had once approached him as a rookie about taking his brother Joe's place in the investigation into the Blue Templar. With no means of escape in his current condition since the man was standing in front of the door and control panel, he felt trapped and helpless to fight back as his pulse quickened and eyes narrowed.

"Settle down, I just need to talk to you a minute like I said," Special Agent Alan Sisco revealed without making a move towards him while checking his watch. "We've got a few minutes of loop in the security footage where we can do this. Sorry about the last time, but you gave me no choice. I've been working my way inside here for months and the way you spout off stuff when they drug you, once you made me it would have compromised the whole operation so I had to make sure you either forgot about it or were babbling such nonsense they wouldn't be able to tell what was going on. I had to buy time and get approval from my superiors to bring you on board."

"Buy time? So you did what? Roofied me here in the elevator?!" Jamie gasped as he struggled to put two and two together. "I felt like I was losing my mind!" he snapped. "I was dreaming about all kinds of crazy shit, forgetting things, not eating for days… my wife thought I was delirious or dying from some kinda goddamned complication!"

"Yeah, not exactly a roofie, but close enough," the other man admitted with some small hint of regret showing at the mention of Eddie's apparent reaction. "Sorry about Janko… you do kinda go off the wall with any type of hard stuff, but now that you've been mumbling about the FBI and all kinds of other nonsense for days, you could come right out and name me and no one would pay you any mind… kinda like the old days with those rabbit ears you guys used to use in the box to discredit perps, remember? And listen, it wasn't really my idea for you to show up here in the first place," he defended.

"Um, yeah, or mine either… the car that hit me pretty much took that out of my hands or were you behind that too?!"

"No, of course not," Sisco insisted as he shook his head, not realizing himself at this point in time that the two investigations he had involved himself in with the youngest Reagan were now intertwined and would come back full circle courtesy of a revenge-seeking father from the Blue Templar era. "I got nothing against your family, and just to be straight I didn't ask for you either, but you're here and you know who I am... can't beg off on having the flu again to stay away from you for another week or I'll get canned."

"So why show yourself now?" Jamie demanded. "You said you've been under for months and I'm going home! The hell are you doing here anyway and bring me on board for what?! I told you last time with Anderson… you got my brother Joe killed by putting him in with Sonny Malevsky and leaving him and Lydia Gonsalves there with no one to back them up! You let the rest of us think all that time that he got shot in a bust gone bad! I don't want anything to do with you!"

"Still investigating corruption," the man continued anyway, pointedly ignoring Jamie's directed ire at past events. "And you forced my hand… the absolute last thing I needed in my life right now was you coming in here and leading a parade of NYPD elite in with your nosy brother, an ADA, the Police Commissioner and now that freaking math genius whiz from 1PP that tipped Wendell off about the bug in their program with the press camped outside the front door! I need to know what you do… why was Mahoy here?"

"George?" Jamie puzzled. "He's my old rookie partner, and his wife…" he paused to catch himself in one of those annoying now recurring mental slips. "I mean his girlfriend's gonna be my home RT so they got to talking and Kenzie asked him to help her with something when they stopped in the other day. He didn't tip them off about a bug, he just found a couple of numbers transposed that made her stats go off. He… he didn't find _everything_ you mean," Jamie caught on as his eyes flashed while despite the meds and his current state those sharp wheels in his brain and the Reagan propensity for uncovering chutzpah clicked into full gear courtesy of a substantial hit of adrenaline from his still pounding heart. "You… you hacked their system somehow, didn't you?" he accused. "George found an error that shouldn't be there because one of your techs got sloppy, but all that means is they'll get suspicious and maybe check all the code, right? Who are you after?" he demanded before making the conclusion himself. "Oliver Wendell? That little rich investor jerk with mustache and the big mouth? What's he done?"

"Follow the money. We've connected him loosely to extortion, falsifying records and bribery through the FDA… but his company's technology has been linked to several splinter groups overseas so that's possible espionage, and the patent he's applying for is a huge cash cow… hundreds of millions or more just waiting for the first one to claim it and he's looking to suck as much money out of the United States federal government with it as he can. What we really want to know is what he plans to do with it. Those damn high tech 3D printers are getting to the point where they can fabricate weapons airport scanners can't pick up. If technology like that falls into the wrong hands… we could be looking at another 9/11."

"Wait, does Kenzie know about this?" Jamie challenged with sudden concern for his dedicated surgeon who was basically responsible for saving life as he knew it by that point. "She's under investigation too?!" he continued when Sisco's expression set and he did not immediately deny that fact.

"Charlotte MacKenzie has contacts in the system that go all the way to the top of the Naval food chain," he warned. "That's why Wendell picked her. On the other side of it her uncle is Deputy Surgeon General and Deputy Chief of the Naval Bureau of Medicine and Surgery, Rear Admiral Michael Minton… a real hardass. Let's just say he has a lot of people at the highest levels who wouldn't be disappointed if they had something like the possibility of his precious niece's sterling reputation being trashed to hold over him and force him out."

"But you really don't think she's involved, do you? 'Cause she's not… there's no way. I am literally staking my life on it right now!" Jamie tried to persuade. "She's straight up!" he added adamantly using Rick's own words to describe her.

"Doesn't matter. If she's tied to this crook when he goes down… well then there goes her career and everything else she's trying to accomplish."

"But she's helping people… these forgotten military guys no one else seems to give a damn about! She brought George in because she wanted to make sure everything that was submitted to the FDA was correct! Does that sound like someone trying to scam the system? She's making a difference here!" Jamie insisted, growing frustrated as he sat back and considered the ramifications of what this likely entailed not only for himself but for everyone here now and to come after like Quincy and Rigs.

"Then someone who has a vested interest better make sure she comes through it squeaky clean without a shadow of a doubt, or too bad for her and the military guys," Sisco baited and openly revealed the reason for this little repeat encounter. "I assume that someone is gonna be you since you give a damn about Kenzie and her study, and you gotta admit you have the perfect cover, man… who would suspect? We don't know how wide this spreads or how high it goes. That's why we need somebody else on the inside. My boss doesn't really want to see her go down, but he's written her off as collateral damage if I can't find a way to protect her during the investigation. It's been slow going because of all the security measures here and the fact that I'm the only one that's been able to get in so far. I need someone else who can keep an eye on what's going on when I'm off duty and get intel on the patients that are coming in and out… see if there's any connection to those overseas factions. With you inside we can have Mahoy watch the tech side of it since he's got credentials. Kenzie's still on the radar because she's brought in some guys with hefty security clearances and has given Wendell access to them while they're in a vulnerable state. He might be exploiting that or having someone in here doing it for him. That SEAL Commander for instance… he roams around a lot and he's been checking you out. You'll be hanging out with them in rehab, should be easy to make small talk."

"Rigs? You've got to be freaking kidding me," Jamie swore under his breath as he contemplated this twisted turn of events and what was being asked of him. "First you wanted me to rat on dirty cops in my father's own department, and now you want me to spy on guys that are here because they got shot or blown up for their country and then tossed aside. This is effed up! You're serious, aren't you? I mean look at me right now! How the hell am I supposed to do anything? Since your little cocktail and everything else that's been shot into me, I can't even keep stuff straight up here all the time," he pointed to his head. "Maybe you need to find another guy," Jamie stressed as he ran his hand through his hair, having already given up any hope of continuing his patrol career, but now here he was being recruited by the damn Feds. God if Danny ever found out about this… still he felt that familiar sense of allegiance for a certain rescue man who had saved his life multiple times and a surgeon who had done the same and obviously put herself on the line for him, not to mention Quincy and Rigs who he was equally sure was on the good side of things.

"What if I'm out? You take Wendell down and she loses her funding, then what?"

"She can always find another investor, maybe it sets her back a couple of years, but if she loses her reputation or winds up in prison as a co-conspirator because no one else gives a damn then she won't ever cut in an OR or get support for any project again. Look, I understand you have reservations. An investigation like this is a high-risk assignment, especially in your condition. But I can offer you the full support of the FBI, both now and when this is over," he added with a knowing glance at Jamie's leg. "We've been trying to bring you into the fold for years, and with your background you'd have options at the Bureau, no matter how you come out of this... more than you'll have here, even with a daddy that's the PC."

"A lot of good that did my brother, Joe."

"Reagan, I get the beef you have with me, but I gotta say, I'm surprised at you for thinking about it this hard. You've got a lot invested in us finding out the truth and you know it. It goes without saying that what you heard here was classified and for your ears only. No one else can know about this… not even your wife or I'll have to pull the plug, shut it down and let the chips fall as they may right now. That won't be good for Dr. MacKenzie or any of her legit patients here and it might wreck the chances of stopping another major terrorist plot. Go home and spend the week with your family, then I'll catch up when you're back here. Now, we're outta time so make up your mind. You ready to get to work? I got permission to swear you in right now."

"Jesus, I can't believe I'm even considering this," Jamie muttered as he sat back and stressed while contemplating the options which included a now apparent defunct career in the NYPD and a father that would never open the door to anything else besides disability for fear of reprisal for favoritism. "I must be high, or maybe this is all just a nightmare too. Oh, what the hell, I'm in… yeah," he finally conceded as his conscience was tipped by the thought of what would be lost to the deserving men and women here if Kenzie's career was torpedoed. "I owe her and the rest of these guys something, don't I?… Don't we all?"

"Great. Here, read the back of this and raise your right hand," Sisco ordered as he pulled a card and an illegal phone from his pocket to memorialize the event.

"Danny and Pop are gonna kill me," Jamie muttered as he worried most about what his sibling's nuclear reaction to this would be considering he hated the Feds more than the thought of his kid brother's involvement with anything military and here he was combining the two, not to mention how Eddie would take it if he held this back from her. Nonetheless, he felt duty bound and took a deep breath before continuing with an oath that would likely change the direction of his life and career forever. "I, Jamison Henry Reagan, do solemnly swear that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; that I take this obligation freely, without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion; and that I will well and faithfully discharge the duties of the office on which I am about to enter," he paused and looked up before adding an appropriate "So help me God."

"Congratulations, Special Agent Reagan. Welcome to the Bureau, and in case you're wondering the same considerations we discussed last time are still intact. Someone will be in touch. With your law degree and record in the NYPD, a successful operation here and you're looking at a bump up to supervisory status and double the pay you'd ever hope to make as a cop in no time. Now, we gotta get you out of here and downstairs before that hot-headed blond of yours gets suspicious."

###

"There you are!" Eddie exclaimed after finally spotting her husband being wheeled down the hallway on the bottom floor. "I've been looking all over for you!" she chided when a still somewhat shell-shocked looking Jamie got closer. "Where were you?"

"Sorry, ma'am, that was my fault," the apparent attending orderly inserted an apology. "I stopped to drop some paperwork off on another floor and got hung up for a few minutes waiting for the elevator to clear before we could get back down here," Sisco covered.

"Are you okay?" she fretted at her husband's pale complexion as she zipped Jamie's coat up to his chin and tried to pull the hoodie over his wool cap like what she would have done for Kaylin. "Here, let's get you ready."

"Yeah, Ed… I'm fine," he answered as he looked up and caught her hand to stop it. "C'mon, I can do that myself," he declared with mild annoyance as ironically on one hand his wife, who had no idea what had just happened in the elevator, was treating him like a toddler while the man standing next to her had basically left him feeling as if the security of the free world and the welfare of all the soldiers and one very talented and dedicated surgeon upstairs was squarely on his back now. "Please!"

"Okay, sorry," she conceded with a small frown and sigh before stepping back to signal the car. "They said it's all clear," she continued to caution and hover, however, as Jamie was quickly wheeled through the doors and out to the curb where Detective Abigail Baker waited in a nondescript looking but roomy silver Honda Pilot, sporting an unusual long red velvet dress and black-laced boots under her thick wool coat. The Commissioner's assistant ran around to the side to help as Lieutenant Gormley watched carefully from behind the dark tinted windows of another unmarked he was driving to serve as both an escort and part of the main distraction in their mission to see Jamison Reagan safely home to an anxiously waiting little girl on this Christmas Eve.

"Just let this guy do the work," Eddie insisted.

"Yes, dear," Jamie grimaced without noticing his appointed chauffeur's somewhat odd attire as between the three of them he had little time to think as he was quickly helped up out of the chair and lifted with his braced leg steadied in a nervous wife's hands before being slid across the second-row bench seat on a waiting blanket with little fanfare.

"Thanks, I think I've got it now," Eddie added as she dismissed the orderly without another thought as she turned her attention to the matter at hand and Agent Sisco paused to give Jamie a knowing nod and pseudo salute before taking the wheelchair back inside. "Now, all we've got to do is get all of these pillows propped up around you and then we can fasten the seatbelt."

"Ed," Jamie huffed and shivered as despite all precautions a serious chill hit him and even that small amount of exertion had left him out of breath while she quickly went about her mission. "Honey, there's is not one place on my body you can do that," he reminded as between the leg, the surgical site over his hip and those still tender ribs at this point he would have rather gone through the windshield than be strapped down anywhere. "Just put one pillow behind my back, throw a blanket on me and get in; I'll be fine. Besides, Mario, you're not behind the wheel; I'm in the back seat and Baker's an excellent driver, right Abigail?"

"Second in my tactical driving class at the academy," Baker confirmed with a nod as she climbed into the driver's seat.

"Well, just for the record I was eighth in my class, and I'm riding back here with you in case you need me anyway," Eddie insisted as she finished tucking any number of pillows and the heavy fleece around him before crawling into the third row and leaned forward to keep an arm wrapped protectively around his shoulder. "I'm not going anywhere. Now let's get home to our baby girl," she encouraged.

"She's gonna be scared when she sees me, Ed… I know it," Jamie worried at what his sensitive daughter's reaction to all of this would be. "She'll wind up hiding behind the couch. This is all she's gonna remember about tonight for the rest of the year," he lamented as he took in his current state and regretted the fact that the cat had been removed once more.

"Not if we distract her with something else," Eddie tried to assure as there was a plan of action in place already to do just that and instill a bit of Christmas spirit back into a badly broken father's heart.

"Gonna have to be a pretty big distraction," he noted sadly. "This and missing Bear. It's not right. She'll never go to sleep without him tonight."

"Oh, I think it will be special enough," Baker chimed in as she had been an integral part of setting this whole thing up once she and the Commissioner had shared similar thoughts on how to make this homecoming a happier memorable occasion for the little girl and Jamie in particular who was undoubtedly worried that he had ruined the holiday for his daughter and the rest of the family. "Your father has a bit of magic up his sleeves tonight."

* * *

 _Hm, what could Frank and his band of merry little elves from 1PP be up to? And I wonder what the family's reaction might be to Special Agent Jamison Reagan when that little tidbit is revealed to them at some point in the future? I was planning a bit of a break from Jamie's grumpy angst here as it felt only right to let the poor boy and the rest of the Reagan family enjoy his arrival home and have a silly, light-hearted chapter on their Christmas Eve before the tuna started hitting the ceiling fan again at Mass the next day, but that's not quite how it worked out in the end..._


	63. Chapter 63

Chapter 63

 _Bear with this one (ha!) it's light and fluffy I'll admit, but I actually wrote this Christmas week so may or may not have been influenced by a little too much holiday spirit(s) and was missing the time when my own two were little enough to believe. :)_

* * *

"What's the matter, cuteness?" Danny questioned as he walked over and sat down on the floor next to a despondent-looking Kaylin while she leaned on the sill and peered out the front window just after five o'clock at a darkening street aglow now with the lights from neighborhood Christmas decorations reflecting off the remnants of the previous night's dusting of snow while Eva, Frank, Henry, Linda and her aforementioned uncle all waited for Jamie and Eddie to arrive home. Despite the occasion, the mood was more somber now with Danny and his wife continued to grieve silently and hide their own issues while the others remained unaware and contemplated the difficulties that would be facing the much-loved young couple and their cherished tiny daughter here momentarily.

"It dark and him not here," the little girl whispered sadly.

"Your Daddy, or Bear?" Danny asked carefully as his niece had appeared to become equally aggrieved with the banished feline as the day had worn on and there was no way to tell at the moment which one she missed more. "Because I have it on pretty good authority that Daddy's almost home, and Bear is living it up at Grandpa's house… see, Jack and Sean are over there with him and Auntie Erin and Nicki right now," he said as he showed her a selfie of the other half of the Reagan clan sitting on the couch in front of the fireplace with the cat at the family home waiting as Frank had made an executive decision and decided it would be better to keep Jamie's true arrival more low key inside the house for the evening rather than to stress him or Eddie with an entire room full of people at once, particularly one still-opinionated sister who was opposed to this homecoming as being too early and detrimental to her younger brother's health. "Maybe it's Santa you're watching for," he continued to try purposefully to cheer, knowing that there was a choreographed plan in the works to inject a bit of Christmas magic into the event to make her feel better about what was to come.

"Maybe," Kaylin offered in an usually quiet, noncommittal way just as Frank's cell phone rang on cue.

"Reagan," he answered in a very authoritative voice as he walked over to join his son and granddaughter at the window even as the corner of his mustache twitched up since after the stress of the past few weeks, Jamie, Eddie and the entire family seemed to need this lift just as much as a certain three-year-old, and he gave thanks once again to a pair of dedicated co-workers who had taken it upon themselves to help arrange it with his permission of course. "You don't say? No, I understand, keep me up-to-date if you find anything," he added after a pause as he rocked back on his heels, seemingly firmly entrenched in his usual Commissioner role so a precocious Kaylin suspected nothing while her grandfather pulled back the curtain further. "Huh," he marvelled as he switched the phone to speaker so everyone else could hear.

"What's happening, Francis?" Henry slipped into his part since he was also privy to the goings on and joined them before Eva walked over as well. The only one who stayed back was Linda at this point. She had agreed to remain at the house after Frank asked her to check Jamie after his drive just to make sure everything was fine as they settled him in. No doubt if her father-in-law had any idea what had happened he would have approached this in a much more sensitive manner, but he was distracted and unaware of what his older son and his wife had been through that week. Knowing what Kaylin was about to experience made being there a thousand times worse though and she desperately tried to hide her tears before anyone else could notice.

"That was Gormley, there was a phone call into the 1-9 precinct that something odd was going on around here… a patrol car in this sector just reported finding one set of very strange tracks in the snow of a yard after a neighbor heard a loud jingling noise and some thumps up above on the rooftop," he revealed. "The officer thought he saw a blinking red light too, might have been from a nose but he lost sight of it in the trees and couldn't be sure. Gormley's on his way here right now and asked me to keep a close watch outside to see anything came by this way. One of our mounted units has also been assigned to look into this."

"Hm, what could be out on Christmas Eve night that leaves strange tracks in the snow, thumps on rooftops, jingles and might have a red nose," Danny wondered as he scratched his chin thoughtfully and rolled a careful eye over at Kaylin to see if she was on board yet. "Boy, that's a tough one, maybe you need to put your best detective on the case, Commissioner."

" _Rudolph,"_ the little girl answered in wonder as her eyes widened a bit and she looked out the window with greater interest again. "Me put food out for 'im," she revealed and pointed to the spot in the front yard where she had sprinkled the little bag of oatmeal and glitter she had come home from preschool with earlier in the week which had provided the impetus for this little encounter once she had shown it to her grandfather as Frank pulled a few strings of his own to make it happen. "Him s'posed to 'ave a red nose and jingle bells on."

"Oh, so he does," Frank agreed. "You might be onto something."

"Humph, kinda early for all the reindeer and sleigh to show up, isn't it?" Henry grumped while trying to suppress a wide smile so as not to give their little act away. "I thought they were supposed to wait until all the good little girls and boys on the list were asleep at night?"

"Good point, Pop," Danny offered as he had slipped so easily back into that fatherly role Linda noted with a heavy pain in her heart. "But patrol said he only saw one set of tracks. Must be a loner making a special delivery if he's here already… unless… hey, cuteness, what did your teacher say about the Magic Reindeer Food?"

"Sprinkle on the lawn at night," Kaylin recited the poem that had been taped to the bag from her eidetic memory. "Moon will make it sparkle bright. As Santa's reindeer fly and roam; this will guide them to your home!" she finished and pushed her nose back up against the window, her excited breath fogging it up and she impatiently wiped it clear, leaving smudgy fingerprints behind.

"I bet that's just what happened, Francis," Henry nodded. "She put it out there a little while ago when we went outside to sweep the ramp off and he probably spotted it when they were flying over to warm up for the big night... must have drawn him in early. I bet Santa's looking all over for him… probably needs every one of those special deer he's got to pull the sleigh and make it through his long trip tonight."

Frank smiled at his granddaughter's rapt attention… they had her believing hook, line, and sinker now as he rubbed his mustache and picked up the phone again. "Okay, Lieutenant Gormley, Kaylin's right; I don't know how we missed it. Let's put a BOLO out on one missing Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. I believe he's reported to have a very shiny nose… if you ever see it, you might even say it glows," he ordered and brightened as he could hear a bit of a giggle from Eddie and hushed assurances for his surprised son in the background as he knew they were sitting in place just out of sight at the corner of the residential street which had been blocked off temporarily by a few off duty officers from the local precinct who had responded to the Lieutenant's request to secure the area while Jamie was dropped off, but first there was a little more play acting to do.

"10-4, sir," Gormley replied back over the open line. "Officer... ah, I mean Sergeant Nicholas from mounted reported a sighting on the 600 block of Driftwood heading north. He's in pursuit now."

"That's just down the street," Frank noted. "Maybe we should put our coats on and go outside to see if we can spot him. Hurry," he urged Kaylin as she flew over to the door and into her hat, mittens, jacket and snow boots in record time as everyone else pulled on something and joined her outside on the porch where Danny picked her up to his shoulder to provide a better vantage point and keep her warm as it was frigid enough to make their breath fully evident.

"Wait… did you hear that?" he paused as the whole family strained to listen and even his heartbroken wife could not resist coming outside to join them so as not miss what was to follow. "I thought it was…"

"JINGLE BELLS!" Kaylin gasped and jumped as the unmistakable sound became clearer. "Jingle bells! Me hear 'em! Over there!" she pointed wildly down the block, her claps muffled by thick wool gloves.

"You're right! Tell you what, you go with Grandpa down that way and see if you can find him and I'll double back on the other side of the yard to make sure he doesn't sneak around behind us," Danny said as he handed her off to Frank with the intention of being ready to help his brother out of the car and into the house while his niece was distracted so they could get Jamie settled before she saw him in an attempt to make this an easier transition for the little girl and her father.

"I can't believe Dad and all of you did this for her," Jamie whispered softly to his wife as they continued to listen, all choked up and emotional at hearing the excitement and happiness in his daughter's voice from their vantage point near the corner when he had been knotted up for days worrying about her reaction to his homecoming. "There must be ten off-duty guys giving up their time here tonight to keep the street secure. Over and above…" he trailed off shaking his head.

"And for you too… you're so worth it, lambchop." Eddie reminded through her own happy tears as she hugged him, just as elated to hear the relief evident in her husband's voice. "Besides, they brought their families too," she reminded while pointing to the small crowd gathered on the opposite corner with numerous children observing. "Kara even has Brandon here. This is what it's supposed to be about… for the kids, right? We all needed it. Baker set this up; she's best friends with Sergeant Nicholas' wife Janet who's a reading specialist and teaches at Hudson. He volunteered to trailer his horse Briggs over from the mounted stables and Vixen the reindeer belongs to them too and is coming from the Central Park zoo where she used her in the children's literacy program this week… so she already had an elf costume thingy and gave the okay to bring her…"

"Vixen, not Rudolph?" Jamie queried with a raised eyebrow as he wondered if he heard that right. "And she teaches the kids to read?"

"The wife, not the deer, silly," Eddie's nose twitched, and she cursed herself once more for using that word around him after all that time spent with Addison. "She's a tool to keep their interest, and by the way did you know that boy reindeers lose their antlers in the winter?" she asked in all seriousness while going off on a tangent. "Only the knocked up girl deers keep their racks until spring when the babies are born," she informed him with a pat of her own expanding pregnancy-swollen chest. "See? At least we have that in common, so that means technically Santa's sleigh is really girl powered so we deserve those capes. Besides, sweetness has everyone inside and around this family wrapped around her little pinkie, there's nothing they wouldn't do for her. The boys and Nicki and your sister are watching from over in front of Mrs. Winkler's house," she added without mentioning Erin by name since despite the current Christmas spirit there was still hard feelings between the two that had not been resolved, and perhaps would even be amplified now with Jamie's return home.

"Knocked up girl deers," Jamie repeated with a mocking huff at the strange turn this evening had taken. "Maybe it's time for more meds, dear… or is that deer?"

The sound of those cherished jingle bells, a glow from a red light passing them in the street combined with even clip clops from horseshoes walking on the pavement and another set of cloven hooves marching past the corner signaled the next stage of the production was underway.

"Are you ready, Mrs. Claus? You have an appearance to make and few presents to give out here," Gormley reminded as he climbed out of the passenger side of the car with a bag in hand, and assisted as Abigail Baker did likewise, fully decked out in a gray wig and glasses now as she shed her wool coat to reveal a vintage velvet red dress out of sight of everyone else while an RMP pulled up and they hurried to get in to join the other officer's wife while Eddie took her place at the wheel of the Pilot, ready to pull ahead when signaled. "Sergeant Nicholas reports one under, sir," Gormley informed everyone over the open line to continue the act. "We got him!"

"Tell Nicholas to bring him up to 801 forthwith!" Frank ordered as he continued to hold Kaylin. "I want to see this red-nosed, roof thumping, jingling bell jangling perp for myself. Has anyone come looking for him?"

"Patrol picked up an older woman a few blocks away claiming ownership," Gormley reported. "She's with some little helper in a green suit and funny shoes. They report it escaped from the petting zoo in Central Park. I have them in the car with me."

"Well, have them meet us here… we're all set otherwise," he informed them with a glance back behind them to see that his oldest and Eva had peeled away from the group and were waiting in the driveway on the opposite side for Eddie to pull in. "Maybe we can wrap all this up and go back inside soon. It's cold out!"

"Yes, sir," Gormley acknowledged and waived everyone on and Eddie proceeded stealthily into the driveway with the headlights off while her daughter's attention was directed elsewhere.

"LOOK!" Kaylin jumped as the smiling mounted officer turned the opposite corner on his fully equipped patrol horse leading a smaller, but easily recognizable antlered companion decked out in a festive harness and sporting a decorative halter complete with a functioning red-lighted nose attached. "THERE HIM IS!" she squealed as the small crowd gathered around the spectacle in the street and Gormley, Baker and Mrs. Nicholas pulled up in the RMP to continue the act and hand out presents of books and candy canes to all the children as well as carrots to feed the four-footed actors while Danny and Eva walked up to the car and prepared to help Jamie inside while everyone else was distracted.

"Hey, kid… you ready?" Danny tested as he opened the door to find his brother inside and looking a bit anxious now while Eddie quickly went to lift the rear tailgate to retrieve a few things and Eva brought the wheelchair out from the house and positioned it so that Jamie could be helped backwards into it.

"Yeah, go from this side," Jamie directed as he wrapped his right arm gratefully around Danny's shoulder and was carefully lifted out of the car with Eddie protectively guiding his braced leg.

"You alright?" his brother worried as he heard Jamie take a hitching breath as they carefully set him down. "Did I hurt you? Do you need me to get Linda?"

"No, hip's... just… a little stiff," Jamie gasped and tried to breathe through the pain all of this added jostling was causing him on top of the exhaustion from nerves and an hour's drive from the hospital, although he was determined to try not to show it in front of the family now even as his wife made it worse by stubbornly continuing to adjust the leg rest.

"Edit, stop," Eva murmured as she took in her son-in-law's now somewhat shocking state and one look convinced her that the best thing for now was to get him out of the weather immediately. "You can make Jamison comfortable in the house and fuss in there. It's cold, get him inside before he gets chilled too," she added in a no-nonsense fashion as she took control over the situation. "Daniel, _now_ I said… this way," she ordered with emphasis and took charge, quickly led the trio up the ramp and safely into the house where Jamie finally was able to take a breath of relief as the familiar sights and warm, comforting smells of dinner lifted him immediately, even the still psychedelic Christmas tree which remained radiating in the corner.

"Made it," he sighed deeply as the door closed behind them. "Finally… thank God… Ed, I'm finally home," he added as his head lolled back in the chair and he closed his eyes to savor the feeling of such an accomplishment… something they would have all taken for granted without another thought just a few weeks ago.

"I knew you could do it," Eddie agreed and pressed her forehead against him and kissed his cheek while overcome with tears and emotion herself as all the fears and anxiety of the past few weeks resurfaced. "Oh, Jamie… I knew you could," she sobbed herself and got down on her knees aside of him.

"Okay you two, break it up," Danny intervened after giving the couple a few moments and wiping his face in his sleeve with a sniffle after getting uncharacteristically weepy-eyed himself as even Eva found herself overcome and turned to bustle around the kitchen putting away the supplies in an effort to hide it. "You don't want Kaylin comin' in here and seeing this," he warned gruffly as he tried to cover his own emotions. "It'd be like walking in and finding Frosty melted on the floor in the greenhouse with the puddle you're making," he chastised. "You'll have everybody bawling including Pop. C'mon, now where do you want to sit? They'll be done out there soon."

"Maybe you should help him into the bathroom so he's comfortable, and then in the recliner?" Eddie questioned as the thought of Kaylin coming inside gave her the impetus to stand up and try to get control of herself. "Or would the bed be better?" she asked as she could see the toll the travel and everything else was beginning to take on her husband who was obviously shifting in discomfort now, his hip and back proving to be the most painful after the drive and changing positions. "Here, let's get this stuff off of you," she added.

"Not bed, not to see her," Jamie insisted as she began to help him out of his added layers. "Let's try the chair first," he offered and between the three of them they soon had his immediate needs taken care of and finished with him situated somewhat more comfortably in the living room as Eddie propped his leg up and covered his lower half in a warm blanket while Danny pushed the wheelchair off to the side just in time as the front door opened to the sounds of feet stomping off remnants of snow on the front mat and happy laughter coming in.

"Really, Francis… threatening to impound a reindeer on Christmas Eve in front of a bunch of little kids and Mrs. Claus of all people; no presents for you," Henry tutted in his best Soup Nazi impression as he came through the doorway first with a glance of relief to see that all was ready for them. "Seems like maybe Kaylin's got a special one already here though," he revealed as he stepped aside and let the happily chattering oblivious little girl inside. "Look who's waiting for you, sweetheart," he choked out as he knew the long-awaited upcoming scene would tap into the emotions of everyone present… he just underestimated the impact of those feelings as a vulnerable, sensitive child reacted unexpectedly to the sight of her obviously still injured father after weeks of stress and insecurity after being apart.

"Hey, sweetness," Jamie cooed softly from his seat with a smile as Eddie stood protectively by his side in case their daughter's first reaction was to run and jump on her father as her normal greeting, which sadly was just not allowed and Eva and Eddie had both tried to ingrain that in the little girl prior to this homecoming.

It wasn't.

Instead Kaylin stood frozen with blinking wide, light blue eyes, ironically like a reindeer in the headlights… transfixed by the sight of Jamie who, despite all precautions and regular dress, still pretty much looked like someone who had been struck by a car and teetered on the line between life and death for several weeks while enduring multiple surgeries, and not at all like the strong and active man who had walked out the front door after snuggling and kissing her goodbye the morning of the tragic event.

"Daddy?"

"Yep, it's me. It's okay, Kaylin, c'mere baby… don't be scared. Please, honey, I really missed you so much," Jamie pleaded again and his eyes lit up with sudden hope that was soon dashed as she broke her stupor and started to run towards them, however, what happened next hit him with a force greater and more damaging than any three-thousand pound '71 SS Chevelle could ever do as the entire room watched in disbelief when the little girl bypassed her father and ran crying directly into…

...Uncle Danny's arms instead.

###

"I think she's all settled up there," Danny replied with a throaty, despondent voice later that evening when he returned downstairs after helping to tuck Kaylin in her bed at a later hour when the rest of the family had already retreated to Frank's house to offer some quiet. "Your Mom's gonna sit with her for a while to make sure, but she seemed pretty tired," he admitted as he joined Eddie on a seat at the breakfast bar where she was nursing a cup of some soothing decaf Chamomile tea. "I think she's down for the count."

"Thanks," Eddie responded while staring dejectedly at her mug after the much-anticipated homecoming and reunion had royally flopped and snowballed to hell for want of a better description when Kaylin had remained starkly aloof and clinging to her uncle for the better part of the evening and had barely gotten close enough to Jamie for those hugs and kisses that he had spent weeks longing for although the little girl had finally relented amid many tears and allowed him to kiss her cheek goodnight just before falling asleep in Danny's arms.

"I'm really sorry it went down like that," he tried to apologize even given the fact that he had not done anything to elicit that kind of reaction from his niece and it had been as great a shock to him and even harder for Linda to watch given the circumstances.

"It's not your fault," Eddie admitted sadly. "She latches on to people that way when she's really upset… usually it's Jamie, except after Quinlan it was me and I couldn't put her down for days. I screwed up… distracting her wasn't enough. I'm not sure if Mom and I said too much or too little, but she wasn't prepared to see him like that at all, or maybe we made her too scared that she was gonna hurt him in some way if she even touched him… I don't know," she added softly as she took another sip of the warm liquid before including a vast understatement and troubling observation. "It wasn't what I hoped for… maybe tomorrow will be better. I've gotta think of something; he needs to feel like her daddy again more than anything else right now."

"The kid… how's he taking it?" Danny asked with continued guilt anyway as he knew that reaction had just about completely broken Jamie's already heavily bruised spirit. "I mean, should I go talk to him?" he worried at the fact that his sister-in-law was sitting out here alone in the kitchen while his brother had obviously already been transferred into bed in the dining room before the others had left.

"He's… he's not good, but no… well, it's too late now, anyway. We all tried and then Linda convinced him it was best to take some of the stronger meds tonight before she left because his pain level was pretty high after being bumped around in the car and everything," Eddie explained without looking up or acknowledging the fact that Jamie probably needed the release more for emotional reasons. "His hip was really sore… that seems to be the worst so far, go figure, so he didn't fight it too hard, considering…" she trailed off and thought about the utter look of hurt and disbelief that had radiated off of her husband after the night's unhappy encounter with their daughter. "She gave him a shot of something into that port after your Dad helped him in bed and it hit him pretty fast. He's already asleep. I'm gonna stay on the cot we moved in there in case he wakes up and needs anything. You should get going or it'll be after midnight before you all get home… we'll be okay now," she tried to assure. "Thanks for everything you did for us."

"Tomorrow..." Danny started even though there was a plan for that already in place too. "Eddie, you look really beat," he worried even as he considered all that his sister-in-law had been through that week and balanced his own wife's needs. "If you want help we can be over here early," he offered. "The boys can open their presents later."

"No, you need to be with your family, Danny… it's Christmas morning. Mom's here and besides your sister and Nicki are sleeping over at the house and Dad and Pop promised they would come in the morning as soon as I let them know Jamie needs to get up, plus Linda already said she'd rather stay here with him than to try to go to Mass at eleven because of her back so we're set," she informed as he considered sadly there was probably another more hurtful reason that his wife would choose to avoid the Children's service this year even though it was normally one of her very favorite holiday traditions and a reminder of Jack and Sean's time in the youth choir before they grew older and moved on to their current roles as altar servers. "Go ahead, we're good… I promise. I just have to get the presents down under the tree from the closet in the spare room and I'm going to bed too. It's been a long day," she admitted tiredly.

"Okay, but I'll help carry them since you don't need to be doing more steps, and listen… call if you need anything, anytime," Danny urged after giving her a supportive hug and helping with that final chore which saw piles of gifts stacked under the tree before retrieving his coat and shoes and stopping for a quick peek in at his younger brother who appeared outwardly to be settled and resting comfortably in his new dining room quarters, even if it required some chemical assistance this time around. "Night, kid… s'good to have you home," he whispered from the doorway and found himself offering the same bit of advice to follow that Quincy would never fail to sing before he welcomed the peace of dreams and sleep which had thus far eluded Jamie for the most part, and even now he began subtly to twitch as another strange vision descended.

"In the morning you'll be better… things are only getting better."

* * *

 _Poor Jamie, and I had every intention when I started that chapter of giving him and Kaylin a happy homecoming and at least one good evening before starting in again… I mean, c'mon, I brought in a real reindeer and Baker dressed up as Mrs. Claus and everything, but there's more to follow this week as Eddie pulls out all the stops to try reconnect with her husband while he's under her control in Bay Ridge and she struggles to get their daughter back on board even as tensions continue to mount between her and Erin once more and a few major oopsies by Mommazilla result in a step or two backwards. Next up is an emotional Christmas morning for everyone involved._


	64. Chapter 64

Chapter 64

"M...o...m...m...y..." came that familiar, feathery light whisper early the next morning before the sun had even broken over the horizon as Eddie lay on the small spare cot near the dining room doorway and felt an accompanying tug on her hand. "Come up'tairs and s'eep with _me,_ p'ease?" Obviously the youngster had been intent on her mission to persuade her mother to follow and had not yet realized it was Christmas morning or that the space underneath the tree in the darkened living room was now occupied by a host of colorful and lavishly wrapped presents that Eva had prepared with her every-present sense of decor and style.

"Kaylin, baby, I can't right now. I have to stay with Daddy. He needs me to help him and might be waking up soon," Eddie whispered back after a glance at her quiet husband and then her watch confirmed the time to be just before six o'clock. Despite the injection of pain medication, or perhaps because of it, Jamie had suffered through a restless night and periods of vivid dreams even though he had remained asleep by definition while his wife had been woken several times to sounds of his distressed muttering… something about the color magenta, weddings and hotdogs once again so she had elected to let him ride through them instead of trying to interrupt. "Come here and lay with me instead," she offered in an effort to make the little girl more comfortable with the situation and moved over slightly on the small mattress to make room for her to squeeze in.

"M'm not 'posed to… Nagyanya say no," Kaylin worried as she stood in the threshold and refused to go further. "Me be bad to hurt Daddy and Santa not come back."

"No, sweetness… you're not bad and won't hurt me, please don't _ever_ say or think that," came a tired but soft, reassuring voice as Jamie's eyes opened and he was roused to join the conversation while trying to connect with his daughter once more as his heart still ached to hold her, especially after multiple disconcerting dreams throughout the night reinforced the desire which was greater now than ever and worth every risk in his opinion. "You can _always_ come see me no matter what anyone else says," he urged with a bit of overt annoyance at his mother-in-law for the perceived reason behind his daughter's current fears. "Here, on this side," he directed his wife to the right of the bed. "Put her up here."

"Jamie, your hip is really sore already, and your leg..." Eddie balked and worried that the small child would inadvertently bump the surgical sites or cause further harm that would result in him having to remain at the hospital… or worse once more. "Kenzie said she can't, it's not safe for you yet. It's too soon."

"And the other side is my ribs and spleen, I know…. I'll deal," he challenged and demanded more strongly now as his frustration grew. "Just put a pillow down there; she'll be careful, right baby? Please, Ed, c'mon," he begged as his eyes glassed over and he tried to keep his growing anxiety in check. "She can't be scared of me," he mouthed in a silent, desperate way. "I _need_ her."

"Sweetie, will you go sit with Daddy for a little while?" Eddie relented finally as she met his intense gaze and saw no other way out at the moment so picked Kaylin up to hold her tight. "It's okay if you promise to be careful up there, alright?"

"NO, NO!… Mommy, I no want to!" the little girl protested with another frightened glance at her father and turned away to cling to Eddie's neck tightly even as her mother positioned a pillow as requested and turned to hold her over the edge of the mattress while trying gently to peel her away.

"It's okay, baby… please, just for a few minutes?" Eddie persisted even as she struggled to remain calm though the situation was obviously becoming distressing for all three of them once more. "And then we'll all go out in the living room and check to see if Santa was here last night," she shifted to distraction and bribery. "We can go wake Nagyanya up after we see if he left us some presents to open. Daddy just wants to give you a hug on Christmas morning, sweetie."

"Kaylin Elizabeth," Jamie tried with a little more sharpness and authority in his voice this time to catch her attention. "You are _not_ going to hurt me, I promise," he emphasized. "Here, we'll just sit up next to each other like we're both in a chair, alright?" he asked as he grabbed the remote and raised the back of the bed before gently touched her leg and both he and his wife were relieved when their overly sensitive daughter finally relented after a few more moments and slowly crawled into place next to her father who immediately wrapped his good arm around her and kissed the top of her head with a quivering sigh. "Thank you, baby… oh, thank you. I needed this… it's the very best present you could ever give me," he paused while his throat tightened and he hugged her again. "I feel so much better now… you're such a good girl," he whispered to assure her and inhaled the familiar scent of her baby shampoo deeply like a tonic as he felt her relax. "I missed you, sweetness."

"Me miss you more, Daddy," she finally relented in a familiar way and snuggled into his side as Eddie leaned over and kissed and hugged them both, savoring this moment of having her family almost completely reassembled together once again… minus one big cat she reminded herself before they were interrupted by someone else.

"Edit!" her mother called softly down the steps. "Kaylin is not in her bed! Is she with you? Is everything okay down there?"

"We're fine, Mom," her daughter acknowledged as she stood up with a smile and put a hand on her belly to remind herself that there was yet one more soul present to consider. "We're all going to be just fine now."

###

"Jamie, wait! Your Dad said to call, and he'd come over to help first," Eddie chastised a short time later when it became apparent her husband was determined to get up himself and take care of his own needs once he'd had his time bonding with his daughter who was now happily out in the living room oohing and ahhing over the treasures under the tree as she sorted through them with her grandmother.

"I'm fine," he insisted with a shaky sigh even though he still required a significant amount of assistance slipping into a new, soft waffle-weave long-sleeved shirt and Eddie was forced to avert her eyes so as to not stare at the port or his still battered-looking and bruised torso which quickly turned her stomach with the lingering almost black marks over the broken ribs on nearly his entire left side. "I have to do this stuff on my own, Ed. You all have work tomorrow," he reminded. "And I'm not relying on your mother," he added with obvious disdain for what he considered her part in amplifying Kaylin's fears.

"Well, you're going to have to whether you like it or not, and please don't be angry with her… she was just trying to help and had no idea what to expect when you came home," his wife pleaded with a nervous glance at the doorway into the living room where the little girl could be heard chattering with Eva.

"Whatever," Jamie brushed her off and attempted to focus his mind ala Quincy's directives on the task now at hand of getting out of bed and into the wheelchair. "Let's do this," he insisted, and they were both relieved a few minutes later when she helped him maneuver into the living room after he had managed to accomplish said goal with a reverse effort in the bathroom thanks in no small part to Wilson's carefully planned and now much-appreciated design. "I'm gonna have to buy him and the other guys a case of something good," Jamie had acknowledged with an exhausted huff when he was safely seated once more although all of that exertion had used up a good deal of his reserve strength and he opted to remain where he was instead of attempting yet another transfer to the recliner when they joined Kaylin and Eva.

"Daddy, LOOK! It says for you!" the little girl gushed with happiness as she skipped over with a small present in hand, obviously much more comfortable with his current state now that they had broken the ice. "Santa came! Me was good!"

"Of course you were, baby," he replied with only a subtle eye roll towards his mother-in-law before deciding it was best to let it go given the circumstances and that was all erased as another thought hit him while he gazed at the gift box in his hand and the pile under the tree. "Ed, honey… I," he stuttered in a bit of panic. "I'm sorry; I forgot, I mean I didn't even…"

"Didn't what?" she puzzled as she glanced back and forth between him and the floor before making the connection. "For me?" she asked before breaking into a little smile as her eyes sparkled and relieved his guilt somewhat. "Oh, lambchop, but you did, for both of us… don't you remember? That's what you and Rick were doing that night on the walk back..." she started before realizing all of that had remained a complete blank for him, even after all these weeks and probably would stay that way now. "Don't worry… you'll see," she assured with a squeeze of her hand. "They're perfect, and besides there's nothing I ever wanted more than to have you here at home with us, anyway."

"Daddy, HERE!" Kaylin circled back around while excitedly lugging another box, much bigger this time although starkly different in the level of wrapping technique as the little girl had obviously had a hand in preparing this one given the amount of tape and crumpled up loose paper on the ends alone. "Open, p'ease! Me and Nagyanya and Mommy get for you!"

"You did, huh? Well then I must be the luckiest guy in the room," he declared before continuing with a smirk and a hand on Eddie's belly. "For now I suppose it stays that way… outnumbered and I'll always be last in line for the bathroom," he admitted with a slightly disappointed sigh as he acknowledged his second daughter's presence before a few careful tears of the paper revealed what he could only imagine was an insanely expensive black high tech primaloft outer layer jacket purported to be comfortable to twenty below.

"To keep you warm," Eddie reminded. "Because…"

"I hate the cold," he laughed a bit and made eye contact with Eva who had continued to stare at her son-in-law to judge for herself where he was at in a potential recovery… and given his current condition she resolved that her help would be needed here in this house for some time to come, perhaps past the late spring when the newest unoka was due to arrive so there would be no need to proceed with a search for her own accommodations just yet. "Thank you all. I'm sure it will come in handy, considering. Go ahead, sweetness, it's your turn," he added and watched with interest as Kaylin ripped into a large present herself before pulling out a somewhat bent and damaged box containing a soft, plush smiling blond girl doll wearing a blue jumper proudly proclaiming "Big Sister!" while cradling a smaller, unisex but equally happy-looking baby version attached with velcro and complete with a curly cue spot of hair, a removable diaper, a bottle and a rattle. "That's cute, it even kinda looks like her," he whispered to his wife under his breath with not a hint of recognition in his eyes even as he watched his daughter frown a little and put the toy down. "Where'd you find it?"

"I didn't… you..." she stuttered and then waited until Kaylin moved away in search of another prize. "You bought it in Washington that night," she explained.

"I did?" he looked at her blankly. "But how?..."

"You had it with you when… and then afterwards I guess one of the guys with your father's detail put it and a few other bags in your room with your things. I found them the night I stayed there when Kenzie flew you up to Columbia, and I… I slept with them because I couldn't be with you and I was so scared," she revealed with her voice now quivering and then paused to open her own cherished little box to show him the simple inexpensive silver necklace with a heart charm and a brilliant blue-glass bead to mark Kaylin's sapphire September birthstone along with the tag stamped with her birthdate and a pair of similarly adorned flat metal rings hanging on the chain… one small and one big. The first reading in black hand-tooled lettering "Marriage Made You Family" followed by the second larger "Love Makes You My Mommy."

"There's one for her too that says love makes her my daughter," she whispered and grabbed his hand. "So we could be the same. These… Jamie, these are the most precious gifts anyone has ever given me, and I thought they might be the last things you ever…" she choked up before continuing. "Thank you, I love them," she added firmly with a nod and reached over to kiss him.

"M'm sorry… I don't remember," he admitted sadly even as the color of that blue stone instigated an immediate flashback of a certain Chevelle bearing down on him in the street and he sat back cursing himself once more for putting his vulnerable wife through all that grief and feeling added guilt about keeping his FBI involvement and a decision regarding his future in the NYPD from her. For the moment though he justified it as being necessary and the right path forward so he could support his family in the future… one that most certainly now would require a desk job as he lamented the fact that no feeling had returned to his lower leg just yet. He could not add to her worries about that now though and harp on it or reveal the conversation had with Sisco in the elevator either. "It's just all mixed up… stuff is still missing," he tapped on his head while frowning at the fact that part of those strange memories had indeed turned out to be true. Surely that couldn't be the case with the rest of them though, he pondered… especially not the most vivid parts about Joe and that damn car.

"That's okay," she assured and pointed to the first box Kaylin had brought him. "Not all of it's gone… look, I got your phone back," she tried to hearten as he opened it and pulled out an identical model to the one he'd lost. "The guy at the store did some kind of cloud thingy and presto, it's all there… even our pictures," she smiled as he turned it on and an image of the three of them appeared as his regular wallpaper. "You even got me these," she added before pulling out the Mario Andretti sunglasses from her stocking and modeling them to make him smile again. "We're putting the rest of it back together, Jamie… you'll see; it'll come. This is just one step forward until you heal and go back to work and doing the other stuff you love and then things will be okay and perfect again when the baby's here," she added, still firmly entrenched in her own state of denial that some or all of this could leave permanent scars on their family even as they watched Kaylin drop her new doll down to the ground where it remained pointedly ignored and untouched for the rest of the morning as it was apparent there were still many issues to work through before that sentiment was even a remote possibility.

###

"Hello… you are special! God is with you," an angelically dressed Kaylin opened the nativity play in church during the Children's Christmas service while Jack filmed from the side as promised and every Reagan present including a special guest in Eva Janko seated next to her daughter in the front row heaved an audible sigh of relief to see that the little girl was composed enough that morning to carry out her speaking parts even as Sister Grace was forced to step in and narrate the next lines when the Virgin Mary went mute and stared back at the audience blankly.

"Megan, you're not s'posed be afraid!" Kaylin insisted in a fierce whisper to her girlfriend as she ad libbed and tried to carry on with the show as they stood side-by-side. "You have to take care of baby Jesus! You're his mommy! The Holy Spirit will come give him to you!" she pointed at classmate Evan Thomas who was poised to swoop in and deliver the doll to the manger.

Needless to say the remainder of the dialogue in the carefully rehearsed play came a bit off the wheels during the rest of the production, but the little pre-school acting troop was given a standing ovation at the end anyway and Henry's chest was puffed out with pride over Kaylin's performance as he stood at the back of the church after Mass while his great-granddaughter finished changing out of her costume.

"Did you see her, Francis? She's a natural… stole the whole show," he insisted as the rest of the Reagan clan milled around and waited for Eddie and the little girl to reappear. "None of the others could hold a candle to her."

"They're three- and four-year-olds, Pop… it's hardly Broadway," Frank reminded although he too had a very satisfied look on his face as he rocked back on his heels with his hands in his pockets. "Wasn't sure how it would go after last night," he admitted with a heavy breath as he caught sight of his daughter zeroing in on Danny who had arrived late to the Mass after dropping Linda off to sit with Jamie. Erin had an obvious focus as she led her older brother deliberately away from the rest in their family group and down the front steps while her father wondered just who had spent a more trying evening the day before considering her mood at being left out of Jamie's first night back with them, especially when everyone else returned home early and reported what had happened after Kaylin's reaction.

"Walk with me," she demanded and took Danny's arm until they were safely out of earshot. "Dad won't tell me anything! Now spill… why were you late this morning?" she queried with great suspicion. "Is Jamie okay? He's not is he?!" she followed without even giving him a chance to answer. "I knew it was too soon for him to come home!"

"He's doing fine… I mean pretty much," Danny blatantly lied at first before giving in a little considering that he now shared her concern to a degree. When he and Linda had arrived at the house that morning he'd found a brother that was in much better spirits emotionally, but definitely feeling the effects of the changes in his environment so had physically tired himself out trying to keep up with everyone without any rest which he tried to hide from his wife while she was upstairs dressing for the service and as a result had been unable to get back in bed without a great deal of assistance.

"Pretty much?" Erin pressed as any sharp-witted lawyer or detective would. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing… I mean he just needed some help getting out of the chair and Linda can't do that right now with her back so I stayed for a bit until I was sure everything was okay. That's all."

"That's _all,"_ she repeated and shook her head. "What's he supposed to do for the rest of the week when everyone else is busy?!" she hissed. "You think Eva will be able to help him, or Pop? He's gonna wind up falling and hurting himself trying to do too much… you know it, and who's going to give him his meds to make sure he takes them? He needs full-time care, Danny… and Eddie is planning on going back to work tomorrow! He should have stayed at the hospital!"

"Erin, they have it handled. Linda's gonna be there late every morning to check him because she's only working half shifts at St. Vic's this week. That PT guy Aaron is stopping by early every day on the way into Columbia and Addison is floating in and out whenever she's coming and going from work, plus Eva's there during the day… Dad or me can help at night if we have to. His rookie Annabel started this whole care calendar thing online with an app to keep everything organized and covered so everyone stays spread out and isn't there all at the same time to overwhelm them. It even sends out reminders and Eddie's able to put in a list of things that need to be done so people can sign up and volunteer to take care of them… Wish I could add some stuff; the laundry's piling up at my house and Sean's slacking with the vacuum," he admitted with a frown.

"So I guess I'm not part of that team, right? Because no one told me about that or asked me to help!" she replied with a hurtful look evident as she turned away from the church to stare blankly across the street. "I wasn't even welcomed in their house last night, Danny!"

"Then you need to take that up with Annabel and Dad… it must have been his idea because he's the one who set that whole thing up and said the boys should stay away too. Listen, I've seen what happens when Jamie gets smothered over this… he shuts down… Some of that's been my fault," he admitted. "He had enough to deal with yesterday just getting in the door and seeing Kaylin and look how that went. Thank God she gave in this morning because that almost broke him, sis. I'm tellin' you the last thing he needs now is you and Eddie going at it in front of him. She hasn't so much as mentioned one word to me about what went down between the two of you… and I'm pretty sure the kid doesn't have a clue anything is wrong or he would have brought it up, so who's being the bigger person and looking out for him? Maybe you should try talking to her again and apologize to put this to bed before it even gets back that far," Danny advised quietly with a glance back up at the church doors where he could sense his father's presence if not outright stare radiating back down at them, do doubt wondering what Erin was up to after the blowup with that whole medical form thing had left several relationships still fractured within the family.

"Apologize? To her... again? For looking after my brother? Are you serious?"

"Yeah, I am 'cause you went about it the wrong way. Erin. You would have never dared try pull that kind of backhanded legal crap on Linda if it was me in that bed," Danny insisted. "So either I don't rate like the kid does or you're harboring something against her. Which is it? I mean I get it, you just want the best for him and you took over when Mom passed, but you're acting more like a crazy jealous mother-in-law instead of his sister… and even Eva's been more supportive. They're married and you do get that she's pregnant and there's issues with that too, right?" Given the current situation with his own wife and what he had endured that week after the visit to Dr. Geisner's office he reacted with more raw anger directed at his sister than she anticipated which took her a bit by surprise. "You don't know how hard that is so why don't you cut her a freaking break already?! And besides that, it's Christmas!" he reminded with a huff of self-righteousness after making that stand against her.

"Wait a minute, I'm harboring?" Erin hissed back. "So you're on her side? And because of that I'm supposed to sit by and watch Jamie hurt himself while he puts her first? That's okay with you? Well, I'm sorry… it's not for me!" she asserted before turning back towards her car in the parking lot. "Tell Nicki to go back home with Grandpa and help him start dinner," she called back over her shoulder as she unlocked the door. "I'll be back to the house in a little while."

"Erin, where are you going?" Danny sighed as if he didn't know the answer.

"I'm going to visit my brother before someone else tells me it's not allowed!" she retorted and left him standing there on the sidewalk alone in short order as she backed out of the spot and drove away.

"Wait, Mom is leaving without me?" Nicki's surprised voice cut through the cold air as she hurried down the steps while holding Kaylin's hand as Eddie walked arm-in-arm with Henry and Frank kept a careful eye on Eva to make sure everyone descended safely while wearing their Sunday best.

"She said she'd meet you back at the house, Nick," Danny revealed as he stared down the block where his sister's car had disappeared for a second longer before turning around. "She was just anxious to stop in and see Jamie before getting started on dinner," he added with apprehension as he glanced at his father and took a quick peek towards his sister-in-law to see how she was processing it.

"Eddie, take your mother and Kaylin back to my house first; I'll stop by first and speak to her," Frank assured with a heavy frown as this was not how he had intended this morning to go although he was not exactly surprised at his daughter's actions either.

"No, it's fine," she sighed, determined to handle this rift with Erin on her own since it was obvious that Jamie's sister had doubts on that very ability. "Mom, you take my car and Kaylin over to their house, please. I'll ride back home with Danny. I was sort of expecting her to be there earlier, anyway. I told you all before, this is between her and I… it will not be brought up in front of Jamie unless that's her choice," she added with conviction.

"Edit, your temper," Eva reminded firmly as despite her daughter's promise, she knew full well how that Serbian blood could boil over at a moment's notice, especially when her family was threatened and those Janko momma bear claws were unleashed although right now admittedly her mother was having those same feelings with a desire personally to go contend with Frank Reagan's daughter herself before anyone else could get to her. There would be time later if necessary to do just that, she vowed to herself.

"Don't worry, Mom… I'll swing the hatchet if I have to," Eddie asserted in a familiar way as her eyes flashed. "If you could do it with Daddy for me, I can for Jamie. He needs his family right now… all of us. C'mon Danny, let's get going… I need to talk to you about something important, anyway," she demanded after pausing to hand over her keys and hug and kiss Kaylin before turning heel and marching towards that infamous green Jeep which had just been released by the mechanic and picked up the day before.

"Bury the hatchet," Danny corrected as he gave the rest of the family a worried look and a shrug before turning to follow her. "I'm sure she meant to say bury the hatchet," he mumbled without conviction while hurrying off to catch up with a sense of dread at being forced to be present at the confrontation that was no doubt about to follow between these two strong women at odds while tossing in his own wife's presence into the mix as well.

"Oh, and Merry Christmas."

* * *

 _Poor Danny, he's so far out of his comfort zone with all of this emotional touchy-feely stuff, but seems to keep being drawn back into it even as Malevsky is about to step up his efforts to add to that angst with a focus on his past, but first Eddie is about to ask him for something else before she returns to the house in an attempt to "swing" the hatchet with Erin. Unfortunately even her best intentions might backfire this week and give an irate Reagan sister-in-law a prime opportunity for an "I told you so" or two._


	65. Chapter 65

Chapter 65

"Eddie, I really don't think that's such a good idea," Danny sighed and pulled his car over to the curb just down the street so they could finish their discussion before arriving back at the house where he felt certain there was going to be a confrontation with his sister anyway, and what had just been proposed would no doubt add fuel to the fire. "It's too soon… I mean just coming home last night and sitting in the living room this morning took a hell of a lot out of the kid," he worried although it was apparent that Jamie had been successful at hiding the full extent of his fatigue from his wife that morning. "You really want to take him out in the car again and put him through that? What about the germs he's supposed to avoid?"

"It's just for an hour on Tuesday," she insisted with hope evident. "Please? It's the only time I can get him out of the house for a bit this week and I want to surprise him. Ten minutes there, we come at the end and stay for a half hour or so while the kids finish practice and get doused in hand sanitizer, give him their presents at a little get well party, and then ten minutes home. It'll be really quick and Stacey Dawson said she'd set everything up to make sure it was ready to go so we don't have to do anything. You just need to run practice like before and Mom and I have to get Jamie there… that's it. Danny, he needs to feel like Kaylin's dad again, and she needs to have him to do something more normal before he has to go back to rehab. Once he's there, it'll all be about him being hurt again. You said yourself the other week that seeing those kids made you laugh and feel so much better… that it would cheer him up for sure. If you would have watched him relax this morning when she sat in bed with him and then later when he was watching her open her presents..." Eddie's voice broke as she stared out of the window and realized with an uncomfortable start that they were parked in front of Mason Lockwood's house of all places. "You know I'm right," she glanced over. "He was back… he was Jamie again. Now please let's get out of here and go home," she begged with a nod towards the little Cape Cod house. "I hate this guy. Mom said he was nosing around the other day when she was meeting with the ramp people and she told him off."

"Okay," Danny finally relented as he put the car back into gear, thankful to have avoided the wrath of Momma Janko himself to this point although Eva had been surprisingly placid around the family since her return. "I'll be there… Tuesday night at the turf field, but if I were you, I wouldn't announce that to Erin," he warned. "She's gonna want to bubble wrap him while he's at home."

"Oh, I know," Eddie acknowledged softly as she sat back and sighed. "I guess her and I are just gonna stay on opposite sides of this," she admitted.

"From where I see it, you both love him… that's not opposite."

"Yeah, but she's always seen me as someone she needs to protect him from," Eddie asserted. "I'm not perfect… I know I've screwed up a lot since Jamie got hurt and I'm trying to be better about not doing that anymore, but she never trusted me, right from the beginning when that whole thing went down with Kaylin at the bridge, so I guess that's not going to change anytime soon. I'm not gonna give in though, Danny… he's my husband and my life, but I don't want to make him choose again. That really hurt him the last time, and that's the last thing he needs right now so I guess I just have to suck it up and be a buttercup while she's around."

"Maybe it's because Erin never had that in her marriage," Danny revealed as he pulled in the driveway and turned the car off. "Someone that's willing to stick up for her and put her first… that's exactly what the kid is doing for you too. Her ex Jack was a weasel and after what went down with him and after all the hurt he caused her and Nick she just doesn't trust anyone outside of the family. Put that on top of Jamie being the baby and losing Mom and Joe all around the same time… now Nicki's leaving the house too and you get this," he explained. "She can't stand to see him hurt or feel like it's out of her control and she just wants to protect him. We've all tried talking to her, but I don't know… she needs to work through it too, because this time she's not listening to anyone, not even Dad… it's tough."

"It's tough on all of us… but mostly on him," Eddie reminded as she got out of the car and bravely walked up to her own front door, wondering what kind of reception she would find inside with two sister-in-laws each seemingly now opposed and uncomfortable with her presence for very different reasons. Undeterred, she took a deep breath and stepped inside after unlocking it with the keypad, surprised to see both women sitting together alone in the living room as Danny followed behind.

"Hey," she greeted them quietly, but with concern as Erin quickly looked away in an annoyed huff so she focused back on Linda while taking off her coat and hanging it in the foyer closet. "Everything okay?"

"Jamie's just asleep," the older woman admitted softly. "It took me awhile to get everything done they way they want it to be, and he insisted on trying to do it without any meds this time… it wore him out by the time I was finished though. He seems to be having a lot of pain in his hip, but nothing looks overly swollen and his temp is normal," she worried.

"Dr. Kenzie said it might be sore for a while because of the technique she had to use and the nerves that run through that area… I guess she needed a lot of, um… material," she added with a grimace for lack of a better word. "Plus I think sitting up in the car yesterday irritated it."

"Of course it did," Erin sniped under her breath as her older brother looked on and rolled his eyes.

"C'mon," he mouthed silently, caught in the middle of what he knew would likely be a futile attempt to keep a lid on the situation. "Don't do this… be nice."

"Well, we missed watching the play," Linda advised, ignoring them both with some degree of sadness evident as Danny refocused on his wife and slipped onto the couch next to her while reaching over to wrap his arm around her shoulders as he received and 'I told you so' huff from his sister. "I lost track of time, but Jack said he recorded it too."

"That's okay," Eddie reassured before slipping out of her shoes and walking over. "It was… well it was something," she chuckled trying deliberately to keep the mood light. "Poor Mary and Joseph had a little stage fright, and you know Kaylin… she tried to fill in," she added while walking back in stocking feet and taking a quick peek into the dining room to find Jamie sleeping soundly. "He didn't take any pain meds then?" she questioned quietly in an effort not to disturb him before returning to the front room.

"No, he wanted to try to stay awake for it, but that didn't happen so just the antibiotics," Linda informed her. "You need to watch for any reaction… hives, swelling, trouble breathing. All those are signs of anaphylactic shock and can happen up to a couple of hours after the dose, but he hasn't had any issues with it so far so that's probably not gonna happen," she cautioned. "I wrote everything down on the chart. He can have a dose of the oral prescription whenever he wakes up and wants it or I can come back tonight before we leave to go home and give him the stronger stuff so he can sleep through the night again."

"I think you should plan on that," Erin interjected before lacing her disdain in the next comment. " _Someone_ needs to make sure he's taking his meds and getting rest."

"He _is_ getting rest, Erin… _obviously,"_ Eddie frowned with a nod back towards the hall while taking a deep breath and reminding herself of that promise to Eva to keep her temper in check. "And I've never told him not to take his meds," she spelled out clearly before making yet another effort to ignore the strife. "Thanks, Linda… I really appreciate your help, especially since I know you haven't been feeling well," she added with a sincere sympathetic look that the older woman read clearly. "I'll let you know how he's doing later. Addison said she'd drop by this afternoon too to do his RT if she was able… she's going out to dinner with George's family. God bless them… I wonder how many times they're going to live through the story of the ring," she added.

"Well, Addie's always had a way with Jamie… so maybe _she'll_ talk some sense into him," Erin dug back deliberately and smirked inwardly at the expected twitch, knowing the mention of that former relationship was equivalent of nails on a chalkboard for her sister-in-law.

"Ay yi yi… and that's our cue, Linda," Danny sighed as it was obvious this discussion was spiraling down in a big way and the end was a foregone conclusion now. "C'mon," he ordered his sister as he stood up in an effort to diffuse the situation, anyway. "That's enough; the kid's asleep… we need to get over to Dad's house. You can come back later… if they'll have you," he added under his breath with a contentious frown. "Eddie, call if you need help with anything. If it's okay, we'll bring the boys over for a few minutes after dinner… they miss their Uncle Jamie."

Unfortunately his efforts were already too late.

"ERIN REAGAN, JAMIE IS NOT A CHILD! More importantly, he's not _your_ child! Will you please stop treating him that way! He's your grown up _brother!"_ Eddie finally snapped back as the line was crossed even as she cursed those very words coming out of her own mouth, knowing she had been guilty of doing the same and worse. "You might not like it, but he's _my_ husband and aside from him _I'm_ the best judge of how he feels and what he wants now!" she hissed as her Serbian temper flared before she moved off into the kitchen to lean on the counter with a hand on her belly and stared out of the window into the back yard where Kaylin's swing set lay buried under a thick layer of snow and ice… the swingset which Jamie had built himself over the course of two weekends and their daughter had spent countless hours playing on the past fall while her parents sat on the deck watching and talking about the new baby and what the future might hold for their growing family. Certainly none of what was currently happening had even been a blip on their radar, and all of their optimistic dreams were in jeopardy. Eddie bit her lip to hold the tears at bay at that realization, determined not to back down to Erin while keeping the discussion contained and quiet so as to not wake her husband. "He needed to be with his daughter… that's the best medicine for him right now, and I'm sorry if you can't see that."

"What I see, _Eddie,"_ her sister-in-law shot back with emphasis as she continued to press once more. "Is that he pushed himself all week to come home too soon so he wouldn't disappoint _you,_ and now he's exhausted, not taking his meds like he should be and setting himself up to slide backwards. He should have stayed at Columbia," she asserted. "That's what would have been best."

"Well he didn't; he's home now… in _our_ home and I will not have anyone question that in front of him, or _you_ will no longer be welcome here," Eddie challenged evenly in no uncertain terms this time as despite her earlier resolve this continued conflict was pushing her to the limit as the real emotional impact of what she and Jamie were facing together as husband and wife and parents was hitting her hard. "There, I said it! Are you happy now?! You know what though, Erin? I know you don't believe it, but I love him so much that I will not be the one to make him chose between the two of us. For now, Danny's right... I think it's best if you leave. Next time call first and make sure Jamie's awake, I'm not here and my mother is available to let you in, otherwise you can visit him at Columbia since that's where you prefer he'd be anyway!" she added as the dam broke and she ran past a trio of shocked Reagans to go upstairs and cry face down into her pillow alone.

###

"Helluva day… ho ho ho," Danny grumbled as he crawled onto the bed for some quiet time later that evening with his wife at their home in Staten Island as she was keeping herself busy and sitting up with a lap table going through their Christmas cards to reconcile them with a previous address list on her laptop to add anyone new or update friends who had moved for next year. "Surprised Erin made it outta there in one piece," he remarked. "Wasn't sure if Pop, Eva or my Dad were gonna be the one to take her out back when they heard about it… thought the old man swallowed that mustache of his when he started coughing at the table and we all know what a Hungarian death stare looks like now," he shivered. "Linda, it was really nice of you to stay with Eddie until her mom came home to be with her after all that," he admitted as he reached over and gave her a peck on the cheek, relieved that she seemed just a tiny bit more at peace with their current situation. "She really needed someone who understands, but I know it's hard especially today because of… you know. You're the best."

"Danny… I'm not heartless. I couldn't leave her alone… not like that again," Linda chided with a sad sigh as she pushed aside a few out-of-state envelopes she didn't recognize, intent on asking her husband about them later now. "I already felt guilty because of what happened at Dr. Geisner's office the other day, I mean after I made you leave her there when you'd promised Jamie… then of course the Jeep broke down on the side of the road. I thought Erin would handle it…" she paused. "No, that's not right," she admitted as she closed the lid of the laptop so they could have a talk. "To be really honest, I was all wrapped up in myself because of what we were going through and so jealous I didn't care about what happened to Eddie at that point… not even if she got bad news about their baby too," she added in a tight whisper. "And they did… and now I feel really terrible about that… it's so wrong I couldn't look at her in the face, Danny. I couldn't admit I was there and tell her why you left… I just couldn't yet, but now I feel like a big, mean, two-faced liar that needs to go to confession every day for the rest of my life."

"Linda, no one can blame you for that," he tried to assure as he drew her closer. "It was a shock for both of us. My head wasn't on straight either, and you were… you are… just feeling, not thinking. I should have known better after what Erin pulled with that damn form…" he trailed off. "But all I was worried about was you. She doesn't know about us then? But you said they did get news too? Did she tell you what it was? Is it bad?" he pried gently with concern for his brother's family.

"Maybe..." Linda answered. "Maybe it's a lot worse than what we heard from the doctor," she admitted sadly.

"Worse?" he gasped. "What…?!"

"The baby's kidneys are showing signs of problems," she explained generally. "They're enlarged, so that means they might not be working right and that can cause the fluid level to be low around her throughout the pregnancy… if it gets severe at the end…" she trailed off while looking away and leaving the worst unsaid.

"Her?" Danny caught on quickly. "It's another little girl like Kaylin? A sister?" he asked and choked up as that bit of knowledge just made everything all too real and now even more devastating. "I thought they didn't want to know."

"A girl, that's what they were told… the tech wasn't supposed to say, but she was new and slipped," she sighed. "Eddie made me promise not to get her in trouble."

"Lin, can't they do something?"

"Sometimes… Dr. Geisner recommended a specialist at Boston Children's, but if it doesn't improve and there's still not enough fluid in the sac with them, the lungs don't develop and there's nothing that can be done when they're born… they pass almost right away. It's rare… I mean there's like a one percent chance or less even now that they know it might be an issue, but Eddie found out the other day that her levels are already borderline low. That's really early for it to happen already and they're gonna have to watch her like a hawk the whole time now… she could end up on bed rest for weeks or months only to…" she trailed off in tears. "It's terrible, Danny… I've seen it happen… I mean I work at a hospital. Somebody always manages to hit the lottery no matter what the odds are, right? Look at us and Jamie…"

"Oh, God in heaven," he breathed. "I mean that's all he's thinking about now, isn't it? That one percent… you know how he is. No wonder the kid's so bent on being home with her and Kaylin… he was probably ready to crawl there to be with her when he heard," he reasoned before laying back and staring at the ceiling in guilt. "Some help we've been... his family. We really had his back, didn't we? I ditched Eddie and then my sister goes and opens up her big mouth to make it worse. Does he know what happened today after church yet? He'll kill her when he hears about that and no one will ever find the body," he worried. "She should look into witness protection while she has the chance."

"No, he woke up after Eddie started to calm down so I just went downstairs and we talked while I covered for her… I told him she was up in their room napping. Eva came home with your father then and they took over to get him up for supper. Eddie was walking down the steps and gave me a hug and thanked me for being there before I left. I can't believe she kicked Erin out of the house like that though… it was... pretty terrific," Linda admitted with a smug smile. "I'm sorry… I mean I love her, but I'll admit I've wanted to do that myself once or twice before."

"I gotta talk to Erin and get her to tone it down," he declared while reaching for his phone on the nightstand. "Does Dad know that last part about the baby?" he asked. "He didn't seem too worried today."

"I don't think so… not the latest. Eva knows, but Eddie said she didn't want to bring it up to the rest of us because of Jamie coming home… she said all they can do now anyway is check with an ultrasound every few weeks and go to Boston next month if Dr. Geisner feels like it's needed, but she didn't want everyone worrying about it over Christmas. She opened up to me because she was so upset and promised to talk to Frank with her mom tonight though."

"That's good," Danny answered in relief at not having to hold another secret for long and he was gratified that his wife was at least able to talk with Eddie about her situation now… perhaps in time they could lean on each other in a womanly way again. "Who would have thought that Eva would be here living with them and taking care of things at the house a few months ago when they were fighting at the wedding," he mused. "You know she even made dinner with Pop at the house this afternoon when Erin was too wound up to help and went upstairs to hide in her room. In like a half hour she whipped up a spicy rubbed leg of lamb off the grill with sweet peppers and some kind of thick yogurt sauce she brought from home with these little bits of black stuff floating around… it was amazing. Better than Erin's dry pot roast or Pop's duck any day. Gramps said the Hungarians love their cumin and hot paprika… they've been trading recipes and she's got him hooked on some new restaurant uptown now too. Wish I could have brought you some leftovers, but after she heard what happened she took them home to make sandwiches for Jamie and Eddie's supper."

"That's okay," Linda sighed. "I'm not really in the mood for something spicy like that… not today," she pondered and recalled seeing the recipe for such a dish on the counter in the kitchen when downstairs making some tea for Eddie. "Wait! She took that home for Jamie!" she gasped suddenly while remembering one of the main ingredients. "OH NO! Danny give me your phone now!"

###

"Mom, this was so yummy. Thank you so much for making it for us tonight. You've been such a big help to everyone today," Eddie sighed with contentment as the three sat in the living room watching while Kaylin turned her attention to the some of the new books she had received while sharing a casual dinner of sandwiches and soup around the coffee table. Frank had taken his leave with a promise to return later as Jamie was safely tucked into the comfortable recliner after being talked into a minimal dose of his pain meds since he was determined to make his time at home as clear as possible in spite of the added discomfort he was feeling. With the exception of Erin's ejection, the afternoon had remained a bit quieter than anticipated as Danny had elected to keep the boys out of the fray with the intention of having them visit Jamie on Tuesday now when things had died down a bit and Nicki had been too floored by her mother's reported actions to dare come over by herself and be forced to explain why. In the end it was just Henry and Frank who dodged questions about his sister's absence... reporting that she was worried she might be coming down under the weather with something while the older pair of men spent a few hours over at the house once Linda had gone home with her family. "You even managed to work in Jamie's yogurt requirement," Eddie smiled. "See honey, eating the things on your list doesn't have to be hard and Mom even mixed a less spicy version for us so it doesn't upset our little Irish-blooded munchie this time."

"I'll give you that, Eva," Jamie admitted to his mother-in-law as he pushed his mostly empty plate over on the tray while pausing to absentmindedly scratch his chest which was becoming increasingly itchy despite the soft shirt he was wearing. "The meal was really good… best I've had in weeks. Anyone who can make something edible out of that plain white, industrial-strength caulk Eddie bought instead of yogurt has got to be a master chef."

"You're supposed to eat high protein and have lots of extra calcium with every meal," his wife retorted with a frown. "That brand is rated the highest in both; I researched it online!" she insisted. "Besides, I bought bok choy, fortified tofu, okra, broccoli, green beans, almonds, and sardines too! They're all on the list Marguerite gave me! You're the one that always wanted to eat healthy, so what's the problem now?"

"Sardines and fortified tofu," Jamie raised an eyebrow. "Yummy. I'd like to see you come up with a recipe for those two."

"Well, I'll see what I can do, Jamison," Eva acknowledged with a small smile of relief that the conversation remained light considering the events of the day which to this point her son-in-law was still being held in the dark over. "Can I get you something else? You look a little flushed… Edit, pull that heavy blanket back off of him, it is already warm in here with the fireplace lit. Perhaps a little vanilla ice cream for dessert… that to my knowledge also contains such ingredients so long as it is not that dreadful flavor my lány desires."

"Avery's Down East New England-style Chocolate Double Fudge Brownie Blizzard," Eddie rattled off with a happy chuff as she blissfully considered the half gallon container of her favorite treat which had somehow found its way into her grocery cart along with Jamie's more bland selections. "Mm-hmm yummy yum, that sounds so good," she added while getting up to do as her mother advised before her eyes sharpened with a start as she noticed several large blotchy, raised areas rapidly appearing on her husband's face and hands even while he reached up to pull the irritating neckline of his shirt away as he cleared his throat. "Jamie!" she gasped while remembering Linda's cautions from earlier in the day regarding possible side effects to the antibiotics. "OH NO! You're breaking out in hives! Mom! He's having a reaction to the medicine! They told me if that happens he might not be able to breathe… we need to get the Epi-Pen and call an ambulance!" she panicked as Eva ran back from the kitchen when she heard the tone of her daughter's voice while Kaylin immediately dove behind the sofa in response to the same.

"Eddie, honey, no… I'm fine," Jamie urged as he pushed himself up a bit although he had to admit his throat had begun to burn and tighten in a familiar way. "See? I don't need to go back to the hospital," he insisted with a frown when he noticed where his daughter had gone and focused on that instead. "Sweetness, come out here… please? Daddy's okay, baby," he assured with a raspy cough even as all the color drained out of his wife's face.

"JAMIE, NO! WE NEED HELP!" she cried once more as her phone began to ring on the table and she picked it up, fully intending to dial 911 before noticing Danny's caller ID on the screen.

"Eddie!" Linda's voice came through as she answered on reflex. "Don't let Jamie eat the yogurt sauce!" she advised directly on point, realizing time was of the essence. "I saw the recipe on the counter this afternoon. It has kalamata olives in it!"

"MOM!" Eddie screeched as she whipped around to face Eva who was staring back with a shocked look on her face. "You put olives in the yogurt?! I TOLD YOU HE'S ALLERGIC TO THEM!"

"Oh crap," Jamie sighed as he continued to scratch in discomfort while it became abundantly clear why these symptoms had occurred and exactly what was to be done about it now since his usual reaction to the fruit was annoying, but not life-threatening. "Ed, please calm down then," he begged as he focused on the mother-daughter conflict that was flaring up as fast as the bumps on his skin. "It's alright, she didn't know."

"SHE DID TOO KNOW! I told her at Thanksgiving when we used the stupid kumquats in the cranberry sauce that everyone hated instead!" Eddie cried as she turned back to the phone. "It's too late, Linda, he already ate them but we know what to do. Thanks for trying to warn us, I was just about to call the ambulance," she added before hanging up abruptly. "I TRUSTED YOU!" she railed at her mother once more.

"Jamison! I'm so sorry!" Eva gasped as she wrung her hands with a guilty conscience now that she recalled that conversation. "I forgot what was said and when Edit told me to use the yogurt if possible… it was something I made before for Armin… I did not think!"

"Eva, it's fine… or it will be. It's not your fault, really," he assured with emphasis as he sought to calm the volatile situation down. "There's a bottle of Benadryl in the medicine cabinet upstairs. Would you mind getting that? It's all I need to make these go away," he pointed to his hives and then sighed while watching his mother-in-law rush off to retrieve the sleep-inducing antihistamine knowing that a strong dose would be required to clear up this level of reaction. "Ed, honey… c'mon. I'll be fine. Please don't be mad at your mom. I took the pain meds hours ago and this'll knock me out for the night, anyway. Let's get sweetness out in the open again and me ready for bed. So much for a quiet homecoming," he sighed and wondered just how long it would be… if ever... until things returned to normal once more.

* * *

 _Oh well, that whole day kind of went upside down for everyone from the get go, didn't it? At least Linda and Eddie seem like they've struck on a common chord together while in the upcoming chapters the conflict with Erin will soon come to a head (I know I've been kinda tough on her in this one, but they'll eventually come good, don't worry) and Eva's troubles with her daughter have only just begun as that tenuous trust the two have been developing is crushed in short order. All that and the charming Dexter will be back in the picture as well when Eddie reluctantly returns to work and Danny gets another jolt from the past before he tries to do the same as Mason begins some more psychological warfare._


	66. Chapter 66

Chapter 66

"Hives, huh? Boy, that stinks on top of everything else," Aaron Snyder, the visiting physical therapist noted as he kept up his usual small talk after arriving early the next morning to check on Jamie and continue his light PT while Eddie could be heard rushing around upstairs to get ready for her scheduled first shift at the front desk of the 12th precinct, having spent a restless night downstairs once more on her less-than-comfortable cot mattress. "So you took the antihistamine and laid off the other meds last night, right?"

"Yeah, how'd you guess?" Jamie gritted and shut his eyes against the pain being triggered as Aaron removed the brace and began to work on flexing that right hip and his lower back which had frankly been throbbing and causing him the most physical discomfort in the last few days.

"Well, first because you're still breathing so you didn't totally suppress your respiratory system, and second 'cause I know you're trying to be a tough guy and do this on your own without the chemical assistance… admirable maybe in a naïve kinda way, but I'm telling ya… you're just making it tougher on yourself," Aaron chided as he began working softly while his patient winced and held his breath before blowing it out with force. "See how much flexion you lost here in just one day? Jamie, this is a piece of cake compared to what you're gonna face when we start bending that knee and working on strengthening those damaged quadriceps next week so we can eventually get you back on your feet. Take it from me, there's no way to will yourself through that. We need to push past your comfort zone every day to make progress, and if you can't do that the rehab is not going to work."

"Don't like the drugs," Jamie insisted as the range of motion movements were continued and he heard his wife come bounding down the steps and arrive in the doorway, but refused to look or acknowledge her in the middle of this for fear of disclosing just how much pain he was really in. There was no way could he tell her or Aaron there was another reason for his decision… one that would be necessary when he found himself back at Columbia with a covert investigation to carry out. There were too many deserving men and women with a very special doctor there that were counting on him now even though they were completely unaware of that fact… not to mention the financial stability his own family deserved since despite what had happened he still could not see himself happy in a full-time law position. An assignment as a special agent with the FBI, even if it was at a desk some of the time, was a lot closer to staying a cop and making a difference than pouring over boring legal corporate contracts for the rest of his life, no matter how lucrative it was. With the way narcotics played games with his mind, he wouldn't be able to do anything under the influence and had to learn to limit his intake to the bare minimum he could withstand. That started here at home, especially in front of his daughter and wife. "They make… my mind… numb… useless… ow… can't do that…. here… S'okay to... take them… at night… to sleep," he panted as Aaron continued the rhythmical stretching.

"Jamie!" Eddie huffed from the doorway, having overheard the majority of the conversation while running downstairs with her bag ready for work, already on the verge of being late for her shift after scrambling to get ready which would no doubt draw Dexter's attention and ire once more. "You need to listen to him!" she urged as she walked over to the bed and considered Erin's stance on the matter… thankful her sister-in-law was no where near to hear those vindicating comments or they would no doubt be held over her for all time. "What good is all this if he can't help you get better?!"

"I'm fine," came the maddening, pig-headed, stubborn reply back and Eddie had to remind herself of just who she was dealing with… that infamous Reagan gene coming to the fore again. "None of this is doing any good right now… for any of us!" he snapped before regret at that undeserved barb immediately set in. "M'm sorry, Ed… I shouldn't of... it's just… it hurts right now. Please, just go before you're late for roll call… can't afford… to get another… rip on your record… s'all we need," he added irritably in between grunting breaths.

"Well, first I brought a fresh set of clothes down for you, sunshine," she answered back with a frown at his now testy attitude. "Seems like you need some help changing out of those cranky pants unless you want Mom to do that when she's done in the shower," she threatened knowing that was sure to freak him out a little before pulling out the big guns. "Or better yet, Addison texted and said she'd be here shortly too, so you have another option there. Maybe you'd prefer her," she added flatly with the expected accompanying twitch.

"Seriously, Ed?" Jamie grumped at his wife's jealous insinuation before wincing as his bad leg was returned down to the bed and Aaron stepped around her to rummage through the equipment bags he had brought with him and stored on the other side of the room.

"If you're running late, why don't you just leave the stuff on the table over there and I'll help him change and get into the chair when we've finished," the helpful therapist offered as he pulled out his prize… a small battery-powered handheld unit with a number of electrodes attached to it. "Since you want to go au natural... how about meeting me halfway and trying this?" he offered.

"Naked electric shock therapy?" Jamie quipped petulantly as he eyed the device before sinking his head back down to the pillow. "Sure, why not? Strip me down, juice me up and put me out of my misery."

"Hopefully it does just that," Aaron replied back with a smirk before explaining as Eddie looked at him suspiciously. "Transcutaneous electrical nerve stimulation… TENS for short. This little baby uses small electrical pulses produced by the stimulator to reduce pain. The electrodes are placed on the skin in the area you want to treat and attached to these leads so then Jamie will be able to dial the pulse width, frequency and intensity up or down to the point where it modulates or suppresses the nerve signals going from his hip to the brain. It's perfectly safe," he assured. "Maybe we can still get some of this done without the drugs… at least for this week here at home. Worth a shot? C'mon, let's give it a try."

"Yeah, what the hell... go ahead," Jamie sighed as he relented before focusing on his wife and softening the bristles a little. "Get out of here, Ed… I'll be alright now," he urged. "Don't be late for work… I'll have people in and out all day, whether I want them or not," he acknowledged, fully expecting visits from any number of worried family members on top of the scheduled therapy sessions and Linda's anticipated arrival around eleven. "It'll be like Grand Central."

"Well, just make sure you get some rest too," she advised with apprehension, completely reluctant to let him out of her sight and in her mother's charge again after what had happened the night before, however, she likewise toned down the animosity before coming over to give him a kiss goodbye on the forehead. "I do love you, lambchop… and so does the munchie and Kaylin."

"Love you all more," he assured and then listened to her make a beeline to the front door and back to her life as a cop that he was pretty certain at this point he would never share with her again.

###

"Honey, I'm going to get going then," Danny called up the steps that morning before biting into his toasted half cinnamon bagel to hold it in his teeth while slipping his arms into his overcoat and pausing to open the closet door to retrieve his off duty gun from the safe. "Are you sure you're gonna be okay driving over to Eddie and Jamie's alone later on?" he asked while still chewing. "I'm just going in today to finish up on those videos," he reminded with little hope anything would come of it considering he and Baez had cleared more than three quarters of the files with nothing to show for it and Danny was quickly losing hope he would ever find the driver that nearly took his brother's life that night. "I could clock off at lunch and drive you since you don't go into work at the hospital until tomorrow. Maria has a couple of days off too since she wrapped up a few more cases last week when I banged in and Carver is off the warpath."

"No, I can do it myself… I'm feeling a little better today," Linda answered as she came down the steps still dressed in her robe while carrying the laptop and cards she had been working on the night before. Even though there was still sadness evident in the lines on her face, she had resolved to try to put things ahead of her own feelings in an effort to move past the hurt after agreeing with her husband to hold off any further discussion of how they moved forward until there was time to process this privately… a fact that instilled a little ember of hope and kept it burning since he had not shut down talk of other possibilities. Given her neuro diagnosis, they had both agreed that a try for another pregnancy was not in the cards. "The boys are still sleeping, but they'll be okay here at home while I'm gone," she assured before pulling out the two envelopes she had meant to ask him about. "Danny, did you see these?" she asked and handed them over with a morning kiss on the cheek. "One's from Tennessee and one from Kentucky… they're new and I don't recognize the last names… plus now that I think about it the cards sounded more like thank you notes."

"Aw, Linda… do I ever really look at that stuff? Just do whatever you want," he sighed without glancing at them, having never had interest in that particular part of holiday etiquette. "Crap, I almost forgot my coffee… I don't know anyone from down there I don't think," he added on the way back into the kitchen.

"Well, I gotta know if I need to add them to my list," she insisted. "Mr. and Mrs. Robert Feltz from Lincoln, Tennessee and the McClaine's from Paris, Kentucky."

"Feltz and McClaine?" Danny stopped as if the wind had been knocked out of him and went pale as those names rang an instant bell through his heart and he put his mug back down on the counter while grabbing it to support himself as the vision of two fellow Marines flashed across his mind… a pair good-hearted, fresh-faced country boys who had grown up in the same general area and gone through the reserves at Fort Campbell together only to find themselves stationed in the same fateful unit in Fallujah along with a slightly older, nontraditional soldier who had sought to work out his anger over having his own city attacked by terrorists by enlisting and coming after them himself. He remembered explaining that to someone once… how after the Towers had come down he had been full of hate. Very much so. Like every New Yorker he had wanted revenge and decided to go active in the Marines and deploy to Iraq. Lesson learned from that decision after two tours and all the madness he saw? Aside from the crazy ones, we all want pretty much the same thing. We want the chance to put food on our tables, a roof over our heads and happy, healthy kids… just like his own brother and wife did.

"Yeah, remember them now?" Linda asked and brought him back to the present as she walked into the dining room and pulled the two cards that had come with them from where they were taped along the archway.

Remember… did he remember? It's not like he could ever forget two of the men who had continued to haunt his dreams all these years later… the fifteenth anniversary of a tragic day for all involved coming up later that summer.

"I… can I see those?" he stuttered as he forced himself to recover. Surely there was some explanation for this… a memo he missed, some kind of newsletter he neglected to peruse. Why else would the families of these men be contacting him now?

"This one from the McClaine's says 'God Bless you for remembering Michael,' and the Feltz's said something about being honored to send something to represent Steven," she puzzled. "I wondered what that was about. Sorry I didn't mention these earlier… I was just kinda going through the motions and didn't pay attention… they came late last week," she revealed which immediately explained why they had remained under the radar. "Know them?"

"Yeah, I think…" he trailed off while puzzling over the correspondence. "Guys I served with," he explained briefly. "Their families anyway. Not sure why they would be writing me now though."

"Oh, well, maybe there's some kind of reunion coming up," Linda assumed without thinking that statement through, given the fact that her husband had been the lone surviving member of his unit after a fateful firefight had left the others as mere memories now.

"Yeah, I don't know… maybe I missed something," he conceded while staring at the distinctly feminine writing that obviously came from the hands of two mothers who had seen their own share of loss and grief over the past years. "Let me take these and I'll see if I can figure it out, okay?"

"Alright," she agreed after putting a hand on his chest and giving him a final goodbye kiss before moving off into the kitchen while still so consumed by her own circumstances she had failed to notice the effect all this had on her husband. "Just don't forget about them."

"I won't," he murmured under his breath as he clutched those cards tighter now. "I never did."

###

"No, dear, he's fine… just asleep now," Eva tried to assure her daughter with a sigh after yet another expected check in during her break time when she was out from under the abrasive Sergeant Dexter's direct sight line. "He dozed off in the living room after that Addison girl was finished… I believe she just plainly exhausted him with all that constant banter. Honestly, Edit, I will never understand what Jamison ever saw in her or how this other one could have asked for her hand already," she tutted quietly. "Kaylin is over with Henry since the morning to visit that cat so it is quiet here. I'll go pick them up and bring them here for the afternoon when Linda arrives… he is preparing lunch for all of us," she assured, knowing that her daughter had lost faith in her ability to do that for the time being given the great olive fiasco of the evening before.

"Okay," Eddie breathed in relief as so far the day's plan had seemed to come off better than their previous attempts. "Just make sure Jamie's eating at least some of the things on his list and he needs to drink one of those protein shakes they sent along. Was he upset about the car?" she wondered as it had been necessary for her to pull the precious Mustang out of the garage that morning and bring it to the precinct with her in order to provide her mother with transportation to ferry Kaylin and her great-grandfather around.

"No, dear… he did not say, or perhaps he did not realize," Eva informed her. "If so, he is not concerned… it is not as if he will be able to drive it soon, correct?" she observed as her daughter's heart fell at that realization knowing how much her husband loved that car. "Edit, I must leave for a few hours this afternoon, but Linda and Henry have assured they will be fine staying. There is an offer on my house in Rochester that I have decided to accept as it is well above my asking price," she explained, knowing that would send a kink into things here given that it would be necessary to travel north soon to pack up her belongings and put them in storage. "The buyers are quite anxious to move so I must drive up to the agency in Park Slope and sign a few forms. I will not be long."

"That's okay as long as he's not alone," Eddie replied. "Could you get that list of things I left on the counter for the party tomorrow night and stop at the store to pick them up while you're out? Just juice boxes and some snacks. One of the other moms is taking care of everything else. It's still a surprise though so don't tell him."

"Edit, are you sure?" Eva sighed. "Jamison seems so... fragile, still," she worried. "I'm afraid it will be too much. Perhaps just have a few of the children come visit him here later in the week."

"No, Mom… they're a team, he's their coach. Besides, it's not too far away, and this is as much for Kaylin as it is Jamie. I want them to be able to enjoy something together before he has to go away from us again. Aaron said starting next week the rehab is going to get really hard and that he'll need a lot to get through it. I know he'll be stubborn and try to do it without taking any drugs so there has to be something else… something to look forward to. He needs to be her dad and have a reason to push through that so he can get better," she insisted.

"What you want and what is possible are not the same now it seems, my lány," Eva reminded her daughter gently. "Be honest, Edit, and say it is you that needs to see him move forward at this time," she chided gently. "It is understandable."

"No, Mom… that's _not_ why I'm doing this!" Eddie insisted as her temper flared once more. "It's not about ME! Now you sound like Erin! Why can't anyone accept that I know what's best for Jamie? I feel like I'm the only one that notices he's been really depressed lately… he smiles with the kids. They make him laugh… that's all I want to see!" she insisted even as it was clear from the look she was getting from Sergeant Dexter across the hall that break time was quickly drawing to a close and she would no doubt be reprimanded if she returned to her post late. "I have to go now, Mom. Will you take care of those things at the store for me? Please?" she begged. "And tell Jamie I love him when he wakes up?"

"Yes, my édesem," Eva conceded as she worried over all of this added stress on a daughter who was already facing a frightening reality of her own with her pregnancy and did not want to add to it by opposing her over this issue. "And you are not the only one that can see these things. I will do as you wish… that I can promise."

###

"Feltz and McClaine..." Danny pondered as he looked at those envelopes again while sitting alone at his desk at the 5-4 and waiting for yet another video to load. Steve and Mickey… Corporal Jimmy Beal, who had saved his life in that last instant… together they had made up one of the two four-man fire teams under their squad leader Lieutenant Bixler… all of those memories were racing back from behind a wall until they were so close it was only their faces left in his field of view… images that no doubt would now revisit him in the darkness of night as they did whenever something brought them back to the surface of his mind once more. What had possessed their families to contact him now after all this time when he had just about managed to tuck them into some dark recess behind all the horrors he had witnessed on the job here in the years since… was it really a surprise to anyone that his nightmares persisted? He was human, right? But now there were other things to be worried about… a brother that was possibly permanently afflicted with a baby on the way that was also facing challenges, a wife that was heartbroken…

A soft beep drew his attention back to the screen for what felt like the hundredth time already that day and he hit the play button after shoving those cards in the top desk drawer and closing it to remove them from his sight. A quick search had provided full contact information for both men's parents, but he lacked the courage to follow through with a phone call to fish for information, afraid to come off as uninformed and with everything else going on decided to put any further action off for another day. All of that was soon forgotten though as for the second time today he spotted that telltale light-colored bow that indicated he had found a file from the desired two week time frame of the current year.

"C'mon… c'mon… this has gotta be the one…" he murmured while clicking through the irritatingly slow controls of the ancient software and trying to fast forward through the day. "There! There they are!" he exclaimed enthusiastically as he spotted the familiar figures of Rick and Jamie walking on the sidewalk, obviously lighthearted and goofing around as they made their way down the street towards the corner and that fateful crosswalk which was mercifully out of view of the camera. Still Danny could not help but attempt to change the inevitable outcome in some way, shape or form as his heart pounded, and he slammed his hand down on the desk. "Look out, kid! Watch yourself crossing the…!"

The rest of the words never passed his lips as Danny stared with a mix of shock and horror at the screen as lighter colored, easily recognizable car model blew into the black and white video picture with speed and continued straight down the block, never turning at the corner or affording any type of clear view of the driver or license plate while he flashed back on patches of that conversation he had held with his father that night when Frank had broken down in front of him.

" _Then why now?" Frank had demanded as he proposed the impossible. "Maybe we've been looking at this the wrong way. We've been waiting to hear him say something else because we've assumed it couldn't be true, but he's sure he saw that car… that part of his recollection has not changed in spite of all the pain medication and delusions otherwise. What if it's not a dream or a flashback to that time in college?"_

" _He also said he thought Joe was coming to take him home... he was in shock after just becoming a hood ornament," Danny reminded with an uneasy twist in his stomach._

" _That car... no, of course not, Dan," Frank admitted with a sad sigh and a shake of the head as he recognized how unlikely that scenario actually was and considered without fondness for the first time that ancient vehicle of his that had been passed down through his youngest sons, having no idea how close he and Danny were to the actual truth at that moment. "Obviously it's gone, but one like it maybe… the only thing I can think of in all of this that makes sense and explains what happened is that Jamie would freeze if he saw something like that. You know what that car meant to him… to Joe."_

" _And do you know what a coincidence it would be for that to happen?" Danny asked, trying to convince himself more than his father at this point. "Besides…"_

" _...I don't believe in coincidences," Frank followed with a knowing nod and a defeated muttered confession just before breaking into shaking sobs in front of him._

His father was right, it had been there in front of them all this time and this was no coincidence especially given the fact the names Malevsky and Gonsalves were resurfacing… now the video of a speeding Chevelle and the corresponding glass samples confirmed it. Someone was playing mind games with them. Jamie _had_ remembered the truth about what happened and had been trying to tell them that all along, but no one had been willing to listen and that brought them no closer to who, and WHY? Why now after all this time were these wounds being opened again?

"Crap," Danny muttered as he rubbed his hands over his face as an instant migraine of stress hit coupled with the other unexplained events of the day. Unsure if he was doing the right thing or not at the time, he had made the decision to keep the results of the glass samples to himself until it could be corroborated with video evidence and promised not bring it back up to his father or brother unless it was necessary. Now it was, and the question was how? Jamie remained weak and vulnerable, his father clearly shaken… still there was no one else. This was all before Maria's time, besides she was in the department and something like this really needed to be handled from the outside. The only other person he trusted had taken herself out of the picture when Jackie had shut him down not too long ago.

"Dad, it has to be Dad," he concluded at last and gathered up his few bits of evidence, determined it was now time to lay all of his cards out on the table.

* * *

 _Mm, so the clues are finally starting to come together for Danny as he focuses on trying to find out who hurt his brother, but little does he know that the attention has now been directed squarely on him and Mason will do his best to see that the older Reagan brother continues to be haunted by his past including events which will eventually explain why he had always been so opposed to Jamie's involvement in anything military. Next though, Danny invites himself over for one of those Monday night beers which will quickly raise Frank's suspicion and bring him into the loop._

 _Special shout out to Laura Louisa Lewis for including the cranky pants comment in a PM which was so fitting it just had to be utilized somewhere. :)_


	67. Chapter 67

Chapter 67

"Hey, Dad," Danny issued a familiar greeting after letting himself in the back door of the family home later that evening when he knew his father would be there and hopefully alone since his Henry did not appear to be present and what needed to be said was better off without an audience at this point.

"Well, hey yourself," Frank looked up with some surprise to see his oldest son enter while he sat at the kitchen table in front of his open laptop pouring over some of the day's reports, still dressed in his customary three piece suit although the tie and coat had been removed and the collar loosened. "What are you up to? Stopping by to look for leftovers? Eva took that lamb home but there's still plenty of other things in the fridge."

"Yeah, I know… heard all about what went down over there; she'll never forget the kid's allergic to olives again. Where's Pop… I'm guessing still at Jamie's? Linda went home a couple of hours ago," Danny noted and deliberately ignored the first question he had been asked before a low, rumbling warning growl emanated from the pantry and reminded him there was indeed another presence to consider. "Aw, damn it… what's _he_ still doing here?" he asked irritably while moving slowly, but purposefully to the other side of the kitchen island in an effort to keep a solid barrier between himself and the clearly irate cat as Bear emerged from the doorway with a pronounced swagger complete with a fully fluffed up tail and arched back while staring back at his declared nemesis through warning-filled flashing green iridescent eyes.

"He is our esteemed guest and chief security detail until Jamie goes back to Columbia," Frank informed with a wry smirk evident as the corner of his thick mustache lifted upwards while he observed Danny's obvious unease over the animal's directed look. "Seems to have a preference for sleeping on your bed upstairs every night too… Kaylin thinks it's because he likes you best."

"Yeah, I bet that's the reason… remind me to change the sheets and pillows before I sleep over here next time," Danny huffed as he waited for Bear to lose interest and bound into the living room, no doubt in search of another prime ambush spot, before it was safe to walk over to the refrigerator and grab two longnecks off the top shelf. "I came for this, want one?" he asked while flicking the pair of caps into the garbage.

"Sure," Frank frowned now as he observed his oldest's telling behavior. Clearly this was more than a social call given the tension evident. "What's going on, Danny?" he challenged as he accepted the drink and put it down on the table in front of him. "Nobody comes out here for just a beer. Sunday dinner, sure, but, uh, not Monday night beers. So shoot. Is it Linda?" he asked pointedly since there had been no hiding the fact the day before that his daughter-in-law had been greatly upset about something although he had kept his pledge not to pry and managed to cut Henry short before he even got started. No doubt the older man had taken her to task this afternoon though considering the two had been left alone together to guard Jamie until Eva and Eddie's return.

"That's part of it," Danny admitted softly since his father was aware of some of their current issues, still he had made a promise and was not about to come completely clean about the full extent of what had happened. "She got bad news from the doc this week," he informed plainly. "There's, ah… not going to be another baby," he added truthfully while omitting the other painful details of the pregnancy lost as he stared down at his own drink and started peeling the label off the bottle in one of his stress tells. "We're still talking about other possibilities… I'm not sure if that's what either of us want yet, but I just thought you should know."

"I'm so sorry, Dan," Frank sympathized with their disappointment, knowing full well how devastating news like that could be to a couple. "If there's anything I can do…"

"No, I know," Danny quickly brushed the unpleasant subject away and took another long swig for courage as he continued to stare downward, admittedly afraid to move forward after witnessing his father's previous reaction which had honestly left him shaken to the core last time. "I'd tell you if there was, but that's not why I'm here."

"Okay, so what is it then?" Frank asked nervously as he eyed his reluctant boy… every fiber of his mind now screaming that no doubt there was something even worse about to be revealed if it was bothering him more than what had just been discussed.

"These," Danny divulged as he reached into his pocket and pulled the small bag of glass particles he had retrieved from Mike Becker in forensics that afternoon along with a USB thumb drive containing a converted copy of the video. "These prove that Jamie was telling us the truth about what happened all along," he added as he put them carefully down on the table between them, still without making eye contact with his father. "You were right too… about why he hesitated. It was a Chevelle that hit him in Washington, Dad. One just like ours. The glass matches the right kind of vintage headlamps; I remember how hard Joe had to look for them when he rebuilt her from the ground up. It's all in Mike's report… you can read it, and the video… I found the video, it's right here..." he whispered as he pushed the small drive towards the older man who sat frozen in disbelief. "It can't be a coincidence, not all of it… no way."

"The hell," Frank murmured after a few moments of staring back in shock, thinking he must be imagining things before he picked up the drive and inserted it into his laptop… his eyes likewise misting up after he hit play as he watched the cued up scene of Jamie and Rick walking past the store on their way down to the hotel that cold night, the last few moments his youngest might ever have of such freedom. "BASTARD!" his fist thundered down on the table at the moment the car appeared on the screen and he was quick to backtrack and replay it over and over… his detective brain now whirring on overdrive looking for some missed clue in this damning evidence, but there was none he could decipher with his naked eyes alone. "Did Mike try to…"

"Enhance it?" Danny finished for him as he found the fortitude to look up. "Yeah, that's as good as it gets. A little over a second… he cleared it up enough to show the damage on the right front fender from…" he stopped himself before finishing that morbid thought. "There's nothing else… no tags or stickers, nothing he could make out to give us a clue who this guy was."

"And no shot of the driver from this side of the car," Frank surmised as he rubbed his face. "All the other traffic cameras in the area down."

"Yeah. I reached out to that worthless Detective Fowler in DC again, gave him the description so he could maybe check local body shop records… see if a car like this was brought in for repairs somewhere or maybe racked up parking tickets around that time, but I'm not holding my breath. Somebody took a long time planning this, Dad… somebody with a personal axe to grind against us because of the Blue Templar, and they went after Jamie and his family first."

"The family… you're talking about the Gonsalves tag on the cat," Frank deduced as he glanced towards the living room where Kaylin's most cherished and distinctively large four-footed friend was now purring on the windowsill. "The one at the school that looked just like Bear," he added as his ire was instantly raised that someone would dare threaten his innocent granddaughter like that with clear intent to frighten her.

"Down to the collar he wears, someone knew that… plus her badge, Dad… the one that got thrown out on my doorstep, and Eddie's car," he added as his father's eyes snapped over at that additional bit of information. "The mechanic in Baltimore tried to convince me it was tampered with… that someone who didn't know what they were doing screwed up and wired some kind of short into that circuit to put a drain on the battery, and then that O'Connor guy getting dumped on the same corner where Joe was shot. It's not true though, is it?… Someone knows exactly what they are doing," he asserted. "And what's worse is they're good at it."

"Dear, God," Frank sighed as he stood up and started to pace the floor wondering how all of this had eluded him. "Why now?" he muttered while searching for answers. "There was no one left… I… we made sure of it. We took them all down, disbanded the Templar… there hasn't been so much as another mention of it in all of these years since then. NOW WHY AND WHO?!"

"I got no answers for that," Danny admitted as he sat back and shook his head. "I spent the past three weeks tryin' to convince myself it was all in my head… that Jamie was just lost in the past because of what happened and that all these little things could be explained away, and then I got distracted with what was going on with Linda and took my eye off of it… I just found the video today," he explained so that his father didn't think he had been hiding this from him. "You were so upset with Erin and her damn POA form that one night we were all here so I didn't bring up what Mike told me about the glass because I was afraid it would make things worse without any other proof... and I didn't want any of this to be true, I guess."

"Who else knows besides Mike?" Frank demanded as he turned around. "Someone else at the 5-4? Your partner?"

"About the Templar?" Danny answered. "No, Maria doesn't know anything about that… she just helped me look through the videos to see if we could track down the right one. I mean there were a couple of thousand files so it took forever. I told her what happened to Jamie… I had to let her know why I was gone in the beginning… she wasn't at the squad today when I found it though," he revealed. "But I did talk to Jackie last week to see what she thought."

"Curatola?" his father barked as he spun around again from his continued pacing with more than a hint of suspicion in his voice as it was evident no one was to be trusted now… not even someone who had been like their own in the past.

"Yeah, Jack… c'mon, Dad, you don't think she has something to do with all this, do you?" he flared up in defense of his old partner who had seen him through more than her share of tight spots and investigations without ever letting him down, or so it seemed.

"When?"

"Sunday night… right after we got put on that body dump on Washington and you called to tell me Jamie was awake again after that long surgery. She's who I met up in Queens… lives and works up in Whitestone now with her boyfriend or fiancé I guess. She blew me off… told me she wanted nothing to do with the NYPD anymore, that I looked like hell and was imagining things with this Blue Templar stuff and if I was smart, I would get out too before I cracked... like she did," he paused wide eyed in shock to let those words settle down to the ground.

"She know that your brother was at Columbia at that time?" Frank challenged as he himself had been on a quest over the past weekend to unearth whoever had sent that anonymous leak to the press with Jamie's whereabouts while listing him as likely to die to bring further grief to the family. Surely that was part of this now too. "DID SHE?!"

"I… yeah, I told her," Danny stuttered out as he saw where his father was headed with this and had to admit to himself that the thought had crossed his mind earlier when Linda had brought up who might have a vendetta against them and knowledge of the youngest Reagan's accident. Still, it wasn't possible. "Dad! She was my partner! I know her! There's no way Jackie would be involved with this! It surprised her to hear about what happened to Jamie… I could tell, and besides, she always liked him! Why would she make him a target?"

"Because he was originally, and anyone that wants to get to you or me using the Templar knows we'd drive ourselves crazy trying to find out who hurt him. Did she also tell you she filed a notice with the controller over two months ago to sue the city for upwards of two million dollars for wrongful termination citing mental stress that was not appropriately addressed by the department psychiatrist when she was on the job? That Dr. Grace Meherin and Lieutenant Gormley are also named in the suit? Quite frankly I was surprised to see that she left you out of it. Still trust her completely?"

"She… she what?!" Danny gaped back. "No way! I can't believe she would do something like that! And now someone who has intimate knowledge of the details from the Blue Templar is playing mind games with us, and you think it's her?"

"I'm not prepared to rule anything out this time, Daniel," Frank vowed as he resumed pacing. "She's clearly holding a grudge even though she was offered any number of administrative positions before her furlough ran out, and even then it was months before anyone signed off on her termination. There's no merit to her case, but it's too much of a coincidence as you say. Men I trusted with my life for all those years turned on us and Joe last time too. For now we handle this in house… in _this_ house until I tell you otherwise, understood?" he ordered in a voice that was not to be questioned, although that rarely stopped his oldest from trying.

"Yes, sir, but…" Danny trailed off as he was at an otherwise almost complete loss for words at this shocking turn of events… surely what his father was suggesting couldn't possibly be true. "What about Jamie? We need to tell him, right? He thinks his head is messed up."

"Jamie has more important things to worry about right now," Frank answered finally after some careful thought and a few more rounds of the kitchen floor. "If we tell him about this, he won't go back to stay at Columbia or focus on his rehab… he'll want to be at home protecting his family," he reasoned before making a decision, having no idea that his youngest son was already involved in his own investigation. "No, right now it would only be detrimental to him and his health. I'll arrange for security on the house immediately, and he's virtually untouchable when he's at the medical center. Eddie is safe working at the precinct desk. We'll explain to her it's because of the leak if she spots anything, but for now no one else hears of it… only Pop when he comes home. Am I clear?"

"Yeah, but Dad, she has this crazy idea to take him out tomorrow night to Kaylin's soccer practice… what about that?"

"You'll be there, right?" his father gruffed. "I don't think whoever did this had intentions of actually hurting your brother in that crosswalk. That was a mistake… there would be no reason to use that car if they had intended to kill him. You said yourself that Jamie told you he could have easily stepped out of the way, but he hesitated because of what he saw. No one would have anticipated that. Everything else that has been done to this point… if it is connected… has been mental warfare. Given the fact that this person can't be in more than one place at a time, down in Washington and here to place the cat or tamper with Eddie's car, there must be at least two and whoever is doing this is taking pleasure in it, so perhaps that gives us an edge now on what to focus on. I will be looking into Curatola, but I'm not going to stop there if I rule her out… there's always more possibilities," he added grimly.

"But what about me?" Danny asked, feeling like he was being frozen out of the investigation now… something he definitely wasn't used to or would take lying down. "I can't just sit around and twiddle my thumbs! I found the glass and tracked down the video. What do I do now?"

"You stay on task and approach it from the other side. Try to find that car. There can't be that many '71 Chevelles left in running condition or outlets for parts to restore them. You said yourself that Joe had to search a long time for those headlights when he was working on it… maybe whoever hit Jamie will have to do the same, and he thinks he got away scott clean since the cameras were down, and the hit-and-run case is listed as cold already."

"So he might not bother to cover his tracks all that well now… think about that though," Danny insisted as the worry returned full force. "Whoever did this planned it down to a timed computer glitch… unless you believe that was just a coincidence, and I know you don't. Who has the juice and a beef with us big enough to pull something like that off in another city?"

"I don't know the answer to that question, Dan," Frank admitted as that aspect of the growing size of the conspiracy hit him as well. "I wish I did. It has to be someone with connections down there, but I do know a friend closer to home who can help us figure that part out. We need to get these sons of bitches," he vowed in a familiar threatening way as his son took a final sip of that beer and put it down, ready to tackle his aspect of the case head on.

His father was right about something else, Danny thought… nobody comes out here for just a beer on a Monday night.

* * *

 _Well, I just love when Frank goes all dark and moody like that, but at least he's joined forces with Danny for now, although it looks like they might go off in the wrong direction at first and Jackie just might find herself on the wrong end of the table with the Commissioner at some point. Next, Kaylin displays a bit of un-sweetness-like behavior before Eddie tries to reconnect with her husband and convince a reluctant Jamie that a night out is a good idea._

 _Happy 4th everyone! Stay safe and enjoy!_


	68. Chapter 68

Chapter 68

"C'mon, Daddy… _p'ease_ play a match game with me!" Kaylin begged and tugged on Jamie's arm as he sat dozing off in the living room recliner, thoroughly exhausted after a restless night and the lack of sleep had taken a pronounced toll with another double round of morning therapy sessions from Aaron and Addison topped off with Linda's scheduled visit for bandage changes and antibiotics which had just wrapped up. Once more before all that occurred he had to urge his equally tired wife to leave on time and listen with worry as she rushed out the door in the hope not be late to work.

"Kaylin, édesem," Eva chided from the kitchen where she was preparing lunch, a hearty spinach salad with shredded carrots and fresh cottage cheese, broccoli and mixed dried fruit topped off with a flavorful tuna and chickpea mixture on the side… completely devoid of olives this time. "Sweetheart, your father is sleepy… let him rest now for a little while before we eat. I will play the game with you."

"No! Me want Daddy!" the little girl insisted with a strong little three-year-old huff and a stomp of her foot.

"It's okay, Eva," Jamie assured as he forced his eyes open, determined not to disappoint his daughter after working so hard to gain her trust again. "Just roll the coffee table over here closer and put your cards out, sweetness," he directed the little girl before offering a little challenge considering the two shared an eidetic memory with Frank which made this game of concentration often closely contested even at her young age. "See if you can beat me. What are we matching today?"

"Puppies!" she replied enthusiastically as she hurried back from the closet with one of her favored decks which included twenty-six different pairs of doggie pictures.

"Okay, puppies it is," Jamie agreed as he watched her determinedly mix up the set to the best of her ability and spread the cards out face down. "You go first," he offered.

A Dachshund and a Husky clearly made no match as they were flipped over, but Kaylin carefully marked their locations in her mind and was quick to take advantage when Jamie's try revealed a Great Dane and then the matching wiener dog.

"Me have one!" she declared herself in the lead as she quickly snatched up the pair.

"I think you will not win now, Jamison," Eva observed with interest from over the counter as Kaylin took the next turn and as luck would have it, disclosed the other Husky first so she was already two ahead. "I have seen her claim over half before I get another chance," she added as the next attempt turned over a Labrador and a Dalmation.

"Hm, we'll see about that," Jamie declared as he found the second Dane and smugly flipped over the card he was sure would match, only to find a Pekingese instead.

"Daddy, you wrong!" Kaylin frowned and corrected the error, picking up another pair. "Play nice!" she ordered, not understanding that he was still suffering some mental impairments from any combination of the accident injuries, pain, lack of sleep and medications, and fully expecting that her father would challenge her quick little mind in the game as he always did before.

"I'm sorry, baby… Daddy goofed," he tried to gloss over even though he found it equally disturbing. He was sure that card had been the right one, and it was not often his photographic memory failed him in matters like this. "It's still your turn, go ahead," he encouraged.

A quick flip of two new cards marked the positions of a Welsh Corgi and an English Springer Spaniel.

"Okay, lets try again," Jamie declared as he flipped a match to the Pekingese, but was likewise unable to remember the correct location of the first card, resulting in an irritable daughter who was now four pairs ahead and obviously frustrated and uninterested in playing anymore as she swept her hand across the table knocking the rest away to the floor, effectively ending the game.

"Kaylin! Állj meg! That was not nice!" Eva reprimanded her granddaughter firmly. "You must apologize to your father!"

"NO! Him not play right!" the little girl talked back defiantly, showing a bit of the Reagan temper and that demand for absolute fairness she had obviously acquired in her time with the family.

"Sweetie, I'm sorry… Daddy was trying to play nice, but I'm just tired. Pick up your cards and we can start again later after I take a nap," Jamie offered in an effort to diffuse the situation.

"No! You not play nice and a'ways s'eeping!" Kaylin declared. "Me 'ave to be quiet! S'no fun anytime!" she added before turning to stomp up the stairs to go brood in her room.

"Kaylin Elizabeth Reagan!" Jamie called after her to no avail as he slumped back in his chair and crossed his arms over his head in frustration at being unable to go after her.

"Jamison, she is just three," Eva noted kindly as reminder to them both. "It is the time the temper shows if Edit was any sign. Do not be upset or blame yourself. I will bring her back down and have her clean up."

"No, let her go for a little while… she'll just shut down if we push her too hard," Jamie advised as he brought his hands down to rub his stubbly face and reminded himself to try to clean up at the sink later when he had more energy. "If there's one thing I know how to deal with in this family, it's temper," he sighed and admitted the God's honest truth with that statement. "I guess it's better that she expresses some of that than have her keep it inside and hide under the chair or cling in someone's lap. This is a lot for her to take in with so many changes… That's hard for her; it's my fault, not hers. Eddie and I will talk to her about it later."

"It is no one's fault but the man that struck you," Eva corrected. "But there is one more thing, and I know Edit would say it is not my place," she admitted as she walked over to one of the baskets on a shelf and pulled out the small, plush baby that had been included with Kaylin's big sister doll. "I found this in the refuse box this morning," she revealed as Jamie stared back through puzzled eyes. "When I asked her about it she said that all babies were bad and made mommies cry and hurt daddies so she did not want one. I let it go before I spoke with you."

"Oh, terrific," Jamie moaned as he held the side of his head while the hits from the obviously traumatized little girl kept coming. "I thought we were past that. I wonder what brought it up again?"

"I believe…" Eva paused and bit her lip, wondering if it was right to reveal the next set of information, but she decided to press ahead, anyway. "I believe from yesterday when I returned from my errand. You were asleep when Linda was upset and talking to Henry about their wish for another," she frowned. "I did not mean to overhear, but I spoke to Edit and she explained it was because of the shooting. From what was said I do not think it is possible at this time, and Kaylin must have heard as well and thought the baby was making her cry. This is what I think," she declared.

"And she's still sure our baby hurt me," Jamie concluded even as he processed that sad news for Danny and his sister-in-law who had been going out of her way to help him at this time. "It's just not fair… nothing is ever easy for this little girl, or for any of us is it?" he lamented with the blame for everything in this house still falling squarely over his own heart in spite of assurances from others that it did not belong there. "I'll add it to the list," he declared with his own dread at the conversation with his wife that was sure to follow. Little did he know she already had her own plans about how to deal with it.

###

"Ed, I'm not so sure about this," Jamie admitted dejectedly as he listened while his wife came down the steps with a fresh change of clothes for him, determined that tonight's anticipated trip to the turf club to watch Kaylin and the rest of the Blue Shieldz practice was going to move forward now in an attempt to inject just a touch of normalcy into their lives again, especially after Kaylin's reaction earlier in the day although they both agreed to tread lightly over the baby issue and just continue to reinforce it as a good thing until the little girl adjusted. "It's hardly worth all this effort."

"Are you kidding me? Since when? These kids have been begging to see Coach J for the past couple of weeks. C'mon, you can't stand them up tonight! It's their after-Christmas party and they have a whole bunch of get well stuff planned for you! And you are so worth the effort, lambchop," she insisted brightly but with a quick worried frown at his resigned tone as she made her way into the reclaimed dining room and over to the hospital bed that had taken up a required residence there until he was ready to attempt steps again. "Think of this as a dry run. We need to figure out how to do this stuff ourselves now that you're home. You can't stay in this bed for the next six months."

"I'm not ready…" he trailed off and looked away, biting back the words that said he wasn't their coach anymore, probably never would be again. In truth he missed his team of mini Messi's terribly, but given his own daughter's reaction to what had happened, the last thing he wanted to do was scare and disappoint another bunch of little kids. "It's just hard for me to sit up that long… my hip still really hurts, and you shouldn't be trying to do this yourself, Ed, it's not safe for you or the baby. You're not supposed to be doing any lifting."

"Which is why you're going to give in and take your pain meds before we go, and the only thing I'll be doing by myself is getting you ready and driving, okay? Mom will be back from dropping Kaylin off early and she'll help me get you out to the car so we can slide you in the back seat to make it easier. We're only going a few minutes up the road and you'll only be there for the last part of practice and a little after for the party to keep it short. Danny or one of the other dads can help us get you out and resituated in the wheelchair and inside once we're there. Please, Jamie. I know this went from being something we didn't even have to think about to a major three-ring circus production, but we've gotta start somewhere, right? You're gonna have to go back and forth to Columbia every week for real therapy soon and your daughter needs this… she's just scared after everything that's happened and she has to see her daddy is getting better," she teared up and blinked. "We all do. It's been weeks since you came back from Washington."

"Oh, Ed, please don't cry again," he begged as her expression tore through his heart and he conceded against his better judgement. She was right; now that he was home for a few days into this scheduled leave there were some unavoidable truths to be faced, including the fact that Eddie had not yet been allowed to view the full extent of the damage… no one from the family had, not even Linda as he had been fortunate to have Aaron help him change in the morning, and thus far he had managed to live in just one set of loose wear at a time. Somehow it was easier to depend on a near stranger for that, but now it was inescapable as his wife was determined to take him to this practice and things like this remained beyond him for now as there was no reaching and bending beyond that leg with those still-painful ribs. "I'll try, no promises though, okay?"

"All I can ask," Eddie agreed with a sniff as she optimistically laid out his clothes on the foot of the bed… loose sports tear-away pants that were easy to work around the brace while keeping it hidden somewhat from the kids and a dressier solution to his now everyday basketball shorts, a soft 'Property of NYPD' tee and hoodie plus his usual coach's ball cap… anything to keep the previous vision of him the same in front of Kaylin and the other kids, even with the cold winter weather outside. "Since it's just me, why don't we strip you down and do a hot towel sponge bath right here? That way if you're tired when we get back later you'll be all set for the night. I can just change the bedding before you go to sleep. Since Aaron can't come on Thursday, Renzulli is on the signup schedule for that morning to stop by and help get you shaved or if you're feeling up to it sitting on the bench in the shower to at least get your hair washed when Linda's here to change the dressings and give you your antibiotics while I'm at work."

"I hate that," he gritted when she returned from the newly refurbished bathroom across the hall with a pail of hot water and clean towels before closing the doors as the thought of his former TO having to help him do something so basic was humiliating, although maybe no more so than having his wife bathe and dress him in bed like he was an infant.

"I know," she conceded as she started to ease him out of the soft button-up shirt he was wearing while trying not to react outwardly to the continued sickening array of heavy dark bruising apparent over his entire left rib cage which had still not seemingly faded to any extent. "But I have to be at work and we need help since Linda's not supposed to lift anything with her back right now either, plus you'll feel better and it's all worth it to have you home with us, isn't it? You do such a good job now of transferring yourself off the bed and into and out of your chair one-handed with that trapeze contraption and some help, but we agreed it's not safe for you to try to do that on the wet tile, right? Even with all those bars and handholds Wilson installed. As soon as your side and ribs heal and you're more mobile with crutches all of this will get a lot easier," she promised while taking a deep breath for what was to come as she knew how reluctant he would be to continue. "Speaking of which, how about showing off those impressive muscles and lift yourself up a bit so I can slip the rest off," she encouraged as he shook his head and complied without another word after a painfully long pause with a tight grimace as he knew there was no way around it anymore, and she carefully removed his current set of shorts and boxers while taking in the sight of the rest of his now naked but for his right leg battered body which hardly looked any better elsewhere given the surgical sites evident over his right hip and left side, the chest port and what she knew to be the real horror on the whole of that leg still covered up in a heavy ankle-nearly-to-hip metal brace over the thick layers of gauze and brown bandages that Linda came to inspect and change in private every morning. Jamie lay back unmoving with his eyes locked on the ceiling, unwilling to look at his wife's face as she got her first nearly unfettered view of what he had become.

"Okay," she huffed with a sad, tight swallow as she tried to compose herself and bit her lip, fighting unsuccessfully to keep the tears at bay while trying to cover the shock and dipped a towel in the water before wringing it out and starting softly to pat and wash him down. "Um, well... I'll just do the best I can and you let me know if anything's too hot or uncomfortable, alright? I'm so sorry..."

"Stop it, Ed!" he pleaded as soon as he heard those words. "Please don't say that anymore… I can't stand hearing it! It breaks my heart and I can't... I can't deal with anything else that's broken right now," he admitted sadly.

"I'm not… I'm sor… I mean I promise I won't do that anymore. What I see is my handsome husband…" she attempted to assure in an even manner as she paused to wring out the towel again and continue. "Who needs my help right now... until he gets better," she tried to soothe, although the emotion had overcome her voice and that had come out in a rather strangled sob despite her intentions. "God, Jamie…"

"I can't do it…" he rasped as his arms came up to cross tightly over his forehead and he squeezed his eyes shut against the renewed pain in his heart and body. "Between you and Kaylin… the baby now too… nothing's right anymore, and it's because _I_ did something stupid. This wasn't your fault and I hate that you think that and have to… to see me this way. Please, just don't look… I can't… go away..."

"Hey, I'm not going anywhere!" Eddie rebuked at his pitiful demand, surprised at first and then insistent as that attempt to retreat from her once more sparked the determination in her voice again and her blue eyes flashed beyond the tears that had fallen. "We don't do that for each other, remember? Since when haven't I had your back? And the baby and Kaylin will be fine… I know this is a lot to take at once and maybe we can't wave a magic wand this time and make it all disappear, but we took vows not too long ago," she reminded as she recomposed herself and started dabbing gently again. "Jamison Reagan, you are my best friend and my greatest love," she began to recite the still familiar lines once more as her voice cracked while she continued. "You taught me that two people joined together with respect and trust and can be far stronger and happier than each could ever be alone. You are the strength I didn't know I needed, and the joy that I didn't know I lacked. None of that's changed…" she continued. "I chose to spend the rest of my life with you. I promised to love you for who you are, and for who you would become," she paused as she put the towel down to sit near him and draw the backs of two fingers lightly over his cheek to interrupt the now steady stream as Jamie finally let go of some of the emotion and fear he had been bottling up, even though he could still not meet her eyes. "I promised to be patient, and to remember that all things between us are rooted in love. I promised to share my whole heart with you, and to remember to show you how deeply I care for you, no matter the challenges that may come our way… like this," she added as her chin trembled and she gave up on the bath, instead now just running her fingers gently over his bare skin, tracing the newly bruised area around his IV port at first before slipping down to follow the contours of the healing incision lines over his side and the still-bandaged area over his hip where the bone had been mined that she prayed would make his leg whole again.

"I promised to love you loyally and fiercely… as long as I shall live."

"Ed," he rasped as her soft hand eventually went lower. "I can't even…"

"Jamie, I know," she leaned in gently and brushed his lips. "I won't, I promise. Look at me," she begged as his panicking eyes finally relented and met hers. "This isn't about that. I just want you to be able to relax with me. You need to know that I'm not afraid to touch you and see what's happened and I'm not going to hurt you… ever. I swear… everyone else around you lately has been doing enough of that… causing you more pain with all the poking and prodding. Nothing can ever change the way I feel about you. My wonderful husband… the one I love loyally and fiercely is here," she added as she moved up and softly kissed his forehead. "And here," she added with a repeated action on his chest before laying her head over his heart to listen as he relaxed and breathed in the scent of that intoxicating French vanilla. "These two places are still strong… that's all that will ever matter to Kaylin, the munchkin and me… as long as you're with us the rest will heal in time and get fixed or we'll figure out how to move on all together, okay?" she questioned as she let go of a little of her own guilt before lifting her head and continuing in a playful tone to help break the weight of the current heavy mood. "Besides, I'm facing my own challenge today," she offered with a sniff and her patented frowny face, but with a renewed sparkle in her eyes now that she had the sense that they had finally reconnected a little and moved past another major hurdle together.

"And what is that, lambchop?" he huffed after pulling her in for another relieved and much needed lingering kiss on the lips after that emotional release.

"Your little lemon in here is messed up on dates like you were and demanding pickle juice of all things and there's no more left in the jar I had in the fridge," she lamented with a smile. "I can't send my broken husband out to run to the store for some and my mother has the car and thinks I'm crazy for asking her to do that, so now I have to suck it up all night. How is that fair?" she smirked.

"Pickle juice and not the actual pickles themselves… figures," he sighed with a small still-defeated laugh before continuing sadly. "I love you, Edit Katalin. You know I would do anything I had to for you and the kids, it's just this… I'm trying, but it's so damn hard. Whenever something happened to me before… I felt like I could bounce back and be me again eventually, you know, right? But this time… this time that's not happening. I can't see my way out of it and I can't help myself right now… it scares me and it's scaring Kaylin and you… and that hurts me more than anything else, you know… here?" he added through a few renewed tears as he took her hand and put it over his heart once more.

"I know, baby, but that's why we're helping… your family and friends. That's why I wanted you home, so we could do this for you and not some strangers. Jamie, you would be the first to help any one of us that was in trouble, now the hardest thing for you is to accept is that you need our help… _we_ need their help to get through this… and we are gonna do that. It's just going to take time and be a bit of a crazy circus of people in and out while we're juggling our lives until then, okay? I promise this will get better though," she assured as she reached down to give him another kiss and wipe his face dry. "Now, we better get a move on it and get you dressed again before we have to leave, or my mom will be back in a minute and somehow I don't think you want her helping out with this part, do you?"

 _You will fail. You will likely fail often. It will be painful. It will be discouraging. At times it will test you to your very core._

* * *

 _Next, the trip to soccer practice goes a little out of sorts, and what Eddie desperately hoped would cheer Jamie up only serves to make him feel worse and sets him up for a big downturn with an unlikely source of support that will take him away from the family for a while as his own daughter's insecurities continue to show and he tries to overcompensate._


	69. Chapter 69

Chapter 69

"See, we made it, and it wasn't even that hard," Eddie tried to assure and downplay the fact that she needed to take a few deep breaths of her own to calm herself some forty-five minutes later when Jamie was finally wheeled safely into the newly built, sprawling indoor turf facility with Eva following close behind carrying a few additional bags from the grocery and her daughter's carefully packed supplies.

"Ed, you weren't supposed to do all that," Jamie admonished as he tried to settle himself into a more comfortable position and nervously looked around while she fussed at unzipping that new primaloft jacket and made sure he was situated with a blanket on his lap. "You were told no lifting… pretty sure lugging a forty pound wheelchair in and out of the car by yourself, dragging your husband across the back seat a few times and pushing him up a ramp to get in here qualifies."

"I'm fine… Mom helped, I didn't really do that alone, and you're not that heavy. We were running late, and it's not like I was gonna stand back and let you fall when you got out. Get over it, Reagan," she warned clearly to put an end to that discussion. "Now, I have to go find Stacey and see if she needs any last minute help. Do you want to stay down here on the field behind the netting to watch or go upstairs to the viewing lounge right away?" she asked. "Practice time is almost over and that's where they're setting up for the party."

"I'll stay here," Jamie murmured as his attention was instantly drawn to a little group on the other side of the closest field, giggling and playing their favorite skill game of Sharks and Minnows amid the cones with Danny, Sean and Jack standing in the middle as the sharks and trying to steal the balls away from the kids as they crossed the field with Kaylin and her teammates Colin Kittner, Matthew Miller, Amanda Berman, Jack Seyfried, Palmer Peters and their newest member Mickey Dawson making up the rest of the enthusiastic pack. His eyes misted up as Danny yelled "GO!" and he watched his daughter sprint forward laughing and dodging her cousins as she made it safely to the other side… the first time since his accident he could remember her looking that happy, and it nearly tore his heart out while adding more than a small jealous twinge to know he wasn't part of it and had to sit on the sidelines watching while his brother took over that favorite role.

"Hey, Reagan," a familiar voice diverted his attention away, and he looked up to see Steve Kittner, Colin's father and a third-grade detective at the 3-5, walking over. "Good to see you out, man. The whole house has been worried about you since we heard about your accident, and we're all wondering when you'll be back," he added with concern at Jamie's appearance before reaching out to offer a handshake.

"Wait!" Eddie interrupted as she stepped purposefully in between to intercept the gesture. "Sorry, Steve… we have to be really, really careful. Jamie's had some surgery, and he's gotta stay away from germs. I've got some hand sanitizer somewhere in these bags…" she trailed off and turned around. "Now, where did Mom go with them?" she puzzled before looking up to the glass window of the viewing lounge and spotting Eva already upstairs helping to set up the snacks at the table.

"It's okay," Jamie sighed with a roll of his eyes as he put his hand up to wave his colleague back to placate his wife. "I appreciate it, Steve, thanks. I'm… I'm not really sure when that will be, but I'm working on it," he lied basically to spare his wife's feelings at the moment. "It's gonna be awhile though," he admitted.

"I can imagine," the other man added in sympathy as he eyed Jamie's leg which was still locked in a basically straight position. "Hell of a thing… hope your brother finds the bastard that did that to you. Well, I'll let you go, but tell us if you need anything," Steve insisted with a nod over to the team as Danny's whistle blew and signaled that practice was ending, sending all the kids to fan out and collect the cones and stray balls. "I mean that, and we all wanted to thank you guys for keeping up with the team through all this… I know it can't be easy, but it's Colin's favorite thing every week to come out here and play with the other kids, so I owe you man, otherwise he'd be pouting and kicking a ball around in my house. Pretty sure my insurance wouldn't cover that."

"Yeah, it's mine too," Jamie conceded and forced a smile before the cheer of "BLUE SHIELDZ!" echoed across the space when the team put their hands together and heralded an incoming invasion of three- and four-year-olds as Danny leaned down and pointed out his presence to them… all but one as Kaylin turned away and proceeded to drop her head and kick at the ball bag before her uncle could be seen kneeling down to talk to her.

"Oh, geeze, he really shouldn't have done that!" Eddie gasped as she was distracted by the six energetic little people who were now running and skipping across the field chattering happily with cries of "Coach J! Coach J!"

"STOP! FREEZE! TIME OUT!" she stepped forward in her best practiced traffic control stance and unsuccessfully tried to herd them off, but they were in full out flock mode and split around her like a gaggle of geese on a mission so that before she knew it they were all gathered back together and crowded around Jamie's chair on either side although Steve had managed to step in to make sure that at least his vulnerable leg was protected.

"Hey, guys… looking good out there!" Jamie greeted them enthusiastically with his usual high fives and that trademark smile that Eddie had been yearning to see, but at the moment she was too distracted by the fact that he was being mauled by a half dozen excited little pre-schoolers talking all at once to notice.

"Coach J! We miss you!" Palmer announced.

"Mickey and me made a well card! Come see!" Amanda cried and tugged on his arm.

"Hey, I colored it too!" little Jack Seyfried insisted.

"You play with us again now?" Matthew begged. "Please?"

"Why you have owies?" Colin wondered as he inspected the chair. "Do them hurt?"

"No, no, no, guys, wait!" Eddie tried again while her husband was surrounded as usual by his beloved team which was the original intent of this evening except that right now she was nearly having heart failure over that fact since she suddenly viewed them as little, sweaty, grubby-handed, sniffly, germ-laden soccer ball kicking threats to his health instead. "We have to go upstairs first and wash up and use the sanitizer before we can get close to Coach J, okay? And we have to be very, very careful not to bump into him because he's still getting better. So everybody take one giant step backwards and follow Mr. Kittner, please. He'll take you upstairs to the party. Make sure everything is ready and we'll be up in a minute so you can surprise Coach again with your presents and the cake, okay?"

"'Kay!" was the enthusiastic unified concession and Steve left with a happy little jabbering group in tow.

"Jamie, don't you dare breathe!" she ordered her husband as soon as the others exited the area. "What's wrong with you?" she scolded. "I told you not to encourage them to touch! I think I have some spare antibacterial wipes here in my purse somewhere," she fretted and began clawing her way through it.

"Ed, honey, relax… I think we've got a bigger problem, anyway," Jamie noted sadly as his daughter could still be seen balking near the bench across the field. "She won't even come over here now."

"What?" she paused on her mission and looked up. "Oh, baby girl," she sighed at the sight. "I thought we got through to her yesterday."

"Evidently not," he concluded. "I don't know what to do anymore to make it better, Ed… I think she's just so afraid of losing someone again that every time she looks at me and sees that I can't do the stuff like I did before it scares her… she can't even sit on my lap. It's not right. No one should go through this, especially not a little kid. What are we gonna do?"

"Jamie, I think this might be above our pay grade," she admitted reluctantly after a work-time heart-to-heart with her girlfriend over their daughter's behavior had her considering another approach. "I was talking with Kara. You know they saw someone when they were at their wits end because Brandon was having all those temper tantrums. Maybe we need help… or advice at least from someone who knows what they're doing."

"A shrink? You think she needs a shrink, Eddie?" Jamie hissed nervously and became instantly defensive at the thought of someone insinuating that about his daughter. "Our family isn't enough to help her?"

"No… well, honestly I don't know, but I think you're right that a lot of this is because of what happened before and it's brought all those feelings back. She's grieving… maybe even for Jayne, or maybe it is all about her fear of losing you, but little kids do that different from us and she's so sensitive and afraid to be alone. It started as soon as you got hurt," Eddie added. "With you gone for so long and all the stress she's seen me go through, she's clinging to Danny as a way to insulate herself from that… just like she does with Bear because she thinks he keeps her safe at night."

"So what do we do now that I screwed her up again?" Jamie asked forlornly, feeling as if he had failed his family once more as he glanced over and saw that his older brother had finally convinced Kaylin to let him pick her up and was starting to walk over with Jack and Sean trailing behind lugging the equipment bags.

"Hey, Jamie… you didn't… that's not what I meant, now please don't get down," Eddie begged while she kneeled next to the chair and feared what was supposed to be an encouraging evening was going up in smoke. "This is on both of us as parents, right? I know how much it upsets you, but it will get better soon so try to be happy for the kids tonight, okay? We'll ask around. There has to be some kind of support play group or a counselor or someone else who specializes in this, right? We can ask Dr. Meherin to recommend someone or see if Linda knows anyone from the hospital… maybe they'll even tell us that what she's doing is completely normal and we just have to ride through it so we don't worry so much. We'll talk about it more later, okay?"

"Yeah," he agreed as he struggled to push those feelings down and force on a happier mask for his daughter before she could see his disappointment. "Hey, sweetness," he greeted her when Danny was near. "You sure were speedy tonight!" he encouraged. "C'mere, baby, and give me a hug."

"Last little minnow to go down," his brother declared with pride as he shifted her facing forward while she was still clinging to his neck and set her down after instantly reading his brother's mood. "Go ahead, cutie… give your Daddy a hug and a kiss. It's okay," he whispered to her. "She got those Reagan moves from me you know… fake to the right, juke to the left, gets them every time. Took three of us to gang up and finally catch her."

"Because me too fast," Kaylin finally relented and approached Jamie.

"You sure are; I'm so happy I got to watch tonight," he murmured and pulled her in close for a hug and kiss much to Eddie's vexation although she knew better than to step in the middle to break it up.

"She's super fast," Jack agreed as he awkwardly looked for something to say while trying to hide his reaction to the obvious trauma. "Hey, Uncle Jamie… I'm really sorry you got hurt."

"Me too," Sean piped in shyly. "Hope you feel better soon."

"I will guys, don't worry about that, and thanks for helping out here with your dad," Jamie answered in an effort to assure them. "It means a lot to us. Why don't you head upstairs with your Aunt Eddie and Kaylin and grab some food before it's gone?"

"Jamie, but wait… the party's for you. Do you need me to…" Eddie cut in with a worried glance at her husband, concerned that he required some kind of personal assistance.

"No… I know, I just want to talk to Danny for a sec. There's another ramp, and it's kinda steep, Ed. You've done enough tonight," he reminded her about the access to the half-level raised observation room that was situated between the fields. "Just go and take the kids, it's better if he helps me up there in a bit, okay?"

"Well, don't be long. They only gave us the space for another half hour or so," she reminded.

"We won't. Go ahead, sweetie," he encouraged Kaylin with another squeeze. "Go with Mommy. Uncle Danny and I will be up there in just a minute," Jamie assured as he watched and waited for his wife and the rest of the family to clear the area before his forged expression fell.

"What's up, kid?" Danny asked apprehensively as he could sense that his younger brother was really struggling with the bumpy stretch he'd run into with his daughter at home so far. "Look, the boys and I can clear out of here so we don't distract her unless you need help getting home. Go enjoy the party with your team and don't worry about that… I think she was just afraid to see how the other kids were going to react."

"Yeah, they didn't seem to mind so much," Jamie observed the two very different sets of reactions sadly. "And that's not why she didn't want to come over here… you know it," he added before pausing. "She needs you, Dan…" he finally continued. "Promise me no matter what happens you won't stay away because you think I can't deal with that, because I'm glad," he swallowed hard to mask the growing lump in his throat. "I'm really glad she has you to turn to while I'm so messed up here," he admitted as he pointed to his head and his leg. "She deserves more and I'm not sure if I'll ever get over any of it the way things are going."

"Aw, kid," Danny sighed with guilt over the fact that his younger brother was still in the dark over much of what had happened, and it was obviously weighing heavily on him, but he did not dare go against his father's direct order and reveal any of that right now. "Don't talk that way. That little girl loves you more than anything; you just gotta cut yourself some slack and give it a chance. You've only been home a couple of days. All of this is going to work out and get better soon. I promise."

"Yeah, that's what Eddie thinks too," Jamie admitted before he glanced up at his sibling directly. "Look, I know I don't always say it, and you and I have gotten into it in the past over stupid stuff, but now that I have the chance... I just wanted to tell you that you're a really good brother, Danny, and thank you and Linda for putting aside everything… you know what's going on to help us. Eva heard her talking to Pop yesterday," he explained. "M'm sorry. Everyone's been so focused on me and my problems… I just didn't want you or her to think yours didn't matter, and I feel bad I got upset with you the other day about Eddie."

"Well, I shoulda never left her either, but…" Danny paused and stopped himself from revealing the true extent of what had happened that day at the doctor's office once more. "So don't mention it, kid… we're family, even when we screw up a little, right? I'll always have your back," he assured as he felt his own guilt for the weight of the secrets he was still keeping, but this still wasn't the time to share them. "All of us will," he emphasized and worried for a second over what his father might uncover about the intentions of a former partner. "That's what Reagans do. You wanna know what else we do?"

"What?"

"We like to eat. Now let's get you upstairs before those little turf rats of yours hoover everything up and we miss out on that. I think we both deserve it tonight."

###

"Erin, won't you come in," Eva offered cordially although with more than a slight hint of chill in her voice when she answered the door the following afternoon. Even though Eddie had made her mother promise on her life not to reveal to Jamie the extent of the current strife between her and his sister that didn't mean the older Janko woman felt the need to go out of her way to make her feel welcome in this house after learning what had been said to her daughter. "Jamison is just freshening up in the bathroom I believe. He'll be out shortly."

"He'll be out… by himself?" Erin stuttered for half a second as she warily eyed his mother-in-law.

"Yes, of course… he wishes to do as he is capable now. Kaylin is visiting with Henry," Eva informed, although her guest already knew that, having come directly from her father's house where she had stopped to gather some courage and advice from her grandfather before calling here first as was now apparently required.

"Hey, sis," came his greeting a few minutes later as he slowly, but determinedly wheeled himself into the living room on his own… a feat that was becoming easier the past few days as the pain in his side from the broken ribs began to diminish and he was better able to use his left arm more effectively so not to wind up spinning in a frustrating slow circle or bumping into a wall. "I pulled the sheets off the bed and put them in the hamper after Linda was done," he informed with a look towards Eva. "If you could please get a clean set down from the closet in the laundry room, I'll make it later before Ed gets home. I want to surprise her."

"Of course," the older woman agreed as the two had engaged in a lengthy conversation between therapy visits after his wife left that morning when he had asked for Eva's help since watching Eddie struggle with the logistics of moving him to and from the turf facility in addition to accepting his daughter's dependence on Danny had been eye-opening and weighed heavily on his heart the evening before. Now he was more determined than ever to make every effort possible to lighten their load, starting from the bottom just as Riggs had told him… he needed to feel accomplished… to be encouraged that tomorrow would be better, and if that started with something as mundane as making his own bed to reinforce the fact that little things in life matter, than so be it.

Unfortunately no one had taken the time to explain that philosophy and the importance of one task turning into another to his sister.

"Jamie, what are you talking about? That's crazy," Erin frowned. "You're supposed to be resting, not worrying about housework! I'll make it for you myself if no one else will."

"I believe that it is important to him," Eva observed and took instant offense to the insinuation that she was not caring properly for her son-in-law. "You should not interfere," she added bluntly before moving on as Erin's mouth dropped open and she remained speechless. "Jamison, I have a few things to research online in this area. I need to open an account at a local bank before the closing on my property in Rochester. Do you mind if I take your laptop upstairs? That way you can visit with your sister in private," she offered.

"Sure… uh, but NYBT has a branch right down the street that we use here and they cover most of the boroughs," he advised, puzzled initially by Eva's sudden return to her former more biting, sour self before his brain started equating that with the fact Eddie had pointedly avoided any mention of his sister lately if not her outright physical presence. In fact, he could not remember the last time he had seen the two in the same room together when he was awake. "I'm sure there's one in Park Slope… Erin?" he tested.

"Yes, um… there's several actually," she managed to stammer while confirming his suspicion. Erin Reagan was hardly ever at a loss for words unless there was a good reason behind it. "I've… I've had an account there for years."

"Very good to know, thank you. I will look at that as a possibility," Eva nodded only at her son-in-law and took leave up to her room.

"Jamie, what's going on?" Erin demanded as soon as they were alone.

"Gee, 'Rin... I guess I should ask you the same thing," he frowned before pausing to transfer himself successfully into the recliner while she quickly got up to hover at his side.

"All I want to know is if you're doing okay, is that so wrong?" she pressed before sitting down on the couch once more. "I was over talking to Pop, and Kaylin was telling me about last night. You really went out to her practice in the cold? Seriously? Who's brilliant idea was that?" she asked with intent and he immediately bristled with that uncloaked insinuation that Eddie had done something wrong even though he himself had doubted it at first. So that was the obvious root of what was going on between them… a not-so-unexpected clash of ideas between his mother-hen pecking sister and his wife who had apparently sought to hide that fact from him… which could only mean there was more to it and he would likely be upset by the truth as she was not one to hold her tongue on such matters otherwise. "You look really tired. Don't you think you're pushing yourself too hard?"

"I'm fine," he insisted. "I've gotta start somewhere, Erin. I can't stay in that bed for the next six months," he added using Eddie's mantra from the night before. "Besides, what are you doing out?" he countered, not interested now in supporting her attitude and quite frankly not willing to listen to someone else tell him what to do just when he felt he had made a step… or rather a roll... literally... in the right direction. "Thought you were getting sick. Don't you think you should be home in your bed?" he asked sarcastically.

"You thought… I'm not, I'm fine too," she rebuffed and tried to cover that excuse that had been used to explain her recent absence although it was clear now that her brother had an inkling of what was going on in the family dynamics even if no one had come out and spelled it out for him… especially that part regarding the unfortunate hurt feelings over the power of attorney debacle.

"Good."

"I was just trying to be careful around you."

"Why, because you're afraid I'm gonna crack some more? Newsflash, I think I covered that."

"Jamie, I don't want to do this," she declared with a frustrated sigh as it was apparent from his tone that their conversation had degraded into one of those irritating, typical back and forth contentious, bantering sibling arguments she was more accustomed to holding with Danny.

"Then let's not, okay?"

"I'm just worried about you… that's my job, right? To keep you from getting hurt? It always has been, ever since before you were born. I saw what it did to Mom."

"Not anymore… it can't be. Not if that means you're gonna question everything Ed and I decide to do. You're my sister and I love you. I really need your help to get through this, Erin, but it's gotta be the right kind. Whatever it is between you and her now, you need make it better, please?" he begged. "Even Danny's stepping up when he's got other stuff to deal with too. With the baby and everything else we can't handle one more thing that's wrong in our family now."

"Jamie, I…" Erin started sharply, fully intending to go into a tirade about how she viewed Eddie's recent behavior and decisions as being detrimental to his recovery, or how he needed to force his wife to accept the reality that his days on patrol in the NYPD were over and that they both needed to look ahead towards something else, but the utterly broken look of a little boy reflecting back at her told her he had already come to that conclusion on his own and quelled her response. Jamison Reagan had indeed reached the limit of what he could bear for now and even her angry heart had to admit that. "I love you Jamie, and I'll try… I mean I promise to make it right with her," she assured with outward conviction before reaching over for a hug and pulling his head into her shoulder, but that did not stop her from mouthing one last comment under her breath so that he did not hear.

"I just pray to God that I don't have to say I told you so."

* * *

 _Oh, but she will… and the tuna will hit the ceiling fan very soon again, but first we'll catch up with Frank and Henry as they discuss the various goings on in the Reagan family and the ensuing investigation over some breakfast the next morning before setting off in opposite directions, determined to pull some strings in their dark-arts Commissioner sort of ways while one OC makes a fateful escape and Eddie and Danny discover some interesting news about another fringe character that may come into play further down the line._

 _FYI: I'll try to keep to the current schedule, but updates might be intermittent over the next few weeks. Some family stuff and travel plans will have me out of pocket for a bit. Hope everyone is enjoying their summer._


	70. Chapter 70

_Apologies for going AWOL on this story for a bit there, but it's been a real up and down few weeks juggling some exciting college-hunting trips with my daughter with a close family member's very serious illness so writing and everything else took a definite backseat there and will continue to for a while. On that note, I'll be paring back to one update a week until I have time to bank a few more prewritten chapters and connect the dots with some "werks" already finished ahead including a twenty-plus chapter story detailing the lives of our favorite greyhairs, Henry and Betty Reagan, as well as Frank and Mary's early years together called "Where the Heart Lies."_

* * *

Chapter 70

"So what's bothering you, Pop?" Frank asked after arriving downstairs early that Thursday morning, having suffered through a restless night himself only to find his father had already worked his way through half a pot of fresh coffee and was ready to go back for more. Both men had heavy thoughts on their minds and the discussion over Danny's findings with the glass evidence and video footage had only added to those the past few days since they were both brought up to speed with the state of his investigation. "I know I got home late, but all I heard were the floorboards creaking half the night, and it sure wasn't the cat so don't try to blame it on him this time."

"Regrets," Henry answered honestly as he stared ahead and stirred his near-empty cup on autopilot. "That's what's bothering me."

"Those," Frank acknowledged with a nod as he poured his own hot brew and then brought the pot over to fill his father's mug in an effort to mute that annoying clattering of the bare spoon on the side of the stoneware. "I have plenty of them as well," he admitted.

"Not like mine," Henry confessed with great guilt as he laid the utensil down on the placemat. "What's come to pass… it started with my own hand, Francis… I did this."

"You're talking about the Templar," his son reasoned after a pause with the knowledge that Henry himself had been one of the founding members of the fraternal organization. "That's a dead-end street, Pop. It was a different thing back then… you helped form it for a reason, to clean up the department. What it became after the job was done… that's not on you. This though… what happened to Joe and now to Jamie… this was done on _my_ watch," Frank sighed with perceived equal or greater sin as he took a deep breath in through his nose. "I missed it back then," he admitted. "Now somehow I've missed it again, and all my boys have suffered because of that… all of them," he trailed off at that thought. "Joe is lost, Danny won't rest now until this is finished, and Jamie..." he trailed off with a heavy sigh before admitting out loud. "He'll never be the same no matter what. You said it yourself."

"Maybe I was wrong about that too," Henry gruffed as he glanced over and clearly read the stress and guilt that had descended over his son as Frank considered his own personal failings in this whole mess. "I was on the same page as Erin… I thought he came home too soon, but when she came over to get Kaylin yesterday, Eva told me the boy talked to her and that he's starting to pick his head up," he tried to hearten. "He managed to do almost everything for himself in the afternoon… what he's capable of to this point, anyway. Even made an effort to make up his bed although she said he was so exhausted by that point he fell asleep on top of it right after. He doesn't want Eddie to have to fuss over him though, especially with her being pregnant. He's starting to fight, Francis, and I wouldn't bet against him anymore."

"That's good to hear, Pop, but there are things he will likely not be able to overcome no matter how hard he tries," Frank reasoned and admitted one of those heavy regrets. "I should have done more… given him a clearer path forward. You were right about that too."

"There are more things going on inside this family that are leaving scars just as deep," Henry reminded sadly as he considered their current state. "What with Linda and Danny now… my poor sweetie-pie Kaylin, Eddie and this baby that will come. I'm worried about both of my granddaughters… really all three," he corrected. "Erin too. She's pushing away when we ought to be coming together, Francis," he added and caught his son staring out across the room blankly just as he himself had been doing before, no doubt still concentrating on this Templar mess and no more ready than any of the others to engage in the rest of what needed to be done at home just yet. Still, Henry continued to press for just a bit to test the waters and was disappointed to see they remained flat. "We need to start putting things back the way they were. If Jamie can make the effort… I mean even Eva is looking after the kids," he admitted while neglecting to include the other subject matter the older Janko woman had disclosed about her daughter's continued work troubles at the precinct. "I feel like we need to do more for them."

"We will, Pop… later," Frank assured. "And maybe it's not the same as they were before, but Eddie and Linda seem to be making some inroads… Danny is doing his part with his brother and Kaylin… the boys are helping. Erin will come around once Jamie is better. We're not that far apart," he insisted somewhat blindly. "First, I need to find the son of a bitch that caused all this before he does more harm," he added as his focus settled back in protective mode.

"As you say, Francis," Henry conceded outwardly while deciding to keep mum for now on some of his own plans which were concentrated on his granddaughters' needs and figuring out a way to see to their individual situations with the ultimate goal of reconnecting the three of them. That would start today with a covert visit to the 12th to sort out this Dexter business for Eddie so that he could lessen her stress at work. "Did you come up with anything on Curatola yet?"

"Chuck Miller is calling her and her lawyer in today for depositions on the lawsuit. He's already got an investigator on her, but he hasn't pulled anything notable. Figured maybe I'd swing by Legal for a few minutes… you know, stop in and say hello… see what kind of reaction I get."

"You mean sit down across the table and give your best Godfather stare to sweat her. Do you really think she's part of this?" Henry asked while shaking his head. "I wouldn't figure her for it."

"Neither do I, but if you think I'm going to let any stone go unturned after what happened the last time," Frank huffed back. "It's someone that's been close enough to us, Pop… it has to be. She found out about Jamie being at Columbia just before that whole mess came out in the press too. Now, what are your plans today?" he asked in a deliberate act of deflection and finally took a sip of his cooling coffee. "Is Kaylin coming over again to see Bear?"

"Not until later," Henry revealed. "Eva's keeping her for the morning. Thought I'd go out for a bit… maybe pick up a pastrami on rye at Barnett's and take it to Eddie for lunch. I've gotta hankering for some of their crunchy sauerkraut with that red cabbage and green apple slaw on the side… might even give that Uber thing a try."

"A side trip uptown to hand deliver a sandwich, huh?" Frank questioned as despite all outward appearances, he was not so distracted as to miss that rather obvious ploy. "Or a chance to face off with a certain desk sergeant and maybe give him the evil eye yourself?" he asked, honestly disappointed that Eddie had not taken his offer for a transfer to 1PP where she would have been well looked after and away from the drama at her home precinct. "Chain of command," he reminded with a frown and the familiar mantra. "That doesn't include interference by retired Commissioners."

"Humph… that never even occurred to me, Francis," Henry covered with a bald-faced lie that was not designed to fool anyone, although in truth it was not this Dexter he really intended to speak to. "If I can help it, I won't even say a word to the worthless piece of…"

"Pop!" Frank admonished as he got to his feet, suddenly restless and eager to get on with the day… his movement catching the attention of their four-legged guest who watched with interest from his lair in the sunroom as the two men went about the rest of the morning routine before Frank departed for 1PP with his detail and Henry continued to putter around in the kitchen biding his time before heading north on his ascribed mission. Unfortunately he was distracted and flustered when forced to come back inside after his Uber car arrived and he realized he had forgotten his wallet on the counter… so much so that he did not notice when a big, fluffy, much-loved cat made a calculated dart through the open door on a sortie of his own… determined to return to his preferred home a few blocks away and his favorite little girl waiting there.

###

"Twelfth Precinct, Officer Reagan speaking. How may I help you?" Eddie replied in her best professional sweet-sounding but in all honesty fake-interested voice for what seemed like the six-hundredth time that tour as she once again found herself chained to a desk on the main floor of the house answering the phone and filing mundane paperwork as Sergeant Dexter had insisted her services were absolutely required downstairs for this shift. The only saving grace for the day so far were the intermittent visits from Kara, Wilson and a few other of her on-duty friends as they rotated in and out bringing in suspects to process for Central Booking. "I guess this is our life now for the next however many months, munchie," she muttered to herself and her little lemon while transferring the call to the appropriate desk and flipping another form into her completed file as her uncooperative boss offered a self-satisfied smirk from his perch behind the main counter. The stress of the last week trying to juggle things with Jamie at home over the holidays was apparent though, and she sadly twirled her now slightly snug beloved engagement and wedding rings around her finger. It was almost exactly a year from the day he had proposed to her on New Year's Eve, getting down on one knee under the fireworks on the beach behind Spencer's house in a perfectly romantic moment she would remember forever, especially since Kaylin's adoption had been finalized in a rather dramatic fashion just days before and he had spent the previous few weeks recovering from that building collapse at Bridgewater.

Now their lives were messed up once again by another twist of fate, and there would be no fun trips to visit friends in California, at least for the near future since Jamie had lost the ability to do things like that as well as the mischievous light in his eyes she loved. On top of that today she noticed even her rings were getting tighter, a harbinger of things to come as the number on the scale began to creep up while the sprout, well… sprouted. Now it was already time to shop for some maternity uniform pants as her belly had unmistakably started to pooch. A sad sigh escaped her lips, and she feigned another search of the top desk drawer to steal a furtive glance at the screen of the silenced phone laying in there which remained blank. No news was supposed to be good news, right? Apparently all was well back at the house where she had reluctantly left Eva in charge of the situation once more, particularly after the fiasco the other day with the olive laden yogurt sauce used to nearly put Jamie down permanently on top of everything else. While her mother had reported that he had made true progress the day before, all Eddie found upon her return home after work was an exhausted husband who spent much of the evening sleeping in that very bed he had made, and the dark circles evident under his eyes this morning before she left were even more worrisome.

"So, I guess this is one of the fringe benefits of sitting at the Commissioner's dinner table every Sunday," a snarky, but familiar voice piped in from the other side of the desk with interest and caught her attention here in the present. "You get all the cushy assignments while the rest of us hoof it around the icy streets all day chasin' perps when it's ten degrees out?"

"Excuse me?" Eddie bristled with instant contempt and offered a death stare at the gall of the young officer in return.

"You can have those perks too, Beale," Dexter informed him from his seat behind the main desk as he joined the conversation without an invitation. "All you gotta do is get yourself knocked up by NYPD royalty like she did," he snorted as signed off on a report and stood up.

"But those are the department rules for everyone, right?" Marcus questioned as he seemed either ignorant or intent on ignoring the no go zone that Eddie's look clearly indicated. "You have to take modified assignment while you're pregnant?"

"Of course they do, makes them too delicate to go out there and do the real work," Dexter continued. "Got a meeting with Lieutenant Billings," he smirked. "Hold down the fort, be back in an hour. Try not to break a nail or screw anything else while I'm gone, Reagan."

"Suppose you're in the Academy? And what about the dads?" Marcus continued to prod along the same path as he somewhat nervously chewed the inside of his lip. "Do they get time off too if they're on the job? What if they're not married?"

"Meeting my ass," Eddie ignored him and muttered with disdain under her breath after her contentious sergeant departed, no doubt for an extended lunch with his well-connected buddy. "You can get lost too, Marcus. Try not to fall on yours when you're out there chasing those perps," she added irritably having no patience to deal with inane questions from the annoying and immature Marcus Beale who had been planted in this precinct the previous year by none other than one doting pseudo uncle Daniel Reagan who just happened to walk in the door at that very moment as if on cue.

"Hey, if it isn't my two favorite members of the good old 12th," Danny proclaimed as he greeted them with a wide smile that soon faded to a frown as he noticed his sister-in-law's mood and what he could only interpret as a guilty, ashamed look from Marcus… sort of like a little kid with his hand caught in the cookie jar. "What's the matter? Did I walk in on something here?" he griped.

"Nope, not a thing," Eddie answered curtly as she shifted another big pile of paperwork over on her desk. "Just interviewing another prime candidate for the CP club of the NYPD… you know the chauvinist pigs who think that women cops who get pregnant or have kids are somehow looking to sit around the precinct with our feet up eating bonbons every day while the menfolk do the real work."

"You said _that?"_ Danny huffed as he walked closer and smacked the younger man upside the head. "Are you nuts up there? Haven't you learned anything from me?"

"No, Uncle Danny! I mean I've learned lots from you!" Marcus insisted as his face flushed. "I was just asking because," he paused with a hard swallow. "What… what are you doing here?" he finally stammered out.

"Well, it looks like I'm just in time to save your pig-headed ass. You know I've had a female partner for the past seven years, and off the top of my head I could name five women cops in this house alone that could outrun, outsmart and outshoot you any day of the week including my sister-in-law here... and you're gonna stand there and insult her like that in front of a boss? You wanna find yourself in a ditch alone the next time you call a 10-85? What am I gonna do with you?"

"Insult… I didn't… at least I didn't mean to!" Marcus defended himself honestly for once. "Maybe it came off that way… I'm really sorry, Eddie! I was just trying to joke a little because you looked kinda down, and I _was_ really interested in what the policy was. I didn't know Sergeant Dexter was gonna jump in on you like that!"

"Yeah, right… I've been pregnant for how many months and now suddenly you're so interested? From now on that's Officer Reagan to you," Eddie continued to take offense as a few weeks working in the same office with Dexter had thinned her skin considerably and given Jamie's relationship with Marcus she hardly felt compelled to give him the benefit of the doubt.

"You, that's enough," Danny countered and gave Marcus a shove towards the doorway. "Take a hike. Grab a seat in the break room and I'll deal with you in a minute," he ordered before turning back to Eddie who was pulling over another file to work on and just shaking her head with her lips tightly pressed together. "Hey, go easy on the kid," he advised her. "He didn't mean anything by it… he's just… well he's a lot like me," he admitted with a little smirk. "Maybe I've been a bad example to him all these years. Sometimes we just run our mouths. I know that you would rather be out on patrol than sitting in here, and so does he and every other decent cop in this building."

"Don't apologize for him, Danny," Eddie countered as she flipped another page. "He's a grown man… maybe he should act like it."

"You're right," he softened before changing the subject. "Hey, how's the kid doing today?"

"He's… he's trying to do more than he should and tiring himself out ever since I took him to practice the other night," she answered honestly given the state she had left Jamie in that morning. "But I guess that's better than sitting around and feeling sorry for himself. Did you need something else?" she turned the tables and the subject line just as fast as he had.

"Yeah," he conceded and then revealed the reason for his visit. "Jamie had an old car manual laying around for a Chevelle that he got from Joe's girl Angie…. well, Addison's sister at one point. I got a case," he hesitated before going any further with his explanation, wondering how to weave this around so as not to draw her suspicion since she hadn't been told about the video that confirmed Jamie's account of what happened yet. "Anyway, I need to look up some numbers I couldn't find online and I was wondering if you happened to know where that book was. I know Joe had some notes written in the back on where found some of the parts when he rebuilt her. With everything going on in his head since the accident," he paused. "I didn't want to bring it up in front of the kid."

"Oh," Eddie replied as she accepted what was said as a credible excuse… certainly no need to stir that pot again, especially given her husband's recollection of the accident and the fact that Danny had managed to keep a well-practiced innocent face while making the request. "That's in the second drawer down on the left in his desk at home I think. Linda can pick it up for you when she's there if you want."

"Perfect," Danny agreed as he pulled out his phone to ask his wife to do just that on the down low while she was over tending to Jamie. "Thanks. I'll get it back to you as soon as I make some copies."

"No rush," Eddie assured. "It's not like he'll be looking for it anytime soon…" she trailed off with a bit of self pity evident.

"You okay?" Danny asked with concern for her now. "Marcus was right about one thing, you do seem down today."

"Nothing really… just frustrated being at the desk here," she answered honestly. "Feels like it's permanent now," she admitted having given up all hope of pursuing advancement and not knowing that a certain retired Police Commissioner had already put some things into the works which would soon relieve her of this stale duty. "Seriously thinking of transferring to 1PP," she admitted. "Would make your dad happy and this place… well, certain people are getting to me now."

"You're in a tough spot," Danny sympathized. "Plus having the Reagan name puts a target on your back sometimes, but I meant what I said earlier… anyone would be lucky to have you riding with them out on the street. You're a great cop, Eddie… you'll be back, and I'm gonna make sure you have at least one less loudmouth to deal with until then," he assured before saying goodbye and taking his leave to look for Marcus, finding the young man pacing back and forth nervously in the break room where he had been directed.

"Your partner know you're here?" Danny barked.

"Yeah, he heard… he's waiting for me outside," the young man admitted sheepishly as he prepared to be dressed down… hell, the whole precinct was probably aware of Detective Reagan's intentions by this point as he had not tried to quell his volume.

"Then I'll ask you again, what the eff were you thinking?!"

"I wasn't… I mean I didn't mean anything!" Marcus insisted with a stumble as his words began to twist and repeat. "I just wanted to know what my options were and thought Eddie would be able to tell me!"

"Options, what options?" Danny growled as his eyes narrowed and his brain clicked forward. Something was way off the mark here with the young man's behavior and he was determined to put it together. "Unless I missed a few signs over the years, you don't qualify for maternity leave… except if…" he pondered before the ball dropped. "OH HOLY CRAP, KID!" he hissed. "What kinda trouble did you get yourself into now? Who is she?"

"No one… I mean a cadet on the list for the next Academy class… I met her at a cop bar and she wanted to hear all about the training. One thing sort of led to another, but it was nothing! A one night stand!"

"A badge bunny? You fell for that? She's pregnant, and it's yours?!"

"Not sure, maybe?"

"Not sure she's pregnant or not sure it's yours?!" Danny growled, although he had lowered his voice in consideration for the nature of the young man's predicament.

"No, she's definitely pregnant… showed me the pictures and the ultrathingy," Marcus admitted as he slumped in a chair at the table. "She's due the beginning of July. It's complicated... I just found out the other day. She's gonna have it and put it up for adoption because she doesn't believe in doing something else and still wants to be a cop."

"And what are _you_ gonna do?" Danny asked with intent as a challenge to his protégé and a test to the values he had tried to instill in the young man as a father figure since returning from Iraq without Jimmy Beale all those years ago. "You've still got responsibility in this! I did teach you that and a few other important things you obviously forgot to pay attention to!"

"That's why I was askin' Eddie about that stuff," Marcus admitted. "I don't know what to do… or what I can do. It's not like I'm gonna marry this girl, Uncle Danny. I screwed up, and I _am_ a screw up. I can't take care of a kid on my own."

"What's your mom say about it?"

"That she's too old to start all over and her health isn't the best since she went through that cancer scare last year." Marcus admitted sadly. "I couldn't put that on her now after everything else she's dealt with since what happened to pop. She says if it's mine the best thing I could do is make sure she works with a legit place and sign it over to someone else so the kid has a chance at a good life, and a good dad… she's probably right."

"Marcus, there's no reason you can't be a good dad, you just have to want to do it, and..."

"And grow up for once, right? That's what you wanted to say. I'm sorry, I know I disappointed you, Uncle Danny, but I gotta go... my partner's waiting and we'd better get back on patrol before the boss finds out or I'll end up getting another rip on top of this," he sighed before turning around and adding. "Oh, and Mom says you can have my dad's helmet and tags for the ceremony. She'll get them to you later."

"Ceremony? What ceremony?" Danny puzzled as another twinge of panicked regret resurfaced from the past and the memory of multiple funerals with flag draped coffins played on fast forward through his mind. "Who said anything… I mean how did you find out?"

"For the anniversary, you know. Mom told me about your email. C'mon, you don't have to hide stuff like that from me," Marcus insisted vehemently before trailing off as a sinking feeling hit a certain detective's stomach with a clang. "It's not like I'm a baby anymore…"

* * *

 _So, lots happening there as Frank, Henry and even Bear are off on different missions and Dexter is just begging for some Reagan wrath, isn't he? It's coming soon as the family's patriarch arrives at the 12th for a look see while another old friend stops by to visit Jamie and our lovebirds see their NYPD careers going in opposite directions when Eddie gets the chance she's been dreaming of and Jamie calls it quits. Poor Danny is still repressing some of those feelings to the extent he's pushed off dealing with questions about this mysterious ceremony, but what will he think later on when a little TARU investigation reveals that aforementioned message had been sent in the middle of the night from his own home, and what will this Marcus wrinkle hold for the future (full disclosure - it may look obvious, but nothing is ever that simple for Danny, lol!)_


	71. Chapter 71

Chapter 71

Anthony Renzulli was uncharacteristically fidgety as he stood on the porch outside of the house at 801 Driftwood Way in Bay Ridge after ringing the bell at precisely ten o'clock that morning while precariously balancing his wife's generously sized health-minded brown rice, ground turkey, pepper, mushroom and feta casserole that happened to be Jamie's favorite, and no less than three presents for their godchild Kaylin as well as something special for his old boot, Eddie and the expected new baby. He'd found himself at this very address at various points in his career, most recently and often this past year as a doting uncle-figure to a precious little girl, but it had all started off with that memorable first visit way back in the day as a rookie at the 1-9 when he had been summoned to a call for then-Commissioner Henry Reagan's youngest grandson who had taken a nasty tumble down the stairs and hit his head… the very same youngster that he would run into occasionally through the years and would later become one of his ultimate favorite rookie partners and now his most trusted sergeant at the 3-5… was anyway Tony thought regretfully. To this point Jamie's accident and current condition had remained tightly held in strict confidence behind the walls of the Reagan family guard, but it was no secret now that it had to be pretty bad if it took so long for him to come home and a persistent Annabel who had doggedly wormed her way into the inner sanctum had taken to recruiting and organizing help for him and Eddie like this. Tony had made sure his schedule was cleared so his was the very first name on that list.

Today's visit was more akin to that first one though, complete with the abject nervousness that had washed over him when he was ordered to remain on scene with one very agitated and vocal Betty Reagan who had just witnessed her husband run out to the waiting squad with what looked to be a badly injured little boy. Renzulli was pretty sure it was only his presence in the home at that time that had spared one spitless teenaged Daniel Reagan from greater harm than he received for his role in the melee after his grandmother had proceeded to drag him down the steps by his right ear only to deposit him on his knees in the corner of kitchen with orders not to so much as turn around while she made those dreaded phone calls to her son and daughter-in-law to inform them that they needed to get to the hospital immediately… probably not unlike the notification that had come in here to this very house a few weeks ago to tell Eddie she needed to do the same, only she had been forced to endure a hurried midnight drive down to Washington with that same highly agitated brother who had knelt on the tile that day so long ago.

Renzulli was just about to ring the bell reluctantly again after glancing over and confirming that Linda Reagan's car was in the driveway before he heard her voice inside calling for him to wait just a minute before she arrived at the door smiling and inviting him in while she was dressed in scrubs and pulling off a pair of latex gloves.

"Sorry about that. Come on in, Tony," Linda apologized as she quickly balled them up and helped by grabbing the casserole dish. "I thought Eva was out here with Kaylin, but she must still be upstairs in the shower. Let me put this away in the kitchen. I'll need a few more minutes with Jamie finishing up the dressing changes before you can go in and see him," she said as she nodded back towards the dining room.

"He's downstairs?" Renzulli asked in surprise. "Must be doing better then already, eh? I thought from what Annabel said he'd be stuck up in bed. Maybe I should have brought him some work to keep him out of trouble. I'm up to my ears in papers on my desk without him running the CompStat auditing team for me."

"He _is_ in bed," Linda corrected with a tight smile that didn't reach her eyes as she realized Jamie's friend and current boss might not really have a clear idea what he was walking into as her sister-in-law had tended toward a painting a rosier picture than was actually current to those outside of the family. "He won't be able to use the steps for quite a while," she spoke softly as Kaylin had appeared at the top of the landing, having instantly recognized Renzulli's voice. "I'm not sure what you were told but Eddie had to rent a hospital bed and a wheelchair for him now. We've got him set up in the dining room," she explained as the little girl eagerly came down the stairs carefully one at a time before bounding over.

"Uncle Tony!" she cried as she latched onto his leg and eagerly looked up. "For me, p'ease?" she asked and eyed the presents wrapped in bright and happy snowman paper.

"Of course for you, half pint," he smiled as he knelt down and handed them over. "Would your Auntie Adele send me all the way over here to see you without something?" he added before shooting a worried glance back at Linda as he processed her last statement.

"Nope!" Kaylin replied enthusiastically and her smile brightened more than it had as of late. "T'ank you!" she added politely.

"You're very welcome," Renzulli grinned as he turned his attention back to the little one before reaching in his pocket and pulling out a small fancy silver snowflake embossed foil box containing a pair of ornaments Adele had found and personalized at her favorite Christmas church bazaar… two little white ceramic ovals with a cartoon rendering of a cute blue-eyed baby sitting under a patrol hat with a radio car that said "Doody Calls" and the following year's date for Jamie and a matching one that proclaimed "My Mommy Deserves a Cape" for Eddie. "And these are for your new little sister or brother," he added as he showed them to Kaylin. "Do you think you can give this to your mommy and help her hang them on your tree when she gets home later?" he asked.

"Nope," came the same reply, this time with an unmistakable frowny face accompanying it. "The baby s'not nice!" she declared before sitting down to concentrate on unwrapping one of her own presents which was obviously a favored storybook.

"Kaylin, honey, now that's not so," Linda chided the child gently with a sad hitch in her voice but without making a huge issue out of it as Eddie requested while she took the box and set it safely down on the coffee table. "Um, she's just a little mixed up after everything that's happened here all at the same time," she apologized when she caught Renzulli's concerned look. "Let me finish up with Jamie; it'll just be a few minutes."

"Are you sure?" Renzulli asked as he stood back up. "I thought I was here because you needed some help getting him up and walking around while Eddie went back to work and the other visiting nurse wasn't here every day?"

"She was hoping you would be able to help get Jamie situated in the shower, but I don't think he's up for that this morning, seems like he might have had a rough night," Linda explained. "Tony, I don't know what you've heard but right now he can't bear any weight on his leg at all and crutches are out because of all the broken ribs plus we have to be really careful with him because he lacerated his spleen and that's still healing. He can get himself in and out of the chair and bed with help, but he's been a little quiet and down today though so maybe you can perk him up. There's a big bottle of hand sanitizer over here on the counter if you don't mind," she added as she took a pump herself. "Eddie's adamant that everybody pretty much bathes in it before they get near him. I'll be back in a couple of minutes," she added hopefully before turning carefully with a mild curse under her breathe and a hand to her back as it twinged and she made her way back to the dining room.

"You've got some company," she proclaimed as she startled Jamie awake out of the light doze he had slipped into despite his best intentions. "Sorry, you seem pretty tired this morning though. Feeling alright?" she asked while noting that the antibiotic drip had finished and she began to prepare to unhook everything and flush the port. "I know better than to ask because you're as stubborn as your brother, but do you want anything for pain today?"

"No, I just didn't sleep so good again last night," he admitted while he watched her quickly and efficiently perform her tasks and then clean up the supplies including all the plastic from the multiple rolls of wrap and gauze needed to cover the incisions on his leg. "Maybe some Advil…" he conceded before sighing as she carefully slipped the brace underneath everything on his leg and prepared to fasten it back in place. "I just wish you didn't have to do that. Feels better to have it off."

"Not my call," she reminded him. "You'll have to take that up with Aaron and Doc Kenzie, but my guess is that won't be much until you get some pretty good bone callus growth over the break and regular full extension with your knee. Keeping it bent overnight will just make that harder. How's the therapy going?"

"Slow, same as everything else," he admitted with a frown while she snapped things in place, noting that changed to a tight grimace on his face when she got down near the bottom.

"Does that hurt?"

"It's rubbing or something and making my ankle a bit sore, there's pressure that's all."

"But you feel it, right?" she pointed out with a smile even as she added some extra soft padding to make it more comfortable. "Jamie, you do realize that probably means the swelling is coming down around those nerves. Hopefully it keeps going and soon you'll get the movement back down there. Can you flex your foot or point your toe at all yet?"

"No, nothing," he replied with frustration before slumping back after trying hard once more while she propped a few pillows underneath to keep it elevated. "But it's definitely not as numb up higher… feels like pins and needles now on the top of my shin. Just something else to deal with, but I guess I'll take what I can get for now."

"Just hang in there," Linda encouraged even as she doled out his requested pills and watched while he knocked them back with a little water. "Every day now you're gonna start to see more improvement. I promise. You need anything else before I get going? Eva's upstairs getting ready and Kaylin's in the living room opening up some more presents. She's got a new storybook from the Renzulli's and Tony's chomping at the bit to visit you. You want to go out there in the chair or stay in here?"

"I'm still pretty wiped out," Jamie admitted as even though Aaron had been unable to drop by that morning for PT, he felt a surprising heavy fatigue throughout his body and soreness in his joints, but he was loath to mention it now and look even more pathetic in front of his boss. "I'll stay here for a while. I guess, uh, he can just come in," he sighed as he quickly grabbed the throw blanket and pulled it over his offending leg. "If I know Sarge he won't wait much longer."

"What? Did'ja get too much of that funny koolaid in ya this morning? That's Lieutenant to you, and you're damn right I'm not just gonna cool my heels out there alone while you're just sittin' in here with your feet up, Harvard," Renzulli growled from the doorway with two cups in his hands, his impatience finally getting the best of him and he sought to disguise his shock at the current sight of his former rookie behind a gruff exterior. "What do ya think I've got all day? Eva called Kaylin back upstairs to get dressed," he explained. "I almost forgot these were in the car. Now drink up before they get cold; I got you decaf. You forced me to stop at one of those high falutin coffee palaces up the street here where they look at you like you've got two heads or somethin' when you say all you want is a large black Colombian."

"With a cream on the side," Jamie finished with a small smirk at the familiar gripe as he gratefully accepted the cup and gesture. "You really need to try one of those Latte Macchiatos."

"Reagan, I'm Italian and I must have told you a thousand times already I can't even bring myself to say that out loud in public; you know that means 'stained milk' don't you? Does that sound like something I want to fork over eight bucks for? I'd need to take out a loan against my pension if I got myself hooked on those," he joked and nodded his goodbye to Linda as she excused herself on the way out to her shortened shift at the hospital. "So… damn, kid," he trailed off with a sad tone that said everything needed as he pulled up a chair. "I knew it must be bad, but…"

"Yeah…" Jamie answered likewise in reply as he dropped his eyes. The two had worked together for so long all that was left to do was fill in the unspoken details. "Really did myself in this time, right?" he admitted with a resigned sigh.

"Any leads on the bastard that hit you?" Renzulli growled in anger at the now apparent damage this mystery driver had left in his wake. "Jesus, I'd have been by to see you sooner, but…"

"I know… I guess I was kinda off limits for a while," Jamie admitted as he grimaced once more and pushed himself up straighter when his hip began to throb. "And if you want to know about the investigation, you've gotta talk to Danny or my dad. The officer who responded that night warned them that district has only one investigator devoted to hit-and-run accidents, but it's been more like hit-or-miss, and Danny has to keep bugging him to get any action. I wasn't… I mean I'm not really in any shape to be in on that. Don't, um, really remember anything anyway," he revealed a bit distractedly as in spite of staying hands off the hard narcotics for the most part the past several days he was still feeling fuzzier mentally this morning. "And I've got other stuff to worry about."

"You got that right," Renzulli agreed although his own concern was mounting at Jamie's rather flat demeanor and lack of interest in his own case; it was almost as if his normally sharp-minded former partner had resigned himself to just give up and push that away. "Linda told me some more of what happened. It's been kind of hush hush around the precinct… we had no idea until it was out in the papers and your father went on to tear the press a new one; I mean when I finally got a hold of Eddie all she said was that you were hurt in an accident down there in DC, that you broke your leg and had some surgery so not to expect you back for a while. I guess I didn't realize…" he trailed off at a loss for words at the enormity of the situation that had been kept away. "Anyway, I'm thinking they've still got you pretty well knocked up on some good drugs after all that," he reasoned as he eyed the equipment by the bedside as a way to explain away the ambivalence and the bit of muddled thought process he had picked up on.

"Sometimes, yeah," Jamie responded as he tried to gather his senses again. The truth was he had been up most of the night after refusing his normal concession to nighttime meds in an effort to keep his mind clear for this very conversation, but that seemed to have backfired as he found himself overwhelmingly tired and unable to concentrate very well at all now. He knew he had to do though… while he was still lacking his normal sharpness no matter what he tried, a few things had started to become very clear to him and he could not afford to waste this opportunity.

"Sometimes, but not always? Kid, don't tell me you're being thick headed again and not listening to the docs now. I need my favorite second-in-command back soon before someone sends ESU into my office to drag me out when I start babbling to myself about all that damn paperwork you left me with."

"About that…" Jamie trailed off as he averted his eyes once more while his pulse quickened and he was more determined to focus than ever with that conversational open door. "Listen…"

"Now, hey, I'm just yankin' yer chain a little," the older man softened. "Patterson has really stepped up to fill in, and I got a couple of emergency temp assignments coming in next week. See that though… takes three people just to keep us afloat without ya, but there's no need to rush… you'll be back soon enough."

"Not this time," Jamie said quietly while shaking his head as he prepared to let a very big part of his life to this point go away despite his wife's enduring outward optimism. He had come to his own decision about the road he was going to take, and as much as it disappointed and hurt his heart to walk away from the job he was truly meant to have… one that was in his blood as it were... there was no sense in denying it anymore, especially since it was impacting the lives of the men and women he both looked up to and worked with.

"I'm not comin' back, boss."

There was a long shocked pause before the inevitable response. "Reagan, now you listen…" Renzulli argued as he was taken aback. This was not what he was expecting today at all. As long as he had known him… really from that first encounter after the fall down the steps as a little boy, Jamison Reagan had always come across as the teflon man… no matter how bad the crap was that got thrown his way, it never stuck to him for long and he always came out on the other side looking shiny and new. This hit-and-run accident, though… well this one had dinged him up pretty bad from the looks of it, but that was no reason to give up; he was practically born to do the job as it were. "You're _not_ quitting on me after all we've been through. I know things look a little tough right now, but don't do nothing without waiting to see how it turns out. Eddie said..."

"Please, just hear me before you say anything," Jamie begged as he interrupted and his eyes flashed up to meet his old TO for the first time. "Eddie can't or won't right now, and with her being pregnant and all I've put her through I haven't gone against her…" he paused for a few seconds and pursed his lips as his voice got rough and his throat turned into sandpaper. "She's blaming herself and won't accept… and I need… please, somebody just has to understand where I'm at."

"Sure thing, kid," Renzulli conceded with a concerned frown as he sat back and read the desperation in that statement. "You and me… we could always talk. We'll figure this out. What's going on with you?"

"This," Jamie revealed as he pulled the blanket over to reveal his heavily bandaged and braced leg. "It's effed up… as in really effed up, and not just a little… it's broken in three places. I've got a gap between the bones up here where it was shattered and more metal and pins in there right now holding it all in place than on my Dad's dress blues."

"Christ…"

"So what Eddie wants everyone to believe is that this super doc I have can put Humpty Dumpty back together again and maybe she can… she's the real deal, but even if she does… I'm never gonna be fit for the streets again," he admitted with heavy sorrow as the thought of giving up his badge knocked him back hard once more. "I talked to Rick and her without Ed before I came home… best case scenario I get full function back, but you know me, I'm always just that one perp that rabbits away from another trip down the steps…"

"You are prone to that," his CO agreed with a sigh as he sat forward and prepared himself for the next answer. "Now what's the worst case?"

"None of this takes and the first doc that saw me in DC and was prepping to amputate turns out to have been right, or worse… I get an infection, and it spreads..."

"Son of a… That's not gonna happen, do you hear me, Harvard? Now what do you need from me?" Renzulli demanded. "You know the whole damn 3-5 and 12th will be standing outside your door ready to help you with anything. You just said that best case is full function. That's what you're aiming for, right? 'Cause the guy I rode with was no quitter."

"I am though," Jamie admitted with a small shake of his head as he looked down. "I'm quitting the job, and I need your help with that, okay?" he pleaded as he lay back and crossed his hands over his eyes. "Please Sarge… I'm gonna go to Dad, but I can't tell Eddie right now because she'll freak and think I'm giving up. I'm not, I swear… but if I'm going to get through this I have to know I'm not aiming for something that's not gonna happen, alright?"

"Lieutenant," Renzulli corrected once more and frowned again. "Reagan, what's with that? Did you hit your head too?"

"No… not really, but I'm messed up there for now too," Jamie admitted. "All the anesthesia and drugs," he explained. "Whatever they used on me down in DC and the last one up here. It gave me some kind of post-op amnesia… For the first couple of hours after I woke up I couldn't even remember who Eddie was or about Kaylin and the baby and now I can't keep stuff straight like I used to, and I have to be able to do that…" he added as he thought ahead to the all important FBI assignment he had accepted. "It's all I have left. I need to... or I can't take care of my family and I need help. I could always trust you," he added as the anxiety and panic attack feeling began to ratchet up again and Renzulli could sense his friend's desperation.

"Okay, okay enough of that," Tony advised as he sought to head things off while he pulled his chair closer to the bed and put a hand on Jamie's arm to steady him. "Just ease up a bit and breathe, kid. You're getting way out ahead of yourself on this. First off, you're a Reagan… I've never seen a family more willing to circle the wagons around their own. Absolute worst case scenario, Eddie and the kids are taken care of for life, right? You got this house… no one's ending up on the street…. you have to put this into perspective. You're worried about them, but you don't have to be, not like that… so relax a little, okay? Because none of that's gonna happen, anyway. You said yourself the rest of this is from whatever they juiced you with and the super doc is telling you she's gonna fix the leg. Maybe you shouldn't be making decisions like this right now… you got time…"

"But I don't!" Jamie insisted as he stubbornly stayed on his train of thought. "Ed's pregnant and things are only gonna get harder for her. I've gotta fix some of this before… before the baby…" he paused. "There's problems there too," he admitted. "We found out her kidneys aren't working right and we have to go to Boston Children's for more tests in a couple of weeks. I can't not… can't miss… have to be there… Kaylin doesn't understand and nobody's been able to get through to her..."

"Harvard!" Renzulli barked to try to snap his former boot out of that run of spilling raw emotions before he could hyperventilate over it. "I'm sorry, kid… I didn't know about that either. Jesus," he sat back in sympathy at this apparent terrible turn of events for a young couple and a little girl he thought of fondly as his own. "Okay, we're gonna make this better… you and me… one little step at a time starting in the beginning, just like always. Now let's talk this through. What do you need from me right now?"

"I don't even know," Jamie answered honestly although that OCD penchant for order had resurfaced and he felt an overwhelming need to address something small like Rigs had advised… something that could be made right and prove to be a step forward even though this conversation was starting to exhaust him. "I feel like everything's out of place… like I've gotta start putting stuff away and back together all at the same time," he admitted blankly before settling on one practical point. "My office… if I can't be a cop anymore I don't want Eddie to have to deal with it, she's not supposed to lift. Just put everything in a box so I… I mean so you can move on and assign it to someone else…" he trailed off and considered one very special object that was held between them. "I want you to keep the softball trophy, boss… you should keep that. It belongs to the 3-5, and I… I don't anymore. Please, I need to put some of this behind me," he begged. "Please help me do this."

"Kid, now listen…" Renzulli tried to reason although emotion overcame him with the admission about that one time hotly contested prize between them… a point of intense pride for Jamie and a symbol of how he had turned a once troubled precinct around as a newly minted sergeant and brought his platoon together as a team. Renzulli's eyes misted up. That looked to be the final straw, and even he had to admit now that part of it was over… an end of an era between them; Jamison Reagan was a beat cop no more, but in the Lieutenant's mind that didn't mean he didn't still belong wearing the NYPD blue. Surely there were opportunities within the department for a Harvard-educated officer of his caliber even if Jamie wasn't in a position to see them now. "I'll keep it for the time being until we work this out and you have a place for it, whatever you need. What else?"

"Annabel… she needs to be assigned to a permanent partner… someone good. I promised her dad I would look after her."

"I'll take care of your rookie," his old TO vowed to assuage those fears too. "Don't worry about her. She can stay with Patterson for the rest of her probationary period, and she's been on a mission making sure all the little stuff around here is taken care of for you and Eddie," he revealed. "That girl takes no prisoners, so she'll be fine. Reminds me a little of you. Now quit worrying about the rest of us, that's what I get paid the big bucks for, remember? What are _you_ gonna do instead of patrol?" Renzulli prodded directly with concern. "Your dad must have somewhere in the department he can…"

"No, he won't," Jamie admitted truthfully. "He can't afford to be seen as treating me differently by giving me a bump somewhere else. I gotta make my own way. Mom and Joe… you know… he made me finish Harvard when I wanted to quit after she died. Said I needed a golden parachute in case something happened on the job. He was right… now I've got to look at other options…" Jamie trailed off while leaving out the details of his FBI offer. "And I need to take them."

"Well, if that's the case your dad is selling all of us short, and it _ain't_ right!" Renzulli insisted with frustration evident and determined that wouldn't be the case without someone pointing it out, even if it meant risking his own stripes to take on the Commissioner himself. Some things were worth making a stand for and his former partner was for damn sure one of them. "Maybe someone needs to tell him the whole effing department is gonna feel this one if he decides to let you go. It's not right to hold someone like you back just because you're his kid. You got talents we need... look what you managed to do for the 3-5, but whatever you end up doing you're gonna be great at it," he reassured in an effort to cheer an obviously depressed Jamie up while at the same time promising himself follow-up visits both at 1PP and with Detective Reagan to get the scoop on the case no matter what the effort had been to keep the lid on the situation, no doubt in deference to the press which would have just heaped another level of misery over this whole sordid mess.

###

"Good afternoon," an even-toned voice beckoned as Sergeant Dexter looked up from his work to see a bespeckled gray-haired man in a tan jacket deliberately place a takeout bag from Barnett's Deli down on the counter in front of him.

"Commissioner Reagan," Dexter addressed Henry warily as he recognized the familiar face immediately of course after serving under him when first entering the department. "So nice to see you again, sir," he fluffed with a nervous glance at Eddie's station which was empty for a moment while she was delivering a few requested papers upstairs after being summoned unexpectedly by the Lieutenant on duty in the squad. "What, um… brings you to the precinct today?"

"Just found myself in the area and thought I would stop by and check on Officer Reagan," Henry replied back with a cold, intended stare as he dressed the sergeant down immediately with his gruffest look. "It's the least I can do considering she's carrying my great-grandbaby right now and taking care of my grandson and their daughter since his accident," he reiterated. "Takes a pretty tough woman to keep all that together and still do her job, don't you think?" he challenged openly.

"Yes, sir… I supposed it does," Dexter framed his answer very carefully, fully aware that this little visit and chat with the former Commissioner was in no way an innocent encounter during a mealtime delivery and more like a veiled threat, but he had played this game with many superiors throughout his career and was not about to change his long-held opinion no matter who called him out on it. If anything it made the situation more amusing and he could not help but attempt to turn the tables a little. "It's good of you to look after her, sir. She's been… quite… I'm sorry to say... distracted since her assignment here, but given her _status…"_ he let that word drip heavily, clearly implying it was in reference to her last name, although if ever called on it by a CO he would insist it was meant to depict her current stressed, pregnant state. "Everyone here does their best to… overlook that," he trailed off, insinuating that Eddie was using her hooks and family name to paper over the cracks of incompetence. "I'm sure she needs all the help she can get."

"Well, _I'm_ sure she's doing a fine job, as always… and it's what family does," Henry bristled at the notion that his granddaughter-in-law was in some way putting in a poor performance. "We look after our own, and considering the fact that Jamison and Edit both belonged to this house, I'd like to believe that extends to their brothers and sisters in blue."

"Of course," Dexter agreed with a cynical smile that turned into an immediate suspicious frown just as he spotted Eddie rushing back down the steps with a bit more of a lilt in her gait than he'd seen in weeks. "'Bout time you came back; you have another visitor waiting," he announced gruffly as he eyed her obvious lightened demeanor before pretending to go back to his work when she drew close.

"Pop?!" she startled with an instant frown as she noticed Henry, immediately forgetting her exciting news as her concern grew. "What's the matter? Is something wrong at home? Is it Jamie?"

"No, sweetheart," he assured while picking up the deli bag to show her. "Everything's fine there as far as I know. I just had a craving for one of these sandwiches and figured you might like something to eat too since I was so close, plus I had to try out that Uber-Boober thing you told me about like all the rest of the hipsters," he joked.

"You're not fooling anyone," Eddie replied with a small smirk and a concealed nod towards Dexter with a directed glance at the stairs. "It's no coincidence that you came to check on me, but I'm fine now," she assured quietly with a knowing look. "You already knew that though, didn't you? You shouldn't have, and I love you for it, anyway."

"Well, of course you do… it's the best pastrami in the five boroughs," he covered with a grin and joined her as she walked over to her desk. "Figured you might have a busy afternoon, and I wanted to make sure you had a good lunch first. It was nothing sweetheart… a nudge, just between you and me, and no more or less than you deserve," he revealed softly after a private phone call to an old friend, Lieutenant Saunders, called in a marker that had opened up a door to Eddie in the squad upstairs while she was confined to modified assignment. "Francis and I have different views on some things… I never believed in holding anyone back if they deserved consideration, and his own career reflects that, but it's up to you now to take the opportunity and make it your own. What comes of it either way will be all on your merit and not on a last name... that I promise."

"I won't let you down," Eddie vowed, unaware that while her career in the NYPD held new possibilities, her husband had just closed out that chapter in his own and would soon be forced to make a difficult concession to make sure that his wife could take full advantage of her break in fortune without having anyone hold her back.

* * *

 _Well, Eddie finally got her big break and a path away from Dexter, but will she be able to take advantage of it or does he still have a few games to play? Next, Frank prepares to face off with Jackie at 1PP while Eva is called away from the house for a short time which unfortunately will result in renewed strife with her daughter when a desperate call to 911 is made as an upset little girl misbehaves again and scares the bejesus out of her father when he's left alone with her._

 _For the full story of Anthony Renzulli's first visit to the house at 801 Driftwood Way when a little Jamison Reagan took a memorable trip down the stairs courtesy of his older brother, see Chapter 11 "Karma with Sprinkles on Top" in the Snapshots II collection in my profile._


	72. Chapter 72

Chapter 72

"Jamison, lunch will be ready shortly. Will you be joining us out here? I'm making some honey tea, would you like some?" Eva called out as she helped settled Kaylin into her booster seat and eyed the empty hallway with some concern since her son-in-law had been slower than normal to emerge from his temporary quarters than in the past few days although she heard him moving around and deliberately allowed him the independence to decide if he required help or not... still it was worrying. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," he answered as he wheeled himself out, having pushed once more to make the bed as well as shave and freshen up at the sink on his own although truth be told he was still feeling achy and had been tempted to crawl right back under the covers once more had it not been for the fact that missing lunch would have immediately been red flagged on Eddie's noontime state of the Jamie report, and would have seen her flying home early with lights and siren blazing to check on his welfare. Given the conversation he had held with Renzulli earlier, his spirits were low but he was determined not to let onto that fact and worry his wife. "Hot tea sounds really good… I'm kinda cold right now, thanks," he acknowledged with a swallow of a dry throat as he rolled over to the table and she placed the steaming beverage down in front of him.

"If Edit's father were here, he would never understand why I choose to make this," Eva revealed. "In Serbia, tea is not served often… one only drinks Šumadijski čaj when ill. The best is made with good quality rakija, at least 100 proof over caramelized sugar… it is very strong, but he swears by its healing properties."

"So it either kills you or cures you?" Jamie reasoned with a sigh before he added rather dejectedly. "Maybe that's just what I need."

"Oh come now, you are doing very well in only a few days," Eva chided. "This will not be easy, but you said there is now feeling in your ankle? Edit will be very excited to hear. Before it was thought that might take much longer."

"No, you're right," he admitted as he looked across the table at his daughter. "I should be happy about that. Guess Daddy needs to practice something, doesn't he, sweetness?"

"Patience," Kaylin nodded a familiar reply to that question before she took an oversized bite out of her grilled cheese sandwich. "Nagym'anya say m'too," she added in muffled speech as she stuffed more in.

"She's anxious to go visit that cat again, but I told her we must finish lunch first today," Eva explained, having no way of knowing that Bear was not be found at the Reagan family dwelling on Harbor View Terrace at that time, and was in fact making his way towards his preferred home, crossing a thankfully empty street ironically in front of Mason Malevsky's house at that very moment. "Kaylin, édesem… a lady does not speak with her mouth full, and your Pop Pop is not home yet at this time. We must wait until he calls first."

"But me miss Bear!" Kaylin protested to her grandmother after a big swallow as her pitch raised an octave in frustration. "Mommy say me can go see 'im!"

"Honey, that's not a nice voice. Don't speak to Nagyanya like that," Jamie scolded his daughter gently. "You'll be able to go see Bear as soon as Pop Pop or Grandpa come back home. How about if we play another game or read one of your new books until then?"

"No, me not want to," Kaylin sulked with a frown and Eva was just about to offer a reprimand of her own before her phone started buzzing on the counter.

"Excuse me," she offered before answering the unknown number. "This is Eva Janko… Yes, that's correct, the account needs to be available by tomorrow. I am expecting a large transfer from the sale of some real estate… No, that's not acceptable, I'm currently… occupied," she insisted with a deliberate, nervous look at Jamie and her granddaughter as she listened to the caller for a few more moments. "Yes, I will hold."

"Eva, what is it?" he asked with concern.

"Someone at the bank," she informed while muting the annoying musak. "They neglected to have me sign a disclosure form while I was there and refuse to open the account until I come down and settle with them in person. It is not possible. Henry is not available to sit with you until later and Edit will not be home in time for it to process today. I need that to accept the transfer tomorrow so that the buyers may close on my house," she fretted anxiously. "I cannot give them a reason to back out."

"Then go to the bank and sign the form," Jamie urged. "It's just down the street a couple of blocks... should only take you a few minutes. Kaylin and I will be fine," he added with a small indignant challenge. "I think I can handle that much on my own."

"But Jamison, I promised Edit I would not leave you alone," Eva hemmed as she considered her limited options and the fact she had also assured her son-in-law that she would not treat him as if he were helpless.

"You're not; you're literally only two minutes away and I'll keep my phone on me and call if I need anything," he vowed. "Kaylin will help since she's such a big girl now, right baby?"

"Me finished," the little girl indicated her empty plate while pointedly ignoring his edict. "Okay go play now?"

"Yes, put your dish up on the counter by the sink," Eva directed as she frowned and drummed her fingers nervously on the counter while weighing her options. "You're sure, Jamison? You seem a bit tired and rundown today. Perhaps you are trying to do too much and need more rest. At least finish your sandwich and get into the recliner before I go. I do not wish for you to be moving around without someone in attendance."

"I'll be fine," he assured again and purposefully avoided any mention of the fact that he was feeling more fatigued and sore than at any other point at home that week. "You'll be back before we know it. What could happen?"

###

"I want to know what's happening here," Jackie Curatola hissed to her lawyer as they sat in one of the large, impressive conference rooms in the legal department wing on the fourteenth floor at 1PP. "They've been making us wait in here forever."

"Just classic mind games," her attorney Albert Martins assured as he carefully reorganized the folders and papers in his attaché for the fifth time. "Officers are taught from day one to dread a call to this building, right? You of all people should recognize when you're being sweated in the box, per se."

"Yeah, well… it doesn't mean I have to like it," she acknowledged with a frown as she sat back and crossed her legs.

"Don't worry, I'll just list it as another intimidation technique to bolster our case. If you would have only let me include Detective Reagan in this action, corporate counsel here would have already settled for more than you're asking," he advised. "That guy's a loose cannon and everyone knows it. Anyone around him would have suffered enough stress to ask for punitive damages. The department… this office in particular is responsible for that."

"Danny was my partner," Jackie declared, having snuffed out that suggestion from the beginning. "He always had my back. I don't want him jammed up in any of this, and it's not about the money. I just want the policies changed so that cops who are getting burned out don't have to be afraid of getting help before they're railroaded off the force."

"Sounds like a noble cause, too bad it has a multi-million dollar price tag attached to it," a deep baritone voice resonated from a looming figure in the doorway and startled them both. "Sort of takes the polish off your good intentions though, doesn't it? That kind of money would go a long way in setting up a program to do just that if the right person was behind it… especially one that had the head of the department's ear, or at least that of his eldest son."

"Commissioner Reagan," Jackie startled as she jumped to her feet with an ingrained sense of duty while Martins remained rudely seated.

"Well, I see Chuck Miller called in the big guns on this," the lawyer commented snidely. "Really? Using your son's relationship to Ms. Curatola as an excuse to menace her? She's not under your command anymore," he advised Frank. "Or subject to your strong-armed tactics."

"There is nothing menacing about walking down the hall in my own building and overhearing a conversation through an open door," Frank asserted although his demeanor was nothing less than stern as he lasered in on Jackie's response to the next comment. "Menacing would be using strictly held personal information purposefully to inflict a whole 'nother level of misery on a person or family… say by leaking something to the press to satisfy some personal vendetta, or would that be considered harassment?"

"Is that a threat?" Martins challenged as Jackie looked on incredulously, her still-intuitive detective brain instantly putting the pieces together with what had happened to the youngest Reagan and what Danny had told her about his suspicions regarding the return of the Blue Templar coupled with the obvious mistrust being held in a pair of sharp eyes secured behind round glasses regarding her closely from above a thick mustache at that very instant.

"You think that I would do that… to Jamie? To Danny or your family?" she managed to stutter out as she held a private conversation with her former superior that her lawyer was in no way privy too. "I would never!"

"Alright, we're done here," Martins advised as he got to his feet and quickly shoved his remaining papers into his bag. "Tell Chuck to call my secretary if he wants to depose Ms. Curatola, and he can make the trip uptown to my office next time."

"No, I don't think so," Jackie asserted as she continued to read Frank while he returned the same favor from across the room. "I'd like a moment alone with the Commissioner… off the record."

"I don't think that's a good idea," Martins contended.

"Yeah, well it's not like I was ever smart enough to let that get in my way," she admitted and waited until her attorney reluctantly walked past Frank and they heard the door close behind him before continuing. "So what Danny told me that night, about Jamie being targeted by the Blue Templar again… he was right?" she asked openly. "But they were crooked cops… and you think I'm part of it after everything we went through together to bring it down the last time?" she demanded. "Why?"

"Not any longer, but someone who knows the history and our family is behind it and I couldn't afford to be blind to the possibilities again," Frank revealed as he nodded and took a step to close the distance between them, before turning to pace on his side of the table with his hands in his pockets, having already assessed her reaction and determined it was genuine. "I don't see it as a covert group anymore… this is too personal. One or two individuals with an axe to grind at the most," he revealed before turning around to face her once more. "You were on that short list, considering the circumstances, and now that I know you're not involved we can move on. It's not just Jamie who has been marked… his daughter, his wife Eddie…"

"And Danny," Jackie surmised with a tight look as she rolled her eyes and considered the allegiance she still felt towards him. "He looked like hell when I saw him."

"They hurt his brother… both of my sons, badly, and whoever it is they've been to his house too. Like I said, it's personal," Frank agreed. "Danny has seen enough to put it together."

"And he won't rest now until it's done, will he? No matter what it takes from him."

"Not likely as you well know."

"He can't do this alone, can he?"

"No."

"And the lawsuit?" Jackie wondered as she considered what she was being asked to involve herself in again, this time from the city's top cop himself.

"Will be handled through regular channels from here on out whatever you decide. If your aim is to fight the noble cause from within the department, I can promise that you'll have my support, but if not I won't have another hand in it and it will be up to the lawyers. The investigation is unofficial for now and unrelated to that matter… just the family and you of course if you're in."

"Yeah, I'm in," Jackie sighed after several moments of hesitation as she considered both the potential heavy personal cost and benefits of that compromise. "I don't think I was ever out."

###

"DADDY! I SEE 'IM OUTSIDE!" Kaylin's panicked cries from the kitchen startled Jamie out of a daze as he sat staring blankly in the general direction of the television where one of her favorite pre-school shows was wrapping up, the bright colors and jingle jangle singing having lulled him towards nodding off despite an obvious attempt to stay awake on his babysitting watch. A glance at the clock showed that Eva had been gone for upwards of half an hour already, and little did he know that his mother-in-law was currently unleashing her signature displeasure with the delay on an apologetic branch manager summoned by an inept clerk who was scrambling to process the missing paperwork and open that needed account.

"WHO?!" he demanded in the present after flashing back on Jared Quinlan's attack in this very house given the terror in his daughter's voice and then grimacing after forgetting himself and sitting up too quickly… cursing the fact that he had no idea where his off duty weapon was at this point in time and no way to reach it so was helpless to protect himself and his child should anyone break in. "KAYLIN ANSWER ME!" he added after hearing her fumbling with the patio door latch on the other side of the high kitchen island. "NO! YOU MUSTN'T OPEN THE DOOR!"

"HIM GET HURT OUT THERE!" Kaylin insisted in a state of near hysteria as she remembered what had happened to the other kitty at her school when it had purportedly wandered into the roadway and into the path of a vehicle. "Mommy say him get hit by car 'cross the street like you! Him have to come inside!"

"A car? Baby, who do you see?" Jamie continued to ask as none of this was making any sense even as he was pulling his wheelchair over to the recliner and hastily trying to transfer over.

"BEAR HERE! Him outside!"

"Bear's _here?_ Are you sure?... What the hell?" Jamie cursed under his breath as he imagined the complete emotional disaster it would have been for his daughter if something had happened to her beloved pet who was known to be quite the escape artist, but interestingly hardly ever set paw outside of their own home. "Okay, open the door just a little, sweetie, and let him in if you see him, BUT YOU STAY INSIDE!" Jamie ordered as he was afraid something might happen in the time it took to maneuver himself into the kitchen, especially since he was feeling increasingly weak and dizzy by this point although he attributed it to the sudden stress and adrenaline that had sent his heart pumping wildly. _So much for avoiding those blood pressure spikes as promised,_ he winced.

"C'mon boy!" Kaylin shouted as she finally managed to open the door and indeed it was one very large, familiar streak of dark fur that shot into the kitchen and immediately bounded up to his preferred place on the top of the refrigerator within seconds to regard them with an agitated, fiercely twitching tail and glaring, iridescent green eyes that locked onto Jamie with unusual suspicion as he was sitting below in his wheelchair.

"Hey, Bear… buddy… easy there," he tried to soothe the nervous animal who was now offering his trademarked low rumbling cougar growl and looking at him with intent as if he were a stranger in his own home.

"Daddy, he no likes you anymore!"

"I know, baby… he's just a little scared right now," Jamie explained quietly as he slowly tried to back away while hoping and praying that the cat would remember and not launch into one of his twenty pounds of solid muscle blitz ninja attacks or Eddie would have an absolute fit when she got home and the last thing he wanted to do was send Kaylin's four-footed friend away from the house again when it was clear the little girl needed the familiar company for comfort.

"Daddy just seems… different to him. That's why Mommy said he needed to stay at Pop Pop's house while I was home."

"BUT HIM WANT TO BE HERE! She make him go back and him run 'way and get dead 'gain!" the little girl shouted and determined that was not going to happen on her watch no matter what her Mommy and Daddy told her. "C'MON, BOY! YOU HIDE UP'TAIRS WITH ME!" she urged while running towards the steps as Bear decided to follow with a lightning fast, calculated bound off the breakfast bar counter aimed directly at Jamie, thankfully only brushing by slightly left at the last second as he missiled past his shoulder.

"Damn, that was close," he huffed in relief at the fact the cat had avoided a direct hit on his still heavily injured side and turned the chair to watch as the bonded pair of the little girl and her pet streaked upstairs. "Kaylin, honey… come down here," he called up at her after slowly wheeling himself over to the landing. "Daddy can't go up there now," he reminded. "You promised to stay downstairs with me until Nagyanya came home. Come here and talk to me like a good girl."

"NO! YOU MAKE BEAR GO BACK!" she cried and slammed her bedroom door closed before struggling to slide her chair in front of it to form a blockade, determined that her cat would not end up like the unfortunate one she had seen at the school with red all over. "ME AND 'IM STAY UP HERE!"

"Great, now I've got a hostage situation with a barricaded three-year-old perp on my hands and I feel like crap," Jamie moaned as he rubbed his temple when a searing headache made its presence known and joined the angry protest of aching joints which had been growing in intensity all morning, but had become especially acute since his mother-in-law left. "Eva's gonna love this when she gets home," he reasoned and considered that Advil he had taken earlier had done little to help without realizing there was an underlying cause which would soon give them all grounds for serious concern. "No, scratch that… Eddie's just going to kill us both and no one will ever find the bodies," he sighed with dread at the thought of trying to explain the current situation to his wife.

Meanwhile upstairs, Kaylin was still determined to fortify the entry and continued to pile things on the chair in an effort to spare Bear another exile at Grandpa's house as he watched her movements from his perch on her bed. "Me put this there too," Kaylin informed him as she reached up to the top of her tallest dresser where Eva had left a pile of laundered bedding to put away and yanked on a corner of the blanket draped over the side in order to pull it down. Unfortunately that toppled her most cherished tall, fancy soccer trophy that had been earned during the Blue Shieldz undefeated fall season and it tipped over and fell top first from height, striking the little girl right above the eye with the sharp edge of the little figurine and causing her to fall backwards onto the floor and against the chair with a heavy bang and a high-pitched blood-curling scream that immediately alerted her father downstairs that something was terribly wrong as his heart clenched.

"KAYLIN! KAYLIN! WHAT HAPPENED?!" Jamie thundered in fear as he remained trapped in his chair at the bottom of the steps and unable to reach her. "ARE YOU ALRIGHT? ANSWER ME!"

"OW, OW!… ME SEE RED ALL OVER!" she cried after a swipe of her hand over her eye was pulled back with a heavy trickle of blood showing from the head wound. "OW, DADDY 'ELP ME! IT 'URTS!"

"Oh, sweet Jesus, Mary and Joseph!" Jamie panicked just as his beloved Grandma Betty had done for him with those same words in this very spot all those years ago after that tumble down the stairs. Every fiber of his being told him to get to his injured child immediately, no matter the cost, but first he reached over to the alarm panel on the wall to hit the pre-programmed instant 911 button and unlock the front door, not bothering to fish around for his phone which had slipped down into the netting of the pouch on the side of the chair.

"DADDY'S COMING, BABY!" he vowed and swung himself over until he was seated backwards on the third step, determined to drag himself and his effing braced leg up there one at a time until he reached her.

* * *

 _Hm, well so Jackie has been brought back in the fold for the investigation, at least for the time being, but all that is going to have to take a bit of a backseat for the next few chapters as Eva regains her mommazilla status and deals with the current crisis at home which will offer a few surprises considering the once contentious relationship she had with her son-in-law._

 _To follow up on some of the comments from the previous chapter, especially for the guest reviewers since I can't reply personally (and I do love that it provoked some dissention because that does influence future "werks"!)... yes, Henry was purposefully made a bit naughty there, but he's always struck me as being the "kind of cop he had to be" for his time, i.e mentions of wood shampoos, looking the other way with his mob counterpart on a cop killer case, etc., whatever it took to get things done and it has gotten him in trouble before, lol. While he did break chain of command (a definite big ethical no no for Frank, who sometimes IMO goes overboard in the opposite direction and withholds deserved promotions and recognition for his kids, particularly for J… something he will struggle with here too), Henry only cracked the door and it's not going to guarantee Eddie will get any further than desk work for the detectives while she is on modified, and may in fact hinder her. While initially excited, once she comes down from her cloud she'll admit herself to Jamie that it was unfair, although he will continue to encourage her like the good hubby we know he usually tries to be. Some of this is a bit of setup for the next installment as Eddie's journey to her gold shield will not be such a quick or easy one and it might very well be her last name (one of them) that keeps it out of reach._


	73. Chapter 73

Chapter 73

"Jamison!" Eva exclaimed as she hurried up the steps after pushing unceremoniously past two officers from the 1-9 who were waiting for further orders and found him looking ghostly pale and sweaty sitting on the ground propped up against the linen closet at the end of the hall next to the closed door of Kaylin's room while shaking his head and refusing treatment as an EMT was down on one knee next to him and trying to convince him otherwise.

"Ma'am, he's a little shocky looking and diaphoretic, but not allowing me to check his vitals. We should really…" the young man started as soon as she arrived at her son-in-law's side.

"I can see that!" she cut him off abruptly with a frown as she took in the scene and Jamie's downturned dull expression and still-labored breathing. Obviously the stress from his daughter's cries and the strain of coming up the stairs in that fashion had been too much for him and Eva was desperate to handle this situation before her daughter arrived home to see all the emergency vehicles parked out front and her husband and Kaylin in such a condition. Indeed, the older Janko woman had been driven into her own panicked state at the sight of an ambulance and patrol cars rushing past the bank in the direction of the house just as she had finally resolved the required paperwork and was ready to leave after fretting about being gone for so long. "Please go wait downstairs and let me speak to him privately for a moment," she demanded in her no uncertain terms tone which had the medic reluctantly conceding and scurrying away in mere seconds to do her bidding without protest.

"Jamison, I'm so sorry," she softened as she knelt down next to his left side. "I should have never left you. Kaylin is fine… she's outside. It's just a scratch. All she needs is a little band-aid and some of that terrible ice cream," she assured as she put a hand on his shoulder, having first stopped to check on her granddaughter who had been taken out to the waiting ambulance to be cleaned up and was now in the care of one of the female officers on scene. "You must calm yourself and breathe. We'll get some of these men to help you down the stairs and have you freshened and changed before Edit comes home..."

"I couldn't get to her," he admitted in a low, shaky voice as his eyes lifted. "It could have been a fire… God! She was hurt and I couldn't help her!" he admitted with guilt and a heavy swallow as he pushed himself weakly up tighter to the wall with a pained grimace as the big unyielding brace snagged on the throw carpet and shifted, driving pressure points unmercifully into the remaining swelling over his knee. "I couldn't even open the door!" he slammed his fist against it, startling Bear who dove under the bed inside, having been shut in once more to spare the first responders from his wrath after the little girl was retrieved. "She would have been trapped up here… alone..." he huffed, still unable to catch his breath as the terror of that realization refused to lift. "My fault! I scared her… I can't even take care of my own family anymore..."

"No, no, no," Eva interrupted once more. "This was an accident, nothing more and we will learn from it…" she trailed off as she tried to soothe and straighten him up a little and her hand brushed lightly against the side of his face; she could clearly feel heat radiating off of him now. This was more than just the result of exertion and suddenly the specter of the infection they had been warned about numerous times loomed above like a choking cloud as fear stabbed through her heart. "Jamison! You're burning up!" Eva cried as her hands fell on him more firmly now as she felt his warm, perspiring forehead and both cheeks in rapid succession. "Oh, no! We must get you back to that doctor!" she determined as she pushed herself up to her feet and her heels clipped in fast succession as she hurried back down the hall.

"Couldn't get there… my sweetness…" he mumbled in a soft, raspy voice as his head sank back against the wood panel and his eyes closed while he gave into the all-over body fatigue and aches that now consumed him. "M'm sorry…"

"Young man!" Eva shouted down the stairwell to the waiting medic, now in a renewed panic. "He needs help up here this instant!" she ordered in a shrill timbre that had the EMT scrambling back up to the second floor with his pack once more in double-time followed closely by the two waiting officers. "You!" Eva stopped the first with a firm pointed finger to the chest. "Officer... McBride!" she ordered with a deliberate glance up and down at his nameplate as she blocked his path. "You run up the street to the Police Commissioner's house on Harbor View right now and fetch Jamison's grandfather, Henry Reagan, and tell him he needs to come here immediately!"

"Ma'am, I can't leave the scene of an active call without clearance…"

"THEN GET IT!" she bristled with all the intent and presence of an angry five-foot-two, hundred-pound soaking wet pit bull as Mommazilla rose from the ashes in full glory, this time resolved to do whatever was needed to take care of her extended family in this instance, and if that meant throwing her daughter's new last name and relations around, then so be it. "Or I will tell Commissioner Reagan that you personally, Officer McBride, would rather I leave his injured granddaughter here with strangers unattended while his son is rushed to the hospital!" she snapped. There was no way she was putting an already upset and shaken Kaylin through the trauma of an ambulance ride all the way uptown with her father in this condition and Eva had no intention now of leaving his side until she saw him into the right hands at Columbia, or heaven help her, Eddie would have her head plated and put on full display somewhere from now until the end of time.

"Yes, ma'am!" the young second-year patrolman stuttered at that dressing-down as he turned around to do as ordered while his hand flew to his shoulder radio calling into Central for an additional unit before his thudding feet even reached the bottom landing while his partner waited for the direction that was obviously coming from this small, but intimidating force of a woman who had assumed control of the scene.

"We need the other man from the ambulance and help to get him downstairs," she stated the obvious as her blue eyes flashed. "See to it we have that!" she ordered before turning around and hurrying back towards Jamie where the medic was already setting about attending to him.

"Okay, now Mr. Reagan…" he was starting.

"Jamie," Eva insisted as she joined them. "He prefers to be called by that name," she added even though not once in their acquaintance could he ever remember her using that less formal version for him.

"Jamie Reagan," the medic corrected immediately with a little nod of recognition now and even in his current condition, her son-in-law gave a small huff of a laugh at the power of this little Janko matriarch as he could plainly see where Eddie had inherited her momma bear prowess. "My name is Eric Wagner. I'm just going to check you out here and see if we can figure what's going on today, okay? You're on the job, right? A sergeant in Midtown?" he asked and received a hesitant confirming nod as Jamie considered the current truth of the matter and his intent to resign. "Thought so… I just transferred houses down this way, but I know I've seen you around before. So that's the deal. I take it from the looks of things you've had some surgery on your leg recently?" he questioned while wrapping the blood pressure cuff around his patient's right arm and puffing it up.

"Four," Eva countered as in her haste she ignored the fact that the medic was trying to gauge Jamie's responsiveness with the questions. "He was struck by a car in a hit-and-run accident while away on a trip in Washington DC the first week of this month," she informed. "An open fracture of the femur, broken tibia, fibula and five ribs, pneumothorax and a lacerated spleen," she ticked off. "My daughter said they did some sort of coil thing for that the first night."

"Angioembolization," the EMT surmised as he began to get the big picture which was becoming more concerning by the minute as that injury would have surely left Jamie with a compromised immune system while he healed.

"He's had two major operations on his leg so far and one on his hip to harvest for a bone graft. They warned us about the likelihood of infections! Is that what this is?"

"Well, it's on the list of possibilities, but let's not get ahead of ourselves," Eric urged restraint as he finished his reading and his partner appeared at the far end of the hall lugging up several more bags and a small oxygen tank. "That would need to be confirmed by a blood test once we get you into the hospital," he explained. "Pressure's low 98 over 61," he hummed a little as a thermometer scan confirmed what was already apparent. "Temp's 102.8. Resting pulse is a little high at 116. Where do you hurt, Jamie?"

"All over," he revealed with a helpless weary grimace. "Head, joints… my back…"

"Jamison!" Eva chided with a gasp. "Why didn't you make mention of this to me before I left?"

"And the leg… rocking some fancy new titanium hardware in there I presume?" the young, but very skilled medic pried as he ignored Eva's comment in an effort to stay connected with his patient and looked at the intricate bandaging and brace as he considered whether it was prudent to remove any of that in the field at this point before deciding against that plan of attack if at all possible.

"Sort of goes without saying," Jamie countered with a dejected sigh and a little shiver up his spine as he began to shake with the chills. "Two um… what do you call them?... intra-something nails and whatever else they could screw in there to fill the gaps I guess," he added without getting into the whole outer space-sounding classified top secret ex-military 3D printed bone matrix saga.

"So a bone graft on an open comminuted fracture already… that's not risky at all," Eric mused to himself as he got his stethoscope out and began to listen to various areas of Jamie's chest and back. "Decreased breath sounds, rales on the left," he confirmed to his partner. "Low pressure, shaking chills and shortness of breath. All right, let's get the oxygen on him, Mark. I'm gonna start an IV. What meds have you taken today?" he asked as he readied his supplies. "Jamie?" he queried after a pause as his eyes came up and he noticed his patient starting to zone out with decreased pallor.

"Oh, um… the antibiotics," he admitted as he struggled suddenly to remember the names as a numbing fog descended. "Cefa something maybe? I'm not sure…" he trailed off in a long, labored pause. "My sister-in-law's a nurse at St. Vic's… you probably know… um, Linda Reagan… you can ask her; she comes by to inject it in my port, and… couple of Advil."

"Cefazolin probably, and Advil," Eric stated flatly as both EMTs raised their eyebrows while Mark reached in and got the oxygen mask situated after somewhat insistently pushing a still-flustered and ruffling Eva out of the way in the close quarters of the hall and back into the bathroom doorway. "Nothing stronger for the pain?"

"Nope," was the now-tiring unrepentant response as the last thing Jamie needed at this point was any sort of another lecture on that decision, although the way he was feeling at that moment he was tempted to request they just go ahead and put him completely out of his misery in some fashion.

"He won't have any of it except at night to help him sleep the last few days since he's been home," Eva reported as she jostled her way back unapologetically over to the forefront at Jamie's side with a irked glower that dared either of them to try that move again or risk losing a limb of their own. "He's afraid of the side effects."

"Like being able to move or breathe without pain?" Eric chastised while shaking his head with a low whistle as he went about inserting the IV. "Sorry, I'm gonna stick you myself since I don't know what your port protocol is. I've seen tough guys before, but you Sergeant Jamie Reagan take the cake. Did your nurse-friend from St. Vic's change the bandages recently too? These look fresh. Any signs of unusual redness or discharge for any of the incisions? When did you start feeling sick?"

Jamie shook his head no. "She stopped over this morning," he admitted in a now-weakening shallow rasp as the plastic oxygen mask started to fog up at an increasing interval. "But I was okay until I came up here after my daughter," he insisted as he caught Eva's disapproving eye which triggered an automatic response from his childhood. "I swear, Mom!" he stated using a term that both surprised and put her on edge as her eyebrows jumped and his head settled back with eyelids drooped to half mast and an odd hum in his ears became distracting. "M'm feeling kinda tired now guys."

"Yeah, well you've got a fever spiking… up a point three in just a few minutes. Something is definitely going on here. Let's book so the docs can have him," Eric advised Mark after repeating the temperature check. "We'll alert his sister-in-law on the way in to get the scoop on his meds. Get the backboard and some of those unis up here to help carry him and our gear and we'll need one to steady his leg in this brace if we can't get it locked down straight. Not a big guy, we should be able to handle getting him down the stairs that way even with that wide turn at the top of the landing to navigate. Gotta be careful of that spleen and these ribs though," he reminded as he pulled Jamie's tee up to have a look and did a double take at what he saw. "Jesus, man... that must have been a helluva hit you took!"

"Don't m'ember…" Jamie slurred with the now automatic reply, sparking a sudden sense of urgency that was palpable among the other three in the hall with him.

"Okay, nix that plan," Eric demanded after noting his patient's rapidly deteriorating mental status and already extensive bruising. "We gotta go now. I'm afraid to strap this guy down hard anywhere and the last thing he needs is for us to drop him down the steps or move those ribs and puncture a lung. Get that bodybuilder-type uniform from the 1-9 that was outside, what's-his-name, Marshal? I'm thinking he can sort of cradle him and walk down in this sitting position if one of us takes the leg. Reagan's like 160 if that, should be a piece of cake for him."

"Got it," Mark agreed as he hustled down the steps taking some extraneous equipment with him to clear the field.

"WAIT! Where are you taking him?" Eva demanded as she latched onto the remaining medic's arm with urgency. "He must go to Columbia… Dr. MacKenzie has him in a clinical trial there! She's done some type of new procedure on his leg and it can't be compromised!"

"Ma'am, it's policy to transport to the nearest medical center in cases like this, and that would be St. Victor's. Columbia is more than an hour away over the FDR in a bus and I'm hearing some congestion in his lungs. Could be a drug-induced fever from the antibiotics, the start of pneumonia, sepsis or an embolism from the open fractures or his spleen. With his temp spiking we can't take the chance he has that kind of time to waste."

"No, it has to be Columbia!" Eva insisted in desperation as her voice notched up in pitch just as Henry arrived downstairs calling out for her and his grandson, having snatched a still-upset and inconsolable Kaylin away from the female patrol officer charged with watching her and he carried the little girl inside as she clung to his neck tightly and hid her face while crying in his ear for her Pop Pop.

"EVA!" the Reagan family patriarch barked when he spotted her near the top of the landing as she rushed over once she heard him come into the middle of the chaotic scene which was seemingly growing in proportion by the minute as more units arrived. "WHAT IN THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?!" he thundered unapologetically. "Where's Jamie? What's wrong?! And what's he doing _upstairs?"_ he demanded just as Mark arrived back inside with the gurney in tow and a virtual mountain of a man that Eva could only surmise was this Officer Marshal they were speaking of.

"Henry, I'm so sorry!" Eva cried as she hurried her way down to speak to him while the other men rushed back upwards past her on the steps. "I just stepped out for a short time to file some papers at the bank," she apologized while wringing her hands in distress. "Kaylin somehow hurt herself in her room and wouldn't come down so Jamison went up for her after calling for help. I came back home to find all this!" she exclaimed as she looked around in a guilty panic. "He has a fever now, but they insist on taking him to the wrong hospital! He's supposed to go to Columbia for his leg! Edit was very clear! I promised her I would look after him! You _must_ order these men to listen!"

"Oh, dear God in heaven," Henry murmured softly as he looked up to see his listless grandson being gingerly carried down the steps like a small broken child by the brawny six-foot-four officer and two medics and he knew immediately why they were headed for the nearest facility. "Jamie!" he called as they were settling him down in the same upright sitting position on the gurney and a pair of obedient hazel eyes opened above the fogging oxygen mask but stared back rather blankly, although there was obvious relief at seeing his daughter in good hands. "It'll be alright, son," his grandfather assured as he hurried over and could likewise feel the heat now radiating off of him. "I've got her. She's fine. You can see; it's just a scratch. We'll get you taken care of too. I'll call and have Linda waiting… she can explain about Dr. Kenzie's study, and I'll get ahold of Eddie and your Dad. You just hang in there, okay?" A small grateful nod was all that was offered before a blanket was thrown over his shivering frame and carefully secured before the gurney started to move quickly off through the front door.

"Wait!" Jamie rasped as his hand shot out and grabbed Henry's shirt as they were going down the porch steps. "No! Keep her 'way!" he pleaded in a huff. "Please, Pop… the baby… m'm sick... Dr. Geisner said Ed had to stay away from that or it's bad for them. I don't want her there in case… please, she has to keep our baby safe," he trailed off as the effort to speak and breathe at the same time was too much at that point.

"What? Why did he say that?!" Eva flustered as she and Henry hovered closely behind while they approached the ambulance. "AND WHY WON'T ANYONE LISTEN TO ME AND TAKE HIM TO THE PROPER HOSPITAL?!" she railed hysterically with a stomp as her temper came back. If anything, Eva Janko was not accustomed to being ignored like this by anyone.

"They need to get him stabilized first," Henry tried to calm as he took her arm as his years of experience as a beat cop at scenes just like this with frantic family members came back to the forefront. "Columbia is too far, and Eva, he's just worried about Eddie being exposed to something while she's pregnant. He's afraid he's contagious and she'll get sick too. Now come on, I'll have one of the officers drive us over there in her car. Linda will be…"

"NO!" Eva demanded as she broke his grasp and climbed up in the ambulance in her heels and sat on the bench next to her son-in-law before the doors could be closed, much to the dismay of the EMTs since it was obvious from her tone and actions she had no intention of being talked out of the vehicle. "Henry Reagan, I promised my daughter I would look after Jamison, and if Edit cannot be with him, that's what I intend to do!" she vowed and left the older man standing in the street holding a little girl and shaking his head as they pulled away from the curb, lights and sirens flashing.

* * *

 _Poor Eva, being thrown back into this momma thing in the middle of a Reagan family crisis is probably a bit more than she bargained for at first, but she's developed a soft spot for her new son-in-law and of all people she's going to be determined to see him through this next part when a little tough love mothering is exactly what he needs._


	74. Chapter 74

Chapter 74

"Where is Edit, and why hasn't anyone been able notify her yet?!" Eva railed as she paced the waiting area of the Emergency Department of St. Victor's hospital with her trademarked heels making a telling frustrated clipping sound across the linoleum floor as she stalked back and forth in front of the double admitting doors where the nurses had stopped her from following Jamie… her agitated demeanor now seeing the rest of the patients and visitors slowly relocating down to safety at the other end of the room. "She's not answering her phone and I've called the front desk of her precinct twice. TWICE!" she reiterated as she passed Henry and Kaylin sitting in the front row of chairs… the only two that dared to be that close to her at this time. "That awful Sergeant Dexter was of no help at all and would not transfer me to his superior! Edit is the one that's supposed to be answering the phone and he claims not to know where she is at the moment! How can that be?!"

"Eva, please sit down," Henry tried once more. "I was just at the 12th dropping off a little something for her lunch before this happened and she was at her desk. She might have just stepped out on her meal and forgot to take her phone. We'll find her," he assured, fluffing over the fact that Eddie was likely excited to be upstairs in the squad after having been invited to join the detectives in the bullpen for a department meeting, but unaware that Sergeant Dexter had spitefully chosen to ignore her mother's request to contact her because of that.

"I wish Linda would come out already and let us know what's happening," Eva continued to fret even as she conceded to his wishes and sat down next to them. "His fever went to nearly 104 in the ambulance before we got here and he was having more problems breathing," she revealed. "Henry, what if…?"

"He'll be fine," the Reagan family patriarch assured, although he was more frightened himself by that dull look in Jamie's eyes as they were taking him out than he was letting on in front of Eddie's already distraught mother and his little great-granddaughter who continued to cling to his side.

"Pop Pop, are they gonna fix Daddy's boo-boos all better this time?" Kaylin looked up and asked sadly with big tears welling up in those light blue eyes again, feeling guilty even as young as she was for not listening to Jamie and going upstairs. "I 'orry for being bad," she cried against him once more as all the stress she felt from resonating from her grandparents compounded with the complete circus of a scene that a little bump had caused with police and EMTs invading her house and brought back the fears from Quinlan's home invasion again.

"No, no, sweetheart… please don't be like that," Henry assured as he hugged her and kissed the top of the little girl's head. "This isn't your fault. Your Daddy was just worried about you so he needed help, but he got sick from some germies like we wash our hands for, not because of anything you did and Auntie Linda and the other doctors will make him better. You'll see," he added and prayed extra hard that was the case for all of their sakes.

As if on cue, his older granddaughter-in-law appeared through the doors and motioned them to a smaller private waiting room down the hall. "He's stable, but up to 104.5," Linda revealed as she sat back down opposite the pair. "They're moving him into an ICU room because of the fever. We've got him on oxygen and under cooling blankets and I managed to convince Dr. Jorgen not to pull the wraps off or do any films on his leg while we wait for the blood work to come back since I told him I had just changed the dressings myself this morning and there were no signs of anything wrong then. His other incision sites look fine too. He did get a chest x-ray, and that showed what might be the start of pneumonia in his left lung though. I called Dr. MacKenzie, and she's on her way from Midtown right now but it's gonna take her some time to get here in traffic. Where's Eddie?" she questioned. "Jamie's not lucid at all right now and if the results come back bacterial, it's gonna take someone with medical power of attorney to direct his care to another hospital."

"Francis is on his way," Henry revealed, silently thankful now for Erin's perceived interference with the power of attorney paperwork even if it had caused a temporary rift in the family. "Jamie made him a successor so he could have a say if Eddie wasn't available. We haven't been able to reach her at work yet. Erin's in court. What about Danny?"

"On a stakeout in Yonkers," Linda answered. "I told him I would call back as soon as we knew anything."

"Linda, worst-case what could this be?" Henry asked with a pointed look at Kaylin as a request the answer remain g-rated and appropriately disguised for the upset pre-schooler's ears.

"Osteomyelitis… infection in the bone or anything like it that's gone septic," she revealed evenly. "Even if the results come back negative from the draw, they'll want to do a biopsy to make sure. If it is…" she added with a grim shake of her head that Kaylin couldn't see.

"Oh, my… well..." Eva sighed and cleared her throat while likewise trying to quell her response in front of her granddaughter. "I'm going to try Edit again," she said before jumping to her feet to resume pacing down the hall this time just as Frank arrived flanked by his detail and the two stopped for words as she hurriedly explained everything that had happened and was known so far.

"Pop," Frank huffed in acknowledgement with an embrace for Linda before she took her leave to go in the back as he approached and he reached down to pick up Kaylin for a tight hug and kiss. "It's okay, sweetheart," he assured as he inspected the bandaged boo boo over her eye and his eyes grew moist at her grip around his neck while he breathed in the smell of her baby shampoo as a tonic.

"Now, we don't know anything yet, Francis," Henry warned as he saw the cracks his own son's armor coming out on full display. "Until we do let's not go there. He's beaten everything else that's been thrown his way so far. This is just another bump and the kids need us to stay strong for them right now."

"If you say so," Frank nodded as he prayed with all his heart that was true and turned while Eva approached with pace in her step once more.

"This man from _your_ department!" she hissed as she neared and shook her phone with equal frightening venom at each of the commissioners, causing one of the detectives in Frank's detail to step forward before a quiet, knowing hand up from his boss stopped his advance. "This Sergeant _Dexter_ is the most unhelpful… most…" she railed as her eyes flashed once more while she stopped herself from speaking freely in front of young ears. "He refuses to locate _my_ daughter even though I told him it was a family emergency! He says she stepped away from her desk and I know he has made no effort!"

"Call him again and put the phone on speaker," Frank advised, his own dander rising at the situation, and the obvious need now to have Eddie present for any and all decisions that might have to be made.

"Twelfth Precinct, Sergeant Dexter speaking," came the amused tone through the phone as he had obviously been screening the call after Eva dialed and held it up. "How may I help you?"

"This is Eva Janko once more, Sergeant," she replied through pursed lips with an added stomp of her foot. "As I told you before it is imperative that I speak to my daughter immediately! Her husband has been taken to the hospital with a fever!"

"Ma'am, and as I've already told you, Officer Reagan is not at her desk," he reported in a condescending voice that told them plainly he was unconcerned with such a plight. He was tired of excuses like that from these women on the job… the old 'my child has a fever' ploy. Now this Janko woman was trying with an adult and he wasn't buying it. Why should he care if the Golden Boy was sick? He should just man up and down a few aspirins and get over it like the rest of them. "I've left a note, checked the entire floor and even tapped on the ladies room door since that's where these knocked up mommy cops tend to end up for half the day while the rest of us do their work. I'm sorry, but I'm busy and you'll have to try back later."

Henry raised his eyebrows, shook his head and slapped a hand over his mouth at the man's stupidity, especially with the rather obvious knowledge of who Eddie's father-in-law was, and braced himself for what he could only anticipate was going to be his son's scathing reply to that level of unprofessionalism. "Dear, God," was the only comment he could offer under his breath.

"OFFICER DEXTER!" Frank barked in his unmistakable deep growling tone and there was the immediate sound of the receiver being dropped on the other end as the unclad implied threat was received loud and clear.

"Yes… yes, sir?" came the mollified reply back after a short scramble.

"Did I just hear you refer to a decorated member of the NYPD as a 'knocked up mommy cop' in public to her own mother while you were in an official capacity?! Might I remind you that Officer Reagan is carrying someone's grandchild at this time?!"

"Sir, no, sir! I mean, yes, sir! My apologies, sir!" Dexter fumbled over himself as he jumped down off his stool and hurried around the counter before hitting the end of the phone cord and spinning back around, much to the amusement of the rest of the room, including Kara and Wilson who had just returned from patrol with a suspect in custody.

"Humph. What a jack… ahh, little duckie," Henry griped in the background under the radar.

"Officer Reagan's presence is required forthwith at St. Victor's Hospital, is that understood?"

"Yes, sir! I'll take care of it myself, personally," Dexter assured.

"You'll see to it personally that Officer Reagan is located and escorted here by a member of her own platoon," Frank responded with no less vigor as it was not the first time a complain of this nature had crossed his desk regarding this particular sergeant, the others having remained unsubstantiated before this, unfortunately. "You personally have one hour to report with your CO to Lieutenant Gormley's office at 1PP. You'll be facing charges of nonfeasance and he will investigate whatever other dereliction of duty allegations have come up with connection to your time at the 12th and the 2-9. Understood? You'll be lucky to see a demotion in grade to transit in Staten Island!"

"Yes, sir," Dexter huffed as he hung up and pursed his lips, knowing his job and pension had likely just crossed the Verrazano on a direct line into the dumpster so there was no need to offer any atonement. "You," he pointed to Kara. "Find your lady friend upstairs in the squad. Her mommy's been calling. Get her over to St. Vic's before she's a widow too," he added curtly before picking up an empty box from behind the desk and heading towards his office.

"Wait, what?" Kara's face fell as she looked Wilson in shock as the realization of what that could mean hit them both, knowing full well from a conversation previously that morning that Eva had been reluctantly put in charge of Jamie and Kaylin again for the day.

"Go, I got this mutt," Wilson advised as he shook his head and pushed the perp towards the desk while Kara made a beeline towards the steps only to find Eddie exiting the conference room while smiling and thanking Detective Rivera and the Lieutenant for the invitation as the rest of the unit emptied out.

"Kara, it was so cool!" Eddie gushed as in her excitement she failed to see the tight lines on her friend's face. "Lieutenant Saunders did a case review for the whole squad and offered to assign me to the research desk up here so I can help out on real investigations! No more answering phones downstairs! Well, actually lots of phone calls and computer searches, but I'll really be helping them out! I'm so excited! I start on Monday! The Lieutenant said he would clear it with Dexter himself! I'm really gonna get a chance to work on my gold shield!"

"Eddie," Kara started as she took her friend's arm and led her back towards the stairs. "Ed, we have to get your stuff and go," she advised as calmly as she could while hanging on.

"Go where? Kara what's wrong?" Eddie's asked as her face fell. "What happened?"

"I'm not sure. Dexter said your mom's been calling and they're at St. Vic's. Where's your phone? He's been blowing her off. The Commissioner just got on the line and tore him a new one. He's packing his stuff to go to Gormley's office," she advised as they got to the bottom floor and Eddie took off at a run to her desk.

"Jamie's dad's there too?! Oh, no, no, no!" she cried as she flung the desk drawer open and pulled out the device, the screen full of missed notifications as it came to life. "Mom! Mom, what happened?" she demanded as Eva responded to the call back. "WHAT?! How could you leave them alone! Is she…" Eddie paused as she tried to catch her breath while the explanation came regarding Kaylin and the initial 911 call. "But then why are you... Oh God!" came the reply as the full extent of the situation was offered. "No, Kara's bringing me now… I don't know, like fifteen?" she explained before being guided into the woman's dressing room to grab the purse and jacket hanging in her locker. "Tell him I'll be there soon, okay?" she begged even while being pushed out of the precinct's front door by her friend and towards the waiting RMP out front.

"Jamie's in… he's got a high fever," she explained shakily as she slid into the passenger seat while Kara hit the lights and sirens and pulled away from the curb. "So bad they won't take him to Columbia. Dr. Kenzie is driving down from some meeting around here. He was fine when I left this morning!… He insisted I come in even though he looked tired!… My mom left them alone for an hour and came home to a full response. He had to call 911 because nobody else was home! God, what if?"

"Hey, don't go there," Kara advised as she skillfully wove through traffic. "Brandon gets high fevers all the time and they pop out of nowhere, right? Could just be a cold or something like that he picked up since his immune system isn't so good…"

"The party!" Eddie cried as she smacked her forehead. "I dragged him out go see Kaylin's soccer practice the other night, and the kids had a little get well party afterwards for him… I thought it would cheer him up and help her see he was getting better, but they were all over Jamie when he was sitting there! I told everyone that we had to be careful and stay back from him, but the kids mobbed him, anyway! Kara, why was I so stupid?!" she wailed.

"Eddie, you weren't stupid… okay? You just wanted to make everyone feel better, but don't you see?" Kara encouraged as she hung a left as they were approaching the hospital. "That makes complete sense. If Reagan has something like that… a regular cold he picked up from the kids then his leg is fine and this doesn't have anything to do with that, right? It's probably just…"

###

"Pneumonia," Kenzie observed as she clasped her hands behind her neck and huffed, catching the lengths of her auburn locks left down uncharacteristically as she observed Jamie's chest films while they came up on the monitors, having been summoned from a rare outing for the singly focused physician. Everyone had been surprised when she had rushed in on Rick's arm, dressed casually in a long, flowing printed skirt and silk blouse with her favored sandals despite the frigid weather outside, the pair having finally met for that promised Thai lunch date which was unfortunately now the last thing on her mind at the moment. "There and there," she released her grip and pointed to the screen to inform Eddie, Frank and Eva who had joined her for the conference along with Dr. Jorgen, the attending doctor from the hospital. "Damn it!"

"But that's better, right?" Eddie pleaded as she clung to Kara's logic and looked for hope. Thus far she had been denied any access to Jamie in the ICU except for a quick passing glance through the glass walls of the unit on the way in here. He was sitting fairly upright, eyes closed though and under oxygen and cooling blankets with a thick pillow crammed up against his left side to cushion the excruciating painful coughing that had started. "I told you, it was my fault for taking him out! It's not his leg then!"

"Unlikely," Jorgen frowned, not appreciating in the least bit about having his hands tied over patient care in his own department with this mysterious treatment for a broken leg which in his opinion looked to be killing the man in this instance. "Systemic bacterial infection infiltrating the lung. Osteomyelitis. We need to find the abscess in his leg and drain it or you'll see I'm right at the autopsy," he threatened callously with little regard to the family members in the room.

"Dr. Jorgen!" Frank warned as his patience for the contentious man thinned with the indifference for his obviously upset and pregnant daughter-in-law present.

"The blood tests were negative for bacteria," Kenzie advised as she paged through the results on the chart the nurse just updated.

"As they often are for a bone infection!" Jorgen insisted while still offering nothing in the way of a bedside manner as his sole intent was to spar with the dissenting viewpoint. "The preferred diagnostic criterion for osteomyelitis is a positive bacterial culture from bone biopsy in the setting of bone necrosis… you haven't even permitted an MRI or CT, but those results would be skewed by all the hardware you stuck in there, anyway! He needs to go to the OR now!"

"It could be viral," Kenzie added as she searched for another page. "Where's the rapid flu test?"

"I didn't order one," Jorgen revealed. "Surgical wounds, post open fracture, fatigue, fever, chills, low urine output, altered mental status, difficulty breathing... bacterial sepsis," he insisted.

"Exposure, fatigue, fever, chills, low urine output, altered mental status, difficulty breathing from pneumonia... just as likely flu considering he's been pumped full of antibiotics for weeks and the bone graft..." she stopped herself from revealing anything about her matrix process which included embedded measures to prevent such infections. "Viral sepsis," she insisted as she pushed the chart over towards the other doctor. "Get the rapid test. We'll aspirate for the lower respiratory tract if that comes up negative."

"Commissioner, I can't in good conscience continue to treat your son in this manner!" Jorgen advised as he refused to take the file. "Dr. MacKenzie is grasping at straws to keep us from compromising her precious test subject. The longer we wait, the less likely we will be able to get ahead of this infection. It will kill him otherwise. She does not have the patient's interest at heart or admitting privileges at this hospital. I assure you those will not be extended as a courtesy once I speak to the chief!"

"Wait, what?!" Eddie cried as she had been silently watching the now-familiar type of exchange between the two antagonistic doctors like a rapid-fire tennis match while trying to absorb what they were bantering about. "Are you saying we have to move him? But he looks so sick!" her frightened eyes darted towards the door and down the hall where her husband lay. "That's not right! You can't do that!"

"I can and I will," Jorgen insisted brusquely as he tried to force the issue. "I either book the OR for the bone biopsy now so we can find out what strain of obviously resistant bacteria is causing this or transfer him elsewhere, but I'll not be party to this. The nurses will continue to provide supportive care until you decide, but I would not advise waiting. It's up to you, Mrs. Reagan. I need to go _treat_ my patients now," he added with obvious emphasis and contempt before leaving the room.

"Frank, what should we do?!" Eddie begged as she looked back and forth between him and Eva for support. "Maybe Dr. Holden can admit him here if we call her? She helped us before! What about Addison? Mom?! Tell me what I should do!"

"Eddie," Dr. Kenzie started. "I know I've asked a lot from you already, but you need to trust me on this… I am positive this is viral. If we compromise his surgical site with a biopsy, all we will do is invalidate him for the study and risk further complications that may take his leg on top of that. I'll get authorization from my director to chopper him back up to Columbia to stay…"

"No! I need to go talk to Jamie! He didn't want to be away from us and he's not just some experimental guinea pig! He's my life! I can't make a decision like this for him again!"

"If he has the flu... you're pregnant," Kenzie advised evenly as she saw the panic setting in once more. "You're risking the baby by exposing yourself any more than you have. Besides, with the fever he has right now he's not coherent… he can't make any decisions on his own."

"But we both had our shots for the flu already!" Eddie argued. "Right before he went to Washington!"

"That doesn't protect either of you against all strains and he might not have built up proper immunity considering the accident occurred only a few days later. Please, Eddie, let me evac him. He has the start of pneumonia from the exposure… this has to be turned around quickly before it gets worse. I warned you about him being out in public while his immune system is tanked and those broken ribs keep him from clearing his lungs. We have to strictly limit his visitors and can keep him much safer in a more controlled environment in my unit. This could set his recovery back weeks if not months. You can't do this at home; he's not going to have the strength to so much as lift himself out of bed, let alone start rehab for his leg…"

"So you're basically saying this is my fault for trying to show him he's still part of our lives and capable of being the husband and father he was before! He's been depressed! That's not good for his recovery either, and I'm not staying away from him no matter what you say! He needs somebody to be with him!" she cried. "He needs his family and friends around!"

"We will not have any of that, Edit!" Eva flared suddenly as she grabbed Eddie's arm and could no longer contain herself as she sought to advocate for both her daughter and son-in-law. "Jamison was clear with his grandfather while we were taking him from the house. He told him for the baby's sake he does not want you near him if he's sick!"

"But, Mom… I have too!" Eddie continued as she sank back into the guilt that Jamie had tried to drive from her just a few days earlier. "This is all my fault!"

"It is not, and I do not trust this other doctor knows what he is doing; he certainly has no regard for you," Eva revealed as she looked to Frank for confirmation, and his slight nod gave her the permission to continue. "Get Jamison back to Columbia however you must," she advised Dr. Kenzie as she spoke for her daughter and assumed the decision in case the consequences were dire, knowing that Eddie would never forgive herself if the wrong choice was made and the words had come out of her own mouth. "I will accompany him and stay until he is allowed other visitors. Janko women do not succumb to viruses!" she asserted as Frank began to offer an objection… this was his own youngest son they were talking about after all and it ruffled his feathers just a bit to have someone else take charge. "And I will not allow _anyone_ to put my unoka at risk!" she declared pointedly as the formidable specter of grandmommazilla also now rose to the forefront. "I promised to look after Jamison today, and if Edit cannot be with him, that's what I intend to do!"

* * *

 _Yup, full out 'zilla mode continues as Eva is on a real mission of her own now. Jamie may be in for quite a shock once he discovers exactly who has stayed as his side through this as he finds his life has been uprooted once more. This series of setbacks will force him to rely on his new sorted group of OC characters to support both his health and that undercover FBI investigation he found himself inadvertently dropped into._


	75. Chapter 75

Chapter 75

"Mrs. Janko, the test results came back positive for influenza A but we won't know the strain for several days," Janet Evans, Dr. Kenzie's very capable senior unit charge nurse, advised as she came into the room masked and gowned as a precaution. With no other patients in the surgical ward for the holiday week, she had been called back into service to tend the isolation area now that Jamie had returned. Commander Rigsby, who had been placed there as a precaution, had not required such constant attention before being released back to his normal room. "That type is constantly changing and is generally responsible for the large flu epidemics so it is likely to be picked up from the general public. He'll be started on anti-virals, but these symptoms typically last between three days to a week and the pneumonia must of course be treated. We've alerted Mrs. Reagan and the Commissioner, but they have not arrived yet. I believe there has been a major tie up on one of the bridges and traffic is at a standstill. This may add somewhat to his confusion," she warned before injecting the contents of the vial into the line and adjusting his IV. "But I think the majority of that is already from the height of the fever and pain medication that's been prescribed. Let me know if you notice anything untoward though," she added as the older woman had been sitting at her patient's immediate bedside for more than an hour without moving, not even glancing over as Jamie's surgical wounds had been cleaned and re-wrapped after no apparent sign of infection had been found in his leg. "Would you like a cup of tea?"

"No… um, yes, well that would be lovely," Eva acknowledged the offered kindness while she continued to watch her son-in-law worriedly as she had the whole time during his flight and re-admission here. Dr. Kenzie had waved off a few rules regarding travel and advised her staff for their own good to allow the insistent woman to remain with Jamie at all times. "These blankets covering him are quite cold," she worried. "Still his fever remains so high. It's just below 105, that's very bad, isn't it?"

"Some patients have a heightened inflammatory response throughout their body in situations like this where they are already fighting off a serious injury," the nurse informed. "That's probably why he's so tired and unresponsive, but it hasn't gone up any further since his arrival. Hopefully the treatments we started will help bring it down soon. Has he been coherent at all?"

"No," Eva replied sadly as she sat back. "A few mumbles I could not understand. I think he is likely calling for Edit or his daughter, and I am not sure but I believe he mentioned his brother Joseph. He passed a few years ago," she explained with further concern as Jamie lay still underneath a volume of cooling devices and a fogging oxygen mask as medication was delivered directly into his inflamed lungs.

"Well his vitals look pretty stable and his oxygen level is not too bad," Janet encouraged. "It's a good thing this was caught early before it spread to both sides. I'm sure we'll see some improvement in the next few hours. If you notice him coughing, try to hold this pillow up against his side, but not too hard. It will lessen the pain from those ribs," she explained. "He needs to clear the congestion, but that will be difficult at this point."

"Yes, I have done that," Eva acknowledged. "And I have tried to keep his lips moist with this sponge so they don't crack. Is there anything else I can do?"

"Talk to him, let him know you're here and you can put some of these cool cloths on his forehead, but I think you're doing a wonderful job," Janet heartened as she left the mentioned supplies. "It does make a big difference when our patients know they have loving family members at their side. He's lucky to have such a dedicated a mother-in-law. I know mine wouldn't so much as send a card. I'll be back in a few minutes with your tea," she added before stepping back out and discarding her gown.

"Indeed," Eva sighed as she pursed her lips and reached for a cloth to wring out in the provided pan of ice water. "Not long ago there would have been no one to send me a card either, Jamison," she admitted as she softly patted some beads of sweat away from his brow before placing it down. "But because of you my daughter has come back to me and brought with her so many others. I must thank you for that… I do wish that I had been kinder in the beginning, but it is not always my nature," she added, assuming that this conversation would fall on deaf ears as it were, and looking for anything to fill the empty silence in this cold, sterile place.

"M'm 'kay," came the fevered, mumbling reply which left her frowning, unsure if that was in direct response to her admission or just another random utterance.

"Jamison, can you hear me?" she asked as she reached for him. "I know this sounds foolish, but squeeze my hand," she demanded in a clichéd fashion with no immediate movement or outward sign that he was waking.

"M'm sorry, M'm," came the verbal answer instead, and it caused Eva's eyebrow to raise once more. If she didn't know better, she would have sworn he had just called her by the affectionate term of 'mom' again. This was disconcerting and unfamiliar, surely caused by his condition.

"There's nothing to be sorry for," she continued to engage anyway even as a blessed beep drew her attention up to the monitor and she noted his temperature had dropped by a slight margin, the first such hopeful sign in hours.

"M'm 'posed to care of th'm," he huffed in a clearer fashion, but the effort caused an almost immediate round of muffled coughing, grimacing and loud alarms which brought Janet back into the room in a flash with the promised beverage forgotten on the counter outside.

"Easy Sergeant Reagan..." Janet started as she adjusted the bed and tried to maneuver him into a protective position until the spell passed.

"Jamie," Eva insisted once more.

"Right, I forgot, Jamie," Janet smiled back at the demanding tone since she was used to dealing with military men and women with their desire for formality as she held him rolled up against the pillow for several minutes until the coughing stopped, although it was evident the effort had exhausted him once more once she eased him back down and he slumped against the mattress. "You're doing fine now," she assured as all the readings came back into balance. "Just try to relax if you can."

"He was speaking to me before that happened," Eva informed her. "He knew I was with him. I'm positive he did."

"That's an excellent sign," the nurse agreed as she busily checked and readjusted all the equipment. "I'm sure your daughter and his father will be pleased to hear that. I just got word they're on the way up from downstairs right now. I'll sit with him a little to monitor things. Why don't you go get washed up like I showed you for the infection protocol and you can meet them when they arrive? I left your tea on the counter out there."

"Yes, thank you," Eva nodded, surprised once more at the woman's concerned demeanor. "Edit will want to know about this, but she's not to be allowed in here with him no matter what she says. She's pregnant, and we are concerned for her and the baby."

"Of course," Janet agreed. "I remember from when he was on the surgical ward. She can see from the outside hall window though and as soon as he's able they can visit through the glass until he's past the point of being contagious," she assured.

"Mom!" Eddie exclaimed the second she cleared the elevator doors and spotted Eva outside of the main unit and down the second hall. "How is he? Is he…" she trailed off as her frightened eyes peered through the glass into the room. "What's wrong? Why is the nurse in there with him?" she cried frantically.

"It's the flu, dear, as Dr. MacKenzie stated," Eva replied as she sipped her cooling tea and tried to appear relaxed while framing her answers in the best possible light. "Janet informed me that the pneumonia was caught quite early and they are treating it. She expects he will feel better very soon now."

"I know that already, Mom!" Eddie insisted as Frank joined them at a slower pace, having tried once more without success to keep his newest daughter-in-law calmed down during the frustratingly slow trip to north Manhattan which had left her frazzled once more despite the knowledge that the correct decision had been made to keep Jamie with Dr. Kenzie versus the irritable Jorgen at St. Victor's. "And Janet?!" she railed. "Since when do you use their first names? I want to know what's happening now!"

"Edit, you must calm down, this level of stress is not good for you or the baby. She's his nurse and very kind. He had a coughing spell, but Janet assured me everything is fine at the moment and brought me this tea," Eva tried to reason as she used the familiar name once more. "They rechecked his leg once he arrived and it was fine. His fever is still quite high but it started to lower just a little before that point and he was trying to speak to me," she added, hoping that would pacify her daughter to a degree.

" _Trying?_ What do you mean trying?! He either was, or he wasn't!"

"He was speaking," Eva clarified as she glanced over and sought assistance from Frank as to what the right approach might be in this instance since obviously her daughter was on the edge. "It just wasn't very clear what he was trying to say yet."

"I have to go in there!" Eddie demanded as she tried to step around toward the sliding unit door before her mother was quick to block the path. "He needs me!"

"You will not," Eva warned as she refused to give way. "Not until at least a full day after his fever breaks. The people here are taking wonderful care of Jamison, you needn't worry about that."

"That's ridiculous! I can just put on a gown and mask like everyone else! I'm ten-times more likely to get the flu from Kaylin when she comes home from pre-school! Besides, like you said Janko women don't get viruses!"

"Eddie," Frank tried to interject in a softer tone as his daughter-in-law's had remained shrill and she looked to be headed towards another showdown with her recently reconciled mother in this stressed state. "Think of Jamie. He's already been clear with Pop that he's concerned about you being near him when he's ill. If you were to get sick and something happened to the baby, even if it were from another cause at this point… he would never forgive himself, right? Your mother has offered to stay with him to see this through and Dr. Kenzie said he would only be allowed limited outside visitors because he'll be in isolation and the results from the patients in this unit are so critical. Every additional person in and out of there puts him and the others at further risk."

"So I'm just supposed to walk out and leave him now? My mother offered to stay with him this morning before all of this happened and look how _that_ worked out! Upstairs, Mom?!" she shot back accusingly. "He had to crawl up the stairs _by himself_ after Kaylin because you left them alone! I just don't understand how you could!…" she trailed off while suddenly becoming lightheaded as the room started to spin.

"Edit!" Eva gasped as her daughter's knees buckled and she went pale as a ghost while Frank managed to catch her mid-descent. "Sit her down in a chair this instant!" she ordered as he deposited Eddie onto a seat while one of the other nurses manning the central desk came running down the hall.

"I'm fine," Eddie breathed heavily as one hand went to her belly and the other to her head as she looked up at the now three concerned faces above. "I think I just got a little dizzy."

"She's upset because her husband has fallen ill and she's fourteen weeks pregnant," Eva explained to the woman. "She hasn't eaten in hours."

"I'll get a blood pressure cart and some juice," the nurse advised as she hurried back down the hall.

"Sweetheart, now it's not good for you or the baby to work yourself into this state," Frank admonished gently. "Your mother is right… we need to take care of you too. Even if Jamie's fever were to break this minute, seeing you this way would not be good for him either. I'm going to take you home… to my house," he clarified as he caught Eva's concerned look at the thought of her daughter being left alone. "She and Kaylin will stay with us at least for the next day… the surfaces in their house will be cleared of the flu virus by tomorrow, but she will not be left alone until we know she's fine," he promised as he looked down at Eddie once more, and everyone sighed in relief after a quick check by the returning nurse indicated only a slightly elevated blood pressure which was understandable given the circumstances.

"I'm sorry I yelled at you, Mom!" Eddie cried into Eva's shoulder as she stood to leave once they were all sure she was indeed up to it and feeling better. "You were trying to help and I…"

"Now, my lány, it is nothing," Eva assured even as she was tremendously grateful herself for being forgiven. "We move forward now, everything will be fine… you'll see. Go home with his father and rest, and I will sit with Jamison, alright? I promise you I will not leave him and I will tell you whatever happens. As you said before no one is permitted to keep their private phones on this floor but there is one in the room. Call later when you are settled at home and I will tell him, or perhaps he will be awake by that point and can speak with you himself," she encouraged.

"Okay," Eddie agreed tearfully as she stood and peered into the room once more. "I love you," she mouthed through the glass as she laid her hand on it, and Janet acknowledged with a controlled smile even while she was struggling just a bit to keep up the appearance of normal for the family outside and manage things as Jamie's stats were jumping around more than she would have liked to see through another series of coughing fits which had kept her in the room. In spite of her earlier assurances, it appeared that this was going to be a long stressful night for everyone involved anyway as that phone call would come and go without any improvement in her patient's condition.

"Eva, I promise you that Pop and I will take good care of your daughter and Kaylin," Frank vowed as he could see the older woman's concern as they were about to leave.

"And I will do likewise for your son," she returned. "It seems to be what this family does."

###

"What do you mean we can't even visit him there at all now?" Danny hissed as he stood in conference with Frank in the front foyer of the family home later that evening after returning from his frustrating and fruitless stakeout while Henry had Eddie and Kaylin in the kitchen trying to entice them both into finishing their bowls of homemade chicken noodle soup he had been cooking from stock all afternoon since returning from the hospital after witnessing the first part of Jamie's plight.

"Danny, you know access is strictly limited there, but it's even more so now that he's sick," Frank reiterated for the third time as his oldest son displayed his usual reticence at accepting the facts of the matter when it was something he didn't happen to agree with. "It will improve when he's moved to the step-down unit to start rehab, but right now he is in isolation and Dr. Kenzie feels that might be up to a week out at this point given the pneumonia."

"So he's staying there with Eva of _all_ _people,_ and you're all okay with that?" Danny stressed as he ran his hand over his head and down his neck in his typical tell. "What about everything else that's going on?" he added, referring to the Templar suspicions which had left him edgy and irritable and now the thought of his kid brother being kept out of reach had just doubled that unease. "He shouldn't be alone up there."

"Of _all_ _places,_ it's safest for now especially if he stays there and does not travel back and forth to come home," Frank reminded. "Dr. Kenzie has assured that aside that nurse from Washington, there have been no new hires for the past three months and they are vetted to the hilt. No one could have known Jamie would be brought there. It's secure and gives us time to sort this out without having him in harm's way. I think it's best for everyone involved right now if today was any indication," Frank admitted with a heavy heart as the thought of his youngest son needing to be removed from the family's direct care at this time was a big pill to swallow. "Jamie can't defend himself alone and the last few weeks have been too hard on Eddie… that's only going to get worse the further along she gets. Your brother has a long road ahead of him, son. Maybe it's a good thing that he'll be able to focus on that without worrying or trying to please and take care of anyone else. He needs to take his pain medication to have any physical chance of pushing through this and getting back to full function," he added. "And he won't do that if he thinks it's interfering with his ability to think clearly around Eddie, Kaylin or the rest of us for the matter," he admonished as he caught Danny's guilty eyes.

"I know, Dad, but it doesn't feel right, you know… to leave him out of it like this again. They went after him and his family first."

"No buts; it's best for now," Frank reiterated with authority as good or bad, he was determined to insulate his fragile youngest son right now. "I spoke with your former partner today," he quickly changed the subject and Danny's eyes snapped up at that news.

"Jackie? Do you think…?"

"No, I do not," his father affirmed with a nod and a sigh as he kept his voice down. "Not anymore… and she's expressed a willingness to help us once again when we come up with a direction," he revealed as Danny stepped back and considered that. "As soon as your brother is stable, we're going to have a family meeting here with Erin and hash this out. I want everyone on the same page this time."

"Except for Jamie," Danny frowned.

"Yes," Frank agreed with a glance back to the kitchen and his already stressed daughter-in-law as he made another decision. "Except for both of them."

* * *

 _So Frank's in charge of the Templar investigation… again. I always thought it was kind of rude the way J was booted out of it on the series when he brought it to them after working on it for the whole season, but here we are again. He's got other things to worry about anyway including a mother-in-law who has the guff to stare down Commander Rigsby and throws her son-in-law for a nuclear-level loop as he comes to the same difficult realization as his father… at that moment the best thing for him and everyone else is a focused stay at Columbia._

 _Apologies once again for the slower pace of this one, but writing time this whole summer has been hard to come by with two busy teenagers to Uber around and other stuff life has thrown our way. To celebrate back to school week and the return of some peace and quiet in the house we'll do a **Bonus Day** on Thursday as Eva and Jamie have a chat and come to an understanding on a way forward._


	76. Chapter 76

Chapter 76

"No, dear, there's been no change," Eva admitted as she spoke to her daughter again later that evening while back at Jamie's bedside. "They were in recently to take another chest x-ray and reported that the pneumonia has not progressed, but his temperature is still up. He seems to be resting much easier though," she heartened even as she heard a renewed sob over the phone. "Now, Edit, I want you to get some sleep; it's late now. Go to bed and I'm sure by the time you wake in the morning there will be better news to report… Yes, I am sitting right next to him, of course. There's a very comfortable recliner right here. No, I will not leave… yes, I promise. Yes, I will call if there's anything that comes up... no matter how late or early it is, right. Good night, dear. Yes, I'll tell him. I love you too," Eva added as her fingers nervously drummed on the side table as she put the phone up, only to offer a dissatisfied frown and raised eyebrow at a passing near bald-headed man in the outside hall once more. He had been making a slow, determined circuit around the floor for the last hour while dragging a loaded IV pole at his side, but never failed to gaze pointedly into Jamie's room on his way through, and it was quite frankly unnerving her at this point.

"Are you all set for a little while?" Janet asked a few minutes later as she stepped in while making her last rounds before clocking off shift early for her at midnight. "Olivia will be the new nurse on duty shortly and she's been advised of Jamie's condition. The coughing has quieted down in the last hour it seems," she observed while taking a final satisfied glance at her resting patient and the steady numbers on the monitors. "He appears to be sleeping now."

"Yes, it looks that way," Eva agreed while hoping the new staff members coming in were as thorough and accommodating as Janet was. "I do wish that man would go back to his room though," she indicated as her nemesis continued his slow sweep by once more.

"Oh, him… that's Commander Rigsby," Janet informed with a small smile. "He's our night owl Navy SEAL and a tough man to keep down without a very big tranquilizer dart. Tends to roam a bit in the wee hours… hazard of the occupation I suppose. Don't worry though, he's completely harmless. Feel free to close the blinds if you prefer."

"Indeed," Eva sighed as she settled back in her place after the nurse left while keeping a flippant eye out for the intrusive watchman as she fully intended to stare him down on the next pass through so he would take the obvious hint and leave them alone.

"M'm cold," came a welcome sound once more that caught her attention instead as Jamie had been very quiet the past few hours since talking had seemed to trigger those coughing attacks and he had appeared to give up on the effort for quite a while. "Please take it off," he shivered with chills again as the illness continued to run its rampant course. "Hate… being… so cold," he begged coherently as his eyes opened in steady fashion for the first time since his arrival.

"Jamison," Eva breathed in relief as a glance up showed his temperature down to an even 102 which seemed to be a major breakthrough at this point. Eva shuddered to think what it might have ended up at had he not been covered in all of these cooling blankets for hours. "Thank goodness," she added with a relieved smile.

"S'cold," he insisted while trying harder to focus. "Why?..." he hesitated with a long swallow. "Where's Ed?..."

"Your father took Edit back to his home hours ago," Eva explained once more, although in all likelihood it was the tenth time she had informed him of such as she had been in a one-way conversation all evening. "You have the flu and a touch of pneumonia, Jamison. It's not safe for her to be exposed."

"She's 'kay?"

"Yes, she's fine and so is Kaylin," his mother-in-law advised as she raised a cup and straw to his mouth and he gratefully managed a sip or two down his raw and sore throat. "I promised I would look after you tonight while she rested. I'm so sorry about earlier. I had no idea you were ill when I left."

"No," he reiterated tiredly as he eased back on the bed once more and his hand came up to his still aching head… the flu, figures considering everything else he had to worry about. "S'all my fault..." he trailed off weakly, and he labored a bit once more.

"Now we will have none of that," Eva chided as she ignored that last revelation and started to pick up the phone, determined to call back and offer her daughter the good news that Jamie was awake and speaking when a series of raspy coughs caught her attention once more and she reached for the pillow instead to steady him as Janet had showed her before. Even to Eva's untrained ear she could hear that the formerly dry heaving breaths had now turned wet and more productive sounding so she reached for a tissue to put by his mouth. Her eyes widened in fear and shock though when her hand and the cloth came back tinged in bright red. "It's blood," she gasped in disbelief, completely unprepared for that, and for the first time in many hours began to panic once more. "Jamison, you're coughing up blood!" she repeated as her other hand flew to the button to summon the nurse who arrived quickly along with Dr. Kenzie, the former having returned after taking a few hours to sleep at home once Jamie had stabilized earlier.

"Hurts…" he croaked as the three women eased him back on the bed and Olivia pushed Eva back a few steps to give herself and the doctor room to work. "Chest hurts…"

"Mrs. Janko, I'd like you to go wait outside, please," Dr. Kenzie advised even as her stethoscope came down and she was listening for breath sounds. "Mild hemoptysis from inflammation is a common complication of the pneumonia," she added even as concern mounted while a blue tinge developed in his lips and it was apparent his oxygen levels were falling even before the alarm sounded. "A little blood while he is clearing his lungs is not unexpected, especially considering the medications he has been taking. Try not to worry too much. We'll take good care of him. Emma, please take her out," she advised a second nurse who had just entered, which is how Eva Janko found herself deposited once more in the outer hallway on a chair while the doctor worked on her son-in-law. Exhausted from the events of the day, she was too tired to do any more of her trademarked pacing and she sat quietly for once with her legs and arms crossed tightly after smoothing out her skirt of course. Preoccupied with overwhelming concern for Jamie and her daughter's well-being, and wondering how she was going to explain this to the rest of the Reagan family when offered the chance to use the phone again, she did not notice when she was joined by a former unwelcome presence, even as a few foreign tears washed down her face.

"Is he a quitter, ma'am?" the deep voice inquired as she looked up with a start to meet the gaze of the most intense set of green eyes she could ever remember seeing attached to that Commander Rigsby person who stood tall before her once more in a set of trimmed dark blue emblemed pajamas that remained unwrinkled somehow in spite of the fact his left arm was completely strapped down and immobilized against them, certainly a departure from the normal hospital gowns offered most patients. "Your son I mean," he added with a nod towards Jamie's bed. "Because you don't strike me as a weeper, and it seems like you're worried about him."

"He is not! Jamison is a fighter!" she snapped back in sudden urge to defend him as one of her own and reassure herself, unaware that Jamie was already well acquainted with this particular man who knew his history. "He's a decorated police officer! He's brave and has come back from worse than this!" she bristled at this intrusion into their privacy and the insinuations from this strange man that had been walking the halls alone for the last hours late into the night.

"Good to know, ma'am," Rigs replied with a small thin smile at this feisty woman who herself showed no fear and he was sure had the ability to back down half a platoon with another look like she had just offered him. Luckily for her he also wasn't scared off too easily. "You should try to remember that then," he added knowingly before shuffling off on his rounds once more, dragging his IV pole along while he checked on his men as they lay sleeping and recovering from various injuries and ailments along the ward. Hell, except for Quincy, none of them had ever been one of his men before, but that did not matter since the urge to stand watch at night had never subsided even when his years of service in the field had drawn to a close and he had found himself reluctantly relegated to the ranks of an instructor.

"Mrs. Janko," the doctor's voice snapped her out of her introspection as her stunned eyes had followed the Commander through the glass doors and down the opposite hall, watching as he had finally turned off to retreat into what she assumed as his own room down at the far end of one of the other wings. "He's doing much better now. As I said before, it's not unexpected to see a little blood in the sputum, but I'm sure that was upsetting for you. I've increased his pain medication again. I feel that he's been taking shallow, guarded breaths with the broken ribs which have now been further irritated by the coughing, and that's why his oxygen stats were low. He'll likely be completely out for the rest of the night. You should try to get some rest yourself in the lounge over there. Emma will remain in the room for the next few hours to monitor things."

"But I promised Edit I would not leave him," Eva fretted nervously. "What will I tell her?"

"Doctor's orders," Kenzie smiled. "Even superman's mom needs her rest too."

###

The softest early morning light was filtering in the window next to Eva's reclining chair before her eyes reopened with a start and she quickly jumped up and saw that it was already well after six-thirty, noticing that someone had considerately covered her with a soft throw blanket at some point during the night. Her first thoughts were for her son-in-law and she hurried back over to Jamie's room without even bothering to fish around on the floor for her missing heels. The blinds were frustratingly drawn across the glass in the front for privacy and she worried as she rushed through the prescribed gown and gloving routine before bursting into the room and gasping at the sight: Jamie was sitting up with a virtually untouched meager assortment of light breakfast fare on the tray in front of him, reduced to a nasal cannula on his face, with just a hint of that reassuring trademarked sideways grin behind it.

"Morning," he rasped, a bit amused at the vision of his mother-in-law looking more disheveled than he had ever seen her before.

"Jamison! You're up and eating?" she replied in shock at this sudden turnaround; a quick glance up at the monitor showing his fever had been further reduced to a more manageable 100.4 and all but one of the cooling blankets had been removed from over his legs.

"Drinking a little at least," he admitted hoarsely as he pushed the tray away. "Still feel pretty much like crap, but managed some tea anyway... Thank you, Eva," he added softly after a long pause and she could tell from his eyes than he meant so much more than for the little greeting chitchat. "The nurses said you stayed with me through some pretty rough stuff."

"Well," she chided in a more typical Janko huff and a frown. "Someone had to, and I must say it's about time you were awake. I was afraid you would be content to lie around in a rather unconscious heap again all day, Jamison… and considering what we've been through… since you preferred to call me it several times before…" she waffled before crossing an uncomfortable zone in familiarity and making up her mind to go forward. "It can be Mom or Anya from now on if you wish."

Jamie blinked back in more than a bit of shock of his own at that mention, wondering just how far gone he must have been for _that_ to have occurred and what other boundaries might have been crossed along with it. "Oh," he stuttered and raised his eyebrows questioningly to see if she was serious or he was still hallucinating before offering another reserved smirk. "Anya," he nodded as he chose what felt like the more fitting Hungarian term instead. "I would like that."

"Very well, Jamison," she smiled back, unwilling to return the favor without a direct invitation which he declined as he had become accustomed to her formality and it felt right considering how she referred to her own daughter. "Have you spoken to Edit? She will be so relieved."

"Not yet," he admitted tiredly as his eyes dropped and he shifted uncomfortably in the bed as despite the pain medication he'd received, a day's worth of inactivity had the dull ache in his hip and back coming to the forefront once more. "Didn't want to... you know, wake her this early… I've put them through too much already."

"Nonsense," Eva frowned once more as she made her way over to the bed and reached for the phone before quickly dialing her daughter's number. It just barely rang once before she heard Eddie's frantic voice once more.

"Mom! What's going on?! How is…?"

"I think maybe you would prefer to speak to Jamison and hear that for yourself," Eva cut in as she pushed the speaker button since Jamie still looked a bit tired and unable to hold and maneuver the receiver around the tangle of oxygen tubing off to that side.

"Hey, Ed," he answered simply after clearing his sore throat. "Miss you, lambchop."

"Jamie! Oh thank God!" Eddie cried. "Baby, it's so good to hear you… Are you okay?" she sniffled. "You got so sick! I didn't know what else to do… Dr. Kenzie said you came down with the flu and it turned into pneumonia so she needed to fly you back up there, and this other doctor at St. Vic's wanted to operate on your leg instead. I'm so sorry, it was all my fault for taking you out the other night… all those kids… they just love you so much we couldn't keep them away…"

"It's s'okay, Ed… don't… honey, please just stop. Don't get upset again," he begged hoarsely as he struggled to speak at any volume and laid his head back down on the pillow. "It's not your fault… none of it is. M'm fine… just still really tired..." he trailed off.

"I'll do better when you come back home, I promise!" Eddie swore in that overcompensating tone once more. "We'll be more careful with Kaylin and make sure you aren't left alone like that again!"

"Ed…" he sighed as he didn't have the fight left in him to get into that now. Given the absolute fear that had coursed through his heart during those minutes when he had struggled to get up the stairs and was unable to get to his injured daughter coupled with seeing how his injuries had affected her, he had promised himself that would not go home again until doing so would not put his pregnant wife or child at risk. "Honey, I love you and we'll figure this out. Please tell Kaylin that her daddy's gonna be alright and try not to worry so much, okay? We'll talk more a little later," he croaked out as his remaining voice was fading fast and he was finding it hard to project enough to be heard. "M'm throat hurts and m'm gonna go back to sleep for a while," he added and closed his eyes.

"Jamie? Are you still there? Mom?"

"He's just tired and resting again, dear," Eva answered worriedly and picked up the phone once more. "His fever is down quite a bit but he's still ill," she added in a hushed tone. "Dr. MacKenzie was firm about the fact that he was to stay here for a while now."

"Okay, but as soon as he's done being sick, he can come home on the weekends like we planned!" Eddie insisted. "We'll take him back for his rehab during the week when he's ready, but Kaylin and I need him here! We just have to be more careful!"

"Edit, we will talk when I get home," Eva advised. "I will sit with him this morning until I'm sure he's well enough and the next shift is caring for him, then I will be home after lunch to get freshened up. Frank left the name of a service I can call for a ride…"

"Don't be silly, Mom," Eddie objected. "I'm coming up there right now as soon as I change."

"You have work this morning, no?" Eva asked as she could see Jamie shaking his head even as he was feigning sleep as no doubt her daughter's impatient tone was coming through loud and clear. "They will not allow you in the room and Jamison needs his rest. It is foolish to call in sick and drive all that way for nothing when you can speak to him on the phone again when he is up for more conversation. I'll return this evening to check in on him, and maybe you can come then too, but we will discuss that later," she ended in a firm resolve. "If anything changes I will call, but for now, this is what we will do. I love you my lány… yes, I will," she added before hanging up.

"M'm sorry," Jamie murmured with guilt for blowing off his concerned wife in front of her own mother like that in what little whisper was left in his voice as he glanced over. "It's just…"

"Too much. I understand," Eva agreed as she put the phone away and sat down next to the bed once more to have a much-needed heart-to-heart. "And as she told me to say, she loves you with all she has, Jamison. I believe that is true both ways, but it is clear now that the way the two of you are handling this is not good for anyone involved at this point, is it?" she asked pointedly with a sigh as he sadly shook his head no in agreement. "Alright, then we must all work to change it for the better. What is it that you want for her?" she asked as he looked up at her in surprise at her candor.

"She needs to focus on herself, Kaylin and the baby… not me so much," he insisted as his eyes teared up and he tried to push himself weakly up on the bed. "I can't do anything for her… can't take care of any of them right now. Look what happened when I tried."

"Well that is also nonsense, and you are well aware of that, Jamison Reagan," Eva chided with vigor as despite wanting to help she was not about to let him sink into a self-denigrating pity party. "All she wishes for is the love you have for her and for you to be well again, but trying to hide what this has done to you while you are at home is not working either," she frowned. "I think you are not correct… the problem is you must focus on yourself without interference and not the other way. Dr. MacKenzie is of the strong opinion you would do much better staying here for your rehabilitation instead of coming back and forth from home. You must take the medication she prescribes to be able to function right now."

"But it messes me up," he protested. "I can't think straight and I forget things. The only reason I can talk to you now and make any sense is that stuff is wearing off," he added with an uncomfortable grimace as he had once again refused to have anything to do with the self-administered narcotics pump that had been set up alongside his IV line.

"Indeed," Eva agreed. "But hiding your discomfort by trying to push through without as you have been and not being able to will keep you in that bed," she added bluntly. "Or on crutches and in a wheelchair the rest of your life, and that will not be of help to anyone will it?"

"No... but Ed's not gonna agree," he started as he brought his right arm up and crossed it over his face before pushing the back of his wrist across the bridge of his nose and into his eyes hard enough to see stars… anything to force himself to focus. His mother-in-law was cutting right to the chase in her normal no-holds-bar fashion, and this time he knew she was right although it didn't make it any easier.

"Then we must both make her see that," Eva replied before adding what she knew would be a fact that would have Jamie following things her way with no further indecision. "Yesterday when you were taken to that other hospital… we had trouble reaching Edit," she revealed as he moved his arm and peeled one eye at her, wondering where this was leading as he certainly had no clear memory of anything that had happened the day before past the point of hitting the button for 911 and crawling up those stairs. "She was in a meeting in the detective bureau. The one in charge offered her a position there to do research while she is confined to such work because of her condition. She was quite excited according to Kara."

"That's her dream… to be a detective," he sighed with added regret as he pictured Eddie's bright smile at being told of that opportunity, only to have it shattered minutes later with news of his latest issues. He knew for sure now what Eva was angling at. "She can't mess that up, can she? Not with our last name… she won't get too many chances like that and if she's trying to drag me around and babysit all the time..."

"Jamison, that's not how she sees it, but yes," Eva agreed. "I assume missing shifts and taking too many more days off will compromise her chances of a promotion once she has the baby, and even with others and myself offering to help… I'm afraid after all this I will not have her trust again. She will insist on doing things herself."

There was an agonizingly long pause before he responded as something needed to finally click all the way over within him. What had been done was over now, and for his family's sake he could no longer afford to waste time looking backwards and dwelling on it with regrets. "Okay, you're right... I'll talk to her about staying and everything else… um, later," he nodded as the sad resolution swept over him and he needed to take a little time to process it… Eddie's opportunities, Kaylin's reaction after what she had previously been through with Jayne, the stress and strain on the new baby not even bigger than a little piece of fruit yet… all made worse by his presence in the home right now. It was obvious they were better off without him for the time being, and he had a mission to address here. The faster he could do that and press himself through rehab to regain what little if anything he could, the better things would be for everyone so they could finally move on one way or another.

"Jamison, I think that it will not be for long... remember you are improving every day."

"No, I understand… I can't let her mess things up, and I've already tanked my own career," he added as he looked down in utter exhaustion once more, heartbroken at the thought of pushing himself away from his beloved little family even though it did appear to be in everyone's best interest at the moment since he seemed to be doing more harm than good there, anyway. "M'm gonna sleep now, Anya," he stated as he gave into that notion and reached down to push the button to deliver the maximum mind-dulling dose of painkillers the PCA system allowed and it was just seconds before that blessed numbing white cloud descended and pushed away any other thoughts as his eyes closed once more.

"Jamison, you've done no such a thing! There are other opportunities for you!" Eva cried at what seemed like his sudden unexpected admit of defeat and action which had not been her intention at all. "Your father said at Thanksgiving that his deputy chief in the legal department offered you a position there! You are a gifted lawyer! I'm sure you can still take advantage of that!" she tried to assure while he drifted away. "And I told that man outside you were not a quitter last night!"

* * *

 _Well, to everyone on the other side of this, it looks like a good dose of that depression may be hitting Jamie again, and maybe a little of it is, but thanks to Eva he's made up his mind now to put himself in charge once more going forward to make things better and have no fear, Commander Rigsby and Quincy will have a say and set him straight shortly with some more of their rules. Next though is a big showdown at that family meeting where Erin and her "I told you so's," will infuriate an already touchy mommazilla and perhaps set off another character who has been dealing with her own sense of loss lately while Eddie initially feels ambushed before she is finally ready to flip her own switch to the good as our Jamko pair begins to put themselves back together._


	77. Chapter 77

Chapter 77

"WAIT! WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE DOESN'T WANT TO COME HOME NOW!" Eddie cried in protest as she found herself sitting at an impromptu meeting at the dining room table in the Reagan family home along with the rest of the adults and Eva while Sean and Jack entertained Kaylin upstairs behind closed doors and Nicki was still conveniently sequestered on campus. "WHAT DID YOU SAY TO HIM, MOM?!" she continued to demand in accusing fashion with only a flashing glance at her sister-in-law as Erin had been the last to arrive just minutes ago and the perceived smug look on her face she failed to hide while taking her seat was infuriating. Despite that open invitation to a confrontation, Eddie instead turned the immediate wave of anger towards her own mother who had ambushed her with this pre-arranged short trip down the street after work for what was shaping up to be an intervention when she had been planning on making the longer drive up to Columbia to see her husband. "He's sick! He doesn't know what he's talking about! You said it yourself!"

"Edit," Eva sighed. "I do not wish for either of you to be upset like this. He has concerns that are difficult to speak of. I was just trying to help him see…"

"What? That he's better off without me?! Without us?!" Eddie railed against that notion.

"No! Only that he must also consider himself too… not just others," her mother tried to explain while raising an insolent, daring eyebrow at Erin who suddenly shifted uncomfortably in her seat under that direct mommazilla stare. Clearly the older Janko woman was still on her daughter's side in this matter and was in no way admitting that her viewpoint mirrored that of Jamie's sister in the slightest. "That if he does not, it will keep him where he is and affect all of you."

"Oh, _now_ you think you know what's best for me after all of these years? What's best for _my_ husband? You had no right to do that either, Mom!"

"Sweetheart, this is Jamie's decision, not your mother's or anyone else's. Eva came to see me at the office this afternoon out of concern for that when she left the hospital and I went up there immediately and spoke to him myself," Frank interrupted as he sought to keep his voice reassuring in tone although the subject was touchy and he knew would spark loud debate given the looks of dissent present on the rest of the family's faces. "His temperature was nearly down to normal by that point and he was thinking clearly, but right now he is too weak to consider leaving anytime soon, and Dr. Kenzie is adamant he not have another setback like this. He has other reasons, not the least of which is his concern for the strain this has put on you and his daughter," he paused for a moment to let that sink in and reflected on the rest of that difficult conversation which had seen his son offering the Police Commissioner a verbal resignation to his post in the NYPD with a request to keep that private for now until he could manage the courage to bring it up to his own wife that evening.

"I think after what happened with Kaylin, her reaction to all this and the fall upstairs… this sudden illness… I know it sounds counterproductive and hard to fathom right now, but it woke him up and he's really turned a corner here," he added with a lump growing in his throat at the thought of all that Jamie was still facing and the added guilt over the fact that his son had also made it abundantly clear that he didn't want or expect any career help from his own father.

 _What child should have to do that?_ Frank wondered… just assume that the trappings of an office and a staunch ethical stance would rank above and prohibit a parent from offering whatever was needed in this instance… but then again that's exactly the view he held when it came to Eddie wasn't it? He had been angry after learning about Henry's interference at the 12th and it was hard in this instance to know which side of the fence was the right one. As his own father had vehemently highlighted when he returned home, all these years of putting the job before his family… particularly in front of his youngest like a brick wall with no windows or doors in place was coming back to haunt them now.

"He knows he has to focus now and listen to the doctor. There was a determination in his voice to move forward and handle this that I have not heard before," Frank continued anyway as he swallowed that back. "He's made some decisions, says he has a plan and wants to be in a better place… more in control and independent before he attempts it again, and I think we all need to support that."

"More independent?" Eddie repeated with the slow realization that all of her efforts to make him feel just that way had obviously failed miserably. "But I thought… I mean that's what I was trying to do with everything… and he couldn't talk to me about it?" she added hurtfully.

"I'm sure _he_ has talked to you about it… it's just that _you're_ not willing to listen," Erin snapped in finally after making little attempt to hold that back, drawing a heavy, deeply inhaling frown from her father who had warned her thoroughly upfront not to instigate or place blame during this discussion after he had waffled over whether to include his still self-righteous daughter or not… finally settling on having the whole family present through to clear the air no matter how ugly it got in an effort to resolve some of these differences if possible. "If not Jamie… you should have at least listened to the doctor and this wouldn't have happened at all! He wouldn't have had to go through that alone!"

"Erin, that's not fair!" Linda picked this time to enter the fray while she sat next to Danny who was currently simmering silently on a slow boil and more interested in the evening's planned second act regarding the Templar suspicions once the others including Eddie and Eva had departed. His wife had agreed against her better judgement to be present for this initial discussion if nothing more than to play advocate for her Reagan family outsider soul sister… in reality she just plain felt sorry for what Eddie was about to come up against after having witnessed the aftermath of Erin's actions last time. "She was doing what she thought best!"

"Best?! For who? Not for Jamie! He was sick, and she left him home alone to go play detective!"

"She did _not_ do that," Frank admonished strongly as he tried to assuage that guilt for both Eva and his newest daughter-in-law. "She left him in good, capable hands with her mother to go work the normal desk shift at her precinct, and he assured Eva that he was fine before she stepped out for what was supposed to be a few minutes. What happened was unfortunate, but could not be foreseen."

"Wait, aren't you the one who said that there's very little that happens in a day that can't be anticipated?" Henry himself couldn't help but offer a biting snipe against his son from the opposite side of the table considering the way he had been dressed down earlier while the two contested their own private, hot debate over the fact that Bear had been allowed to escape the house to light the fuse on this disaster initially as well as the virtue of that little private hook that had been pulled to get Eddie up in the detective squad in the first place… something that Jamie himself nor either of his brothers had never benefited from, which had been pointed out as father and son had taken opposing sides over the matter. "Humph, seems like you were wrong about that too."

"Well, then she didn't have to take him out to that stupid soccer practice to make him sick in the first place!" Erin continued to rant with a singular focus. "She was definitely warned not to do anything like that and don't tell me now it wasn't a good idea to have that POA done! Look at what happened! He had an emergency and Eddie was nowhere to be found! If Dad hadn't been there, then…"

"Then I would have been!" Linda continued her staunch defense as a rush of unrelated emotions were finally breaking and coming out in force as her eyes filled. Suddenly this wasn't just about what had happened to Jamie, but rather an attack on a personal, family decision made by one of those Reagan outsiders, of which there were now exactly three at the table who were fast becoming a united front. "Or Eva, or Henry or Danny… just like before. One of us would have taken care of it! You're not the only one that loves Jamie in this family or is worried about him, Erin, but you're making it sound like Eddie knew he was sick and just patted him on the head, left a bowl of water out and locked the door behind her for the day because she had something better to do!" she bristled. "She thought everything was fine and got called into a meeting for crying out loud! An opportunity she's been working really hard for… one that _he_ wants for her and something she's been dreaming about…"

"And he's my little brother! I watched him grow up and dream about things he wanted too! He could have been a great lawyer then he decided to throw that away to be a cop, and now he can't do that either! But we're not allowed to talk about that or God-forbid help him do something else, and besides everyone else in this room could tell that it was too soon for him to come home except for her! Excuse me for being worried about him!"

"Well, I saw Jamie yesterday morning, and he _was_ making some real progress this week at home," Linda continued to insist with vigor as she took the lead in Eddie's defense much to her husband's surprise. "More than what he did at the hospital. He was caring for himself and even started to get some feeling back in his lower leg," she added as Eddie's eyes snapped over at that news. "I knew he was tired before Renzulli came to visit, but I checked and there was no fever or anything to indicate something was worse off. Eddie couldn't have known that he was getting sick when she left for work if I didn't… he just said he hadn't slept well."

"So everyone thinks I'm wrong? He was tired because all of this was too much, too soon and he's afraid to take his meds at home. You should have known he would push himself too hard and saw this coming. Neither of you will _ever_ understand him like I do!…" Erin trailed off in frustration as the Reagan men ringing the table kept their stunned silence for the time being, honestly appalled at the amount of venom being swapped back and forth by the women in front of them, and Frank was quickly starting to regret his decision to allow all of this to come to a head as he could see his family splintering apart in front of his very eyes.

"Erin Reagan! That is false, and you will not speak to my daughter that way again!" Eva fired back finally as her dander had been raised to the hilt and her momma claws were fully unfurled. "Even in this short time I have seen that she loves him with all she has and could as easily say that you are on the outside of their marriage and do not know what they are facing together! This is her husband you are speaking of! The one she is willing to give up whatever is needed for… her career now, her very life before when they were partners. I am sorry for you that you have not known that type of love in your own life, although in honesty neither have I… perhaps someday," she declared with a look of pity directed at Erin and began to stand up to leave even as Eddie remained locked on that one massive understated revelation Linda had made that instantly changed her focus on everything. "It is you who will never understand your brother that way. Edit, we will not sit here and listen to this any longer; I'm taking you home. Jamison assured me he would call and speak to you tonight as soon as he was up to it once more. His fever has broken, and tomorrow you will see him when he is moved into a regular room so it will be much better. Together you will move forward."

"Wait, Mom, stop! He did? Linda… he felt something? Really?" Eddie begged in a small voice that instantly cut through the louder ones that meant nothing to her anymore, looking for a reason to hope… a tiny light finally peeking through from the end of this very long, dark tunnel that affirmed the right decisions had been made.

"He did, Eddie… he could only sense some pressure on his ankle from the brace pinching. He said he felt that and had pins and needles up higher though. There's no movement in his foot yet, but…"

"It's a start, right? Please tell me it's a start?"

"Yes, I think it is," Linda replied with a small smile as she offered that flicker of hope everyone had been looking for even after this latest setback. "I thought you knew about it already. Aaron wasn't there so we couldn't ask him yet, but Jamie…. Frank is right… he's ready to turn a corner physically and mentally. Talk to Dr. Kenzie; I'm sure it has to be a good sign especially so soon after the surgery. Once he sees more results from the rehab… this is going to get better."

"So, like I said a hundred times now... he's right where he belongs then," Erin continued after that brief interlude, still intent on being right and bolstering her 'I told you so' case. "At Columbia he's safe and the experts can help him."

"Well, right now, Erin Reagan, I couldn't care less about what you think," Eddie admitted softly as she ended the contentious debate while everyone else looked up in surprise at that now calm, evenly stated admission before she got up to join her mother to take their leave. "C'mon Mom, let's go. If that's Jamie's decision… then I need to hear it for myself and let him know I'll support it."

###

"So… Eddie really sorta did a one-eighty there tonight," Danny very carefully broached the subject of the meeting with some reserve as he eased into bed next to Linda's side after returning home later that night. The evening had proven to be full of surprising revelations which had continued for Erin even after Eddie and her mother had excused themselves from the house with Kaylin and Linda and the boys had followed suit and returned to Staten Island alone while her husband and the core of the Reagan family, minus Jamie, discussed the apparent resurrected threat against them. Once the shock had worn off and plans were made, it was agreed also to keep the rest of Danny's family and Nicki in the dark as well unless there was a need to make it known.

"Seems like you were really on her side," he continued when his first attempt did not result in any further immediate conversation.

"She hasn't done anything wrong," Linda continued to gripe as she remained unaware of Malevsky's added menace to her own husband.

"Still, between you, Eddie and Eva… Erin should probably think twice about walking down any dark alleys alone anytime soon."

"Your sister needs to get off her high horse for once. She needs to accept that she's got no business going behind their backs telling them what to do anymore. I'm sick of her judging us like we're second-class citizens because we married into the family. Eddie loves Jamie and just needed a reason to see there's hope they can get beyond this," Linda admitted softly while still refusing to look up from the book she was pretending to read. "She's doing her best, and it's been really hard on her… maybe more than for him. She's got so much to deal with between the accident, her mother, that jerk at work and the baby's issues besides being up and down while being pregnant too… the hormones sometimes make you…"

"Crazy?" Danny flinched after he said that word given their own situation, but he had some concerns over his wife's own somewhat over-the-top reaction that evening.

"Emotional," she insisted with a vapid eye as she considered things and he turned over on the pillow to stare at the ceiling while weighing the wisdom of injecting anything more into the mix. Still there was that Marcus wrinkle that had been nagging at his gut for the last day. A blood promise had been made in the dirt halfway across the world nearly a decade and a half ago to a dying brother… a vow to watch out over another family. Surely that extended beyond to even the next generation and another son who might forever regret walking away from this responsibility.

"That I can certainly understand," she added sadly and that comment made up his mind… maybe his wife needed a reason to move beyond this too.

"Linda, I know you can relate to some of what Eddie's been through… and it's twice as hard because we've kept what really happened to ourselves, but where do you see us going from here?" Danny asked softly as he decided to press ahead carefully and see where it led. "I'm worried about you. I can't stand to see you hurting this way either. Dad said… well he said that when he and Mom went through it… that a man can't understand. I know I don't, but I want to help though."

"There's no place to go, is there?" she admitted in a defeated tone. "We don't have the money to do anything else, and I obviously can't try again. Admit it, Danny… you were always against it, anyway."

"I was… not... totally... for it; I won't lie," he confessed slowly. "But seeing what this has done to you, if I could change what happened… I'd do it in a heartbeat, Lin."

"That's easy to say now."

"It's not!" he insisted. "You know how hard it is for me to admit I was wrong… well I was. I was wrong to put my feelings above yours. But Linda, what if there was a way? Maybe not a traditional one that we considered before though?"

"What? Like you going out to a cop bar and knocking up some two-bit badge hussy so we can raise your love child?" she sniped at that implausible scenario with irritation evident and he stiffened at how close she had come to hitting the center of the bullseye right off the bat.

"Um… well, Jesus, how do you do that?!" he gasped in nervous amazement at her razor-sharp womanly intuition which was more in tune than any first-grade detective's gut and had proven to be his downfall many times over the years. "You always know…"

"DANIEL FITZGERALD REAGAN! How could you even think…!"

"NO! NOT ME!" he insisted as he sat up and tried to quell her errant suspicions. "LINDA! I would never!"

"Then what? What's this all about then, Danny?" she replied back with an overwhelming sense of exhaustion with this topic apparent now.

"I ran into Marcus at the 12th yesterday," he started to explain while noting the deep deflating sigh she emitted at the mention of his oft-times aggravating and immature pseudo-nephew. "He met this girl a few months ago at O'Malley's, and…"

"Oh, God. Danny, you can't be telling me…"

"She is. They're not together or anything, and she wants to give it up after it's born in June. She's accepted to the next academy class. If it's his… well, he doesn't think he can handle it alone."

"IF?! IF IT'S HIS?! DANNY, SERIOUSLY?! Where are you going with this?" Linda demanded as she sat up straighter and let that sink in while her eyes bored through his now guilt-ridden expression. "Marcus screws up… _literally_ screws up _,_ and you want _us_ to clean up _his_ mess? IF IT'S HIS MESS?!" she asked incredulously after a long pause as her eyes reflected back in shock. "We're supposed to open ourselves up and wait to figure that out?"

"No, but I promised Jimmy, Lin! I promised him I would look after his family. He saved my life; I owe him that and more! His wife can't do it now after going through the cancer surgery last year. I know I didn't do a great job all these years, and that Marcus is irresponsible and hot-headed. He's a lot like me before I met you," Danny cajoled with a small, encouraging smile as he tried to appeal to her sense of nostalgia because it was fast becoming evident by the look on his wife's face that bringing this up now had been a mistake. "I tried to have Jamie help him, and he did even if of all people on earth he didn't have the patience to see it through all the way. But I have a chance here to make that right… _we_ have a chance to get what you wanted, right? A baby… I know you'd rather it was one of our own, but this… maybe it's God's way of opening another door? Don't you always come back to that when something bad happens to us? We can have that, and Marcus can have a chance to stay involved… to man up and be part of the kid's life. I can show him how to be a dad," Danny insisted. "He wanted to do it, I know he did… he was asking Eddie what the department could do for him if he took the baby on his own so he can help with the money part of it too. I'll make him see that he needs to be responsible and put away something every week."

"So we'd be what? Foster parents? Grandparents?! We… no make that _I_ do all the dirty work because we all know you can't change a diaper to save your life, Daniel Reagan, and Marcus gets to come in and play daddy when he feels like it? That's making him responsible? After what we've just been through, putting us into the middle of something like that... that's your solution to _our_ problem? I JUST HAD A MISCARRIAGE! OUR BABY DIED!" she cried as her volume escalated and Danny was uncomfortably aware that their little secret probably wasn't anymore given the proximity of Jack and Sean's bedrooms and he cursed the fact that he had brought this up at all with them in the house. "Do you even care? When _I_ wanted another baby, you weren't that interested… you were relieved that Dr. Jacobs said getting pregnant was a bad idea, but now that it comes from Marcus you're happy for it? It's our big chance?"

"No, God! I'm sorry, Lin! This didn't come out the right way! I thought maybe it might help… I didn't want to upset you again!" Danny backtracked as he watched his wife crumble while the tears started to fall before she got up and started to pace next to the bed, suddenly feeling suffocated and starved for air as all of her fresh grief came crashing back down again. "I just wanted to see how you felt about it!"

"HOW DO I FEEL?! How do I feel about the fact that two stupid kids can mess up after getting drunk at a bar one night and have something that I wanted so badly, then give it away because it's inconvenient? IT'S NOT FAIR! THAT'S HOW I FEEL ABOUT IT!" she shouted back before making up her overwhelmed mind to flee as a bag came out of the closet and she began shoving some clothing and necessities into it.

"Lin! Linda! Wait! Where are you going? Oh, c'mon," Danny begged as he got up and grabbed her arm. "Please, honey, I don't want you to leave! I didn't know you'd react this way! I said I'm sorry that I messed up! Dad's right! A man can't understand, but I was trying to! I really was! I wanted to help, not make you upset!"

"I can't Danny! I can't be here right now. Maybe I need someone who does understand! Who gets what it feels like to hurt like that… to be told news about your child or your husband or your life that cuts you to your core while you're crazy and hormonal and all the people around you think they know better!"

Those were the last words Danny Reagan heard from his wife that night before watching out of the front window with a renewed heavy heart as the headlights from her car flashed while she backed out of the driveway and headed east once more on a direct path towards a home on Driftwood Way in Bay Ridge where another set of Reagan family outsiders was staying. He ran his hand over his head in a patented stress tell before swallowing with a heavy grimace and rolling his eyes towards heaven when he heard the questions he dreaded voiced behind him as Jack and Sean stood at the top of the steps, having listened to far too much to ignore now.

"Dad? What's going on? Why did Mom leave? And what baby was she talking about?"

* * *

 _So, poor Danny has some 'splaining to do there, and that whole chapter actually worked out a lot differently than I had originally intended in my outline as I had Eva taking a more active role in Eddie's defense against Erin (who will come around when the time is right, trust me I know I've been tough on her character in this installment), but it was Linda's voice I heard instead when I started typing. Seems like someone else besides just Jamie has finally turned the corner here as hearing there's been improvement has finally snapped Eddie out of her back and forth panicked state like a bucket of ice water and she'll be a lot more collected and resolved going forward. Next, another long chapter as Eva continues her mothering ways while yet another Reagan (outsider) shows up at the doorstep in need of some tea and a good talk while Eddie and Jamie share one of their treasured midnight chitchats long distance as they agree on a plan to start putting everything back together again._


	78. Chapter 78

_Just wanted to send a shout out to everyone who's been impacted by the recent hurricanes and fires. I'm lucky to be living in the Northeast which has been spared from that, but have friends and family in the south and west who have not been so fortunate. Thinking of all of you who are facing that too, and hoping things will get better soon._

* * *

Chapter 78

"Ed, God, honey, m'm sorry it's so late. I know you talked to Dad and everybody else already tonight and you're upset..." came the assuming, nervous, hesitant admission when she picked up the expected call from her husband on her cell late that night. "I shouldn't have agreed to let him to do that; I don't know what I was thinking…"

"Jamie, relax… I'm not upset; it's fine…" she tried to reassure with a calm voice and nod to her mother promising herself she would once again keep the rift with Erin hidden before hurrying upstairs to the bedroom so they could speak in private after she slipped out from underneath the Harvard fleece throw on the couch in the living room. The two Janko women had been sharing some decaf tea and talking about the events of the evening after putting Kaylin to bed with Bear on his reappointed watch while now waiting for Linda's somewhat puzzling late night return.

"I swear I meant to call earlier so we could talk first, but I was tired and…"

"And you needed to sleep and take your meds. You're sick; it's okay, lambchop. I talked to the nurse around seven and she told me that you were just resting; that your fever's been down all afternoon, and the pneumonia was already looking much better. You'll probably get moved into a regular room in the next day or two at the latest so I can come see you then," Eddie added with pre-practiced confidence before bunching up some pillows and crawling under the covers of their bed to snuggle in. Even if her husband wasn't present in the room, it was reassuring and familiar to have their late-night chat in this manner. "I knew you would call when you could. I wasn't worried."

"Yeah? And you're not mad?" he questioned, frankly shocked at the even, sincere tone of her voice since he had prepared himself for another emotional standoff. "I mean about that and me..."

"About you deciding to stay there for now?" Eddie finished for him with a deep sigh. "Jamie, I miss you so much when you're not here in bed here next to me, but no, I'm not mad. I am really concerned that you've been so depressed, but I want us to start being honest with each other right now because all of this tap dancing around what's really going on with everything so we don't hurt each other's feelings has gotta stop."

"Eddie…"

"I'll start," she insisted and stayed true to her path with every intention to do that for the most part. "Jamie, before this we could talk to each other about almost anything, and you know that's true. We need to get back to that… back to _us,"_ she insisted before he could get a word in edgewise. "With all that's happened, I know I acted crazy. I felt really guilty because I sent you down to Washington anyway when you didn't want to go and we were both distracted thinking about the baby. I thought that everything was my fault and guess it just really scared me to have you away. I _was_ upset tonight at first, I won't lie anymore, but it was mostly at Mom because I thought she said something to make you think we were better off without you here at home… it's still hard for me to trust her sometimes, but we talked and I know she's right now. I said I was sorry for acting out like that. As soon as Linda told me about your leg… about how you were starting to get some sensation back… it made me feel so much better. Like the choice I made that first awful, terrible night to have Dr. Kenzie put you in her study was the right one," she sniffed and felt a large cloud of anxiety lift from her heart after that rambling confession.

"Honey, it was..." he tried but failed to interrupt her run. "I know you did what was best for me. Please don't ever doubt that."

"Well, I was really worried I was putting you through all this because I was selfish, and just admitting it out loud to you helps. When your Dad said you wanted to be more independent before you came back... baby, that's all I want for you. I love you so much. How could I be mad if you honestly think staying at Columbia is what's best right now? If it is, I'll support it… we just need to talk about things like this first. Your turn," she urged before adding a reminder. "The truth."

"I… Ed, I resigned today," he blurted out, equally relieved to have some of that weight dissipate since keeping that from her had seemed worse than the act itself. "M'm not a cop anymore. I told Dad and Renzulli."

"Oh… okay," she responded softly while her brow wrinkled as she took a moment and sought to process that information which would have rocked her like a bombshell just days ago, but now came off less as shock and awe but more of a slow, inevitable fizzling dud descending.

"Why?"

"Why?" Jamie repeated with a somewhat incredulous, puzzled tone when she didn't counter as vehemently as anticipated. "Ed, c'mon because I can't… I mean I probably won't ever be able to," he backpedaled while waiting for her reaction which remained surprisingly restrained.

"No, you told them first and not me," she refocused but without coming off as insecure or accusing. "Why?" was asked again before the silence grew longer and became, well… uncomfortable. "Insert crickets, Reagan. Still here waiting... I'm not going anywhere, and you know that. Even if my hormones are raging and I'm acting like an EDP, I'll always be here for you."

"I guess I couldn't before because telling you makes it real," he choked out finally in a barely audible whisper. "It makes all of this real and I couldn't make myself admit that."

"Jamie…"

"No, Ed, I can't do it… I can't go through this and try to pretend that it's gonna go back to being perfect anymore," he coughed and grimaced as in his mind the tension grew and he waited while she closed her eyes and regretted ever saying those words.

"Then don't! I don't want you to pretend anymore!" she implored finally after finding her voice again. "And I don't want you to think that's what I'm worried about because it's not. Okay, so things aren't perfect now… see? I get that and admit it's my fault you feel that way. I told you the other day we're going to get through this together, and if we have to, we'll accept that some things need to change or figure out how to move on. I know how much you love the job, Jamie, but if you need to do something else, it's gonna be fine. All I want to hear is this doesn't mean you're giving up on yourself too soon, because I know that Jamison Henry Reagan, the man I love loyally and fiercely is _not_ a quitter."

"I'm not _quitting,"_ Jamie added quietly, but with an emphasis and resolve that rang true and eased her mind. "I promise I'm not… but I felt like I had to do that and I've gotta stay here to make this better for all of us," he explained with a thought towards the FBI investigation which needed to be completed quickly and efficiently if there was any hope of keeping Kenzie's study unscathed and that job offer from the bureau intact. "Dragging me back and forth every few days just makes that harder and puts too much stress on you and Kaylin right now anyway… maybe we can try again in a couple of weeks or so when I can get around by myself a little better," he conceded optimistically before adding another bit of truth and directing the conversation back towards her. "Eva needs to start her new job, and I don't want you to have to babysit me and take more time off of work."

"So she told you about the spot Saunder's offered upstairs in the squad, didn't she?" Eddie asked as she tried to hone in on his motivation… surely that had to be part of his reasoning.

"Yeah… and m'm so proud of you Edit Katalin," Jamie tried to assure as he swallowed a huge lump in his throat while their NYPD careers passed in opposite directions like two ships in the night. "You really deserve it, lambchop. I'm so sorry I wrecked that for you yesterday."

"You didn't and I don't… not really, anyway. Pop made a call and pulled a hook," she revealed bluntly. "I'm hoping that most of the cops in the house will be okay with it since it's just desk work, but maybe it's not fair… that's something that should have happened for you a long time ago and I think your Dad's pretty ticked at him for it."

"I'm sure he is, but yes, you do deserve it. You stayed at the 12th and put your time in on patrol all these years, plus you're still gonna have to earn your place," Jamie assured as he lay back and rubbed his head, settling back into that familiar role as senior partner and advisor in their relationship even in this current state. "Pop may have gotten the door to open, but it's up to you to keep it from closing and it's going to be hard with our last name because no matter how good you are that's all people see sometimes. I want that for you, Eddie… as much as you want me to be back to what I was… I want you to have the chance to be so much more than what you were before, even with taking my last name and the new baby. Please promise that no matter what happens to me that you won't give up on this."

"I won't if you don't… and now that I'm up there all I can do is the best job I can while I have the chance, right? But you didn't have to resign yet, did you? We could have waited to see. What about your disability and insurance? You can't just walk away from that can you? Even with you in this study there's still other bills to pay," she worried.

"Yeah, Dad said the same thing… that I wasn't thinking that part through, and it didn't need to be done right away, officially anyway so not to put the paperwork in. I still felt like I had to tell him though," he reiterated while neglecting to say he had already taken the oath for another agency which both made that necessary and at the same time precluded him for going all in on this truth bonanza. Some things would have to be worked out and forgiven later, he reasoned. "I'm gonna have ups and downs for a while. I can't aim for something that's out of reach and going back on the street is a pipe dream for me, but being a detective is right there for you now, Ed… that and more. Maybe you'll even be the next Reagan to go on to be commissioner," he chided a little to break the tension. "I'm just trying to get things back together and start putting things on the right shelf," he explained before trailing off. "You wanted me to be honest…"

"I did, and I do," Eddie assured, grateful for that pep talk even as she heard a knock at the front door downstairs that triggered a renewed guilt and reminded her she had been withholding the truth about the conflict with Erin and all that entailed. Now seemed as good a time as any to start to put that away in a box in their metaphorical closet even if it meant the relationship with her sister-in-law would never be the same. "Jamie, that family meeting we had tonight… there was some… well, it got a little heated with your sister. She's been," she paused and wondered just how far to take it, deciding against mentioning the POA and downplaying the extent of it until they could discuss this in person. "I mean we've kinda been arguing about how to best care for you and after what happened yesterday… she blamed me for taking you to Kaylin's practice and it put things over the top. Mom and Linda defended me and now they're all mad at each other too and not really speaking. I'm so sorry… I feel bad about that. Linda must too… she called before wanting to talk and sounded so upset I told her to come over right away. She's downstairs now."

"Now? This late?" Jamie observed as he looked at the time and shifted uncomfortably in his bed, regretting that he was out of the loop on so much and wishing more than anything now that he was back at home and snuggled under the covers next to her after hearing about the family strife. "It was so bad that Linda got into it? God, I knew something was up because Erin's been acting off and hasn't been around… I need to talk to her. She can't be putting this stuff on you now!" he snapped as his anger grew at the thought at his sister's mother hen-pecking ways being aimed at his wife and obviously been hidden from him as well.

"Jamie, please don't… please, honestly," she paused at that word which seemed to be a recurring theme in this purging conversation. "Wow, there we are again… I didn't want to put this on you either. I know I should have said something before and maybe it wouldn't have come to this, but I didn't want you having to decide between us when there was so much other stuff to worry about. We'll work this out when you're feeling better, okay? I swear to you I'm fine right now… all I needed to hear was that you were getting better. Nothing else matters to me except you and our girls… not our jobs or some stupid fight with Erin. This thing with your sister can be fixed one way or another tomorrow, the next day or whenever, alright? I love you with all my heart, Jamison Reagan. Now get some more sleep and I promise we'll talk about it again when I come to see you, and then we'll decide how to handle it… like partners," she finished.

"Partners... okay," he agreed before adding a relieved good night now that it seemed they had found their way back to each other once more. "And honestly… I love you more, Edit Katalin."

###

"Linda, come in! Edit is upstairs in her room speaking to Jamison… he finally called at this late hour," Eva Janko urged even as she tightened her housecoat against the chill at the open front door and observed the small travel bag their late-night guest was carrying. "Dear, what's wrong? You look as if you've been crying! Come, Edit is fine, you will see. Do not be so worried."

"I'm sorry for bothering you so late," Linda apologized and paused to wipe a tear from the corner of her eye, "I don't know why I came, it's just that after that meeting Danny and I… we had a big fight over…" she caught herself before it could be said as the whole proposed scenario with Marcus's possible baby had been playing nonstop in her mind on the drive over and she was thankful to have made it there safely while so distracted. "I just didn't know where else to go and I didn't want to be alone right now. Do you mind if I stay here tonight?"

"Of course not! Jamison's bed downstairs is freshly made up if that's suitable," Eva assured with a hint of worry now as she ushered her inside and closed the door. "I'm afraid Kaylin is already asleep in her room so we cannot move her for more privacy."

"No, I don't want to put anyone out," Linda replied sadly even as she allowed the older Janko woman to take her bag and guide her over to the couch.

"You are not," Eva soothed in her newfound maternal fashion while she quickly made her way into the kitchen to prepare another cup of tea. "And I must thank you for the stand you took for my daughter tonight. It is not easy to know my place in a family discussion like that. I know she was unsettled, but it was not right though what was said against her, and she and Jamison must be allowed to have their own thoughts."

"It's hard to know where I fit in sometimes too, even after all of these years," Linda admitted as she considered the huge emotional mess swirling around within the family right now… and most of the others were unaware of the whole extent of it. "I guess it comes with marrying into such a close-knit group sometimes. Erin's always been a little too involved with Jamie after their mother died, but she had no right to do what she did this time and I just couldn't sit there and not say something."

"Well, I hope that will be resolved now since he's seen some improvement and might look after himself a bit better," Eva continued with a tenderness evident towards her son-in-law. "It will be his place to put it to rest for good I believe once he hears how it has upset Edit. Surely your Daniel is the same," she tried to hearten. "I have seen he is a good father for your boys. Whatever was said tonight between the two of you can be undone."

"No, it's not like that... he _was_ trying to be a good husband, he just can't understand the way a woman looks at things sometime," Linda admitted softly with a pang of guilt now at her reaction as both looked up to the stairs to see Eddie hurrying down while wiping her own eyes although the warm smile on her face made it apparent that she had fared far better in the conversation with her own Reagan brother.

"Jamison, he is still well?" Eva pried immediately.

"Yes, Mom… he's feeling better now that he got some more rest. We had a really good open and straightforward talk and worked out some stuff. We agreed it's best for him to stay there for now, but things are sooo much better between us," Eddie informed with a deep sigh of relief before her gaze fell to her sister-in-law who was obviously not in the same state.

"This is very good to hear," Eva acknowledged with a satisfied nod as it seemed the tide had turned for the better at least on one front… two really as Kaylin had been much more settled now that Bear had returned. "Linda will be staying with us until the same is made right with Daniel," she informed with stern conviction.

"Danny? What happened? Oh no, Linda!" Eddie gasped. "You didn't fight because of me and Erin, did you? I really appreciate you standing up for me, but not if it came between the two of you!"

"No, that wasn't it," Linda admitted sadly. "He was totally for me putting Erin in her place… I think he even enjoyed it. Something else came up though..." she trailed off and added even as an overwhelming urge was welling inside to talk to someone that might understand although first it felt like there was an explanation to be made. "Eddie, I feel like I owe you a big apology," she began her own confession. "The past few months ever since you and Jamie found out about being pregnant… well, I wasn't always very nice to you either. I've been… jealous," she forced the word out slowly with a heavy swallow. "Things haven't worked out for us that way again and it wasn't fair to you, especially when you've had so much else to worry about."

"Oh, Linda… no, I'm so sorry, please don't worry about that," Eddie frowned at that obviously painful highly personal admission as she sat down on the couch next to her sister-in-law and gave her a hug. "Jamie and I kinda figured something like that was going on… or he did after he talked to his dad, but we were afraid to bring it up. I never meant for you to feel bad either. I can't even imagine how hard that is… I know you went for testing, is it your back?" she asked gently before reaching for a tissue from the nearly depleted box on the side table and offering it.

"That and the fact Danny and I aren't exactly spring chickens anymore. The neurologist said I would be risking permanent nerve damage and there's nothing we can really do about that now," Linda conceded while more tears fell and as she gratefully accepted the gesture. "I've always wanted another, but Danny was more or less done right after Sean was born… or at least he thought he was until last week..." she trailed off as her throat closed and she took Eddie's hand. "That day he left you at Dr. Geisner's office, it's because I was there too," she whispered. "He didn't know, but I took a test the week before and it was positive so I made an appointment to confirm before I told him. When they gave me the results from the blood draw and told me it wasn't viable, I was upset and the nurse saw him in the waiting room thinking he was there for me so brought him back to tell him…"

"Oh no!" Eddie paled with wide eyes and instant guilt at being responsible for Danny's presence in the office that day and a colossal semi-public spilling of the bean as it was obvious what must have come next. "Oh my God! I had no idea!"

"I know. I kept it from him, and everyone else. We lost our baby… our last chance, Eddie…" Linda cried into her shoulder for several minutes while she was comforted as the needed release came. Even Eva was stunned by that admission and quietly sank into the nearby armchair, unsure of what to offer as this brought up a personal tragedy of her own that had long been sequestered in the past. "No one else knows what this feels like! Mary did before they had Jamie," she corrected. "Frank does I guess, but I just can't talk to him like Danny can. He just says a man can't understand."

"I do as well, my dear," the older Janko woman finally revealed. "It is a pain like no other. Before Edit, there was one who was lost too soon," she admitted something that came as no surprise to her daughter who had been told about her mother's miscarriage before in passing. "It was far enough along that I required the doctor to intervene and did not wish to try again afterwards, but Armin was adamant and two years later my daughter came. I am grateful to him for that now even if we did not agree at first."

"Wow, Mom," Eddie murmured at that stunning admission. "I never thought I'd ever hear you say something like that about Dad out loud."

"It is true," Eva insisted with a reminder. "I am trying to be better, my lány, even if it is not always easy with him."

"Well, things have been rough between Danny and me since then too, so tonight when Erin started in on her I told you so's I just kinda snapped," Linda finally admitted after gathering herself once more. "God, if she had heard about this and said something like that to me or pulled that stunt with the forms I would have killed her outright..."

"...and no one would have ever found the body," Eddie finished in a familiar Reagan family way before turning some newly formed anger at her brother-in-law. "But Danny… he's not supporting you now? That doesn't sound like him! He was all about defending me in front of the 12th yesterday. I mean, I understand it was probably a shock at first, but it took two didn't it? He needs to man up and be there for you!" she insisted with an outsider soul sister vow to take a trip back across the Verrazano to Staten Island immediately to express that opinion in person if necessary since Linda had stepped in front of Erin's arrows earlier for her.

"No, it's not like that… he has been there for me. It was an accident, and it wasn't fair what I did to him either. Danny was against it mostly because of my health and the money part of it, but he's been trying really hard to understand... maybe too much," Linda defended as she wrestled with sharing the news about the Marcus predicament given the fact that Eddie was a colleague in the same precinct and neither she nor Jamie were apparent fans of the younger officer. "He just came up with a stupid, boneheaded idea tonight thinking he was making it better, and it made me feel like that much more of a failure. That's why I had to leave… I just couldn't take it after everything else that happened and needed to find some space to breathe and talk to someone who would understand."

"Well, I don't know how hard it is to lose a baby like the two of you have and I pray I never do, please God," Eddie conceded softly as her hand slid down protectively to her own belly. "There can't be anything more devastating. Munchie might have some problems, but I just know in my heart she's gonna be okay. I loved this baby from the second that line showed up on the test though, and I'm so sorry for your loss, Linda, but I can totally relate to getting bad news from Dr. Geisner without your husband there to hold your hand. In a way, maybe it was a good thing that Danny came to the office with me that day so he was there for you when you needed him?"

"Maybe," Linda murmured in agreement. "I can't imagine going through it without him now."

"I know. I have to go back for another scan next week and if that shows the baby's kidneys are worse or my fluid level is lower she's sending me up to a specialist at Boston Children's when I'm at eighteen weeks," she revealed sadly. "Jamie will never be able to make that trip."

"Then one of us will be there for you," Eva spoke up. "I will not let you go there alone."

"Me either," Linda assured with an affectionate squeeze of the hand as the family ties strengthened since neither Eddie nor Eva had passed any judgement like Erin might have when she heard how the situation with her brother had been handled, but only offered heartfelt sympathy for what had occurred. "Even if it even comes to that which it probably won't, right? Sisters need to stick together no matter how bad things get. We've had enough things go wrong."

"Well, Jamie says that everything happens for a reason," Eddie concluded. "Like when Kaylin was in that car accident at the bridge. That was a terrible day and it turned out to be the biggest blessing when it brought the three of us together as a family so I guess that's what we have to hold on to right now and have faith that all this will work out for the best. Maybe we all have some more of that in store?"

"Maybe you're right," Linda added thoughtfully as she sat back and considered the unlikely scenario that brought the now much-loved child of two drug-dealing neglectful addicts into a family of police officers to raise as their own. "Danny thought his brother was crazy for jumping off a bridge and adopting a baby when he was single, but now none of us can imagine life without her or you, Eddie… He was talking about fostering," she finally explained the disagreement with her husband after a long pause. "Tonight, that's what the fight was about... we can't afford to do anything else and someone we know got themselves in trouble," she admitted while leaving out pertinent details, or so she thought. "You might as well know... we were shouting about it loud enough for the boys to hear. I'm sure it will be the topic at Sunday's dinner," she sighed. "Thing is he wants the father to stay involved. I just… it was too soon to even think about that."

"Of course it was!" Eddie agreed in solidarity as her mouth dropped open in shock at that admission. "You're still grieving! That sounds like those people who tell you to just go to the shelter and pick up another pet if you lose one, only a thousand times worse!" she railed with her blue eyes welling in sympathy. "He should have known better! No wonder why you needed some space!"

"You know how he is… he saw it as a win-win and couldn't understand when I didn't."

"Yeah, but Danny's not usually _that_ bad, and he wouldn't bring up something so crazy to you for just anyone," Eddie began piecing things together like the detective she aspired to be. "He _wants_ to keep the father in the picture? I can't imagine if we had done that…" she added with the notion of Jared Quinlan taking them and his biological daughter hostage the previous summer in the very house they were sitting in still fresh in her mind. "It must be someone he's really close to…" she trailed off until it clicked and the conversation at the precinct the day before made sudden sense. "MARCUS!" she gasped. "Seriously? It is, isn't it? That's why he was asking me all that stuff about paternity leave yesterday! I thought he was just being a jerk because I was stuck at the desk on modified!"

"Yes," Linda admitted with regret at letting that slip. "But please… just between us. I don't even think Danny's talked to him about it yet. Marcus isn't even sure the baby is his. He had a one-night stand with some badge bunny that wants to give the baby up before she goes to the academy next fall."

"Wow, and I thought Jamie telling me he resigned from the NYPD was going to be the biggest news of the night," Eddie sighed as she sat back bonelessly against the cushions to contemplate all that while Eva frowned and immediately got up to hurry into the kitchen on an apparent mission. "Where are you going, Mom?" she called after her.

"In search of some spoons and that terrible ice cream you crave," came the knowing reply back as the freezer drawer opened and her daughter's favorite stash was revealed. "It is late, but it seems there is much to talk about now."

* * *

 _So, has Linda softened to Danny's idea even if he was way out of bounds bringing it up so soon? Maybe a little, and it was good for her to be able to voice that to family members without judgement, but her husband is not likely to get the same response from a pair of siblings who were not expecting another egg might appear in the Staten Island nest. Next, Danny has a breakfast chat with the boys and Frank has an unexpected and nervous visitor at the office_

 _Special thanks to L.L.L. for providing some suggestions for this set of chapters. Also a shout out to lawslave, jlmayer and BlueBlood82 for their continued help as "awesome" sounding boards over the past however many months as this piece evolves._


	79. Chapter 79

Chapter 79

"Anyone want some more pancakes?" Danny asked with a spatula in his hand and a probing eye around the corner from the kitchen as he noted the first provided stack was basically untouched on the table with two sour-looking faces still somewhat weakly bent on a mutual strategy of a coordinated silent treatment failing to respond.

"Okay, then… so I guess I'll take that as a no," their father concluded with an equally embittered expression as he grumpily pushed the skillet off the burner with a heavy, long sigh and turned the stove off before grabbing a plate and a fresh mug of coffee for himself and purposefully going out to join his sons for an uncomfortable, strained breakfast as last night's accidental family addition reveal had not gone over well among the men of the family once Linda left.

"Pass the syrup, please," came the next request to be ignored, but this time a heavy hand came down on the table to rattle the plates and silverware as Sean broke his resolve and nervously glanced up while he pushed the bottle over.

"Thank you," Danny frowned as he studied his youngest's expression, instantly concluding that as usual he was the weak link in this brotherly standoff and could be broken with little effort. Never one automatically to take the easy road, he instead set his sights on his oldest child who had displayed the biggest proverbial Irish-blooded chip on his shoulder when his father had tried to explain what had been overheard in that fight with Linda the night before. Both boys had been shut down and sent to their rooms to stew after a few angry remarks following their mother's shocking outburst and sudden departure and Danny wisely put off any further discussion until his own temper had cooled a bit, but now it was time to take a couple of young bulls by the horns and sort through the mess before Linda returned. The trick was to get the perp talking and Daniel Reagan was the master at knowing exactly what buttons to push to accomplish his goal.

"So are we going to have a real discussion about what you guys heard last night, or are we all going to sit here until next year?" he challenged with a knowing, deliberate barb.

"Huh?" Sean reacted predictably with wide eyes knowing the family's propensity for long stubborn standoffs before Jack stepped in to squash his brother's gullible bubble.

"It's New Year's Eve, numbnuts," his older brother broke his resolve. "C'mon, you fall for that line every year."

"Do not!"

"Do too!"

"Yeah, that was really mature," Danny scoffed assuming that Jack's biggest objection to the fact that his mother had become pregnant in the first place was that his parents apparent still-active sex lives would be totally embarrassing to hm if it got out and become the talk of the close-knit Catholic school he and Sean were enrolled in. Unfortunately that was a bit off the mark. "Look, I know you guys have some questions and kids aren't usually comfortable discussing this stuff with their parents or hearing about it… trust me, that goes both ways, but your mom called earlier and she'll be back home after lunch, so we _will_ have this hashed out by then… understood? If you have questions, ask them now otherwise once she's here we're done. She's been through enough already."

"So why does Mom want another baby?" Sean started at the ground level, ignoring the kick under the table he received from his older sibling. "Aren't me and Jack good enough?"

"Sean, it's not about the two of you being good enough," Danny assured with a softer tone. "You're our sons and we will love you the same and be there for you no matter what. Mom just always had it in her mind that she would like a family with three kids, but after you were born we decided maybe it was best to stop where we were at because to give you guys the life we wanted with a nice house like this and good schools, well, we couldn't afford more."

"Now you can?"

"No… not really," Danny answered honestly as he shifted back in his chair and considered the fact that once he had made first grade there had been little initiative on his part to try to climb the corporate NYPD ladder in search of a higher salary. "But with Eddie and Jamie having a baby now and Grandpa Henry helping with your college savings, your Mom thought about it again, and it's something we talked about looking into. We wanted to make sure it was safe for her though, so that's why she had that test done on her back. Unfortunately it didn't go too well."

"But that hurt her," Jack pointed out angrily as he did whenever something threatened his mother medically now or brought up the memories from the hospital shooting. "You shouldn't have let them do that! You should have said no!"

"It wasn't supposed to do that. The doctor thought it would be safe, but your mom's back is a little worse off than we thought so it got irritated and he told her that having another baby herself wasn't a good idea. By that time we didn't know it yet, but she was already pregnant."

"But Mom said the baby died," his youngest noted sadly with brimming eyes as he considered that now known fact.

"It did, Sean. Almost right in the beginning before it even got started. The doctor said that happens a lot… most times the woman doesn't even know about it and it's nobody's fault, but it made Mom very, very sad anyway because it was a part of her, right? And something she wanted very badly."

"Then why would God take it away?" Sean asked. "Mom's a good mom!" he insisted. "He shouldn't have done that!"

"She is a good mom, so you guys need to count your blessings and remember that now. You want to tell me now why you were so upset about all this last night?"

"Jack said if there was a new baby, it would take my room," Sean admitted with shame as he looked down. "I like my room."

"Okay, well we never got far enough to even talk about that," Danny admitted with a frown and an annoyed glance at his oldest for trying to play something like that off on his younger brother in an effort to turn him against the idea. "Besides, my parents made me share a bedroom with Aunt Erin at first after Jamie was born, so it's something families deal with… not a reason to act like you did last night," he chastised before continuing while conveniently glossing over the fact that he had ended up with his sister only after his father discovered that he was terrorizing Joe with fake spiders and noises every night to the point where the little boy wasn't sleeping anymore. "Jack, I get that you don't like to see Mom hurting after everything that happened before, but it was more than that."

"She left! You made her so upset, she left!" Jack railed as he considered the renewal of the marital rough patch which had caused so much anxiety the previous summer while Linda and Danny had separated briefly while dealing with the residual effects of that shooting… an event that had caused post traumatic stress in more than one member of this family it appeared. "Now you're apart again and it's all because you wanted to bring another kid in here. I heard you!"

"Mom was upset when she left because I brought something else up before she was ready to deal with it, but it's not like it was before," Danny tried to assure. "I did screw up and I should have known better than to do that. She just needed to talk to someone who gets where she's at right now, so she went back to see Eddie. Remember that when you're older… a man can't always understand everything a woman is going through. I'm not mad at her because she did that. It was late, so she stayed there. Like I said, we already talked, and she's coming home after lunch."

"I don't want another brother or sister! It's a stupid idea! The one I have now is a twerp that never backs me up!"

"Hey!" Sean objected to that characterization even if it was true in this instance. "That's not fair! Dad said we had to talk, or we'd sit here all day!"

"Well, that's not really your call, is it?" Danny bit back a little more sharply at Jack's continued insubordination in spite of his best attempt to stay even-tempered. "Besides, aren't you the one that's talking about all kinds of out-of-state schools like Notre Dame? Michigan State? Huh? Another nine months and you'll be out of here anyway and only coming home once a semester if that!"

"So what? Mom wants to replace me?!" Jack snapped finally as all the feelings he had been stirring around inside overnight started to open up. "I'm going to college, not leaving forever!"

"That's what you think? That our family revolves around just you?" his father fired back, surprised at that juvenile admission of classic sibling rivalry envy and jealously given his son's age. "Look I'm not saying we will or we won't… but it's up to Mom and what she wants. Not you, not Sean… and right now not me at this point because I asked her to give up a lot all these years, and it's time I put her first. No matter what she decides, you're not losing your mom, Jack. She's always going to be there for you."

"Yeah well it sure doesn't feel that way! I mean she's not here now, is she?!" Jack retorted angrily as he got up and shoved the chair back against the table. "Are we done? You just told me that I don't have any say in it, anyway!" he added before turning to climb the stairs two at a time and slamming his bedroom door.

"Ay yi yi," Danny sighed as he rubbed his face and leaned the chair back before letting it bang back down in frustration wondering how they had raised such an egocentric child as he eyed his youngest for a final challenge to see if things would go better there. "You got something you want to add?"

"If we get a new baby, will I have to change its diapers?"

"Maybe sometimes," Danny acknowledged with a slight grin and hoped the ability to do that was inherited from his wife's side as he had always been an abject failure in that regard and it was obvious that Sean was a little more open to the idea. "But you also get a chance to be somebody's big brother, and I gotta tell you that's pretty cool sometimes too."

###

"Lieutenant Renzulli to see you without an appointment, sir," Detective Abigail Baker's voice interrupted Frank's thoughts as he was intently studying the intel reports coming in from the NYPD anti-terrorism task force assigned to protect the iconic New Year's Eve ball drop in Times Square that night. Even after the contentious meeting at home the evening before and the known challenges facing several members of the family now, the NYPD Police Commissioner could not afford for a second to ignore the important event and the multitudes of threats it brought to the city, its citizens and the hundreds of thousands of visitors he was sworn to protect. It was somewhat bittersweet to realize though that for the first time in decades really he was the sole Reagan on duty to welcome the dawn of the next year with his father retired, Joe gone, Danny and Eddie both off shift and Jamie now resigned, even if it was unofficially, from the department. It was that last truth that had surely instigated this unannounced visit from his youngest son's friend and former TO on a busy day like this. Had it been anyone else the request would have been denied outright, but a large debt of gratitude was owed to this particular Lieutenant who had never before approached his ultimate boss for anything less than a good reason.

"Send him in," Frank acknowledged with a huff as he rocked back in his chair and pushed his glasses up as a nervous-looking Anthony Renzulli entered the room with a pained grimace while clutching his uniform hat as he waited for the door to be closed behind him before addressing Frank head on.

"Sir," he began. "Thank you for seeing me. I know you must be busy today doing... well, whatever it is that you do, but I was here for the Manhattan precinct briefing with Lieutenant Ghormley downstairs, and it just didn't feel right leaving without talking to you."

"This is about Jamie and his decision to resign, I take it," Frank sighed and gestured for the other man to take a seat in front of the desk. "I know he communicated that to you as well."

"Yes, sir," Renzulli admitted as he sat down while wrestling with his emotions, having not been certain that his former boot brought this to his father's attention yet, but somewhat relieved to see that he had not jumped the gun on that aspect. Once he had heard about the incident at the house and Jamie being re-hospitalized in the afternoon after his visit though it was all he could think about.

"Out with it, Lieutenant," Frank prodded. "We're off the record here. Permission to speak freely."

"Yes, sir. It's just that I think he's rushing into this too fast," Renzulli started in at a similar pace. "I know he's your son and this might not be any of my business, but there's gotta be some way he can stay a cop," he pleaded. "I mean it's in his blood and I can't see him doing nothing else. With respect, sir, there should be a place here for him to be what he's supposed to."

"And you think because I've always been such a hardass towards my kids when it comes to the job that I don't know that?"

"No sir!" Renzulli backed down at first before reminding the Commissioner that this situation was not without precedent. "I don't want to step on anyone's toes, it's just that a couple of years ago there was an officer on a sting undercover with Brooklyn South Narcotics when he got hit by a car and lost his leg below the knee. He was promoted to detective after he came back the next year and works with TARU on investigations now. We got others on the force too. There's even a Marine double amputee that went through the academy in Suffolk County on Long Island who's walking a beat out there now."

"Detective Benidetto," Frank recalled the first reference and the circumstances. "Good man. Met his wife Irene and the family at a dedication service," he added before continuing informally with a sigh as the same thoughts had been permeating through his brain since the discussion with his son the day before. "Tony, this wasn't my decision… it was Jamie's. His situation is a little different though in that he will hopefully stay intact but with limitations that will likely preclude him from staying on the street, and that's his one true calling it seems."

"He's a good cop," Renzulli agreed while nodding. "He's got a way with people."

"Yes he does, and over the years he has been offered the opportunity to move away from patrol and into other areas, but he's declined each time. At first I thought it was just because he was protecting me from talk of nepotism, but do you really think he would be happy anywhere else? Can you see him tied to a desk filing paperwork, answering phones and watching others on a screen instead of where he wants to be?"

"I… well no, sir," Renzulli fumbled and answered truthfully as he recalled the first time a young third-year Officer Reagan had been placed on mandatory modified duty after the justified shooting of a man waving a gun at children in a park. "He'd be miserable... sure ain't cut out for PR when he's like that," he admitted.

"No he's not. You know what he asked me once not too long ago? If I had the chance..." Frank mused as he considered his strong-minded perceptive child. "That if I had the chance to do it over again instead of toeing the company line behind my father and moving up every opportunity that presented itself until I was sitting behind this desk… he wanted to know where I would rather be, and the honest answer is right where he was making the barstools," he added in reference to that father-son conversation about someone keeping an eye on the shop floor of the family business.

"Excuse me, sir?" Renzulli puzzled over that analogy for a second before shaking it off and deciding to move on without question as he remained too nervous to challenge his boss on the meaning. "I know that's not what he wants, but he's damn good at it! Harvard makes the whole precinct run better, just like he did with this CompStat auditing team," Renzulli insisted. "Maybe if he had a chance to try to fit into something like that here at 1PP he'd realize just how much we need him," he choked up while realizing that despite the anger he'd held towards the Commissioner upon initially hearing the news that instead it was Jamie who was seemingly selling himself short and not the other way around. By the look reflected in those soulful eyes, Frank Reagan was more heartbroken over the thought of his youngest son leaving the NYPD than anyone else. "He's got talents that are needed. The department just isn't the same without him. If not this, then what else is he gonna do? Because I tell ya I'm pretty sure I'm gonna be tryin' to talk him down off a ledge on the GW in a few months if he's stubborn and decides flipping through all that lawyer-speak in those thousand-page corporate contracts he moonlights with is the way to go," he added with genuine worry.

"Tony, you have no idea how complicated this is," Frank revealed ironically as he only considered the fact that there was one seemingly imminent threat to the family that needed to be dealt with first without knowing that his injured son had involved himself in a totally separate FBI investigation at the same time. "But I've put him off on finalizing anything for now. Maybe when he's a little further along in the process and can step back with more clarity to reconsider and we can both talk to him again."

"Yes, sir," Renzulli noted with relief that nothing was a done deal yet as he stood up to take his leave. "I just wanted you to know there's no one at the 3-5 or 12th from the rookies to the CO's that doesn't wanna see Harvard stay on the job, and if there is, they can deal with me. No one will think he's getting any kind of hook to do that. He's one of us."

"Noted, Lieutenant," Frank dismissed him with a heavy sigh as he turned his attention back to the pertinent matters at hand. "That will be all."

* * *

 _Maybe there's hope for Jamie to stay in the family business after all when all of this is said and done, although it looks like he's going to have to be willing to trade up from the shop floor to do it. Next, we check back in the present to see if our hero has a renewed reason to hope since we last left him many, many (sorry!) chapters ago on the hillside just as the sound of sirens returning became evident. Then it's back to the past where all three pairs of our lovebirds will reflect on where they are as couples when New Year's Eve arrives with some fireworks for Kenzie and Rick, while Jamie and Eddie celebrate an anniversary of sorts and the past comes back to haunt Danny once more._

 _As for the "hook" issue concern expressed in some of the reviews (and believe me, I'm glad it sparked some discussion because otherwise things in werks-world would get boring, right?), anyone who has read through the various stories in these series knows that I like to plant little seeds in each one for the coming installment. This is one such little bud that will remain mostly as an undercurrent here as Eddie explores the concept of what it would take for her to become a detective, but then will carry through later from the very first chapter of a piece called "This Meeting Never Happened," which I've already started writing even as I'm still finding time to finish this one. Without revealing too many details and spoiling the surprise, some of the actions certain characters have taken both here and in the past might just be cause for regret. More on that later!_

 _For anyone interested in the story behind Danny and Erin's one-night stint as roomies, you can read Chapter 4 "Prequel - Operation Relocation" in the original Snapshots collection in my profile._


	80. Chapter 80

Chapter 80

 _March 14, 3:45 am_

 _Sirens… they were coming back. His prayers had been answered. Or had they?_

" _Oh, thank you! Thank you, God! Eddie, you did it! They're coming back!" Jamie's now almost non-existent hoarse voice cried as his heart swelled with hope at the faint jingling sounds that grew stronger coming up over the rise before becoming full-throated, echoing wails as they crested the same hill Danny's car had taken a near nosedive down while it followed the fleeing Chevelle, slipping and sliding on the icing surface while his brother fought the wheel to keep it from rolling over or plunging down into the icy, raging river below, thankfully coming to a thudding rest against a pine tree at the base of the bridge with little damage to the Jeep or its occupant at that point before the final fateful standoff with the Malevsky's began._

" _Help! M'm up here!" he struggled project when the noise had quieted as the emergency vehicles were apparently parked near the accident scene with flashing lights still evident in the sky above against the clouds, but the pitiful little sounds emanating from his sore, dry throat were instantly whisked away and drowned out by the subtle rustling of dead leaves and twigs against one another and the rush of the water below. "Please find me!" he internalized instead with a fervent prayer to whoever was down there. "Dad!" he tried out loud one last time. "It has to be Dad, he's the one that would come," Jamie guessed correctly as he tried to wrap his brain around what might be going on beyond that berm. He assumed they finally knew he was missing now, but that didn't mean anyone would march right up here to this very spot where he lay crumpled up in the dark at the base of an old tree under a pile of last year's leaves, and it was clear now that he was running out of valuable time as the cold bit further into his body, zapping it of what little strength remained. Indeed, if he could only hear the heated conversation Frank Reagan was having at that very moment just a few hundred yards away with the part-time county coroner finally rounded up and tasked with retrieving the body that had been left at the scene, his resolve to keep fighting might have dwindled away to nothing._

" _C'mon!" he begged and struggled for the hundredth time to push himself back up the steep slope he had fallen down in a failed effort to return to the top of the ridge above the river, but once again to no avail and there were no signs of a search forthcoming after what felt like another endless wait. "I can't! I can't get back up there! I tried!" he moaned in panicked frustration and considered for a moment the route he had taken to get to this point after fighting his way up here… hopping and limping, at times more often than not crawling and dragging himself along on his hands and belly through thick brush and over the unforgiving frozen ground while searching for a signal that might save Danny's life since there was none to be had down in the hollow where the remnants of the Jeep had burned after a ruptured gas line met with an overheated engine._

 _That left one inescapable truth._

 _After a lifetime of chasing perps down alleys, Frank Reagan's knees were not what they used to be. There was no way in this frigid weather that his father would ever be able to trace the path up to where his youngest son lay helplessly in the dark, not even if it was outlined in glowing iridescent yellow paint and flashing arrows, and right now he held no faith that anyone else would even try. They'd have to get dogs in to track him and at a minimum that would take hours out here in Podunk county where even the so-called Medical Examiner had to be pulled out of the local tavern at closing bell to perform his appointed duty._

 _It was so damn cold out tonight._

 _Jamie realized with a start for the first time he was at a point where he could use that to his advantage since the pain holding him hostage in this place while it radiated up in nauseating white hot fashion from his leg had finally been dulled by a brain that was becoming numb to the signals and hours of fighting frigid temperatures with the swelling leaving a useless, locked limb behind that offered no help in his struggle to get back up to the top of the rise… but maybe that should no longer be his focus he decided as the sixth of the Admiral's SEAL life lessons offered insight._

 _Rigs had once recounted a story about another almost impossible course containing over twenty obstacles including a 10-foot high wall, a 30-foot cargo net, and a barbed wire crawl to name a few that trainees were forced to navigate at least twice a week. While those sounded imposing, the true test the Commander told him was something ominous called the slide for life… a hand over hand descent down a 200-foot long rope suspended between three 30-foot towers. The seemingly unbeatable record for that obstacle had stood for years until one day a student with familiar intense green eyes decided to go down head first, bravely mounted the top of the rope and thrust himself forward in a dangerous move that was fraught with risk. Failure could mean severe injury, even death or the likelihood being dropped from the program at the very least, but without hesitation that younger man took the plunge perilously fast and instead of several minutes it only took half the time to reach the bottom._

 _In that one decisive moment a skinny, young, nondescript Joel Rigsby had gained notice from his commanders and cemented himself as an instant legend among the bravest souls a nation would ever produce._

 _Years later, a more practical-minded Jamison Reagan paused to weigh his narrow list of options for slightly longer than that as he considered a desperate attempt at his own slide for life to change his apparent fate while he teetered there at the base of that gnarled up tree that had at first prevented an uncontrolled descent down the slippery hill into the angry river below. Somehow he had to get himself out of this brush and into the open where he could be more easily found or resign himself to the fact that he would lay here frozen to death under a pile of leaves in this hellhole while help was literally only yards away. If he couldn't go up, the only other possibility was down where gravity would at least cease to be a determined foe. It was now or never Jamie finally concluded as he was sure he had chunked off his last possible hour alone and very soon the blessed darkness and another waiting brother would welcome him home for the rest of eternity._

" _I'm not gonna let myself give up without trying! I love you, Ed!" he rasped before deciding to end his struggle one way or another as he used all of his remaining strength to push himself sideways around the confining, washed out roots that had held him in this little nested place on the hillside, giving the rest up to God and the pull of the earth as his body plummeted downwards over the rough ground once more with a prayer that something else might stop his unrestrained descent before another heavy hit against a solid object or a splash into the icy current raging below claimed him forever._

 **SEAL Rule #6: If you want to change the world sometimes you have to slide down the obstacle head first.**

* * *

"Jamie? What is it? Are you okay? It's really late," Eddie worried after her phone buzzed with a now familiar number as a glance at the clock on the nightstand showed it to be nearly midnight and her tired, overtaxed brain failed at first to connect the dots with the current date after hearing her device ring.

"Happy anniversary, Ed. Miss you."

"What?… But it's not…" she added in momentary confusion while wondering if it was actually possible he was hitting the meds too hard after waking with a start from the deep sleep she had inadvertently fallen into while reading Kaylin a bedtime story hours earlier.

"Did you forget what tonight is? It's New Year's Eve… guess I'm not gonna get my surf run in this year," he mentioned sadly and hinted at the annual trip to California between the holidays that had been cancelled even before the accident due to Eddie's pregnant state and the fact that after the honeymoon they both needed to save leave time for when the baby was born. "Remember the fireworks, lambchop?" he added instead as disappointment was evident in his voice that she had apparently not made the connection considering they were apart for such a special event.

"Oh, the beach…" her heart skipped a beat as everything clicked in place and she instantly recalled every exquisite detail of last year's engagement at the surfside house in California that had been orchestrated with Jamie's former Harvard roommate Spencer Croft's help. "Of course I remember the fireworks, Jamie," she whispered, careful not to disturb Kaylin who had once again taken over her husband's side of the bed and was sleeping soundly with soft little snores emanating from under the covers. "I remember the warm sand and the breeze coming off the ocean as you knelt down to ask me to marry you, and how the sky lit up in the most beautiful colors just as I said yes. Every time I hear them or see my ring with your mother and grandmother's stones I think about us and how perfect you are for me."

"Was."

" _Are,"_ she insisted. "So much has happened in this past year for both of us, but that's the same… you are still the most perfect man I have ever met and nothing will ever change that."

"Nothing, huh? Suppose I find some cute chickie that's hot for guys with a limp?"

"Jamie," Eddie sighed in frustration even at his attempted humor as she leaned her head back up against the headboard. "Don't do that."

"M'm sorry, you're right… my bad," he agreed with a sad, somewhat defeated laugh. "I guess I'm just really missing you and feeling a little lonely here by myself tonight with no one else to talk to and I needed to hear your voice again… even got the urge to open a window and throw on more blankets for some reason," he kidded to lighten the mood.

"I miss you too… I miss snuggling under the covers with you and how it feels when you roll over and kiss me goodnight… or move on to other things," she flirted as the desire to be one with her husband again would sadly have to wait for a bit longer. "I miss the way your hands feel when they run down my body to make it shiver, and I miss how you know exactly what I need and when… by the time we're back to that in this bed I'll probably be as big as a house and you won't find me sexy anymore," she sighed with a hand running over their growing beloved bump.

"Never happen, Ed…" Jamie assured as he lay with his head back and envisioned her next to him in his favorite lacy camisole. "You will always be the most beautiful woman in the world to me… the only one I'll ever want. I wish I could reach out and touch you right now."

"Soon, baby," she promised. "We'll be back together again soon, and you're not fooling me, Jamison Reagan… I can hear it in your voice. I always know what you need too, remember? You want to talk about something else, don't you? You're scared about what happens after tomorrow, right?" Eddie read him clearly and cut right through to the truth of the matter.

"That, and the baby's tests come back later this week so we find out about Boston," he admitted to the two topics he had been obsessing over all evening as he sat alone for the most part still waiting for a transfer out of his quiet ward. "I want to be there for you, Ed… if we have to go. I'm just not sure I can."

"We don't even have to worry about that yet, Jamie, so let's not. Mom said she would meet me on Wednesday at Dr. Geisner's for the appointment. And you're gonna do fine in therapy when it starts. It's not like Aaron's going to break you in half or anything on the first day, and I'll be up after work that night to see you so we can be together again. You're still getting moved into the other hall with Quincy on Monday morning, right? I wish it were sooner..."

"Yeah, that's the plan. Staff is short tomorrow with the holiday, even Dr. Kenzie said she is taking the day off, so they said I have to wait in here until then to be safe."

"Well, see? You have a chance to rest some more and then after that you'll have a busy day to keep your mind off everything and stuff to look forward to… like me."

"Or like the fact that I'm gonna wash out in front of all these guys? Therapy's in a big room where everyone can see, Ed," he fretted. "I'm just over the effing flu and still can't even get out of bed by myself yet... and I swear every other patient here is a Marine, Army Ranger, or a freaking decorated Navy SEAL. They're tough, like seriously tough. They're not afraid of anything. Danny's right, what if I can't handle it?"

"Jamie, it's not a contest," Eddie frowned knowing that her ultra competitive husband who had never failed to finish first in any class from kindergarten through Harvard law and the academy would see any failure as a sign of weakness, especially in front of these other men he greatly respected, as Erin's words of warning about how her brother handled such things resurfaced.

"I just don't know if I'm ready, Ed."

"Don't let what your brother said before get in your head… it's not like he ever considers how it comes off before he opens his mouth," she added with some contempt given the baby situation with Linda which was another thing she had planned to bring up in person on their next visit before he heard about it from someone else.

"Are you kidding? Have you met anyone here? They've already got me pegged as some kind of ivy-league sugar cookie. I'm lucky Quince has my back, 'cause it's got a target on it already. Rigs already told me he'll be watching… 'Sometimes you've just gotta slide down the rope head first, probie,'" Jamie mocked the last line in Rigsby's deep voice. "That's what he said when he stopped by earlier. Does that sound like he's expecting me to just sit there and let Aaron do all the work like before?"

"Wait, why are you worried about that?" she asked, suddenly concerned about him stressing over this outside influence and not fully understanding the relationship between the three men that had been carefully cultivated on several fronts. "You don't owe him anything… It's not like you're one of his recruits, and the only person you have to answer to is me. I don't want you trying to keep up with Quincy or anyone else. He's not in the same place you are, and you'll just end up hurting yourself because you're pushing too hard, understand? Promise me?"

"Ed, that's not how it works here…"

"Promise me, Mr. Reagan, and I promise you that next year on New Year's Eve when we're together I'll plan something for our engagement anniversary that will top anything that's been done before… fireworks or no fireworks I'll knock your socks… and everything else off," she teased seductively and was rewarded with a genuine laugh from her husband that was music to her ears as she had managed successfully to quell his insecurities and brighten his mood, even if it was for a brief moment just as the clock ticked midnight.

"Okay, I promise, but I'm going to hold you to that. Happy New Year, Mrs. Reagan. I love you."

###

"I know you promised to show me fireworks tonight, Corpsman Fellows, but I'm not sure I was expecting this," Charlotte MacKenzie cooed with a sultry voice into Rick's ear as he pushed her loose amber hair to the side and nuzzled her neck with trailing kisses while her silky blouse was slowly unbuttoned and discarded to the floor.

"Do you want me to stop?"

"Did I say that?" Kenzie smirked as his touch moved to gently tracing the outlines of her bra before circling around her as his rough hands slipped lower into the small of her back until they met with another edge of lace while she returned the favor and started working down his button-up shirt, pausing to caress and kiss each newly uncovered section as she went. "It's just when a girl is promised a welcome to Manhattan-style New Year's Eve experience she has certain expectations… like standing outside in the cold, shoulder to shoulder with two million other people for hours, a ball drop in Times Square, a kiss at midnight… then come the fireworks."

"Does waiting out in the freezing cold for nine hours packed like sardines in a tin can with no public restrooms or food until something drops out of the sky and shells go off sound like fun? Kinda been there, done that, Kenz. We both have."

"To a couple other million other people it does; I mean it's _iconic,_ Rick."

"Really? I think it's _ironic_ that a desert rat like yourself who grew up in Arizona and bragged about it to Navy men while she traipsed around the sand bowls in the Middle East all those years would even consider it, besides… there were other things on my mind for tonight," he admitted with a pause as he searched her eager eyes for permission to continue before his lips crashed into hers and sought the connection he had long pushed away as impossible and wrong, only to admit now it felt so very right. "I had a plan and executed it to perfection," he muttered between heated breaths moments later as he tugged on her lip and she returned the favor by loosening his belt. "Look where we are."

"Oh, so you did?" Kenzie mocked as she pushed him back and looked up with a teasing grin that dared him to try again. "You planned for us to get stuck at the top of the Deno's Wonder Wheel for ten minutes looking out over Coney Island so we could smooch like the rest of the love-starved teenagers up there after touring around the reef tanks at the New York Aquarium for a few hours?"

"Damn, right. Money well spent," Rick assured as he leaned down and pulled her in close once more before lifting her diminutive five-foot even, hundred and nothin' pound frame up into his chest as she wrapped her arms around his neck after a pair of perfectly fitting denims joined the blouse, Birkenstocks and his shirt in the growing pile on the floor.

"Wait, I thought even the Ferris wheel ride was free tonight!" she laughed as he determinedly shifted her to his shoulder and carried her nearly naked body across the room in a fireman's hold, pausing in the kitchen to grab a bottle of chilling champagne and two flutes from the countertop before proceeding up the steps towards the single bedroom loft in her upscale, modern-appointed townhouse which was at the end of St. Nicholas Avenue on the nearside outskirts of Washington Heights and within walking distance to her corner of the Columbia campus. The marbled tiled floors in the kitchen and bathroom, bamboo hardwood covering the large living room with high ceilings, exposed wood beams and original moldings with recessed lights perfectly reflected Kenzie's simple tastes and now appropriately compensated career path as a top surgeon and researcher.

"It was, but you owe me for the rest."

"You cheapskate! Is that what you think of me?"

"Forty bucks for the Bollinger to toast the New Year even though I know you don't drink and won't do more than taste it… ten bucks each for the discounted tickets to see the damn fish and then the penguins because they don't have those where you come from," he reminded as he set the cold, wet, sweating bottle down on the glass top of her nightstand before gently laying her across the bed as he trailed a line of condensation moisture between her breasts and down her stomach before kissing it away, still mesmerized at the way she looked in an exposed lacy, mint green feminine lingerie set… almost expecting to see her wearing the khaki fire resistant military issue garb he remembered hanging on the drying line outside her tent at various camps from before. "Another ten for a little carton of frozen sardines to feed the seals, plus dinner from that Bistro place on the way over. Public servant's salary," he reminded her as his breath began to quicken as their long-awaited time together grew closer. "You're gonna bankrupt me if I'm not careful."

"So you're telling me our date this evening was a hardship for you?"

"Hey, don't forget I had to work my connections to even get off tonight so I'm missing an overtime shift too. Besides that I had to kick in another couple of sawbucks to get the ride operator to take a break when we got to the top." he admitted even as the last clasps were being undone and the rest was quickly pulled down and away to reveal the first unfettered closeup view of her body he had ever taken in. "You're so beautiful, Kenz," he stuttered, feeling just like one of those nervous, love-starved teenagers she had accused him of being before instead of an over-forty-something grandfather which was simply the furthest thing from his mind at the moment.

"Well… was it worth it?" she challenged his incredulous look before he leaned down and began softly kissing everything that had been dreamt of for years and just exposed.

"The money?"

"No… the wait I mean," Kenzie huffed with a roll of her eyes as her breath caught while his deliberate, traveling touch and lips both warmed her and sent a shiver down her spine at the same time. "God..."

"And how," he conceded that this moment was worth everything with a deep satisfied murmur as he savored the moment and spent time exploring every newly revealed inch as the urge to be even closer grew while their hearts raced and her hands slipped off his shoulders then softly down his chest, pausing to feel the lines of scars here and there held from a lifetime of putting his body in harm's way to save others… some of which she had even stitched up herself.

"You still look pretty good for an old man even with these," she chided while noting a strong, still-chiseled physique hovering above before helping the khakis over his hips to release what lay beneath. "Commando, huh?"

"For you? Always, Kenz."

"Well, soldier… you promised me fireworks tonight, so you better deliver," she challenged and he rose to the occasion, becoming more insistent and demanding until the formerly singularly focused doctor could think of nothing else but him as they joined together for the first time just as those aforementioned shells began exploding outside up and down the Hudson River ringing in a new year and a new level of intimacy in a relationship that was destined to face a few firefights of its own down the road.

###

"DANNY!... DANNY!" Linda cried out after her already somewhat restlessly sleeping husband suddenly gasped and sat bolt upright in bed at the stroke of midnight just as a few loud fireworks were illegally popped off in a neighbor's yard before slipping off to the side as he wound up on his hands and knees on the floor. The two had been so exhausted after garnering little rest apart the night before they had decided to forgo their usual New Year's Eve festivities and just go to bed together earlier in the evening while Jack and Sean watched the ball drop camped out for the night in the basement room. "WHAT'S WRONG?! Wake up! It's only the Mitchell's next door. They do that stuff every year!"

"JAMIE! NO! NO! He's NOT supposed to be here!" Danny was sobbing as he continued to kneel in his still-altered state and Linda was alarmed to feel his pulse nearly pounding out of his skin as his heart was beating all out of sorts when she joined him on the floor and tried without success to rouse him. "He's just a kid! He's not a soldier!" he hissed in a full-blown anxiety attack as the nightmare continued while rocking back and forth as images of a gravely injured teenager in uniform with sandy brown hair lying before him in a pool of his own blood blinded him to the reality of where he truly was. "He's NOT one of us! He's NOT one of us, and he NEVER will be! I won't EVER let him!"

"Danny, please wake up!" Linda tried again as she wrapped her arms protectively around her obviously distraught husband while the things he was saying started to clue her into the fact this was a manifestation of his lingering wartime PTSD… and clearly the worst instance of that he had ever experienced in her presence. "Oh, dear God in heaven, please help him! Honey, Jamie's not here. Your brother's at Columbia and he's getting better," she insisted. "They're even moving him into a regular room with his friend Quincy on Monday. You're just having a bad dream!"

"NO! IT'S MY FAULT! All my fault! I didn't know! I didn't know he was here!" Danny continued to cry as he collapsed with his elbows and forearms down on the ground as if he was praying next to someone with every fiber of his being. "Oh, God! I SHOT HIM! WHY?! He wasn't supposed to be here! Why was he here?!"

"Danny, please come back to me… shhh… you're alright… you're just having a bad dream," Linda reiterated calmly one more time before finally feeling her husband sag down as the terror began slowly to ebb and release his mind and she pulled his head off the floor and into her lap to cradle him. "Jamie's not here. He's at Columbia with Dr. Kenzie and he's gonna be fine. What happened to him is not your fault."

"Linda, what are you doing…? Oh, God… Linda..."

"That's right, I'm here. Honey, I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere," she assured as she continued to hold him close. "I've got you."

* * *

 _So contrasting reactions there as our couples find themselves in somewhat different places as the ball drops on a new year. Next, Jamie discovers despite all that he's still somewhat unprepared for the beginning of real rehab and an investigation even with the help of an enthusiastic roommate, and after a talk with his wife, Danny decides to pay his brother an unexpected visit to ease his fears over that nightmare. What he sees when he arrives will just begin to intensify those feelings though and raise his suspicion as to what Jamie's motivation for walking away from the job might be._


	81. Chapter 81

Chapter 81

"Danny, I think we still really need to talk about this," Linda insisted as she tried to pin her husband down in the kitchen the following Monday morning even as he was avoiding her eyes and busied himself pouring some high octane coffee before trying to make an escape to work without doing exactly that. "You brushed me off me all day yesterday with church and Sunday dinner, but you can't keep doing this!"

"What's there to talk about?" he tried to deflect as he reached for his travel cup lid, thankful as both were to have made it through a subdued family meal the day before with no mention of their current personal problems after a dire warning was issued to the boys and a certain pair of Janko women had been tight lipped about what was heard the night before out of respect for Linda. "I was tired and had some kind of nightmare. My kid brother's been through hell the past few weeks and it was about him I guess. He's kinda been on my mind lately… that and you and everything else. None of this is about me."

"You guess?! Danny, the Mitchell's fireworks had you on the ground in our bedroom crying and saying you shot Jamie! I'm supposed to just let that go?"

"Well, he wasn't shot… he was hit by a car and ended up on the ground, but yeah… so maybe I feel guilty because I haven't found the bastard that put him there. Just forget about it, Linda, and don't try to shrink me. It was nothing… just a bad dream. Now, I gotta get going or the boys will be late for school," he indicated with a nod to the door and by extension the Jeep sitting in the driveway where his sons were waiting hoping that would get him out of the house without any further discussion. "You want another call from Sister Agnes? That would be a great way to kick off the new year."

"No, Danny, and this isn't about Jamie… it's about you!" Linda insisted as she grabbed his arm and refused to back down. "I haven't seen you like that since the first year after you came back from Iraq! You've been nervous and jumpy since you were in Washington, and you haven't slept well one night since then!"

"Neither have you!" he countered and shrugged off her grip, uncomfortable with the knowledge that she had made the connection back to his time as a Marine since there was more to that dream he remembered but refused to reveal. "You kept _me_ up tossing and turning all last night, and you're the one that left the other day because you were so upset, and I'm the one that's having a problem?" he challenged before softening with an explanation. "I didn't sleep that whole night you were gone because I was pissed off at myself for bringing up that thing with Marcus and the baby, so I was really tired when we finally went to bed together and all of this came out. End of story… sometimes it's just that and we don't need to talk everything to death all the time!"

"Talking helps!" Linda persisted as she refused to give in, but there was something else weighing on her own heart and she was determined not to let him leave until it was likewise off her chest. "Especially with someone who understands what you're going through and is willing to just listen! Sometimes that's all it takes! Please, Danny… don't hide from me."

"I'm not hiding anything, Linda," he tried to assure even though he knew that to be a blatant lie and his heart twinged with guilt before he added a little truthful cover to ease it. "There's just a lot of stuff going on right now with us, and this investigation's got me twisted in circles. Going up to that hospital and seeing my kid brother hanging around with a bunch of injured military guys that Kenzie is working on… yeah, I admit that gets to me. I never wanted him to see what goes on in that world I guess, that's all this is," he avowed as he tried to persuade her to believe him before deflecting once more. "Besides, I'm more worried about you."

"Well, I'm a lot better since I went over to see Eddie and Eva," Linda confessed with absolute honesty as she took him at his word, not picking up on the fact there was much more to be worried about given the circumstances as Mason Malevsky had already made a few more moves of his own that would continue to push Danny's PTSD buttons before the persistent detective got too close in their game of cat and mouse. "I needed that. They reminded me what I'm feeling is okay, and they didn't judge me for any of it or think I was nuts for wanting what I did! Did you know that Eva lost a baby too before she had Eddie, and that Armin was the one who pushed her to try again even though she was against it at first? She's still grateful to him for that even after all they went through since then," she paused and regarded her own husband in that light before revealing the thoughts that had stayed with her and kept her restless since that conversation in Bay Ridge. "They even got me thinking about the way Kaylin came into our family… about how we all thought it was such a crazy idea for Jamie to put himself out that way for a baby girl he didn't even know, and how she's one of us now since he adopted her. We couldn't love her more if she had pure Reagan blood. So, I might…" she hesitated and teared up before adding. "I mean maybe we can talk some more about Marcus."

"Really?" Danny stopped and turned to study her eyes while completely caught off guard by this sudden about face. "Honey, I don't want you to do something you're not comfortable with. It was too soon to bring it up. I see that now."

"We can talk," she reiterated. "But I don't want to be put in some kind of position where we have our hopes up or always have to worry about someone changing their mind and taking it away. I can't open myself up to that again only to lose another, Danny. Maybe there's a way to do what you want… to have Marcus stay involved, but I can't just be there as a part-time nanny though because if we do this, I would fall in love…" she trailed off with her chin quivering. "And if we lost… I can't handle that. It affects our whole family too."

"Oh, babe, I know you would," he admitted softly as he drew her in for a hug and let her rest her head against his shoulder while thinking about Jack's reaction which was another thing that would surely have to be dealt with but had not been brought to his mother's attention yet. "I know you would fall completely in love, and so would I… that baby couldn't ask for a better mom than you. I don't want you to do anything you're not sure about though... We'll talk," he conceded after a long pause between them even as he ignored the staggered beeps coming from the Jeep in the driveway as the boys became more impatient while nervously waiting. "Marcus is still trying to figure out what to do. He called me yesterday and said the girl is pressing him for an answer though or she's going to contact an adoption agency next week. I didn't say anything about us… he wants to man up himself, but he's been told by almost everyone that he's a screw up all his life so he doesn't think he'd be able to handle it. I can ask Jamie what he knows about this stuff… I mean the kid studied up on all those rules when he was fighting that crazy Miss Adams at CPS for Kaylin. Maybe there's a way to do it legally so everyone winds up happy… an open adoption or whatever they call it. Would you like me to do that?" he questioned sincerely as he could clearly read her objective was now to move forward. "Just go ahead as far as that step and see what the options are?"

"Yes," she whispered quietly as despite her intentions to stay reserved that one word had opened up her heart completely to the notion. "Maybe it would be good for Jamie too… so he feels like he's helping someone else. That's all he's ever wanted to do, and now that he told your Dad he's resigning…"

"Wait, he did what?" Danny puzzled as his eyes snapped over. "When?"

"The day before yesterday I guess. Eddie didn't say when he talked to Frank, just that he told her over the phone right before I got there. She thought that was gonna be the biggest news of the night until she heard about what we were going through," Linda sighed. "Any other day it would have been. Your brother loves being a cop."

"Dad must have known when we had that meeting the other night; that's why he stayed out of all that, otherwise it would have just given Erin more ammunition. Now why the hell would the kid go and do something like that already?" Danny bristled a bit as he remained focused on point. "He hasn't even given himself a chance yet, and besides they need his insurance and disability, right? All this hospital stuff isn't cheap even if he's in this study since he's been at that one in DC and St. Vic's too. That doesn't sound like Harvard," he added with worry that maybe his brother was indeed more depressed or messed up in the head from this accident than he had acknowledged.

"Your Dad talked him out of making it official because of that, but Eddie said Jamie told her he made up his mind after talking to Rick and Kenzie... they warned him that even if he regained all function, it would be too much of a risk to stay on patrol."

"Or was it because he hesitated, and now he's just using that as an excuse because of what I said?" Danny asked with renewed guilt over putting that thought process in Jamie's mind before the accident, even as the beeping outside became more persistent with Jack and Sean becoming concerned about the reception they would receive from Sister Agnes if they arrived at school after the first bell. Suddenly demerits for lateness from the strict-minded nun didn't seem very important to their father though who was growing with suspicion as he considered Jamie's reported actions. "Something's not right. There's no rush if he's on disability, and he would have never made a move like that affecting his family without having a solid backup plan in place. That's why he finished his law degree after Mom died. Joe told him he needed a parachute just in case… even if all he wanted to be was a cop."

"Well, now it looks like Joe was right," Linda admitted. "And maybe Jamie has plans to put that to use now. He probably talked to Spencer. They're always together over the holidays, or maybe that headhunter guy at his company in California came through with another consultant offer."

"He can't do that," Danny insisted. "Besides Spencer was supposed to be spending the week in Cabo San Lucas with Hailey instead, and Jamie would never be happy as a full time corporate legal pencil pusher, anyway. Do you think he'd move that far away from the family now?"

"I didn't get that from Eddie," Linda admitted as she thought about that aspect. "She would have been more upset because she loves that house, especially with the baby coming and he's still pushing her to be a detective. I don't think they talked about what was after. Jamie's still feeling the effects of the meds. He might not be thinking straight; that's why your Dad put him off."

"Still not buying that," Danny insisted as an extended lay on the horn outside reminded him of another duty that was growing in urgency. "Listen, I'm gonna go up there and see my brother tonight after work, okay? I wanna find out what this is all about and I'll ask him about what we talked about before, alright? Love you," he added as he leaned over and kissed his wife.

"Love you more," Linda added with a small smile now that more of the air was cleared between them as she watched her husband hurry outside where he happened to catch his next-door neighbor's eye as they both exited their houses at the same time.

"Hey, Larry!… Next time you light M80s off in the back yard I'm gonna have you booked for disturbing the peace no matter what night it is, New year's Eve or not!" Danny yelled across the yard. "Possession of any fireworks is illegal in New York," he cited. "Fine's $250 unless you've got stuff valued over $50 bucks, then you've just committed a Class B misdemeanor and get banged for up to $500. You want that on your record?"

"What, r'you still drunk, Reagan?" Larry Mitchell shouted back. "Lighten up! Me and the wife weren't even home the other night! She gotta certificate in the mail for a free steak dinner and half price drinks to watch the ball drop down at that new joint down on Elmhurst and dragged me to it. Wound up spending fifty bucks anyway 'cause they just double the price on everything else. Didn't get home until two, so stick that in your citation book, _detective._ Probably y'er own two brats that done it, considering they like to sit out here and make noise!" he snarled while continuing his tirade against the know-it-alls in a certain privileged cop family before getting in his car and driving off.

"Dad! We didn't do anything!" Sean immediately became defensive as he was currently sweating the fact they were going to be late for school, anyway. "Me and Jack just stayed downstairs all night like Mom told us! Mr. Mitchell's never liked us anyway because of Grandpa's job!"

"I know, Sean," Danny assured his youngest as he sighed while silently berated himself for becoming unglued with the neighbor which would surely come back to bite him in the ass at some point given his contentious history with the man. "But if he didn't, I wonder who did?" he muttered with renewed unease as he had a tingling sense his home had been subtly targeted again. Obviously whoever was behind this Blue Templar stuff was not shy about bringing it to Staten Island given the fact that the badge had been tossed here. Would they really do something as juvenile as light fireworks under his bedroom window? "Now you're seeing stuff that's not there. Probably just stupid neighborhood kids like he said," he decided instead, a little annoyed at himself for worrying about something so trivial even if it had set him off and brought back that damn nightmare that had haunted him through the years.

"Dad! We're gonna be so late!" Jack griped angrily. "C'mon! I've got homework to turn in first period. We'll have detention after school now and it's not our fault!"

"Right, I'll tell Sister Agnes it was official police business," Danny conceded with a pit in his stomach as he got in the car and turned the key before deciding that maybe a call to his CO to beg off for a few hours and an immediate trip to North Manhattan after he dropped off the boys and smoothed things over with a certain nun was more in order.

###

"So, I gotta 'nother bit of advice for you, Ice," Quincy offered as he continued to regale his new roommate with unsolicited counsel from the chair on his side of the room while the two had a few minutes to become accustomed to sharing the same space in a double together after Jamie had been moved to his new ward earlier in the morning.

"Is that Q-tip number six or seven, already?" Jamie quipped from where he was resting in bed, and although he was a bit tired from the hustle bustle of the move which had been bookended by a few trips to radiology for updated x-rays, scans and various other things, it was exceptionally comforting to have upbeat direct company at a time when his nerves were a little frazzled with the thought of the upcoming rehab session, slated to start later than normal on this day following the holiday week while all the patients were being brought back up to speed up on their clinical tests by a full staff.

"Only up to four, probie," Quincy reminded in an amused huff before continuing to espouse his knowledge. "Pay attention for once, will ya? Combat breathing."

"Combat breathing?"

"Yeah, you breathe in for four seconds… one… two… three… four... and out for four seconds. Rinse, repeat, simple as that," he advised. "You get oxygen exchange and give your mind a chance to like, you know bring it down a notch. Try it. I can see you've got yourself wound too tight about what's going on today, and if you feel like that..."

"Try breathing?"

"You got it, man."

###

"C'mon, Reagan… BREATHE!" was all Danny heard while his heart clenched and panic level instantly soared as he turned the corner of the large, well-equipped rehab room located on the level underneath Kenzie's clinical wards. His already triggered anxiety had not been quelled by an impatient wait of more than an hour before receiving special permission from the sympathetic doctor herself to enter at what was supposed to be the very end of the normally closed session only to find the staff gone and a small group of men surrounding and staring down in a familiar fashion at a still form laying face up on one of the large therapy mat platforms where no doubt after everything else his brother was now in some sort of mortal distress.

"IN!" Quincy coached once more in a quiet, determined voice from his seat in the wheelchair near Jamie's head. "One… two… three… four… and OUT! Two… three.. four… Clear your mind and make it happen now or we're both gonna have to pay!"

"Hey! What the hell's going on here?" Danny demanded as he instantly pushed his way in and ignored all clues at to what was actually happening. "Get off of him and give him some air! This isn't some kind of show! Kid, what's happening? He can't _breathe?_ Don't you know he just had pneumonia! Why isn't someone else helping him?" he added angrily while noting his brother lay completely flat on his back with his eyes closed and a small foam roller wedged under the hinged knee brace which was no longer locked straight and actually bent at a slight angle for the first time.

"Danny?" Jamie started as they flicked open and he came out of his concentrated state while looking up in confusion. "What are you doing here? What's the matter?"

"I'm askin' the same effing thing!" his older brother shot back, uncharacteristically flustered and in truth a little wild-eyed as the vision in his dream morphed and stared back up at him somewhat in shock although instead of a blank, dead expression with the thick, red blood seeping out of numerous bullet wounds there were only sharp, flashing hazel eyes with obvious bands of perspiration from exertion soaking through Jamie's plain gray t-shirt.

"Huh?" his younger brother continued to puzzle as he couldn't remember the last time he had seen Danny looking so crazed and unbalanced since… well since Linda had been rushed passed them both on a gurney headed for surgery after having been shot in the hospital. "One of the guys here bet me I couldn't do five more reps of lifting my heel off the mat at the end of the session, and he was right… my leg crapped out after three," Jamie frowned. "Quince was just trying to get me through it. He said he could otherwise we'd both make the circus list."

"A circus with the… kid, do you even hear yourself?!" Danny railed as he glanced around the small, now somewhat annoyed circle of faces. "He's a cop! Not a soldier! Why don't you let the actual PT guy tell him what he should be doing so he doesn't hurt himself worse?"

"It's just called a circus, man… extra reps to get him better," one of the others insisted referring to the additional calisthenics required when a task wasn't accomplished or you didn't measure up to a challenge.

"I know what an effing circus is!" his brother retorted as he turned his attention back down to Jamie. " _I_ was the Marine, remember? _I_ was ready for this kind of training, not you… you were the kid that went to Harvard, spent a semester your Junior year overseas in some ivy tower studying abroad and threw that away to be a cop! You don't need to be part of this too!"

"Everyone here makes the circus list," Quincy frowned and spoke up with more than a hint of recognition at Danny's reaction as the other select men around him nodded. "The ones that want to get better do, anyway. You did real good today, Ice," he assured before backing his chair up as this was not the time or place in his estimation for any sort of confrontation without some more recon. "You failed that last part, but at least you tried, and if you keep your head down and push through it, you'll come out stronger on the other side. Remember that when I'm down here with you tomorrow bitching about doing extra pull ups. Catch you later back in the room," he added before departing. "Me and the boys here were just going."

"Oh, so that's nice… great, they just bug out and leave you here laying on the ground in a puddle all by yourself," Danny fumed as he pulled Jamie's wheelchair over to the side of the platform and prepared to help his brother into it. "C'mon, get up! You're a sweated mess and you're just getting over being sick… you need to get cleaned up. What am I gonna do with you?"

"Danny, what the hell?" Jamie snapped as he shrugged off the hand on his shoulder. "Those guys _were_ just trying to help me! Today was tough and I'll admit I was kind of scared at first, but they got me through it… how is it you can turn something like that into a bad thing? You're not even supposed to be here this early!" he griped while pushing himself into a sitting position and grimacing a bit as he readjusted his brace before sliding over to the edge of the mat and reaching for the wheelchair. "I can do it by myself!" he insisted when his brother hovered with every intent not to let that happen.

"Yeah, well… you sure seem to think you can do everything on your own all of a sudden," Danny bit back as he steadied Jamie with hands around his shoulders anyway as he transferred over to the chair. "You and I need to talk," he added, bound and determined to find out what exactly his little brother was hiding with this sudden suspicious resignation strategy.

"About what?"

"About what?" Danny repeated as he spun the chair around and put his hands on his hips. "Are you forgetting who you're dealing with? Nice try. You might be able to get it past Dad and Eddie with those big sad puppy dog eyes, but you're not fooling me, Harvard. I know you're up to something. Now, spill!"

* * *

 _Well, Danny's figured out that there's something behind Jamie's switch in focus, or has he? Maybe the tables will be turned on the great older detective when his actions raise their own suspicions as little brother catches on to the fact that there's more going on behind his back than anyone else has let on. Perhaps Detective Eddie will be deployed on her own reconnaissance mission as her husband seeks the truth now on two fronts._

 _I'm sort of glad we had a big Danny/Linda moment in this chapter after the big shocker of the Season 8 premiere. Wow, that really puts a different twist on things doesn't it? So there's a pretty big arc involving them in this story and the next which is already pre-written, so have no fear, we'll still see a lot of Linda here in this series, at least for the time being before I decide exactly how to handle her character going forward._

 _For all those affected by the tragedy in LV yesterday, my heart breaks for you... so many wonderful people it seems were lost for no reason._


	82. Chapter 82

Chapter 82

"So where'd you brother serve?" Quincy fished for information late that afternoon back in the room while things were quiet before Eddie's expected arrival for her first visit with Jamie in several days… a point at which he intended to make himself scarce. "He said he was a Marine," he offered by way of explanation.

"Oh, um... Fallujah mostly after a few months on standby," Jamie answered absentmindedly as he tried his best to relax and ignore the soreness in his muscles that was making itself known after weeks of near inactivity. "Two tours starting back at the end of '02 and he went into Iraq with the first units in March '03. Enlisted almost a year after 9/11 and took a sabbatical from the department," he explained. "It was personal after what happened here and it ate at him for a while before he decided. He was one of the first responders and my old man was in the North Tower before it came down. He worked the pile for days afterwards. Dad and Pop both served in the Corps too, so he felt obligated I guess."

"That so," Quincy mused as he established a timeline in his head. "I was almost ten when it happened... was playing hookie from school that day and watched it on the couch with my Gram. How 'bout you?"

"Going on sixteen," Jamie answered. "Danny had just turned twenty-six by the time he first went over. Played big brother to a bunch of younger guys in his unit," he chuckled. "The oldest of four kids; I guess he's a natural."

"I bet," his newfound buddy added with intent. "Seems real protective of you… not too keen on letting you play with me and the other boys here."

"Oh, that," Jamie brushed off the events of earlier that day and his brother's somewhat rude comments given the circumstances. "Yeah, that's the way he is sometimes… I'm the baby of the family. You know how that goes."

"No, not really." Quincy admitted. "Only child... at least I think so anyway. Mom dumped me on my Grandma's doorstep one night then OD'd in the bathroom of a dive bar when I was still in diapers. Never knew my dad; probably did the same thing. Gram passed on two years ago from a heart attack and she was my only blood family left that I know of. Pretty sure my current situation didn't help… too much stress on her after what happened to me over there. Hate that she was alone too at the end while I was bouncing around the country from hospital to hospital. Been just me and my brothers in arms since then."

"I'm sorry," Jamie frowned as he considered that kind of loneliness in so many of the same cases he had come across while working with Rick on the EDP committee and the reason why his roommate had no other visitors. "That's rough. Danny's always called me the golden boy," he added with guilt over the easier path his own life in a close-knit family had in store at first. "Mom kept me on the lawyer path and straight into Harvard. After she died from cancer and my brother Joe got killed in the line of duty, I decided to follow the family business and went into the police academy instead. Last year at this time I was surfing in California and proposing to my girlfriend on the beach," he offered. "Our little girl Kaylin… she's only three and lost her birth parents to drugs too though," he added without getting into the details. "Eddie and I finalized her adoption right after Christmas, but she's still dealing with it and all this hasn't helped," he admitted sadly. "She's actually been clinging to Danny since it happened… even when I was at home. This stuff," he motioned to his leg and the brace. "Scares her. Her mom wasn't the best, and she saw her die when they were both in a car accident so I guess me being like this reminds her of that and she's been acting out. Gonna take some work to make her forget… Eddie wants us to take her to a shrink, but I hate to go that far. She's got one of those eidetic memories where she can't let go of things too easily so it makes it hard."

"She probably won't do that then," Quincy informed although he was speaking about more than just Kaylin's memories. "Forget about it completely, I mean. Things like that stay with you and tend to pop up every so often. Better to learn to deal with them than pretend they don't matter or exist," he sighed as he thought back to some of his own ghosts that tended to circle around once in awhile. "Bring her here sometime; I like kids… gotta way with them. Spent enough time in therapy myself over the years… bet I could get her over some of it. Speaking of which, your brother ever get help for his PTSD?" he questioned although he could already guess the answer.

"Danny?" Jamie was a little startled that the conversation had circled back to his brother as he glanced over with a puzzled look at Quincy's bluntness. "He, um… well, he's not really into all that talking through your feelings stuff. Dad tried to get him to see someone, but he dealt with it. What you saw today, that's just how he is," he defended while thinking of the long conversation held with his brother after his rehab session which had seen Danny eventually reveal Linda's loss and offer a plea for some legal counsel regarding the Marcus situation. "He's just got a lot on his plate right now, and me getting hurt didn't help."

"I know what I saw today, Ice," Quincy replied firmly while content to back away just a bit for now. "He's harboring something from the past, and I know you've been having nightmares over what happened too. I just don't wanna see you go down that path, so you talk to me or Rigs if you got no one else who understands or is willing to listen, okay? He told me to tell you that even though he hasn't been around too much the past week... he's not feeling great since he caught that bug."

"Yeah, I noticed he looks kinda off. Is he all right?" Jamie worried and considered the fact that Agent Sisco had cornered him in the elevator once more that morning on one of his trips down for imaging and informed him that things were set to move quickly against Oliver Wendell now that the FDA approval was deemed to be on the fast track after a successful report so his number one priority was immediately to reconnoiter the Commander and discover the reason for his presence here since his exclusion from the study, lack of documentation over his condition, if there was one, and constant nightly roaming had drawn the rapt attention of the higher ups in the FBI. The fact that Kenzie appeared to have purposefully installed Rigs here to do that had cast a deep suspicion on the good doctor herself. "I mean, what's really wrong with him?" he questioned directly since it seemed like a natural query. Perhaps he was already in a safe position to do that and the faster he could clear this up, the better for all involved.

"Busted his shoulder a while back in the middle of demonstrating something and it's not been healing right, I guess," Quincy revealed honestly without really providing the needed intel. "Took a bullet there on one of his early tours that stayed put and it stiffens up on him once in awhile. Figured he was trying to get Kenzie to fix it so it didn't interfere with him keeping up with the newbies starting his camp this summer. Rigs isn't really one to get into that personal stuff though, 'specially when he sees it as a sign of weakness," he added with a clear warning. "Kinda like a wounded grizzly that way… doesn't like to be crossed and can take you down with one swipe if you piss him off. I only know 'cause I was dumb enough to ask once after I seen the scars and he musta been in a good mood that day."

"Yeah, I get that," Jamie admitted as that disclosure did little to offer a good enough explanation to clear the Commander or his doctor by proxy, although for the life of him he couldn't imagine this seemingly intensely patriotic man would ever do something in any way, shape or form that would go against the country he had fought for and professed to love. He was still pondering that truth and trying to configure a plan to get Rigs to open up to him without drawing suspicion when he heard Quincy let out a low catcall whistle.

" _Damn,_ Reagan," his roommate offered in a familiar fashion with a nod to the doorway and Jamie's eyes instantly lit up as he spotted Eddie entering the hall through the far doors while engaged in a deep conversation with Kenzie before breaking off and hurrying their way. His wife had obviously pulled out all the stops for this long-awaited visit and was dressed just a tad seductively in tight black pants and boots with a somewhat revealing maroon v-neck blouse that hugged her in all the right places and accentuated her baby-related changes including an enhanced rack as she called it and a now fully evident belly bump. Her long blond tresses were down and softly curled to frame everything to perfection. "She's yours, right?" Quincy whispered. "You remember when you're in a tough spot and it takes a hundred and fifty percent of all you've got to keep going, you gotta focus on something to motivate you to live. If I had someone like that waiting for me at home, I'd come back from the dead too."

"Hey, eyes up!" Jamie ribbed goodnaturedly even as his heart thudded and his gaze was nowhere else since just the sight of her after an absence of a few days excited him more than anyone else had ever done and he vowed to do his best to get back on his feet and clear up this mess here as soon as possible so he could go home to her again. "She's spoken for."

"Well, I gotta do something 'cause I'm still waiting for that rookie of yours to come visit so I can introduce myself to the future Mrs. Johnson," Quincy reminded for what had to be the tenth time as he had not forgotten about Annabel even after only that brief sighting on the news. "C'mon, you owe me, man. Seriously, I think I'm in love and you're flat out denying me the chance to find out," he added even as he transferred himself to his chair and prepared to let the couple alone. "Brothers don't do that to each other. See? Now, I'm gonna go check on Rigs and shoot some hoops," he offered with a wry grin as he wheeled himself towards the hall. "Just hang something on the doorknob if you want me to stay out," he kidded.

"Hi, Quincy!" Eddie greeted as she met him at the doorway with a friendly, relieved smile after receiving good news from Kenzie who had affirmed that Jamie had indeed done as well as could be expected on his first day in rehab and his scans from earlier in the morning had shown promising results with the pneumonia essentially cleared already. "Hey, you don't have to leave. Jamie and I can go sit down in the visitor's area," she added, suddenly relishing the idea that her husband finally appeared to be on the mend and was becoming more mobile so no longer strictly confined to bed.

"Oh no, it's okay... don't want to be a third wheel," Quincy offered amicably as he skillfully spun his chair around to demonstrate the irony of that statement. "I got people to see and places to go. You two kids have fun," he grinned before adding over his shoulder on the way out. "Not too much though, he's got a circus to get ready for tomorrow."

"He's got a what?" Eddie puzzled as she watched the other man leave chuckling to himself before turning back to her husband and closing the door behind her for some privacy. "Huh? Am I missing something?"

* * *

 _Well, Quincy really zeroed in on Danny there, and got Jamie thinking didn't he? This was originally one long chapter combined with the next, but it was a bit much for one read as we're covering a lot of ground next time so we're going to follow Cupcake's advice and chunk it into two as our lovebirds continue their visit. I'd love to post some more bonus chapters, but family life is busy right now with work and two_ _active kids in high school sports and writing time is limited so I'm still working on the next section which bridges to the end of this one._


	83. Chapter 83

Chapter 83

" _Oh no, it's okay... don't want to be a third wheel," Quincy offered amicably as he skillfully spun his chair around to demonstrate the irony of that statement. "I got people to see and places to go. You two kids have fun," he grinned before adding over his shoulder on the way out. "Not too much though, he's got a circus to get ready for tomorrow."_

" _He's got a what?" Eddie puzzled as she watched the other man leave chuckling to himself before turning back to her husband and closing the door behind her for some privacy. "Huh? Am I missing something?"_

* * *

"Inside joke, never mind him… not important," Jamie covered and completely put everything else out of his mind as he met her with bright, flirty eyes for the first time since the accident. "For me?" he questioned with a sideways smile as he raised his eyebrows with a deliberate look down below eye level to the point of her low neckline while holding out his hand. "C'mere, Detective Lambchop," he begged knowing from their brief phone conversation earlier that her first day up in the squad had been everything she had hoped for and more.

"Yes, for you," she laughed at the fact that he had noticed her efforts and joined him by sitting on the bed and reaching in for a long, extended kiss which included some further playful touching as their reconnection efforts continued. "Hmm, that was nice, Mr. Reagan," she acknowledged with deep satisfaction as she cuddled in when they finally broke apart. "I missed you. Wasn't sure how much incentive you would need to stay awake after your busy day so I thought I would pad things in my favor… not like I need too much help in that department right now," she admitted with a pat on her expanded chest before adding hopefully. "Dr. Kenzie said you did pretty good today? Are you sore?"

"A little," he admitted. "And if by doing good she meant I achieved the advanced state of laying flat on my ass on the mat with a whopping fifteen percent bend in my knee… well then yeah, I was a rockstar," he added with a shrug. "I was able to lift it a bit a few times on my own before the muscles gave out and Aaron said we were done… did some other stuff on my good arm and leg so it's a start, I guess. Most of the incisions are healed so he can finally get more aggressive with the stretching and exercises."

"How about below?" she asked and went immediately for the elephant in the room.

"More feeling down lower… maybe a twinge once in awhile in my foot. Not much else yet. Kenzie said the nerve test was better down there today though and I should be able to start moving it soon, but Ed, it might not ever be the way it was…" he trailed off before forcing out something more realistic in front of his wife. "I mean I might have to sell the Mustang if it doesn't," he admitted sadly. "I told Aaron one of my long-term goals was to drive stick again. He said he couldn't promise that… just gotta be patient and see how much control I get back."

"Okay, then we'll do that… be patient I mean even though you know it's not one of my strong points," Eddie whispered back with a frown knowing how much that car meant to Jamie and the freedom it represented before offering another hug and a kiss. "I love you so much, and we're all going to get through this, okay?" she assured as he nodded. "It was so hard staying away and not seeing you all this time while you were sick, but you look pretty good considering," she added as a worried glance revealed decent color in his face and she was heartened to see that his overall demeanor was much more relaxed and positive than it had been previously at home, even if it was painful to admit that. "It must be better having Quincy around for company after not having any visitors for a few days."

"Yeah, he's great... although not a huge fan of my big brother, apparently," Jamie revealed as he segued into a new topic with that vast understatement. "Danny was by earlier when I was coming out of rehab and they sort of got into it a little again."

"Why?" Eddie asked with concern as she had purposefully kept the Staten Island Reagan's problems under the radar with an intent to speak about it in person. "I mean he was here already? Why did they get into it? Quincy seems so easy-going."

"I don't know. Danny kinda wigged out for some reason when he saw me down on the ground," he revealed. "Quince and a couple of the others took offense when he yelled at them… you know how he can be and they're not the type to take it. He hates the fact that I'm hanging around with these guys."

"Yeah, well I still don't really get that, but in his defense I know your brother's been kind of… stressed about some other stuff lately," she trailed off with a grimace and raised eyebrows although given the look returned she immediately knew it was no secret anymore. "I was gonna talk to you about all that tonight, I swear, but I guess he got here first. I just didn't know how to say it over the phone."

"Yeah… it was a shock," Jamie murmured as he pulled her closer and put an arm around her shoulder so they were sitting on the bed side-by-side in a familiar way. "I would have never guessed it was them in Dr. Geisner's office with you that day, and now I feel even worse about taking it out on him. How's Linda?" he wondered. "Danny said she was a lot better after she talked to you? I'm really glad you could help her."

"Well, mom and I didn't do much more than just listen," Eddie admitted as she put her feet up and comfortably crossed them over. "I guess that was enough."

"You must have done more than that. Danny was here asking me about adoption rules and legal stuff… he said Linda's pretty interested in pursuing that thing with Marcus's baby now."

"Really? Oh, that's good," Eddie sighed in relief as she reached over and pulled his hand over her own belly, feeling at ease in their own family closeness now, just missing one little sweetness who had agreed to come visit her daddy to deliver oatmeal cookies along with Grandpa Henry later in the week. "I wasn't sure which way she would go on that… it was crazy that he brought it up in the first place, but I guess she's had some time to think about it since she was over at our house."

"They're talking," Jamie revealed as he relaxed back and likewise enjoyed this modified earlier-than-normal chitchat time with her which never failed to bring them closer as a couple and remind him of when they first became friends and partners. "Danny wants Marcus to stay involved… I guess she's not too keen on that, not that I blame her," he frowned with unveiled contempt for the onetime rookie that had seen him nearly pull his hair out on the job multiple times. "The birth mom says she's willing to sign over her rights to him, so that's a good thing… for them, I guess. Just depends if Marcus is willing to do the same," he finished while softly caressing their own little expected bump. "Linda's not looking for a threesome so that could be a deal breaker."

"I don't know how anyone can go through this and give their munchie away," Eddie sniffed as she likewise stared down at her belly thoughtfully and wondered how their beloved little bean was doing as the next follow up ultrasound and the threat of a needed trip to Boston afterwards was looming in just two-day's time. "Even Marcus. I would die first before losing her, Jamie… I really would."

"I know, lambchop… me too. Not everyone is in that same place though. This girl could be scared and alone, or..."

"Just plain selfish and irresponsible like Marcus is," Eddie finished with disdain evident in her voice. "It's a match made in heaven with those two, and whoever she is… if she's planning on being a cop too she should get assigned to my car for a ride along," she huffed. "Your father ought to kick her out of the academy for having such low moral standards before she even gets in there."

"Ed, don't judge… it could turn into a blessing for someone else," he reminded. "Ours did. It's not an easy choice no matter how you look at it, and if Jayne had made a different decision for Kaylin… we might not even be together right now."

"We would always be together, it's fate," she pouted a little at those words and doubled her resolve that their baby would be fine too. "I loved you from that first day outside the precinct, Jamison Reagan, and Kaylin's ours too so we were meant to be a family... I believe that… you and me and our two little girls now, no matter how they came to us. I just hope Linda and Danny want the same thing and can find that again too."

"I hope he can handle something else like this right now. I'm kinda worried about him," Jamie admitted as he squeezed Eddie's hand tight and thought about the conversation he had with his older brother that day. "He wasn't right when he was here, Ed… tried to make it about me quitting the force even when I told him it was for the best so I could focus more on moving forward and getting better," he informed her with continued forced optimism without revealing that his brother had been dead on about that before continuing, "but there's something else going on with him; I know it. He was acting paranoid about stuff and had this look…" he trailed off with a pause. "I haven't seen it since Joe died. Quincy thinks Danny has PTSD he never dealt with and my getting hurt and winding up here's triggering it again," he added with misguided guilt. "What if he's right?"

"Whoa, Quincy came out and told you that?" Eddie questioned as she glanced over and contemplated the obvious close friendship her husband had formed with this other man already if he was comfortable bringing up a private family dynamic like that. "I don't know, maybe," she pondered before dropping another nuclear-grade bomb that would have Jamie reevaluating his investigative priorities and eventually glad to have a direct, private line into the FBI. "I mean I don't personally know what he was like before when he came home from over there, but Danny's definitely been catching flack from your Dad too on top of what's going on here and with Linda… something about a badge he found on the street by his house. He tried to get it back to whoever it belonged to without turning it in like he should have and it wound up being flagged right up to the Chief of D's so he got called up there on the hot seat to explain. Frank said it was a bad luck number anyway and ought to be retired permanently," she revealed. "I guess it was issued to a Detective Lydia Gonsalves at one point. Do you know her? Seemed like they did," she added with no knowledge of what harm just the mention of that name might do before growing concerned when she immediately felt her husband go rail stiff next to her as even his hand on top of hers went instantly cold. "Jamie! Are you okay? Is something wrong?"

"W-what? No..." he managed to stutter out even as his mind blanked in complete shock at hearing that name again from his own wife's lips of all places as all the corresponding images from his clandestine meetings over the Blue Templar with Lydia and her twin sister rushed through his mind on fast forward. "M-my leg's cramping is all," he covered almost perfectly on autopilot as that would certainly explain his reaction. "Aaron said that w-would probably happen a lot at first."

"Funny, Danny had almost the same look when he heard that… like he saw a ghost, especially when I told him that was the name on the cat at Kaylin's school, but your dad explained to me later some other detective had that number the last few years and he's in trouble with IA so I guess that's what it was all about," Eddie informed innocently as Frank had made every effort to keep her in the dark about what was going on behind the family scenes. Nonetheless, she had managed to offer another unexpected hit that threatened to send Jamie's blood pressure skyrocketing as she moved over and attempted to help. "That must really hurt, can I rub it for you?"

"Give me a minute," he gritted as he struggled to come up to speed with the fact that his brother's problems had been apparently compounded by more than just his own accident and suddenly that recent Danny Reagan spate of pig-headed overprotectiveness took on a whole new meaning that had nothing to do with PTSD as his now clearer mind whirred ahead and began to connect the dots. "Wait, the cat?"

"Yeah, on the collar's tag. It said Gonsalves too, but the number was no good when we called. I meant to tell you before; it wasn't important… was it?"

"No, um… why would it be?" he swallowed hard as his heart was pounding trying to put these jagged pieces in place and formulate a plan to talk his way out of coming clean on any of this with his wife while at the same time getting her to divulge everything she knew so he could figure out just what the hell was going on and what his brother was up to.

"Well it's just that it happened the same day you…" Eddie paused as she had her finger right on a key reality without even knowing it. "The same day you got hit by the car. I know it's silly to think it was some kind of weird coincidence, but Kaylin was so upset and you were hurt the same way so I just didn't want to bring it up. Is the cramp getting better?" she fretted over his still-pained look. "Are you getting enough potassium? You should try to eat more bananas 'cause Marguerite said that can help…"

"S'okay," he interrupted with an assurance as he reached out for her hand once more. "It's going away now. I'm just really worried about Danny," he repeated that fact once more as he knew that would grab her attention. "He's got so much going on and nobody else is looking out for him," he hinted as he tried to steer her towards becoming involved and turning the tables on his brother to gather more intel. "I sort of shut him down about finding the guy that did this to me, Linda and the boys have been upset with him plus now you said he's on the outs with Dad and I know he won't go to Erin."

"I wouldn't say he's on the outs," Eddie hemmed. "I mean they do seem to have some kind of tension between them, but they're still okay… and I don't think you really shut him down about catching the guy who hit you. Linda says he's still obsessed about it… she was worried."

"Well, he finally stopped asking me about why I was still seeing the Chevelle," Jamie edged and considered the fact that his father was probably already in the loop so it was just him in the dark. "So I think he's accepted the fact that I can't remember and gave up."

"You know, I think maybe he's still trying to rule it out just to give you peace of mind. I told him I wouldn't say anything, but he asked for that old car manual you had in your desk last week," she explained. "Said it was for another case so he could look up part numbers, but I know he wasn't telling me the truth… I mean what are the odds another one of those would show up?"

"Yeah," Jamie swallowed hard as suddenly another image hit him… the Chevelle he had passed on the road near the storage facility last fall on his birthday while he was rushing on his way to the family home for the great baby bean reveal. "What are the odds?" he asked and was suddenly torn between his duty and physical need to be here at Columbia and something that was starting to smell very much like the rotten corruption the family Reagan family had faced once before. Maybe it was time to start paying attention to what his own mind had been screaming at him all along, drugs or no drugs.

"Listen, lambchop… can you practice those super duper investigative skills and find out what's really going on with him?" Jamie asked, figuring that his older sibling would never see anything like that coming from Eddie's standpoint. "I mean, I'd do it from here if I could, but Quincy made some good points about the way Danny's acting and I just want to make sure he's okay," he pleaded.

"You want me to snoop on your brother? The great Detective Daniel Fitzgerald Reagan? Is that even allowed in your family?" Eddie puzzled before one coy eyebrow went up and she eagerly accepted the challenge as the partnership she held with her husband remained fast.

"Done."

"Eddie," Jamie warned as he wondered just what kind of pandora's box he had opened up.

"How about just keeping it low-key?" he encouraged. "Maybe nose around with Linda or Maria and see if you can get any more info on why he wanted to know about the car… that's all."

"Yes, sir, Sergeant Reagan… copy that. I will confine my investigation to just the car facts and nothing else before I report back," she laughed and stood up to salute him before pausing suddenly, doubling over forward a bit to lean on the bed as a blank expression of shock swept over her face while one hand immediately went back down to her belly.

"Ed… Eddie, honey, what's wrong?" Jamie panicked as he sat up instantly and everything else was wiped from his mind while he feared something had just happened to the pregnancy and their beloved little bean. "Is it the baby?!"

"I think... it is," she replied back with a gasp as he held his breath before a long, daresay pregnant pause gave way to a huge smile and she looked back up with her eyes shining. "I felt a flutter… there it is again! Oh, Jamie! She _kicked_ me!" Eddie explained as a wave of emotion and much-needed hope came over them both that Wednesday's appointment would go well and gave them reason to cuddle and enjoy the next few hours together before setting about separately once more on their respective missions. "How cool is that? Our munchie is saying hi to us! I'm so glad it happened for the first time when I was here with you!"

"Sixteen weeks, right on target," Jamie enthused at first though admittedly a little disappointed he would not be able to feel that for himself for another month or so.

"That's our little avocado!"

* * *

 _Well, things are definitely looking up a bit for Jamie and Eddie, at least in a few areas even as some of the pieces are falling into place that will put our favorite brothers together in peril at a familiar bridge. Next though, our hero decides to let out a little pent up frustration and takes a deliberate tact to poke the bear and see how Rigs will react while Eddie makes a startling discovery before arriving at her appointment to hear if a trip to Boston without her husband is in order._


	84. Chapter 84

Chapter 84

"Mom, c'mon! We're gonna be late!" Eddie urged impatiently from the driver's seat in the driveway of the home on Driftwood Way as Eva struggled momentarily with Kaylin's buckles trying not to chip her fresh manicure while she tucked the little girl safely into her car seat before the two women could drop her off at preschool class and head to St. Vic's for another ultrasound appointment with Dr. Geisner.

"Edit, I will not be rushed; it is not ladylike and we are well within our needed time. Isn't that right my kislány," her mother chided as her signature heels clicked on the pavement while she finished attending to her granddaughter before climbing into the passenger side of the vehicle, dressed to the nines in a familiar Eva Janko fashion as she was off to a third day at her new position at the real estate agency in Park Slope directly afterwards and certainly looked the part of a successful upscale business manager once more.

"Nagyanya so pretty," Kaylin confirmed from her perch in the back. "Mommy dress same to work all time," she noted Eddie's dry cleaned uniform hanging on the opposite side of the backseat as she was likewise heading to her post upstairs at the 12th afterwards where she would continue to stick out like a blue bunned thumb among the more professional looking business-attired detective squad members there.

"Well, maybe not for much longer, sweetness," Eddie explained as she carefully backed out of the driveway and headed for the school. "After the baby comes Mommy wants to be a detective like Uncle Danny, and then I'll get to wear nice clothes every day instead of those pants that make me look like a twelve-year-old boy dressing up like a cop for Halloween..." she trailed off before suddenly jerking the car off to the side of the street and pulling up to the curb in a sudden stop while staring left out of her window.

"Mommy!" Kaylin whimpered in fear as she always did whenever there was an unexpected maneuver in a vehicle.

"Edit! What is wrong? You've frightened her! Now see what you've done!" Eva complained as she noticed that a small bit off coffee had sloshed out of her travel mug and splattered on her overcoat. "It is alright kicsikém, we are fine," she comforted the little girl behind her. "Your Anya just needed to stop. Is the car failing again? Jamison will insist you sell it back this time."

"No, Mom, look!" Eddie insisted as she pointed to the side. "Do you know what that is?" she demanded as her brow wrinkled. "This makes no sense!"

"Mit akarsz tőlem? What is it you want me to say?" Eva glanced over with irritation before continuing to fuss over her stained jacket with a wipe from the console as she shook her head. "Edit, are you feeling ill? I have worked with realtors for many years. That is a sign indicating the property is for sale. Of course I know what it is!"

"But it's that Mason Lockwood's house!" Eddie indicated towards the now once again vacant-looking Cape Cod that had stood empty on the street for several months the summer before. "That strange, nosy man who asked you about the ramp. He just moved here a few months ago!"

"And now he has decided it is not to his liking and has gone elsewhere," Eva chattered back uninterestedly. "It happens often, and this is as you say a free country, correct? You and Jamison held something against him so it is a relief that he has gone and you will no longer have to worry over it anymore. Now if we do not get Kaylin to school on time or to your appointment, it will be on you to explain to the teacher and your doctor why we were delayed."

"I guess you're right, Mom," Eddie sighed before putting the car back into gear and proceeding down the street. "I just wonder where he went," she added nervously with a final glance at the light blue for-sale sign in the rear view mirror.

###

"Well, if this isn't a sight," Rigs chastised in a rough-sounding voice after being MIA for a few more days as he entered the nearly empty rehab room and sat down somewhat heavily to observe with interest from a chair off to the side. "We've got the kid with one leg hanging from the ceiling harness in front of a movie screen tryin' to stand on a bubble without tipping sideways like he spent his entire furlough in the hooch and the one with two legs and the effing nerve to wear his prissy little Ivy League shirt in front of me still in the same spot as when I walked by before... flat on his ass. Can't imagine what I've been missing out on in here."

"Aw, don't pick on him, everyone else in here was doing that all morning before they got dismissed," Quincy advised in the background even as he was struggling to finish his own extra exercises to correct the vestibular impairment issues that had plagued him since the blast that took his leg and left him largely confined to the safety of a wheelchair with intermittent balance problems due to inner ear damage. "We're just finishing up with some extra stuff. I think he knew it was gonna be a double sugar cookie kind of day for both of us so he decided to dress the part early, isn't that right, Ice?" he questioned and looked over Jamie who was gritting his teeth in a deliberate display of frustration and once again laying on the mat platform. "Besides, give him cred for not being someone who's afraid to stand out from the crowd in here," he added while noting his buddy's rather conspicuous appearance among the other men normally in the room as he was dressed comfortably in his distinctive maroon Harvard tee that Eddie had brought from home, albeit puzzled at the request from her husband given the previous history with the Marines and his blanket, versus the more subdued and muted hues of greens, grays and fatigues preferred by the others. "Takes guts to do that."

"Doing that on the front line gets you shot first," Rigs quipped as his eyes narrowed as he tried to figure out the motivation behind this. In the brief few minutes he had visited with Jamie through the glass when he was in isolation he had the sense that something had shifted since the trip home, and although he hadn't had the time to pinpoint the cause yet, whatever it was… he suspected perhaps the situation with the irate brother or the overbearing but concerned mother-in-law from the hallway who was clearly looking for another path for him to take… if today was any indication it was becoming a distraction that could not be tolerated or this Reagan was going to prove to be an unsuccessful subject for Kenzie's study, and he was starting to worry that time might be working against them.

"Always had a target on my back considering who my Pop was and the family I come from so didn't see any reason to change now," Jamie huffed back somewhat irritably and acted as if it was taking all of his concentration and effort to inch a therapy ball back and forth underneath his injured leg as Aaron had directed in an effort to increase his hip mobility considering they made little overt progress anywhere else that morning. Despite his public veneer regarding the decision to stay here full-time and leave the job, he wanted… no _needed_ … some small reminder and comfort of his old life so hence the decision to pull on a soft, familiar shirt even if it opened himself up to ridicule from the rest of the room which was the intended purpose after all, to get the others talking around him so he could glean whatever information he could from them––hell, today in the state he was in it was almost a relief to receive a bit of the familiar brotherly abuse that was deserved. He woke up feeling like a failure as a father and a husband for having forced his wife to face her fears over the baby alone since he could not afford to waste a day in the rehab room under orders from Agent Sisco and was about to amplify that with the guilt of going behind Kenzie's back with a traitorous attempt to get Rigs to reveal the true reason for his presence here.

"Hmm, sounds like one of my star pupils is a wee bit cranky today though," the good doctor herself noted as she joined them and assessed her patient's progress and mental state. "I shouldn't say anything, but I came in to tell the two of you that because of your early results we're well on our way to premarket approval with sale and use grants projected for the matrix process in under twelve months," she beamed as the goals after the past three years of her intensive research work were almost in reach. "I can accept more trauma patients at this stage and my investor actually cracked a smile this morning when we got the call about being fast tracked to licensing. He's anxious to start the marketing strategy and setting up meetings with potential international partners already."

"Ooh-rah, we're gonna be world-wide famous, Ice!" Quincy cheered.

"That's great," Jamie clenched as he considered the ramifications if none of that came to light and he was unable to clear Kenzie from Oliver Wendell's looming legal troubles, especially given those global connections. "Hope it works out."

"Me too," Kenzie frowned as she viewed that rather unenthusiastic response. "Aaron said you were pretty tight today. What's going on?"

"Just another day in paradise," he answered insolently with a sad glance at the wall clock since in spite of the fact that other things needed immediate attention, right now his mind was actually elsewhere. Eddie had probably already left for her all-important appointment with Dr. Geisner and would be arriving at St. Vic's at any moment now accompanied by Eva... his freaking previously non-maternal mommazilla of a mother-in-law for God's sake. As much as he had tried not to let that bother him, especially after the happiness of the little flutters during her visit the other day and the fact that he and Eva had managed to progress to a new stage in their own relationship, that ship had sailed and right now he wasn't in the mood for anything but worry. Top that off with enough time over the course of the past few days to stew over this investigation, plus all that effing stuff about Danny's PTSD, the references to the Blue Templar and the damn cat and Jamie was looking to push the envelope and get to the bottom of whatever was going on here ASAP so that he could get home and fix the rest of his messed up life. Since he had the feeling that being a good little soldier and carrying on wasn't going to get any type of rise out of Rigs anytime soon, he decided to see if he could draw him out and tip the scales by using the tools on his belt today… raw angry emotion which there was plenty of looking for an outlet. What the hell? So far he hadn't come up with any better ideas and given the fact that the Commander was present it actually seemed to be working as planned.

"Where's the pain, Jamie?" the doctor continued to pry though in a misdirected effort to diagnose just what was going on with him. "Is it mental or physical? What's got you looking to pick a fight today?"

Damn, she was good. That's exactly what he intended to do.

"Both," he admitted when it became evident by her stance that Kenzie wasn't going anywhere until she got something out of him. "Hip's still really hurting," he added in an effort to deflect from the guilt over the fact that he was going behind every single person who had gone out of their way to help him in the last few weeks, even Cupcake of course who would probably be the biggest loser in this if Kenzie found herself without the support of Oliver's bottomless bank account before she had time to get Quincy solidly back on two mismatched feet.

"Dull, radiating pain from under where I cut?" Kenzie asked and then continued after he nodded and she leaned down to pull his shirt up a little to examine the area which showed no signs of swelling. "That's expected, and while it's a _literal_ pain in the ass, that will likely continue for another few weeks," she explained. "It probably hasn't changed much lately. You were doing really well down here the past couple of days, so aside from some added soreness I'm guessing the rest of it is mental, right? What's got you bombing out of your exercises today? Out with it."

"Ed's having her next baby checkup this morning," he offered a half truth to cover himself with another glance at the clock. "She'll find out if she has to go to that specialist in Boston without me so my head's just not in it."

"Why? Because you're focusing on the negative aspects of it? You're worried about her because you don't think that she's strong enough to handle something that badass on her own? Jamie, you're getting yourself caught up in everything that could go wrong again and letting that to come back to bite you here," Kenzie surmised.

"He's seeing sharks," Rigs concluded in agreement as he sat back with an air of disgust since that errantly confirmed his original suspicion of family interference. "Can't focus on the mission… too soft up here," he added while tapping his temple.

"Oh, so I'm too soft for caring about what happens to my family?… Not like I haven't heard that all my life!" Jamie snapped back as he intentionally used this excuse to pare for an opening with… what had Quincy called the Commander––a wounded grizzly bear? More like a cold, calculating Great White he decided given the conversation as a pair of green eyes went dead flat and stared back at him. Damn, this was going to be harder, no scratch that _scarier_ than he thought since it went against his nature to be so disrespectful, but if this is what it was going to take, hell, he'd just have to throw some more chum in the water. "What do you know about it, huh? I bet you've never let your wife or baby down that way. Ever been forced to walk away from the job you love? Maybe you just don't know what that feels like!"

"Whoa, dude. Off limits. I warned ya," Quincy turned and spouted with surprise at his roommate's uncharacteristic guff especially given their conversation the other day.

"Everyone has different reasons for being here or doing what they do, son," Rigs replied in a frigid tone while his eyes flashed over ever so briefly with unexpected emotion considering Jamie had hit a very important nail on the head with the reference to his life's calling. "And different people they care about."

"He's right," Kenzie tried to mitigate with a sad glance at the Commander that did not go unnoted. "Look around the room," she gestured. "Almost everyone who was in here today got that way because they were trying to protect someone else. The only problem with always putting other people's needs first is when it makes someone not care or pay attention to their _own,"_ she frowned with emphasis and a directed look that darted between both men that Jamie's sharp eyes picked up on. Clearly she had just put Rigs in the same category so there must be something physically wrong… that sort of slight ashen pallor and weight loss the older man had displayed since his own supposed bout with a fever or the flu last week. Suddenly Jamie's heart thumped as he recognized it from a time in the past when someone else had kept such a secret in an effort to insulate him from the harsh realities of life so he would take care of his own pressing needs without distraction… Mary, his own mother, had laughed it off when he questioned her appearance that Thanksgiving and denied him the knowledge about her sickness so that he would finish out the fall semester at Harvard on top of his class and lined up for the best internship placements the next year. For the first time he contemplated the fact that it was possibly something far more serious than a broken bone and an arm in a sling that was keeping the previously otherwise fit man cloaked like a stealth bomber under the understanding and dedicated doctor's care while still expelling him from the study. Perhaps he didn't want to know the truth after all.

" _Rigs isn't really one to get into that personal stuff though, 'specially when he sees it as a sign of weakness,_ " Quince had warned just the other day.

"It's not right to want to help people or be there for them when they need you… to put them first no matter what?" Jamie questioned on autopilot even as he worried over her continued ability to do just that. "What is it that you do again? How would you feel if you had to give it up?" he added a loaded question to hit that exposed nerve again given the circumstances while for the first time considered Rick's reaction to this… surely his good friend would go off the wall with the fact something like this was threatening Kenzie's career, perhaps her very freedom, while Jamie had this knowledge and had kept it from him. Without a doubt that could put the close relationship he shared with his rescue buddy in jeopardy too given his apparent feelings for this old flame.

"Besides, maybe I can't handle only concentrating on one thing at a time," Jamie edged back in a deliberate, defeated tone that he knew inherently would drive Rigs to seek him out privately for another one of his SEAL pep talks… one in which he could use an old grandfather's interrogation trick of asking a question as if he knew the answer to confirm a suspicion… only in this case he truly feared he already did.

"Maybe that's _exactly_ what you need to do," the Commander concluded on cue before getting up. "Because it seems to me like you've got a bunch of stuff circling around you right now, son… things that don't concern you... and you're never going to get where you want to be if you can't ignore them and focus on what needs to be done. Explain to him about the sharks, Cupcake," he ordered over his shoulder as he walked out of the room. "Make sure he gets it or admit I was right before that taking him on like this was a waste of everyone's time and energy. We'll talk again when he understands that."

* * *

 _Hm, so is Jamie on to something? Perhaps there is a clear reason for Rigs' presence that was not considered before. Next, we'll pick up with Eddie and Eva at Dr. Geisner's office as mommazilla reveals a little more about her past and her daughter discovers exactly what's in her immediate future. A few busy chapters left before we make the jump to the present to see how this all finally plays out on that hillside._


	85. Chapter 85

_Apologies for being off the normal posting schedule and not returning PMs or responding to reviews, but last week was a very sad one in the werks family as we had a big loss, and even though you tell yourself you're prepared for something, when it really happens it feels sudden and you find out that's not the case at all. It's fitting that this is mostly an Eddie and Eva chapter as I am missing my own anya today._

* * *

Chapter 85

"It seems that your appointment will not be on time once more," Eva sighed as she glanced irritably at her watch again. "We are already ten minutes behind and I must be back at the office in Park Slope before noon when the others leave for lunch," she fretted.

"Mom, I told you I was fine… you didn't have to come in here with me today. I know this brings back some bad memories," Eddie tried to sound convincing even though she was admittedly nervous and thankful for the company as the two Janko woman waited alone together in a now-familiar exam room in Dr. Geisner's office Wednesday morning.

"Nonsense, Edit. I assured Jamison I would be with you so that he did not have to worry and miss his rehabilitation time… it is important he remains active now," Eva reminded even as she sat in the corner chair with her arms tightly crossed against the anxious butterflies that were fluttering in her chest. It had been just past this very point in her own first pregnancy that a simple trip to the doctor for a basic checkup had instigated the nightmare of a miscarriage when no heartbeat was found. A promise to her daughter that she would not be alone to hear her own news had outweighed any misgivings she had about coming today, and although she was not religious by nature, Eva was praying very hard at the moment that history would not repeat itself. The only thing that was heartening was the fact Eddie had been over the moon with happiness since reporting those initial tiny flutters that had been felt for the first time while she was with Jamie a few days prior. Surely with that there was no reason to expect anything so dramatic then except perhaps for the fact that this baby was already facing challenges and a worsening condition might just break her daughter's heart in a similar way.

"Did you ever find out why?" Eddie asked softly along that line of thought as she twiddled with the hem on her shirt. "I mean you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to…" she trailed off before continuing after receiving no answer. "I was always afraid to ask before, but it's just that I had to write down all those things when I filled out the paperwork for the genetics testing," she disclosed. "We had to list Jamie's Uncle Peter too… Henry's first son," she explained. "He died of leukemia before he was two. Frank was born the year after."

"I did not know," Eva replied sadly as she considered the somewhat shared experience of her Reagan grandparent counterpart.

"Dr. Geisner wanted to test me first because it was easier… just a simple blood draw. What she was looking for that might be causing the kidney problem is recessive so Jamie and I would both have to carry the gene, and even then there would still only be a twenty-five percent chance the baby would actually have it. It's called Autosomal Recessive Polycystic Kidney Disease. If that's what it is then there's almost a fifty percent chance of… of something really bad where the lungs don't develop," she finished with a deep sigh herself as just saying that out loud took her own breath away.

"No, lány. At that time for me nothing was done… there were no such tests. I went to the hospital later that week after we were told and it was over in a few hours. It was said to go home afterwards, forget and not worry over it… that these things just happen sometimes," she added bitterly. "I asked to see her though… my first kislány… also a little girl, no bigger than your hand," she admitted for the first time. "We decided that day her name would have been Katalin after your father's mother. It is why you share it; he insisted we remember. I did not wish it, but perhaps he was right that we did so."

"Oh, Anya, I never knew that," Eddie admitted as her heart broke for her own mother at that highly personal admission since she was once considered a sort of ice queen among the family in the not so distant past. "I mean I just thought I was named after his baba, not my sister… wow, that seems so strange to say now," she sighed with a hurt look as she acknowledged the loss and empathized. "I'm really sorry, that must have been so hard for you. I never understood before."

"And my hope is that you never will," Eva conceded with a sad smile as she glanced up and regretted the dark turn their conversation had taken given where they were sitting and the news that awaited. "It is in the past now, and we must not think such things. Today we will hear a good result, I am sure of it," she asserted firmly. "Jamison is improving now every day, and you have felt my unoka inside you already, so all will be well… you will see."

"I really hope so, Mom," Eddie replied and wiped away a tear. "Jamie _has_ been better since he went back to Columbia… much more positive this week," she admitted while considering that somewhat puzzling reality given the fact that her husband had decided to keep himself sequestered from the family. "I was really worried when he told me about staying at the hospital and resigning from the department because his family and being a cop is so much a part of what he is, but he seems okay with it now," she pondered now on the same suspicious wavelength as her brother-in-law that Jamie deciding to leave the NYPD had come too soon. "He said he's just looking forward now and he'll decide what direction to go after he's back on his feet and can see what he's capable of. I just don't want whatever happens here today to set him back. If there's any way I don't have to go to Boston without him… I don't want to do it," she revealed.

"It surprised me as well when he agreed to follow his therapy this morning and not insist on staying in his room to listen on the phone while you were here, but I believe his father is right and he has turned the corner, Edit," Eva comforted as unknown to both Jamie was focused on the investigation into Rigs and Kenzie in an effort to resolve that situation as soon as possible before it put her study in peril. "He said as much when I sat with him. I believe he just wants to be well for when the baby is born, but if your doctor says we must travel to see this other specialist, we will go," she asserted. "You must put the health of your beba over everything else, even your husband. It is what a mother must do."

"I will, Mom," Eddie promised as the door opened and she was initially relieved to see her favored sonographer Christine enter with a folder in her hand before her greatest fears were instantly triggered when Dr. Geisner followed behind and quietly closed the door behind her while glancing at her pager which had just gone off.

"Good morning, Eddie, I'm glad to see you again," Christine greeted warmly as was her nature and neither of the Janko women were able to get an instant read from her, although the doctor seemed to share her ease initially so Eva decided to press ahead, impatient now with the wait.

"Eva Janko, Edit's mother," she introduced herself with her hand forward after quickly getting to her feet. "I am here to be with her while Jamison is recovering."

"It's nice to meet you. I'm so sorry to hear about his accident," Christine replied as she sat down at her station and turned on the equipment. "It sure puts my little crunched fender from a few weeks ago in perspective. I apologize for missing your last appointment," she added. "Dr. Geisner just filled me in on what we are looking for."

"Yes, about that…" Eddie stuttered out with a nervous look towards the doctor. "Did you get the results from the blood test back yet?" she asked and managed a few more frantic silent prayers of her own while waiting for the reply.

"Yes we did, just this morning," Dr. Geisner nodded with a small smile and an instant wave of relief flooded the room at the apparent good news given her expression. "I thought we would go over that first and take a quick peek at the baby on the screen while I have a moment before Christine carries on with the detailed measurements. I'm sorry to rush through, but there's a first-time mom in advanced labor upstairs so I might not be able to stay for the whole scan. You will be pleased to know that your karyotyping showed no overt abnormalities, Eddie," she informed while reviewing the paperwork once more. "There is statistically almost zero possibility of the more serious type of inherited polycystic disease playing a role here unless there was a spontaneous genetic mutation which is very unlikely."

"Oh, okay… so that's good, right?" Eddie exhaled in utter relief as that hurdle was overcome even as she was leaning back and pulling up her shirt so that the familiar warmed gel could be applied. "Thank God. I can't wait to tell Jamie."

"And how is papa doing?" Christine asked as she quickly brought the image of the baby up on the screen. "There we go little bouncy one," she smiled as once again the Reagan baby bean was seen in a flurry of activity. "Heart rate normal at 152," she informed and proceeded with the quick initial examination Dr. Geisner had requested.

"He's… he's starting physical therapy now and getting much better," Eddie answered on autopilot even as her eyes were locked on their child while she soaked in every detail. "Mom, come here. Do you see? The baby already looks like Jamie," she stated proudly as Eva had moved over to the side of the table and was now gripping her daughter's hand, likewise entranced with the early view of a new grandchild with an obvious beating heart now heard as little thumps over the speakers.

"I see, my lány," her mother replied, somewhat overwhelmed herself at the sight and sound. "It is good, yes, what is there?" she asked even as the doctor's pager sounded again more urgently it seemed if that was possible.

"Yes, it looks that way," Dr. Geisner reported. "What is the growth percentile?" she asked as her assistant was busily clicking away in a rapid fashion.

"Roughly 15th, same as last time," Christine reported as she hurried along while glancing at the records. "I will need to go back and confirm to be exact," she advised.

"Does that mean something's wrong since it's so low?" Eddie worried.

"No, not necessarily," Dr. Geisner assured. "Your baby is measuring very petite for the gestational age, but is active and growing at a steady rate and that's a far greater indicator of good health than general size. Both you and your mother are lighter framed, so that is not a surprise. Christine will go back and double check everything and make sure there is good blood flow through the placenta, but at first glance I see no problems there. Please measure the fluid level now and then scan the kidneys," she requested with a followed apology as she sensed Eva was not overly pleased with the speed at which things were being carried out. "I'm so sorry to hurry, but I'll need to leave shortly as it appears we have a new baby anxious to find the light upstairs."

"AFI remains at 7 using quadrants," the sonographer revealed as her rapid fire skills were being tested. "Bilateral involvement shown in both kidneys consistent with the last scan."

"Okay, Eddie," Dr. Geisner started as she stood up and reviewed the chart, once again noting the fact that it was the parent's clear wish not to know the sex as she framed her prognosis carefully since her favored diagnosis was gender-specific. "There are no significant changes to our findings from last time. Your fluid level remains just below normal which is a little worrisome so we will continue to track you very carefully with bi-weekly scans as your pregnancy progresses, but at this point given your karyotyping results I don't believe a referral to Boston is necessary as their recommendation would be a conservative approach with these indicators. Should anything change substantially as we get into the later stages of your term, of course I will not hesitate to send you up there and I will continue to keep Dr. DePaula at BCH in the loop."

"Is there anything that can be done other than waiting?" Eva demanded impatiently as she had grown instantly attached and fiercely protective of her newest unoka after viewing her antics and profile on the screen. "After what has happened in the family I do not wish for my daughter to have continued worry over both this and her husband. It cannot be good for her or the baby!"

"Mom, please let Dr. Geisner speak. She's in a hurry, and I trust her to tell me what's needed," Eddie chided even as she admitted relief that she could honestly inform Jamie a trip north without him was not yet warranted.

"Right now, I am still confident that the baby's kidney issues will resolve without interference, so the best thing you can do is stay well-hydrated yourself, eat correctly, take your prenatal vitamins and rest as much as possible. With a smaller amount of fluid in there surrounding the fetus there is less protection the larger it becomes. Should there be further concern it might be necessary to put you on bed rest, but I don't think that's requisite right now so long as you are careful. Stay off your feet if you can and drink plenty of water. No lifting or straining. You've already switched over to lighter duty, correct?"

"Yes, I'm just doing computer research at a desk with regular daytime hours now," Eddie confirmed as she bit her lip with concern over the mention of extended enforced bed rest. With Jamie confined to that already for the foreseeable future and an active three-year-old in the picture it would be difficult to keep the household running smoothly even with Eva's live-in help as her mother was now back at work at her new managerial position at the agency in Park Slope and already having to take the morning off to escort her here for this visit.

"Yes, her hours are more reasonable, but then she drives all the way through the city to see her husband before coming home late and getting up early to attend to her daughter," Eva tattled. "You are tiring yourself too much now, Edit, and I have heard what the doctor has said. It will be no more," she vowed sternly. "You will tell Jamison the beba comes first, and he will not expect to see you every day, or I will speak to him myself."

"Well, it certainly sounds as if I don't have to worry about you following doctor's orders from here on out as long as I keep your mother in the loop," Dr. Geisner smirked with a nod towards the older woman's determination before her pager went off once again. "And that is my signal to go. Try not to worry, Eddie, and before long it will be you and Jamie upstairs ready to welcome your little one into the world."

###

"Okay, I'm ready now," Jamie sighed with relief as he leaned back against the bed after hanging up the phone with Eddie who had reported Dr. Geisner's findings to him by the letter under the watchful ear of Eva while the two women were leaving the office together. "The baby's still doing good, or at least the same as before, and the genetic tests came back and said she couldn't have the one thing we were really worried about so Ed doesn't need to see the specialist… not yet, anyway," he informed Quincy who could have guessed as much given his roommate's reaction. "She just needs to rest more."

"So what, exactly, are you ready for, then?" came the somewhat colder than usual query from his normally chipper new buddy.

"Look, I know I crossed a line there earlier," Jamie tried to apologize again as Quincy had remained uncharacteristically quiet ever since the confrontation with Rigs had occurred.

"You were damn disrespectful."

"I… I won't argue that point," he agreed shamefully as the hardest part of this whole endeavor was being forced to act in that manner because as hard as he tried he couldn't come up with another approach that would allow him to continue to hide the truth so that he didn't taint the investigation by revealing it too soon. "I want to try to do better though," he continued honestly. "Tell me about the sharks so I can understand what he wants and he'll talk to me again. Please?"

"I shouldn't after that stunt, but…" Quincy trailed off while shaking his head. "During land warfare training, which is kinda ironic now that I think about it," he started to explain flatly as he was ordered after a long pause. "They fly us out to San Clemente Island. Do you know where that is?"

"Yeah, it's off the coast of San Diego, right?" Jamie recounted. "My friend Spencer that I roomed with at Harvard has a house on the beach near there… it's where I go… I mean I used to go surfing," he corrected sadly with the acknowledgement that his favorite annual ritual might have very well come to an end now. "It's where I proposed to Eddie and I remember that Spence and I sailed out past San Clemente on his boat one time."

"So you're not afraid to get in the water out there hanging on a piece of foam dressed in a wetsuit looking like a damn seal? Pardon the pun," Quincy continued at that reference to his chosen career. "You know what breeds in the waters around there, right? Things that tend to eat them. Ever think about that?"

"Me? No, well I… uh, I guess I never did. I mean I actually really suck at surfing. Just got it in my head that I need to make one ride into the beach for luck each new year. Look what happened this time when I backed out," he shook his head. "It actually started as a drinking game challenge one winter break with a bunch of the guys when I was the only one left standing."

"Yeah, well they give us challenges out there too," Quincy continued. "But they ain't the fun ones. To pass training, there's a series of long swims to complete… the worst of them is at night. Before that one the instructors sit around and brief the trainees on all the kinds of sharks that live in the area including the great whites and what to do if you happen to run into one. I gotta tell you I think Rigs lives for that day every year. I mean you oughta see the look on his face when he sort of slides it in there that no student of his has ever been eaten by a shark… at least not lately," he chuckled at the memory. "By that point he's got three quarters of the squad ready to piss their pants before they get set to jump in and the rest already have, then he tells us not to do that 'cause the big ones will follow the scent trail for miles and track in on you that way."

"Geez," Jamie huffed at the thought and wondered if he would ever be able to paddle out past the break again without thinking about that imagery. "That's all he gives you?"

"Nah, right before you go he'll tell you if one starts to circle your position, you gotta stand your ground and not back down. Can't act afraid and let them see it."

"Yeah, easier said than done. Pretty sure at that point they wouldn't have any problem finding me… sight, smell or sound. What if that doesn't work?"

"Then if one comes for you, just summon all your strength and punch him in the snout and he'll turn and swim away. But that's not what the lesson is about, Ice," Quincy advised.

"It's not?"

"Nope. There's lots of sharks in the world and while you can't back down from them, you can't focus on them either. Stuff is circling around and coming out of the shadows tryin' to distract us. You gotta be prepared to deal with it, but if you go looking over your shoulder all the time and expecting them to come after you… if you see the sharks, you'll lose sight of your goal and forget about the fact that the whole reason for the swim in the first place is just getting from point A to B. Nothing more. Our mission here is to walk again," he wrapped up succinctly on a sad note and for the first time seemed rather fallible in his belief in himself. "You keep having days like the one today… you're gonna end up like me. Rigs wanted us to talk about it 'cause he sees me going down that same path again too."

"No, Quince… I thought those other docs messed you up," Jamie reasoned as he was surprised to hear that tone. "Kenzie's trying to fix what they did. That's not your fault."

"I listened to 'em. Hell, in the beginning I didn't really give a damn what they did to me," Quincy confessed as the failures of the past few rehab sessions caused him to slip back a little towards a darker time of his own right after his injury. "Kenz and Rigs have given me one last chance to jump off and finish this thing. He'll leave to go back to California in a few months and she needs this study to work… I still can't get my balance so even if she manages to get me on a prosthesis, I'm not gonna be able to stand up without fallin' over, and if I don't swim past the sharks and get back on both feet so I can take care of myself, I'll let them both down and won't have anyone left. I'm gonna have to ring the bell then, Ice."

"No you won't… you'll get through it," Jamie assured softly as he sank back down against his pillow with the sense that he owed his friend some kind of incentive to paddle anyway even if there were unknown perils still in his way in the form of Rigs' secrets or Oliver Wendell's pending federal indictment. Right now he couldn't think of anyone else he'd rather punch in that handlebar-mustached snout and drive away. "We both will together."

"You don't know that for sure… right now neither of us do," Quincy admitted with a sigh as he crossed his arms over his head and sank back against his pillow.

"I know you're not gonna be alone," Jamie promised before settling on something that just might keep a certain someone giving a hundred and fifty percent no matter what the other outcome might be.

"Hey, Quince," he wondered innocently out loud after a long pause with a grin coming over his face. "Those distractions you need to ignore to get to point B… do pretty little red-headed cops count?"

"Not in my book," Quincy perked up a little immediately and looked over at his roommate to judge if he was serious.

"Because I gotta tell you, man, I know one I could call right now who owes me a visit, but she's not for the faint of heart. Takes down armed thugs twice her size and organizes marathon training sessions just so she can watch the rest of us cry. You still interested?"

"Hell, yeah!"

"Well, if you can keep up with her, you'll be running circles around me in no time."

"You bet your ass I will! Ooh-rah!"

 **SEAL Rule #7: So, if you want to change the world, don't back down from the sharks.**

* * *

 _Ah, the first of those infamous rules to hit us in the balance of the story. Next Danny's nightmares are hitting a little too close to the present again as Renzulli hones in on what's going on and Quincy finally gets the chance to meet the possible future Mrs. Johnson after Jamie has a chat with his former rookie._


	86. Chapter 86

Chapter 86

" _Yeah?" came the sleepy answer on autopilot from the head that remained on the pillow once the typical late-night buzz of the phone laying on the nightstand was recognized by a sluggish brain unsuccessfully trying to force itself out of a deep, much needed level of sleep._

" _Detective Reagan? It's Anna Zoltin. I don't know if you remember me."_

" _Yeah, of course I do. What is it?"_

" _I'm sorry, I know it's late. I just... I didn't know who else to turn to. I'm scared. I don't even know if you can help me. Sonny said no one can, and it's time for you to come down here again so he can finish what you seem to have started."_

" _What? Who said that?"_

" _I don't know why I called."_

" _Okay, wait… Anna... Anna?"_

"Danny?" Linda rolled over and nudged her sleeping husband with concern as he was obviously experiencing another one of now frequent nightmares, though she was thankful this one seemed unrelated to his service or brother and the flashbacks those two things mixed together had seemed to stir up… or so she thought. "Wake up! You're having another one of your bad dreams and your phone is ringing again. You ignored it before. Who is Anna Zoltin? I've heard that name," she reported suspiciously.

"Huh?" he answered, still obviously confused and now irritated as a reach for the device after coming to his senses had only succeeded in knocking it to the floor and the tone that followed while he retrieved it and sat up on the side of the bed indicated a voicemail had been left from dispatch. A look at the screen also showed a missed notification from an unrecognized number several hours before.

"You knew I got a call before and you didn't wake me?" he grumbled.

"It said 'unknown' when I looked over and you had finally gotten to sleep," Linda argued back. "Danny, you're running on empty after weeks of stress and not sleeping right and you wanted me to wake you for that? It could have been a robo dialer. If it had been from someone important, I would have said something. You still had bad dreams half the night anyway," she defended.

"What bad dreams?" he griped, having no memory of anything since closing his eyes hours before.

"You were just mumbling about someone named Anna and not being able to help her," she remained on point even as he was trying to reorient himself and listen to the message which was unsettling considering the circumstances… notification that he and Baez had caught a possible homicide as the Harbor unit had pulled a young woman's body out of the East River just below the Manhattan bridge… just like Anna Zoltin.

"Who is she?"

"Oh, uh… just a case I had with Jackie a long time ago," he explained while reaching for his clothes and trying to brush it off while recalling the details. "A high-end call girl trying to get her life back together that wound up getting her neck broke by a Madison Avenue attorney. Jamie and Renzulli were first on scene when…" he stopped and his heart jumped at the mention of another coincidence with Sonny Malevsky his father didn't believe in. "When another detective found my card in her pocket. She called me from a blocked number before it happened, but hung up so I never got back to her in time. I gotta go babe," he deflected as if it was nothing while grabbing his phone and badge. "Baez and I are up."

###

"Okay. Got it. Thanks. 10-4. M.E.'s still an hour and a half out," rookie officer Annabel Anderson reported as she and Renzulli stood over the body of the young woman pulled from the East River even while she adjusted her collar up against the stiff wind coming off the water and jumped up and down in place a bit with a desire to warm up her slight build in the bitter cold of the early January predawn. The sight itself was unsettling and had her upset of course, but in truth, so had the events of the whole evening ever since learning she had drawn a third shift patrol with none other than her Lieutenant in a highly unusual procedural move which was nerve-wracking in itself. Renzulli had obviously been fishing for the right time to drop some heavy news on her given his hemming, hawing and off-tune singing all night long before finally coming clean just before this call to inform her on the down low that her mentor, Sergeant Jamison Reagan, would not be returning to service and had requested she finish off her first probationary year under Patterson's guidance.

"Sad. Beautiful young girl. Still has makeup on, too," Renzulli noted as the familiarity of the scene was not lost on him either as he recalled an eerily similar encounter with another rookie back in the day when he and Jamie had stood in nearly this very spot waiting for then-Detective Sonny Malevsky to show.

"Must have just happened," Annabel agreed.

"Ours is not to speculate. We secure the scene, and then we wait… Reagan must have told you that a hundred times by now even if you only rode with him for a few months. When he was my boot, we pulled out his first floater out in practically this very spot and I remember givin' him the same advice."

"He did, boss," the young rookie responded sadly. "He taught me so much. I just can't believe that he's… well that he's not coming back," she added and shook her head in disbelief. "He left me a message last night asking me to come up and see him at Columbia this afternoon after shift so I guess that's what he wanted to tell me. Patty… Officer Patterson is a really good TO too and I'm lucky to ride with him, don't get me wrong, sir… but Sergeant Reagan was so good with people. I felt like we really made a difference every single day we were out there because a lot of the times we were in the right place at the right time to stop something before it got bigger… and that's the kind of cop I want to be," she admitted.

"Yeah, Harvard's got a real knack for that," Renzulli agreed with a smug smile as he remembered some of their own adventures. "Taught him everything he knows," he joked to lighten her mood. "Here comes the brain trust now," he noted as Danny and Baez pulled up and exited their car. "Just our luck, you get to work with a Reagan today after all."

"Lieutenant," Danny acknowledged wearily as he walked up suddenly looking older than Renzulli had ever seen him before as he leaned down and pulled back the yellow tarp to reveal the young woman's vaguely familiar face. "Suicide?" he questioned.

"You askin' for my opinion?" Renzulli returned in surprise as his mouth dropped open, having hardly ever felt respected before by the older brother at a scene even at his current rank. Obviously whatever was going on inside the Reagan family was leaving Danny totally off his game, be it Jamie's injury or something else. "Not unless she broke her own neck," he concluded with a shrug towards Annabel.

"You don't think she jumped from the bridge and just floated down?" the rookie questioned, eager to learn as always.

"No contusions," Maria noted as she studied the woman's face and then proceeded to pull on a pair of gloves before patting her down while searching for some ID. "If she jumped she would have hit the water at sixty-some miles an hour. That's not to say she wouldn't have broken her neck, but it looks like somebody did it for her. Let's see if there's anything in these pockets."

"Well, then someone had a reason for doing this and putting her in here," Danny noted as he trained his flashlight down on the bruising evident around the young woman's throat.

"Got something," Maria announced as her fingers worked carefully to pull a wad of wet paper out of the small front pocket of the victim's jeans. "Looks like an NYPD business card," she mused, recognizing the familiar emblem and layout before carefully unfolding it and bringing her flashlight down to illuminate the text. "Detective Daniel Reagan," she gasped and looked up at him in shock. "Danny, you know her?"

"What?! No, I don't think so… the hell?" he insisted as he brought the light over her again and thoroughly studied her features… the pale skin and the cloudy, lifeless eyes under a tangle of long, blond hair was somewhat hauntingly familiar although not directly, and Danny was absolutely sure of that regardless of his current stress level or lack of sleep. "I feel like I've seen the face somewhere recently… maybe... but I swear I've never talked to her before," he insisted. "I have no idea why she would have my card."

"Now, there's one for the small world department," Renzulli muttered under his breath in Sonny Malevsky's own words as he uneasily shifted his feet. Suddenly the detective standing opposite him wasn't the only one with hair prickling up on the back of his neck as he put the pieces together with a familiar scene that had played out in this very spot with Anna Zoltin.

"Think someone's trying to send you a message?" Maria questioned as she remained out of the loop.

"Yeah, maybe," Danny answered honestly as he ran his hand over his head and glanced up at the Lieutenant who was one of the few outside the family with the exception of Jackie who knew many of the details about what had gone down before with Malevsky and his cohorts and had clearly recognized that fact now so would now have to be brought into the current investigation as well. Suddenly the noose seemed to be tightening around Danny's own throat once more and his mind raced to make sense of any of it before Renzulli summed up the rest for him.

"It's déjà vu all over again."

###

"Sergeant Reagan?" an uncharacteristically hesitant inquiry came from a familiar voice in the doorway of the common visitor's room located across from the gym and rehab area on the level below the patient floor of Dr. MacKenzie's wards. Jamie had deliberately directed his young rookie to the less secure and more public meeting place after a call she was on her way up in order to fulfill a promise to his now brother-from-another-mother, Quincy, who was nervously shooting hoops by himself across the way, although atypically missing most of them, in order to give the two former partners some space to say what needed to be said before any outside introductions took place.

"Hey," Jamie lit up as he waved Annabel in to join him while he was sitting next to the table and noticed that all eyes in the room instantly fell on the pretty, slight, athletically built red-headed young woman and he couldn't help but feel protective of her in an older sibling sort of way, much as he had on the job after promising her father at her Academy graduation that he would keep a watch over her during her probationary year. With most of Kenzie's patients brought in on military transports from out of the area, there were few visitors for any of the others during the day and between Eddie, Erin, Linda and now Annie, he certainly had seemed to corner the market on outside attractive females. "It's great to see you," he assured even as he could sense her shock at the change in his appearance since the last time they had ridden together. "I wasn't sure what shift you were on or if you'd be able to make it up here today," he carried on anyway.

"I worked an overnight with Lieutenant Renzulli," she offered quietly which immediately explained the sad, resigned look on her face as Tony had obviously followed through as promised and made it clear that Patterson would be her new permanent training officer now.

"Oh, okay… good," Jamie answered somewhat awkwardly as he looked down at the brace on his leg which had been allowed to remain broken at a more comfortable angle as a reward after a better day in the rehab room. "Then I guess you've heard."

"Yes, sir."

"Alright, so, you and Patty…" he lectured sternly in his best sergeant voice for what felt like the last time in his career, having no idea that Annabel herself had been witness to another link to the Templar in an attempt to rattle his older brother just hours before, but had been advised by her Lieutenant not to bring up the incident to Jamie after he and Danny had shared an animated private conversation afterwards which had brought an angry and suspicious Renzulli into the fold as he recognized a recurrent threat to his former partner from an organization that had also claimed Joe's life, another of his favorite rookies.

"Now just because I'm not there in the car anymore doesn't mean I expect anything less from the two of you," Jamie continued to speak, still in the dark to a large extent over the threat to the family although that would soon change with his wife's own reconnaissance mission as things in both investigations would come to a head and secrets were revealed on both sides.

"You pull another stunt like you did on that domestic call and I'll make sure you're both busted over to transit on Staten Island instead of getting a commendation bar next time, got it? You're better than that and I expect more from you, Officer Anderson."

"Yes, sir," she swallowed hard with guilt, having no idea why but feeling as if she had been asked to betray his trust before her arrival here.

"Jamie," he softened finally as he pointed to the nearby chair. "C'mon, have a seat. Now that we got that out of the way, it's just Jamie from here on out... okay, Annabel? I'm glad Renzulli talked to you first, but I wanted to make sure you heard it from me too… and I wanted to thank you for everything you've been doing for Eddie and me for the last few weeks. It was rough there for a bit and I was out of touch, but it really means alot to us."

"Of course, you're welcome, sir… and you know I would do anything… I mean are you going to be alright, Jamie?" she pronounced deliberately with a pained look as she raised her eyebrows since addressing him like that sounded completely foreign to the by-the-book rookie who had taken her job and status seriously from day one.

"Yeah, I think so, eventually anyway," he assured with a smile in his best, positive-sounding voice to put her at ease since she was still looking skittish. "You know this rehab stuff is tough though… as bad as your marathon training. Sometimes I almost miss it," he kidded even though the truth was he'd give almost anything to go back to his old life and be able to run every single day again to knock that item off his bucket list. "How's that going, anyway?"

"Williams and Mitchell just dropped out," she frowned with disappointment as she plopped into the chair and saw her grand plan implode for an NYPD marathon team for the St. Jude Children's Hospital charity run that spring. "They were the only ones left, and now you're… I'm sorry, sir," she sighed a little at how hard this change was to process. "I feel awful for bringing it up especially considering everything you've been going through, but well, I guess I was counting on you to push me through it. I don't know if I can keep myself motivated alone… lately I've been hitting the wall around sixteen or seventeen on my long runs and can't seem to work my way past it. I'm starting to get worried I won't ever be able to go the full distance. The other marathoners I've talked to say it usually doesn't happen until four or five miles later. Twenty-six still seems way out of reach."

"Huh, that's too bad," Jamie mused in a bit of surprise at that admission as Annabel was known for jumping into something with both feet and taking no prisoners and he sought to find a way to encourage her to continue while bringing Quincy into the conversation at the same time since he could see his friend sneaking anxious glances through the doorway across the hall out of the corner of his eye. "Sounds more mental than anything else unless maybe you're not eating enough carbs before the run? What's your dad say?" he wondered knowing that Annabel's hands-on father, Bill Anderson, a former football player and longtime coach himself, certainly had an opinion on it. "I'm surprised he's not out there in his truck chasing you around."

"He does, and he says that I'm doing everything right in my training so it must be all in my head… that I have to be tougher, but with the cold and everything else that's happened I've been slacking off a little myself the past few weeks."

"Well, I'm finding out a lot about that too," Jamie admitted with a sad, ironic huff as he was facing similar issues albeit on opposite sides of the spectrum. "I mean I'm just trying to make my leg move a little, but my PT told me that's gonna be the hardest part of all this... being able to get myself past the point my mind tells me I can go," he pointed from his head to his brace. "It's been tough, but most of these guys here though," he nodded with a glance around the room. "That's what they're best at, pushing through the mind games. I wouldn't have a chance in hell of getting through this without their help."

"Well, then maybe I need to talk to one of them," Annabel laughed and opened the perfect door to an introduction as some of the anxiety from the situation waned between them, leaving just the easy friendship that had developed over the prior few months. "Someone needs to get out there besides my pop and kick my butt."

"Funny you should say that," Jamie hedged before deciding to come clean with a bit of a sheepish glance. "Look, this is kind of embarrassing and it's gonna sound like we're back in grade school or something, but I gotta be honest, there was another reason I asked you up here today. I've got this friend… my roommate, actually; his name is Quincy Johnson. I owe him a big favor for putting up with me and he's been dying to meet you ever since he saw the news after the shooting. He's been a little down this week, and well... you're the only thing else he's been talking about."

"Get outta here," Annabel laughed at first as she waited for the punch line, fully expecting her former TO was just kidding about her dating prospects, or lack thereof, as he often did in the car to keep her relaxed. "Wait, you're serious, aren't you? I told you every guy I've gone out with lately is either too weirded out by the fact I'm on the job and carry a gun or turns tail as soon as he meets my linebacker of a father."

"Well, this one's a Navy SEAL with sniper training, so I don't think he's gonna care about the gun thing or be intimidated, and he's got a gift for motivating people like you do. With all that mental and physical training he's done I bet he could help get past your wall, but I won't lie, Annabel, he's been hurt bad and gone through some really tough stuff afterwards... you'll see. The doc is trying to get him to walk again, and I know he can, but he's got no family at all to support him. Look, you know me… I would _never_ do this if I didn't think you might actually like him and he wasn't a really great person, but he is… he's like a brother to me already. If it's too weird though, you can just say hi, and that's all… no strings. I was just gonna introduce you to him and not say the rest, but it didn't feel right," he admitted sincerely. "You're still my partner, and I gotta look out for you."

"And you're still my partner, and I trust you… so where is he?" she laughed as her face lit up with a mischievous glance across the hall. "Please tell me it's that cute guy over there that's been watching us and pretending to play basketball all this time. Looks like he needs some help with that too."

###

"You did what?" Eddie gasped at her husband's unanticipated confession of matchmaking even as she savored the fact that she could talk to her him more openly from her station at the desk upstairs in the squad now that the overbearing Sergeant Dexter had been removed, ironically only to be dropped in rank and put under Detective Abigail Baker's direct command at 1PP since Gormley could think of no one better to take charge of the chauvinistic former sergeant and give him one last chance at reform.

"And they hit it off?"

"Believe it or not, I think they really did," Jamie admitted with satisfaction after he had made himself scarce in true bro code fashion once it was clear that Annabel and Quincy were comfortable talking with one another. "They even ordered in some food. I definitely got the feeling I was turning into a third wheel so I begged off there at the end to come up here to change and go back to the gym and give them some time alone… I'm headed down there now that I called you, and I don't think I've been missed," he chuckled.

"Huh," Eddie pondered with a little smirk as she considered the pairing of what from the outside appeared to be opposites in type, but whose personalities could definitely mesh. "I hope for Quincy's sake it works out… he's a really nice guy and Annabel's a sweetheart after all she's done for us... even if you always spoiled her and let her drive the car all the time," she huffed at the thought considering that had always been a sore spot in their own partnership.

"Eddie," Jamie warned before they went down that road tinged with jealousy again.

"So rehab went better today?" she deflected to a new topic and questioned considering his relaxed tone, knowing that his stress level had been high the day before over missing the baby appointment with Dr. G. and given Eva's and now Jamie's insistence that she adhere to the doctor's instructions for more downtime, there was no way she was going to be able to manage a trip north to visit him each night anymore.

"Yeah, Aaron even left my brace unlocked a bit more and had me try a recumbent bike… I didn't really get it to work yet though," he admitted as the directive to use his right leg to push the pedal over the top just one time had left him lying in a puddle of sweat with no joy earlier. Aware that a certain commander's eyes had been on him through the process, he hoped returning to try again after hours might draw Rigs out of his room once more for a private conversation now that Quincy was happily occupied. "Thought I would go and give it another shot now since you're headed home to get some rest tonight, right?" he challenged. "Ed?"

"Right," Eddie replied distractedly as she spotted an interesting encounter downstairs on the street in front of the precinct from her perch behind the desk upstairs and her newly stimulated detective senses tingled. A stressed-looking Detective Daniel Reagan had just arrived near the end of shift and could be seen dragging a reluctant Marcus Beale into the building for what appeared to be a serious talk, no doubt regarding the baby issue which might mean that he was vulnerable and distracted. Ignoring Jamie's edict to use Linda or Baez to recon why Danny was still interested in the Chevelle, Eddie decided instead to go directly to the source a la Henry Reagan to throw him off balance and ask him about the Gonzalves connection and borrowed manual as soon as he came out of his impromptu meeting. "Listen lambchop, I love you, but I need to get this report to one of the detectives before they leave for the day," she fibbed. "Can I call later tonight when you're back in your room? I promise I'm gonna be home with my feet up by then."

"Sure thing, Ed," Jamie agreed. "I should get going too if I'm gonna do this," he added, his mind now likewise on an operation to confront and uncover exactly what might be going on with a certain former military man with a very big secret to keep.

* * *

 _Next up, Danny meets with Marcus to propose the adoption solution before a brief run in with Eddie in the hallway at the 12th precinct will spark suspicion that maybe her brother-in-law has an added secret to hide and send her off on a little trip to test her sleuthing skills._

 _On a personal note, thanks for the PMs and wishes. It's been a rough couple of weeks and a long year, but Mom is at peace now. Writing continues to be an outlet for me... I started my first story "He lets me call him Frank now" right when I lost my dad, also a Frank, and very much like our beloved Commish a few years ago so that character has a special place in my heart too. As for this story, I'm just about ready to wrap up the final chapters now and when I have them settled in the tank I'll start back with the Tues./Thurs. posting schedule again. As always, the reviews and support are always greatly appreciated. :)_


	87. Chapter 87

Chapter 87

"Alright, so you've had a few days to think about this… what'd you come up with? How are you gonna handle this mess?" Danny demanded as he pulled out a chair and sat down heavily in an empty office when Marcus reluctantly returned from the locker room after changing out of his uniform and closed the door, prepared to face the music.

"You know, you look like crap," the younger man irritably noted the darker than normal bags under Danny's eyes and tried to deflect the conversation somewhat to take some of the focus off himself. "Don't tell me you've been up all night worrying about it. It's _my_ problem, and I told you I'm taking care of it."

"Well, pardon me if I don't take your word for that considering your track record here," Danny sniped, taken back slightly by the insolent attitude Marcus met him with which was not the norm for his departed Marine buddy's son who had always tended more towards the line of hero worship before. "And what's this badge bunny's name anyway so I know what to call her?"

"Look, I already told you Uncle D, I'm not cut out for the dad thing yet, and don't do that; her name is Lise… Lise Martinez. She's not just some bunny… she's a good person for giving me a say in what happens and trying to do the right thing, isn't she? We're meeting this weekend and I'm gonna tell her to go ahead with the agency she picked out. She said all I gotta do is sign some papers and she'll take care of the rest."

"So that's it? Wham, bam, thank you ma'am, and now you're gonna have to live with yourself wondering what kinda family this baby's gonna have for the rest of its life? That's your blood in this kid, Marcus," Danny sighed as he sat back and rubbed his temple, an ever-present low-grade lack of sleep headache making its presence known a little more vigorously now as the stresses continued to mount for him and he was physically struggling to deal with them all. "It's your Dad's blood, too… part of what he spilled for me and the rest of us there on that street in Iraq. Jimmy Beale gave his life for us that day and while he lay there dying, I promised him I would look after his family back here. That's all he was worried about… someone taking care of you and your mom. He'da given almost anything for the two of you, and now you're just gonna walk away and let your kid go to God knows where… someplace he or she will probably never know about their grandfather and the hero that he was. That's not right and I'm telling you as a man and a father myself… if you go through with this you're gonna regret it when it's too late to do anything about it."

"If he had been worried about us, he would'a come home instead of you," Marcus muttered bitterly under his breath as he turned away and looked out the window… a near lifetime of growing up without his own father had left scars that ran deep but he dared not bring that up now even if he was getting more than a touch annoyed by being dressed down in this manner once more. "And I am doing right by the kid," he defended vehemently over his shoulder. "I got some money saved up and I'm gonna give it to Lise for her out of pocket medical stuff to make sure she can take care of herself before it's born so it can be healthy."

"Well, that's something at least, but what if there was another way?" Danny inserted now that he had the inkling that his pseudo-nephew had even the slightest bit of interest in the soon-to-be child's welfare given that concession. "One where you could stay in touch to make sure the baby was being raised right and always knew where it came from?"

"Like what?" Marcus puzzled as he had been racking his brain for such a solution but thus far had turned up blank. "I told you my mom said she can't help take care of it right now. All the chemo and surgery really took it out of her last year and her doctor said she can't have too much stress now while she's trying to stay in remission. I don't need to lose her too!"

"That's not what I was thinking. I know your mom's been having a tough time with her health lately. Look, I was talking to Jamie because he's up on all this legal stuff after what he went through last year with his daughter. He said you can do something in New York called an open adoption if you go through an agency or lawyer. It allows for you to sign off on a legally enforceable plan so you can have an ongoing relationship with the kid––anything from getting a couple of pictures and a letter once a year to more regular visitation, whatever you and the adoptive parents agree on."

"I told you, Lise already said she isn't interested in any of that," Marcus reminded him as he mistook the point. "She's doing this because she doesn't believe in abortion for herself, but it was a mistake what happened between us and she just wants to go on and put it completely behind her. She's planning to be a cop next year, not worried about being a single mom, and she figures maybe she can make it right by helping someone else out this way."

"And that's her right," Danny agreed. "And I give her props for going about it like this and telling you, but then you have rights too, and it can just be the father that chooses to be in this arrangement––her name and identity can be kept out of it if she lists you as sole parent and just puts your name on the birth certificate. You said she was willing to sign over everything to you legally, right? That's probably what she meant, so if she does that you can still go ahead with something like this on your own."

"I don't know," the younger man sighed as he paced back and forth a few steps before turning around. "I'm not sure if any kid would gain something from that… it's not like I have all that much to give back, do I? And where would I go to find a lawyer I could afford, or a family who wants to have someone like me in the middle of their business for the next however many years?" he shook his head at the uncomfortable idea of trying to insert himself into someone's personal lives in that manner. "No, it would be too weird, wouldn't it? Especially if I ever found a girl and wanted to settle down. I think the kid should know one father and it's better off not being me."

"What if it's not?" Danny hedged. "I mean what if it's a family that already knows you and your business?" he started to explain as Marcus stared back and tried to connect the dots. "Listen kid, Linda and I talked..."

"Oh, no… Uncle Danny… I could never ask you to do that! You've done enough for me!"

"Then think of this as a way to pay me back. Look, I'm not gonna get into all the reasons behind this, but it's something we're interested in doing for us not just you," Danny smoothed over and left out the details about his and Linda's own baby situation. "With Jack going off to college next fall, she's kinda got the empty nest thing going on and she's always wanted another," he used a convenient albeit somewhat untrue excuse to cover. "This um, whole situation… it's made us think about it again."

"And Aunt Linda would be willing to take care of my kid?" Marcus returned incredulously as his mouth dropped open at the thought. "C'mon, she's never exactly been a fan of mine," he pointed out honestly in a vast understatement as the older Reagan couple had often shared wildly different opinions on how Danny had gone about his obligations to the Beale family over the years and his input and influence on this young man's life.

"No she hasn't," Danny admitted. "But that's been on account of your actions in the past and you could change a lot of that now by manning up and showing her you're handling it like an adult… you could change a lot of people's minds that way, Marcus. Listen, we're not exactly rolling in it either, but my brother said he could give us the name of an adoption attorney who can handle all the paperwork on this and give us a break on the fees. You agree to kick in a little of that money you were talking about now and take some responsibility going forward and we'll do the same. Between the three of us we can raise this kid and do right by your father's memory too," he added since his promise to Jimmy all those years ago was still a driving factor in this. "He'd be proud of you for stepping up and seeing this through for his grandchild. We both owe him and your mom that much. You think this Lise would go for that?"

"Yeah, maybe," Marcus conceded as he thought about her situation as he knew it. "Especially if she knows for sure it's going to a good home and I can help her out. She's got a part-time job and still has insurance and stuff from her parents because she's finishing up her last year in criminal justice at John Jay this spring, but once she's done with that in May they're gonna cut her off and academy doesn't start until fall. She's worried about being out of work for the summer and was hoping the adoptive parents would be able to cover some of her expenses. I guess I could work some overtime between now and then if you really think we could make this happen… the kid could grow up knowing who I am?" he asked with markedly less hesitation than initially as the idea grew on him and he allowed himself to consider it.

"Yeah, I really do as long as we all agree upfront to go about it the right way," Danny assured, perhaps overly confident now that he could guide the younger man forward and keep his wife happy at the same time––a win-win in his book even if Linda had confessed to still having doubts over the arrangement given Marcus's penchant for being self-centered and screwing much simpler things up. A glance at his watch reminded him there was some place else he needed to be soon though as another covert meeting was required to deal with what seemed to be the never ending avalanche of "coincidences" that had befallen the Reagan family as of late since his early morning floater call with Baez had now left him with more questions than answers after the body had been identified. "Listen, you need to talk to her and get back to me right away, alright?" he advised before standing up. "If we're gonna do this, I want to get it locked down so I can tell Linda it's gonna happen, but I gotta go meet someone and then get home for dinner before midnight. Been out since four this morning as it is."

"Okay, I promise Uncle Danny," Marcus nodded eagerly as he accepted the plan. "I'll call Lise right now and set something up… maybe I can even meet her tonight. I was headed to Mom's for dinner and she lives up that way above Yorkville, anyway.

"Yeah… speaking of your mom," Danny hedged with that segue having practically no time until now to focus on that little gem of an announcement Marcus had left him with the other day regarding some email he had supposedly sent about having an anniversary ceremony for his long lost unit. Convinced now that it was part of the pattern of psychological warfare being waged against the family, and himself in particular, he hoped to turn it around on whoever was orchestrating this if he could get his hands on an electronic copy of that email and perhaps have TARU run a trace on the origin to track the bastard down who was behind all of this. "If she still has it, can you ask her to print out or better yet forward me a copy of that thing I sent her about borrowing your dad's tags for the testimonial? Sean was messing around with the computer and deleted a bunch of my stuff. I just wanted a record of everything to keep it straight," he outright lied with what to anyone else would have sounded like the weakest plausible excuse possible, but to a distracted Marcus did not even register as a blip of untruth.

"Sure… I'll do it myself while I'm up there," the younger officer agreed before going to the door, ready to leave and set this plan for the baby in motion now that he was totally on board with the idea. "I'm sure she still has it… she never deletes anything, and she's really happy that you're willing to do something like that for the families."

"Great, you do that... I'm still working on the details, but it's the least I can do, right?" Danny fluffed as the thought suddenly occurred to him that no matter how this worked out he would indeed have to go forward with whatever had been proposed to the other families or come off as looking like dirt if it was revealed it had not been his intention at all. "Call me when you know anything from Lise," he added as he followed Marcus out into the hall and leaned tiredly with one hand up against the doorway while watching him hurry off towards the front doors and considered the fact that the younger man had little chance in hell of ever advancing beyond patrol in this lifetime given his inability to read chutzpah as was a God-given Reagan family character trait… or was that also acquired? Even in his currently preoccupied state he would have never fallen for such an anemic excuse he huffed and reached down to hit a speed dial number on his phone just before a familiar voice from behind made him jump.

"Danny?"

"Hey, Eddie," he countered and turned around even as he quickly swiped the screen to end his intended call just as the voice on the other end of the line picked up… one with a distinctly thick but yet still feminine Brooklyn accent although clearly not Linda or even Baez for that matter, a guilty movement that did not go unnoticed by his observant sister-in-law as her eyes narrowed. If Danny had been here to speak to Marcus about an issue as personal to the couple as adopting a baby, clearly the first person he should have called afterwards was his wife, but that had apparently not happened here. If he was working a case, the next logical person would be his partner Maria Baez. It had been Eddie's intention to confront him immediately as he stepped out of this meeting with some questions about the Gonsalves matter and the Chevelle to gauge his off balanced reaction, but Jamie was right… his older brother was looking worn and daresay a bit wild-eyed over something since she had last spoken to him and for a moment she hesitated with her plan given the current circumstances.

"I just stopped in to talk to Marcus," Danny explained the obvious anyway as he couldn't help but instantly feel the need to became a little defensive about his presence there. "Linda wanted me to have him look into the baby thing. What can I do for you?" he hedged to break the now uncomfortable silence between them. "Is the kid alright?"

"Jamie? Oh yeah, he just called me. Annabel was there," she reported with what he misperceived as emphasis and she once again noticed a definite flinch in his reaction as he was indeed caught off guard with that announcement wondered if the young cop had inadvertently mentioned the call they were on from earlier in the morning and that his younger brother had started to put things together. Despite his father's orders, Danny was having a hard time reconciling himself to the fact that they were keeping Jamie out of the loop once more and it was yet another thing that was pushing him to the edge.

"Oh, his rookie… so he's allowing some more visitors in… that's good, right? He must be doing better," he swallowed as there was something about the way Eddie was looking at him that told him she knew more than she should about the current threat against the family. Damn, maybe he _was_ losing it trying to juggle too much himself and was off his game as Renzulli had emphatically pointed out this morning. "I'll have to get up there and see him again."

"Yes, he said he had a good day in rehab and they even left his brace angled more. He was happy about that," Eddie informed him evenly as she was puzzled with his response to that bit of benign news even as Danny's phone lit up with a returned call that he confirmed with what appeared to be a nervous glance downward. "Do you need to get that?" she pried with intent.

"You a cop or a reporter?" his reaction was suddenly cold and challenging as she was presented with another side to Daniel Reagan and he was determined to put the shoe on the other foot to make her equally uncomfortable to see if she would divulge anything as they stood together in the hall in a momentary standoff matching wits. "It's a case I'm working on… nothing for you or the kid to worry about," he assured flatly as he made it obvious through his tone that their conversation was over and he intended to answer the call.

"Oh, okay," Eddie conceded as she nervously chewed her lip given the change of temperature in their conversation as his device buzzed once more. "I have to get back upstairs to my desk anyway," she explained before beginning to move off. "Tell Linda I said hi and I hope everything works out with Marcus."

"I'll do that, thanks," he countered and turned to walk towards the entrance with his phone up to his ear as he answered the call, not realizing that she had turned to follow so was still within earshot and intended to do something about it. "Yeah… sorry. Ten minutes at Marconi's… that dive on the corner of West 125th and 12th. Right… see you then… there's been some uh, more developments," he added before pushing his way through the door and out into the street as Eddie made a split second decision to run upstairs and sign out, determined to follow him and at least get a glance at whoever he was meeting there… her spidey senses as Jamie liked to call them were tingling on fire with suspicion now. Something was definitely going on with the older Reagan brother and she was determined to prove herself and figure out what it could be.

"So much for going home and putting my feet up as promised," she huffed, choosing to ignore the fact that she was a bit out of breath from her recent inactivity and added munchie weight after going upstairs to retrieve her purse and coat before hurrying outside to her car.

* * *

 _Hm, so Eddie seems determined to go off on a side expedition to conduct a little spy mission on her brother-in-law which might leave her with a majorly wrong impression at first, while next, Jamie likewise confronts Rigs head on before a heartbreaking secret is revealed._

 _Special thanks to BlueBlood82 for helping me navigate that bit with the NY adoption codes._


	88. Chapter 88

Chapter 88

"You comfortable, Reagan?" Rigsby's voice came through the doorway, and while it was exactly what Jamie had been hoping would happen and a confrontation he would unknowingly draw on for strength in a pivotal moment just over three months from now on a lonely hillside, he still groaned inwardly at that biting tone… this wasn't going to be easy. Somehow this man had an ingrained radar for quitters or maybe rather an astute sense for the smell of fear, and in this case given the fact that he had failed miserably once again to make any progress on this damn one-sided recumbent bike, well, there was no need for play acting at all on this aspect. Despite his intentions for this encounter––the careful planning for which had kept him up half the night determining the right approach, he _was_ still afraid––very afraid now that he wouldn't be able to pull this off, and without help from Kenzie and the rest of these men he knew this aspect of his life was not going to get better anytime soon. He was as desperate as any one of them here now and knew that Rigs sensed that anxiety, guessing it was a skill set that made the Commander so good at his job as a Navy SEAL instructor since it made short work of weeding out the eventual failures.

And that's just how he felt at the moment––a total, abject washout. No matter how hard he had tried, he just couldn't force himself to push that pedal over the apex to make one revolution on its own. One. He had gone from training for a full marathon to being unable to lift his leg with any muscle coordination while forcing his toes front and back enough to achieve one effing rotation on this goddamn instrument of unholy torture and had dragged himself off of it in frustration only to remain lying there in a puddle of sweat ready to give up on everything since all that effort had obviously been in vain, anyway. Now he was stuck there on the floor like a fish out of water, too exhausted from his efforts and recent bout of flu to generate the energy required to crawl back up into the wheelchair.

"Because I can get you a little accent pillow and maybe some potpourri to match if you're just going to lay there like a goddamn throw rug."

"I tried, didn't I?" Jamie bit back in real frustration although he somehow managed a continued determination not to let himself get distracted and pass on this golden opportunity to look for an opening to test his theory now that they were alone. "I TRIED MY BEST, DAMN IT! But it just wasn't good enough! It won't move no matter how hard... I just can't do it!"

"YET!" Rigs added, and the word cracked like a whip off his tongue and echoed in the empty space of the gym at this hour. "You forgot to add the word 'yet', as in 'I tried my absolute best tonight, Commander Rigsby, but it just wasn't good enough, YET, sir!' Otherwise you sound like a damn sugar cookie. Do you want to know what that is?"

"Why do I have a feeling I don't have a choice in the matter, and it probably has nothing to do with Cupcake's hidden confectionary talents," came the defeated voice from the floor, knowing he was going to be cornered now and not likely to avoid the coming lecture. "Pretty sure I can guess the gist, but go ahead and give it to me straight, anyway… I figured it wasn't something Quince just made up."

"So get up and leave if you don't want to listen to me!" Rigs barked back without sympathy as he stepped in the room and closed the door before taking a seat while offering Jamie no assistance as he explained in detail the origin of the term sugar cookie which basically boiled down to understanding that sometimes no matter how well you prepare or how hard you try, you are never going to succeed on every effort and still might end up as an overt failure that day. "It's just the way life is sometimes," the Commander concluded. "The ones that accepted that and came back the next time anyway were the ones that made it through. So which is it gonna be, Reagan?" Rigs challenged. "You're up and down and got so many other damn things on your mind that frankly I'm on the fence now about you being able to see this to the end."

"Are you?" Jamie returned in frustration. "You had me pegged as being too soft to do it on my own from the beginning, anyway. So why waste your time in here if there wasn't something else to it?"

"YOU TELL ME!" Rigs volleyed back with vigor. "You're assuming I was giving you the benefit of the doubt in the first place, well you're right! I didn't think you had a snowball's chance in hell when I saw them roll your sorry little ivy-league ass in here! The only reason I got involved in the first place is because your case is so important to Kenzie and everyone else like Quincy who needs this to work! He doesn't have anyone else to fall back on! I figured if you didn't have us pushing then you'd ring the damn bell and run home to hide in your blue-blooded mansion in Bay Ridge when things got tough, and then she'd lose her funding and _my_ men would suffer when it hit the press that her study failed the mighty New York City Police Commissioner's son, and yet here you are on the floor by yourself still trying even though you've failed all week and were pretty damn sick a few days ago. Something's changed in you since then, and I guess maybe that proves you're tougher than I gave you credit for. So I _was_ wrong, AND I DON'T MISJUDGE PEOPLE VERY OFTEN!" he thundered.

"I know you don't, and you were right for calling me out in the beginning… I needed that, and I haven't been handling any of this in a good way at all until now," Jamie softened abruptly, somewhat surprised at that reveal about gaining a modicum of the Commander's respect. "My mother-in-law of all damn people showed me that I have to be honest with myself and Eddie because it's not fair to her to try to hide what's going on with me, is it? I finally realized that when I got sick at home and scared the crap out of everyone again, but we talked it out and I've got my head on straight now so I'm not gonna quit… I want to make it through this to be better for my family, especially my wife and little girl. No matter what it takes I'll be here trying to make that effing thing move again tomorrow and the next day and the one after that until it finally works," he dutifully promised.

"Well then, that's a start," the Commander commented cautiously, although with a slight suspicious frown on his face as he sensed somehow he was being played with this apparent turnaround and its emphasis on honesty, plus he had to acknowledge that he was still having a difficult time reading this younger man since his return. "At least you're admitting to it, and that as they say is the first step," he chuffed with irony given the circumstances.

"First step… yeah, maybe, but not yet, right? 'Cause if anything this was another one of your so-called big sugar cookie kind of flops… still can't move my foot," Jamie continued with a deflated sigh.

"Then it's not your leg that's holding you back, it's your head, _Ice,"_ Rigs counseled with emphasis on that chosen nickname which purposefully revealed one of Jamie's weaknesses. "Your mind can tell your body to do whatever it needs to help itself if you know how to use it the right way."

"You're sure about that?" Jamie quipped insolently as he considered his own past history and what was likely going on with the other man in the room.

"Do you know why SEAL recruits train in the cold water off of San Diego?"

"No, Commander, sir… please enlighten me."

"Wiseass," Rigs huffed. "It's not to toughen up their bodies… land drills and calisthenics can do that. It's to teach their brains to learn to cope while under an assault. Ocean temperatures at best there are 69 degrees during the warmest of the summer and drop in the low 50s in the winter. So in dive phase at about 15 feet underwater, you'll probably hit a thermocline in the low 40's. As your core temp drops, so does your ability to function. The best recruits have the mental fortitude to focus and fight that off for longer than the others by telling their bodies to do what everyone else thinks is physically impossible… to keep themselves warm. The doc's we have on hand to monitor them call them freaks of nature, but that's their strength and it's inside all of us."

"Really? 'Cause it doesn't seem like I ever got that memo."

"What happened to you last week when you got the flu?"

"I wound up sick with a high fever," Jamie answered even as he remembered back to the previous winter and his own near deadly bout with hyperthermia trapped in cold water under a beam in a collapsed building while he considered where the Commander was going with this.

"So your body… your brain… recognized a damn-near invisible microscopic virus as a threat and generated enough heat to warm itself up to a hundred-and-some-odd plus degrees and keep it there for hours to deal with the problem even though they juiced you with meds had a great big pile of freezing cold blankets on you all that time. If it has the ability to do that, then why the hell don't you think it could have saved you before? Maybe because you didn't believe it could!" he answered his own question before continuing. "Now you're lying here moaning about not being able to move or help yourself again. It's not your leg's fault! The nerves are working… Kenzie said so, didn't she?"

"Yeah, she told me that was looking much better now," Jamie admitted as the conduction tests run the other day had shown a marked improvement after his last surgery and when the machine had sent electric signals to his muscles, they had been received although his efforts to show the same results here on his own through these rehab exercises were hitting a wall much like Annabel had in her marathon training. _Sounds more mental than anything else,_ he had warned her during their talk just hours ago and she had agreed. Maybe it was time to listen to his own advice.

"Then you need to find a way to get out of your head so it can do it on its own."

"So, is this something you've got from the start or can you learn to control it through some kind of biofeedback?" Jamie questioned with interest even as they went back off topic and he was still trying to figure out a way to turn the conversation more towards his primary objective before he wasted this prime opportunity. Somehow he needed to clear the Commander by getting whatever his closely held top secret condition was out in the open without in any way revealing the fact that there was an undercover operation currently taking place and that Oliver Wendell, and by extension Dr. Charlotte McKenzie, was under FBI investigation because of it. After much soul searching he had determined the best route was to use a very personal and painful parallel from his own life to break Rigs down, if that was even possible, and have him make a public admission using guilt and an evident fatherly allegiance to Quincy.

"Reagan, what the hell do you think all our training is for?" Rigs bit back as he continued on with his own tirade. "Of course if you're tough enough you can learn to control it, otherwise what would be the point? We could just throw all the newbies in an ice bath the first day and weed out the ones that turned blue first. That would save the glorious United States Navy and myself the hassle of dealing with the rest of the ones like you," he added with a snort of contempt. "After all this time do I need to spell out again how that's done?"

"Those rules of yours," Jamie surmised and after an awkward pause between the two before he finally saw a crack in the door and decided to go headfirst and get to the heart of the matter after things between them had ironically warmed to a degree and Rigs seemed unsuspecting now that he had been allowed to make his point. "How many are there again?"

"Ten by my count."

"So then what are we up to now, seven or eight?" Jamie asked before continuing. "Because Quincy explained the one about the sharks and you're right, I know that's probably my biggest fault," he admitted honestly before pushing himself up on his elbows, resigned to the fact that he was going to have to figure out a way to get back in that wheelchair alone, especially given what was planned next as there would be no help forthcoming from Rigs who was seated solidly near the door with no apparent intention of moving. "I'm always looking around too hard at stuff and worrying about everyone else so I don't focus on myself... and when something happens, and it's about my family or people I care about, I guess I just expect the worst is around the corner," he added apologetically while offering an apparent olive branch to mend the intentional rift he had started given his plan had worked as hoped and had succeeded in flushing Rigs out of his room. "Like with Eddie and the baby… thinking about that and not paying attention to anything else is what got me in this mess in the first place."

"An attitude like that is only gonna hold you back, son," Riggs nodded, initially pleased that it seemed some progress had been made on that front and that Jamie was willing to consider his failings. "We're all here for a reason. You've gotta learn to trust what I'm telling you and focus, just like Quincy does… because that's what's gonna see him through this time. He'll put everything he has into walking again or quit over my dead body."

 _Okay, so here it goes then since you brought that up… all or nothing,_ his other protégé thought as he took a deep breath with a heavy heart and continued.

"I know… and maybe it's the way I'm wired because I've been like that all my life, but it's been more of a problem ever since I lost my older brother Joe on the job and especially my mom to _cancer,"_ Jamie added that last word seemingly out of the blue with just the smallest amount of emphasis on it to test his theory as to what was behind Rigs' true presence here.

"That so?" the Commander answered evenly without the slightest evident outward reaction… not a twitch or a change of inflection, exactly as expected for a man with the extensive psychological training to maintain secrets he possessed, although Jamie thought he might have detected just the slightest narrowing of those green eyes now lasered in on him so decided to press on.

"Yeah, they both kept things they shouldn't have from me before they died," he continued deliberately while trying to maintain a strong edge to his voice even as the emotion of this confrontation was threatening to break through and get the better of him. "But my mom found out she was sick just after I was home from college for Thanksgiving and decided not to tell me because she was worried that knowing would wreck my chances for staying at the top of my class through the end of that semester so I would get offered the top internship and stay away from the family business. She hated the thought of me being a cop and in the end that's what she cared about more… my future career as a lawyer instead of what was happening to her right then and our relationship. She hid it and by the time I came home after exams, it was too late… we were so close my whole life and she died before I even had the chance to talk to her and tell her how I felt about staying in school… that I wasn't happy and wanted to come home and go to the academy. I… I hated her for taking that away from me, and it took years to forgive her," he revealed with a pointed break for a deep breath before adding with a fixed gaze and Henry's mantra of asking a question like you know the answer rolling through his head as his heart quickened and to the very last second he hoped that he was wrong. "I would never want to see someone else go through the same thing… you know?"

"What the hell are you saying?"

"I'm saying you're right… we _are_ all here for a reason, aren't we? I got hit by an effing car right after meeting Kenzie by the grace of God; Quincy's here because she made a promise to him that started all of this trial stuff, but you… you're here for something else aren't you?" Jamie challenged openly as he finally had enough of dancing around and turned the tables to go on the offensive.

"AND WHAT MAKES YOU THINK THAT'S ANY OF YOUR GODDAMN BUSINESS?" Rigs finally reacted in that aforementioned grizzly way and swiped back with a deep growl.

"YOU DID!… You made it my business when you paired me up with Quince. Why was that? There's more to it then just being worried about the study. Is it because you wanted someone else to look out for him in case something happened to you? He's been there for me since I got here, and because of that now I _do_ give an honest damn about him!… Happy? That's what you wanted, right? Enough so that I turned myself into a freaking matchmaker and brought my rookie partner here tonight to meet him because he has eyes for her and he's been kinda doubting himself this week… afraid he's gonna fail again and let you and Kenzie down which is something I've never heard him say before. Did you know that?"

The break in that normally firm gaze as Rigs' eyes dropped to the floor while he refused to answer was the first true indication the plan was working and he was sadly on target with his assumptions so Jamie took a deep breath and continued.

"He thinks you're here for a broken shoulder, but it's not that, right? Or maybe it was when you started, but not now… it's gotta be something worse otherwise you would have had the implant surgery and be rehabbing in here with us. You're the one that Wendell said got kicked out of the study, aren't you? And you weren't sick last week like Quincy thought… you were taking a treatment or something else in that IV that made you feel like crap, weren't you? It's because you're doing the same thing to him that Mom did to me isn't it?" Jamie continued to hammer in a run of nearly one breath without apparent mercy before he lost his nerve as he sought to have the truth revealed. "You know this is his last chance to walk and you want to see him through it because he doesn't have anyone else there for him, but you're afraid to tell him because it might set everything back again. Please don't do that!" he pleaded in earnest and although he had an ulterior motive for wanting Rigs to come out in the open with his condition, the knowledge that he had been correct all along was sending icy waves through his own heart and his concern was genuine for the relationship between both of these men he now considered friends. "I've been there, and it hurts more than anything you can imagine… don't take that time away and make him hate you for it."

"I had to pick a goddamn cop," Rigs swore under his breath and berated himself for that choice as he sat back and looked up at the ceiling shaking his head, not anticipating anyone else would have put the pieces together so soon before Quincy was on his proverbial feet and indeed having misjudged the son of the city's Police Commissioner although he had little intention of doing what was no doubt about to be asked of him.

"That whole part before about being honest was a damn lie then, wasn't it? We all have secrets that we aren't willing to talk about now, Reagan, don't we?" he countered as he looked back up and could clearly see there was a reaction brimming up now that the cat was out of the bag although the Commander was evidently already reading more into the situation and preparing to turn this around on Jamie himself instead of making the desired admission. "There's something else behind this change, isn't there? Because otherwise I have to ask myself why someone like you is so eager to stay here now and nose around where you don't belong."

"Have you seen who my family is and where I come from? Figuring out stuff like that is in my blood," Jamie deflected. "Just because I'm stuck here and messed up from the accident doesn't mean I can shut it off… that's how my brain works on its own and maybe what makes me a freak of nature the same way as those recruits you were talking about and your own need to look out after your men no matter what… why do you walk around and check on everyone at night when the nurses are on duty and that's their job? But Quincy's different, isn't he? He's special for other reasons because somewhere along the line he became family to you, and that's hard to let go of... I feel it too," Jamie admitted as his eyes finally glassed over while he revealed his emotion. "I've only known him a short time, but he's already like one of my brothers, and I've been blessed with a couple of good ones before this so I know what that's like."

"So suppose you're right, and I'm _not_ sayin' you are," Rigs offered a veiled confirmation. "What do you want from me?

"If it's that bad… God, I'm so sorry; it is, isn't it?" Jamie questioned while his resolve deepened to keep his own secret intact for now even as he considered what that meant to the larger-than-life man before him and the familiar crushing blow this would be to his younger friend. "But then it's better coming from you, don't you see that? I swear to you I will be there for him 'cause it's gonna tear him apart, but I want you to be honest with Quince," he swallowed hard, knowing what he was asking and praying that a final nudge would be enough to push things over the line. "Or I will," he added firmly.

"You will what, Ice?" came a voice from another neither had expected nor noticed approaching given the intensity of their conversation. "Be honest with me about what?" Quincy demanded again as he wheeled up from behind them from the opposite side of the gym as the big, easy smile that had been etched on his face for the last several hours while visiting with Annabel was quickly slipping away as he sensed the level of tension ratchet up in the room.

"C'mon, guys, what's going on here?"

* * *

 _Poor Quincy is about to be crushed and angry in his own right as he discovers the truth just when things were looking up for him there and in a bit of a role reversal, Jamie's going to have to shift and be the strong, optimistic one to help his friend pull it together. So Rigs' secret is out of the bag now with the details to be revealed in the next chapter, and he'll soon be cleared in the FBI investigation, but there's still a bit of work to do at Columbia before all this and the things on the other side of the coin come out in the open as Eddie is poised to be pulled headfirst into the heart of the Templar investigation herself in an unlikely manner._

 _Good news! I'm close to wrapping up the last chapters of this one, so we can go back to the Tuesday/Thursday schedule for posting now to see this one out. If you're reading this, thanks for sticking with it and please do leave a review to let me know you're here._


	89. Chapter 89

Chapter 89

"Marconi's on the corner of West 125th and 12th," Eddie directed her voice-activated GPS on her fancy-shmancy tech-heavy SUV. "Marconi's, I think that's a little hole-in-a-wall pizza bar over there, isn't it? I wonder why Danny would be heading that way this late? Jamie would probably know if it's one of his usual spots..." she questioned herself and then decided against a call to her husband since she had assured him earlier she would be headed home to relax while she tried to recall the neighborhood just out of the 5-4's jurisdiction near the Henry Hudson Parkway as she sped towards the address, set on figuring out just what was going on with her antsy, distracted brother-in-law and exactly who he was meeting there tonight.

"Danny might recognize my car, but he'll never expect that I followed him here… dark, late model SUV… there's thousands of them in the city… still maybe I should come in from the other direction," Eddie reasoned as she failed to pick up on the fact that she herself had drawn the attention of an interested and very skilled pair of eyes who had turned the tables and likewise followed her at a distance from the 12th without revealing their presence.

"Ha! And there he is," Eddie took a deep breath and patted herself on the back as her heart pounded with the thrill of the chase when she went around the block and turned the opposite corner. She slowly pulled her car to the curb on the other side of the street after spotting Danny still sitting in his green Jeep parked just a few car lengths from the front door of Marconi's Pizza Pub, seemingly waiting for whoever this mysterious contact of his was. "Good lord, lambchop… he's just your brother-in-law, it's not like you're tailing John Gotti or anything… you need to calm yourself down if you ever want to do something like this for real," she berated herself since surely that gold badge she was pursuing would require steadier nerves in the field than this. "I don't even know what you're doing here anyway… you're probably so off on thinking this has anything to do with what's going on with Jamie's accident… I bet he's just meeting some two-bit CI for one of the other cases he's working on, but if that was it he shouldn't be doing that alone, right? Unless…"

"OH, HOLY CRAP!" Eddie gasped and her hands flew to her mouth in disbelief after watching Danny get out of his vehicle and walk up to the small, compact silver sedan that had just parked behind the Jeep, pausing to open up the driver's side door in a gentlemanly fashion before leaning inside in what she could only imagine from her somewhat blocked vantage point was a shocking bit of PDA before lending his assistance to an unknown but rather beautiful and obviously familiar-to-him tallish brunette as she exited.

"NO WAY!… Nuh-uh! DANIEL REAGAN! I did NOT just see that!" she fumed with the assumption made and verged on hyperventilating while her mind raced to make sense of this totally unexpected turn of events. Surely there was some other way to explain what was right before her very eyes… Danny escorting this… this… Eddie wasn't even sure how to define the woman dressed in nice heels and a stylish overcoat who appeared to have a bit of a limp as she watched while he took her by the arm before the pair entered the somewhat nondescript, out-of-the way pub's front door.

"Oh my God! What the hell am I supposed to do now?!" she wailed to herself and sat frozen at the wheel of her car, feeling very conspicuous behind the tinted glass despite her previous smugness about staying concealed out of Danny's sight. "It's not like I can unsee _that!_ I'll never be able to look Linda in the eyes again if I don't figure out what is going on!" she determined even as a slight sheen of sweat dampened her brow despite the cold, dry weather permeating the air outside. "Maybe I can just drive by and catch the license plate and then do a search at work tomorrow… but that's not going to tell me what's going on in there now…" Eddie continued to waffle back and forth, suddenly very sorry she had allowed herself to come up with this stupid plan in the first place and had not listened to her husband who had urged her to go home after work to relax and put her feet up for the baby's sake. Surely Jamie would be having an absolute fit right now if he knew how high her blood pressure had just climbed. "Oh, geez! What if he's having an affair? No, that can't be right… not Danny, he would never dare do something like that to his family… would he?"

"Alright, get it together, Janko," Eddie tried to fortify herself after a few more moments of stressing. "This is nuts!… You want to be a detective so you can't be jumping to these conclusions without proof… solid, indisputable proof, right? That's what you need so you're gonna get out of this car, walk over there like there's nothing wrong, take a peek in one of those windows to see what they're doing, then write down that plate number and get the hell out of here! Like now before it's too late!" she urged her reluctant legs to step out of the vehicle and proceeded to cross the street before gingerly making her way towards the pub after first pausing to wrap a scarf over her head to cover her conspicuous mane of blonde hair. "Okay, here goes," she added with a deep breath before momentarily glancing sideways through each of the exterior old open storefront windows as she walked by. Her nerves were nearly frayed by the time she passed the front door and then the final pane of glass on the left which finally revealed her quarry leaning in a little too close for comfort in a booth behind a half wall near the back in a private small alcove off what appeared to be the kitchen entrance.

"Daniel Reagan what are you doing with her all the way back there?! I swear to God if it's what it looks like then I'll kill you myself and hide the body where no one will ever find it so Linda doesn't have to!" she declared as she took a heavy breath while propping herself up against the brick front to gather some courage together before deciding to go all in and find out for herself as she turned heel and made her way inside.

Her actions had not gone unnoticed by that interested third party though, and his fingers were quick to find a familiar speed dial number before a deep, baritone voice answered the call.

###

"Hey, Quince, what are you doing all the way back there?... Jesus, man, I've been looking everywhere, and I was starting to get scared you might have left the building. Are you alright?" Jamie asked with concern after he had finally managed to track down his roommate in a dark, quiet corner area off a remote hall on the floor above the now empty gym. It had taken several minutes of determinedly inching his way across the floor to get back up into his wheelchair by himself when the other two had abruptly departed to continue an obviously private but short part of the heartbreaking conversation elsewhere. A half hour of worried searching was required following that before he found Quincy sitting alone and staring out the dark window beyond with his back to the rest of the world as he tried to process the news which had just shocked him to the very core.

"How'd you figure it out when I didn't?" the younger man finally managed to rasp out hoarsely from his tight throat, his mind now reeling with the notion that the person who had served as the closest thing to a father figure he had ever known in his entire life was evidently just a mere mortal and not superhuman after all. "I've been around him for years, and I thought we were… I mean I thought if anything happened he would at least..." he trailed off unable to say the rest. "I just thought he was just here for something… you know, fixable."

"I didn't know for sure… not at first. I guessed. It was something about the way he looked lately that reminded me of my mom and knowing that someone was kicked out of the study… I just put it all together. My brain works like that sometimes. Quince, I'm really sorry," Jamie apologized again as he drew closer while cursing himself for the pain his actions were causing and yet still fluffing over the other details behind the need for this to come out in the open. He had tried numerous times to say he was sorry without being heard prior to being abruptly abandoned when Quincy had enough and angrily wheeled himself away before Rigs went after him to explain the details. "I never meant for it to come out like that. Maybe it wasn't my place... I just wanted him to talk to you because I didn't want you to go through what I did," he added honestly even though there was an unspoken added reason behind that plan. "My mom found out she had cancer when I was away at law school and died before I realized what was going on at home or she could tell me herself," he explained the similarity succinctly. "It really messed me up for a long time."

"Did she have effing stage four lung cancer that's inoperable because it's wrapped around all kinds of stuff in the middle of his chest and spread to the bones already, like Rigs?" Quincy asked with acid venom evident at the improbable situation as Jamie's heart fell with the dreaded confirmation of the tragic news he feared most. Not only was Rigs sick, but more than likely terminal too. "Did you know Kenzie took out half his shoulder blade and collarbone and then told him no matter what's done after that he's only got a fifty-fifty chance of making it another six months?! Now there's spots showing up in his spine too..." Quincy revealed and choked back incredulously as he was still trying to absorb the gut wrenching news that had just been delivered. "I can't imagine… How could no one know before this?! You can't tell me he didn't!" he added angrily without waiting for an answer. "Stupid damn Rigs probably just ignored it because he didn't want anyone to find out and he thinks he's so tough he can beat anything all the time!"

"No, hers was in the pancreas, but sometimes they don't, Quince," Jamie answered sadly. "She honestly didn't. I realize that now and when they told her what it was, she thought she had more time. It wasn't even a month later for her… she planned to tell me right after my exams, but never got the chance. I got really angry at her for that too, but you said yourself his shoulder's been sore on and off for years since he was shot there. He probably didn't think anything else was wrong. I bet it wasn't until the pain got bad or the bone actually broke and Kenzie pulled it out a couple of weeks ago to fix it that they found out about the rest. I'm sure he never realized it was something more serious. You said yourself he was planning on going back to California for the start of his new training class in a couple of months. Why would he say that otherwise?"

"Why wouldn't he tell me the truth when he did know?" Quincy railed back, still focused on the perceived breach of faith in the situation just as Jamie feared.

"Because you're like me now, and how Mom thought I was back then," he reasoned. "Fragile... just out of surgery and starting rehab. I'm sure he just wanted to give you some time to get stronger first. You're not the only one people have been keeping stuff from because of that," Jamie admitted as he considered his own brother's current actions which were becoming more and more suspect by the day.

"I'm a goddamn Navy SEAL," Quincy defended weakly in his honor as his shoulders slumped even as guilt was seeping in that what Jamie had just said was true and how he was being viewed by a man he had fought successfully to prove himself to over the years. "At least I was… guess he doesn't think so anymore," he added, feeling outright betrayal now. "'Cause there ain't nothing 'bout me that outta be fragile."

"Except that you are right now, and so am I," Jamie countered. "We've gotta be honest and admit that, but that doesn't mean it's gonna stay that way and we're gonna get through this together, Quince... I promise. I didn't think so at first, but I know after watching you that one of these days no matter what it takes we'll both walk out of here together. Now where is Rigs? You need to be saying this stuff to him. I'm surprised he left you alone like this."

"Told him there wasn't much left to talk about since he didn't want me to know in the first place."

"Look, I get it," Jamie sighed with regret at being the lynchpin now in what had come between the other two close-knit men. "I've been right where you are in this, and I know how you're feeling right now… alone and angry... so believe me when I say you'll regret pushing him away if things go bad. I'd give up almost anything to be able to have that talk with my mom."

"Is that why you brought Annie to visit?" Quincy demanded roughly, still without looking behind him as he continued to try without success to fight back the tears that he was ashamed to allow, but needed to come fast and furious now as the brightest spot in his life lately had been instantly and almost completely tarnished and overshadowed with Rigs' shocking revelation. "'Cause you felt sorry for me? Was it out of pity for the poor lonely cripple?" he rasped in evident defeat. "Was she in on it too?"

"No, of course not! C'mon, don't say that!" Jamie sighed even if he had to admit to himself that was part of it as he rolled forward and put his hand on his friend's shoulder. "Annabel came here to see me because I asked her to, but she really liked you… I could tell, so if that's what you think of yourself, you're the only one," he assured in his father's oft-time familiar words.

"I don't know how I'm gonna do this alone again," Quincy admitted as he was shaking now as they got down to the core of his insecurity. "Every time… first my Gram died when I was hurt too bad to even do one damn thing to give her a respectful funeral… she was so upset about what happened to me over there and how I came back it gave her a heart attack. Then they cremated her and sent what was left to me in a box when I was in a hospital down in Virginia. I had to keep my grandma… the only mother I ever knew... on a shelf in a goddamn closet in an effing cardboard box for six months before I could get out and do anything proper, and now him... You're better off staying away from me, Ice. I'm just bad luck. It ain't worth it… maybe none of this is!" he asserted before suddenly spinning his chair sideways hard, the notion of experiencing such a loss again now suddenly overwhelming. He'd had enough of this talk and was determined to make an exit… from the sound of it perhaps not only from the room but from the entire study.

"Quincy, WAIT! You're not a bad any… thing… oh my God," Jamie started as his friend's chair jolted to a stop and they both stared down fixed and stupefied at the ground. On reflex and without thinking he had kicked out his injured leg in the loosened brace and stretched his foot forward to wedge it in front of the small left wheel of Quincy's wheelchair successfully to prevent his escape. Now it remained there as his brain tried to comprehend the fact that something which had seemed impossible only a few short minutes ago after a complete failure on that damn recumbent bike had suddenly happened on its own.

"It moved," he breathed, almost afraid to acknowledge the fact or even blink in case he was imagining things. "I think it moved."

"Do it again," Quincy swallowed hard as even in his current puddled state he recognized the momentous step that had just occurred in Jamie's recovery… one that could not be ignored no matter the circumstances as he swapped momentarily back over to his normal encouraging self, even if it was just for a minute.

"NOW! C'mon, Ice… do it again!"

"I… I'm trying… but..."

"NO BUTS! Don't try! JUST DO IT!"

"There… wait… I think… maybe..." Jamie finally managed as his toe came up and went back down just slightly. "THERE! Oh, thank you, sweet Jesus! Quincy, look, it really moved! I can use it again!" he demonstrated the slight motion several more times before grinning and looked up as both men had tears in their eyes amid the virtual cauldron of swinging emotions swirling around them.

"Yeah, you sure can," Quincy acknowledged with a somewhat sad huff as despite the change in focus there was still a heavy sadness etching away at his heart that could not be erased. "You did good, Ice… you're gonna make it for sure now."

"No, _we_ will. C'mon..."

"Maybe… but hey, you should go call your wife; she needs to hear what's happened. You're really lucky to have her, and the rest of your family oughta know. Go ahead," Quincy tried to encourage even though his own sense of loss and loneliness was being exacerbated by the fact that should he ever have such a breakthrough on his own, it was likely now there would be no one left to share it with. "I can take care of myself… always did, and it's probably better it stays that way."

"Quince, no it isn't," Jamie reiterated his previous interrupted thought with conviction. "That's enough. I don't ever want to hear you say that again. Listen, and I'm telling the truth when I say this… you are _never_ gonna be alone no matter what. I swear on my life, do you hear me? You _are_ like family to me now… a brother, and with that comes a whole bunch of other people because there is nothing private in my family, and I gotta warn you we're Irish, stubborn and crazy at times. You said you would help with my little girl, and what's your second rule? Needing help to paddle? Well, I do for this and a whole lot of other stuff, and like it or not, so do you. Rigs put us together for that reason, and I owe him for that because I never would have got to this point on my own. I told him that straight out and I made a promise I intend to keep, so I'm not gonna let you sell yourself or him short. Is _he_ quitting?" he asked bluntly.

"No, I don't think the man even knows there's a definition for that," Quincy revealed sadly as he could see what Jamie was trying to do. "Kenzie got some top-rate oncologist to see him. There's not much of a chance, but he's taking some pretty strong experimental immuno-something treatments for the next couple of weeks to see if it'll make a difference, anyway."

"Then are you really willing to doubt him even if the odds are bad? He's badass, and from what I've seen, so are you. If there's a way for you guys to beat whatever you're up against, you will. You're just about the bravest, strongest guy I've ever met, Quincy Owen Johnson, and that's saying something considering where I come from."

"Quincy Owen… now that's something I haven't heard in forever. Not since my Gram would grab me by the scruff of the neck if she ever caught me getting into trouble. How'd you even know what my middle name was?"

"I'm a cop, remember?" Jamie covered since he had slipped there just slightly with intel provided by Agent Sisco which had included details about every patient and staff member on the floor. "Besides, I can read and every scan they take has our full names on them… must have picked it up there. See, that Grandma thing though…" he diverted backwards. "That's something else we have in common… well maybe you and Danny more than me. Mine used to do that too right before she'd kneel us down in the corner on her kitchen floor when we were bad," he explained and laughed just a little. "I was the baby of the family so he always got it worse than me no matter who was at fault."

"Never thought that'd be something I'd miss so much," Quincy admitted as he looked down at his mismatched legs and wondered if such a thing would ever be possible again. With the bone graft healing now in Kenzie's effort to spare him at least a short bit of femur which could be used to hold a functional prosthesis in place just below his hip… soon would come the painful and previously nearly impossible task of fitting one properly and attempting to learn how to use it. "I guess I didn't appreciate it enough at the time."

"Me either, so we're not gonna do that here. Now c'mon… we're going to find Rigs so the two of you can work some of this out, and I'm gonna call Ed because you're right, I'm lucky to have her and she needs to know what's happened... we've got a lot to talk about now."

* * *

 _So poor Rigs does have another reason for being at Columbia, and it's not looking good for him or Quincy right now, even as things have seesawed back and forth a bit with Jamie's own huge breakthrough. Next, Eddie initially misconstrues an overheard conversation and demands an explanation after an oopsie when that aforementioned phone blows her cover._

 _For those of you wondering, I'm guessing we'll end up somewhere around ~105 chapters in this one, plus a 2 chapter epilogue that will post after the conclusion of the next installment._


	90. Chapter 90

Chapter 90

Despite her previous resolve to stay calmer and more collected, further south in the city at that very moment Eddie's heart was still beating what seemed like a million times a minute as she quickly and deliberately took a seat on the opposite side of the high-walled booth, determined to eavesdrop long just long enough to assure herself that her brother-in-law was not in fact stepping out in any way, shape, or form on her soul-sister so that she could indeed face Linda again without guilt. What she was about to discover, however, would send far-reaching shock waves through her own household as the truth behind her husband's accident and what the family already knew about it would come to light and beg her to go back on that honesty pact with Jamie almost from its conception.

"So what'll it be, Reagan?" came the ill-perceived sultry voice from the other side of the half wall. "The usual for old time's sake? Been awhile since we've been here together, I've actually missed this place."

"That Greek pizza with those weird red onions, and what else? Olives and that funky white clumpy cheese crap you always craved when we were out together late at night? That stuff'll kill you."

"It's called feta, Danny."

"Whatever… no way. Give me Staten Island-style with extra mozzarella and pepperoni any day. Besides, Linda can smell those onions before I get out of the car. She'd know exactly where I've been, and who I was with," he added with a little laugh as Eddie nearly choked and struggled to stay silent as she once again misread the apparent situation from not three feet away.

"So she still doesn't know about me, right?"

"That we're back together doing this again after all these years? No way, and now's not the time to have her find out if I can help it… not with all this baby stuff going on; that's been making her crazy enough as it is," Danny revealed as his sister-in-law's Serbian temper began to unfurl at that evident crass reference to his wife's miscarriage, not knowing of course that Jackie had already expressed her sincere sympathy for Linda's loss when he had shared that close personal information given the fact that Jackie could read him like a book, or that she herself had turned an ankle over slightly after getting a heel caught in a storm grate before arriving here and that had been the impetus for his close attendance on her arm when they made their way inside. "She'd kill me if she knew where I was right now considering everything else that's happening. What about this Bobby guy of yours? What d'you tell him?"

"The truth… that I was going to be out shopping for a rehearsal dinner dress in the city tonight and meeting an old friend for dinner, can you imagine?" came a smug little laugh to accompany it that rippled through Eddie and had her clenching her fists so tightly her nails were digging into the palms of her hands. "That's why I'm so overdressed for this joint."

"Well, you look great," Danny innocently complimented his former partner before preparing to get down to the brass tacks of the matter. "I never thought after we'd get a chance to be like this after the way we left things last time, Jack."

"I didn't leave because I wanted to," Jackie assured as Eddie's mouth dropped open once more and she had to steady herself against the distinct dizzying feeling of being thrust into a _Twilight Zone_ episode. How had she misjudged her brother-in-law for so long when he was capable of this? "I walked out because of the situation, and maybe I didn't want to admit that this could happen again, but it is, isn't it?"

"Yeah, it sure is," Danny concluded with a tired sigh while he sat back as the waitress interrupted the conversation by bringing their drinks and taking the food order while Eddie's fingers drummed a nervous but silent rhythm against the table on the other side of the wall as her head nearly exploded with stress, wondering if she'd heard enough since it seemed that Linda would have ample circumstantial evidence to be able to ID this woman on her own if necessary. Even though her blood was boiling, and she was questioning the efforts she made the past summer to help mend his marriage woes, the plan now was to make a silent retreat and confront Danny privately elsewhere to give him a chance to explain or come clean on his own to his wife under threat of having it done for him. Eddie had just made up her mind to make a break for the door before sliding to the edge of the seat when the next question stopped her in her tracks and made her heart shift instantly to ice.

"So you said on the phone something else had happened this morning… not to Jamie, I hope," Jackie asked with concern since she had always held a big-sister kind of affection for the youngest Reagan brother. "You don't think him getting so sick had anything to do with being targeted again, do you?"

 _Targeted... for what? Wait, did she say AGAIN?!_ Eddie started as she froze in place and a wave of shock rushed through her at this wholly unexpected change in direction. _How did this woman know Jamie and what the hell was she talking about?!_

"No, his wife took him out, and he got the flu from some snotty little kids that mobbed him at Kaylin's soccer practice," Danny reported as Eddie flinched in guilt over that whole unfortunate situation once more. "Nothing there, but whoever it is… they're screwing with us again. Remember Anna Zoltan?"

"The floater they dragged out of the East River with your card on her? That was what, seven, eight years ago? We caught the guy that broke her neck. He's doing life in Sing Sing last I heard. What does that have to do with anything?"

"Who was there when they pulled her out of the water, Jack? And who caught the case first?"

"Renzulli and Jamie… Sonny Malevsky," Jackie filled in the final blank as she contemplated the significance of that.

"Got the exact same call at four this morning," Danny reported while Eddie's mind was whirring and spinning while abruptly changing course once it recognized all of this previous talk of getting back together had not been between two former lovers, but rather an old partnership… how could she be so stupid to assume that in the first place or miss what had obviously been going on beneath her very nose all this time? _Some effing great detective skills there, Janko,_ she swore at herself, and whatever that meant it was being linked directly not to an accident, but rather a premeditated attack on her own husband… the knowledge of which had obviously been kept from both of them. "Floater with a broken neck… same MO down to my card in her pocket… M.E. ID'd her an hour ago and it's some real estate agent from Bay Ridge named Anna Zimmerman that I've never even met before. He killed another total stranger to get back at us."

"What the hell?" his former partner puzzled. "Another one? That makes two between her and that two-bit dealer, Joseph O'Connor, they dumped in the ally… poor guy must have got it because of his name, and whoever's doing this made sure you'd catch that case too. They're not just after Jamie and his family now… maybe since they can't get to him they're focused on playing games with you too, Danny, or maybe it's been the both of you all along to get to your dad," she concluded for him while piecing things together with growing concern he had been right all along. "You definitely need someone to watch your back. Does he know yet?"

"Dad? No, not about this part anyway," Danny informed her as he thoughtfully stirred the ice in his drink just as his phone lit up with a text from none other than the aforementioned Frank Reagan. "Speak of the devil," he noted before swiping and viewing the message. _10-64 Outside forthwith,_ it read and his son's eyes furrowed at that reference to radio silence along with that attached immediate summon. Trying not to let on to the fact that something was wrong, he took a covert look around the room eyeballing the other patrons but failing from his position to spot anyone acting suspiciously in the near empty back of the restaurant. Was his father trying to warn him they were under surveillance from whoever was behind this continued attack on them? What else could it be?

"Danny… what?" Jackie silently mouthed as she watched and sensed him tense before he immediately cut her off with a wave of his hand as he showed her the screen. He was just about to call for the check and tell the waitress to wrap their food to go when he heard it… an unmistakable personal musical ringtone from the other side of the wall that brought both memories back from his childhood… a song that his mom loved and would dance to with a tipsy husband while he and his siblings snuck down the stairs to watch… as well as instant recognition as to who's phone that was and who happened to be calling it in the present.

 _...You don't need a fortune-teller with a crystal ball to tell us in the autumn that the leaves are gonna fall. Or if the evening sun will slip into the sea. It's inevitable. Like you… uh.. and... uh... me!_

"EDDIE!" he gasped and stood up to duck around the side of the booth to confront her even before the device was silenced and Jamie's call to report to his wife that he had finally gained movement back in his foot was to be ignored for now. "YOU FOLLOWED ME?" Danny demanded as he caught her quickly getting to her feet. "The hell are you doing here?!" he added angrily, cursing himself for not being more careful, although this turn of events was wholly unexpected and in all honesty he had actually been paying a more paranoid attention than usual to watch for any tails as of late. His sister-in-law was better at this than he thought if she had managed to thwart him.

"ME!" came the return from behind a set of equally angry flashing blue Serbian eyes. "I'M here because Jamie's been worried about YOU!" she snapped back although she managed to keep her voice lowered to a hiss in public. "He said you've been acting off since he was hurt and he wanted me to help figure out what was going on because it looked like you were verging on some kind of PTSD breakdown, and first I thought it had to do with that or Linda, but now I find out THIS?" she spat leaving no doubt the family secret had been overheard and was out of the bag now. "And you KNEW? You all knew this whole time that someone had done this to him on purpose and you kept it from him? FROM ME? He's my HUSBAND and for all you know Kaylin and I have been in danger too! WAIT, THE STUPID CAR!" she railed as more of the pieces fell in place and her anger grew exponentially as the true threat to her family began to be peeled back. "Someone's been behind everything weird that's been happening to us?! You had NO RIGHT to keep that from us, Danny!"

"Eddie, c'mon, keep it down! We really can't talk about this here!" he started to try to rein her in as he shook his head and turned around to flip a few bills on the table behind him to cover the unwanted order while Jackie stood behind them and got her first up-close impression of Jamie's wife who certainly didn't look like a shrinking violet when it came to standing up to her former partner who could be scary in his own right when he was caught out like this.

"YOU'RE RIGHT! We're NOT going to do this here! We're driving up to Columbia NOW and you can explain all this to me and Jamie at the same time!" she huffed with indignation and turned heel to march across the floor to the front door and fling it open, determined that whatever was going on, they were going to get to the bottom of it together with that promised honesty pact still on her mind. Unfortunately, even before she stepped on the street and the entry bell stopped ringing overtop of her head, she realized there was one very tall obstacle standing in her way… one that happened to be dressed in a dark customary three-piece suit and a tan overcoat leaning up against a dark SUV.

"Frank?! What are _you_ doing here?"

###

"Did you talk to her yet?" Quincy asked softly from the doorway when he returned from Rigs' room an hour later, not wanting to intrude on a private conversation between his roommate and wife before wheeling himself inside when Jamie waved him on.

"Um… not yet; I tried, but she's not picking up," Jamie conveyed with evident disappointment at not being able to share with Eddie a wealth of news as his emotions were running the gamut bordering from ecstatic regarding his newfound leg function to crushing over the Commander's cancer diagnosis and outlook. "I did tell her to go home and put her feet up tonight instead of coming here, so hopefully she's just taking a nap or in the tub or something," he reported, not knowing of course that she was in some form of hot water, figuratively, with his own father at the moment.

"How'd things go with Rigs?"

"Better now I guess," Quincy acknowledged while he transferred himself up to the bed, although remaining on the opposite side with his back turned and head down. "We both said some things, and he tried to explain more of where his head was at when he decided not to tell me, but he's just so hard to read sometimes I don't know what to believe. He said he's gonna fight it, but if nothing else I think he just wants to see me walk again, and that's why he decided to take these treatments... to buy me some more time. I mean no pressure now, right?" he sighed sadly and considered the fact that even after this betrayal and the heartache he was feeling, he still owed Rigs an unpayable debt of gratitude. "As if I didn't have enough with Kenzie needing this to work. Six months or probably less…" he trailed off. "That's what he gave me to get it done."

"Yeah, I totally get that's going to be tough for you," Jamie sympathized with what at the current time seemed like an almost insurmountable task to both of them, and given the fact that his friend had evidently faced years of failure to this point it was almost unfair to ask more. "But I know you can do it, Quince, and I still don't think you should give up on him. He's tough. Are you gonna be okay?"

"He's not fooling me," Quincy continued to himself without really answering that question. "He knows there's no magic cure for him, and I know he's just saying that to focus me on something else so he doesn't have to think about the rest. He's alone too, all these years… signed up right out of high school and never gave a minute for a family of his own. So he's picked me and Kenzie to see him out… and maybe you too, Ice."

"No, he picked me to see _you_ out," Jamie corrected. "And like I told you I'm gonna do that no matter what happens to him or anyone else," he vowed. "We're a team now, okay? Tomorrow morning we'll be early to therapy and late to leave… a circus every day, I don't care how much it hurts… whatever it takes from here on out, no matter what else goes down," he added somewhat ominously and considered how fast things might change once Oliver Wendell's money stopped flowing into the study which would likely be as soon as the following week now in Agent Sisco's estimation. Somehow, even if Kenzie's study was tanked, he was going to have to find a way to get Quincy his needed therapy and prosthetic work, and fast—to be honest he was more worried about that now than his own needs. Some quick research when he was at home had shown that level of technology came with a hefty price tag—upwards of a hundred thousand dollars above the allowed military expenditure for the most highly sophisticated battery operated sensory system to allow an above-the-knee amputee easily to walk backwards, go upstairs, bike and step around obstacles on uneven ground, and Jamie was not about to settle on seeing his deserving friend in anything less at this point. _Maybe this was something he could turn Annabel loose on when the need came,_ he reasoned and thought of his enthusiastic former rookie who might now take a personal interest in this. _If anyone could figure out a way to organize a way to fund something like that and make it happen fast it would be her._

"So six months from today, mark your calendar," Jamie continued with a challenge, one that he had no idea would become nearly impossible and wholly one-sided after another setback threatened to steal life and limb from him again on a cold hillside in just over half that time. "That's where we're gonna be, alright? You and me are going somewhere to play some regular hoops, no chairs or crutches allowed, loser buys the beer, understand?"

"Yeah, okay... deal," Quincy accepted less than enthusiastically given the situation although he closed his eyes and willed himself to move forward with this concocted attempt to inject some positivity into the situation he found himself in. "It'll be like ops training all over again, right? I gotta do it, it's just… it still really feels like a bad dream, Ice… one that I really want to wake up from, you know?"

"I do," Jamie agreed, relieved that they had at least gotten that far. "So what's the next one?" he questioned as he tried to keep the tide headed in the right direction.

"The next what?" Quincy puzzled at this turn in the conversation as he finally broke from staring at the opposite wall and he glanced over.

"The next rule? We're upping the timetable so I gotta know. We were at what, seven or eight? What's after the sharks?" he prodded. "Anything the two of us can face together?"

"Oh, uh… yeah, eight… the ship attack mission, funny it is for a pair," Quincy remembered before explaining. "As Navy SEALs one of our main jobs is to conduct underwater attacks against enemy shipping. We practiced for this all the time during basic training. By the time it came for the test, we had an odd number of guys left when I got to that point since most of them decided to hang it up and not go back in the water again after Rigs got through with shark night," he chuckled for the first time all evening. "I almost did too after we drew straws and I got paired up with him for this. They dumped us off outside a harbor one night and we had to swim over two miles underwater using nothing but a depth gauge and compass to find the target. He stayed behind me the whole time just pushing me along because I was more scared of failing in front of him than anything else. The first part isn't so bad if you don't think about it too much because even though you're down there's still some light from the moon coming around you, but when you finally make it to the target… a ship tied up at the pier… all that fades away and you're left in nothin' but a black void. To finish the mission, you gotta swim underneath it and find the keel… the deepest part on the centerline. I mean you can't see your hand in front of your face and the noise from the engines running is enough to disorient you because your mind is thinking about those propellers and how they would make instant sushi out of you. It's one of the final tests and alotta guys fail under there when you're at the darkest part of the mission 'cause it's the time when you have be calm and composed… when your tactical skills, your physical power and all your inner strength has to come into play..." he mused and trailed off as the parallels with his current situation were obvious. "Only reason I made it was because I knew Rigs was there watching me and I couldn't disappoint him… that's the next rule… number eight, to be your very best in the darkest moment."

"Kinda like now," Jamie encouraged. "But this time we're both down there with him behind us. That's how you've gotta think of this, and you're gonna be at your best, Quince. Six months," he reiterated. "Six months and all of this is gonna be different for both of us, I promise."

 **SEAL Rule #8: If you want to change the world, you must be your very best in the darkest moment.**

* * *

 _Ah… six months, and where will our two heros be then? In the next installment of this series called "Where the Heart Lies" I hope lol. Still a bit more to get through in this story though. One more scene to follow in this timeframe as Eddie faces off with the family and provides the key to Mason Malevsky's identity before we permanently jump ahead to Jamie now facing a different kind of danger at the bottom of that hill as he continues to fight to make it out of there alive while filling in the blanks on the action that had occurred from this point forward._


	91. Chapter 91

Chapter 91

"So, Edit, are we going to be civil now and talk about this, or what?"

"Now? You _really_ want me to be all nice and talk... after hearing about all this? After almost a month of not knowing my husband or child was in danger from some maniac? I think maybe it would be better if I go with ' _or what'_ right now, don't you _?"_ Eddie answered her father-in-law insolently under determined protest with crossed arms as she was escorted into the dining room at the family home in Bay Ridge along with Danny and Jackie. The ride back in the SUV had been tense between them with just the basics of the situation shared to bring her up to speed for this meeting, and all but Frank took a seat at the table before a forewarned Henry joined them from the kitchen with a full bottle of scotch and tumblers in hand along with some steeping soothing decaf herbal tea for his tense granddaughter-in-law.

"Then you will continue to _listen,"_ Frank replied gruffly as he rocked back on his heels with a deep breath and began his customary pacing between the head of the table and the window while he tried to come to terms with the growing ire he held now that this whole matter was blowing up within the family and control had been taken out of his hands. He knew from the moment Eddie's assigned detail reported that she had left the precinct and had tailed Danny to the restaurant that the jig was up, but after hearing his oldest son's admission over speaker on the way over that there had been another development with the staged death of Anna Zimmerman that morning there was no doubt in anyone's mind that the threat against all of them was still there and growing in magnitude. Surely whoever was behind this was continuing to escalate and had to have some kind of endgame approaching.

"First of all as your _boss,"_ he continued with emphasis in a deep, disapproving, authoritative Commissioner tone. "I can tell you that I will not tolerate any of my officers going out alone rogue on an investigation whether they are related to me or not, especially a _pregnant_ someone who has not earned a detective badge yet and has been assigned to modified duty at a _desk_ for the expressed reason there are _complications_ with her condition," he lectured sternly. "You're lucky this isn't official or there would be a very big black mark on your record followed by at least a three day RIP, young lady!"

"INVESTIGATION?! That's rich! How the hell was I supposed to go rogue if I didn't know there was an investigation in the first place since none of you ever thought to share _any_ of that with me or Jamie?" Eddie couldn't help but defend herself as if she were speaking to her own father in this light.

"Then what were you doing following me?" Danny jumped into the conversation with suspicion now, hung up on that point and taking professional offense to the fact he had been found out so easily… something his father was not ready to ignore either.

"And there's _that,"_ Frank continued to berate on his tirade as if he hadn't been interrupted. "One of the top detectives in the department… my own _son_ who should know better... is so distracted he fails to be aware of his surroundings or follow protocol and therefore divulged sensitive information on a case like this in public! That's grounds for a hefty suspension too! You're both damn lucky this investigation is in-house… IN THIS HOUSE!" he thundered a little louder to make his point clearly. "Does anyone here think whoever this is will be _that_ careless the next time he comes after one of us?"

"The next time?" Eddie refocused as she began to get a sense of the scope of this. "You think they'll do it again?" her heart fluttered with unease once more over being separated from her husband given the fact he had been hurt so badly in the first place. "There's enough of a threat that you put a detail on me? And you don't think I had a right to be ready to defend myself or Jamie or Kaylin? My mom is alone with her at the house right now!" she panicked at the thought of Eva Janko with such a responsibility even if it was only a few blocks away.

"There's eyes on them too, 24/7," Frank assured as he backed down a little now that he could see the fear starting to grow and replace the anger in his daughter-in-law. "They're safe, as is Jamie at Columbia… I made sure of it."

"Then if you really didn't know what was going on, why come after me?" Danny continued to fish for an answer to the same question. "You were spying on me and Jackie!"

"Because like _I_ told _you,_ Jamie thought you've been acting off lately and asked me to find out why… he was really worried after the way you were the other day when you came to see him in the rehab room," Eddie offered an accusation and in a typical sibling rift tactic tried to shift Frank's focus to her brother-in-law's role in all this. "He said you flipped out when you saw him lying on the ground and Quincy thinks you have PTSD," she added and then paused when that revelation had the desired effect of turning all sets of shocked eyes back towards Danny, although little did they know an even bigger bombshell was coming.

"Oh for God's sake, is he still on that kick?" Danny bluffed loudly with evident disdain at that insinuation although he did not fail to notice that he had not managed to divert anyone else's gaze without an explanation and gave silent thanks that Linda was not there to confirm that suspicion as he remained in clear denial. "That's ridiculous," he countered, feeling his chest tighten with anxiety as knowing looks were crossing the table between his father, Henry and Jackie. "Damn kid was flat on the ground with people around him yelling at him to breathe, so yeah, after all we've been through with him, I freaked a little! What the hell was I supposed to think?" he demanded before serving a question right back to deflect attention to Eddie and her lone wolf behavior. "That still doesn't explain why you tailed me!"

"I thought maybe it was something else at first!" she answered back defiantly although without using the words that insinuated an affair, at least not right away. "When you came to the precinct to see Marcus... you acted all weird and kinda guilty when you got that phone call afterwards, so I decided to see who you were meeting," she added. "I guess I was shocked when I saw you walk inside looking all friendly and holding hands with _her,"_ she nodded at Jackie sheepishly. "So I assumed…"

"SERIOUSLY?" Danny gawked back even as a deep red tinged his cheeks since despite his innocence whether he wanted to admit it or not there had always been a certain level of attraction to his former partner even if it had never been acted upon. "You really thought what? That I was having some kind of affair? How could you?! For your information, she's engaged to be married! And I wasn't holding her hand! I was helping because she twisted her ankle wearing those crazy heels and I didn't want her to fall down again!"

"I DIDN'T KNOW THAT!" Eddie insisted. "I only know what I SAW, so I followed you inside to find out for sure… I mean you didn't even bother to stop and talk to Linda about adopting the baby first and I owed it to her to try to figure out what was going on since I didn't realize Jackie was your old partner, and for the record, I didn't exactly tail you… I just heard you mention where you were going and drove there!"

"WHOA! A BABY? Going off on your brother at Columbia? Flirting with your old partner while you're working a case? Now just hold on for ONE DOGGONE SECOND right there, DANIEL REAGAN!" Henry latched on as all those tidbits had certainly come out of the blue and he could no longer sit idly by as he entered the fray while leaning forward with determination to at least iron out a few of the wrinkles in what had obviously become a very messy family bed. "WHAT IN THE HOLY HELL IS GOING ON WITH YOU LATELY? And what BABY are we talking about adopting now?! Francis, did you know about this?" he added as one look at his son's face told him the answer to that last question was an emphatic negative.

"No I did not," Frank sighed and finally succumbed to gravity now as he sat down, suddenly feeling overwhelmed with these new developments even though they potentially clarified why his oldest son had indeed appeared to be so distracted lately. "Care to explain any of this?" he asked to put him on the spot. "It's time to put everything on the table," he added after throwing the folder he had retrieved from his home office down as a demonstration. "We all need to come clean."

"Well first of all I was _not_ flirting with my partner... let's get that straight right away and you're so _not_ the one to bring that up, Janko, considering!" Danny fired back at Eddie and referenced her first years with Jamie on the job. "Second, Linda and I… she…" he hesitated as his voice softened and he revealed the painful truth while dropping his eyes to avoid the shocked look on his patriarch's faces. "She was pregnant, but had a miscarriage a few weeks ago."

"She's… was what?" Henry nearly choked as that caught him completely off guard.

"Preg… hold on, come again?" Frank stuttered uncharacteristically as he was likewise derailed from his train of thought. After having been informed earlier that there would be no more grandchildren from that branch of the Reagan tree this was the furthest thing from his mind and was enough to throw him backwards given the same sadness he and Mary had faced on more than one occasion. "Danny, why didn't you tell us this before? I'm so sorry. I thought you said she couldn't because of her back."

"It's true, but it happened before we knew about that, and then she lost it right after," he explained carefully with a clenched jaw as he considered the strain his wife had been through largely on her own. "She didn't want to talk about it until she was ready. It was really early on, and not anything that could have been helped, so that's why she's been down lately, but..."

"But now?" Henry pried as he thought he heard a note of optimism even with the delivery of that terrible news and a single whiff of another grandchild coming into the picture had him focused solely on that for the moment even with the rest of the night's events to contend with.

"Now... we're looking into maybe something else, you know like Eddie and Jamie did with Kaylin… but nothing's set yet though, so don't get your hopes up too high," he warned as his grandfather's eyes lit up, anyway. "There's just someone we know who might want to do an open adoption in June when the baby's born."

"And Marcus Beale is the father," Frank deduced with a frown given the young man's somewhat tarnished history.

"Yes, sir," Danny acknowledged while leaving out the rest with the particulars about the mother especially given her intention to attend the academy. "And from now on I promise I'll keep you all in the loop if we do decide to go through with it, but that's down the road and right now I think we have something more important to talk about, don't we? Like how we're going to catch this son of a bitch before he kills someone else in this stupid game he's playing."

"Right," his father accepted the turn in the conversation, satisfied that they had covered a large part of whatever had been behind his oldest son's stress as of late, although the mention of PTSD had certainly caught his attention and would be dissected more thoroughly in a private discussion to follow. "On that note," he added as he switched gears and pulled that previously discarded folder closer to him. "Since this appears to be personal, I took the liberty of looking through every single person attached to the Blue Templar case the first time. They're all still doing time upstate, with the exception of the two that are dead… Sonny Malevsky and Alex Bello… both suicides," he explained as he turned to Eddie. "Malevsky the night of the arrests and Bello hung himself in his cell six months later after the jury found him guilty on all counts," he pointed out the top two on the first page before keeping that one for himself and pushing the remaining sheets of file photos at her. "Jackie has started following up on this independent of the department and is looking at family members of those still incarcerated in case one of them is using someone on the outside to do this."

"Damon Camia was my first guess," Jackie informed as she took over. "He was a detective out of the 2-7 and worked in Warrants with Joe. The night the Templar went down he sent his wife out of the country on a Jet Blue flight and then caught my tail and ran me off the road. He's been in contact with her, but she's still in Armenia with their kids and what's left of a couple suitcases full of cash… with no extradition treaty, I doubt she even gives him a second thought," she explained and Eddie focused with new interest on Danny's former partner and her self-confident, thorough manner. Jackie was the epitome of the type of detective she wanted to be. Having watched her brother-in-law work for several years in a more dominant role with Maria Baez, she sensed that there had been a different dynamic between these two as he allowed her to take the lead without question while she continued to review her findings and checked several more possibilities off the list. "And the last one I looked at was the widow Angela Bello with their two teenage daughters," Curtola was finishing. "Still living in Florida and remarried… nothing there."

"And nothing on the car either," Danny added. "I've contacted all the outlets I could find that sell authentic Chevelle parts, but so far there haven't been any suspicious sales linking back to this area or DC. I think that's a lost cause though… ship it from A to B then to C and there's no way to follow a paper trail."

"What about the woman that was killed this morning," Henry reminded. "I think you should focus on her… it's a fresher lead."

"No one here has a connection to this Anna Zimmerman, at least as far as I could tell," Danny reminded them of the latest victim. "She's an agent out of a realtor's office on Shore Road… Bayside Realty. They have listings all over Brooklyn… those light blue for sale signs with the sun on them. Wait, this has nothing to do with Eva, right? I know she's working out of Park Slope now, but it's still the same industry..." he mused and focused back on Eddie whose attention had abruptly shifted back to the first sheet with the two photos Frank had retained as something snapped over in her brain… a familiarity to a man who had recently made her blood run cold, and then disappeared as suddenly as he had arrived leaving behind an empty little Cape Cod house with a light blue sales sign in the yard.

"Wait! Who is this again?" she demanded urgently and pointed to the first picture of a smirking dark-haired detective from his blown up departmental badge ID photo.

"Sonny Malevsky," Frank replied coldly, puzzled at her interest at first. "He's the bastard that shot Joe and also worked Warrants, but I told you he's dead from a suicide."

"May he rot in hell," Henry added crassly with a deliberate sip of his scotch.

"But he's the one that went after Jamie back then, right?" Eddie was somewhat frantically trying to pull things out of the mess on information she had been asked to digest in the last hour and reconcile those facts with something now twisting in her gut. "You said you thought the car was important because that was what he was remembering all along and this was the man that cut the brake lines on the Chevelle, right?"

"Yeah, I think that's part of what really drew his attention to the kid in the first place, besides being the Commissioner's son… Sonny was into muscle cars, had a sweet new Dodge Challenger coupe with a V8 Hemi engine that cost half my year's salary," Danny confirmed as he remembered back to that time he had nearly compromised the mission when planting a tracking device on it. "'Go big or go home,' that's what he told me. I tagged it with a GPS so we could follow him, but he donated it to the church for a raffle trying to throw us off track the night the Templar went down. He's also the one that caught the Anna Zoltan case… the first floater," he explained to her. "I just can't figure out why his name keeps popping up in all this."

"B-because h-he's the one... behind it," Eddie stuttered and looked up in shock, visibly paling and starting to shake as the resemblance between Sonny and his father Mason became clearer in her mind with the thought that this man had been so close to them—living and watching them from across the street all this time and had in fact been inside their house with Kaylin and Bear—not to mention that she had been the one to investigate and clear him of anything suspicious before all of this happened when Jamie's intuition had clearly been telling them something else, and had been right from that first encounter on the sidewalk in front of that house.

" _Not mister, just Mason," he had grinned back like a cold, dead fish and Jamie had felt a shiver of that uncanny sense of recognition sweep over him once more. "Just retired up here from down south and not quite used to this weather. Be safe out there," the older man advised as he had looked pointedly at her husband and pushed his hat down a little and zipped up his plaid flannel coat. "I saw you run by earlier," he explained. "Traffic in this city is something to behold. I don't know how you joggers do it... always gotta be watchin' for cars when you cross the street. Nobody stops for a person anymore," he lamented. "You all have a good day," he added before turning back to his work and the trio continued on their little excursion after his slightly abrupt dismissal._

"OH, MY GOD! I'M SO STUPID! This is all my fault!" she gasped back into the present. "Why did I try to play detective and handle this? I should have seen it before! He knew Jamie was leaving for Washington, but I checked it out and told him not to worry… that he was just a harmless old grumpy man! All I did was basically look on his social media and make sure he filed some tax returns! He must have FAKED IT! What was I thinking?!"

"Eddie, sweetheart, I can assure you that Sonny Malevsky is dead and no longer a threat," Frank looked on as he tried to follow along with concern growing for her welfare which in all honestly reflected the look of someone who had just seen a ghost. "He pointed a Glock up through his chin and shot himself in front of all of us that night."

"NO! NOT HIM! Not exactly him anyway, and it's NOT MALEVSKY… it's LOCKWOOD, at least that's what he said!" Eddie cried as she tried to make them understand. "THIS!" she pointed at Sonny's trademarked sideways grin which was ever-present, even in photos where it was inappropriate. "It's the same smile as that older man in the little house down the street from us! I looked up the real estate deed, and it said MASON LOCKWOOD! Jamie had a bad feeling about him, but everything I found said he was just a retired accountant. He said he moved up here from the south to be closer to his son. Now he's gone and Anna Zimmerman was his realtor! Her picture is on the for-sale sign in the front yard! That can't be a coincidence, right? I saw it last week with my mom! He was in our house before the trip and Bear HATED him! He was staring at our security system and knew what kind of cat we had!" she continued as the pieces fell into place, albeit in no apparent discernable order that anyone else in the room could easily follow at first. "He's the one that told Jamie he's always 'gotta be watchin' for cars' when you cross the street! Danny! C'mon, remember?! You asked me if I wanted you to check him out! I should have said YES because I screwed up! He was watching us that night when we left for Washington, and I told you how much he creeped me out!"

" _That_ guy?" Danny jumped to his feet in frustration and waved his hands in the direction of Jamie and Eddie's home. "But he was there when we were leaving! He couldn't have been in Washington too! Who the hell is this Lockwood, and why is he after us?"

"Malevsky," Frank corrected grimly as the final piece fell in place and his eidetic memory pulled something from the past while he shuffled through the remaining papers in his pile before pulling out his laptop and searching through departmental personnel records. "Here… I remember now from Sonny's obituary… his father's name was Mason… Mason _Malevsky_ from… Quantico," he revealed as his eyes lifted above the screen with that obvious implication.

"VIRGINIA?" Danny thundered, wondering how on earth this obvious link had been overlooked for all this time. "As in…?"

"A former member of the FBI's Behavioral Analysis Unit," his father finished that thought for him as he continued reading. "Terminated without cause after Sonny's involvement in the Templar was made public. That's why he's doing this, the SON OF A BITCH!" he slammed the lid on the computer down hard enough to crack the screen… this man who had nearly taken his youngest's life had inserted himself under their noses and directly into their business all this time. "We were so damn focused on this being someone from the NYPD still on the inside pulling the strings to get back at us, it never occurred to me to look there! We outed Sonny's younger brother Matthew from his detective post at the 3-1 for the same reason… we thought he was most likely corrupted too. I considered him at one point but he was never top drawer. I knew he didn't have it in him to pull something like this off."

"So Mason's the manipulative mastermind and there's our willing accomplice," Danny presumed as he sat down in exhaustion, all of his emotions tapped out. "It fits. We thought there had to be two… one here to plant the cat here that day, and one in Washington…"

"To hurt Jamie," Eddie rejoined the conversation in a sad voice, her heart still weighted heavily with guilt for her own responsibility in this situation. "He was right there all this time, it was Mason, I know it! If we wait any longer, it might be too late! He's still out there!"

"Then we need to work together to find him, and fast," Frank concluded grimly. "Nothing else matters, and we won't stop until we do."

* * *

 _March 14, 3:50 am_

" _Sir, we don't have time to argue with him! If we're right and that's not Jamie's body next to the car, then it doesn't matter because he's gotta be hurt and somewhere up on that ridge!" Rick rejoined the contentious conversation with the three other men still standing in a small group and an urgency in his voice, his heart still weighted heavily with guilt for his own responsibility in this situation after having paced around the clearing looking for any sign of his friend and calling out for several minutes with no answer forthcoming from the now silent, frozen and nearly impassable underbrush. "It's the only place around here there would be cell reception, right? But it's been hours since he made that call and he hasn't come down, so if he had a signal why didn't he make another one to tell you where he was? I'm not sure how the hell he would have even managed to get up there, but Eddie was right all this time, he's still alive!" he reiterated. "In this weather if we wait any longer for that jackass to call in a search team, it might be too late!"_

" _Then we need to work together to find him, and fast," Frank concluded grimly as he stared up at the foreboding, dark hillside and his heart broke at all the pain and frustration his youngest son had endured over the last three months only to have it come down to this… what appeared to be a calculated decision to risk everything including his very life and limb to save his brother. "Nothing else matters, and we won't stop until we do!"_

* * *

 _There we go, enough in the past, and a little snippet of what's happening in the present. Time now permanently to make the jump up to that hillside in the dark where we can work this out in the present day and hear the rest of the story._

 _To my FF friends who are being impacted by the wildfires in CA, please stay safe! So scary seeing those images coming out of there and my heart breaks for all the people and animals being effected._


	92. Chapter 92

Chapter 92

A short recap from chapter 80 as a reminder of where Jamie is at in all this just to get our ducks in a row while the timelines finally coincide:

* * *

 _March 14, 3:45 am_

 _Years later, a more practical-minded Jamison Reagan paused to weigh his narrow list of options for slightly longer than that as he considered a desperate attempt at his own slide for life to change his apparent fate while he teetered there at the base of that gnarled up tree that had at first prevented an uncontrolled descent down the slippery hill into the angry river below. Somehow he had to get himself out of this brush and into the open where he could be more easily found or resign himself to the fact that he would lay here frozen to death under a pile of leaves in this hellhole while help was literally only yards away. If he couldn't go up, the only other possibility was down where gravity would at least cease to be a determined foe. It was now or never Jamie finally concluded as he was sure he had chunked off his last possible hour alone and very soon the blessed darkness and another waiting brother would welcome him home for the rest of eternity._

" _I'm not gonna let myself give up without trying! I love you, Ed!" he rasped before deciding to end his struggle one way or another as he used all of his remaining strength to push himself sideways around the confining, washed out roots that had held him in this little nested place on the hillside, giving the rest up to God and the pull of the earth as his body plummeted downwards over the rough ground once more with a prayer that something else might stop his unrestrained descent before another heavy hit against a solid object or a splash into the icy current raging below claimed him forever._

* * *

"How far out now, Jimmy?" Frank demanded with a sharp edge to his voice from the backseat he shared with an equally anxious Rick Fellows as they willed the black SUV to approach the scene even faster, lights and sirens wailing with those sounds tinkling over the nearby ridge and offering hope to waiting ears. Detective Nucifero's palms were left sweating from stress on the wheel as he guided the large car as fast as he responsibly dared considering his important cargo on the slippery, winding roads nearing the reported location of the single car accident that had left one of the Commissioner's remaining sons in critical condition just out of surgery in the trauma unit at New York Presbyterian and the other, purportedly the lifeless body of his youngest, charred beyond recognition and under a single guard awaiting the arrival of a slow-moving rural county coroner to declare him dead while covered by a yellow tarp next to the burnt out shell of a familiar green Jeep that had slipped on the steep downward decline before striking a tree and rupturing a gas line.

"Should be just over the rise, this side of the river according to the GPS," Nucifero reported as the backend of the vehicle fishtailed dangerously on a patch of black ice. "I'm sorry, sir, but I have to take it easy here or we're going to end up the same way," he gritted as he fought to regain control and immediately throttled down, pumping the brakes as they crested the hill and spotted the grim scene below, lit up from a few meager spotlights set around the perimeter with the sharp, lingering taste of acrid smoke in the air immediately apparent.

"Jesus," Rick mouthed as he spotted the large charred ring that encircled the remnants of Danny's longtime iconic car resting up against the trunk of a still-smoldering pine at the base of a single lane bridge that crossed a torrent of water, swollen by recent heavy rains upstate. "Damn thing looks like it went up like a roman candle," he observed with a puzzled note as his FDNY experience came to the forefront. "All those recalls for gas tank ruptures the last few years were from Jeeps being rear-ended, that sort of burn usually happens when they're hit from behind, but he might have run over a rock or something once he was off the road since the tanks hang low," he reasoned. "Danny was lucky to have made it out in time, considering."

"And the fact that his brother did not will kill him, anyway. How can I tell him that when he wakes up?" Frank teared up as he feared the worst and whispered with heartache as his eyes had instead tried to focus and lock on the small bit of yellow just visible to the front of the Jeep while Nucifero guided the SUV to a safe stop at a small distance away. "It can't be him… Rick, it can't be Jamie down there, or I'm going to lose both my boys tonight… and Eddie too, look what it's done to her already," he closed his eyes and thought about his daughter-in-law who had taken ill immediately upon hearing the news and was being monitored on the high risk OB unit on strict bedrest in the same hospital as Danny, her already compromised pregnancy now in obvious danger with this level of added stress at just 26 weeks along, their cherished bean only the size of an eggplant and weighing in at less than two pounds, far too young and tiny to arrive safely. "She's so sure Jamie is still alive because Danny had the wrong phone, but it could have been mixed up on the ground in the wreck and this waiting and not knowing… if I can't go back there and say that she's right I'm scared she's going to lose their baby tonight too, and that little one is all we'll have left of him," he added with fear of that distinct possibility fully evident.

"Single car accident, they were on their way home from the airport together so I'm not sure why they were up here or how it can be anyone else, but we'll go find out for sure," Rick determined just as the long-awaited coroner's vehicle slid to a stop alongside them, hours late to the scene. "Looks like they finally found the bastard and sobered him up... must have made last call," he remarked with disdain over this useless need for a death declaration given the delay so far in the necessary formality since the rural police chief in this area, and most notably the brother-in-law of the previously absent medical examiner, had balked at relinquishing control over the situation to the State Police or his city neighbor's to the east even given the fact that it was the NYPD Police Commissioner's family involved.

"Stay here, sir," Rick continued and offered kindly to spare a grieving father the sight of what was below. "I'll go… it's the least I can do considering how he went to bat for Kenzie down in Washington yesterday," he added sadly with his own culpability over what had become a contentious relationship between the two once Jamie's role in taking down Oliver Wendell and the effect that had on the doctor's entire study had come to light. "Please, sir… after sitting through those hearings I know he did what he had to, and I wasn't a very good friend to him these past few months, but I can do this for you and your family," the now-retired rescue man and Marine insisted in a pained fashion as he tried and failed to hold his emotions back. "I've seen this before… you shouldn't have to remember him this way."

"He's my son, how can I not go?" Frank croaked hoarsely, even as it took all his effort to move his deadened legs through the door as Detective Nucifero exited the driver's seat to open it for him before taking a firm hold of his boss's arm, hesitant to let him walk on wobbly knees on the slick ground. The Reagan family could ill-afford another tragedy like a broken hip from another member on a night like this which had already seen one dead and two hospitalized. "Let's get this over with… Jamie hates…" he swallowed hard while catching himself referring to his son in the present. "You know he wouldn't want to be laying out in the cold like that," he finished with staggering irony at the precise second his very much loved and still living youngest had determined to take fate in his own hands and push himself over the edge of the ridge to plummet down the hillside in a desperate attempt to be found.

"Yes, sir," Rick conceded as the three of them carefully made their way across the slick ground and in front of the solitary deputy who had been assigned to remain on watch overnight and paused to salute out of respect for his fellow high-ranking law enforcement brethren as they slowly passed by.

"Oh, dear God in Heaven," Frank murmured in prayer with a halting stagger in his step as they rounded the side of the Jeep's remains and his detective brain searched for anything that might suggest that Eddie's faith was on target and the pitiful lump under the familiar tarp was anything but who they feared it to be, but the twisted metal of the still-needed crutches in the backseat all but confirmed who the passenger had been, and the smell of burned rubber and flesh was enough to turn all of their stomachs as they waited for the slow-moving, heavy-set coroner and his assistant to join them.

"About time you decided this was important enough to show up!" Rick fumed as his grief turned to a more focused anger on the two older men approaching. "I don't know how you do things out here in Podunk County, but this is a cop! Someone's son, husband, brother… my friend!" he exploded. "That counts for something where we come from! You left him lying out here for hours!"

"Eh, zip it. I ain't no twenty-four-hour government-fed whore with ten people under 'im, and I don't jump when I'm off duty just 'cause some bigshot says so," Ralph Barton gritted back as he spat on the ground to the side. "Dead is dead unless you think me comin' out here to declare in the middle of the night wit' weather rollin' in ain't gonna make him less so," he admonished with hard to follow double negatives and no trace of sympathy.

"Must be nice to play God and collect your check!" Rick continued to bash as he looked for a suitable outlet to take out his anger and frustration. "Hardly any training, always know someone to get the job, but guys like you love to take charge here and screw whoever you want, right? You get paid for years for doing nothing. Who's the whore?"

"You want this job? You can have it!" Barton bit back. "Called out all hours to look at somethin' like this! Nothin' gonna bring 'im back, is there? Lift it and let's get outta here before that ice they're calling for hits and we wind up wrapped around a tree trying to get home too just like this bastard," he directed his assistant to pull back the tarp and despite his previous resolve Frank turned his back immediately and stumbled away a few steps before he could see the charred body underneath while the unmoved coroner stood in place and signed the top form on his clipboard with barely a glance at the nearly unidentifiable burned corpse curled up in a fetal position lying on its right side. "Caucasian male, probably five-seven or -eight, one-sixty give or take," the man grunted out what little could be determined. "Good enough. Accident team will be out to collect 'im come morning once the roads clear up. I ain't sending anyone else out before that. He'll be at the county morgue. Daryl will stay here 'til then," he nodded at his nephew, the rookie deputy who was likewise staring off elsewhere with no desire to see up close what had ultimately become of the victim.

"Rick," Frank begged as he could not bring himself to turn around and see his youngest boy in that state. "Is it…? Can you tell?"

"No, sir, I… um," Fellows swallowed as despite his many years of military service and time in the FDNY he was having trouble thinking clearly and distancing himself enough from the familiar finding after a fatal fire or accident… one he had found himself at any number of times. "It's bad… I mean there's barely anything... I don't think we'll be able to tell until the autopsy, unless…" he recalled a very obvious clue which would immediately expose with little doubt if this was indeed Jamison Reagan or not. "Unless we roll him over and look at his right leg. He has nails and screws in the tibia and femur from a recent break," he explained to the unimpressed coroner. "They'd still be there."

"Not gonna happen until he's on my slab," the man balked. "There's evidence to be bagged! Standin' here and lookin' is one thing, but now you're talkin' about interferin' with a possible crime scene! There's no reason to think this is anyone else, and the driver here's facing vehicular manslaughter charges, ain't he? The other son? You got dental records or X-rays? Send them to my office," he ordered. "No one's touching the body now until everything gets documented, and if you try I'll have you both arrested for tamperin' wit' it!"

"Then we'll walk out of here in handcuffs!" Frank countered angrily as he finally turned around to face them, his glassy eyes lighting on the pitiful form before him. "You pick him up and check that leg, or I'll do it myself!" he nearly choked out at the thought as in spite of the forced bravado he could in no way fathom laying his hands on that body. "If you want, we'll get the Governor on the phone right now! I've got him on speed dial, do you?! He has the authority to remove you from office, right? And I have the juice with him to get that done!" he bluffed given his already disputable relationship with the head of their state who likely would have rejected his call outright. "Don't think I won't play that card!" he continued, anyway. "If that's not my son, I need to know it now!"

"I'd like to see you try!" Barton countered. "I'll have Daryl confine 'ya right here! Damn city slickers think everything's gotta go their way. Besides, there' ain't no cell reception down in this hollow!" he advised with a huff.

"It's true, I patrol through here all the time," Deputy Daryl Watson finally spoke up as he tried to step in and diffuse the situation since he had no appetite to be known as the Podunk officer charged and skewered in the press with detaining the NYPD Police Commissioner at the scene of his own son's death. "It's so low here my radio has brownouts too," he advised. "Can't get reception anywhere but past the top of that hill over there," he pointed upwards. "A couple hundred yards as the crow flies but over a mile and a half by road since it circles around."

"He's right, sir," Detective Nucifero confirmed as he pointed to the screen of his own phone after trying his best thus far not to get in Frank's way, however it was his charge to make sure the Commissioner was safe, and certainly keeping the city's top cop out of some two-bit jail overnight qualified as a reason to intervene. "No bars and the radio in the car is offline too."

"WHAT DID YOU SAY?!" Frank demanded as despite the stress of the situation, something had finally clicked over in his brain… a very key point that had offered a sliver of hope in this case that his daughter-in-law had been on target with her assertions all this time. If there was no service in this area, then it would have been impossible for his gravely injured older son to have made that 911 plea himself… the grainy, almost illegible and hard to decipher one that had come from Daniel Regan's phone and begged for someone to come to this bridge and save his brother who was hurt badly near a burning car. "If Danny didn't make that call…" his heart surged.

"I'LL BE DAMNED!" Rick thundered as he caught on and turned back to go search the perimeter on the other side of the car for any sign of where his friend had gone. "He _is_ out there!"

"EDDIE WAS RIGHT!" Frank continued, almost to himself. "So then this can't be… Jamie," he paused and looked down at the body with renewed interest now and no sense of the same horror before his eyes closed to give a shaky prayer that they hadn't come to that conclusion too late. "Praise God, thank you! IT'S NOT HIM! She was RIGHT! But he's been out there alone somewhere all this time! DAMN IT!" he cursed and looked out at the quiet woods now slowly being shrouded in ice as the dangerous freezing rain that had been forecasted started to descend. "JAMIE! JAMIE, HOLD ON, SON! WE'RE COMING!" he bellowed in a loud, deep, far-reaching voice that echoed through the ravine before turning back with a demanding look to the other officials. "We need a search team here NOW!"

"What have you two been smoking?" Barton scoffed back in disgust as he looked at both of them as if they had sprouted two heads apiece before skittering sideways trying to turn on the increasingly slippery ground. "Here he is, dead… all signed, just like you wanted," he while waving at the ground and his clipboard. "And I told ya the effing weather was comin', now look!" he ordered pointing to the pinging, freezing rain that had started and was quickly turning the ground treacherous. "None of us are gettin' up that hill and outta here even with four-wheel drive until the sun comes up and a salter can open up these roads! I'm gonna be billing the great NYPD for all the damn overtime this is gonna cost me sittin' in my van!" he added as he headed for his vehicle with his assistant to do just that, leaving Frank and Nucifero momentarily alone with the young deputy.

"Sir, we don't have time to argue with him! If we're right and that's not Jamie's body next to the car, then it doesn't matter because he's gotta be hurt and somewhere up on that ridge!" Rick rejoined the contentious conversation with the three other men still standing in a small group and an urgency in his voice, his heart still weighted heavily with guilt for his own responsibility in this situation after having paced around the clearing looking for any sign of his friend and calling out for several minutes with no answer forthcoming from the now silent, frozen and nearly impassable underbrush. "It's the only place around here there would be cell reception, right? But it's been hours since he made that call and he hasn't come down, so if he had a signal why didn't he make another one to tell you where he was? I'm not sure how the hell he would have even managed to get up there, but Eddie was right all this time, he's still alive!" he reiterated. "In this weather if we wait any longer for that jackass to call in a search team, it might be too late!"

"Then we need to work together to find him, and fast," Frank concluded grimly as he stared up at the foreboding, dark hillside and his heart broke at all the pain and frustration his youngest son had endured over the last three months only to have it come down to this… what appeared to be a calculated decision to risk everything including his very life and limb to save his brother. "Nothing else matters, and we won't stop until we do!"

While Frank and Rick were just over a hundred yards away frantically scrambling to start a search in the dark with their own limited resources given the realization that there was no time to spare before the cavalry could arrive, Jamie's tumultuous, desperate descent down the steep hillside in an effort to make himself more visible had come to a sudden, whiplashing painful halt flat on his back in a ditch along a narrow walking path mere feet away from the roiling, cold water of the rushing river which would have marked a certain and very swift end. Honestly afraid of what he might find when he opened them, he kept his eyes closed for a brief moment while self-assessing whatever damage might have been added to his body's tally by the decision to launch himself from his previous little nest high on the ridge with blind faith. Surprisingly, other than his right leg and hip which had essentially become blessedly numb over the past hours as the result of whatever injury had occurred from the first slip and fall, there was nothing new screaming back sharply at him, so it was a very large jolt to his senses when he finally peered up as his vision cleared only to reveal exactly what had stopped his downward momentum—a soft, inconsistent beam of moonlight highlighting the top edges of a two inch gnarly branch that had transected his chest and impaled him from the left to the right and was now sticking out of his coat just above his right shoulder.

"SHIT!" Jamie gasped silently in shock as he looked at the gruesome outline, taking in a deep breath as his hand came up to his heart, expecting at first to feel his life's blood seeping from some kind of mortal wound while he prepared to meet his maker. Instead, his mind slowly began to come to grips with the fact that he was indeed still breathing without too much effort as his probing fingers revealed the boundaries of the wood sitting just above his ribs and that it had likely done nothing more than offer a few superficial scratches after piercing that insanely expensive primaloft coat of his from one side to the other to serve as a cushioning brake that halted his fall and spared him from further catastrophic injury or worse as it left him awkwardly skewered against the base of a large, lobe-leaved mountain laurel bush.

"Oh sweet Jesus, Mary and Joseph… c'mon this isn't funny anymore, guys," he rasped in a familiar way as he spoke to those above and his head collapsed back wearily on the ground while he shakily contemplated how close… within an inch in all likelihood, really… he had come to fate once more. "Ed's gonna kill me when she sees what I did to this jacket," he sputtered and then couldn't help but let out a small giggle of relief at the notion his wife would give a rat's ass about its tattered and bloodied condition after all this. Perhaps he was starting to lose it, he decided before reaching up to unzip the lifesaving garment in an attempt to wriggle free from its hold. The cold air that hit his chest immediately was a reminder though that this was no laughing matter and this temporary euphoria he felt was tenuous at best. Even at this more sheltered altitude, the wind that had picked up was biting as a freezing rain started to fall and this last burst of adrenaline he had been afforded after that plunge was sure to pass quickly. It was now or never Jamie decided, and he quickly pulled the coat back on after untangling it from the limb… a strong, albeit twisted piece of broken wood that just happened to be the right size and shape to double as a poor man's crutch once it was yanked free. Perhaps along with this cleared path there was some providence from above, he decided with a silent prayer of thanks and used all of his remaining strength to force himself up to a semi-standing position on his left leg, unprepared after the last hour of relative bliss for the sudden return of bombshells of pain that exploded in front of his eyes and wracked his right side at this ill-advised change in position.

"Ow… holy hell!" Jamie rasped in his remaining ineffectual voice and immediately wavered as the scenery spun and he fought the need to become physically ill while somehow managing to cling to his crutch and remain more or less upright. "I can't go down… not effing gonna ring the bell… not now… 'm so close… can't stop," he breathed through in combat style while bolstering himself and tried a half step. "No sharks… don't look for 'em… no pain… leg's probably already gone, so deal with it… Quince did… he made it… you'll make it… gotta keep swimming… just like Dory," he added and referenced one of Kaylin's longtime favorite animated movies and his heart cried out for his three greatest loves. "Gotta get back for them... one more time for Eddie… one for sweetness... and for munchie," he focused and continued that mantra as he tried another step, and then willed himself through one more and again even as the ground became increasingly treacherous while the first drops of cold rain fell and immediately turned to ice.

 _The whole reason for the swim in the first place is just getting from point A to B. Nothing more,_ Quincy had advised him as the secret to success behind one of those many SEAL rules and Jamie vowed to continue on with a singular focus. _Our mission here is to walk again._

"Dad's right over there… I know it… please help me… get to him," he continued to pray and inch forward one halting, staggering step at a time in the direction of the Jeep along with the faith that his father had come for him as a familiar voice split through the ravine loud and strong to fortify his resolve.

"JAMIE! JAMIE, HOLD ON, SON! WE'RE COMING!"

* * *

 _Oooh, they're so close now. Let's hope the big guy can reach him before too long. Tune in for the long-awaited reunion up next although some of that help Jamie so desperately needs right now might still be out of reach until the weather turns, and that will afford father and son the time to bring us up to speed on exactly how they got from point A to B and where everyone else stands._


	93. Chapter 93

Chapter 93

"What's the plan, Rick?" Frank demanded as the retired Marine and NYPD rescue man had turned heel and was frantically trying to assemble some gear from what he could scavenge out of the back of the SUV with the intention of heading into the thick undergrowth to try to find his friend if it wasn't already too late. "Jimmy, get the first aid kit and give him whatever else we have," the Commissioner ordered his faithful detective to help although the small red bag produced from under the seat proffered little more than a few gauze pads and small bandages. There were two thermal space blankets in the side netting, however, and Rick quickly snatched those lightweight foil packages and shoved them in his pockets along with scissors and a few rolls of tape.

"Still trying to come up with one," the experienced medic admitted before huffing with relief when Nucifero returned from the opposite side of the car and added three heavy-duty but compact and powerful halogen flashlights as well as a set of charged long-range handheld two-way radios from a compartment under the floorboards. "Hallelujah, come to papa," he gave thanks while greedily commandeering one of each before sharing his thoughts.

"We know Danny was hurt badly in the crash so we have to assume Jamie was carrying some kind of injuries too if he was with him even though most of the structural damage to the Jeep aside from the fire seems to be on the driver's side door where it impacted the tree," he noted while trying to map out the most probable course someone with those limitations would take in an effort to get to the top of that ridge. "Not to mention he's still nursing that leg and didn't have access to his crutches," he continued while gratefully adding a few road flares to his kit.

"Concussion, four broken ribs and left arm," Frank confirmed his oldest son's litany of wounds. "He must have tried to brace himself against the door before they hit, but the doc said the worst of it was the shock he was in from losing all that blood where the artery was torn… we assumed that was from the trauma of the accident even though the surgeon said if he didn't know better he would have guessed it was a through and through," he paused while glancing back at the ground where that crispy body still lay under the tarp, for the first time pausing long enough to wonder who that was and what kind of role he had played in all of this. "The medics that found him reported he was incoherent and mumbling something about his brother being on the ground and dead over and over… that he was shot and wasn't supposed to be there. No one thought any different… except for Eddie," he grimaced. "What if Danny trying to tell us something?" he concluded shakily. "We have no idea what shape Jamie might be in. What if he was hit too? What if we're wrong and he was disoriented and fell in the river? What the hell went on here?"

"That's for one of your sons to answer when you get a chance to ask them," Rick stated optimistically as he looked down at the lightweight hikers he was wearing and wished for nothing more than a good pair of waterproof combat boots instead considering the terrain he was about to tackle not to mention the fact that the pinging freezing rain had yet to let up making for treacherous, icy footing which was never fun in the dark on uneven ground.

"He had to go up high, no one else would have made that effort. There's no obvious blood trail leading off and if Danny was unconscious, then Jamie did have the wherewithal to get him far enough away from the vehicle and stabilize his arm before climbing up there somewhere to make that 911 call," he reasoned. "He had his wits and ability about him because this side of a hill like that next to the river would be full of thick brush and rocks from erosion… the only break I see is that little deer path next to the water. There's no easy way up there from here."

"Then where is he, and why isn't he calling out to us like you said?" Frank worried as he looked around the dark once more and grew more troubled at the continued silence. "There's been nothing after the one that was cut off and it's been over four hours!"

"Could have been internal injuries that caught up with him… adrenaline wore off, the cold," Rick advised, hoping he was wrong but honestly afraid of what he might come across now when he got up there considering how easy it would have been for Jamie to take one misstep in the dark. "Or it could just be that he dropped the phone," he tried to hearten with a more benign excuse. "There's no time to waste, though. First, I've gotta find him and then we'll take it from there," he assured before pausing the check the battery level his own cell.

"Take mine too," Frank ordered as he handed over the phone and unlocked it. "When you get a signal, use it to call Abigail Baker and tell her what we need here… she's at the hospital, but can send a chopper, K9s and half a division from Manhattan North if we need them… and then have her talk to Pop and Erin so they know what's happening too. One of them needs to explain this to Eddie."

"Will do. Stay here at the car where you're safe and I'll radio back as soon as I know anything," Rick assured as he carefully pocketed the device and headed over to the edge of the clearing flashing his light and looking for some slight clue as to the direction Jamie might have taken. "C'mon, bud… make my job easier and let me know where you're at," he muttered, not knowing that his quarry was mere yards away in the opposite direction and had just lost his battle with gravity after tripping over an exposed root and landing hard on his side at the base of a short, abrupt incline leading up to the bridge abutment that might as well of been Mount Everest at this point since there was just no chance that he could navigate that on his own.

"Damn it!" Jamie rasped as he slumped to his back in defeat after attempting to push himself up the slippery slope one last time. He was so close now… nearly within the circle illuminated by the few spotlights ringing the perimeter after inching his way towards the glow for the last ten minutes… but exhaustion had set in and there was no way to force himself any further. If there was only some way to get their attention, he lamented with a voice completely absent now. "Help, over here!" he tried in a whisper anyway that was drowned out by the sound of the river before frustration took over and he slammed his hand down on the ground next to a pile of fist-sized rocks excavated during some recent work on the bridge foundation. The angle was too awkward for him to throw them in an attempt to gain attention so in a final act of desperation he picked one up and cracked it against another, hoping that the sharp sound would carry up where nothing else would and finally bring some kind of end to this part of the nightmare which by all accounts had extended well over four months now from a moment's distraction while crossing a street in Washington.

And it worked.

Standing outside his department vehicle with his jaw clenched and hands in the pockets of a heavy, tan overcoat as the rain was beading up on it, Frank Reagan rocked back and forth on his heels while looking for any sign of his missing son and wished that the years had not left him with arthritic knees that were no longer capable of going out and searching through terrain like this, relegated instead to stand on the sidelines and watch as a flashlight blinked intermittently among the trees while Rick attempted to scale that hill in a dual effort to find Jamie and the same signal he had used hours before to call for more help.

At first he assumed the odd noise or two he heard was coming from Rick kicking down loose rocks as he made his way through the brush, but it wasn't long before he saw that light in the woods pause and stand still… waiting and listening for something too… until it was there again and Frank's heart jumped with the realization that the seemingly deliberate knock was coming from less than twenty yards away somewhere near the base of the bridge. It wasn't until they heard it a fourth time that he was sure of its origin and despite the ice on the ground and those aging knees, Detective Nucifero could hardly keep up with his boss as he ran down the slight incline, calling out for his boy and flashing his light against the darkness.

"JAMIE! JAMIE! WHERE ARE YOU?! Jimmy, do you see him?" Frank demanded as Rick had likewise abandoned his previous path and joined them at the foot of the deer trail.

"No, nothing yet, sir," Nucifero admitted as three bright beams frantically searched over the ground until Rick finally spotted it… a gloved hand waving slowly back and forth for attention in the dark near the ground just down the path from them.

"THERE! THERE HE IS!" Rick yelled and then warned the other two men to stay put where they were above the path before he slid kamikaze-style feet first down the slick six foot embankment and skittered over to kneel next to his friend, all the while praying there was some benign reason that explained why he had been unable to call out or make up that final distance to them.

"Took you long enough, hose jockey," came the irreverent whispering rough huff that was barely discernible from less than a foot away and explained the first point as the two grasped hands and Rick was immediately grateful to hear that coherent bite in the comment and feel the strength in Jamie's grip as their fast friendship and trust in one another was instantly renewed after a rough patch.

"Hey, bud, you know I'm a _retired_ hose jockey now… how about cutting me some slack?" he kidded lightheartedly, grateful for the easy exchange between them after a few months of not speaking, even as his experienced hands were already running over his patient and assessing his pulse and temperature. "IT'S NOT TOO BAD!" he called out to those waiting anxiously from above and breathed an instant sigh of relief at the warmth he felt and the strong, thudding heartbeat which were always good signs, especially given the appearance of that jacket which even by flashlight was obviously torn and had been soaked at some point with blood.

"You hit?"

"No, not mine… from Dan… had to drag 'im 'way..."

"Okay, then where are you hurt?"

"Just the leg… think s'busted 'gain… fell down by a tree… got stuck… lost voice… doesn't matter…" Jamie managed to summarize succinctly in even, thankful breaths before getting to his points as there were other things far more important than his own condition on his mind.

"Danny?"

"Out of surgery," Rick assured even as he was unzipping that jacket while holding the flashlight in his teeth to check for himself that there were indeed no other major injuries like caved in ribs or bullet holes to contend with. For good measure he tore open of those handy space blankets and fortified the coat with more insulation tucked around Jamie's core before closing it back up once he was satisfied there was nothing to worry about there. "Last I heard he was still knocked out, but you got him help in time. That was a pretty ballsy move to climb up on that ridge, sorry it took us a while to figure out it was you," he chided with regret. "I must be gettin' old because I was having a hell of a time trying to hike up there myself so I don't know how you did it on one leg, but I'm guessing from the look of things I can tell how you got to the bottom. He needed a transfusion, but otherwise just a bad concussion and a broken arm and some ribs. He'll be fine but madder than hell when he wakes up and finds out what happened to his car though."

"Yeah, s'toast," Jamie breathed a huge sigh of relief as one of his biggest fears was quelled… his brother made it out of here alive. One down, one to go. "Ed?"

"She's okay, too. They've got her in a bed keeping an eye on her and the baby because she was upset when she heard that you…" he cut himself off, thinking twice about bringing all that up here in the moment and was thankfully about to be interrupted by an anxious father from above. "Erin and Henry are with her. Look, we'll talk about all this as soon as we get you someplace safe and warm, alright?"

"Rick, how is he?!" Frank Reagan demanded impatiently. "Why isn't he answering me?"

"He's… it's not too bad, sir," Rick assured again a little prematurely as he called out, given the significant amount of swelling he was feeling beneath his fingertips as he assessed Jamie's knee and upper leg… the fact that it had apparently given way in the same spot as his previous break was not a good sign and evidence that the strength of Kenzie's matrix graft had failed which would be catastrophic to her as well as Jamie's future. "He's talking to me, but his voice crapped out and his leg is done for now so we'll need to figure out a way to splint it and pull him up there. We just need to get him someplace dry and warm… don't try to come down though, it's like a luge run," he warned. "See if that deputy has any rope or straps in his car… and then we need something to slide him up on."

"How about that tarp?" Nucifero offered, referring to the current body covering.

"No, not big enough and it's too steep… he might slip right off even if we doubled it up and went sideways," Rick reasoned as he inventoried the scene in his mind and searched for something else that might work… something that was just the right size, smooth, lightweight and strong with handles. "Oh, you're so gonna hate me for this, flatfoot," he warned Jamie when he realized the perfect solution was just sitting a few yards away in the back of a cranky coroner's van.

"Get me a body bag," he ordered.

"Shut the eff up!" Jamie shuddered and railed against that idea, to be honest if he had been able he would have gotten up and run away… there were things in this life he never wanted to experience consciously first hand and that certainly ranked among them. "Nuh-uh!"

"Yes huh," Rick countered. "Look, you want out of here, right? Think of it as a long-term sleeping bag. I'll just zip you in, slide you up there like a toboggan and we can carry you over to the car in one shot… it's perfect… genius, even if I do say so myself..."

Thanks to Rick's resourcefulness, in a matter of minutes the four able-bodied men including a most helpful Deputy Daryl had Jamie safely extricated and laying in the cargo area of the Suburban with the heat running full blast and one of the back seats down to make room for his head as he had flatly refused to take a place on the more comfortable gurney inside the coroner's van when it was suggested.

"Never thought I'd be so happy to see you in one of those, Jamison," Frank sighed in relief as he slipped into the seat near him given the irony of what they were expecting that night as his son's body was further unzipped and Rick made a determined effort with a pair of dull scissors to cut away his pants leg and get a good look at that leg.

"Me either," Jamie agreed even as his voice barely crackled as he reached out for his father's hand. "Thanks for comin' for me, Dad… knew you would. Wasn't sure what was going on though."

"Us either," Frank admitted as there were so many questions that needed answers, but he was hesitant to push for them too soon given his son's state. Still, there was a body lying outside just thirty feet away that needed to be identified—the sooner the better even though he had his suspicions now considering what he had learned about Danny's injuries not all being due to the accident. For the last three months of fruitless searching since his disappearance he had feared the day when Mason Malevsky returned with the upper hand again. "Who is that out by the car?" he stated gently, anyway. "Son, it took us so long, because we thought that was…"

"Me… yeah, I sort of figured that out after a while when no one came looking… I was afraid that Danny… that I didn't get help in time..." Jamie managed to huff out sadly as he considered what effect that must have had on the rest of the family, his wife in particular.

"You did," Frank assured. "He was out of surgery and doing well when I left. It was you that we all thought was lost," he admitted.

"Ed, too?" Jamie managed to croak out before gratefully accepting a few sips of bottled water to quell his rough and dried throat.

"No, she refused to believe that," Frank encouraged. "We tried to reason with her, but she never wavered, Jamie. She's the one that put things together when we realized the 911 call had come from Danny's phone, but he had been brought in on the chopper with yours. She sent me here to check… wouldn't hear otherwise. It was her faith that saved you…" he trailed off, ashamed to admit that he had missed it himself and doubted her. "Now who is by the car?"

"Malevsky's kid, Matthew," Jamie choked out a little clearer now even as his mind was still on Eddie and her tenuously pregnant state. "They baited us here, and we fell for it," he offered in simple terms even as his focus and concern shifted stubbornly back to her. "She's okay, and the baby? She knows about me for sure?"

"She was fine when we left and being monitored on the OB ward… but just as a precaution," his father emphasized. "Erin and Eva are with her and Kaylin; Pop is floating between them, Linda and the boys with Danny," he assured. "But no, she doesn't know that we've found you safe yet. There's no cell or radio service down here and we're all stuck until the roads become passable. She'll be fine… they both will. They're in the best hands," he tried to hearten even as he had his own unease over the truthfulness of that statement given Eddie's near collapse while he felt Jamie's worry grow exponentially thinking about the doctor's warning of stress and the negative effects that could have on their delicate unborn baby.

"She'll know soon, bud… I promise," Rick rejoined the conversation as he had assessed Jamie's leg and had growing concerns of his own that the symptoms present might still indicate something serious like compartment syndrome where internal bleeding is present after trauma and the pressure of swelling in the muscle builds up to dangerous levels decreasing blood flow and oxygen to the rest of the structure. "We need to get this looked at now," he explained. "I don't feel an obvious break, but this area above and around the knee is really blown up and affecting his circulation. Does this hurt?" he asked with a deliberate poke.

"No, not much anymore, thank God," Jamie sighed in oblivious relief. "Felt like a white hot son-of-a-bitch at first though… swore it was broken again, but it numbed up after it got cold and feels better since I walked on it a little so maybe it's not so bad after all," he rasped hopefully.

"Maybe not… can't tell without my x-ray vision and I had to give that up when I handed in my papers," Rick tried to joke, although his stomach knotted up at that news since numbness or paralysis were late signs of compartment syndrome and usually indicated permanent tissue injury had already occurred which could lead to further complications… by all indications they were already nearing the end of the six hour window where the damage would be irreversible. "Listen, I'm gonna go back out and get to that hill one way or another even if I have to double-time it up that road on ice skates and call for help, okay? You just keep him warm and talking, sir," he asked after a quick check satisfied him that everything else was stable. "I'll be right back."

"Rick," Jamie's hand came up to stop him. "Just tell her I'm okay and that I love her and the kids. Nothing else matters, okay?" he begged. "Say it just like that so she knows it's me. Don't scare her or anything."

"I won't," Rick vowed. "I'll tell her you're in here getting warmed up and talking to your Dad," he reiterated to Frank before quickly ducking out of the back of the vehicle and looking behind with a nod to the van. "You should be fine, but if his pain suddenly ramps back up, have Jimmy wake up Dr. Sunshine next door and tell him we might have a case of CS that needs his help," he added while making an obvious cutting motion twice across the air over Jamie's thigh with one forefinger on a pretend scalpel before slamming the door behind him in a rush since the only recourse was immediate surgical intervention to release the pressure within the muscle with a procedure known as a fasciotomy.

"What? I mean... well, alrighty then, Jamison, you heard the man," Frank stuttered and then swallowed heavily as he demanded in his deep, authoritative voice since he had been privy to the look of concern Rick has just projected before leaving and he had a distinct feeling that his son was not out of danger just yet, especially given that reference to needing the medical skills of the seemingly useless coroner whom he would rather wring the neck of. "He said to talk, so out with it. How did we get here and what is Matthew Malevsky doing laying there dead next to the burned out Jeep? Where's his father?"

"Not sure right now," Jamie informed him honestly as he considered the events which had transpired to bring them here. "It all started yesterday when Danny showed up and insisted on bringing me back from Washington…" he began to explain and closed his eyes to remember.

* * *

 _Well, so our hero is not out of the woods, yet… literally or figuratively, lol, but there's been progress made and he'll start filling in the blanks as to the events of the past few months while they wait for help to arrive._


	94. Chapter 94

Chapter 94

" _Not sure right now," Jamie informed him honestly as he considered the events which had transpired to bring them here. "It all started yesterday when Danny showed up and insisted on bringing me back from Washington…" he began to explain and closed his eyes to remember._

* * *

"Thank you for your well-informed and detailed testimony, Special Agent Reagan, we will certainly take your recommendations regarding Dr. Charlotte MacKenzie's status under consideration. From a personal standpoint, for the record I'd like to say I'm glad to see that your recovery is going so well, and if that is an example of her work, it's most impressive," Chairmen Atwater remarked before banging the gavel down to close out two days of open committee hearings at the Rayburn House Office Building in Washington, DC, leaving Jamie with nothing left but to hope that he had done enough to sweep the good doctor's name out from under the umbrella of suspicion that had surrounded her after Oliver Wendell's arrest on a litany of charges from conspiracy, fraud and bribery, just to name a few. While the up and ups at the FBI had initially been content to beat their chests with such a high profile arrest while letting the residual chips, including Kenzie's career, fall as they may, Jamie had managed to convince Agent Sisco and his immediate superiors to follow through far enough to establish that there was no evidence to suggest that she had any part in the improprieties… although that did not guarantee the medical board would not pull her license or that another investor would be willing to pick up where Wendell left off and continue the funding for her study which had been shelved and put on life support for the time being, leaving Kenzie without a way to continue her advancements and many deserving veterans without the life-changing treatment they deserved.

"So will they clear her officially now, Sarge?" a familiar voice spoke up at his right side and that someone was kind enough to step forward and hold the heavy wooden door open as Jamie carefully exited the hall with his fancy, ergonomic forearm crutches, relishing in the fact that after three long months he was actually allowed to be lightly weight bearing and touch the ground with his broken leg as the gap in his femur was finally deemed nearly closed.

"Hey, thanks, George, I sure hope so," Jamie sighed tiredly as he acknowledged his former rookie who had been brought in to testify about Kenzie's insistence in supplying the FDA the absolute correct numbers in her reports, hoping to show that despite Wendell's meddling, there had been no intention on her part to cook the books as it were.

"I just wish we'd been able to bring up the bit of viral code you found on their computer system that linked back to the group trying to oust Kenzie's Rear Admiral uncle, but that was too Deep State for this commission," he admitted with distaste for the political world he had found himself thrust into before pausing after catching sight of Rick Fellows leaving through another door without a word to him. In the two months since the clinic at Columbia had been shut down, his former close buddy had refused to respond to any of Jamie's calls or attempts to contact him, and after failing to pass his own annual medical exam had been forced to accept retirement from the FDNY. While Kenzie herself had been more understanding of the situation and continued to treat Jamie, Quincy and her remaining patients to the best of her now far more limited ability, Rick had instead viewed this as a traitorous threat to his now-professed love's life's work and refused to hear otherwise. Jamie had hoped that would change after his efforts to schedule this hearing, but given the look of the former rescue man's back as he headed towards the exit without a word after sitting through every minute of the past two days' worth of testimony, that didn't look to be the case.

"Yeah, it sucks that they only wanted to hear half of what we had to present, but still… it has to be obvious to them that Kenzie was clean," George stated as the two slowly made their way down the hall together.

"Well, hopefully she'll get good news once they have a chance to deliberate," Jamie added even as his mind continued to rapid-fire review his own statements and search for anything missed that might have helped. "I just wish I could have done more."

"You did everything you could have. Speaking of good news though," George hedged with a wry, nervous smile while they stopped at the closet check to claim their overcoats. "Listen… Addie and I have something to share."

"Yeah?" Jamie glanced unsuspectingly at his former rookie as he handed over his ticket and waited at the counter. "You finally set a wedding date, man?" he assumed given the fact that Addison Greene and George Mahoy had become engaged during a self-professed most memorable trip to Red Rocks in Sedona the previous winter around the same time as Jamie's accident.

"Middle of November," George confirmed with a nod and a heavy swallow, although the blush that tinged his face belied the fact there was more to it than just that. "We, uh, well we originally really wanted to have it in the beginning of September, but then… well, it kind of had to get pushed back a little because we couldn't get the venue she wanted sooner," he stuttered before adding the truth behind the delay. "Addie didn't want to be standing at the altar nine months pregnant," he admitted in an embarrassed rush. "We, um… well, no, _I_ sort of forgot to put something important in my backpack for the engagement climb and it wasn't like there was a drugstore or anything out there in the middle of the desert that night, so... we're kinda pregnant too. Addie… she had some spotting in the beginning which scared us, but that stopped and we're far enough along now that it's safe to tell people."

"George, you dog! Eddie called it when she heard about your night, and I've been there!" Jamie clapped the younger man on the shoulder, genuinely happy for him although it was a little weird there was such a parallel with his own life and the unexpected Icelandic honeymoon conception considering his previous relationship with Addie and Eddie's continued involuntary twitching reaction whenever that topic came up.

"Although, I think by this point you have to admit you're more than _kinda_ pregnant."

"I know," George admitted with another laugh. "That's what Addie says too, but it's just been so hard to wrap my analytical brain around it… who would have ever thought last year that I'd almost be a dad already?"

"Well, I'm really happy for you guys... you'll be a great one and if you want any pre-baby training, ours will be like three months old by then, so we'll be open for sitters," he replied confidently, basing that on a full-term June due date even though his wife and their beloved tiny little munchie continued to skate along from one stressful bi-weekly appointment to the next still just under all the so-called normal percentiles for size and fluid levels and they had both been warned that the possibility of a premature delivery was not something to discount. Given that fact at just 26 weeks along, Eddie had remained home on modified house arrest with Henry on guard while nervously sending her husband off to Washington alone again, this time with the expressed mission to testify at these hearings and meet with his new employers to iron out the details of his proposed post in the FBI's Legal Attaché program, one that now looked more and more as if it would require a move down here as Jamie was wanted to start in the DC offices.

"We'll even throw in Kaylin for the whole big sister experience. That is if we're still in New York by that point."

"I might take you up on that, sir. I've never changed a diaper in my life and Addie is… well, she's Addie so she's definitely over the moon and beyond already," George admitted and described his emphatically bubbly fiancée. "I sure don't wanna disappoint her."

"I hear you," Jamie acknowledged and thought of how hard it was going to be to go back to the hotel and make that call to ask Eddie to leave their beautiful Bay Ridge home in the next few months—the one she had grown almost spiritually attached to, especially now that she was in a full-out pre-baby nesting phase.

"So, is your family going to be okay with a move like that?" George asked as he thought particularly about how disappointed the Commissioner would be, given their now close working relationship at 1PP which allowed for some informality. "I really don't see that's gonna be possible considering how excited your dad's been about having another grandchild at home to spoil."

"No, trust me, I've heard all about it already… they're definitely not going to be happy, but then neither am I," Jamie sighed. "I was really hoping to stay in New York, but the Director here is angling for me, and I sort of had to leverage that in order to get them to agree to push through this thing for Kenzie… it was the only card I had to play. As it stands now unless something changes I have to be ready to start down here the first of July."

"Woah! That's a huge sacrifice to make for someone else!"

"It's a big nut I owe," Jamie acknowledged as he thoughtfully glanced down at his leg which after a rough start was healing beyond expectations at this point. "To her and all those other guys… so I had to deal."

"Still… we'll sure miss you two though if it comes down to that. Want to share a ride to the airport tonight?" George inquired, saddened at the news, and assuming that they would both be on their way back to New York now that the hearings were over. "My flight's at six."

"No… I, uh, I'll catch a cab back to the hotel with you, but it looks like I still have some more business down here now," Jamie admitted as they pulled on their coats and he adjusted the messenger bag on his back before they walked slowly to the front door, still compensating for what had become his normal snail's pace. "I think I might be pushing my ticket back until tomorrow or the next day once I talk to Ed," he explained during their short four-block ride, something that would have never been necessary before this point, but the distance was still beyond him. "Figured I may as well stay to check out some of the schools and neighborhoods here while I have the chance so we know where to start looking for a house," he added pragmatically as they said goodbye in front of his first floor door after passing through the lobby. "Have a safe flight, George, and give Addie our congratulations. Eddie was sort of kidding about us having babies that are so close in age, but it will be fun to compare notes with someone else as they grow up. I haven't done the labor and birth or the newborn thing yet, but I do know a little more about a pregnant wife's over the top demands if you need any tips," he admitted wryly. "Although I wouldn't recommend busting your leg like this to get out of making those late night ice cream and pickle runs."

"Ha, will do, boss, and thanks… our best to Eddie," George added with a handshake before making his way off down the hall to his own room to pack as Jamie gratefully balanced on his crutches while slipping his keycard in the door, wanting nothing more than to go in the room, pull the curtains and lay down for a few minutes of quiet in the dark to recharge and head off an impending stress migraine before making that call to his wife that would confirm to her their lives were about to switch paths dramatically once more. All that changed in an instant though after he hesitated for a split-second before stepping into an already dark room and closing the door as a gruff, slightly drunken voice knifed over the noise of the air conditioner and had Jamie reaching for an off duty weapon that was no longer allowed to be there.

"'Bout time you got back, kid. I've been sitting here emptying the mini-bar waiting for your federal-owned ass to show up since this morning. You're gonna have a hell of a bill at check out. Hope the bastards at least comp you."

"Jesus, Danny!" Jamie huffed and sagged back against the door once he recognized who was there. "You nearly scared the crap out of me! You're lucky I didn't have my piece! I thought you were…" he trailed off before uttering the name Malevsky since the past few months of fruitless searching for their nemesis had done nothing but make everyone more jumpy. "Just how the hell did you get in here and why are you sitting in the dark?" he demanded before flipping the switch to illuminate the room and his brother's sour, scruffy face.

"And if I _had_ been Malevsky, you'd be dead... right about... wait for it… now," Danny lectured with a slight slur in his typical, overbearing way, which had only become more intense and paranoid in his brother's opinion over the recent months while the stress of trailing a taunting ghost was building as the dark circles under his eyes attested. "You really think relying on crappy hotel security is gonna be enough for him, especially in his hometown? HUH, HARVARD? You let your guard down! What am I gonna do with you?"

"So what? Coming all the way down here and breaking into my room to prove that I'm still vulnerable to him is your way of showing love, huh, BRO? It's not enough all that keeps me up at night as it is, especially when I'm away from Eddie?"

"Yeah, enough that you're gonna stay down here checking out the 'schools and neighborhoods' right?" Danny mocked with air quotes in his brother's own voice before adding. "I thought we all agreed you weren't going to make a move like that until we found this bastard? Nuh-uh, Dad said you'd be fine, but I knew you would crack as soon as I heard about this trip so I made sure that wasn't gonna happen. You're not taking a different flight or staying down here to go goddamn house hunting on your own. I've got a seat right next to yours on that plane at six tonight to make sure that doesn't happen; we've got family business to take care of at home and that comes first. So tell the effing FBI to eff off until then, and next time pick an effing hotel that has thicker doors and better locks," he growled and defended his obvious eavesdropping.

"DANNY!" Jamie barked in frustration as he felt his blood pressure rise. "He's already won even if we never find him, can't you see that? It's been months and we haven't dug up so much as a trace of him. Look at yourself! He got in your head, more than mine, and you're the one that let him in there! He's been pulling your strings even before TARU traced those damn emails about your old unit back to the computer in your own house! They told you he could have easily done it by hacking your wifi from outside on the street, but you never believed that and now you've got Linda and the boys moving between safe houses… she's going nuts and told Eddie last week that she's not sure she should even consider taking in that baby of Marcus's now while everything's like this! Your marriage is gonna fall apart again if you keep this up! I can't do that to my family! I won't! Eddie is pregnant and Kaylin needs her life to be stable!"

"Stable! What a load of bull! You're getting ready to rip her away from all of us and everything she knows back in New York!"

"For a _job_ , Danny," Jamie defended. "For a real life normal reason like taking a new job in a new city because that's what's open to me now, not because I'm scared of every shadow out there even though that's exactly what you were trying to accomplish by showing up and hiding in here to ambush me like this!"

"Then you're a fool. Mason's just stringing us along until we drop our guard."

"No! He's a damn psychological manipulator, and he planned all this to trigger your PTSD… guess what, it worked! He never wanted me to get hurt like that, I did it to myself so I wasn't fun for him to play with anymore and then he turned to you! He's sitting back laughing somewhere while you self-destruct! His job is done!"

"Sure, he's not in your head… that's why you flinch and ball up every time you see a blue car drive by or why you decided to change hotels to one just far enough away to make sure you needed a cab to get to the Rayburn Building without using a crosswalk because the fancy-shmancy Capitol Hill Regency up the street they put you in at first was just too damn close to use that excuse! Tell me I'm wrong!"

"What do you want from me?" Jamie sighed as he was forced to concede both those points were true… he'd been called out and knew it, and unlike his brother was unable to continue in abject denial.

"I want you to get your shit packed and get on that plane with me tonight!" Danny insisted with what could only be described as a half-demented grin before throwing his phone over across the bed face-up so that Jamie could read the email that was selected. "It's time we wrap this up, Reagan-style. Psychological manipulator, huh? Sitting back laughing somewhere while I self-destruct? Hasn't been a trace of him in months, right? Then that's the difference between Mason and you and ME… I NEVER GIVE UP!" he snarled with satisfied emphasis. "Look what came in an hour ago."

"There was a hit outside the city on that trace you put on the Chevelle parts," Jamie came up to speed as he paused to review the evidence. "Ascot blue paint and a factory headlamp for a '71 Chevy. Billing address here in DC but delivering tomorrow to rural New York…"

"Bingo, and not to a goddamn PO box either."

"But that's way up 219 over the North Jersey line though. Has to be under State Police coverage; the NYPD doesn't have any jurisdiction up there," Jamie reasoned as he checked the map. "Why didn't you just have Dad call it in?"

"Because I don't trust anyone but us to check it out. It could be that he sent it to someone else at another address, but this is the first lead we've had in forever and I'm not giving it up. Look, Mason was able to cover his tracks here, and he had the juice to get all kinds of things done like clearing the traffic cam footage… what makes you think he won't have a mole in the NYS to tip him off if that's where he's been holed up all these months? Not gonna let that happen," Danny vowed emphatically. "He finally made a mistake so now's our chance to nail him. We're gonna go up there and do some recon before we let the Commissioner make that call and spook him… C'mon it's less than an hour north of LaGuardia and my car's already in the lot so we can head up there right after we land. We'll just tell the girls we're stopping somewhere for dinner before coming home and confirm the address to see if it's legit… or maybe he really screwed up and he's there with Junior so then they can catch them both in their sleep."

"If it's him," his younger brother reminded, still dubious.

"See? That's what you need to learn right there… you say I'm paranoid, but I know how these guys think, and I'm telling you it's him and we're going to end this now before you even consider being stupid and going off on your own."

###

"So that's how Danny talked you into coming up here without letting me know what was going on," Frank reasoned with a frown at the additional information gleaned while adjusting the blanket covering his youngest son after listening to the details as they continued to wait in the back of the SUV for Rick to call out for reinforcements to come. "He laid the big brother knows best guilt trip on you."

"He is the best... usually… except this time Mason was better and it was just a trap," Jamie admitted as it felt good to get that off his chest… an adjective that could unfortunately no longer be applied to his leg as the increased warmth and immobility had brought with it some familiar bounding thumps while his pain level definitely began slowly to ratchet back up. "Any sign of Rick yet?" he grimaced noticeably after pulling himself up on his elbows and pushing the cover over in an attempt to see for himself just how bad things looked down there now. "Damn," he muttered as he took in the deep purple bruising now evident over the outside of his very swollen knee. "That doesn't look too good, does it?" he huffed before laying back with his hands over his eyes as he worried that months of surgeries and all that hard work at rehab had been undone by a simple slip.

"No, it does not," Frank continued to hover over his son, unsure of exactly what Rick had meant by that sawing motion and reference to CS he'd made before rushing off to hike up the hill in an attempt to get them help, or what level of pain he was supposed to let Jamie get to before summoning that incompetent coroner over here to try to do something about it.

"Let's give him a call and see where he's at," he offered as a distraction while picking up one of those long-range handheld two-way radios and hitting the talk button. "Rick? Do you copy?"

"Yeah, here, sir," came the crackly, out of breath reply a few seconds later. "How's our boy doing?"

"Starting to feel it," Frank reported ominously.

"How bad?"

"Nothing I can't take," Jamie chimed in, trying to sound chipper and desperate not to admit to anything that might panic his wife. "Did you talk to Ed yet?"

"No, I'm just about up to the top though… had to take the long way on the road, couldn't fight my way up through that brush and didn't want to roll down to the bottom and have to start over again… not sure how you managed to do it, bud," he admitted. "What's your pain level at?" he demanded. "The truth."

"Five," Jamie admitted before hedging. "Maybe six."

"Okay, sir… if he has problems talking to you over it or gets up to around an eight before I get back you're probably gonna have to do something about it. I'm seeing a flickering service bar here and there on your phone, so I'm close to getting through to someone, and I'll be back down as fast as I can without breaking my own neck, okay? I'll radio again as soon as I know what's happening."

"Sounds like a good plan," Frank acknowledged with a nervous chew of his lip as he glanced at his son once more. "We'll be waiting for you," he added before putting the device down and turning back to Jamie who appeared to be fighting it, but was in obvious growing distress.

"Doesn't matter," he was mouthing in an effort to convince himself. "None of it does… had to save my brother."

* * *

 _Next, as Jamie and Frank continue to wait for Rick to call in help, we'll find out where Eddie's at in all this as she gets word with Erin of all people that her greatest love has been found alive. Don't worry, I haven't forgotten about their little sisterly family feud… we'll see how that plays out next._


	95. Chapter 95

Chapter 95

"Well, everything's still looking good, Mrs. Reagan, other than the fact that your blood pressure is a bit higher than we'd like to see," the resident OB specialist assured quietly after finishing her exam and replacing the blanket over Eddie's legs and tummy on the otherwise darkened, quiet ward just before five that morning. "There are no changes to your cervix, and the monitor shows the baby's heartbeat is steady now plus you're reporting normal movements. We're no longer reading any contractions so the medicine and IV hydration is working… I think we're looking at a case of uterine irritability brought on by acute stress which can cause very real-feeling rhythmic pains, although thankfully if caught in time does not lead to preterm labor in the majority of cases, but you do need continued observation for the next several hours and to get some rest. Has there been any word?" she asked quietly, knowing only the basics of the situation that her patient's husband had been reported to be involved in a terrible car accident and remained unaccounted for.

"No, not yet," Eddie sniffed, still wide awake and willing herself to stay that way as she turned despondently on her left side, hugging a sleeping Kaylin with one arm around the little girl's shoulder while rubbing her own belly with the other hand praying that no matter what their munchie and her missing daddy would both be okay. "Are my mom and sister-in-law outside?" she worried now that their absence meant there had been bad news delivered they were afraid to share for fear it might harm the baby. "We're still waiting for a call to let us know."

"I see your mother sitting down by the elevators; I'm sure she'll be back in as soon as she knows I'm done," the doctor assured after a glance out the door, thankful to be finished with her work and ready to be on her way before the highly overprotective and agitated Eva Janko made a return appearance in the room. "She mentioned going to the cafeteria to find you some decent tea to drink."

"But not Erin?" Eddie pressed knowing that before Frank left he had charged his daughter to stay and look after her while Henry was occupied two floors below with Linda and Danny who was expected to regain consciousness soon and needed to be debriefed. Relations over the past three months had remained strained between the two women although to a much lesser degree once the Malevsky threat had taken precedence for the whole family and when Jamie had returned home with his senses intact after the FBI had swooped in to close down Kenzie's clinic he had laid down the law with his sister. The fact he also revealed that he'd been tagged to join the federal bureau on a permanent basis had sort of taken the focus off his wife who was equally shocked and left Erin blindsided and warned if she did not clean up her act that she might just find herself on the outside looking in should a proposed transfer to Washington go through since a four hour drive between points would surely cut down on the numbers at Sunday dinner each week.

" _Jamie, you would really leave the city… leave your family behind, especially now with this crazy Malevsky after us?" Erin had cried at the tense family meeting in late January when he had finally come clean with what had gone down behind the scenes at Columbia… a secret he had held for an entire week after Eddie insisted they tell him the truth on their end about Mason and the Templar resurgence since he was already suspicious about his brother's actions at that point, anyway. "Look what he's done to you already!"_

" _Erin, relax… it's not like I'm going anywhere soon, and I might not even have to; nothing is set in stone. I'm just telling you what my options are going forward, and my family is Eddie, Kaylin and our baby now, sis," Jamie had replied firmly for her and everyone else to hear, including a brother and grandfather who were wholly against his decision to become a Fed. "They're the ones I need to worry about and taking care of them now and for the rest of our lives is my first priority. The FBI's offered me a way to do that… to use my skills as a lawyer and a cop in a position where it doesn't matter if I can work the streets or not. Where else am I gonna find that, huh?" he questioned even as his sister shot a directed glare at their father, demanding that he anty up with a similar path from the NYPD which had not been forthcoming despite DCLM Chuck Miller's continued interest._

" _Yeah, it's not like there's many of those around, are there, Dad?" she spat back at Frank with venom, alluding to the spot which had already been filled in the legal department at 1PP at the start of all this._

" _Erin," her father sighed and added ironically considering the current circumstances. "We've been through that already… it's water under the bridge."_

" _He's right, now move on," Jamie had countered to let his dad off the hook, and as far as he was concerned the only option available to him that made sense included a post in the FBI's Legal Attaché program or "Legat," the core mission of which was is to establish and maintain liaison with principal law enforcement and security services both domestically and in designated foreign countries. There was even the possibility of an eventual assignment overseas, the reality of which had twisted Frank's gut tighter as the thought of being so far away from his son and grandchildren had him regretting that decision not to back Jamie for a position in the NYPD's legal division even more._

" _Besides, we have months to sort out this thing with Mason while I'm still rehabbing… I never said I would make a move before I'm done with that. He can't hide from all of us forever, and I don't even know where I'll be placed to start with… it depends on how long it takes me to recover now and where the opening is when I'm ready… it could be right here in New York at the federal building or in the DC offices. I'll have the opportunity to work on cases from cyber security to terrorism and organized crime. It's the chance of a lifetime. The bureau left the timetable open for now and guaranteed me a spot in one of those divisions whenever that is, so Ed and I will be making the decision together when the time comes," he reiterated._

 _If there was one thing Eddie and Erin could agree on by that point, it was the fact that neither honestly wanted to see this branch of the Reagan family leave New York, but the young wife and mother was determined to support her husband and make that sacrifice if necessary, even if that meant the possibility of giving up their beautiful home in Bay Ridge and her gold shield aspirations here in the process._

" _He's right," she added to buttress his argument, anyway. "I mean hopefully it doesn't come down to that, but if we need to… then I'm a hundred percent behind Jamie. It might even open up more opportunities for both of us," she reasoned sadly, firmly of the belief that if she should lose her chance in the squad with Rivera, there would not be another like it to come anytime soon._

" _So when will you know?" Erin continued eventually after running out of other arguments trying to dissuade them which had included another run at her father and a plea for him to do something to stop this. "Not before the baby comes, right?" she sniffed as the thought of missing that was almost too much to bear and had her regretting every unkind word that had come out of her mouth before this._

" _Probably not, but I can't be sure," Jamie admitted. "For now I just need to focus on my leg. I'm finally allowed up on crutches, but I can't be weight bearing until March sometime. Quince and I are sticking with Aaron, he was hired by a PT specialist in Midtown, and Kenzie's staying on at Columbia as an orthopedic surgeon as long as she keeps her license," Jamie had added with remorse over the fallout from the whole situation which had seen Oliver Wendell led away in handcuffs and a continuing cloud of suspicion hanging over the good doctor. "Let's just hope what she's already put in there does the trick for both of us because there won't be any redos unless she's completely exonerated and can find another backer," he added sadly, knowing that even a delay was putting other deserving men and women at risk._

It had been Jamie's continuing efforts to clear Kenzie's name which had taken him down to Washington to testify in a hearing on her behalf the previous day and then eventually for a still unknown reason to that bridge outside the city where he and Danny met with some kind of accident. No one it seemed except an unconscious big brother had any idea of what had happened yet, and while Eddie maintained an unshakable faith in the fact that her husband was still alive despite all available evidence to the contrary, Erin had skipped any such denial stage only to jump ahead straight into grief and anger at the loss of her brother and was in disbelief at her sister-in-law's insistence to the contrary. Every second that went by just intensified her fear that her father would call and reconfirm what she already felt… that Jamie was gone and there wasn't anything to be done about it.

Once more Erin found herself having a hard time holding her tongue without lashing out, but after the fallout and lessons learned the last time had decided avoidance was a better approach so when asked to leave the room for Eddie's exam she had sequestered herself in a small alcove down the hall next to the elevators to cry while clutching her phone and waiting for the dreaded notice to come. Eva had happened across her daughter's former nemesis on the way back from the cafeteria and despite the previous grudge held against her, felt genuine sympathy for the distraught younger woman and had stopped to talk to her, making sure that she was looked after and in fact that bad news had not been delivered.

"Mom, where is she?" Eddie begged as soon as her mother returned. "Did Frank call yet?"

"No, Erin just needed a moment to herself, lány, she'll be back soon," Eva revealed. "I think…" she hesitated before adding softly. "I know it is hard, but I think it would be good to put what was between the two of you in the past, no matter what happens now. She is in certain fear for her brother and afraid to show it to you… after what has happened to their family with Joseph I cannot blame her for this."

"So, you want me to apologize for not giving up on my husband? For telling everyone that Jamie's still alive… I know that even if no one else does!"

"Not apologize, Edit, that is not what I meant… just understand how it seems to her. We must all be prepared."

"NO! HE'S NOT… MOM! He's not… he's not gone… _not_ _anywhere!"_ Eddie railed back in a fierce whispering hiss, keeping in mind that Kaylin was still sleeping at her side while reminding her mother of the desperate, heartbroken attempt to hear her husband's voice again by calling his cell after being told he had died on scene, only to be startled when the device in Danny's personal effects bag rang instead. "I was right about the phone, wasn't I? Frank will tell me Jamie is okay as soon as he calls here, I KNOW IT IN MY HEART!"

"Yes, we hope for that way, but édesem, we cannot be sure… I am afraid there could be other explanations, as is she…" Eva trailed off gently. "Edit Katalin, there is no one here though who does not want to believe what you feel is true… you must remember that."

"She's right, Eddie," Erin sniffed from the hallway where she remained clutching her still-silent phone as a lifeline. "I want to believe you more than anything, and I'm sorry if I've said things before that make you think that I'm against you… I know we both love Jamie and I want you to be right, but hearing you say that he's still out there somewhere in the cold is making this worse for me. I'm just so afraid, all I can see when I close my eyes is him lying by that car after the fire like they said… and I can't bear to get my hopes up and then lose another brother again," she cried. "I need you to understand that!"

"I do, Erin, but I can't lose faith in my husband," Eddie replied, shaking her head before reaching out a hand to her sister-in-law which was finally accepted as Erin drew close and sat on the bed. "I won't, but I don't want to do this again either. Please, I need you to be _my_ sister right now, and Kaylin and the baby need their aunt. I don't want us to fight anymore. Come sit with me… just try to believe a little longer. Jamie and I always say that everything is okay, until it isn't," she reiterated with a familiar mantra and another soulful plea from her heart. "Nothing else matters until then."

All three women jumped as Erin's phone lit up and buzzed.

"It's Dad," she confirmed the incoming call with a wracking deep breath and after a pause three pairs of shaking hands gripped one another tightly with white knuckles to form a complete circle around the device when it was answered on speaker and dropped on the bed like a hot potato.

"Yes?" Erin breathed while waiting for the news they feared.

"Hello?" A different voice than was expected came over the line and immediately caught their attention as all eyes stared down. "Erin, it's Rick Fellows," he explained quickly before uttering the words that were beyond their hopes. "Listen, tell Eddie she was right… Jamie made that call. We have him… he was up on the hillside away from the car. Now he's a little cold and his leg's banged up again… it's probably gonna need some more TLC from Kenzie, but he's getting warmed up in the back of the SUV and talking to your dad; other than that I think he's gonna be okay," he hedged to assure them even though that was not a foregone conclusion in his own mind at this point. "I didn't even find any frostbite… somehow he kept himself from getting hypothermic. Do you understand? Jamie is going to be okay. We just had freezing rain move through and it's icy here though, so it's going to take us a little while to get him out. Thankfully the front passed by pretty fast. I need to speak to Baker and have her send in some help… we need a crew to salt the road so we can get back to the top where a chopper can land if they'll allow one to fly out…"

"Rick?" Eddie begged in a cold fog of her own now, wondering if she was hearing things and suddenly doubting what she was being told despite her unwavering faith to this point. "If it's true, then why isn't he talking to me himself?"

"It's true, Eddie… I swear. There's no cell or radio service down by where the cars are so I had to hike up to the top of a ridge… it's what Jamie had to do to get help for Danny. He said he slipped and fell and got stuck after he dropped the phone and couldn't get back down there right away when the rescue crew was here, but he was trying to all this time. Look, all he's worried about is Danny, you and the baby. He said to tell you he's okay though and that he loves you and the kids... that nothing else matters, okay? Told me to say it just like that so you'd know it was coming from him."

"He did?" Eddie sobbed finally as those words finally resonated within and she knew for a fact now that what she had prayed so hard for was true… that Jamie was alive and coming back to her in one piece… more or less. "It's him!" she confirmed with a beaming 'I told you so' conviction for both her mother and Erin who was already overcome with the guilt of having given up too soon. "But he's hurt? It's his leg again?"

"Yeah… I'm not sure what's going on… there might be another break or it's just really bruised. He was trying to walk on it over rough terrain without his brace or crutches so maybe that's what made it look worse. There's a lot of swelling over his knee though."

"So how bad is that?" she worried over the fact that Jamie had already been through the wringer with his leg after the initial accident and months of rehab.

"Depending on what's causing it there can be some complications if it gets a lot worse, but right now he's holding his own so I'm hoping it won't come to that. Listen, I gotta go, but I'm gonna keep an eye on it and we'll airlift him out of here as soon as possible and then let Kenzie take a look, okay? She'll know what to do. I'll call her right after I talk to Baker so she'll be waiting at the hospital for him, or if I know her, she'll be coming in on the bird herself," he added the more likely scenario once he thought about it.

"Okay, Rick, just please, please keep him safe and bring him back to me," Eddie begged and closed her eyes to give utter thanks once more just as the Reagan baby bean started a resounding series of sharp, interrupting jabs to her diaphragm as if for emphasis which along with the stress, hormones and lack of sleep sent her into an Eva-style mixed language run as she juggled two audiences. "Tell Jamie… ooh, geez little girl, kérem, stop… mommy's talking… Tell him I'm alright… Ow! And the doctor said baby is fine now too and… jaj nekem... I think she knows her daddy is coming home because she's kicking away right in there now," she paused to catch her breath with a slight hitch as she quickly pulled Erin's hand over to her belly to share the long-awaited intimate experience with her overwrought sister-in-law who had been held at a cold arm's length for almost the entire pregnancy before this. "And please tell him his whole family, his egész család, is together again and we love him. We'll all be here waiting…"

* * *

 _And now back to the bridge we go for the next part of the story to see what transpired there. Busy time of year, forgot what day it was , haha! Will try to stick with the posting schedule next week, but wanted to wish everyone Happy Holidays and best wishes for the New Year until then!_


	96. Chapter 96

Chapter 96

"I don't know how she did it so fast, sir, but Baker got them to clear a medevac flight for liftoff in thirty minutes once the icing advisory expires and I can already see the lights from a plow in the valley starting to work their way up the road towards us," Rick reported as he checked in via radio while making his way back down the steep incline towards the bridge in a semi-controlled slip-sliding manner. "He should get to us soon. If Kenzie can make it to the hospital in time from my place, she'll be flying out with it. Baker also said that Danny's just starting to wake up, and he's still stable," he informed the relieved waiting father and brother. "How's Jamie?"

"About the same," Frank answered and then looked to his youngest son for confirmation as Jamie nodded while his eyes stayed closed, the exhaustion he had fought off for hours creeping back in now. "He says the pain's still there, but it's leveled off again… he's talking."

"Good, that's good, sir," Rick confirmed. "Tell him that Eddie said your whole family is together again and waiting for him… Erin too," he added as Frank nodded in relief and gave silent thanks for that information, hoping that his decision to have her stay and monitor her pregnant sister-in-law had not royally backfired. "She also said that baby of his is strong and kicking away, so he better be prepared to keep up with her in a few more months when she's out and on the loose… plus a whole lot of what I think was in Hungarian that I didn't understand. Hope I'm not missing anything. Give me a few minutes and I'll be back," he signed out.

"The hormones… she's starting to sound just like her mother when she stresses… and this baby's gonna be just like Ed, I know it… plus Kaylin is… well, me," Jamie huffed in relief with a tired smirk at that news as he imagined life with so many beloved high-energy little women in his home at the same time and another still on the way. "Four against one; they're gonna wear me out," he rasped. "Aren't they?"

"That's a given, son," Frank smiled. "But you've always held your own against two older brothers and a sister so I'll give you the odds even though you're outnumbered."

"Then I have to get better fast, don't I?" Jamie fretted as his mind continued on the same track. "The baby's due in June, that's only three months away and we need to be in DC by July… have to be able to start on time… I have to… I gave my word to Director Dixon I would. If I don't that job won't be there for me anymore and I need it, Dad… I need it because Ed can't do everything on her own… she's been willing to give up so much and now because I was selfish I have to ask her to leave… I can't mess that up."

"She won't be on her own, Jamie," Frank assured as he tried to quell the panic that was starting to well up. "Neither will you… and you're not selfish for standing behind Kenzie, that was a hell of an admirable thing to do. The job will work out one way or the other, it always does, and you heard Eddie... your family is all together again and you'll have more help than you'll know what to do with no matter where you are, I promise…. Now," he paused, still trying to distract and keep his youngest son focused while getting to the heart of how they had all ended up here in the first place… a specific worry with perhaps further consequences coming to mind given the circumstances. "The accident… how did it happen? Son, you said Danny was drinking all morning in DC… that didn't continue on the plane, did it? Jamie, I know he's been under a lot of stress lately, and I've been trying to get him to accept help, but there could be charges if he was driving…"

"Drunk? No, Dad," Jamie shook his head. "I cut him off right away… hours before we left. He hadn't had a drop since then… only coffee. That had nothing to do with this, I swear."

"Then what happened?"

"It was a setup, the whole thing," Jamie admitted with regret at not doing more to stop his brother from taking this fool's errand. "We should have known better, but I couldn't talk him out of it… he said he would do it on his own otherwise and I couldn't let him, Dad… he drove us straight up here from the airport and before we even got to the address, Mason was on us," he remembered. "He was waiting… must have tagged us with a GPS or something and pulled out of a road in front of us in the Chevelle so close that Danny had to slam the brakes. He wanted to piss him off so we would chase them. GOD, WE WERE SO STUPID!" he swallowed hard as he remembered those familiar flashing authentic headlamps that had fishtailed past them in the opposite direction. "THERE WERE TWO LIGHTS! The damn car was already fixed! He was spinning his tires and headed this way… too fast for the Jeep on these roads but that didn't stop Danny… there was no service to call for help, and I couldn't get through to him, Dad! I tried!" he begged for forgiveness for what was to come next. "But he was locked on and it was like his mind was somewhere else…"

 _"Remind me never to take you on another stakeout, kid, and I thought you were more worried about Eddie because you were too chicken to call and tell her you were taking the job in DC?" Danny griped as they neared their destination. "She's gonna be really pissed now that you let her work on the baby's room, isn't she? So what does it matter when we get home, huh? Let them finish it and get it out of their system. Dad swore the girls will be there with her painting and decorating all night. Pop even went home, and if I know my wife and our sister, those mommy hormones have kicked in and they've all made up while painting the walls and knitting a dozen matching pink and yellow baby blankets singing Kumbaya together or something so we have hours yet. Do you want to find this guy or not?"_

 _"Yeah, of course," Jamie admitted as he felt badly for allowing Eddie get ahead of things like that, but her urge to nest had been unrelenting in recent weeks and with the threat of bedrest looming she needed to have that room done to find peace. "I just have a really bad feeling about this," he muttered anxiously as he considered pulling his insanely expensive primaloft jacket off to prop as a cushion under his knee before deciding against that and instead readjusted his uncomfortable seat for the tenth time. "Cripes, Danny. This thing is like a rock. There's no leg room. I'm sitting here and this damn brace is digging into the back of my thigh," he said as he unbuckled and removed it, placing the necessary but unholy implement of torture as he had taken to calling it on the back seat next to his crutches. "I think it's time you get out of the stone ages and find yourself a new car. I mean, does this one even have airbags? How can you drive your family around in it and not worry?"_

 _"It's paid for, and it runs," Danny growled as he gave his brother a sideways glance. "And yes it has a few airbags. Man, you've really become Mr. Mom lately, haven't you? I mean you were the one that used to drive around in a forty-year-old car that definitely had no safety equipment and had a dash that was hard as a rock. I can't for the life of me figure out how you came out of that accident at the pier when you totalled it with only bruised ribs."_

 _"Just lucky, I guess," Jamie swallowed. It made him nervous right now to talk about that night with the Chevelle out there somewhere, lurking in the shadows. "Besides, it was a classic."_

 _"Classic, my… LOOK OUT!" Danny's thoughts were interrupted as he was forced to jam heavily on the brakes and Jamie was thrown painfully into the passenger-side door, striking the side of his knee against it when a vehicle suddenly pulled out of the intersection directly in front of them and the brothers' were shocked to see the very car driven by the same sneering face they had been hunting for months slide sideways past them, with Malevsky hauling on the wheel and throwing gravel off the shoulder of the road._

 _"SON OF A BITCH! THERE HE IS! I told ya so! Now we're going to end this once and for all!" the older Reagan brother added as he threw the Jeep into a rough 180° spin to follow. "Keep your eyes peeled!"_

 _Jamie could feel his heart start beating through his chest as he watched the taillights bob back and forth dangerously just ahead of them on the road as he was mentally calculating the stopping distance between the two vehicles while they travelled at breakneck speed over the twisty, winding roads that followed the river._

 _"JESUS, DANNY, BE CAREFUL!" he yelled as they barely missed sliding through a sharp bend that the car ahead easily made when sudden realization hit… there had been two lights shining in his face when the Chevelle had turned. "It's a setup! He wants you to follow him!"_

 _"NO SHIT!"_

 _"It's slick out here! You know that car corners better than this one! He's trying to wreck us!"_

 _"SHUT UP AND LET ME DRIVE!"_

 _They were so close to having some answers now, the worst thing they could do was lose him._

 _Another mile or more went by in what felt like a single heartbeat as all signs of other life dwindled off and the area became more and more remote closer to the water as the Reagan brothers were left staring at a lonely yellow dotted line until even that disappeared into no more than one lane. Danny's eyes were straining as he struggled to follow the car ahead. There was a nearly full moon that night, so there was some light reflecting around, but it was soon apparent that they would not be able to keep up with the speed of the Chevelle without risking a crash on the narrowing roads along the waterway._

 _"Danny, I think we need to call it quits!" Jamie hissed again after one particularly harrowing hairpin turn. "We're gonna end up off the road and in the river if you keep this up! At least we nailed the search area down. We'll have Dad call in the state cops to watch and we'll get him! That address listed on the sales slip must be around here somewhere. Even the GPS is iffy in these mountains." Jamie pulled out his phone only to note there was still no service available. "DANNY, C'MON!" he tried once more to break his brother's focus by grabbing the arm that was gripping the wheel like a white-knuckled vice lock._

 _"NO! WE'RE NOT LOSING HIM AGAIN!" his brother stubbornly railed back and released his hand trying violently to shrug him off, shoving his own brother to the side just as both cars crested the hill and began a steep descent towards a narrow bridge below on essentially a single lane road, a miscalculated turn of the wheel sending the left side wheels of the Jeep off the shoulder of the narrow blacktop and onto the slick, wet leaf pack where they immediately lost traction and picked up speed._

 _"Danny! What are you doing?! STOP!" Jamie cried as he braced himself against the dash, still gripping his phone._

 _"CAN'T!" Danny shouted in desperation after finally snapping to. "NO BRAKES!" he yelled as the car continued to slide and he struggled to control the vehicle and not roll it over into the ditch. His mind was racing and Jamie's prior comments about the lack of airbags were first and foremost in his thoughts. There were only a few options at this point, try to thread the needle of the narrow one-lane bridge with an out-of-control car, take it into the trees to avoid slamming into the concrete buttresses, or miss completely and go down the steep bank into the angry, swollen river below where they would surely drown._

 _"DANNY!" Jamie screamed as his brother opted for door number two, pulling on the wheel sharply and sending the car sideways in the last instant to slow its momentum and slam the driver's side into a row of trees right at the base of the bridge. The sound of crashing, twisting metal enveloped them as mud sprayed and tree limbs snapped from the onslaught._

 _And just as suddenly it was quiet._

"I thought he was dead," Jamie admitted finally in a hoarse whisper to his father after a long pause as he bit the inside of his lip hard enough to draw blood. "At first I mean… all the damage was on his side of the car. He did that on purpose to protect me and for a few seconds when he wasn't moving… I don't know, maybe I was in shock or whatever but for a few seconds I just sat there and stared at him and didn't even try to help because I was sure he was dead and I was so pissed off at him for not listening to me… for leaving me alone like that. I couldn't think of anything else. Can you imagine?"

"Jamie, there's no right or wrong way to experience something like that," Frank tried to assure as he thought back to his own reaction at receiving such news, only with an opposite reality of being told he had a dead younger son instead. "I'm just thankful what we both thought was wrong. When I got that call from the State Police last night… they ID'd Danny from his badge and said he had called 911 for help… that the car had burned and he was mumbling about his brother being dead on the ground. The body was unrecognizable… it looked like a single car accident, and we all just… accepted it."

"I know, Dad, I'm sorry about that too… if I hadn't grabbed his arm… I never expected him to react like that," he admitted in a voice that was finally fading again to the point where his father had to lean in close to hear him. "How did Ed find out?"

"Rick was with me… with us," Frank corrected before continuing to explain. "He drove straight up from DC this afternoon with Kenzie after the hearings were over… I guess they had a few hours alone to talk about what's next for her and she apparently gave him an earful about hanging any of that on you once Chairmen Atwater pulled her aside and made it clear that if it hadn't been for your efforts, her career would be over. Rick came by the house to talk about taking a leave from the EDP Committee while he was helping her come up with whatever's next. He stopped at your place hoping to speak to you first but Eva told him you weren't expected home until late. The girls were all upstairs working on the baby's room when we went back over there…" he trailed off.

 _"Frank, Henry, Rick… you're back. We weren't expecting you," Eva Janko greeted the trio of grim-looking men at the front door warmly with a smile that soon faded when it wasn't returned. "Something's happened," she whispered and instantly read Frank's solemn expression as he nodded and her breath hitched._

 _"Eva, there's been an accident," he managed to choke out in a low voice as it had been hastily agreed upon by the three on the short ride over to keep the worst of the details shared over the phone by that nervous State Police Lieutenant to themselves until they could get the women to the hospital and Eddie in particular to where she could receive prompt medical attention herself given the growing precariousness of her own condition. There had been upgraded warnings in recent weeks about preterm labor as her risky pregnancy had progressed to the point at 26 weeks where there was now the real threat of being put on enforced bedrest to keep the precious baby inside her as long as possible._

 _"There's very little information," he reported honestly. "All we know for sure is that Danny's been hurt and was flown to the trauma unit at the main Columbia Presbyterian Medical Center. He's unconscious with a broken arm and possible ribs and internal injuries. We need to get Linda up there."_

 _"And Jamison?" Eva pried with now grave concern for her son-in-law since no one had confirmed to her that he was okay and she was adept at reading between the lines. "Frank?"_

 _"He's… he's still on scene," Henry managed to gruff out and answer for his son even as his heart ached for his youngest grandson. "They only needed to fly Danny… that's all they would really tell us until we get there," he tried to deflect as if it was some kind of regular police procedural thing although the older Janko woman suddenly understood, anyway._

 _"Oh," she gasped and looked once more at their faces to see if she was wrong, but the tears glistening in all of their eyes spoke the truth. "Oh no!"_

 _"Eva, for Eddie's sake..." Frank trailed off before starting again. "For the baby… I think it would be better if she heard it there," he tried to emphasize even as his own chest knotted and he wanted nothing more than to fall to his knees in grief. Rick had placed a knowing hand lightly on the Commissioner's back, and at the moment, that steady touch was the only thing that was holding his six-four frame up._

 _"Mom?" came the happy-sounding voice from upstairs that was about to be broken. "Is everything okay? What's taking you so long down there? C'mon! We need you to break the deadlock on the accent color. Kaylin and I want yellow, but Erin and Linda are stuck on green because of the Irish thing."_

"She figured it out," Jamie assumed, shaking his head as he berated himself again for all the stress this had caused his family, particularly his wife and their most vulnerable little member. "Before you got up there… she figured it out."

"Yes, Jamie… Eddie figured it out," Frank admitted even as Rick returned to the vehicle and opened the back door to slip inside, relieved himself to find his friend in essentially the same state he had left him.

"Should only be just a few more minutes," he confirmed even as he was blowing on his cold hands to warm them up before lifting the blanket to check on things again.

"At first she thought like everyone else," Frank continued his explanation while barely missing a beat. "And by the time we got up to the hospital it looked like the stress might have caused her to go into labor… she felt some contractions so they put her in a bed to monitor her, but somehow… somehow she managed to absorb all that and still keep her faith in you," he added. "When she made that call to your phone and the one in Danny's bag rang instead… everyone was so wrapped up in their grief we ignored it and no one else was able to focus on what that might mean except her. We had all accepted what the medics on scene were telling us… that you had been killed in the accident or the fire that followed, but Eddie, your wife who loves you with all she has and should have been more blinded than any of us… Jamie, she figured it out, and from the looks of it just in time."

* * *

 _Next, a little more from Danny's perspective as he rejoins us and explains to his wife and grandfather what happened after he was injured and the Chevelle returned._

 _Sorry for the late posting, but the site has been giving me errors all day while trying to upload the new chapter. Hope everyone had a Merry Christmas!_


	97. Chapter 97

Chapter 97

"It's Dad! They're almost here! He says they're only a couple of minutes out. He's on the helicopter too along with Kenzie," Erin reported excitedly as she jumped to her feet after the ding of the awaited text message came in. "I'm supposed to meet them downstairs at the North elevators on Danny's floor."

"Wait, you?" Eddie questioned, preparing to go herself as she sat up and tried to quickly untangle herself from Kaylin, the sheets, her gown, the IV tubing and monitor wires. "You mean _us."_

"No, lány, you mustn't," Eva stepped in to stop her. "I will not allow it. Erin will go look after Jamison and tell us what is happening to him. The doctor said you are to stay in this bed the rest of the morning for observation and to finish your medicine to make sure the contractions do not start again. You will do that and keep the baby safe, my unoka must come first," she emphasized with her arms crossed and the familiar look of a dedicated, unyielding grandmommazilla.

"Mom! I need to see him!" Eddie argued back.

"And you will, I'll make sure," Erin vowed in a renewed, sisterly way. "Stay here with Eva and as soon as they have him settled somewhere I'll come back and take you to him, okay?" she asked. "I'm sure he has to go for x-rays and stuff first… by that time your meds will be done and maybe they'll allow you to go down in a wheelchair. Dad said he's awake so he can call you right away on your cell. Just hang on… I'll let you know every single thing that's going on in the meantime. Trust me?"

"I… okay," Eddie settled back against the pillow only because she felt another worrying twinge below that scared her. "Just please hurry! I really need to see him!"

With that, Erin was off on her mission hurrying down the nearest stairwell to the fourth floor and then across to the far side of the building where the elevators for the helipad were located. She was anxiously chewing her nails when the ding and the downlight indicated the wait was over. Even though she had tried mentally to steel herself for Jamie's appearance given the fact that he'd apparently been flailing around in the icy cold woods the entire night, she was not prepared for the urgency with which the gurney was pushed through the opening when the doors opened as a pair of flight medics, Dr. Kenzie and Rick were on the move flanking either side. Luckily for everyone involved there had been enough room on the high capacity, double engine aircraft that had been sent courtesy of Baker's forethought. Jamie's eyes were half-closed and aside from a small wave of his hand and a twinge of a smile there was little acknowledgement of her presence by anyone else until a familiar, deep voice behind her spoke up after the rest had disappeared out of reach with a bang beyond a set of double doors.

"Erin," Frank called tiredly to his daughter as he stepped out of the car at a slower pace, suddenly feeling all of his years after the stress of the night.

"Dad!" she whipped around, trying to come to terms with how she was going to explain this to Eddie after the promises made and having come off as so positive and overly confident. "I thought you said he was okay and awake! Eddie is expecting to talk to him right away! What happened?!"

"Sorry, things were happening so fast… Once Kenzie got there she gave him something to put him out a bit so she could explore his leg and take action on the way in if needed," he explained with a tight swallow given the gruesome details of what had been described to him as essentially the worst case scenario since that would require a large, crude, very deep, ugly cut straight up the side of the already compromised leg to expose the muscle compartment and split it open if needed. "There's a lot of swelling and pressure built up in the tissues above his knee. If it's too high and she can't bring it down, he needs surgery immediately to release it before it causes permanent damage… with the delay in finding him, we're already on the outside of that window," he admitted grimly.

"She's taking x-rays and the pressure readings now, so we should know in a couple of minutes," Rick confirmed as he rejoined them, having been outed from the exam room by a tough charge nurse. "They're clearing an OR right now if she needs it… Busy trauma night, lots of car accidents with the weather and they're just finishing up with a gunshot victim that was brought in a few hours ago."

"Another surgery?" Erin sighed at what her brother and the rest of the family had been put through already. "He was just starting to walk again! Now you're saying he might lose that or worse too?"

"Let's hope not," Rick added without much conviction as Kenzie had immediately confirmed his concerns upon arriving on a chopper in the middle of the night like old times dressed in an oversized flight suit, her auburn hair pulled back in a tight ponytail, goggles on and an all business let-me-focus-on-my-patient attitude.

"Have you seen Danny?" Frank shifted the subject to his oldest son in an effort to find something more positive to talk about since honestly the notion of what had almost been done to his youngest in front of him in that helicopter had his stomach twisting and churning.

"Not yet," Erin admitted with a frown. "Pop stayed with Linda when they brought him back to the room and the boys are down the hall with Baker. Gramps said Danny was awake but still too weak and fuzzy from the blood loss to talk to and there's a guard on the door now!" she fretted. "What's that about?"

"Jamie confirmed that Mason was behind this and he's still on the loose," Frank explained. "That was his youngest son, Matthew, who was dead next to the car. He's going to be out of his mind now, as if he wasn't before, and he has more than a six hour head start on us again. I'm just taking every precaution. As soon as we can we're going to move everyone together in the same area so it's more secure. I've already called up to have Eddie, Eva and Kaylin brought down and put on the same wing as Danny. How is she now?" he questioned, worry for his daughter-in-law and unborn grandchild still pressing on top of everything else.

"Good, I think... at least okay for now. They talked to Dr. Geisner this morning, and she wants her to come in for another scan as soon as she's able to make sure her fluid level is still okay, but the doctor here said this was caused by some kind of false contractions brought on by stress. She's supposed to stay in bed the rest of the morning and off her feet for a few more days until they're sure nothing will come of it. Once she hears about Jamie or this Malevsky thing though…" she trailed off. "She's gonna get upset again. Did he tell you how Mason got away? What happened out there?"

"No, he didn't get a chance to finish," Frank revealed as he glanced around the hall, relieved to see familiar members of his detail taking up positions around the floor. "His voice gave out, and he was too exhausted to keep going. He just told me it was a setup to lure them out there and then the accident happened when Danny lost control of the car. If we're going to find out what came next anytime soon, we're going to have to hear it from him. I think Jamie is going to be out of pocket for a while," he finished with a swallow as he spotted Kenzie returning to give them the update.

"So the pressure reading says it's not compartment syndrome, at least not to the point where we have to do a big, bad, godawful fasciotomy so I'm glad I waited," she confirmed while standing just outside the door, making it obvious this was going to be a quick report before returning to her patient with haste. "That's the good news. I did an ultrasound, and he does have a blood vessel leaking on the side of his leg which is causing a very large hematoma to develop… those can be nasty and painful enough to mimic a broken leg. Hopefully, I can go in and repair that quick and then just put a drain in," she explained. "It's a lot less invasive and the recovery time is better. The x-ray did not show an obvious break, which is also good, but there's some fuzziness around the locking pins and screws holding the nail in the femur above his knee so I need a better scan… something might have let go or there could be a spidering spiral fracture around the pin site. If there's too much damage, it could indicate the bone is too far compromised and there could be a catastrophic failure. I'll try to scope it when I'm in there if I have time, but we need to fix the bleeding and get some of this swelling down and watch his kidneys before anything else. He's dehydrated and clearing muscle damage like this is hard on them. It could be days before we know for sure," she warned before turning to go back to her patient. "This procedure should only take about an hour after I get an OR though."

"I should go talk to Eddie, she'll be down here any minute," Frank resigned after Kenzie disappeared before being surprised when his daughter called him off.

"No, Dad… I'll do it; I promised I would tell her everything," Erin insisted. "Go see to Danny. Please, let me handle her, okay? I asked her to trust me… I need her to do that again if we're going to put everything else behind us, and I want Jamie to see that he can count on me."

"Alright," Frank nodded, glad to see progress on that point. "Just stay in the room with her then until I have the security squared away. I have a bad feeling we haven't seen the last of Mason," he added prophetically before turning to go and seek out his oldest son, not knowing that card had already been played and their nemesis was already in the building although not in a state that was expected, and that the end to all this was closer than anyone thought.

###

"Danny… Danny... honey, please… I know you can hear me now so stop avoiding it… you have to talk to us," Linda begged again as she and Henry worried over her husband who had been semi-awake for the last hour or so but was slow or unwilling to respond otherwise after coming through emergency surgery to repair a broken left arm and a badly damaged artery which had left him in shock from blood loss before his arrival here. His wife had been relieved to see his color and other vitals improve to nearly normal, and she was desperate to share the news that Jamie was indeed alive and had been retrieved from the scene in case all this was from harboring fear over his younger brother's condition. There was really no way to tell what Danny remembered about the accident to this point, however.

"M'm 'right," his open-eyed grumbly reply shrugged her off even though that was still music to their ears as some of his senses finally seemed to return. "Leave me alone."

"Danny, don't you want to know about Jamie? You haven't even asked about him yet!"

"Don't have to say it; kid's hurt, right? Wrecked his leg 'gain to save me… shouldn't have..." he trailed off irritably.

"DANNY!" Linda cried at his defeated tone and her heart clenched at that depressed admission after months now of watching him spiral downwards. "Don't say that!"

"He shouldn't have _been_ there, LINDA… s'my fault!"

"C'mon, now, Daniel Reagan… even doped up to the gills you're better than this," Henry gruffed with frustration after watching this build up despite his obvious relief at seeing his oldest grandson starting to come back to them after this latest scare. "Your father just flew in with Jamie and he'll be here any minute to talk to you, so buck up a little now. Between the two of you we need to get to the bottom of whatever the hell happened out there last night!"

"Wait… just came in?" Danny puzzled as that revelation finally engaged his mind and a free hand came up to rub his aching head, even with a concussion it was hard to stop his brain from clicking together pieces. The fact that his brother had been out there all this time after being the one to call for help made no sense to him although he had lost consciousness soon after Jamie had pulled him to the side of the clearing and left to find help. "Time s'it?"

"After six in the morning," Henry answered.

"And Jamie was…"

"Your brother was missing in action up on that hillside for a few hours," a deep voice from the doorway inserted. "He's having some fluid drained off his knee right now, but he's going to be fine," Frank downplayed to the extreme as he took in his oldest son's condition, and knowing what he'd been told had already decided to take the next part of this slow and easy… something about the way Jamie had described his brother's actions over the past twenty-four hours and the dull look in those usually intense brown eyes right now told him they were at a tipping point that needed to be dealt with carefully. For a moment he considered sending Linda out of the room while they talked, but since she was usually the best at handling him in such matters that was probably the wrong move. Instead he decided to invite someone else to join them… someone he trusted to whom he had spoken the night before about Danny's reactions to stress the past few months and had a particular knack in dealing with veterans and EDPs in crisis.

"Rick," he gestured into the hall. "Will you come in, please?"

"What is this?" Danny reacted with suspicion as he tried to focus between them—the drugs, binding splint on his arm and headache leaving him feeling vulnerable and surrounded now.

"Rick was on scene tonight so he's familiar with it, and he can help figure this out. Danny," Frank offered gently, meaning more than the logistics. "I know you're just waking up and this is a lot to ask, but I need to hear exactly what went on out there. Can you remember any of the details? Malevsky's lost two of his sons now… we need to find him and end this before he has time to plan something else. Jamie was able to explain everything up to the point of the accident, but he didn't seem to know where Mason went or why," he started and immediately noted the heavy guilt that washed over his son's expression. "You need to tell us what happened next."

"I… I _can't,_ Dad. I don't want to even think about it!" Danny railed, and it was evident from his expression and the fact the heart monitor jumped that his stress level was building over that request which Rick was quick to register. "Just ask the kid, he'll tell you, please!"

"Dan… Jamie needs some rest and a little attention from Kenzie right now. I know it's tough, but you have to help me. I need you to fill in the blanks so I can figure out Mason's next move. You were hurt," he prodded to keep the perp talking like a good detective. "Somehow you got shot. The car burned and Matthew Malevsky ended up dead next to it. At some point your brother was desperate enough that he crawled up to a ridge in the dark on his broken leg with your phone... Danny," he nudged again using an untruth he knew would break the barrier and elicit a response. "If you're trying to protect him for some reason over Matthew's death…"

"JAMIE?! NO! NO! It was _my_ fault! He did it to save me, but he WASN'T supposed to be there!" Danny snapped in defense and then turned his head into Linda's shoulder for comfort before starting to explain...

 _A few moments had passed after the quiet descended before he slowly raised his head and took in a slight breath, just to test the premise that he was still actually alive. The shooting pain that began immediately radiating through his chest and arm pretty much confirmed that point. He had tried bracing himself against the door in the last second and his left forearm was now pointed in an oddly different direction than it should be. He bemoaned the fact that the driver's side airbag had not gone off since the car had impacted sideways. That meant that none of the others had either. It was several more seconds before it occurred to him that he had not been alone in the car. "Jamie," he whispered while attempting to push himself back off the steering wheel so that he could turn to the right, all the while trying not to take in any deeper breaths than necessary. Definitely some broken ribs to go along with the arm. "Kid, please answer me! Are you okay?" he pleaded._

" _Yeah, Dan… thank God," came the whooshing, relieved reply back as if his youngest sibling had been holding his breath and thinking the worst all this time… which of course he had._

 _Mercifully, the car's interior lights had wound up turned on somehow so that Danny was able to see his brother when he managed to twist his body around sufficiently. It took some work to do so, and he realized that the compartment had been pushed in around him and he was somewhat trapped at this point. The passenger side seemed less damaged, but Jamie was still sitting motionless with his eyes fixed on him and a sickly white pallor etched on his face._

" _I thought… I thought," he was still mumbling and given his look it was clear just what that fear had been. "I mean I thought you were…"_

" _Well, snap out of it 'cause I'm not… just banged up a little… So use that brain of yours and think of a way... to get us... the hell out of here instead," Danny grumbled in short, sharp pants against the stabbing pain that was now starting to envelope him as the adrenaline waned and his head, forearm and ribs began to thump in blindingly in unison, preventing any coordinated effort on his own to free himself._

" _How bad is it? Can you move everything?"_

" _Yeah, think so… just busted my arm and some ribs when we hit. Goddamn it!... Son of a bitch it hurts though!"_

"' _Kay, I, um…" Jamie tried to refocus as he fumbled around. "Here," he picked up his cell off the floorboard, initially heartened that it was in one piece only to find as he feared that there was no bars available. "Crap… c'mon, I need your phone Danny, maybe it's better… mine's got nothing."_

" _Pocket," was all Danny could offer weakly before leaning his head back down on the tilted steering wheel and closing his eyes, the concussion getting the better of him and leaving the rest of the world spinning in a sickening counter-clockwise spiraling fashion. "46… 80… something," he recited the code to the best of his scrambled ability._

" _Eight, yeah, Joe's badge number, I know… no good," Jamie reported after fishing the device out to unlock and test it. "Too low down here… there's still no service."_

" _Stupid effing car," Danny moaned as he continued to lay with his head down trying to fight off the impending nausea. "Shouldn't even bother… Linda's gonna kill me, anyway."_

" _Well, before you worry about that, I gotta get some help," Jamie gritted at the thought of exactly how he was going to do that considering his limitations and reached for the door handle to pop it open after putting both phones in his pocket, once again thankful that his side of the car remained largely unscathed and that he had escaped serious injury, or so he thought, thanks to the seatbelt and that fortuitous puffy warm jacket that had cushioned his upper body._

" _Kid, you can't," Danny muttered. "I… I'm pinned. It's too much for your leg… don't wreck it, just wait for someone else to come help."_

" _We're in the middle of nowhere! I'll just go up the road a little way, maybe I can flag a car or get a signal up top. You stay still, okay?" Jamie added nervously at that last thought of his brother's—what if Mason returned? "You've got your piece, right?"_

" _Yeah, think so... you?" Danny caught on as he gingerly tried to reach his right arm down to his side before giving up._

" _No, left it at home, couldn't carry in DC."_

" _Take mine."_

" _No, Dan," Jamie disagreed since the only plan he could come up with involved leaving his near-helpless brother alone for a period of time. "I'm gonna get a blanket for you out of the back first," he added before hesitating as the open door allowed in a sharp smell of gasoline which permeated his nostrils and elicited a new worry and urgency in his voice. "SHIT! I think something's leaking!"_

" _Something's always leaking on this piece of crap… you ought to know that by now," Danny griped tiredly before he too caught onto the now imminent threat and his eyes opened in fear._

" _Jesus, is that the gas?!"_

" _Yeah, c'mon! The engine's hot! We're getting you out of here! I don't give an eff about my leg!" Jamie's heart clenched as the adrenaline surged and he forgot everything else while reaching over to pull Danny's jacket by the shoulder and physically drag him out over the passenger seat no matter his injuries._

" _I can't! Kid! I'm… OW! DAMN IT! I can't! GET OUT NOW!"_

" _YES YOU CAN, DANNY! JUST TRY!" Jamie screamed just as things went from bad to worse as a pair of headlights swept across the front of the vehicle as a familiar blue car returned and idled in the middle of that lonely one-lane bridge while a dark figure stepped out of the passenger seat clutching a shiny, hard object in his hand._

" _I'M NOT LEAVING YOU!"_

"He… he didn't," Danny replied shakily as his eyes took on a faraway look and Rick was suddenly concerned that they had pushed him too far as those were the last words they would get out of him for several hours afterwards. "He wouldn't leave… and I… I couldn't help him! He shouldn't have been there!"

* * *

 _Poor Danny's having a rough time of it now. Will he be able to tell Frank what he needs to know before Mason has a chance to return, or will it be too much to ask? Next, our pair of lovebirds finally have their reunion and Eddie explains to her husband just what made her send his father and Rick to find him._


	98. Chapter 98

Chapter 98

"Francis! I can't believe you walked out of that room and the nerve to tell me to leave too!" Henry's heated voice followed his son into a secured area down the hall from where his oldest grandson lay still clammed up for the most part with only Rick for company while an exhausted Linda went to rest with Jack and Sean who were sleeping in the next room and waiting to see their father. "That boy needs his family more than ever now and we've got to figure out where this Malevsky is! Danny didn't tell us anything!"

"And he wasn't going to… he couldn't, Pop… not to you, or me or Linda," Frank declared as he rubbed his tired, scruffy face and headed for the coffee carafe on the counter. "We'll just have to wait for Jamie now; it's been over an hour so he should be out of surgery any time. What happened at that car… it's brought up something from the past. Linda said that the words Danny was using… they're the same that he yells out during those nightmares he's been having for the past few months. Whatever he's harboring… it's something that he's been holding inside for the better part of fifteen years."

"Well that makes no sense!" Henry sniped back. "Jamie wasn't in the war with him… he was just a kid at the time… not even in college yet! Maybe it's from Joe… he's afraid to lose another brother."

"I know, Pop, but something has triggered this, and it started over in Iraq before we lost Joe. That damn Malevsky must have hacked into Danny's military personnel file somehow and he knew just what strings to pull all these months… bringing up his old unit and contacting the families. It's survivor's guilt… he wasn't able to save them and in some ways he's more damaged inside than his brother was on the outside. Mason started off trying to torture Jamie with the Chevelle and bringing up Joe like Sonny did, but then after the accident in DC he really turned on Danny and found a soft spot… and I didn't see it happening fast enough."

"Now who's feeling guilty?

"I AM!" Frank sniped back with his own sense of helplessness. "Nothing I've said to him since this started has helped; that's why I asked Rick in… Jamie says he has a way with this sort of thing, and he's proven that on the EDP committee."

"We were both Marines, Francis," Henry reminded him of their four generations of service dating back to his own father. "And we've both seen what happens over there and how it can come back over time… _you_ of all people know what it's like to lose men… your friends, especially after what you went through in Vietnam. To this day you refuse to talk about…"

"Because that's what's best for _me,_ but it's not working for Danny anymore," Frank interrupted before another detail or particular name could be spoken aloud. "I dealt with my demons all those years ago with Mary and Mom's help after I got back, remember?"

"Have you?" his father gruffed back with healthy doubt on that particular point. "That damn Chevelle holds ghosts for you too… it nearly split you and Mary apart forever. I'd be surprised if Malevsky didn't know _that,_ and used it against you. But back to what happened, don't forget about me; it took tough love, Francis. I had to kick you the hell out of our house for six months and listen to your mother cry over you every night and that still wasn't enough… Mary put you to the curb before you finally snapped out of it and saw what you were missing. You've been too easy on Danny… I told you that all along. All this anger on the job… he should have faced up to this years ago and it maybe it wouldn't have turned into a damn mess like now!"

"That wasn't all, Dad… I had to have something bad happen to me… or almost happen," Frank reiterated. "It took all that and nearly crossing the line before I finally hit rock bottom and could admit I needed help. Maybe Danny's at that point now and this is our chance," he added hopefully.

"Well, what about Jamie then?" Henry picked out another bone of contention now that he was in the mood to freely speak his mind. "Are you at the point where you're willing to let him and Eddie take our grandbabies away from us before you regret that too? What's this about him saying yes to the damn Feds and moving to Washington? I thought he was holding out for an opening here in the city?"

"He was, but he had to do what was needed to see that Kenzie kept her license, Pop," Frank explained. "It's important to him, and they wanted him in Washington."

"So he bartered this family's happiness away?"

"In his mind, the price was worth it… he did the right thing by her."

"And what about you, Francis?" Henry huffed. "When is the cost high enough for you to do something that goes against what you want or believe? Can't you just for once in your life give a little on that over-ethical hardass attitude towards your own kids and let them have their due? No one's asking you to pull a hook, just let him be… Jamie deserved that spot in legal before this whole mess started!"

"He didn't want it then… he wanted to be on the street."

"No… he didn't want it because he was afraid it would make you look bad. Well, Chuck Miller has zero incentive to offer him something like that to impress you… he's been in the NYPD since I left and his position is solid as that Deputy Chief. The only place he can move up to is your chair when you leave, and that's not your call. You know it, I know it, and so does the whole damn department! If he wanted Jamie, there was a reason! Now he needs it! If we don't do something fast by this time next year, we'll need to book tickets overseas just to visit Kaylin and the baby!"

"Even if I wanted to, that spot with Chuck has been filled," Frank reminded. "Jamie's expected to start in Washington on July first."

"And if he can't?" Henry pried, honestly more than half hoping that perhaps this latest injury would somehow set his grandson's recovery back just long enough to thwart those plans. "Then what?"

"Pop!" his son admonished. "I can't believe you'd think that way."

"Well, if he was _my_ son, I'd do something… _anything_ about it instead of sitting on my thumbs… As I recall there was a time back then when you needed my help get out of that hole you dug with Mary… I gave you a way to step up, not a shovel to dig yourself in further! Where would you be today without that? If you don't do something for these boys," he added while glancing back down at Danny's room. "We're going to lose them both!"

"Dad?" Erin's voice came from behind them as she worried over catching just the last part of that conversation. "Is everything alright? Is it Danny?"

"No sweetheart, he's doing okay… we're just giving him some time to rest and talk to Rick," Frank assured so as not to further upset her. "I thought you were staying with Eddie?"

"I was just coming to tell you… she's with Jamie; he's back from surgery and they put him in the room two doors down from Linda and the boys. Kenzie told her that he's doing okay now… she was able to fix whatever she had to and they did some kind of block that lasts a few days again so he doesn't feel anything in his leg or need so many drugs. They won't know for sure about the rest until she can have them do a high res scan, but from what she saw she's hopeful. I got them to put another bed right next to his while he's waking up so Eddie could lay there with him… they still want her to take it easy, but I thought she would feel better that way."

"You did that for her, hmm?" her father noted while hugging her with his first smile of the morning as hearing that news heartened him on many levels, even if that euphoria only lasted a few seconds. "Good job, honey."

"Commissioner," Baker's tight-lipped voice caught them all by surprise from the hallway. "I'm sorry to interrupt, but there's been some developments," she motioned him out in the hallway for privacy and it became clear from their brief but animated conversation that whatever it was, it required his full attention now.

"I need to go," Frank advised abruptly with an ashen face after turning back to his daughter and father for a moment.

"Francis, what's…?" Henry started.

"Mason's been found," his son reported without any further explanation. "Everyone's safe here for now, but this isn't over. Take care of them until I get back." he added, suddenly dreading what was sure to come next before disappearing down the hall with an uneasy step, pausing for just a moment in the doorway of each room to offer his boys a sad glance as he passed by… a puzzling action that was observed by both Eddie and Rick who were each still waiting for their respective Reagan brother to speak again.

"Jamie, I'm right here… everything's okay now, you're safe… at least I think so," Eddie qualified with a whisper and stroked his face and lay next to his right side on the bed Erin had insisted be provided even while her heart clenched and ran cold given that look on her father-in-law's face. It wasn't long before her full attention was drawn back to her husband who was starting to mumble and stir in his usual fashion. Kenzie had assured her that the anesthesia used had been light and not to expect too much trouble while he was coming out of it, but well, this was Jamie Reagan and one never knew how that would go. Indeed this time would be no different as it took him a few moments to shrug off the mixed up effects of the drugs.

"S'not right," he was muttering to himself. "You can't… please not Maggie… it's… Joe, you know s'really Magenta, right?… that's just so... silly… Magenta Reagan… who does that? Name's their kid after a color of the sky when they got knocked up anyway… and she wants you to be a smoke eater? Pop will disown us..."

"Hey, c'mon, lambchop, it can't be as bad as _that…_ wake up now," she tried gently to rouse him again as she took in his other injuries, which aside from his re-bandaged leg with a sickening looking tube attached only comprised of some small obvious cuts, bruises and brush burns, all of which had already been tended to with a few steri-stripped sections on his arms and brow being the worst where he had been cut by the sharp thorns of briar bushes. The super duper, blood soaked nearly shredded primaloft jacket in his personal effects bag, however, had obviously taken the brunt of that and unlike her husband would not live to see another day.

"I don't know what your brother has to do with this, but if you want to argue about baby names, I'm all for it. I just need you front and center first though or it's no fun because you won't remember what we said… and for the record I would never agree to name my daughter Magenta, besides the Northern lights were green when we made our munchie in Iceland, so it would be more like Emerald Reagan… which is actually kinda pretty, and sounds Irish too I think, hmm. Maybe one for our list?"

"No, our Joey wants to marry 'er, Ed… Addie's daughter… can't let 'im… you'll twitch y'er nose right off…"

"Wow, now that's interesting," Eddie played along with a smile on her face at the improbable thought. "So our nonexistent Joey and Addison Greene's what, future baby Magenta as a couple? Kenzie must have given you more of the good stuff than she thought if you're worried about that because I promise you that hell would freeze over solid first before I'd let that happen."

"Ed, you're here," Jamie sighed with relief when his wits returned a few moments later even while his eyes remained closed after some more mumblings about sunsets and the consequences of not being prepared as his mind had woven an interesting dream together regarding their present circumstances and the future combined with Addie and George's bouncing announcement.

"Of course I am… I love you, so where else would I be?" Eddie assured with soft touches and a kiss, trying to sooth his passage back which appeared to be a little jumpy and disjointed as he juggled an array of events and emotions at the same time.

"And my leg, it's...?" he fretted after reaching down towards his knee which certainly felt like it might likewise be missing with a femoral block ceasing the pain that had triggered his brain for the last however many hours.

"Shhhh… you're all right… it's still there, they just numbed it up for now."

"Wait, the baby?" he asked before simultaneously absorbing that and changing his focus as his eyes finally opened and he realized she was laying there next to him in a hospital gown herself. "Is he...?"

"He? Nuh-uh, he's still a she, lambchop, and you're just a little messed up right now," she assumed he just needed to awaken more fully. "Feel this… See how strong that is? You don't have to worry, okay? She's right here too… and so are you… all of you," Eddie smiled as she stopped his hand and instantly grounded him by placing it on her now bouncing belly as the baby was being active once more. "Doc Kenzie said the pain in your leg was from a hematoma that built up from hitting the side of it on something, maybe even during the car accident. The bone was so strong it held instead of breaking again when you fell and she was able to fix everything else so that it will heal really soon… worst case you might have to stay off of it again for a couple months because there could be a hairline fracture down by the screws, but that's it and she'll check in a few days to be sure."

"S'good then, right?" he replied sleepily as the overall ramifications of all that news were really still beyond him at this point. "M'mean we're all good… sweetness s'okay too…?"

"Yes, I promise; Kaylin's sleeping with mom right in the next room. Danny's already woken up and your dad was talking to him. Kenzie even looked at your graft while she was in there. She said everything was fantastic... Jamie, it's healing better than she even imagined it could; the matrix worked… so many more people are going to be helped..." she paused to give him a chance to absorb that before revealing a few other facts that had come to light. "It was worth everything you did."

"So Dad knows what happened and everything's okay then," he relaxed back for just a second before his wife continued and burst his little bubble of serenity once more. Little did either of them realize at this point that it would be the last moment of peace they would experience for months to come courtesy of another major blow was about to hit as Mason Malevsky was not quite done torturing the Reagan family just yet, and he would continue to haunt them from beyond.

"Kenzie thanked me for everything you did for her… For pushing through the hearing so she could keep her license. Jamie, I know about Washington…"

"Oh, Ed... crap… I'm so sorry," he started to tense again as he looked up, having momentarily forgotten about that major wrinkle with everything else that had gone on. "I did that without talking to you first… I swear I was gonna explain when I got home. I know you love the house, being here in the city and you're so close to that gold badge..."

"But I love you more than all that, and it's okay, do you hear me? If I had to give up every single one those things so that she can help other people like you? Lambchop, then it's not even a close call because none of that matters to me if we're not together and you're healed. I don't want you to worry because I know why you did it and I'm so proud of you. We'll be fine… it'll be a fresh start for both of us. Who knows, maybe I'll just stay home with the kids, have mom move in with us down there and we'll have a half dozen more," she kidded to lighten his mood.

"Now that… might really kill me," he smirked back, fully emerged and grateful for her genuine love and determination… for everything that she had ever meant to him. "Ed… how did you know?" he rasped. "How did you know I was still out there alone when…?" he choked back. "Dad told me everyone else gave up on me."

"Because you weren't out there alone… you were right here," she admitted while tearing up as she moved his hand up over her heart now. "And, Jamie, I don't know how, but I knew you weren't gone…"

" _Eddie, sweetheart… I know… I know how much you're hurting right now," a grief-stricken Frank tried to comfort his distraught daughter-in-law with Henry, Eva, Erin, and Linda looking on, shocked by the news they had just received while she clung to him like a lifeline even as a team of doctors and nurses were moving to work on her since it was obvious she was feeling intermittent strong contractions now after being told that Jamie's lifeless and charred body remained at the scene of the accident… that her husband would never come home or hold her or his daughters again. "We all love him, but you have to let them help you… we have to do everything for this baby right now… we need to focus on that. It's what Jamie would want."_

" _No! I… I can't do this without him!" Eddie cried as the pain hit again and she nearly doubled over before he caught her. "I won't!"_

" _Edit, kislányom… please listen to him," Eva begged as she stepped forward and griped her daughter's hand. "A te babád must come first over anything… even Jamison. You must tell yourself only that… you cannot help him now…"_

" _No! He's not! Please, Anya… please, please tell me he's not!" she sobbed even as more hands were surrounding and forcing her into a bed before stripping her down, applying leads and inserting an IV with urgency. "It's a mistake! That's all I want to hear!"_

" _I cannot, my baby… I cannot lie because it is what you want, but I am with you now and he is here in you… in your child. You will know when you see her and never be alone… I promise, lány, but you must take care of her first… she needs her anya to be brave right now."_

" _And I need Jamie! Please Frank, you can't leave him out there! He can't be alone!"_

" _Eddie, we were advised…" he paused while trying to form the words that did not want to come. "The Sergeant that spoke to me said it would be better if we didn't see him like that," he grimaced at the thought of the gruesome description of the burned body next to the Jeep that had been provided. "I'm so sorry, sweetheart. There's someone there with him; he's not alone. They're just waiting for the ME to come and then they'll bring him here as soon as the scene is cleared. Right now I can't help Jamie," he choked at the thought as even Henry was forced to turn and walk away, a sleeping Kaylin clutched at his shoulder. "But I can be here for you and his baby and Danny… this will… when he comes out of surgery... I have to be with him too," he admitted with a sad look at Erin who was crying uncontrollably for both her lost brothers with her head on Linda's shoulder now._

" _Eddie, we'll all be here for both of you, and Kaylin," her outsider Reagan soul sister promised as she clutched the bag of Danny's personal effects someone had handed to her after informing them upon their arrival that he had been taken into emergency surgery to repair a broken arm and the damage to his nicked brachial artery which had seen him nearly bleed out before the medics responding to his 911 call had retrieved him and rushed back to the trauma center here via a medivac helicopter._

" _No! This is wrong! YOU'RE ALL WRONG!" Eddie cried again as she clutched her phone and hit the number for her husband's speed dial, still in apparent flat denial. "He's not dead! I would know! I would just know… and I don't feel THAT!" she railed back from amid the doctor and two nurses still actively trying to console and settle her._

" _Commissioner," the OB resident added with a pleading look. "We must calm her down one way or another, I can't even get a reading on the fetal heart rate this way… this baby could be in distress, and at 26 weeks…"_

" _Sweetheart, the Sergeant said that Danny told them himself when he called that his brother was hurt in the accident. It was just too late for him when they got there. Please… please, Eddie, let them help you," he begged, failing to provide any comfort and feeling completely helpless now._

" _NO! YOU'LL SEE!" she insisted as she held the phone up to her ear and prayed with every fiber in her being that a miracle would occur… that her husband would just pick up the line as if nothing had happened and reassure her that all would be right with the world again. Instead, the unthinkable happened…_

 _...the phone in Danny's bag rang on cue._

" _Hi, you've reached Jamie Reagan. Leave a message and I'll get back to you…"_

"Oh, Ed… I'm so sorry you had to go through that," Jamie sighed with heavy regret as he wrapped his arm around her once she had snuggled as close as possible to his side, their little munchie now protectively cradled between them. "But how did hearing my phone in there help you figure it out?"

"Because of what your Dad said when he was trying to explain what happened…" her voice broke. "He said that they ID'd Danny by his badge and his call to 911… but Jamie, he had your phone. His caller ID couldn't have shown up at the emergency center. Everyone tried to tell me it was a mistake… that the report we got was wrong or the medics probably just picked up yours by accident and that his was still lying there wherever they found him, but I just knew… I just knew that you were the one calling for help and I made them check for sure. Why did you have it?"

"His phone? I mixed them up in the beginning somehow. I guess I had them both in my pocket and didn't realize that I left mine with him until I got up to the top of the ridge," he recalled. "I tried 911 when I had one bar of service and I barely got through before the line went dead… I turned to call again, but that's when my foot slipped, I dropped the phone and I fell down against a tree and got stuck there without it. I thought that's where they were going to find me," he shuddered. "But if I had stayed there, it would have been too late, so when the sirens came back I tried sliding to the bottom of the hill instead. Sorry, I really wrecked the jacket you got me," he quipped to lighten the heavy mood of the moment as they both considered that. "But it sure helped keep me warm, because I…"

"Hate the cold… like I'd care about a stupid coat, Harvard," she finished for him and chided before continuing. "There was so much static on the 911 recording no one could tell if it was you or Danny, so I tried his number and when TARU pinged his phone back to the scene… your dad and Rick agreed to go themselves and see… I told them I wouldn't let the doctors help me here if they didn't, and I was pretty hysterical so I think it really scared them not to," she admitted shamefully.

"Damn, woman… you drive a hard bargain," Jamie shook his head. "But that was wrong, Ed… I would never want you to put yourself or the baby at risk for me."

"I know," Eddie confessed in a small voice as she caressed her belly and gave thanks once more that it had worked out for the good. "I couldn't think straight. Somehow I just knew in my heart you were out there and needed help… I swear I could hear you talking to me. Once they left… Mom, Erin and Linda were able to calm me down and get me to focus on taking care of her instead… the contractions were from the stress," she assured. "It wasn't real labor, but it sure felt like it. If that's a preview of what's to come… I'm getting a little scared now."

"Ed, you're so strong… you'll be okay, we both will and I'll be right there with you every minute… I _was_ calling for you," Jamie admitted as he gave thanks once more for their connection. "I fought all night because all I could think of was coming home to you and the girls… nothing else mattered, not the leg… I could live without that," he declared. "But never without you. When you dialed Danny's phone, I couldn't reach it, but I saw who it was and somehow I knew you had heard me… I was almost gone by then… it was getting so cold and my leg hurt so bad I thought about quitting, but you made me fight and Rigs and Quincy gave me the tools to do it. I wouldn't have made it otherwise."

"Then I'm gonna have to call them both later and thank them for being hardasses towards you all those months," Eddie declared before dialing that back a little with concern. "Quincy's over all the time so I know he's doing great, but how is Rigs? You haven't said lately since he moved upstate to that clinical trial center."

"Rick said tonight when we were waiting for the chopper that he's holding his own… the cancer's still there, but that immunotherapy has helped shrink some of the mets and there aren't any new ones," he was encouraged. "Kenzie thinks maybe he might just beat it," he even added optimistically.

"Oh, Jamie! That's wonderful!" Eddie sighed with a satisfied chuff and a hug as she revelled in his touch, savoring their renewed closeness which was about to be severed once more in an unkind fashion by a vengeful father whose last acts on earth would set the stage for more grief and angst among all the members of the Reagan family from young to old over the next few months.

"Jamie," Frank's cold and strained voice surprised them both from the doorway as they looked up in unison and met his worried eyes. "Son, this is Lieutenant Carmichael of the NYS," he introduced the stern-looking, crisply uniformed officer next to him. "He's here to advise you of your rights. Don't say another word until your lawyer gets here."

"He's what?" Eddie gasped as she sat up nearly dumbstruck at this turn of events. "Is this some kind of joke?! You can't be serious!"

"Jamison Henry Reagan, you are under arrest for the murders of Mason and Matthew Malevsky. You have the right to remain silent…"

* * *

 _Yikes! I bet not too many of you saw that coming, right? Poor guy can't catch a break. It seems that Mason has taken his dirty bag of tricks right to the end in this one and may just have the last laugh after all as our hero is forced to match legal wits with a ghost while his future plans are all turned upside down. Lots of foreshadowing in this one for upcoming events as this installment starts to wrap up for a finale in 10 chapters as well as for the continuing narrative "Where the Heart Lies" which will begin immediately afterwards and cover the aftermath of this as well as Henry and Betty's love story in addition to Frank and Mary's early years together. Whew!_

 _Next we'll find out just what all this legal hoopla is about and whether Jamie will be forced to take it on himself or if he will have his brother's help in clearing his name._


	99. Chapter 99

Chapter 99

"I can't believe this is happening! Please make them stop! They're going to hurt him! Frank you have to do something!" Eddie railed back after watching in disbelief from across the hall in a wheelchair while her husband was moved and sequestered in an isolated room at the end of the ward, unceremoniously handcuffed to the bed and placed under a double guard with no visitors allowed. "He just woke up after surgery! I need to be with him! This isn't right!"

"Francis! What in the holy hell is going on now?!" Henry joined in the extended Reagan family chorus of disbelief at the proceedings which now included a stunned DCPI Garrett Moore who had just arrived after being summoned by Detective Baker.

"Has he been charged?" Erin kicked immediately into district attorney mode. "When is he being arraigned?"

"What about Danny?" Linda worried as no such attempt had been made thus far to detain her own husband. "That's not going to happen to him too, is it?" she asked, concerned over his obviously fragile state, especially since to this point he had only been willing to speak to Rick who now also joined them in the hallway after hearing the commotion. "He's already upset!"

"Wait, so Dad's in trouble like Uncle Jamie?" Jack chimed in. "What did they do?"

"In here," Frank waived his agitated and vocal pack inside a nearby conference area and waited for the door to be closed before even attempting to address this unthinkable turn of events. "Eva," he started softly. "Perhaps it would be best if Kaylin sits in the hallway while we're talking. Would you mind?"

"Sean," Linda asked instead, eager to get her own son out of the discussion as well. "Eddie needs her mom in here. Please, honey… would you watch her? Just stay in the chairs over there where we can see you from the window."

"Okay," he sighed at the familiar request whenever there was adult talk. "I guess Jack gets to stay because he's going to college soon. C'mon, Kay," he added as he picked up the little girl who had been shielded from the majority of what was going on to this point by a protective Nagyanya. "That's what we get for being the youngest. Someday you'll have to do this for your own baby sister and _I'll_ get to hear what's going on," he resigned as they left the room.

"Now out with it, Francis!" Henry growled again as soon as the coast was clear. "Where is this Malevsky and what's he pulling now?"

"He's dead... probably already in the morgue downstairs by now, Pop."

"GOOD! THAN WHY THE HELL AREN'T WE ALL CELEBRATING?!" their irate patriarch roared back without a hint of sympathy.

"Because Jamie _allegedly_ put him there," Frank answered sadly with a politically correct emphasis as he considered the chain of events that was likely to follow now since that accusation had been made. "And no, at this point Danny has not been charged with anything as far as I know, although that might change."

"Sajnálom, I'm not following this," Eva admitted as she looked nervously at her daughter who had gone quiet and wide-eyed as the seriousness of the situation was beginning to sink in. "That man, he tried to harm Jamison and Daniel, yes? Is that not what is called self-defense?"

"Unfortunately it's more complicated than that," the tired and heartbroken Commissioner revealed.

"Dad, I think you need to start at the beginning," Erin advised as she too felt nervous butterflies growing in her stomach given her father's utterly defeated look. "What _do_ you know?"

"Last night about the same time Jamie's 911 call came in," Frank started carefully. "A resident in the area found a man bleeding and hunched over the wheel of a car stopped in the middle of an intersection about two miles from the original scene."

"Malevsky," Henry nearly spat out the assumption with liquid venom to move things along.

"Right. Since it's a rural area, this good samaritan thought he was better off pulling him into the backseat of his own car and driving him to the small, local community hospital rather than calling for help because he didn't have a phone on him. Once they figured out he was shot they transferred him here."

"Shot? You've got to be kidding me," Rick gritted as he filled in a blank and thought about how close they had been to this madman who had been transfixed on harming the Reagan family for months now. "The GSW that was coming out of the OR when we first brought Jamie in," he surmised.

"Yes," Frank admitted. "And with limited resources, it took a while for the police in the area to catch up with everything going on, especially since they were already involved with Danny's rescue and the body at the car."

"So he was shot there?" Erin puzzled. "Did Jamie or Danny say what happened yet?"

"Not Danny," Linda and Rick chimed in unison before he continued.

"Once he gets to the point where Malevsky came back with the car he, uh… he's either blocking it out or he honestly doesn't remember," Rick revealed while shaking his head. "It could be from the concussion or shock… he lost a lot of blood," he added without much conviction, firmly believing that there was a third more viable reason for Danny's adamant refusal to talk about what had happened next, but given his suspicion that it was deeply rooted in PTSD his instincts were telling him that confronting the older Reagan brother about that and pressuring him was absolutely the wrong thing to do at this point.

"You believe that?" Henry challenged a little more sharply, only to be answered by an unconvincing shrug of Rick's shoulders. "BECAUSE I DON'T!" he yelled as he got to his feet again in frustration, ready to go confront his oldest grandson. "His brother's in serious trouble after nearly killing himself trying to save him! It's time someone knocks some sense into that boy and tells him that!"

"I have to believe him," the retired Marine answered. "Henry, please… I know you mean well, but if he's not ready to talk then confronting him in a combative state before he's ready… you're looking at a major flight or fight reaction, and that can get scary for everyone involved. Jamie's not the only one at risk here," he advised.

"Rick, what are you saying?!" Linda demanded as the fear for her husband balled up in her throat.

"I'm saying I've seen this before and that Danny needs to get help here from someone who knows a hell of a lot more than I do. I'm saying he can't be pushed into it."

"Well, he doesn't have to talk about anything right away, does he?" Erin interjected. "We can just ask Jamie what happened now that he's awake."

"Except that we can't!" Henry argued with a nod back in the direction of his youngest grandson's holding cell for lack of a better term. "Didn't you hear that officer? No visitors except for his lawyer until he's arraigned, and just who the hell is that going to be?!" he huffed with an exasperated look at his son. "Eh, for crying out loud as if I didn't know! THE SLIMEBALL! Just what we need on top of all of this!"

"If you need to hire a shark, make sure you get the Great White," Frank quoted his own father's words from a time before when Danny had needed such help after being framed with cocaine in his trunk. With deep regret, he had already swallowed a virtual mountain of pride and made the call to his former and still-despised son-in-law. "Jack's on his way."

"So, it's that serious?" Erin sighed, knowing how much hate there was in the family for her former but top shelf criminal defense attorney husband, and if her father was willing to bring him in this quickly… that could only mean things were looking bad on every front.

"Yes," Frank admitted and confirmed her fears. "After surgery, the doctors were able to wake Mason up despite his injuries to ask if he wanted extraordinary measures taken," he paused before revealing a final insidious twist in their lives delivered by a vengeful genius whose last acts on this earth had been to inflict as much pain and discord on their family as possible and would succeed in disrupting their lives and turning one brother against the other.

"He'd been shot in the abdomen and the bullet did a lot of damage to multiple organs," he continued. "They couldn't save him, only prolong things a little while to buy him some time and he knew it. So he said no and then asked for me and an officer to come instead… I've never seen such hate in any one person's eyes," he recalled those familiar icy grey beacons as he closed his own and shook his head while his blood ran cold at the sharp memory.

"Dad, what did he say to you?" Erin asked, desperate for the answer but dreading it now given the effect it had already.

"He made a dying declaration in front of all of us that Jamie and Danny had deliberately tracked him and his son down while they were in the Chevelle… that they were looking for vengeance because of what Sonny had done to Joe and the fact he had restored the car for spite. Claimed that Jamie had recognized him when he lived on their street and he was in fear for his life so he moved. He said that he and Matthew were threatened and were just trying to get away before Danny lost control of the Jeep and had the accident. When they went back as, and I quote 'good citizens' to see what happened, Jamie lured Matthew next to the car under the premise of needing help to get Danny out, killed him and then fired at Mason once and hit him from further away when he got out of the Chevelle to help his son. Said he managed to get back in the driver's seat just before there was an explosion and didn't remember what happened after that. Pretty soon after his statement he went into cardiac arrest and died," he reported with no apparent relief at that admission.

"WHAT A CROCK OF COMPLETE AND UTTER BULL HOCKEY!" Henry shouted angrily. "None of that makes any sense! Jamie would have never asked for their help! I hope the damn bastard rots in hell and suffered until the very end on his way there!" he added uncharitably.

"But that can't be… Jamie didn't have a gun," Eddie finally offered an insight in a broken voice as in her shock she had taken a backseat during the contentious family discussion until now. "He left his at home because he couldn't carry in DC!"

"And Danny's was still holstered when they brought it in with him," Henry quickly pointed out. "I saw it in their custody. Have them test it! That'll show it wasn't fired recently!"

"There was another weapon recovered at the scene," Frank admitted as the information from this rural police department had been initially loose and easy to come by for his sharp and dedicated assistant who had moved quickly before a young prosecutor with aspiring political aspirations had stepped in and shut off the valve. "The registration traced back to Jamie," he added tightly. "It's his duty weapon he claimed was lost to IAB back when he was a rookie and when they test the slug that was pulled out of Malevsky… Pop, you know they're going to find a match."

"SON OF A BITCH! Wasn't Sonny Malevsky the one that took it in the first place!" his father shouted back in heavy anger and without regard to the company in the room as the rest of the stunned audience looked on.

"Allegedly… no one can prove that and if Danny can't testify to what happened last night, it's on Jamie's word alone," Erin visible paled as all the pieces to this were falling together in a perfect pattern to neatly frame her little brother for two counts of murder in first degree, Class A felonies carrying the maximum possible sentences in the state of New York and she knew it.

"He could get life."

"WAIT!" Eddie cried as she was ready to cling to anything. "Malevsky's statement… isn't that hearsay? It can't be used against him, right? Because Jamie can't confront his accuser! Erin?" she begged looking for a legal loophole for the noose that was apparently tightening around her husband's neck by the second.

"Dying declarations are admitted as an exception to the hearsay rule when they are made by declarants who are dead at the time of trial and who, at the time they made the declaration, believed that their death was near and certain," her shaken sister-in-law recited verbatim in monotone. "In New York State: the declarant must be unavailable to testify because he died due to the action, and the prosecution must be for a homicide case. It must also appear that the declarant, if living, would have been competent to testify… and Mason knew that didn't he?" she asked as her father nodded.

"Obviously…" he sighed.

"Oh God!" she followed it through even further. "Dad, you'll have to take the stand and testify to what he said… It'll look like you're siding against Jamie! Everything we've done… having Jackie work outside of the department, we were all searching for him off the record for months! The whole family was! It was never an official investigation, and that's going to make him look even more guilty because we still have nothing to tie Malevsky back to targeting us! Everything is circumstantial!"

"But Grandpa, now that you have the car, can't you prove he hit Uncle Jamie with it in the first place?" Jack reasoned a bit naively as he thought about some of his favorite forensics shows and tried to fit into his first serious, adult family discussion. "Won't that show he was defending himself?"

"That doesn't matter Jack, even if we had that evidence. The threat must be imminent in order to use deadly force. Mason claimed they were trying to help. Besides Jamie said the Chevelle was already repaired when I talked to him," Frank admitted. "And meticulously cleaned one would assume given the lengths Malevsky was willing to take this… other than the fact that he and his son died, he couldn't have planned it more perfectly."

"What's going to happen now?… Please tell me! I… I can't think straight!" Eddie cried with tears welling over her eyes as she looked around the room and begged for someone, anyone to give her an answer other than what was clearly becoming obvious, that Jamie was in serious, life-altering trouble.

"They've arrested him, so now they have to arraign him so he can hear the official charges," Erin answered curtly as she was more interested in moving forward than rehashing what to her should already be evident given everyone's occupations. "Usually it's within twenty-four hours, but here in the hospital it could take longer to arrange to do it over video and it's the weekend. C'mon, Eddie, you know this," she tutted given her sister-in-law's own occupation. "He'll plead not guilty, right?" she challenged with a direct look at her father. "Then there's the preliminary hearing to determine whether there is sufficient evidence to prosecute. If that evidence exists, it's a felony so the case will be bound over for grand jury review. If they indict… he'll go to trial," she finished sadly before revealing another aspect with a pointed look at her Eddie's very pregnant belly. "This whole process… we all know how drawn out it can be… it could be months, even years before it's over."

"But our baby is coming in _June_ , and that's just fourteen weeks from now!" Eddie reminded as if that was necessary with a stricken look down the hall towards Jamie's room. "He could _miss_ it? Miss seeing her be born? He'll lose his job offer with the FBI, won't he? They could keep him in jail without bail on murder charges, can't they? It's not fair! That can't happen! Malevsky is the one that trapped them! Jamie has to see his baby come into this world and he needs his rehab and Kenzie's help! He won't ever walk again without it!"

"Okay, we all need to calm down. Let's just jump one hurdle at a time," Frank tried to reassure his shaken audience. "This isn't over or precluded by a longshot. First, if they go forward with this we need to get him arraigned and then out on bail, I don't care if it takes putting up both our houses to do it, and then we'll take it from there. Garret, I need you to get me everything you have on the District Attorney from that county… he's the one driving this at speed, and from what I know he's a young bull with political stars in his eyes."

"Nathaniel Pierce, I've heard of him. He's a real celebrity hound in a no-nothing little backward county, and this is exactly the kind of case he's not going to let go of," Erin warned. "The publicity will make his career."

"Frank, no matter what I do this is going to blow up in the press like a wildfire," his DCPI counseled grimly. "I won't be able to control it. Even if he's completely exonerated, Jamie's name is going to be forever tainted by this… all of yours will be. It won't be just his job on the line or his future with the FBI."

"Do your best, we'll just have to worry about that later," the Commissioner advised as he had far more to concern himself with than the court of public opinion at this moment. "That's what we're all going to need to do… our very best. Jamie risked everything without another thought for Danny… he was ready to give life and limb to make sure his brother was safe, now we're all going to have to be willing to do that for him. Malevsky is not going to win this battle," he vowed while still shocked at how close this had already brought them to Mason's ultimate goal of stripping him of his remaining sons. "I'm not losing either of my boys no matter what it takes from each of us!"

* * *

 _First, as this installment is beginning to wind down and our chapter count is about to hit the triple digits (yikes, I hope to_ _never_ _say that again!), I have to give a shout out to some of my little BB think tank members jlmayer, Laura Louisa Lewis, lawslave and BlueBlood82 for all their help on this epically long journey… it's great to have such a group to bounce ideas off, and their individual insights are an enormous help in constructing a story like this._

 _Also special thanks to all the readers who stuck with this for so long if you're still out there! I never thought it would take this long, but writing this kept me going through a tough, long year. Sometimes it's no fun being an adult._

 _Next up, our reluctant jailbird deals with some of the ramifications of his unexpected brush with the law, and we finally find out what took place in those last minutes at the bridge when Jamie recounts the event to his own dedicated focus group in hopes that someone else might have an idea on how to get him out of this mess since he's not getting any help from one source in particular._


	100. Chapter 100

Chapter 100

"Mommy, LOOK! He's 'ere! He's 'ere! Daddy's home 'gain!" a very excited Kaylin Reagan shouted after watching for their arrival and bouncing up and down before running to the patio door as Jamie was once again delivered back into the kitchen of their house in Bay Ridge under the veil of darkness while hidden underneath a hoodie before being whisked up the side ramp in a much-hated wheelchair so they could move quickly and avoid the limelight.

"DADDY!" she cried again and jumped immediately into his lap as soon as the small procession of men and one additional woman were inside, long gone were the days where the little girl was made nervous or skittish by such very ordinary things to her now as braces, prosthetics and the like. Indeed, it had been the friendly and relatable young man now known as Uncle Quincy who had managed to break through some of her sensitive barriers with his easy personality and a few fun challenges during those early visits which had since seen many cookies and cupcakes baked and shared after games of wheelchair soccer, basketball, and even hide and seek had taken place between them.

Today though, instead of the normal joy and laughter she was met with whenever she greeted her father like that upon his return home there was only a forced smile and marked sadness on his somewhat scruffy and unshaven face.

"Daddy, your cheeks are itchy," she observed his several days' worth of stubble with a frown as she rubbed both of them with her hands. "You should make 'em nice."

"I know, baby," he answered before giving her a lingering kiss on the forehead and a tight hug while ducking Eddie's eager eyes with a guilt-ridden look as her happiness at having her husband return home after three days of no contact since he had been taken into custody was instantly tempered. "Daddy was busy while he was away. How about you help me with that? Can you run to the bathroom and get my shaving cream out of the basket in the closet? I'll let you squirt it on, okay? Just wait for me and I'll be there in a few minutes"

"'Kay, Daddy!" she enthused and immediately backed down off his lap and skipped across the floor, eager to have him back the way he belonged as his plan worked and his sensitive daughter was occupied before she could pick up on the emotions running between her parents. As soon as she left, Eddie approached finally to embrace him as the tears fell for both while Eva, Erin, Frank, Henry and their newfound reluctant ally Jack Boyle thoughtfully retreated to the living room to sit down and give the couple some privacy.

"Are you alright?" she whispered as she leaned over to hug him while he covered his eyes with one hand and shook his head as she could feel him begin to tremble.

"God, Ed, this is so messed _up,"_ he rasped back harshly and angrily pushed down the hem of the sweatpants on his "good" left leg so that it covered the bulky and obvious GPS house arrest ankle bracelet monitor that had been secured there that afternoon before his release from the hospital. A contentious bedside arraignment earlier in the morning after almost three days of waiting in isolation had finally succeeded in winning his release at discharge albeit with a substantial bond required for security over the objections of the eager young prosecutor looking for remand and to use this case as a springboard up the political food chain. Only after being reminded of the fact that Jamie would likely be a high-profile target in jail and was not much of a flight risk presently, still requiring intensive rehab for his injury at what would be an exorbitant cost for the small rural county had the judge seen fit to allow for strict house arrest with the only exceptions being his regular PT and doctor's appointments. "Pop had to put up the house… _our_ house to get me out."

"I know, lambchop… that's the last thing I'm worried about," she assured and rubbed small circles on his back while he let some of the cramped up emotions out before they could be seen by anyone else, especially his daughter. "You're home with us, that's all that matters."

"But I can't leave for anything else… not even to go to the baby appointments," he fretted over the added stress this had all caused his wife over the recent days. "If you have her before it all gets sorted, or he revokes my bond for any reason after the preliminary hearing, I won't be able to be there!"

"Hey, that's months from now, okay?" she tried to soothe him even though that was one of her greatest fears. "Besides, I could always opt for a home birth up in the tub," she kidded trying to break the tension a little. "Then you could witness everything in living color. We could invite the whole family."

"Oh God," he shuddered at the thought of _that_ sparked his OCD need for a complete scrub down of said room even as the image finally managed to crack a little smile on his face.

"You'd do that for me?"

"Oh hell no, not a chance," she smirked. "This baby's being born in the hospital with Dr. Geisner where she's two steps away from the NICU and they keep a boatload of drugs for me. And besides, we won't have to… we'll get this all cleared up by then," she attempted to sound confident despite the growing mountain of evidence already apparent.

"I'm not so sure, Ed," he admitted sadly. "I've been over it a thousand times already in my head… there's enough against me in what Mason said to go to trial, and the grand jury will indict a ham sandwich, especially one with my name… I've seen it happen… we've _both_ seen it happen so we've got to be prepared for that and everything else that's coming…"

"For what?" Eddie replied back a little sharper now as she felt him shake. "Jamie, you _are_ innocent… you were defending yourself and Danny _._ You know that; I know that… your whole family knows that and we're going to prove it beyond a shadow of a doubt, okay? We have to believe everything's going to be okay… until it's not, remember? Don't do this to yourself," she worried. "This is not all on you."

"Yes it is!" he hissed back. "Everything's on me, and it's on my little girl, who's going to hate me forever for wrecking her life, just like…"

"Like I did with my dad?" Eddie finished while shaking her head. "No, Jamie… he was guilty and hurt innocent people on purpose. Huge difference."

"Is it?" he wondered as he could hear Kaylin impatiently calling for him from the bathroom. "How about when I'm not here when she needs me or what I'm accused of follows her around forever? When the kids at school ask her about her dad being in prison? Do you think if she says I'm innocent that's going to mean one damn thing? You can hardly speak to your father even now when he's so close to getting out, and he's made some amends for what he did. She's already lost her two birth parents to the system. Do you think it will matter in the long run when this baby doesn't know her daddy?... I just… I just need to get cleaned up; Kaylin shouldn't have to see me like this already," he suddenly sought to end their conversation for now and run and hide in a bit of normalcy, even if it was just for a few minutes after having everything stripped from him. "Wasn't allowed near any sharps in there," he added flatly as he rubbed his bristly cheek. "Too much of a risk."

"Jamie…"

"Can you get my crutches, please?" he pointed to his replacement set leaning in the corner that had been brought with them from the hospital… a regular aluminum, run-of-the-mill pair that was not nearly as nice and comfortable as the fancy ergonomic ones that had been lost in the backseat of the Jeep during the fire—time to make due with less, for now, he had resigned.

"Wait, you're not supposed to use them yet, anyway, are you?" she puzzled. "Dr. Kenzie said no weight-bearing for at least six more weeks… you have hairline fractures around the pins in your femur. Jamie, don't do this," she insisted. "It's not worth the chance of the whole thing failing when you're so close."

"I have to get up, please, Ed," he begged, breathing faster now that the overwhelming anxiety of feeling trapped was overtaking every other sense. "I was handcuffed to that bed for the last three days and I thought I was heading for a cell at county lockup tonight. I _need_ to be able to get up," he reiterated as he adjusted and tightened the temporary stabilizer applied to his leg before Aaron could fabricate and deliver another implement of unholy torture adjustable brace. "I'll be careful, but I can't stay in this chair or in that bed no matter what anyone says… not while I'm confined here in this house too… there has to be _something_ I can do or I swear I'm not gonna make it."

"Okay, okay," she relented while reaching over against her better judgment and handing them to him. "Just please don't hurt yourself," she begged before watching as he got up and slowly made his way through the living room and into the hall bath where he was met with a chorus of giggles as Kaylin had given herself her very own sudsy matching mustache and goatee while waiting.

"He's… he just needs a few minutes with her," she reported sadly with a sniff as Eva gave a disapproving look while her daughter wiped her eyes as Frank stood up immediately to offer her a reassuring hug before carefully helping her and her pregnant belly onto a comfortable spot on the couch where she could put her legs up to rest and wait. "So, what else happened this afternoon?" she questioned, having been asked to stay at home while the legal formalities had been worked out. As has been his habit lately, Bear jumped up from the floor and curled up protectively next to her. "He won't say, but he's already talking about being prepared and Kaylin growing up without him so something else is going on that he didn't want me to worry about… I know it. Spill."

"There was a complaint filed with the state Supreme Court's Grievance Committee this morning," Erin answered tightly in a low voice. "Nathaniel Pierce, the local prosecutor on the case… he's pulling out all the stops. An attorney's license to practice law is suspended upon conviction of a crime," she explained. "But it can also be pulled by the State Bar for the commission of a 'criminal act that reflects adversely on the lawyer's honesty, trustworthiness or fitness as a lawyer in other respects.' With these charges… if the committee decides that Jamie poses a danger to the public, they can recommend suspension pending further disciplinary proceedings such as disbarment… and they did right away."

"So, he already lost it?" Eddie gasped. "That means…"

"Until this is resolved in his favor, he can't practice law… anywhere, and that includes the corporate work he was doing for Spencer's company. They took away his only viable source of income for however long this goes on," Erin revealed.

"Plus he had to disclose the charges to the FBI," Frank reported. "Even being accused impacts his ability to get a federal security clearance. They rescinded their offer for the Legal Attaché program an hour ago," he added with mixed emotions as the only bright spot in this was the fact that his family would be staying close, at least for now. "The two of you won't be going to Washington."

"Sweetheart, you don't have to worry about the house or anything else," Henry tried to make some small assurance to counteract another blow to the young couple on the financial front. "I hold the note and I'll give you my last dime to make sure he beats this thing," he added with a contentious look over at Jack Boyle, visibly daring him to make a mention of his usually exorbitant fee.

"Of course I'll be doing this pro bono," Jack coughed out under everyone's direct gaze. "Family discount, less the expenses," he smiled with a peevish look at Erin. "I always liked Jamie. Even during the darkest days of our marriage, he was willing to look at both sides, unlike _some_ people I could name," he dripped with a deliberate nod towards the other two men in the room.

"Let's move on then," Frank gruffed as he sought to distance himself from this topic before he lost his temper and said something to change Boyle's mind. Like it or not, he was a much-needed resource right now.

"Wait, where's Danny?" Eddie asked in a flat voice. Despite this all-around, albeit strained truce that seemed to be in place at the moment with everyone else, she couldn't help but notice one obvious and usually very vocal absence in this hastily planned family brainstorming session, and as much as she tried to empathised with the trauma he had endured, right now she was a hundred percent team Jamie and as far as she could see he was receiving zero support from his older brother at the moment. "I thought we were all supposed to go over everything that happened at the bridge so we could figure out a way to stop this!" she snapped. "He was there! We need to know what he saw!"

"He was discharged this morning and Linda took him home," Erin reported. "Eddie, he's getting counseling from a very good PTSD therapist that Rick recommended. He's already had two sessions… it's all he can do right now."

"Really? _All_ he can do? Well, from what I see, Jamie's the one that sacrificed everything and now because of that he's having it _all_ taken away… his freedom, his job and his family!" his wife defended. "Listen, I don't want to see anything bad happen to Danny either, and I understand he's going through something hard too, but none of this seems fair and now he's not even here trying to help!"

"Eddie, don't," a deflated voice piped up from behind her as Jamie rejoined them, now clean-shaven with a satisfied little girl accompanying him. "I know they told you about everything else, and I just don't have it in me tonight to deal with it. I'm sure Danny wanted to come," he tried to sound convincing even though he had doubts himself. "But Rick said the shrink thinks I'm some kind of trigger and he shouldn't even see or talk to me until they work this out… so it's… whatever," he shrugged and tried to play it off even though as hard as he struggled to come to grips with what had happened since those moments at the bridge, the fact that his big brother was still missing from his usual protector role here hurt.

"No it's not whatever," she frowned and immediately felt bad about her outburst given the fact that her brother-in-law was facing something serious as well. "You love him and you want to understand this… I do too, and I promise I'll try to be better. It's just that you know when I see you in trouble sometimes my momma bear claws come out."

"And my head knows he's doing the right thing by listening to them and finally getting help for this, and of all people, I should understand considering what I learned with the EDP program, but my heart's just having a hard time accepting everything that happened out there. I guess it's harder to see straight when it's your own family. Let's just get this over with so that everyone else can go home and I can stop thinking about it for a couple of hours, okay? I'm just tired."

"Mom? Would you mind taking Kaylin upstairs for her tubby?" Eddie asked to clear the room for what would be a graphic conversation not appropriate for little ears. "Sweetie, when we're done here you can come back down and cuddle with us for as long as you want tonight, okay?" she promised their daughter after seeing her look of disappointment given the fact that her daddy had just returned home.

"And may we p'ease have some ice cream?" came the familiar plea.

"Of course, I even brought home some of that terrible flavor you and your mother love," Eva smiled knowingly and they waited until she disappeared up the steps with her granddaughter.

"Jamie," Frank started as he sensed his son and daughter-in-law's growing frustration with the situation and sought to nip this brotherly discord in the bud before it could become another casualty of Mason's almost perfectly contrived plan. "This is what Malevsky wanted… to drive us apart, and he focused on your brother to put a wedge between you two, but that's where he will fail… our strength is in the family. Danny will come around," he promised. "Have faith; you know he would do anything for you if he could."

"Would he now?" Jamie shook his head in serious doubt at the moment as the strain of the last few days was becoming evident. "He didn't when I really needed him, Dad… he froze and left it all to me, and right now I feel like my whole life is falling apart and I don't even have a big brother to lean on anymore," he reported sadly while being helped into his seat on the couch next to Eddie so he could sit and hold her hand through this. "They said I'm his trigger, but why? What did I do wrong? I don't even know what caused this except for me getting hit by that car!"

"Don't say that," Erin pleaded as she pulled the coffee table over for him to rest his leg on and fluffed a pillow and put it underneath his knee. "It isn't something you did, and Danny will be there for you again. This was a huge wake-up call for him too… he's finally admitted he needs help and he's going to focus on getting better. We just have to be patient and let him and Linda do what the therapist tells them to. Until then you still have the rest of us in your corner and we're going to get you past this. If there's anyone who can wipe the floor with this stupid little whiny Nathaniel Pierce for sport, it's Jack… as much as I hate to admit that," she added with a frown and nod to her ex-husband. "And he'll enjoy it."

"I will," Jack agreed smugly, as always full of self-confidence. "He's a prepubescent pion and I will crush him, but first I need the ammunition to do it. C'mon, Jamie… you know there's always a way, so let's find it. Every detail is critical," he reminded as he prepared to take notes on his waiting legal pad.

"Son, Danny spelled out everything that happened before Malevsky came back but that's where he stopped," Frank encouraged. "Whatever happened after that is the key. The Chevelle was on the bridge, you smelled gas and were trying to pull your brother out of the car. Now, what came next?"

"He told me to get out," Jamie recalled as his eyes glassed over. "He wanted me to leave, but there was nowhere else to go. I looked up and saw them come back, but it didn't matter though… his coat was caught on stuff and I didn't have time to try to get to his gun… I was scared the car was going to blow any second and I couldn't do anything but try to get him out. He told me…"

* * *

 _Well even though we are coming to the end, this chapter just ran too long for comfort so I split it and will be posting the next part as a **BONUS** tomorrow. Right after that, we will be skipping ahead a few more months to finish things out as Danny finally has a breakthrough with his PTSD while Jamie's fears about all this getting in the way and having to miss his baby's birth are perhaps not unfounded._


	101. Chapter 101

Chapter 101

"He told me to get out," Jamie recalled as his eyes glassed over. "He wanted me to leave, but there was nowhere else to go. I looked up and saw them come back, but it didn't matter though… his coat was caught on stuff and I didn't have time to try to get to his gun… I was scared the car was going to blow any second and I couldn't do anything but try to get him out. He told me…"

* * *

 _I can't! Kid! I'm… OW! DAMN IT! I can't! GET OUT NOW!"_

" _YES YOU CAN, DANNY! JUST TRY!" Jamie screamed just as things went from bad to worse as a pair of headlights swept across the front of the vehicle when a familiar blue car returned and idled in the middle of that lonely one-lane bridge while a dark figure stepped out of the passenger seat clutching a shiny, hard object in his hand._

" _I'M NOT LEAVING YOU!"_

" _KID! LOOK OUT! He's got a piece! Take mine!" Danny yelled and unsuccessfully reached for his own gun once more, hampered by his injuries and the caved in dashboard and steering wheel while it appeared Jamie hadn't even heard him, solely focused on getting his brother out of that Jeep before there was a fiery explosion, and ignoring everything else… even the approach of Matthew Malevsky who under his father's watchful eye was determined to follow Mason's instructions to the tee and finally make up for the error that had started this mess... Frank Reagan was to lose both of his remaining sons tonight, one after the other and it was to be Sonny's brother who would take the revenge._

" _Almost… GOT IT!" Jamie shouted as he strained while reaching through the doorway and felt Danny's body finally shift towards him as he tried to drag him over the passenger seat._

" _C'MON, DAN! You've gotta get out!" he begged before the next unexpected sound reverberated through his body like a shock wave and finally snapped him out of that focused state._

 _BANG!_

 _Jamie instinctively dropped and protectively covered his brother after the bullet purposefully whizzed harmlessly within an inch of the back of his head as a warning, hitting nothing and angling upwards through the night air to a destination unknown while leaving his ears ringing._

" _Leave him, or I'll blow your effing head off right here," came the cold, accompanying voice that broke through anyway as the end of the hot barrel was placed against his skull and a hand grabbed the collar of that insanely expensive coat and pulled him backwards off balance and away towards the front of the car where it was obvious to Danny that he was to have a clear view of what was to come next execution-style as he stared back in horror through the cracked glass of the Jeep's windshield._

" _HEY! NO, STOP!" he rasped against the pain from his ribs and finally untangled himself enough to reach his hand down towards the butt of his gun, a motion that did not go unnoticed._

" _HANDS ON THE DASH WHERE I CAN SEE THEM OR HE GETS IT RIGHT NOW!" Matthew snarled, falling back on his former training as a detective himself as he gave Jamie another shove to press him off balance and easily caused a stumble given the fact that it had been months since the younger Reagan had stood without the support of crutches._

" _You don't have to do this," Jamie desperately tried to stop himself from falling while reasoning with the man standing behind him to turn the tables on Mason as he met Danny's eyes intently across the hood of the car, both knowing that there was only one card left to be played, and given the smell of the overheated engine and the quantity of gas running downhill in a narrow rivulet and forming a puddle on the ground next to his feet the time was nearly up. "Your father… he's crazy. How many innocent people has he killed to play this game? Everyone knows he's behind it, and the whole NYPD will come for you now. You're going to be looking over your shoulder the rest of your life because of it. Turn him in now and you can have it back."_

" _My life? Do you know what it's been like with him since your effing family killed SONNY?" Matthew railed. "He's the only one that ever mattered, anyway… Mom died when I was born so that was my fault too and Pop never gave a shit about me. I don't do this and I won't need to look behind from now on… he'll kill me right here. Why do you think he's standing back there, HUH? I've got a gun on me now too! This is all he's been focused on for SEVEN goddamn years! I'm sick of it! Sick of you and hearing about your father and how everything was his fault and sick of fixing that effing car. I wish I'd run you down and finished it in Washington, but no… we had to play some more and do it like this for Sonny!"_

" _Now," he started as Jamie could feel the hand behind him tighten on the trigger, surely this was it he tried to telegraph to Danny… here it comes, be ready, he implored even as his eyes narrowed when a shockingly blank look was returned and his older sibling seemed to have zoned out. "You first, then the loudmouth, and we're done," Matthew smiled as this hell he had been subjected to was about to come to an end._

" _No… don't," Jamie breathed as his heart was pounding in his chest… now or never. "Please don't hurt my family," he finished the known Reagan family codewords himself since his brother remained unexpectedly silent and then instantly went limp, crashing to the ground on his back and waiting for the sound of Danny returning fire to save him._

 _It never came._

"Wait, so he didn't shoot at Matthew?" Eddie gasped as she held his arm in a vice lock grip and turned to look at her husband who was staring down at the ground blankly and slowly shaking his head no. "You said that to him and he didn't even try to help you?"

"Nope," Jamie replied as he chewed his lip. "Never made a move as far as I could tell, and Matthew, he was so caught off guard I don't think he knew what to do at first either. After a second he… he just pointed the gun down at my chest as I was laying there and went to pull the trigger."

"So _then_ Danny acted, right?" Frank demanded without thinking that statement through given the fact that the gun had remained apparently untouched, and yet his youngest was still present and alive, leaving everyone else in the room somewhat aghast at such a major beak of family protocol and trust… that passphrase had been drilled into each of his children and now grandchildren from the moment they could understand how important it was. The required action should have come on autopilot, especially for Danny given the events he had been through before with Erin and Jack when she was shot and taken hostage at the courthouse in years past.

"No, Dad… he never pulled his piece. C'mon, you already knew that. It stayed in his holster."

"Then how did Matthew end up like he did?" Erin questioned knowing that the autopsy results hadn't been released yet and hoping this was the proof they needed to show that her little brother was not responsible. "He died there where you were standing in front of the car… Dad said so. Jamie, did his own father shoot him in the back like he threatened to?"

"No… I… when I was on the ground I had my hands out by my shoulders… I was just waiting for him to finish me off," Jamie explained as he closed his eyes and relived that moment. "Everything was running through my head on fast forward like they say it does… Eddie, you and the girls… Kaylin getting married without me being there, you having to walk her down the aisle instead," he swallowed hard at the thought. "Some kind of survival instinct kicked in I guess… my right hand brushed the ground and there was a rock or something there. I wasn't even thinking… somehow I got a hold of it and kneecapped him… hard," he admitted while recalling the sickening but familiar sound and feel of crunching bone that still caused him to shudder. "I busted it. He screamed and dropped the gun… I rolled over and kicked it away. Matthew stayed down, so I went for Danny again. He was just sitting there where I left him… staring down at the ground in front of the car with his hands still up on the dash. He never moved."

"He must have been in shock already," Henry tried to look for a plausible explanation for his oldest grandson's puzzling behavior.

"No, Pop… his arm was broken, but he wasn't bleeding then. I grabbed him and while I was pulling him out of the car… that's when Mason shot at us at least once. I didn't know that Danny was hit… I just heard a ricochet and saw sparks fly from the hood and the dead grass ignited near where some of the gas had run… between that and the engine, I thought the car was going to go up any second. Matthew's gun was just laying there on the side of the road where I kicked it so I picked it up and fired once back at Mason for cover while I was dragging Danny to the opposite tree line… I didn't even really aim… I just heard him yell something and then Chevelle backed away off the bridge."

" _Your_ gun," Frank corrected. "Mason intended to have you killed with your own missing duty weapon. They had it all this time."

"Right, which just makes this look worse for me doesn't it? But I didn't know that it was mine," Jamie defended. "When I stopped there was all this blood on my coat. I couldn't even figure out where it was coming from at first. I pulled my scarf off and wrapped it tight around Danny's arm then turned back to go get Matthew... but he… he must have been soaked in gas from rolling on the ground and then it… he… everything went up. The smoke and fire… it just all exploded in a second," he recalled the horror of witnessing Matthew Malevsky burn to death like a tiki torch in front of the Jeep.

"Jesus, he was still alive at first, but I couldn't get near him… I tried, I swear I really tried!"

"Wait, so you were going to risk your life for him after all that?" Eddie gasped. "Why?"

"Ed, no one… no one should die like that… I'll never," he shook at the graphic image ironically burned in his brain. "Hearing and seeing him… I'll never forget."

"So that's how you took in all that smoke and lost your voice," she surmised and turned to the others. "Kenzie said his leg was already hurt in the accident and he still did all that. See? Doesn't that show he was trying to help?"

"Not really," Jack admitted and crossed something off in his copious notes.

"But you managed to keep your head together," Frank sought to encourage his youngest who was looking a bit shell-shocked now that everything had come out in the open. "You took care of your brother. You put a pressure wrap on his arm and left him with a phone. You got him help in time by risking yourself for him, Jamie… you climbed up to the top of that ridge on a broken leg. It was a brave thing to do, and that's what you need to remember about this."

"Yeah, and now would be a good time for him to return the favor," Eddie hissed under her breath as despite her earlier resolve, this admission had done nothing but ignite some anger once more towards the older Reagan brother who had seemingly left her husband out in the cold at that accident scene and still today was providing no support.

"Alright, I'm sorry! I know what I said before," she dialed it back again after receiving disappointed looks from around the room. "I _am_ trying to understand! It's just thinking of Jamie going through that alone, and us almost losing him… it hurts my heart," she admitted with a deflated, sad sigh. "But I also know after all he's done for us… if Danny could have helped, he would have," she reasoned and thought back to her own brush with job-related stress when she had been forced to shoot and kill in the line of duty… her hands had been shaking so badly days later she had run home to hide, needing help from an understanding partner just to let go and cry, something that a big, tough Daniel Reagan probably had a harder time with. "So what he's going through, if it's this bad after all these years... then he must feel really guilty now on top of all that too; I know I would have. I just want this to be over for both of them!"

"Well, it won't be unless there's something in that story we can use," Henry huffed, looking for anything that would clear his youngest grandson, and at the same time reveal what was behind his older brother's inaction.

"There is… and it's cut and dried," Jack commented as he put his pen and paper down and sought to move on from another emotion-filled in-depth Danny Reagan discussion. His focus was on the case and he needed some indisputable facts to win it and thought he might have just found them.

"How so?" the Reagan family patriarch grumped at first, furious that maybe Boyle was ready to give up and take the easy way out of his commitment by advising to take a plea deal instead.

"It's a he said, he's dead, but he said… could go either way with a jury, and what Mason claimed about Jamie shooting him is borne out by the facts and evidence. There are just one or two things missing," the wily defense attorney revealed.

"What?

"There was a second gun," Jack reminded them. "One that had to be tossed somewhere between that bridge and the corner where Malevsky was found in the car since there's no report of it being found. He couldn't have gotten far with those injuries. We find that and tie it to a bullet at the scene forensically… self-defense, he fired first, game over," he assured. "Too bad for us Danny's wound was a through and through. If the surgeon had taken out the bullet, that would have clinched it, but if what you said is true… the evidence is still out there."

"Yeah, too bad he didn't hand it over on a silver platter. The doc said a fraction of an inch further in and he would have bled to death in minutes," Henry bit back sarcastically. "And the gun's probably in the river."

"Maybe… maybe not. I doubt after being hit Mason would have thought to get rid of it that fast… more likely dropped it somewhere near where he passed out."

"And you expect the crime scene guy from the Podunk Co. police department to find this magical gun and bullet for us?" Erin sniped with frustration at her ex-husband's smugness. "That's your grand plan, Jack? He probably doubles as their dog catcher and he won't even look since they've already got everything they need to frame Jamie!"

"Well, this is going to be fun with you second-guessing me all along the way, isn't it, dear?" he bit back contentiously and considered the likely fights to play out between them in the next months if he was unable to clear her baby brother. "Of course I'm not going to leave it to chance… or a damn dog catcher. I've got people, and now that I know what to look for I'll send them after it, but that part of it I can't cover and given the area we have to search it won't be cheap, especially if we need divers."

"Do it," Frank ordered as he looked at his youngest son and daughter-in-law who were sure to be facing numerous other challenges before this all played out. "You know I'm good for it."

###

"See, lambchop, I told you not to worry," Eddie soothed with a hand on Jamie's chest later that night as they lay together stretched out alone on the couch after cuddling for hours with Kaylin, unwilling to be parted again for the night with a return to sleeping in the dining room for him even though he was unable to navigate the stairs once more and make it up to their own bed.

"Even if Danny can't help until he sorts through this; Jack's got a plan."

"Ed, be serious," he snorted, absolutely hating the fact that he was being forced to place their very future in his sister's ex-husband's hands, the man who had all but abandoned her and Nicki these last years and had set them both up for recurring trust issues. "Erin's right. Knowing those things are out there, finding them and using that to prove my innocence are three very different things," he reminded sadly even as he reached in to give her a soft kiss on the cheek for her continued, unwavering support.

"I _am_ serious," she countered. "That's what's gonna happen… I believe, remember?"

"And a thousand more things can still go wrong. This is still going to take time… time we don't have before our munchie is ready to be born, and she has to come first, no matter what," he warned while rubbing her belly and following the little taps, pushes and kicks as their beloved bean appeared to be practicing backflips at the moment. "Even if that means I can't be there with you. And if… _if_ all that works out, I'm still gonna be screwed out of work. If I look for a job at a firm here in the city… with all this publicity, no one is going to want to risk that hire. We still might have to leave to get away from it."

"But you don't want to be just a lawyer, anyway," she reminded. "You wanted to use your other skills too and be more of a special investigator."

"What I _wanted_ was to stay a beat cop before any of this started, but none of that seems to matter anymore," he sighed in defeat. "God, Ed, I miss the street… and now things are so screwed up with this home incarceration I can't even look out the front door without checking in with my probation officer. Wait until I try to explain that to Kaylin when she begs me to take her somewhere and I have to say no."

"Don't… please don't get down on yourself," she begged. "I know this is a lot to take again, and you're back almost to square one with your rehab, but we have good things to look forward to… a new baby and the rest of our lives together. We just have to take it one step at a time, alright? Whatever happens, we're in it as a team… promise me you believe that too."

"Okay, Edit Katalin, I promise... to try at least," he attempted to pacify her, too tired now for a continuing midnight chitchat. "I just wish if we were in something together right now, it was our own bed," he quipped with another hug but an uncomfortable shift of his weight although neither of them was ready to forego this closeness and move elsewhere. "I think I miss that most of all 'cause if we stay here like this on the couch for longer than tonight my back will go out and I'll never have to worry about walking again."

"Soon, baby… you'll see, it will all be over," Eddie agreed and closed her eyes to snuggle into his side for the first restful sleep that had come to either of them in days. "Right now though I could just lay here with you forever."

* * *

 _Oops, poor Eddie might be singing a different tune next time as we move ahead a few months and find that some tables have turned for our lovebirds as they await news on different fronts and Danny might have the opportunity he needs to redeem himself._

 _Apologies if this is dredging up some things for some readers (c-c I'm so sorry for your loss!), I knew the PTSD would be a touchy subject, and I'm no expert so was nervous to include it… having seen just a small bit of that come up when my brother returned from being deployed for months at sea in the middle of a tense political situation. He changed afterward and his best friend did not come home (freak accident, but there were plenty of suicides too). I'm thankful for our family it was not worse, and he eventually put it behind him, but it took a long time. Please don't be upset with Henry and Eddie, or even Jamie for some of their comments… they all have good hearts, but I needed to use them for dialogue to point out how difficult this can be for everyone involved… friends, family and the person they love. Danny is a strong character, so it's hard for them to imagine him needing help instead of providing it… and it's not easy to make him seem vulnerable!_

 _As for the stories, I will continue to write them as they come to me... sometimes that might be Jamko dominant, and sometimes I will explore the rest of the family around them as is the case in the one to follow called "Where the Heart Lies" - to me that's the fun of this!_


	102. Chapter 102

Chapter 102

"Jamison! I need to get out of this bed! It's been like... _forever!"_ Eddie wailed more than two months later as the tables had turned and she lay on her left side on the now dreaded and what appeared to be an almost permanent addition to their former dining room along with her constant feline companion who had taken to guarding her as vigilantly as he did Kaylin. "And will you please get this cat out of here?! He's just been sitting there staring at me all day! It's starting to creep me out! Please? Pretty please with some of your silly organic confectioners' sugar on top? Just for a little while? I'm so _tired_ of staying in here, my back's been hurting all morning, and we're having _my_ baby shower today! I should be able to get up and enjoy it! Yesterday was Mother's Day and you wouldn't even let me come out for dinner! It's not fair!"

"Nuh-uh, lambchop… you heard what Dr. Geisner said on Friday, no getting out of jail free card for either of us and for the record you've only been stuck in there full-time over the weekend… you're lucky she agreed to let you stay home until tomorrow so we could reschedule your party at the last minute for tonight," Jamie reminded as he turned the corner from the hall, once again permitted to bear weight on his leg as he crutched in with some folded laundry in his ever-present over-the-shoulder tote while dressed comfortably in sweats and a blue tee, sporting a week's worth of rough-faced scruff despite Kaylin's continued objections. "Three days… that's a cakewalk. You're gonna have a total of two weeks, tops. Mom spent practically her whole pregnancy on full bed rest with me. She went so nutty she started talking to the damn Jameson Whiskey bottle that Dad knocked her up with for Christ's sake, remember?… How'd you think I got my name? Then he spelled it wrong on the birth certificate because he was so stressed out! See? It's not easy for the man either. Try doing hard time like that… besides, it's been months for me."

"Well, it sure looks that way," she frowned at his appearance which had become increasingly casual as his home incarceration now stretched well into its ninth week while the wheels of justice turned slowly since the rural community he was charged in only paneled a grand jury every sixty days and they had just missed the cutoff last time.

"What's that supposed to mean?" he feigned innocence while gently shooshing their big, persistent kitty down to the floor and putting some of his wife's things away in a drawer while sadly noting her completely pre-packed and ordered bag sitting next to the chair ready to take to the hospital the following morning as they were finally at the point for the baby's sake that it was necessary for Eddie to be monitored in the high-risk OB ward full time as her fluid levels had remained near dangerously low levels. At just 36 weeks along now, Dr. Geisner was hoping to stave off premature labor for at least another fortnight in order to get them closer to term before a scheduled c-section in order to give their tiny, eighth-percentile-for-gestational-age baby more time to develop and a better chance at survival.

"It means you look like a bum, _that's_ what it means," she sniped back even while knowing that all his worry and guilt over their current situation had morphed into this Mr. Mom homemaker version of Jamison Reagan as he had become more mobile over the course of the last months without an outlet for his energy. Instead, he had taken to cleaning their already tidy home from top to bottom daily and obsessing over workout and cooking shows while teaching himself to become a more than passable home gourmet chef on Quincy's advice as a way to deal with the boredom and stress. "Please promise me you'll at least shave and change before everyone gets here."

"Of course, anything for you my love... if I have time… oh, wait… I've got nowhere else to go."

"Jamie, the grand jury has been meeting for more than a week… they even agreed to a Saturday morning session the other day to move this along," she reminded him of where the case stood. "Danny's probably going to testify today," she tried to hearten. "They found the bullet that hit him, and that's going to show you were telling the truth about Mason firing at you… self-defense."

"They found _fragments_ of the bullet," he corrected as he pulled a Swiffer duster out of his back pocket and made careful work of going over the already pristine surfaces in the room. "Not enough to positively ID the gun it was fired from… the one they never found," he emphasized as all hope for dropped charges over its discovery had been slowly extinguished. If anything, the fact that it was still MIA had just strengthened the state's case against him. "No way to prove it didn't come from Matthew's... I mean mine… you know the one registered to me with my fingerprints all over it."

"So what? You think they're going to believe you shot your own brother in the middle of all that and he's willing to testify otherwise?"

"Well, Pierce is bringing in Renzulli to establish the fact that it was my gun in the first place, and that I claimed it was taken from my locker at the precinct even though there was no sign of the lock being tampered with… so yeah, it's not a stretch to think he's going to try to turn him against me too."

"Danny would never do that!"

"We don't know what he's going to do or say… if anything," he griped as he flitted around the room on his obsessive mission to put some order back in his world even as everyone else threatened to take it away. "Besides, it's going to look really great since Dad already got up there the other day and confirmed Mason's dying declaration for everyone to see and hear… Imagine what that was like, my own father," he frowned and pictured the scene that had taken place in that courtroom. "The family's sure got my back."

" _Please state your name and occupation for the record," prosecutor Nathaniel Pierce directed from his podium stand as a larger-than-life figure occupied the well-worn witness chair in the rural century-old courtroom in front of a panel of near starstruck grand jurists._

" _Francis Xavier Reagan," the gruff voice revealed with obvious contempt. "NYPD Police Commissioner."_

" _And your relationship to the defendant, Jamison Henry Reagan?"_

" _He is my youngest son," Frank informed in a steady voice after a deep breath even as his mustache twitched revealing the tension while he pushed his glasses back._

" _On the morning of March 14th of this year, did you receive a notice from your assistant, a Detective Baker, informing you that the decedent, Mason Malevsky, had requested your presence in his room at the Columbia Medical Center… the very same hospital your two sons had been taken to I believe."_

" _Yes," came the curt reply._

" _And were you present when the doctors explained to him that without extraordinary measures he would likely die within the hour from massive internal injuries caused by a single gunshot wound to the abdomen… and even with those measures, it was just a matter of time?"_

" _Yes."_

" _And did he in your presence and that of another officer, with full knowledge he was about to die, then declare that Jamison Henry Reagan had deliberately caused injury and death to both his son, Matthew and himself as was read in transcript 6-A provided?"_

" _Yes," Frank Reagan was forced to admit in front of a room full of strangers who were being charged with determining the future course of his youngest son's life._

" _Thank you, Commissioner Reagan, that will be all."_

"Jamie, they didn't have a choice, they were subpoenaed and Danny's therapist told your brother not to talk to anyone else in the family about what happened or why he acted like that until they work through some stuff, but he said he _is_ going to do this for you… he came to visit me the other day when you were at PT and promised! You'll see! The grand jury's going to no bill this as soon as it's over! Jack said not to worry!"

"Ed, can we please _not_ do this now? You're leaving for the hospital in less than twenty-four hours, and best case I'll still be stuck here waiting to hear their decision. I have to clean up and make the hors-d'oeuvres before the girls come over for your shower this afternoon since the caterer bailed when they had to bump up the date," he pleaded as he stopped and closed his eyes while facing the wall away from her, willing those emotions to be stuffed back down again before they could well up and explode. A sickening knot had formed in his stomach ever since Dr. Geisner had revealed a few days before that the timetable for baby Margaret Katalin Reagan's arrival had been pushed forward and that he was almost sure to miss the big event the way things were going. It had been his idea to name her after two of the strongest women in his life and Eddie agreed that would be a perfect choice for their daughter.

"Don't worry though, I've got it all taken care of; your mom took Kaylin out to buy stuff for the non-alcoholic sangria since that's your favorite, Quince is making dessert and Erin is bringing the sandwich and fruit trays..."

"Yes, we are going to do this now, come over here and sit with me," she demanded while patting the bed next to her. "NOW!" Eddie added in her toughest mommy-edged voice. "There's not an iota of dust that dares to show itself in this house, you already spent all night decorating and I don't give a flying fig or a head of lettuce or however big the baby is supposed to be this week about whatever fancy-dancy crackers and dip you were planning to slave away over in the kitchen for a party if you're going to make me stay here in this room, anyway!"

"It was actually fig crostini," he admitted sheepishly before conceding and doing her bidding. "With goat cheese and almonds on toasted baguettes. I saw it on the Food Network last week, and you don't have to stay in here, I was going to have your mom help me push the bed out in the living room for you..."

"JAMISON REAGAN! Enough is enough!" Eddie cried and then doubled over a little as a bit of that cramping continued in her lower back. "Ow, baby, please don't do that to mommy again today!"

"Wait, what do you mean again?" Jamie immediately refocused and jumped on that admission as he looked at her with concern. "Ed, have you been having more pains like that?"

"Off and on, don't worry they're just Braxton Hicks contractions… false labor. My body's just practicing; it's completely normal. I started having them Friday when I was in Dr. Geisner's office for the appointment and she told me that's what they were."

"But how many?" Jamie persisted, having had ample time over the past two months aside from his culinary focus to obsess on this and acquire an almost encyclopedic knowledge of all things pertaining to late-stage pregnancy, labor and delivery particularly for babies with suspected kidney issues, low fluid levels, and intrauterine growth restriction. "How long do they last? More than 30 seconds? Do they stop when you change positions?"

"Jamie, I don't know," she flustered. "It's really not that bad and I haven't honestly been paying attention. They're off and on for like a minute… I told you. Maybe five or six since breakfast."

"Eddie, any more than four an hour could be true labor," Jamie nervously chewed his lip, wanting nothing more than to immediately to scoop her into his arms and run out the door to take her back to the hospital where she and his baby could be checked and would be safe in the event this was a sign of things going forward, but of course he was unable to do so without a warrant being issued for his arrest.

"But it hasn't been," she tried to assure him. "At least I don't think so… besides, it's too early. We'd have another month to go if she didn't want to do the c-section before that. I know you're uptight waiting for word from Jack about the decision, and you haven't said anything but tomorrow is the anniversary of Joe's death and yesterday was Mother's Day, so all that always makes you sad, especially because you can't be with Danny either… that's what this is all about. You're just missing them and nervous about something else being wrong with what's happening. I don't want you to panic."

"Ed, I'm not panicking," he insisted even though he was honestly starting to do just that. "I'm telling you it's a published fact that four or more of those an hour lasting over 30 seconds mean you could be in true labor," he argued. "Have you been drinking your water? Dehydration can start it too."

"Okay, Dr. Reagan, I'll have another glass right now and then we'll start keeping track, okay? If I have four in the next hour, we'll call Dr. Geisner and ask her what to do," she compromised. "If she says I have to come in right away instead of waiting until tomorrow, I will, but I really don't want to miss my shower tonight," she pleaded. "Please? I may not get to share everything with you and I want us to at least have this together. It's important to me. Now go shave and change into something nice for my party," she insisted with a nudge. "I don't want all my friends to think I got knocked up by a bum."

###

"Danny, are you doing okay, honey? Do you want some water or anything before they call you in there?" Linda fretted over her husband as she held his hand while they waited in the hall at the courthouse for his name to be announced.

"How about some scotch instead?" he blew out a nervous breath as he glanced down towards the far end of the floor where Jack Boyle could be seen pacing agitatedly back and forth with a phone practically glued to his ear while his sister leaned up against a window sill and watched with her arms tightly crossed—the tension between them was palpable even from a distance. "Erin looks pissed," he noted. "She's really been really hammering him since they found out that Eddie has to go into the hospital tomorrow… she's afraid the kid's going to go off the reservation and violate his house arrest before this is over."

"And you aren't?" his wife questioned.

"I guess I was kinda hoping it would be over today so we wouldn't have to worry about that," Danny admitted quietly as he shifted his weight and sat back with his head against the wall looking up at the ceiling. "Dr. Morris… he says I have to be confident that I can walk in there and do this so we did all this visualization on how it would go…" he trailed off. "In case Pierce tries to rattle me I'm supposed to picture the doc sitting there in the jury box and no one else since he already knows everything anyway… and now I sound like a damn nut that needs a therapist here to hold his hand."

" _I'm_ holding your hand," Linda reminded as she pulled it into her lap and covered it, through everything she had been a constant source of support over the past months. "That's _my_ job… to be here for you, remember? And, Danny, there's no shame in needing help… these last few weeks have been better; you've been sleeping through the night and you stopped having that dream, plus since the cast came off you were cleared to go back to work. Dr. Morris was right about how he's had you work through everything so far, and you trust him, don't you? After this is over today he said it's okay to see Jamie again. It's good."

"Better for me, Lin… but my brother, he needs _this_ to go good _._ I'm his voice… he didn't even get a chance to testify himself. I think he should have taken the stand, but Jack talked him out of it because he couldn't cross-examine him. That damn Pierce knows the jury would take one look at the kid and believe him though, and I have to be able to do this after everything he went through or he'll never forgive me. Hell, I'll never forgive myself if things get any worse for them or if he misses the baby coming, especially if something goes wrong… he'll hate me, probably already does, and I don't blame him for that."

"Danny! That's not true, he loves you! See… that's exactly what you weren't supposed to do… get in your head and put too much pressure on yourself," Linda counseled. "You will do this for him because you're ready to, and once it's done, we'll all put it behind us and move on… I've talked to him and so has Erin and your dad… I told him what Dr. Morris said so he understands why you haven't been able to see him all this time… I think he was more worried it was something he did. That's where he and Eddie are at with this, plus he's gonna be a new baby daddy soon and even Jamie Reagan is going to need his big brother's help with that."

"He's already a great dad," Danny murmured before practicing some of his coping skills to move the conversation back to something more comfortable to keep his anxiety in check. "You've been a really good sister for Eddie too," he added. "If this runs late I don't want you to miss her shower, okay? Go ahead over and help them set up. You two new moms have to stick together. I'll catch a ride home with Dad… you know he's gonna show up here in a minute anyway… three… two… one… speak of the devil," he added as Frank Reagan strode around the corner right on cue as expected and paused down at the end of the hall to speak in confidence to Erin and Jack for several minutes before moving towards them.

"Daniel, Linda," Frank greeted them with a warm and what he hoped was a confidence-inspiring smile that would mask the unsettling news he had just received which would no doubt pile too much pressure on his oldest to take with him into the sealed courtroom if it was shared too soon.

"How are you feeling, son?" he asked instead with a hand on his shoulder while trying to gauge his mood.

"Good… ready for this to be over with," Danny nodded with a tight-lipped frown. "Seems like they're running a little late though; I thought I'd be done by now. Did Jack have anything to say?"

"Only that you appear to be the final witness scheduled to call. Renzulli's in there now from what we can tell… Pierce actually attached an order to his subpoena directing him not to disclose it to us and impede an ongoing investigation… Jack had a field day with that and threatened to file his own complaint with the state Supreme Court's Grievance Committee for violating a witnesses' constitutional rights… He wants Pierce to realize how far he'll be out of his element if he tries to take this to trial. I know I never liked the guy, but I'm actually glad the slimeball's on our side in this," he coughed out an underhanded compliment for his former son-in-law. "We need to get this sorted as soon as possible," he added with an anxious sigh and another look down the hall to his daughter who had resumed pacing herself with a phone in hand and responded with a negative shake of her head when she caught his eye.

"What's going on, Dad?" Danny became suspicious at the silent interchange as he picked up on the new level of tension. "Did you talk to the kid today? Is he doing okay?"

"I did," Frank answered only half honestly without disclosing the whole truth as their mission to free Jamie had taken on a new urgency and required some tactful deceit at this critical point. "He's… he's fine for now. Erin's still trying to get him approved for additional time out with his probation officer so he can be with Eddie in case the decision doesn't come back today. It's short notice though since they normally require 48-hours, and the PO didn't pick up on Friday or over the weekend so it doesn't look like she's getting anywhere… just a longshot," he admitted sadly.

"Dad, if there's something I should know…" Danny trailed off just as the courtroom door opened to reveal a flustered and angry-looking Anthony Renzulli leaving after being dismissed before his own name was called.

"Daniel Reagan?"

"Go… I'll be right here, we'll talk when you're done," Frank encouraged with a firm hand on his son's arm as they stood together while Linda held onto the other side for strength. "It'll be fine, you can do this. Pierce can't outsmart you… you're too good for him. Just tell the truth and don't get caught up and defensive, Danny… that's all your brother needs you to do, alright? Once the jury hears that, they'll see what he did was justified. I'm proud of you for facing this."

"Me too, and I love you," Linda added with a supportive kiss on his cheek.

"Reagan?" came the prodding reminder.

"I'm here," Danny spoke up with all the confidence he could muster as he relied on his role-playing and therapist's advice. "And I'm ready, so let's get this done," he added as he walked inside before the heavy door closed behind the court officer with a muted thud.

"Frank," Linda murmured as she reached over and slipped her arm around his elbow as they continued to stare forward to where her husband had disappeared. "He's been working so hard on this. Do you think he'll be able to do it?"

"He _has_ to," her father-in-law deflated as his shoulders dropped and he closed his eyes while praying for strength for both of his sons who were each facing a separate crisis now. "Linda… I lied when I said everything was fine… Jamie called all worked up twenty minutes ago," he revealed the reason for added angst. "The shower is off; Eva's taken Eddie to the hospital. It looks like she's in labor right now and it's progressing despite their efforts. If they can't stop it, the baby will be coming today."

"Oh no!" Linda paled. "They just measured Friday and estimated she's not even five pounds! She's so little and Dr. Geisner didn't think the lungs were mature enough yet… that's why they wanted Eddie to be monitored on the high-risk unit for the next two weeks! They'll at least try to give her steroids to push them along, but even that takes a while to work. She needs more time! Frank, there's no way... and Jamie can't be there?"

"No, not without risking a violation and serving time in jail even if he's no billed here. He'd be picked up almost immediately with that GPS unit. Quincy and Pop are at the house threatening to tie him down right now and Jack and Erin are trying some kind of Hail Mary to get the charges dropped today regardless of the decision here, but they wouldn't tell me what it was they were doing, and I probably shouldn't know," he reported.

"What can I do?" Linda begged. "I have to do something too! And please don't just ask me to offer a pleading prayer!" she referred back to a familiar time when they were in a similar situation together after Henry's heart attack.

"Why don't you head to St. Victor's," Frank advised. "This could take a while and Eddie probably needs more womanly support right now than maybe Eva can offer," he admitted while recalling the sometimes contentious mother-daughter relationship which had a tendency to boil over in a hot-blooded way under stressful situations like the one that was evolving today. "I'll be here for Danny," he promised. "As soon as he hears he's going to want to go see his brother, anyway, and I need to be there for both of my boys."

* * *

 _Showtime! A lot happening now on all fronts as in the next chapters we follow Danny through his testimony, Eddie through her labor with Mommazilla at her side, Jamie as he paces the walls back at the house, and Erin and Jack as they work together for the first time in years to try to free him in time._


	103. Chapter 103

Chapter 103

"I'm sorry, sir, I feel like I let him down," a repentant Anthony Renzulli apologized after approaching the Commissioner once Linda had reluctantly agreed to head for St. Victor's to support her sister-in-law, torn about leaving her husband in this state, but knowing that Danny would have insisted she do just that when he learned of the circumstances. "He got my words all twisted up when he brought up that time Jamie went off the air with Vinny and chased down that perp that attacked your father at the ATM… said it showed a pattern of abuse. Now all of them in that room think he's always been a loose cannon. IT AIN'T RIGHT!" he railed back. "He can't even defend himself!"

"Tony, you know how this works, that's what a trial is for… Jack didn't want Jamie to take the stand here because the defense wouldn't have been able to cross-examine him and it was likely in this small community that whatever he said would get out and taint the jury pool… it's too one-sided. Pierce is just trying to string this out as long as possible to keep his name in the press and get it noticed, that's all."

"It ain't 'just all' for Jamie though is it?" Renzulli insisted while shaking his head with guilt. "He's been through enough! I gotta do somethin' for him!"

"We're all trying, but it has to be sooner rather than later now," Frank sighed as he spotted Erin and Jack making their way towards them. "Eddie just went to the hospital in labor," he explained to the already upset Lieutenant before addressing his daughter who was in a similar mindset knowing how high the stakes were right now. "Anything, sweetheart?" he added hopefully.

"No, Dad," she reported in frustration. "I can't get his parole officer out here to pick up… they said he's taken a personal day and won't be in the office until tomorrow. Jamie's not the one having the medical emergency so leaving a message on the machine and letting him go isn't an option; it would still be a violation. Jack might have come up with something though," she deferred to her ex-husband who joined them just as he hung up his phone.

"I might be on to that gun that Malevsky dropped," he explained briefly as Frank's ears perked up. "Let's just say I heard a rumor… and it's one that I tend to believe."

"Really?" the Commissioner prodded at that bit of brightness, having given up hope when their investigators were unable to come up with the weapon after extensive searching, and it had been assumed to be lost somewhere in the rushing current of the river that night. "So it wasn't tossed over at the bridge?"

"No, I never thought he would have thrown it that fast; it doesn't make sense," Jack insisted as this part of the case had been nagging at him from the beginning. "He had to have time to come up with a plan. Even if he did, it wouldn't have gone downstream that far because except for when there's a storm, that part of the river is shallow. We searched both sides of the road all the way up to the corner where Malevsky was found with detection dogs without a hit, right? It wasn't on him at either hospital as far as we can tell, so what did we miss?"

"I don't know," Frank acknowledged as that very same question had been one to keep him up almost every night since. "I've run through the same scenario a thousand times and thought we covered everywhere crime scene didn't. We even found the bullet fragments left in the clearing."

"Well, we expected it to be where he left it, and maybe that was our problem," Jack asserted. "Listen, I've got a lead, but I can't afford to let it get out if I'm wrong… it could compromise us for later. If we want to get this done today, I need someone I can trust to run a sting who's not on their radar in the press or related to you," he divulged with a sideways glance towards the dark-haired Renzulli who, when dressed in civilian attire in a dark suit, bore little resemblance to an NYPD Lieutenant. "Erin thought you might be the man for the job… you up for a little trip?"

"For Harvard? I'd do anything!" the trusted off-duty officer volunteered without a second thought. "Even if it's gotta be with the likes of you," he made clear his disdain for Boyle though after years of having good collars tossed by lawyers of his ilk.

"Do I want to know about this, or not?" Frank huffed and wondered if it was wise to let another one of his men get involved in what seemed to be something underhanded.

"Let's go with 'or not' to be safe... plausible deniability," Erin coughed out as she stepped in to handle her father before he could get into it with her former husband. "You want to let him do this," she advised strongly. "I'd call Anthony, but having Renzulli here will be faster."

"Then Godspeed and get on with it... do good work," Frank conceded and gave his blessing with a wave of his hand as he watched the two men depart on their secretive mission before turning and sitting down heavily on the bench outside the courtroom to wait and wonder as his oldest son was grilled inside. "I hate the fact we have to trust that guy."

"I know, but this is our best chance for today, and we have to make this work; Jamie can't miss this time with Eddie and the baby… I'm so scared for him, Dad! What if something happens to either of them and he's not there? He'll never forgive himself! It's not fair!"

"No, it is not, and if I could take his place… I would in a heartbeat," Frank mused as he allowed himself a moment of concern over his expected grandchild and daughter-in-law while he took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes before replacing them. "I wish more than anything Mason had come after me instead of my boys."

"He did… he did this because he knew how to hurt you, and now Pierce is doing the same to Jamie. Why do you think they focused on him and didn't file anything against Danny?" Erin wondered after another pause to pace back and forth for a moment before she joined him. "He's the one who was driving, and it was his idea to go up there that night. If this case had been on my desk, I would have charged both and added conspiracy."

"Well then, thanks be this didn't happen in Manhattan," Frank smirked as he squeezed her hand. "If I had to guess, it's because Jamie is the one that fired at Mason and it was his gun found at the scene; he was the easiest target. Danny was injured and never pulled his weapon… Pierce will use that against him and make it seem as if he sided against his own brother."

"You think that's what he's doing right now, don't you?" Erin worried over how her older sibling was handling himself inside. "Trying to make it sound like Danny knew better and Jamie didn't have to use deadly force? I just wish we could be in there for him."

Indeed, at that very moment inside the courtroom the exact scenario they were discussing was being played out as the adversaries had just gotten past the point of introductions and into the heart of the matter.

"So, Detective Reagan, if in fact, you thought your lives were in danger, why didn't you pull your gun? Your right arm was uninjured, and you are a highly decorated NYPD officer with almost twenty years of experience, yet it never left your holster," Pierce was attempting to cut through his defenses right away. "Was it because your brother lied in his statement and that Matthew Malevsky was indeed there to render aid as his father stated?"

"No," came the flat reply.

"No? Detective Reagan, I would ask you to elaborate on your answer."

"No, my brother did not lie," Danny relented carefully as he closed his eyes to picture Dr. Morris as the sole occupant of the jurors' seats, even as he felt the pressure building in his chest while he forced himself to think of those moments. "He was trying to pull me out of the car when Matthew put a gun to his back and forced him to the front of the vehicle."

"You mean when Jamison Reagan used his own gun to force Matthew Malevsky to the front of the car… the one we have already established was registered to him as a rookie patrol officer in the NYPD before being conveniently reported as stolen out of his locker in the middle of a secure police precinct? That's why you didn't feel the need to pull your weapon, isn't it? Did Matthew Malevsky, also a former NYPD detective, struggle for the weapon and in that action it was fired with the bullet hitting the hood of your car and a fragment then striking you near the brachial artery in your left arm? That's what caused your injury, wasn't it?"

"No! I told you, Matthew never fired his gun!" Danny insisted while the timbre of his voice began to elevate despite his inner attempt to stay calm. _CRAP!_ he thought to himself. _Now I just made it sound like he was the victim and Jamie had no reason to fight back!_

"And did that action enrage Jamison Reagan to the point where he struck down Matthew Malevsky and left him incapacitated on the ground in front of the car before he turned and fired at an unarmed Mason Malevsky? A man who was posing no threat to anyone at that time as he stood next to his car on the bridge, a distance of approximately thirty yards away?"

"No! Matthew was about to shoot Jamie! My brother was the one on the ground! He… h-he said not to hurt his family and dropped there to give me a clear shot, and I… I didn't t-take it," he stuttered out as the anxiety notched up, and he prayed he wouldn't get physically ill in front of everyone as his stomach dropped at that cowardly admission.

"And you expect the jury to believe that a detective of your caliber, one that is credited with numerous citations and medals for bravery both within the NYPD and earlier during not one, but two distinguished tours of service as a Marine in Iraq failed to act when his own brother's life was in danger?"

"I… I froze," Danny admitted in just a whisper above the sound of blood now pounding in his ears while his face flushed.

"Pardon?" Pierce continued to hammer relentlessly. "I couldn't hear you, please repeat that for the record."

"I said… I FROZE!" Danny shouted back at volume this time as he gulped for air and every muscle in his body tensed while he willed himself to go on and admit to something out loud that shamed him to his very core. "Don't you understand?"

"None of this is in your initial statement which previously was read into the record," Pierce pointed out. "In fact, the officer who interviewed you noted immediately after surgery that you were unable to recall with clarity anything between the point of Matthew Malevsky approaching your car and the time you woke up in the hospital the following morning. Your surgeon testified that you would have lost consciousness quickly due to blood loss. Now you expect this jury to believe you just happened to recover that memory in such a way it corroborates everything your brother claims without any physical evidence to support that?"

"I was able to recall," Danny explained evenly as he stared down Pierce. "It just took two months of therapy to be able to admit to myself or anyone else that Jamie had to do those things to save me because I couldn't help myself. As a detective and a Marine…" he paused and choked up before continuing with resolve. "As his _brother_ , that's hard to accept because I let him down and forced him to risk everything for me. I will not do that again here today," he stated firmly with conviction as if he was speaking directly to Dr. Morris like they had practiced.

"I direct you to answer only the questions asked," Pierce ordered as he had no intention of allowing Danny to leave a favorable impression of Jamie as the last thing the grand jury heard before they deliberated.

"Then I will tell you exactly what happened. I froze because…" he closed his eyes and once again recalled with absolute vivid detail that awful event in Fallujah that had been shoved into the darkest recesses of his mind and yet still haunted him in the background all these years. It wasn't the one everyone had always assumed to be the reason behind his wall—that day when his entire unit save him was lost—but another Dr. Morris had finally painstakingly peeled back layer by layer until it was exposed in its ugliest light—Jamie's seventeenth birthday, the phone call half a world away from each other—and instead of sharing a bit of family normalcy they had argued bitterly over his youngest brother's decision to follow Mary's wishes and apply for early admission to Harvard for undergrad work, an ivy league school so far away from what Danny had become…

" _That's what you wanted to tell me? That I'm busting my ass here every day away from my wife and son so you can go up there with a bunch of other privileged do-nothing bookends to sit around, smoke a little weed and discuss everything we're doing wrong over here? Coming from our family, do you even know what it means to serve?"_

" _No, but I know I hate you! You're always such a hardass! Nothing I ever do is right! So now you're pissed off that I don't want to be a cop when you spent my whole life telling me I wasn't cut out for it?! Why can't you ever just be happy for me?!" Jamie had finally cried in utter frustration before angrily slamming down the phone and effectively severing their ties._

 _The two would not speak again for months._

It had been in that frame of a guilty mindset just an hour later when Pfc. Daniel Reagan had reacted to an attack on their compound by firing on an insurgent dressed in one of their own uniforms, and instead of an enemy, when the bloody body was rolled over all he had seen was the face of a young boy who in death so closely resembled his innocent brother that it had remained the stuff of nightmares and had been seared in his shocked brain forever since.

" _What the hell? He's just a kid, not a soldier," Jimmy Beale had spat on the ground in disgust as he toed over the mortally wounded teenager with hair dyed sandy brown to fit in among the American GI's that was now lying before him in a pool of blood having obviously just taken his last breath. "Damn Ali Babas must be getting desperate sending one of these at us. Shouldn't have been in here."_

 _"Oh, God! I SHOT HIM! He's NOT one of us, right?" Danny stood back in shock, having momentarily panicked at the sight of that uniform lying there after reacting purely on instinct during the attack. "Jesus, he looks just like… Are you sure? Why was he here?!"_

" _Nope, he's not one of us. Only one reason why he was in this camp dressed like that... kill or be killed. You did good Reagan, probably saved half the platoon... Ooh-rah!" came the fierce battle cry._

Looking back now, that was the exact point in time when Danny had decided he never, ever wanted to see his kind-hearted youngest sibling follow in his footsteps again.

"I froze because... the truth is he wasn't supposed to be there. I never wanted to see him in a position where he had to do such things… I never wanted him to be a soldier like me, or a cop like me because he was my little brother and I didn't want to think he was capable, but I was wrong. He's always been strong and good enough, and I never told him that," he paused to swallow before continuing in an even tone that left little doubt as it spelled out everything exactly as it had happened. "Matthew Malevsky was about to shoot Jamie right there in front of the car and then leave me to die in that fire. I failed to react when he needed me most. My brother knocked him down somehow and then came over to the passenger door to pull my sorry ass out of there while Mason shot at us from the bridge. That was the bullet that ricocheted off the hood and hit my arm. Jamie managed to get me away from the car. He picked up the gun that Matthew dropped and fired once at the Chevelle as he was dragging me across to the trees all while he had a broken leg… he risked losing that for me too, and afterward, he nearly burned himself trying to go back for the guy that ran him over in the first place... because that's the kind of man and cop he is. Matthew Malevsky admitted to driving the Chevelle that hit him in DC, and his father was behind the rest of it."

"Jury will move to strike that last comment, hearsay," Pierce countered.

"No more than what you're trying to use against him," Danny retaliated with a familiar glint in his eye and new confidence in his voice as the weight of fifteen years was lifted off his chest, and he was ready to play the game at full strength now. He had admitted to the truth here in front of what could be a sealed, impartial audience, but since that was done felt emboldened to carry that through and confess the same to his brother as soon as possible. Indeed, it was with that thought of reuniting with Jamie in mind that he hurried out of the courtroom after being quickly dismissed once Pierce determined that Danny had gained the upper hand and the jurors were beginning to relate to him and his now unruffled, plausible answers.

"Dad! I did it! It's over!" he offered with a sigh as the relief poured off of him and he greeted his father and sister outside of the courtroom. "You were right! When I felt myself getting rattled I just focused on what Morris taught me and told them the truth. The jurors believed me, I know it! They're going to come back in Jamie's favor… you'll see! Where's Linda?" he asked after an eager look around for his wife. "Did she go to help set up for the shower?"

"Not exactly… she did leave go to see Eddie," Frank revealed somewhat covertly as he motioned his son to come sit next to him while Erin got to her feet to make room. "Sweetheart, go see if you can find out when they expect a decision," he advised his daughter as he sought to give Danny some space to come to terms with what had just happened as well as the news he was about to deliver since the messages coming in from the hospital for the last hour had been less than optimistic about the chances of stopping his daughter-in-law's labor.

"Good job, Danny… I'm so glad for you big brother," Erin hugged him a little longer than usual.

"Hey, aren't you headed over there too now that this is done?" he asked expectantly. "Can I catch a ride with you? Eddie won't mind if I stop in to see the kid while she's having her party, will she? He'll probably get on everyone's nerves following them around with coasters for their drinks, anyway."

"No… I don't think she'd mind if you saw Jamie," Erin replied with a touch of sadness and a 'what are you going to say to him' look directed at her father before leaving to go see if she could ferret out that information as quickly as possible.

"Wait, what's the matter with her?" Danny asked as he watched his sister walk away and suddenly grew uneasy again remembering that strange vibe his father had projected earlier.

"You said Jamie was fine," he accused as he wheeled around.

"Son, I didn't want to tell you before you went in to testify, but Eddie's already gone to the hospital… they think she's in the beginning stages of labor," Frank reported gently as he watched Danny go pale at that revelation. "That's where Linda went."

"But it's too early… they can stop it like they did when Jack was born, right?" he bargained as he considered the fact that despite his efforts Jamie was still sequestered at home until there was a formal ruling one way or another. "Linda started around this time too, and they gave her something so it didn't happen for two more weeks! This'll be over then!"

"I'm sure they're going to try if it's in the baby's best interest," his father replied before adding a reminder. "This pregnancy has been more complicated though, and Eva texted a few minutes ago… now they're worried that the placenta is not acting sufficiently anymore because her growth has been so slow this past week. She could be stressed which is what started this. It might be better if she comes today even though it's early and then she'll most likely have to stay in the NICU for some time. Dr. Geisner is going to talk to Eddie and Jamie in a few minutes as soon as some tests come back to see what they want to do. It's a gamble either way."

"DAMN IT!" Danny railed back. "I thought I did enough!" he added as they spotted Erin coming back around the corner shaking her head.

"It won't be today… the session's over since they worked overtime on Saturday. They sent the jurors home already, and the clerk said there wouldn't be a ruling until the end of the week at the earliest."

"But Pierce could drop the charges, couldn't he?" Danny added desperately as he went out on a limb and tried to come up with some way to make this situation better. "We could talk to him right now and tell him what's happening! He knows he's wrong, anyway!"

"That's not going to happen," Erin dissented as she grabbed his arm. "Our only hope… and I can't believe I'm saying this... is to let Jack handle it. We need to be with Jamie, okay? He needs his family around him."

"No, he needs to be with _Eddie,"_ Danny insisted. "God, I can't face him now!"

"Yes, you can," Frank determined with another firm hold on his oldest son's shoulder as they turned to walk down the hall and take the hour's drive back to Bay Ridge. "It's been long enough, and this is the time he needs all of us."

* * *

 _So now we know what's been behind a good part of Danny's PTSD all this time, but will any of that even matter as everyone's focus will be on a tiny Reagan bean preparing to sprout earlier than expected. Next up, our rattled lovebirds need to have a serious talk about what would be best for their little one._


	104. Chapter 104

Chapter 104

"Jamie, I just don't know what to do!" Eddie cried as the couple spoke over the phone and tried to come to terms privately with the options that had just been presented to them. "I really don't feel like she's ready to be here yet, and I can't go through this alone without you!"

"Ed, now, yes you can," he tried to convince her even as his own heart was breaking at not being able to be there and hold her hand through this or experience the arrival of their baby himself. "You're not alone, you've got your mom and Linda with you, okay? You know I would do anything…" he paused and noted the fact that both Quincy and his grandfather had strategically separated and placed themselves within steps of both outside exits as soon as it became clear that Dr. Geisner's recommendation was to let things proceed naturally on their own and allow the baby come today. The hope was that the steroid treatment already received would do enough in the meantime to help mature those fragile looking lungs.

"But I can't do _that_ , Eddie. If I did, it would only make things worse, and I'd probably miss everything, anyway. My parole guy's a real piece of..."

"No, I know… I don't want you to get in trouble, but what if we just try to wait a few more days?" she continued to bargain. "Then you can talk to him tomorrow and see if he'll clear you to come here. It's still early. Dr. Geisner said the contractions are far enough apart they can probably stop them. I'm only at two or three centimeters. I'll just stay here and let them monitor her, and then maybe the grand jury stuff would be over, and we could be together?"

"Eddie, she also said the baby's showing indications of being stressed, and trying to put it off might make that worse… No, I think this is a sign that we have to do what's best for her. She has a better chance on the outside now… Honey, don't cry, please… no… no... I know it's not your fault," he tried to assure as he could hear her sobbing quietly on the other end and knew she was carrying the guilt of a mother who felt like her body was failing to protect her own child.

"You did everything you could to get this far after what I put you through, but now we have to give her what she needs, alright? None of this will matter after it's all over as long as she's healthy. We'll get through it. Just forget about me; I want you both to be safe."

"Yes, it does matter!" she railed back. "This is _our_ baby… and I want you here with me! You deserve to be with us!"

"Ed, we can't do anything else now, and I need you to promise," he replied back firmly even as he was struggling to keep his voice steady so as not to further upset her. "We've gotta put this part of it behind us and accept it. You have to start focusing on relaxing and letting this happen, so lean on Linda and your mom, okay? Just think about the baby. I'm here, and I'm fine, you don't have to worry about that. Pop and Quincy are taking care of Kaylin and me… she's back from school and asking about how her baby sister is and when she'll be able to come see her. See? You're already such a good mom, lambchop. You managed to help her work through those things, and now she's secure and excited about it," he fluffed a little since mostly at this point his preschool-aged daughter had been more distressed over the notion that Eddie and Eva left without her and the fact the party was canceled than anything else.

"Now, I want you to do this for our little Maggie and me," he reiterated, the irony of the chosen nickname for their newborn not lost on him considering the dream he'd had about Addison and George's expected addition… at least her real name wasn't going to be Magenta he consoled himself. "Tell Dr. Geisner you'll go on with it."

"Okay, but it's just..." Eddie caved and was forced to pause for a breath as another contraction hit… the sixth one that hour already she noted sadly as they were now less than ten minutes apart and starting to grow a bit stronger in intensity. "Then I still have to get admitted and moved to a different room, so that might take a while…"

"I'm not going anywhere, alright? I'll be here whenever you need me," he vowed.

"I'm really scared though," she finally admitted to her greatest fear in a small voice. "What if… what if I have to have a c-section and something happens?… Jamie, there won't be one of us to hold her or stay with her if… she shouldn't be alone!"

"Please, God don't… Ed, please don't think like that… and your mom is there."

"No… I'm not sure she can, not after what happened to her before... when her baby... We've talked about it… she fell apart afterward, and Linda, it's too much."

"Okay, then my dad… if they can't, and I'm not there… Eddie, I'll make sure he is so Eva can stay with you no matter what, okay? He's been through all this before with my mom, and he'll be with you too. But none of that is ever going to happen though, do you hear me? You're going to be fine, and so is she. Remember, everything is alright until it isn't… and it will be this time, I swear. I love you, Edit Katalin."

"I love you more, Jamison Reagan… The nurse just came in with the paperwork so…. I guess I'll… I've gotta go now. I'll call you back in a little while, okay?"

"Yeah, Ed, I miss you..." Jamie tried to add and then sighed as he listened to the line go dead before suppressing the urge to hurl the phone across the room.

"Is everything okay?" Henry pressed to get his grandson talking immediately before he could sink into his silent shell… something that was not going to be an easy task this day since the answer to that question was already apparent.

"C'mon, Ice, we need to know too," Quincy backed him up. "Annie's been texting me from work to ask how it's going like every two minutes since she dropped me off here."

"No, it's all messed up," came the sad, angry reply. "But Ed's going ahead with it. I don't know if I can do this, Pop… we were supposed to be together and happy today, not scared and away from each other. If something happens to either one of them and I'm not there..."

"Jamie, have some faith, son… from what you've said they're in good hands with that Geisner woman. I know it's hard, but come over here and sit with me… we'll have a little something to calm you down. If you're anything like your father and I were you'll be needing it. Remember, during our days a man's place was to stay outside in the waiting room until it was time to hand out the cigars, and we had no idea about what was going on in there either, so I understand how you feel about not being with your wife… In my case, I was actually on the job that day and missed Francis being born altogether because he was stubborn back then too and more than a week overdue. When he finally made up his mind to come, well, there was no holding him back. Maybe that's where this little girl gets it from. Thanks be to God they were already at the hospital for an appointment, and my Betty handled everything on her own. Eddie is just as strong. Someday I'll tell you about all the things we went through before that… Now, I know it's not the same for you, but your father's on his way over now… he should be here any minute; I guess it's over out there. Maybe he'll have some good news."

"If he did, he would have told you already," Jamie moaned and shook his head with no hint of optimism before getting up. "And I'm not drinking anything either, Pop… I don't want to numb myself while she's there going through all that pain without me… it's not right. I'm just gonna go check on Kaylin," he added before slowly and carefully heading upstairs instead, seeking out the comfort of a little someone who was usually able to make her daddy feel better no matter the circumstances.

"If this baby's anything like him, she's going to come out with those worry wrinkles already set in her forehead," Henry admitted with a defeated shrug towards Quincy.

"Yeah, I get that," the younger man agreed with a nervous glance up the steps. "There's no chance he goes out a window upstairs though, is there?"

Although it was safe to say the possibility had crossed his mind, Jamie was in search of something else at the moment. "Hey," he called from the doorway of Kaylin's room. "How come you're up here alone when Pop Pop and Uncle Quincy are downstairs?"

"Have'ta make a 'well picture for Mommy," she revealed while sitting at her little desk and happily coloring away with Bear on guard from his usual spot on the bed. "Like I did for you, Daddy. Pop Pop say she cried 'fore 'cause her tummy 'urt 'gain, and Nagyanya made 'er go 'way and miss the party, so she didn't get any presents. Is that why you be sad too?"

"No, sweetness… that's not why," he admitted as he looked down the hall to the next door where the color pink was practically radiating out of the room as the early afternoon sun peeked through the windows. "C'mere for a second, okay?" he asked as he took her hand and they walked down to the nursery where she sat in his lap in the comfortable padded rocking chair that had been Henry's early present to his newest expected great-grandchild.

"So, I wanted to tell you that it looks like your baby sister is going to be born later today," he revealed while looking around the room with its sweet, playful baby animal and alphabet figures against a bright pink focal wall with a mix of green and yellow accents that had come as a compromise between the Reagan women… a warm, happy space perfectly appointed for their little munchie with Eva's distinctive flair for tasteful decorating coming through amid her gift of matching whitewashed furniture. All that was needed was the extra clothing, toys, and essentials expected to be received at the shower today.

"That's why Mommy's tummy was hurting again, and she had to go to the hospital with Nagyanya," he continued. "Daddy's just sad that he has to stay here and miss that part because the parole man says I can't leave and be with them right now."

"Why the baby hurted mommy?" Kaylin asked with a renewed frowny face. "S'not nice!"

"No, honey, all babies do that when it's time to be born," Jamie tried to explain and stave off another unfavorable review about her little sister-to-be after so much progress had been made on that front in the previous months. "Your Great-Grandma Betty used to say it's God's way of showing us how much it matters. Mommy will feel better very soon, and you'll be a big sister to a brand new baby like your friend Megan."

"But she had a _brother,_ " Kaylin emphasized as that had been her first choice all along so she could be just like her favored BFF from preschool. "Amy say her little sister cries all time and pulls 'er hair, so Meggie says boy babies are better. Did I 'urt my old mommy and make the bad daddy sad because he was 'way too?" the little girl switched gears and tried to reconcile this with the memory of her birth parents even as the trauma from her rough start in life was mercifully beginning to fade away as she got older.

"Yes, you probably did," Jamie admitted as he considered how Jayne Jeffers might have handled things on her own by self-medicating back then, although from what he had learned from Renzulli her parents had been fairly involved in the beginning before their wild-hearted daughter rebelled again and took to the dead-end road of drugs and partying alone with the baby. "But I don't think the bad daddy cared… and I'm glad he went away though," he added in good riddance to Jared Quinlan as he squeezed and tickled her a little to hear her laugh. "Because this daddy loves you to the moon and back… and that will never, ever change, Kaylin Elizabeth Reagan. Good mommies and daddies always have enough love in their hearts for all their babies, no matter how they come to them," he assured to keep her feeling secure as the family dynamic was about to change in a very big way.

"But maybe 'ometime can me have a baby brother, like Meggie?"

"Maybe sometime, but not for awhile, okay?" Jamie agreed as he hugged her back, definitely feeling a bit more optimistic about the situation than when they had started their little chat… somehow Kaylin was very much like Eddie in that regard he realized. "I'll tell you a secret: Daddy would like a little boy too one day, but we don't get to pick when Mommy has the baby, remember? So it could be another sissy, and I'm already gonna have my hands full with one of me against three of you girls in this house as it is."

"Four and two," his precocious little daughter corrected. "Nagyanya 'here and Bear be a boy."

"Yes, he is, and you're right," he agreed as he could hardly argue with that logic, especially as he saw their protective cat streak by in the hallway on his way to a favored hidden perch at the top of the stairs, which could only indicate they were about to receive guests. "Look… I bet Grandpa is coming," he told her. "Why don't you go see?"

"Yay!" she squealed and got up as visits from Frank almost always included a few of her favorite iced oatmeal cookies, and since Eddie herself had caught a real craving for them the past few weeks, there were none left in the kitchen stash. "C'mon, Daddy!" she tugged at his hand.

"You go, sweetness. I'm just gonna sit up here and rest a little more or do some cleaning while I wait to hear back from Mommy, okay?"

"'Kay!" she agreed before scampering away downstairs to greet whoever was coming. Jamie listened carefully as the front door opened and was of course not surprised to hear his father's deep voice rumbling low and unintelligible at this distance, but what did startle him after all this time was another accompanying higher-pitched curse that left no doubt as to who else was there as Bear had apparently set his sights on an old enemy who had not dared cross the threshold into this house in his presence for months, and was therefore entitled to be viewed and treated as an abject stranger once more.

"Oh for the love of… JESUS! Why does he still do that to me?!" Danny gasped as a familiar dark, hissing form missled past him from above with no warning before alighting on the ground and turning to glare back with simmering iridescent green eyes and a fiercely twitching tail. Clearly, one member of Jamie's household was not inclined to allow him to just waltz in here without paying penance as if nothing had happened. He could only pray that his already stressed brother would not have the same reaction and go for the throat on this tense day.

"Uncle D!" Kaylin ran down the steps and hugged his leg as at least she still held him in high regard. "You come to see me at my house this time!"

"I sure did, cuteness," he immediately picked her up for a much-needed hug, having only seen the little girl sporadically over recent months.

"Bear miss you too!" she declared as her uncle snorted his derision.

"Hey, consider yourself lucky he didn't knock you down this time; Eddie had me to lock him up in the basement the other day when you came over because she was afraid of that… he's gotten twice as bad when he's guarding her these days," Henry huffed as he stood up and walked over with two pre-filled tumblers in his hand which he immediately offered to his son and grandson. "Where's your sister?"

"None for me, Pop…" Frank declined. "I might not be done for the day. We dropped Erin at the office because she thought Jack might call and need her to run some paper for him, so she didn't want to waste time coming from here."

"So there's still hope for something?" Henry perked up with a sprig of eagerness.

"Not much, no, and don't ask… they didn't share the particulars on what it might be, anyway," Frank admitted even as he pulled an expected white paper bag from Wilder's Bakery out of his coat pocket and handed it over to a delighted little girl.

"Thank you much, Grandpa!" she cried and kissed him before skipping over to the kitchen to share with her other cookie buddy, Quincy.

"Be sure to save one for me, sweetheart," Frank called behind her even as he was looking for a read on the current situation in his father's eyes. "How's he doing, Pop?"

"Eh... well, he managed to talk Eddie into letting it go ahead without him a little while ago, so what do you think?" Henry reported as Danny took in that news with a deep gulp of the strong amber scotch all at the same time. "The doctor says it's best for the baby not to put it off anymore, so she's going through with it now… from what Eva told me it's still early though and probably will take some time which is good so the medicine they gave her can work on the lungs," he explained. "Jamie's upstairs in the nursery… Quincy and I made sure he didn't bolt, but he's taking it pretty hard."

"Dad, maybe I should leave," Danny second-guessed the wisdom of trying to reconnect with his brother in the middle of this situation, worried about how his presence here would be taken after the initial excitement of testifying. While with Dr. Morris' help he had managed to overcome to a significant degree what Mason had inflicted with his psychological warfare, Jamie was still reeling from the after-effects that continued to pile up since and were burying him.

"It's probably not a good day to do this."

"You don't have to _do_ anything," Frank disagreed. "Just be here."

"What if he doesn't want to talk to me?" Danny pressed not sure which scenario would be easier. "Or what if he does?"

"Then just listen to what he has to say, and don't take offense no matter what it is," Quincy broke in bluntly as after all this time the older Reagan brother still had not gained his complete respect. "He comes first today. I watched him do that for you the past two months... putting up with feeling helpless and out of control. This here though, what's going on with him and Eddie… that's what he needs to focus on, and even if he says so, he's not gonna be ready to hear what you need to tell him. He can't be looking at anything else while he's trying to get through this."

"He's right, Danny… just let your brother decide what he wants from us. Now come on," Frank added firmly as he took his son's arm and led him to the staircase even as his oldest decided to chug the rest of his whiskey in one final shot for courage and waited to feel it burn all the way down before reluctantly following him up the steps.

"Jamie?" his father called out even though he was sure there was no need to announce their arrival after all the hoopla downstairs. "Son, are you up here?" he frowned when there was no answer at first.

"Yeah, Dad… in the baby's room," Jamie finally admitted as he had hidden in the closet momentarily on the premise of pulling out some of the cute, already pre-laundered little onesies that Eddie had purchased herself in search of one that might fit their tiny preemie for the trip home should the need hopefully arise.

"I came to tell you the grand jury's done hearing testimony," Frank encouraged even as he continued to speak to his son's back. "They should have a decision by the end of this week… and I brought someone else to see you."

"I figured," came the tense acknowledgment although he still refused to turn around while he wrestled with his feelings over Danny's presence here on a day when he was struggling not to wear his emotions on his sleeve. "How'd it go?" he managed to choke out roughly before stopping to lean up against the shelves while taking a few deep breaths to try to steady himself.

"Kid, c'mon… please?" his older brother sighed with heavy regret and glassy eyes when Jamie still refused to face him. Even from behind he was shocked to see the change in his sibling's appearance over the past two months. It was evident given the defined biceps and shoulders under his shirt that he had focused as much on a physical outlet for his stress as he had on cleaning and culinary pursuits, not unlike the prisoners in jail who spent untold hours toning up as an expression of their boredom, Danny noted. Despite his still-present limp and crutches, Jamie had never appeared more fit and as a bonus was finally clean shaven and dressed per Eddie's wishes before she left.

"Hey, you look good…" Danny trailed off as he searched for an opening. "Listen, we don't have to talk about anything else today… It's not important. I know you've got a lot on your mind right now and I'm so sorry all this is happening. I'd give anything if… I just want to be here for you, okay? Please let me do that," he tried Quincy's tact as a means to break… well the ice, ironically. "This is some room," he added in awkward small-talk as he looked around the distinctly bright and feminine space when there was still no outward response. "I bet Linda's gonna want one like this if it's a girl when Marcus's baby comes. The boys will have a fit, especially Jack. He's still not on board with everything."

"She might," Jamie replied back tightly after a long pause as he initially ignored that invitation to open up a dialogue although finally dared to turn around and Danny was saddened to see the look that accompanied it as his brother glanced his way briefly without making eye contact before moving over to one of the dressers to continue his mission to sort through the baby's apparel. "And Kaylin warmed up to the idea when she found out she could help," he finally likewise softened and gave in to a degree. "She picked the border out because she wanted to be able to teach the baby the alphabet."

"Yeah, Linda mentioned that she was doing a lot better with things now, so that's really good. We'll have to try something like that with Jack."

"Jamie," Frank coughed out and while encouraged, tried to break this all too polite, yet at the same time uncomfortable, strained conversation on the finer points of nursery decoration and parenting between his sons since there was more to be addressed than was being said and things were obviously time sensitive now. "I wanted to let you know that Erin and Jack are still working on something for today, but I don't think we should set our hopes on it."

"I figured," came the repeated, now resigned reply that had Danny clenching his fists in guilty frustration at the situation once more.

"Pop said that Eddie's agreed to move forward with it," their father continued carefully as he tried to open up a more appropriate outlet in their conversation. "How's that going? What do you need from us?"

"I don't know… I mean she um, she said she'll call back when they settled her in a room," his youngest floundered as he tried but failed to keep everything bottled up tightly and finally collapsed back into the chair with his head down in his hands. "It's just starting… so they gave her some meds to help the baby's lungs, and as long as things go on normally they'll just let her come on her own, but…" he stopped, trying to form the words to ask his father to stand by in case the unthinkable happened.

"But what, son?" Frank prodded gently.

"We won't know until she's born if that worked… if it didn't then sometimes they only have a few minutes before… and if they have to take her with a c-section, then Eddie won't be able to go with her, so she wants someone there in case…" he was having difficulty trying to breathe through the tightness in his chest and the tears that now ran unashamedly down his face as he could not bear to say that very real possibility out loud. "You know to stay with the baby and hold her while she… because Ed's afraid that her mom can't handle it alone if…"

"Jamison," his father stopped that run with a hand on his shoulder as his own eyes welled up and he heard not his son, but Mary's pleading voice to do the same during one of those times of loss long ago, and the last when this youngest child of his had come into the world in similar distress. "What you're asking for… I promise I will be there for her, for all of you, but only because I'm selfish and want the chance to meet my grandbaby first before she's scooped up by everyone else and I need to take a number to hold her before she's ready for school, alright?" he tried to hearten and lighten the heavy mood in the room. "You know how the women in this family are and don't even get me started on Pop."

"Yeah," Jamie rasped as he nodded with a little huff and looked up in gratitude for what Frank had done. "Okay... thanks, Dad."

"Good," Frank nodded as he glanced over at Danny who was standing there misty-eyed on his own, almost afraid to say anything else to upset the balance. "Now, then before I have to leave let's all go downstairs to get something to eat and talk some more," he encouraged, knowing it would be some time before his two boys would be able to put all of this behind them, but at least this was a start.

"You know how your grandfather cooks when he's anxious, and I have the feeling we're going to be at this for a while today."

###

"You sure this is gonna work?" Renzulli griped as he fidgeted behind the tinted windows in the backseat of Jack Boyle's car while trying to make himself look less like a cop and more like a career criminal. "It's legit?"

"As long as you can pull it off, this will give us the leverage we need to get those charges dropped today," Boyle assured as he kept a watchful eye on an approaching wary young man in the rearview mirror who hesitated and looked around the quiet street before opening the door to a nondescript, seedy-looking bar and entering. "And there he is… God, I love it when a plan comes together," he bragged. "You ready? Remember, this guy's definitely low-level and not that bright. He's also got a $150 a day drug habit, and he's desperate. If he asks, turn this phone off and lay it on the bar," he instructed as he handed the device back to the undercover Lieutenant. "The recorder will still be active. Erin didn't have time to get Detective Abetemarco out to bug the place. We're in the city limits, and all we need is the transaction to go through so we can flip him on his old man who's going to give us what we want, okay? Let him walk out the door and those ATF agents waiting over there will be all over him. It goes Federal then and keeps the Reagans out of it."

"And this is gonna get Harvard to the hospital in time to be with Eddie?"

"As long as we have that gun in our hands, I guarantee Pierce will offer to drive him there himself," Boyle assured. "He's going to do everything he can to mitigate this when he realizes how bad it looks for him… when it all comes out, he'll be the one getting sanctions from the Grievance Committee tomorrow morning."

* * *

 _Next, we'll find out if Jack's plan works and check in with Eddie to see how things are going with Mommazilla in attendance. Only five chapters left, so to keep things rolling along, we'll go with a M/W/F posting schedule next week and then close out the following with the last two._


	105. Chapter 105

Chapter 105

"Everything's looking good here," Dr. Geisner assured after another check a bit later in the afternoon. "It's going a little slow, but the baby's heart rate is steady, and you're past four centimeters now, so that's coming into the active labor phase which will probably last another three to five hours, with contractions every five minutes or so, alright? They're going to start to feel stronger and longer."

"OW! NO... KIDDING!…" Eddie griped as she squirmed to her side as another hit while Eva fussed over straightening the sheets and pillows, feeling helpless to do anything else as she watched her daughter struggling in both physical and emotional pain.

"Perhaps it is time to think about having the spinal done as Linda recommended," her mother offered.

"That could move things along. It might also help a little if we rupture your membranes when you've progressed a bit," the doctor advised even though she knew her patient was against such a notion. "But with so little fluid in there I'm worried about cord compression, so it would be best for now if we didn't. We could use patient-controlled epidural analgesia so you could push a button to dose yourself with medication. Eddie, you're very tense, and pain relief at this point might help you relax."

"NO! I know what that is! Jamie had one for weeks. I DON'T WANT IT! I told you I have to give the baby and him as much time as I can… and ow!" she paused long enough to pant through the rest of the contraction. "She needs those steroids to work... and I need him here!" she cried, still devastated at his absence and becoming increasingly desperate as things went forward without him.

"Breathe, my lány, as he said… it is time to put that hope aside and focus on this… Jamison understands."

"Eddie, there is only marginal evidence that epidurals speed up labor… you would be more comfortable."

"No, go away! I just want Jamie!" she replied petulantly before curling up facing away from the two older women who looked at each other with concern as without Eddie's cooperation this seemed likely to turn into a long ordeal for everyone involved.

"I'll come back in a little while in case you change your mind," Dr. Geisner offered softly with a frown as she made a note in her chart.

###

"Any word from Erin?" Henry asked quietly when Frank returned to the kitchen to rinse out his coffee mug before leaving for St. Victor's on a mission of mercy.

"No, nothing," his son reported with a glance at his watch. "It's after four. If something was going to come of whatever it was they were up to… I guess it would have been by now," he concluded with a shrug.

"No news is good news."

"Not in this case, Pop."

"Well at least the three boys are talking," Henry nodded to the living room where Danny and Quincy were purposefully squabbling over channel surfing in an attempt to take Jamie's mind off everything else that was going on without him. Another chat with Eddie trying to convince her to accept the help she was being offered had not gone well, and it was decided that it was time for Frank to make his way to the hospital in an effort to change her mind before it was too late for such intervention.

"Yes, about everything except what they really need to say to each other," Frank added. "But that will come at least… I hope. It's not for today though."

"What do you think the chances of this going to trial are, Francis? It's already dragged on for too long."

"It looks pretty bad. You know a grand jury's more likely to indict than not. I think once Jamie's able to give evidence the tide will turn in our favor… Pierce will likely offer a plea deal before we get that far, but I'll be damned if my son doesn't get a chance to clear himself completely."

"And then what?" Henry pressed. "I know with all this publicity he's talking about leaving again to find work… and after everything we've gone through I'm not willing to lose them, are you?"

"One step at a time, Pop," Frank sighed with another glance at the clock. "I didn't want to leave him today… but I promised," he admitted, suddenly feeling far too old to face the prospects that were waiting for him at the hospital. "Brings back those times with Mary," he added sadly remembering the two tiny babies his own wife had lost during multiple, heartbreaking miscarriages. "Especially the second after Joe… the one we were able to hold. Jamie doesn't know about that, and I never thought I'd have to face something like this again."

"Your mother was there for you even after what she had been through herself," Henry reminded. "It's what we do for our own."

"I know, and we both needed to lean on her… that's why I said I would do this for them, but after how hard it was on Mary… I don't want to see Eddie go through that."

"And my Betty, too," Henry agreed. "She was never the same after Peter. But there's always been more good than bad here in this house," he encouraged as he looked around at his old home, filled to the rafters with Reagan family memories. "Just do what you can, and your mother will be with you again… she was always her best at times like these, remember? See if you can talk the girl into looking after herself. She'll listen to you. I'd come myself, but we both can't leave him."

"Okay, Pop… I'll try," Frank conceded with a deep breath just as his phone buzzed with a long-awaited message from Erin.

 _On my way over! Don't tell Jamie yet, but I think Jack's done it!_

"Praise be to Jesus!" Henry huffed as his heart soared and he clapped his son on the back. "I might just have to eat some crow tonight if that slimeball pulls this off!"

###

"Hold that elevator!" a somewhat familiar voice called out and Nathaniel Pierce, dressed in a fine suit for a celebratory early evening dinner with his wife in the Northern Manhattan section of the city, made no effort to stop the door from closing before scowling as he recognized precisely who the rude interloper was once Jack Boyle managed to shove himself into the car with them.

"What are you doing?" the annoyed prosecutor challenged as his wife looked on with concern at her husband's reaction to this unexpected intrusion. "Are you following me? How did you know we were even here? This is unconscionable conduct!" he griped. "I will report you for harassment!"

"Oh, I think maybe you'll want to hear what I have to say," Jack replied with a cold smile. "Especially if you don't want things to get worse and open yourself up to a civil suit. And for the record, I have already filed a grievance against you for prosecutorial misconduct for failing to disclose exculpatory evidence for starters… after that, well, you might just be looking for your own defense attorney, but I'll leave that up to the state Supreme Court's authority."

"Based on WHAT?!" Pierce challenged as his jaw dropped open in apparent shock, although, given the way his face blanched, it was obvious he realized this was no bluff. "If this is some kind of intimidation tactic from the Reagans, I can assure you…"

"I can assure you that I would not be here if I didn't already have everything I need," Boyle revealed grimly on a deliberate tact to make things sound as ominous as possible as he waived the manila envelope he was holding. "Gotta hand it to you, having that gun disappear like that was almost a thing of genius… almost. I mean this whole case just fell into your lap at the perfect time, didn't it? How far were you planning to take it? A high profile defendant who just happens to be the son of the NYPD Police Commissioner, and you saw your chance to milk it all the way to an appointment in the State's Attorney General's office, right? Did Robert Lewis promise you something? I'm sure I could subpoena your phone records. We all know he's not a fan of the Reagans and loves to come after them at every opportunity. Never mind, don't answer that question, I don't want to be called in to testify… I mean we are talking about my former in-laws and there's only so much love lost there."

"Then why are you here?" Pierce bristled as he nervously hit the stop button to stall the elevator's ascent and keep their conversation strictly in private.

"Well, believe it or not, I do still have an on and off thing with my ex, and if there's one thing that will set her off, it's seeing her little brother miss the birth of his child because someone is playing politics with his life… so you can imagine what she's been like today after hearing that his wife has gone into premature labor this afternoon after a difficult pregnancy which means there's more than a small chance that something might go wrong. Because of you dragging this out in the Podunk grand jury, he's still on house arrest, and that parole officer you appointed is AWOL. Just imagine how that will go over in the press when they find out that you knew all along that Mason Malevsky was carrying a gun that night and played an active role in hiding that fact?"

"Nate!" Pierce's wife gasped out loud, having been promised that after years of waiting for her husband's career to pick up they were finally on track for a move onwards, and now seeing that possibility turn into something much worse. "Is that true?"

"Of course not!" Pierce snarled. "And there's no proof of that!"

"Oh, but there is," Boyle returned. "You see most of the time in my business, the clients are guilty, so I don't waste too much effort or money on investigators because I get paid to get them off by making my own holes like this one in the prosecution's case, but Jamie Reagan… he's a squeaky clean boy scout. If he says there was a gun, I'd bet my life on it, so I looked for it everywhere… in the river, along the road, even in the backseat of that good samaritan's car, you know? Nothing, nada… so I asked myself who could have taken it? Remote area, unlikely someone just picked it up before the search. Has to be someone already involved, right? The Reagans don't have it; the Malevsky's don't have it, Deputy Daryl struck me as a straight-shooter, so he probably doesn't have it. Turns out the supposed good guy in this who found Malevsky and took him to the hospital, Carl Martin, _Senior,"_ he let that last word drip venomously. "He's got this son…"

Pierce's defiant gaze faltered at that familiar mention.

"So Junior… it seems he's had some trouble with the law before… even ended up with a drug possession charge that got wiped recently by your office," Jack insinuated plainly. "Trouble is, once a junkie, always a junkie and you know you can't trust them… they talk, they steal stuff to support their habit, they're friendly with all types of seedy elements… did I mention they talk?" he reminded pointedly. "So my ears went up when one of the CIs I put on him came back and told me Junior was overheard offering to trade a Glock 22 .40 S&W for some nose candy. Did you know that's a standard issue weapon for the FBI? Yeah, imagine that… just like something Mason Malevsky might have had on hand even after he retired. You should have made sure Martin Sr. got rid of that piece once he found it under the backseat of his car where it fell out of Malevsky's pocket because Junior just tried to sell it to an undercover cop and the ATF have him in custody," he reported and handed the envelope over. "Here's the report and the statement as to how it came into his possession… he's got added charges for resisting arrest and a felony assault on a police officer, so he's being _very_ helpful at this time… something about the three strike rule. He'd say anything right now to keep from getting hooked on a life sentence."

"DAMN IT! I had nothing to do with that!" Pierce insisted with wide eyes as he paged through the documents and saw his decade-long stagnant career in a little, rural county circling the drain along with his marriage as his disbelieving and suddenly unsupportive wife looked on.

"You have no proof!"

"Maybe, maybe not… but I gotta say it looks _really_ bad for you, I mean what with those dropped charges, right? Sort of smells like quid pro quo, and the fact that you've been using this case to keep your name afloat in the press for so long… it's at least going to open up a very public investigation into who knew what and when. Now if I was a prosecutor on a case like this, and I knew I had a potential career-ending media bomb on my hands, particularly if the high profile and sympathetic defendant in this instance were made to miss something as important as the birth of his baby… I'd be on the phone right now having all charges dropped and instruct a certain parole officer to turn off that GPS tracker so that he could go to be with his wife, right before I held a press conference to let everyone know why I did just that the second that exculpatory evidence came to light. Jamison Reagan comes out of this as clean and innocent as that newborn baby he's waiting for," he warned plainly. "Or I'll make a stink like you can't even imagine across this whole state all the way to Albany… gotta keep the little woman happy," he grinned crassly with every intention of using this to win points and just perhaps something else from Erin since working with her so closely over the past few months had rekindled a few things between them. "I might even get lucky myself tonight."

###

"Dad, c'mon! I thought you were going to go to the hospital and talk to Eddie! She's not listening to me!" Jamie griped in frustration as he slammed his phone down on the table again. "Eva said she's at six centimeters now and Dr. Geisner doesn't want her moving around too much anymore or getting out of bed because the contractions are only four minutes apart. She's just laying there crying and she still won't allow them to give her anything! We have to do something! She's not even letting Linda help!"

"Jamie, I'll leave as soon as your sister gets here," Frank tried to put him off again.

"You said that over an hour ago!" his youngest complained as he anxiously got to his feet, unsteady without his crutches, but unable to sit still any longer and suddenly willing to do almost anything to get to that hospital on his own, even if that meant a familiar trip down some steps and another ambulance ride.

"Daddy, you're not 'posed to do that!" Kaylin chided as she brought them over. "Mommy be mad!"

"Ice, don't even think about it!" Quincy warned as he caught on and moved to block his path.

"Kid, knock it off!" Danny read his intentions clearly and likewise stood up, determined not to let his brother purposefully hurt himself again for any reason. "If you think I'm going to sit here and watch while you try something stupid like that…"

"What?" Jamie snapped back. " _Now_ you want to be my big brother? Where were you these last two months, Danny?!" he finally choked out as he could no longer take it under the stress of the moment and addressed the elephant in the room they had been ignoring all afternoon. "Where were you _that_ night? I NEEDED YOU! I tried to understand, I really did… but you couldn't even tell me why? Couldn't come to me and talk before this?"

"No, I couldn't… I wanted to, but I didn't even understand it myself," his older brother admitted shamefully. "I should'a dealt with this years ago, but things happened while I was over there… bad things and I got them all mixed up in my head… Dr. Morris helped straighten me out. Seeing you on the ground like that brought it all back," he added shaking his head. "I never wanted to talk about it before because if you knew… if you knew about some of the things I did back then maybe you wouldn't be so proud of me… none of you would," he revealed with a deep, shaky breath as he looked around the room at everyone's rapt faces.

"Daniel, we all have things to regret," Henry tried to assure him. "Every one of us… there's no judgment here; you can say anything you need to in front of us."

"NO! Now's not the time for this! Kid," he turned his attention back to Jamie. "I promise one day soon we'll sit down and talk it out, but I don't want you to mix up all this stuff and remember it together too. Let today be about Eddie and the baby, okay? I just want to be happy for you… that's what you always said you needed from me, right?" he flashed back to the incident that had started everything, that phone call from so far away. "I know this whole situation sucks and I'm so sorry for that… if there was anything else I could do..." he trailed off just as he caught Erin excitedly pounding on the front door even while she was entering the security code on the panel to open it before dragging in someone by the arm that Jamie instantly recognized as his previously absent and strictly unsympathetic parole officer.

"I told you; there he is!... NOW TAKE IT OFF!" Erin practically shouted as she shoved the man towards her brother. "Sit down, Jamie!" she ordered. "That ankle bracelet is coming off for good! JACK DID IT! All the charges are dropped! We don't have to wait for the grand jury to come back! Pierce is having a press conference tomorrow morning to announce it. You've been completely exonerated! IT'S OVER!"

"Wait, what?" Jamie gasped in shock since he had been unaware until now that there was still any chance and stood transfixed as his heart just about stopped, sure after everything that had happened to this point this was some mistake even as Danny and Quincy were physically putting him back down on the couch, pulling up his left leg to prop it on the coffee table and pushing up the pants hem to comply with his sister's orders.

"You're sure?"

"Got the orders right here, and this one don't take no for an answer," his PO griped. "Could'a just shut it down with a few clicks and taken it off tomorrow, but instead she pulled me right outta my kitchen in the middle of dinner on my day off to come here and do this," he added as he quickly turned off the device and removed it, leaving Jamie with a ring of chaffed skin, but also the feeling of freedom he had not experienced for more than two months. "Go with God," the irate man ordered with a wave of his hand and looked back at Erin. "Now can I get back to my damn clam chowder?"

"YES! Here's the cab fare. GO AWAY AND TAKE THAT THING WITH YOU! My innocent little brother is not going to have that on when he welcomes his new baby girl into this world! Now let's get him to St. Vic's! I'll tell you what happened on the way!... DAD!" she shrilled when no one else moved as quickly as she wanted them to.

"Lights and sirens, dear!" Frank agreed as he picked up Kaylin and Quincy and Danny reversed their efforts and pulled a still-stunned Jamie to his feet while shoving his arms in the waiting crutches. "You heard her! We're all going right now!"

* * *

 _Yes! Way to go Jack, and there's that interesting little wrinkle between him and Erin that's popped up, but we'll keep it for later! It's almost BABY TIME now as Jamie is allowed to fly the coop and reunite with his greatest love and they are finally able to face everything together… safe to say though there is another surprise or two for everyone in store._


	106. Chapter 106

Chapter 106

"Linda, he's not calling me back!" Eddie worried over her husband's sudden, unexplained radio silence, not knowing he was already on his way, as she sniffled and wiped her eyes while snatching some rest between the decreasing duration and growing pain of the contractions. "It's been forever, and his phone's just ringing to voicemail! He must be really mad, or he wound up smashing it against the floor or something. I was so mean to him last time we talked, and he just wants what's best for us! I don't know what's wrong with me! Even Mom said she needed a break… _my_ mother!" she emphasized as her head sank back against the pillow at the thought of what it normally took to make Eva Janko shy away from anything or anyone.

"Eddie, you're having a preterm baby… you're scared and in pain with swinging hormones, plus your husband is under house arrest, so you have all that stress on top of it. Cut yourself a little slack. If Jamie was here right now and none of the rest of that was happening, you'd still be just as hard on him… it's what the men are for at times like this. When I was in labor with Jack, I almost broke Danny's hand because he dared try to hold mine, and the things I said to him…" she trailed off and shook her head while remembering with a small smile now as the heartache from her recent loss had been replaced with the anticipation of an expected addition to their own family in another six weeks' time. "It's no wonder why he thought two were enough. He's already admitted the best part of adopting a baby has to be not listening to me curse at him like a drunken sailor. I might have to hit the bottle when we know she's in labor, just so he can have the whole experience again," she joked.

"You're sure? I'm not a terrible person that has no business trying to do this?"

"No, Eddie, you're not even close to that… and you're going to completely forget everything that's going on right now the second you see the baby, I promise… thank Mother Nature and endorphins for that unconditional love otherwise no one would ever have a second and the whole human race would disappear! But you could be a lot more comfortable until then. Still want to do this without the drugs?" she prodded gently. "It's your first, and you haven't made much progress the last hour, so this might still take a while… sometimes it really slows down until you hit eight or so. You could get some rest until then, and if you do need a c-section, you'd still be awake for it. I know the anesthesiologist coming on duty right now… he's the best," she encouraged. "In and out… you'll hardly feel a thing."

"Really? I could be awake?" Eddie considered her weepy conversation with Jamie about staying with the baby while admitting she was growing exhausted and wondered why she hadn't thought to ask about that before, especially since there had been no promised sign of Frank either. "Okay, maybe you're right… could you get him?" she conceded just as the next round of cramping began. "And hurry!"

###

"Slow down, Speed Racer, before you knock someone else down with those things!" Danny griped as he followed while his brother crutched through the crowded, tight halls of the Emergency Department at St. Victor's hospital at a pace not usually recommended for someone in his condition. "If you had just agreed to use a wheelchair, it would have been safer!" he reminded as they were forced to a sudden halt by the cross traffic of a passing gurney as it was nearly pushed into them. "HEY, WATCH IT!" he barked a warning the annoyed orderly before continuing. "Quincy's smarter… he let Erin push him, and he went without a leg for how long? At least he's not too proud to know his limits with the temporary one he's learning on now!"

"So, where are they? Couldn't keep up with me in this crowd, could they?… We lost them already! And by the way, it was your idea to use this entrance!" Jamie reminded as he restarted and rounded the corner, headed on a beeline for the north set of elevators which he knew from experience led directly up to the labor and delivery wing on the sixth floor where his wife lay waiting.

"Because it's closest to the street, and I knew you didn't want to waste any time coming in from the other side of the building. Relax, will ya? I already told you, Linda texted me back when you couldn't get through, and she said Eddie's doing fine… you've got plenty of time. Eva's in with her now, and they were just waiting for the anesthesiologist guy to finish, that's why she wasn't answering. She said Eddie finally gave in and took the drugs. You're lucky, man, because I gotta tell you, Lin tried it without at first with Jack too, and I swear these women in labor turn into the Incredible Hulk or something… it's like they have superhuman strength. Whatever you do, don't let her sucker you into holding her hand; trust me… I thought Linda busted mine, and she wasn't even sorry about it!"

"I just can't believe after all this the baby's coming already," Jamie huffed as they neared their destination… he was so close now, just a minute or less from reuniting with his wife and putting the past months behind them. "I can't believe the whole thing with Malevsky is over… NO! DAMN IT!" he swore in frustration as they drew close enough to read the 'Out of Order for Service' notices posted on both available elevators.

"I CAN'T BELIEVE IT! You've _got_ to be kidding me!"

"Harvard, is t'at you?" a very familiar, but slightly slurred and surprisingly cheerful voice with a heavy Brooklyn accent called out from behind a curtain at the far end of the hall and once more stopped them in their tracks. "Ten hut! C'mere, front n'center... I wanna see y'er face!"

"Boss? Is that you?" Jamie called and despite his urgent mission to get to Eddie he hesitated at the unexpected order and made his way over to his former TO's bedside only to find him lying in a completely horizontal position on a flat exam table without even a pillow for his head.

"What are you doing here?"

"Jamison, he was right! It is you!" Adele Renzulli jumped to her feet from the side chair with a warm smile as she came over to hug him. "Oh, I'm so glad to see they finally let you out of that house! I was disappointed the shower was canceled until I heard why! Did Eddie have the baby yet?"

"No, uh, not yet… I just got here," Jamie continued to puzzle as he took in his former partner's state which his normally attentive wife seemed to be completely unconcerned with. "What happened to him? Is he okay?"

"Yer damn right m'kay… saved y'er ass by nailing t'at little punk t'day in t'bar," Renzulli happily reported from underneath his blanket in a definite muscle relaxer-enhanced haze. "Just t'rew out m'effin back… but it's feel'in good now."

"Anthony, language!" his wife fussed with a poke to his leg to make her point. "Everyone can hear you!"

"So, what? 'M a grown ass man and 'loud to say what I want!"

"What?! Erin what's he talking about?" Jamie demanded as his sister finally caught up with them while pushing Quincy and his stilted, uncooperative, borrowed hospital-issued wheelchair. "I thought Dad said he was just testifying today? You told me that Jack figured out where the gun was, and the ATF made the arrest!"

"Had t'a get'm for 'em… 'pooked damn bastard tried t'run for it out t'back."

"He helped," Erin tried to explain as she nodded at Renzulli, having neglected to provide all the pertinent details about the afternoon's events in their rush to get there. "Jack needed someone we trusted to go in undercover right away and make the buy to get everything on tape to be sure we could use Martin and his son against Pierce, so he would drop the charges today. Tony volunteered and got the kid to agree to sell him the gun, but when it was over, and they tried to arrest him, he ducked back through the bar…"

"And I 'ackled him," Renzulli reported proudly. "Just 'ike you did w'it the hotdog, kid," he snickered at a favorite memory of their time on the street together. "'Cept this'n tried to use a bottle n'me… made a karate move'n knock'd it right outta his hand."

"God, he tried to cut you?!"

"Yes, but Tony took him to the ground then held him down until the agents could get in there and make the arrest," Erin clarified and finished. "I was going to fill everyone in on all this later, but Jack didn't tell me you were really hurt! He just said you had a little scratch from the broken glass!"

"Nah… noth'in, coupla stitches on my arm 'til my 'ack tight'n'd up where it hit t'bar."

"Now don't you worry," Adele assured as she took in Jamie's shocked and now guilt-ridden face, having no idea that his friend had been asked to risk his life for him. "He has a bruise and some minor muscle spasms, dear," she reported. "It's happened before. They started after he got home, so we came here. They've already taken some x-rays, and they're all clear, we're just waiting for a few hours to let the medicine work before we leave. He overdid it a little today thinking he was a young buck again, that's all. He'll be fine in a week with some ice, aspirin, and a little of my good home cooking."

"If d'at don't kill me first," came the snide comeback which garnered another slap from his ruffled wife.

"I don't know how to thank you," Jamie offered sincerely, overcome with what everyone had been willing to do for him over the past months. "You don't know how much this means to us."

"Then stop starin' at me and get y'er ass outta here, Harvard… go see Eddie," Renzulli ordered before lightening up. "You c'n name t'baby after me… how 'bout Antonia Teodoro Reagan? S'nice, huh?"

"OH NO! THAT'S AWFUL! He's kidding!" Adele chuffed as she gave Jamie a little shove. "GO! Don't waste another minute on him! We'll be praying for Eddie and the little neonata! Tell us when it's all over so I can come up to see! I'll volunteer to babysit her and Kaylin anytime you two need a break!"

"She's right," Danny declared as he took his brother's arm and steered their little procession back towards the other side of the department and another set of elevators just as a more conservative-moving Henry and Frank holding Kaylin by the hands between them joined up with the group as well. "C'mon if we did all this and you still miss that I'm never gonna hear the end of it. Now, let's get you upstairs!"

###

"Okay, you can relax, Mrs. Reagan; we're all done," the anesthesiologist reported as he finished up with her epidural. "Everything went well. You may feel a little groggy, and your legs will be a bit numb, but Dr. Geisner advised she doesn't want you getting up out of bed anyway, so no more samba dancing lessons for the rest of the night," he joked as he cleaned up his supplies and made a note on her chart. "I'm sure you'll be much more comfortable now. Just try to stay still here on your side for a little while and be sure to let the nurse know if you develop a headache."

"Thank you," Eddie sighed as she lay back down as ordered, definitely in less pain as the monitor indicated the next contraction started and yet totally unaware to this point that her wish to have Jamie on hand was about to come true. He had finally managed to make his way up to the floor but was being physically restrained and hushed just outside the room by Linda until they received the all clear that the delicate procedure involving having a catheter placed in Eddie's spine to provide relief was finished. "Mom, I feel so much better," she admitted as Eva had continued to sit with her to hold her hand to steady her during the procedure. "I'm sorry I was acting that way before," she apologized and wiped some tears away from her eyes before closing them finally to rest as what little discomfort she felt faded. "I'm just scared, and I really miss Jamie. Can you please stay with me now? I want you here when she comes."

"I understand, my lány," Eva soothed as she was relieved to see her daughter able to relax a bit although they had been promised she would still be able to feel the contractions somewhat to assist in pushing when the time came. Her thoughts were interrupted almost immediately though as she looked up in the doorway in surprise and spotted her son-in-law standing there, his emotions plain and raw on his face, and it was clear he was there to take her place. "Végül… finally," she murmured to herself and broke out into a smile to welcome him. "Nem igaza van… now it is right. I am always with you, édesem, but there is someone else you wished for who belongs in my place. Soon you will have your own kicsi to hold… be safe my Edit," she leaned over and kissed her daughter on the cheek. "Szeretlek… I love you."

"Wait! What are you talking about Mom?" Eddie questioned, her brow furrowing in concern and not following her mother's gentle prompts as she opened her eyes, still facing away from the door. "You're leaving?"

"Yes, but I think you will not mind when you see why," Eva assured as she stood up.

"Ed," came the one word in the voice she so longed to hear as he tossed his crutches aside against the wall and carefully slipped onto the bed behind her. "I'm here, lambchop… God, I love you so much," he whispered into her ear and kissed the side of her forehead. "It's all over."

"Jamie?!" she gasped in shock and carefully rolled over to see his face as his hand gently caressed her belly and sent shivers through her body despite everything else that was happening. "It's you? You're here?! Really?" she cried, not knowing how or why he had managed this, or if she dared believe what he said was true.

"Really… I'm not going anywhere… they dropped the charges. We'll talk about all that later, okay? It's not important anymore, and I don't want it to have anything to do with this. Nothing else matters to me except what's happening right now."

"Oh, my God! You're here!" she sobbed as he kissed her again while Eva left the room, no longer missed or noticed, to give them the privacy they deserved. "You're really here!"

###

"Danny, I'm so glad you're here," Linda shared similar thoughts as she curled up on the couch and locked arms with her husband down the hall in the waiting room. "I was so worried about you, but your Dad said he would stay until you were finished, and Eddie needed someone…"

"No, it's fine, Lin," he cut her off. "You did the right thing. I'm okay."

"Really? So, your testimony worked? Erin said Jamie's charges were dropped. I'm so proud of you! I know how hard that was!"

"No, uh… it was what Jack did," Danny revealed, still somewhat ashamed of the fact that it had taken him so long to stand up for his brother and in the end, it hadn't really mattered at all. "He found the gun on his own and got Jamie off. Guess he's a better detective than the rest of us," he admitted ruefully as that in and of itself was a bitter pill to swallow given their history. "I couldn't even do that. The grand jury never came back with a decision, so what I said to them didn't mean a damn thing. I didn't do anything for my brother except nearly get him killed that night and then almost make him miss this because it took so long to get my shit together."

"That's not true!" his wife insisted as she turned to search his guilt-ridden, troubled eyes. "Jamie knows that!"

"I'm not so sure, Lin," he revealed sadly. "He could hardly look at me in the beginning when we got back to the house… it feels different between us, or maybe more like the same as it was when he was a teenager and I left for Iraq. After everything that's happened, I couldn't wait to see him, but there's a wall back up now. I thought this last year we finally got closer… you know we had a bridge like you said after Joe died, but I've lost his trust again, big time. He tried, I know he did, but deep down he blames me for what we went through, and I couldn't… I mean it wasn't the right time to explain. You and I haven't even talked about it."

"Because you weren't supposed to! That was part of the process, and Dr. Morris wanted you to work through this alone... to figure it out for yourself first before any of us could turn things around and complicate it with our opinions. What matters is how you think and feel about it… not me, Pop, or your Dad, and not even Jamie. When you're ready… you know we'll all be there for you."

"Will he?" Danny worried as he nodded back down the hall to Eddie's room where his brother could be seen through the doorway hovering over his wife as he assumed his rightful role by her side while she struggled to bring their child into the world. "He _was_ there for me, Lin… totally one-hundred percent, all in, willing to give up everything and I let him down. I've never done that before… not to anyone, let alone my own brother."

"Jamie will come good as long as everything goes okay with Eddie and the baby now," Linda assured as she squeezed his hand. "The stress of all this after what he went through, plus it being Joe's anniversary tomorrow right after Mother's Day of all years… you can't expect him just to bounce back like nothing happened, but he will… he'll forgive you, and you'll know it as soon as he does. He's here, thank goodness that will help and once he holds that little one… babies have a way of erasing all that pain and making everyone realize nothing that happened before matters… for dads too, you'll see. In a few more weeks that'll be you too," she referenced their own expected adoptive bundle. "Pretty soon you'll both be too busy changing diapers to worry about any of this anymore."

"I hope so, Lin," Danny sighed while deciding against mentioning the fact that he sensed Marcus had become just slightly squirrelly over the past weeks when the topic of preparing the final adoption paperwork had been raised… an observance he had kept strictly away from his wife to this point. "I just want everything to go okay for them… and us," he prayed under his breath knowing that neither couple could withstand another devastating heartache right now.

"Eight years ago, right after midnight tonight, I lost one brother because of Sonny Malevsky, and I sure don't want that to happen again."

* * *

 _Up next, one more chitchat for our couple and a big surprise as they await the newest Reagan's arrival and work out a few things between themselves in the meantime._


	107. Chapter 107

Chapter 107

 _8:40 p.m._

"Seven! Only seven freaking centimeters!" Eddie wailed after Dr. Geisner left the room again. "What's taking me so long? Why can't I do this?"

"You _are_ doing this, Ed," Jamie tried to reassure as he sat behind her carefully rubbing her tense neck and shoulders as he had for the last hour. "You're almost there. She said that once you get to eight, it starts to go a lot faster. In just a little while you'll be able to relax and hold this baby, and our lives are going to start all over… no more bad stuff," he promised since both were still anxious over the early birth of their little bean.

"I want ice cream," she griped during her few moments of rest. "To hell with the damn ice chips! I hate them! Avery's Down East New England-style Chocolate Double Fudge Brownie Blizzard, with sprinkles on top. You owe me, Reagan! It's been months since you got me any!"

"Are you kidding? You've never gone without, have you? I even made a spreadsheet to keep track of the local delivery times so your mom could keep the freezer stocked," Jamie reminded as he considered something that had been bothering him since his arrival in light of all that Eva had done for both of them. "I never thought I'd say this, but we couldn't have survived the last six months without her. She was a huge help, so are you sure you don't want her in the delivery room too? You two have gotten so close... I really don't mind, Ed," he admitted to her even though his relationship with his mother-in-law had once been considered anything but civil enough to offer that. "I feel like I owe her."

"No, Jamie… I want this just for us no matter what," Eddie sighed with continued worry over their baby as she lay her head back and tried her best to relax into him while reserving a little strength for what was to come next… over nine hours of labor on top of untold stress was leaving her body feel drained even though that had been masked somewhat as her pain was lessened. "We were alone together on a wonderful honeymoon night when this all started, and that's the way I want it to be now in case something happens to her."

"Eddie, please don't say that… she's going to be fine," his heart tugged at the thought and the resigned tone of her voice again which could be attributed to the exhaustion now. "Both of you."

"It's been forever since it's been you and me with no one else in the way like that… months since we've been really connected," she continued on the same track and reminded him of their lack of physical intimacy since his accident. "First you were hurt, then as soon as you got almost better, you got hurt again, and then we weren't supposed to because of the pregnancy being high risk…"

"And now we won't again for at least another six weeks, because for the record there's still a very important tiny little person coming between us right now," he reminded softly as he switched his hands to the front and gently caressed her taut belly as the muscles contracted again and he could feel his wife's back arch and her breathing change as she absorbed the pains once more. Although for very different reasons, Eddie was right, this was an exceptionally sensual experience between them that he wanted to share only with her. He encouraged her for the next minute or so while her focus was on her labor before finishing his thoughts. "But when we do, it will be everything it was again… soon this will all be behind us," he soothed before adding in a fierce whisper. "I love you so much, lambchop… no matter who's around us or where we are, it's always going to be you and me, Ed… I promise."

"Jamie, please, I want us to stay here… in the city I mean," Eddie admitted abruptly while switching to something else that had been weighing heavily on her despite that vow to stand behind him regardless of where they ended up. "I know what you said about needing to go somewhere else… but no matter what happens I want her and Kaylin to be here with their family. I was ready to move to Washington when you had the job with the FBI… I swear I was, but my Anya is here now, and I love our house," she teared up emotionally as those strong nesting instincts came to the fore again. "I love that it was your grandma's and that Kaylin and the baby have their Grandpas just up the street there… that we can have Sunday dinners with them and Linda, Erin and Nicki can babysit and take them shopping and they can play with their cousins and Danny can be around to help you scare any boys away from them when they're teenagers… I didn't have that growing up, and I don't want to go away."

"I know, honey… I'd give anything to be able to do that for you and our girls. I don't want to leave either; I just don't know what I can do about it… but I'll try, alright?" he caved at the depth of her pleading. "We'll give it six more months. If I can't find something here, we'll talk again, okay? Maybe you'll be a detective by then, and I can stay home as Mr. Mom…" he joked to lighten things. "I'm getting pretty good at it."

"No, God, no!… No more cleaning and cooking shows… not like that, you'll drive me crazy!" Eddie asserted as her back tightened and they started their breathing exercises again.

###

 _9:30 p.m._

"Jamie, what if Kaylin doesn't like her little sister?" Eddie continued to worry over every possible thing that could go wrong after rolling over to her other side as time dragged on, and after careful consultation with Dr. Geisner they decided to have her water broken and forgo any more doses of the medication to see if that might change things up and trigger her to progress more rapidly. "She really wants a baby brother like her friend Megan has," she added while hugging a pillow tightly and waiting for some of the numbness to wear off.

"Ed, we've explained to her that mommies and daddies don't get to pick… she gets that now. You said she was happy to help decorate the nursery," Jamie reminded even as he was likewise forced to get up and move around to stretch a little… despite the headway he had made physically over the course of the past months, he still tended to stiffen and cramp if he remained in one position too long. "Once the baby is here she'll be fine."

"I know… but I want them to be close, and I don't want her to feel different because she's adopted."

"Well, if you look at it that way, this baby is going to be the odd one out… with these three all being around the same age, Danny and Linda's will break the tie."

"That's true," she mused as a little tingling was returning. "You're still going to help them with that, right? Linda's been getting anxious the closer it gets. She wanted to have it all worked out with Marcus by now."

"Danny hasn't asked lately," Jamie admitted as the topic of his brother had been largely avoided to this point and she could tell even now that his legal troubles were over that there were still things unsaid between them. "I gave them the name of a good adoption attorney a while ago," he shrugged.

"Jamison," Eddie chided as she was forced to bear down a little more strongly. "You need to do better than that… it's important… you have to show him… you care…"

"Ed, not now," he begged. "I told you I didn't want any of that to be part of this… and I don't know what to say to him, yet. He said we'd talk later, so let's leave it at that."

"I made up with Erin, and she came through for us today. Someone has to bring you and Danny back together again before it's all over," she gritted. "So maybe this baby… or that one can."

"Joe was always the peacekeeper… he would have known how," Jamie admitted sadly as he looked at the clock. Just over two-and-a-half hours now and it would be another year gone by without his brother… his best friend to that point. "I'll try Eddie," he promised. "Maybe he'll give me a sign."

###

 _10:20 p.m._

"So, we're set on the name then," Eddie panted as she fell back down on the bed. She was at eight centimeters now and had weaned herself to the minimum of the epidural medication she could withstand while preparing to push. The contractions were strong, lasting almost 60 seconds and coming every two minutes or so. "You're not gonna mess anything up, are you?"

"Not a chance," Jamie assured. "Margaret Katalin… my mom's and your middle names. How could I mix that up? You haven't changed your mind, have you?"

"No! But look at what your dad did! I mean he's the Police Commissioner, and he was a freaking Marine for God's sake, and he still screwed up under pressure because he was rattled when you were born. Not sure if I can trust you or not!"

"Eddie," Jamie said shaking his head. "After all that we've been through together, the last thing you should need to worry about is being able to trust me, right? I swear I will not screw this up."

"Better not!" she demanded as she closed her eyes. "Jamie, I'm not sure I can do this anymore," she whimpered. "I'm so tired now."

"I know, Ed," he said as he stroked her. "Dr. Geisner said you're going to be ready to push in another hour or so, okay? Then the baby will be here, and you can rest. Just one more hour Eddie. I know you can do it, lambchop. You're the strongest person I've ever met. Please, honey, just keep fighting a little longer."

###

 _Tuesday, May 15, 12:05 p.m._

"Just one more big one, c'mon Eddie!" Dr. Geisner encouraged as Jamie sat behind his wife on the bed once more, holding her up and begging her to keep trying. She had been pushing hard for more than a half hour, and the baby wasn't budging. The contractions were overlapping now, and she just didn't have any strength left it seemed.

"I can't!" she cried weakly through the oxygen mask as she let her head fall back against Jamie's chest. She was drenched in sweat and shaking like a leaf from her efforts. "It's too hard! I can't do it!"

"You have to, Eddie," he pleaded with her as he held her tight. "You're strong. You can do this! I know you can... you have to!" he said with desperation as he looked up and met the doctor's eyes. "Q-tip number four… let's try combat breathing," he tried to fall back on the things he had been taught in an effort to help her. "In for four seconds… one… two… three… four... and out for four seconds…"

"I have a better idea, Harvard!… _You_ do this!"

"Mr. Reagan, I'm afraid we're going to have to reconsider a c-section," Dr. Geisner said as she shook her head. "The baby is starting to show signs of distress and your wife is just too exhausted. Her contractions are not productive enough. We can't wait much longer."

"NO! Are you freaking kidding me? After all this?" Eddie rallied suddenly at the thought of their munchie being taken from her that way. "Are all of you Reagans always this stubborn? Tell your kid to get out of there right now!" she cried as she pulled on Jamie's arm.

"One more time," she huffed as she sat back up determinedly. "Just give me one more chance!"

Knowing that the child was at risk, Eddie reached deep and somehow found the strength to continue for another few minutes. After one final push, it was over… the baby was out, and Dr. Geisner was moving quickly to clamp and sever the cord without asking Jamie if he wanted the honor, and what was worse was the silence that followed as the preoccupied doctor whisked the silent infant over to the warmer at the side of the room and continued to work in hushed tones with one of the NICU attendings.

"Why isn't she crying? GOD, JAMIE! Is it her lungs?" Eddie begged even as she collapsed back against him, unable to even open her eyes anymore. She had given absolutely everything she had and was completely spent. "NO! NO! MY BABY! Please tell me it's not that! What's wrong with her?!"

"She's… she's…" he continued to stutter in shock as if all the breath had been sucked out of him by a sucker punch to the gut. "Ed," he managed to swallow and rasp out finally as his brain wrapped itself around precisely what he had seen before the first little cries of their beloved bean were heard right as the clock ticked 12:10 on May 15th, the exact anniversary of Joe's death, and the two new parents suddenly went weak like newborn kittens at the sound as all was put right with the Reagan world…

Almost.

"She's… I mean she's _not_ … she's not... a... she," he huffed as tears of joy began to fall and he could not suppress the urge that came over him to giggle like a man possessed after months of stress and heartache as he felt his late brother's practical jokester hand in this colossal karmic twist and gave thanks for his palpable presence in the room. Joe had indeed given him a sign and a way to mend an essential bridge.

"WHAT? WAIT, WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?! JAMIE, WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING?!"

"Because she's a… she's a…"

"Beautiful and healthy little boy," Dr. Geisner confirmed as she turned around with a wide insider's grin since she had known the truth all along these many months, having guessed that her once inept intern had been the root of it by disclosing something she shouldn't have at a date much too early to be reliable, but had been expressly forbidden to reveal anything by that big red note on Eddie's folder. "And here _he_ is," she announced with emphasis while she returned to the bedside with a slightly cleaner-looking, squirming and wailing little smush-faced bundle in a blue hat who was having no problem whatsoever in finding his Irish/Serbian/Hungarian voice at full volume. "Now, he is premature and a bit smaller as we expected, so he'll have to stay here in the NICU to be monitored for a week or two, and we'll have to check and watch his kidneys very carefully over the next few months, but there's plenty of time for that and just listen to that set of lungs," the doctor assured the still-shocked couple who stared back slack-jawed at their unexpected but already fiercely loved son. "Not a thing wrong with them."

"OH!... OH... MY GOD! Jamie… LOOK!... She's… I mean _he's_... so perfect... my sweet, handsome little man... hello!" Eddie cried with a hyperventilating deep sob as she finally began to catch on while all the pain of the past hours of labor and months of worry melted away and all other expectations were instantly forgotten as her eyes filled with the brimming emotion of a new unconditional bond, and her most precious long-awaited munchie was laid on her chest for the first time.

"I guess now we know why everyone kept saying he looked like Joe and me on all those ultrasounds," Jamie kidded and settled in by her side, pausing to hide the telltale blue hat behind his hand for a selfie with the new addition to share with the family before they pulled the soft fabric back and started to explore their baby's tiny little body with loving gentle touches as they soaked in every detail about him and welcomed him into the family. "Ten fingers and toes," he counted in the rhythm of a nursery song his mother used to sing to him. "Two ears, two eyes, and a little nose... Kinda glad now it turned out this way, lambchop," he admitted softly as he kissed the side of her damp forehead. "I wanted to be surprised all along."

"Me too," Eddie murmured as her little one began to kick and cry harder and she quickly covered him back up with his blanket to keep him snuggly warm and secure.

"It's okay… shhhh… oh, please don't be scared, baby. I'm your mommy, and this is your daddy… you're so lucky because he's the very best one you could ever, ever have… and you have a big sister named Kaylin and three grandpas and a nagyanya to spoil you rotten and aunts and uncles and cousins, and we will all always love you so very, very much," she trailed off before looking up at her husband in wonder as he continued to stare back with a heart that was exploding with pride at the sight of his beautiful wife and son together.

"Eddie, you did it! I can't believe it… our baby is here! He's so incredible..."

"Jamison, I… I don't know what to call him!" she laughed through the overwhelming euphoria. "All this time we thought… I mean we didn't even pick out a boy's name!"

"I know," he grinned as he leaned over to kiss them both again, a tiny little hand now gripping his pinky tightly with assuring strength. "But I think I have the perfect one."

* * *

 _Ah, so I considered making that an evil cliffy there and cutting things off before we knew the baby was okay, but maybe I'm getting soft… in the spirit of Christmas as I am writing this, I thought that would be too cruel, especially as we are wrapping up this long, windy installment. So, two more chapters to go next week on Tues/Thurs as we bring the family into it and finish merging with the end of the original "Resurrection."_


	108. Chapter 108

_Hmm... seems the FF gremlins are about and this chapter disappeared after being up for a few hours, so reposting. :/_

* * *

Chapter 108

Frank Reagan had taken to pacing for the last hour or so, ever since Linda had come out from checking in the back and informed them that Eddie was about ready to push. They had listened three times this evening now while the soft lullaby music had come over the speakers indicating another baby had been born, but so far there had been no news on what was expected to be little Margaret Katalin's early arrival into this world. That wasn't the only thing that had the ordinarily stoic father restless. He paused to look at the clock. Midnight on May 15th. Just ten clicks before that awful moment in the alley where Joe had been taken from them while he was alone. His middle boy… the jokester, the peacekeeper. Ten clicks would mark the anniversary of another full year he had been gone. Every Reagan felt that time imprinted in their heart with each passing date. Tonight though, maybe there would be another special event that might soften the annual blow.

Henry watched his son follow an all too familiar routine as he performed the same loop he had when Jamie was being born... down the hall to the elevator door, back up to the opposite side, return to the right and pause to stare at the double doors for no more than twelve seconds before repeating the action. Once again, as he had done long ago, he stepped in the way and pulled his son over to the chairs.

"Francis, sit," he ordered.

Unlike back then, when they had prayed together for Mary and her baby, this time they were not alone. The private area afforded the Police Commissioner had slowly filled to near capacity during the day as each member of the Reagan family and a few honorary additions arrived in anticipation of the big event. Unable to stay awake, Kaylin was now sound asleep on the small couch with her head on Erin's lap and Nicki's jacket covering her as they waited for news. Linda and Danny were sitting in the far corner holding hands and whispering about what this would be like for them in a few more weeks as the boys likewise dozed off. Even Quincy remained loyal to the cause and had stayed to see this out while sequestered off to the side near the hallway, not wishing to intrude and having been joined by Annabel after her shift. Frank now found himself seated in the only remaining chair, which happened to be next to Eva, who waited nervously for news on her daughter.

"She'll be fine," he offered as he laid his big hand on top of hers. "You've raised a wonderful, strong woman. I've come to love her like one of my own. She'll be able to face whatever is needed. You should be proud of her."

"I am already as you say, and thank you for that, Frank," the older Janko woman conceded. "We have found each other again, and I am glad that she also has the same in your son… he is her true love and a very good férj és apa… husband and father. I have seen it. I just want for them never to feel the loss that we both know," she continued to worry about the baby and young couple once more given their combined past experiences.

"We do share that," he agreed with a sad nod. "I've been praying for my Mary to keep them safe as well. She was a force to be reckoned with when it came to her children, especially Jamie… If she is with them tonight, and I know she is… we can relax and just wait to spoil another grandchild. She'll see them through this."

"I hope you're right, Frank," Eva admitted with a small smile. "Again, thank you for that. It is hard to face this alone… Armin, for all his faults, was better like that than I am at these times. I just wish there was news..."

Just then, the haunting lullaby tones came over the speaker once more. All the Reagans and Eva stood up together and looked at the clock. 12:10. "Do you think it could have been?" Erin whispered tearfully.

"Had to be," Danny muttered. "There's no one else. Linda said Eddie's the only one left back there in active labor right now."

"Please, please God, let them be alright," Eva found herself uncharacteristically praying out loud. Frank's hand remained on hers, and he gave it another small squeeze. A few minutes passed, and his phone buzzed in his pocket. Caught up in the moment, he almost ignored it, but when he pulled it out and looked down a big smile crossed his face. Jamie had taken a selfie of himself and Eddie with a newborn baby laying across her chest covered loosely from head to toe with a blanket.

 _"Hi, Grandpa! I'm here!"_ it read. _"everything ok. b out in a few."_

"Oh my gosh!" Erin squealed as she took the phone and passed it down the line. "She looks just like Jamie did when he was born!"

"She does, doesn't she? Spitting image of him," Danny noted with a curious, raised eyebrow as he reached over to see and recalled that day so long ago when he first saw his baby brother in his mother's arms. "Poor kid… WHAT?" he added in exasperation as his wife slapped his arm hard for that comment. "I mean for a girl I thought she'd be a lot more like Eddie than him, especially considering that name they picked!"

"Aw, stop, and little Maggie Reagan… it fits her perfectly. I think she's just beautiful!" Linda gushed as she took a turn and looked at the photo, her heart clenching with the hope that soon she would be able to experience the very same thing as she had always been set on having a daughter. "Look at that… she's even going to have gorgeous wavy blonde hair!" she pointed to the little, wet ringlets visible.

"You're right, Aunt Linda," Nicki agreed as she looked over her shoulder. "Definitely gonna be a heartbreaker, even if she's a tiny one… just like our sweetness!" she lifted a groggy Kaylin up to see even though the little girl was still rubbing her eyes and not yet fully awake enough to catch on to what was happening. "Look! It's your baby sissy!"

"No boys until they're both thirty," Frank replied as he reached for his sleepy granddaughter and took her to his shoulder instead with a heavy, satisfied sigh when she laid her head down and wrapped her arms around his neck as suddenly all was right with the world. At that very moment, he decided finally to give in on another long-held conviction of his to guarantee that his grandbabies stayed close to him. "Right, sweetheart? Grandpa will make sure of that. Besides, all that matters is that everyone's okay," he smiled at Eva and breathed in relief.

"Well," Henry countered as he adjusted his glasses. "I think she has Eddie's eyes."

"Pop, the baby's eyes are closed in that picture!" Frank huffed. The whole family was laughing and eagerly awaiting their first up-close glimpse of the latest member for another twenty minutes before a door down the hall opened, and Jamie emerged, carefully carrying a small bundle in his arms while he was limping only slightly down the corridor _without_ his crutches… the first such time in many months he was walking proudly on his own and smiling through the tears as he approached.

"Look at that, Annie!" Quincy grinned as he got to his feet not realizing they had inadvertently positioned themselves as first in the receiving line, a temporary prosthesis likewise allowing him to stand on his own while a high-tech one was being fabricated for him courtesy of the tireless fundraising efforts of none other than the feisty redheaded young woman at his side. "You did it! OOH-RAH Ice! I'm so proud of you!" he clapped his friend on the shoulder to congratulate him on more than just the newborn in his arms as they were immediately surrounded by the rest of the family.

"Congratulations, Sarge… I mean, Jamie," Annabel was also smiling while taking a quick peek at the baby but feeling out of place as she knew everyone else was anxious to see. "She's so beautiful! But we should be going Quince," she tugged at his arm. "We're in the way… this is family time."

"Right… I just wanted to see this through," he acknowledged. "We'll go now."

"No, please stay," Jamie urged them as he stopped and carefully shifted his precious bundle around so he could be properly introduced to everyone else. "I couldn't have made it this far without you… you are part of my family now. I just wish Rigs could be here too," he referenced the Commander who was still receiving intensive treatment upstate for late-stage bone cancer, but by all accounts, was beating the odds with stubborn resilience once more.

"Besides, this little guy's gonna need all the uncles he can get," he added softly with forgiveness evident as he took his first direct look at Danny's eyes in months.

"HE?! Wait, what? You mean..." Erin still puzzled in confusion before being the first to catch on as her younger brother pulled back the blanket, and the big reveal was made. "OH! There's a blue hat!" she huffed and looked up for confirmation as he nodded with a laugh. "Jamie! Were we wrong all this time? It's a BOY?!"

"Yep… everyone," Jamie started with a raspy, emotional voice as he stood and looked around at all the expectant faces, pausing to take a deep breath. "A little early and not quite what we were expecting, but more than we ever hoped for… he's here. I'd like you all to meet my son... Joseph Daniel Reagan, four pounds, twelve ounces and seventeen inches even. Born at 12:10 on May 15th, the exact anniversary of Joe's death." He was shaking as he looked at his older brother and added quietly, "He's still with us, Dan… he always knew how to bring us back together. I asked him for a sign tonight, and I got this," he choked back. "Tell me that's not…"

"A classic Joey C. Reagan practical joke," Danny grinned as he closed his eyes and laughed while shaking his head in relief at what had passed between them… there would still be a difficult conversation to be had, but for the first time in many weeks, he was sure they would be able eventually to put what happened to rest in the past where it belonged… that wall was coming down again, courtesy once more of a peacekeeping middle brother whose spirit was palpable now. "He's still got it. No one could ever top him… not even now. I can just see him up there coaching the kid to cover up just to mess with you. Thanks, bro… I owe you," he breathed to himself with a glance upwards.

"And Edit?" Eva asked in a small voice. "How is she?"

Jamie's eyes were filled with relief for his wife as he looked over and squeezed Eva's arm. "She's doing okay now. It was a little hard on her at the end, but they're finishing up what they need to do and will be putting her back in the room in a few minutes. Dr. Geisner said everything is fine. She's tired, but I'll take you back when she's ready. She's been asking for you."

"Köszönöm a mennyeket," Eva sighed as she reached over and gave Jamie a heartfelt hug and kiss on the cheek as she put her hand on the baby's blanket. "Welcome my unokája… mindig szeretni fogsz, kicsit… you will always be loved, little one, and thank you for being there for her, Jamison," she added softly.

"He's so small," Nicki observed as she reached out to touch a tiny hand before a prepared and proactive nurse Linda shooed her away and followed up by passing around the hand sanitizer from the wall station while warning everyone else off even after they had used it. "Is he really okay?"

"Yes, and don't worry, but Dr. Geisner said that even though everything looks good right now, and it was okay for me to bring him out here, he's gonna have to go up to the NICU in a few minutes and stay there for a while, maybe even a week or more… You won't be able to visit often since they worry about infections, especially in preemies, so they're pretty strict about just allowing the parents in; grandparents can come once a day," Jamie warned. "It's nothing major… because of his size and the stress he was under the neonatologist just wants to run some tests and keep him monitored. They need to make sure his kidneys and lungs are functioning okay and that he's starting to gain some weight before he can come home with us."

"Oh, Jamie, he'll be there before you know it," Frank choked through his tears as his remaining boys reconnected while he stared down at the baby who was just stirring now. He thought back to the wonder of the moment when he had first laid eyes on each of his children. "What a fine-looking boy. I'm so happy for you, son," he said as he reached over and pulled his shoulder over for a hug and a firm kiss on the side of his head as the sight of his youngest standing there strong and whole while holding his own was overwhelming. "Well done," he whispered.

"Yes, and it will give Kaylin and I time to repaint the room," Eva ruffled pragmatically at the thought of the bright pink state of her grandson's home nursery, not to mention the completely inappropriate wardrobe that was waiting. "I will not allow ez a kisfiú to be brought into it the way it is now! It is good that the shower was canceled or there would be more work to do!"

"So, Daniel, eh?" Danny smirked as he tried to contain his own tears. He hated being so emotional in front of others, but there was no hiding it this time. Jamie's announcement had touched him at the core. "You sure you want to do that?"

"Yeah, I do," Jamie turned back to his brother. "It was the only thing that felt right, you know? After all that we went through…" He paused and blinked a few times. "Danny… are you crying tough man?" he asked with amusement.

"Nah, just the bright lights in here," his older brother shrugged as he sniffled and wiped his eyes. "Now let me hold that kid… I'll be careful, no touching!" he assured his hovering wife. "If he's gonna have my name there's some things we need to talk about, man to man… plus I gotta get used to this again, anyway, right?" he added with a happy glance at Linda, one that did not go unnoticed by his oldest son who even now at this moment continued to sulk and hold strong reservations against his parents' plan. "Gonna have another one of my own coming soon, but I bet mine's bigger," he added tauntingly as the sibling rivalry renewed.

"You're sure?"

"What did I just say, Harvard?" Danny griped as he carefully accepted the soft bundle from his brother. "Hey, buddy… God, he's so small," he whispered in amazement as he stared into the same face that his two brothers had shared. It was like stepping back in time to that morning when his grandfather had taken him to the hospital with Erin and Joey to meet their youngest brother. Just then the baby let out a strong wail, and everyone laughed.

"And so, the streak continues… each one he touches. Linda, you need to be ready for that again too," Henry smiled as he gripped Danny's shoulders. "That's one good-looking young man," he added with misty eyes himself. "Must take after me."

"Daddy?" Kaylin's small voice piped up from Frank's shoulder. The baby's cry had finally woken her. "Where's Mommy?" she asked sleepily, as she sat up rubbing her eyes. "Did my baby sister get born yet?"

"Mommy's just fine, sweetness," Jamie said as he walked over and took her from his father's arms. "We'll go see her in a few minutes, and yes, the baby is finally here... but guess what? You got your wish! Come meet your brother. This is Joey," he added as he held her up to see.

"Did you have to give the girl baby back?" she puzzled as some of that insecurity from her own rough start in life was still evident. "Was she bad?"

"No, honey," everyone laughed. "Remember I told you that God gets to pick when Mommy has the baby? Well, this time he decided to send us a brother instead. The other doctor was wrong before, it was a boy baby in her tummy all along," he assured. "He fooled us just like your Uncle Joe used to with his jokes, so we gave him that name."

"Oh. Boy babies be better anyway," the little girl asserted happily, completely willing to accept that explanation and having been sure of that fact since the start. "Can I touch him?" she asked in awe.

"Of course," Jamie told her while remaining mindful of the fragile infant. "Very gently like this," he showed her as they stroked the baby's blanket softly.

"Oh, hi Joey," Kaylin giggled as she peered at her little brother in wonder while his eyes opened and they looked at each other for the very first time. "I'm your big sister. Mommy and Daddy say I'm gonna take such good care of you. I'll always make sure you're safe."

"Well that sure sounds like a Reagan, doesn't it?" Frank laughed as he took some photos of the moment. Today's date would most certainly have a different meaning for the entire family... something special to truly celebrate now.

* * *

 _Well, of course, we ended up with a baby Joseph Daniel Reagan after all that, because "boy babies be better anyway!" LOL. Someday there might just have to be a Margaret Katalin, but for now, big sister Kaylin gets her wish. I have to thank Laura Louisa Lewis for the added vision of Joe Reagan coaching the baby bean from beyond to hide his privates at just the right time in order to orchestrate the ultimate gotcha on his unsuspecting little brother._

 _Next, the **last** chapter before a planned break and a short epilogue to follow as our happy but exhausted new parents face the future and make some crucial decisions on where that might take them._


	109. Chapter 109

Chapter 109

"Good morning, sweetheart," Frank greeted his daughter-in-law warmly from the doorway of her room with a lovely spray of her favorite flowers in hand later that day after having taken leave to return home with the remainder of the family for several hours of restful sleep to recover from the exciting events of the previous night. "How are you feeling?"

"Oh, hey, Frank," Eddie replied as she quickly adjusted her housecoat for modesty to cover the now burgeoning breasts under her nightgown since they were primed for delivery again after a few rounds of pumping had kick-started them. She gingerly pushed herself up on the bed and clicked off the late morning news, having watched Nathaniel Pierce's live press conference exonerating her husband's actions and multiple replays afterward on the various channels to assure herself that part of their lives was truly over. "I'm a little sore, but fine otherwise now," she admitted with a nod to the television. "Jamie didn't want to see any part of that, so he's hiding out down the hall in the NICU feeding the baby."

"He's not trying to take over your job now too, is he?" Frank prodded carefully with a light smile, slightly concerned though as he knew it had been Eddie's plan to breastfeed as long as possible before returning to work. "Because I think he's lacking some basic equipment for that."

"No, we tried a couple of times, but Joey wasn't strong enough to latch on for very long or take enough with a bottle. It was too hard for him to juggle breathing and swallowing, so they had to put a feeding tube in through his little nose," she reported emotionally with great hurt and disappointment evident at that thought. "I can't nurse him yet, but at least he's still getting my milk. Dr. Ramsey's the neonatologist who's taking care of him. She said it should only be like that for a little while now that he's getting more nourishment than before, and then we can try again in a few days. It was a good thing he came last night, Frank," Eddie admitted sadly and wiped her eyes as they teared up and ran over. "I wanted to try to put the labor off as long as I could and wait for Jamie to be here, but everyone else was right… the baby was stressed, and they said things were starting to fail around him, so he would have been a lot weaker if we did that… or worse," she added with a hitch in her voice over that possible outcome.

"Well, then, it's good that's all over with now… the rest will come soon too," her father-in-law encouraged. "And probably faster than you think. If there's one thing a Reagan knows how to do, it's eat and drink," he tried to cheer her as she was still obviously harboring some guilt over the baby's condition. "You did your best and afforded him every chance, sweetheart. That's all a mother can do; the rest is out of our hands. He'll be fine."

"I know, but tomorrow I'll go home, and he'll have to stay, maybe for longer than we thought," she added wistfully before sniffling again with a surge of hormonal angst at the notion of her munchie being alone here for any length of time without her. "I just never realized before how hard that would be. I hate even leaving him for a little while. I was up there for a few hours, but Jamie made me come back and rest for now. I can't even imagine what he felt like when he thought he was going to miss everything."

"And how is papa?" Frank asked to deflect her focus, knowing that it had also been a tumultuous twenty-four-hour emotional rollercoaster ride for his son… and with what he was about to reveal there were still a few more nervy twists and turns to come, not the least of which was contained in an official letter hidden in the breast pocket of his suit.

"Over the moon," Eddie finally smiled brightly as she thought about her proud husband. "He hasn't slept all night. Don't get me wrong, he would have absolutely loved a little girl too, but a son… he's sooo happy to have that connection to Joe, and I'm glad that's what brought him and Danny back together again, at least for the next six months," she added with a sigh. "He's agreed to stay here that long and try to find a job," she explained. "I hope after what Pierce said this morning that he'll get his license back soon and be able to go on some interviews. All he's worried about is providing for us now, and he really needs to feel like he's doing that again."

"As a corporate lawyer?" Frank assumed as he rocked back on his heels, trying to keep a straight face before delivering some news he hoped would relieve the young couple's anxiety over their future and guarantee at least two of his grandchildren would stay within walking distance of his own home for the foreseeable future.

"Yeah, of course… unless the FBI reinstates their offer, but I hope that doesn't happen either," she confided anxiously with a nervous look behind him to make sure her husband didn't hear. "I told him I really want to stay here."

"Well then, I'll let you in on a little secret or two," he revealed with a smile as he stepped closer to hand over the flowers and whisper a few things in her ear.

###

"Okay, little man… we're doing good here," Jamie encouraged his tiny son as he carefully picked him up to hold to his chest after the nurse capped off the tube that was taped to the side of Joey's cheek when the feeding was complete and helped arrange all the peripheral wires and various other things that were attached to him in order to constantly monitor his heart rate and oxygen levels.

"Now, let's try to keep all that yummy stuff down there in your tummy this time, okay, bud?" he added patiently even as the baby continued to gretz a bit after a few rounds of reflux had negated much of their prior efforts. Undeterred and now wearing a borrowed scrub top, he was prepared to stay as long as it took to make sure his son was properly fed at least once more before returning to check on his wife. "You have to get big and strong, so you can do this the right way and come home soon," he murmured as he leaned forward to take in the sweet baby smell and rocked very gently almost in place with his son tucked up under his chin to try and soothe him. "Your momma loves you so much, and she's gonna want a detailed sitrep about what happened here, so we don't want to get in trouble and say Daddy let her down, do we? 'Cause she's just the bestest," he cooed in singsong baby jibber jabber.

"You're both doing fine," Michelle, the experienced attending Peds nurse assured the dedicated new father with a smile. "Sometimes it just takes a little while to transition them… but once they get enough of that liquid gold," she referenced the rich breastmilk which had thankfully already come in for Eddie. "You can practically see them growing by the hour. All his other labs are good, and he only had a few mild periods of apnea and bradycardia overnight," she noted with a glance at the chart on her tablet. "Totally normal… just some a's and b's he'll grow out of soon."

"Easy for you to say," Jamie huffed as the thought that his premature son had stopped breathing, no matter how normal or short a period it was purported to be, was enough to raise the hair on the back of his neck and jumpstart his own heart, although a glance around at the other covered isolettes and their tiny, underage and compromised occupants with worried, hovering parents and staff over on the more intensive-care side of the unit was enough to put that in perspective. There had already been one critical event over there this morning, and he gave thanks that his wife had not been on hand to witness it or she would have never agreed to leave and get some rest. _Joey was just here for some monitoring and help with feeding,_ he reminded himself… a matter of a week or two they had been assured while many of those other babies were looking at months of intervention, surgeries, or worse with a lifetime of challenges ahead. Given the risks they had faced in Eddie's pregnancy, suddenly having an infant with such a manageable condition seemed like a gift from above.

"Looks like company's coming," Michelle interrupted his train of thought and nodded over to draw his attention to the entrance of the unit where a six-four, mustached and easily recognizable Police Commissioner in his customary three-piece suit could be seen attempting unsuccessfully to wrestle himself into one of those unyielding, supposedly one-size-fits-all yellow paper gowns without ripping it in half before being assisted into another, then put in a mask and lectured on proper hand washing skills and NICU etiquette by an amused aid. "Is that who I think it is?" the nurse asked, having just come on duty and not informed previously that there was blue-blooded royalty on her ward. "I should have guessed with the name, and I knew you looked familiar… you've been on the news all morning," she scolded.

"Yeah, and that's Grandpa," Jamie acknowledged with a sigh as their anonymity disappeared once more when Frank finally managed to pass inspection and was allowed to enter while Detective Nucifero remained posted outside. "You'll probably be seeing a lot of him while we're here... Hey, Pop," he greeted him.

"Jamison," Frank's eyes were obviously smiling with pride above his mask. "How's our boy doing?"

"Good, just trying to get the hang of things out here in the world," Jamie admitted as he gingerly brought the still-irritated little one down to face forward in his arms while being exceptionally careful to keep him upright and untangled as instructed.

"I spoke to Eddie already," his father reported as he looked on with amusement. "She told me about the feeding tube, but other than that she said they're both doing well. Count your blessings, son."

"Already have a hundred times," Jamie answered truthfully. "He's a little fussy, but do you want to try holding him?"

"Of course, that's why I'm here," Frank volunteered without fear or hesitation as he took a seat in the opposite chair, undaunted by the tubes and wires as he proudly welcomed his newest grandson into his arms for the first time. "Ah, and there he is… See? That's a good boy, Joseph," he assured as the baby immediately quieted at the sound of that deep, rumbling voice and showed obvious contentment in those experienced arms.

"Okay, so now how did you do that?" Jamie looked on in awe with more than a small amount of envy as he was being schooled. "I swear I was holding him the exact same way!"

"You can't be so nervous and tense up; babies can sense that... just ask your brother. Why do you think every little one he picks up cries? It's just like riding a bike, son… relax and it's an easy time. You were the same that first night when I held you. Besides, he's a Reagan, and we're tougher than we look. Here, take a picture of us," Frank ordered after handing over his previously disinfected phone while basking in total grandpa mode now.

"I hope you don't force everyone at 1PP to look at all these," Jamie joked in relief while scrolling through the photos that were already on the device after complying by taking a selfie of the three Reagan generations together.

"What? I can be proud, can't I? You have a beautiful family," his father commented as rocked the baby gently like the pro he was. Frank Reagan always had a special way with children and this time would be no different, plus there was still room on his lap for another that would hopefully follow soon.

"Yes," Jamie answered as he considered every person in his life who was now included under that umbrella. "Thank God for that."

"Pop and Eva will bring Kaylin over to visit once she's home from class; we couldn't talk her out of going. I'm sure she's the belle of the ball today as the newest big sister in the class."

"She loves that school and all her friends," Jamie agreed before moving the conversation over to something he'd been dwelling on all night. "Dad, I made a promise to Eddie we'll stay here, at least for now while I look for a job," he confessed. "But she's going to be on maternity leave for at least six weeks or more, and after all this, it might take me awhile to find something, so…"

"So, you were wondering if I could help you out a little," Frank looked up and instantly read the reluctant tone of his son's voice as if he was asking for an advance on his allowance.

"No," he replied evenly, much to Jamie's surprise.

"Huh? But why?" came the stutter at that unexpected reply.

"Because there won't be a need," his father declared with a directed look. "Chuck Miller called me this morning after Pierce's press conference… the one you avoided watching," he added pointedly. "There's a spot for you in Legal at 1PP," he declared. "And I want you to take it."

"What? No, Dad," Jamie shook his head. "That one was filled, and I'm looking for a short-term loan, not a big-time hook."

"No hook," Frank assured as he deftly took care of an irritating little gurgly burp and the aftermath with an experienced touch as he deftly settled the baby back down on his shoulder like a man with many years of experience doing just that under his belt. "This was all Chuck's idea. He's more than happy with that hire… says he does the work of two men, but now he has an opening in the Special Investigations Unit in the Criminal Section for a position as an FBI liaison, seems like one of his other associates has decided to leave and pursue a certain prosecutor's position being vacated up in Podunk County," he gruffed at Pierce's expected fate now that the case had fallen apart.

"You could always consider running for that if you really wanted to leave the department," he hedged with a chuckle. "Make all that publicity work since you're already a household name up there."

"Dad, I'm desperate… but it's not _that_ bad, at least not yet," Jamie declared as he nervously chewed his lip and looked between his father and son as he considered the ramifications—this offer could be the answer to his many prayers, but only if he could be assured it didn't look like blatant nepotism first.

"Well, Chuck is glad to be rid of him because there have always been issues dealing with the Feds on every single case he was assigned, so he feels it's time we have someone more qualified in the position that's dedicated to that," he smiled at the irony considering where his son's prospects had recently been. "Tell me who's more so than a certain person that was just involved in a successful sting with them like you were and was pegged to do that exact job in reverse for the federal government in Washington. Now I want you to talk to him, but what he's proposing here is a stepping stone that's down a pay grade from what you were offered before. So, it's more like a lateral move to where you were as a sergeant, but you'll keep your badge and time served, plus there's room above to grow, Jamie. I have no doubt you can move up the chain on your merit. Unfortunately, with the upcoming budget cuts, to make this work there has to be a few other concessions made and duties assigned, so that limits the interested takers..." he trailed off.

"Like what?" his son asked, now hooked and apparently interested, but still outwardly lukewarm to this news as he continued to consider where things stood.

"We're losing a couple of older instructors to attrition, and instead of replacing them both I need to hire one and get someone part-time to work with the recruits and cover a few of the classes at the academy next year… pretty lame stuff: search, and seizure, constitutional law, ethics, plus there's a temporary spot open for a tactical firearms assistant, but that one starts immediately, and I already offered it to Quincy," he revealed.

"You did?"

"Yes, because I needed someone quickly since the man I had was forced to retire early last week due to a health condition, and a sniper-trained, decorated Navy SEAL fit the bill perfectly," he explained. "Just like an experienced cop with a Harvard law degree who graduated first in every class he's been in since kindergarten would be a lock on an application for the other, even if his last name weren't Reagan. We don't get too many of those, you know, and it will be a real boost for the recruitment process."

"But, Dad, you never…" Jamie started before rolling his eyes. "It won't look like favoritism?"

"It's not a top spot in the office, and you'll have to work your way forward, but Chuck can't think of a more qualified candidate. It's ready whenever you are. Now it doesn't come will all the pay and perks of the FBI offer you had, but he wants to sign you to it before they come back looking again. I never wanted to show preference to one of my own," Frank admitted. "In this case, I'm not… in fact I'm being downright selfish by asking you to take a position you're overqualified for when I know in a few months you'd have your pick of any number of them with a higher salary and more prestige somewhere else," he finished and turned back to look down at his content grandson who was sleeping soundly in his patriarch's arms. "Stay, Jamie… it's with my blessing. You'll do good, satisfying work there, and I want to see this little one and Kaylin grow up. Sometimes family has to come first, and this is one of those times… you can start in a few weeks or a month after taking leave for this and to finish your rehab. Besides, I might have already mentioned some of this to Eddie," he admitted sheepishly while clearing his throat before adding a last defense. "Pop's idea."

"Figures," his son smirked with a shake of his head as he conceded, already knowing that his wife would be a hundred percent behind this plan and it was now useless to resist. "That was a dirty move. So, all this was for show, and it's a done deal already?"

"More or less," Frank shrugged. "I learned from the best," he admitted with a smile. "There's just one more thing," he added as he pushed the paper gown away and reached into his pocket for that envelope with great hesitation since his first point of order had already been secured, and there was a loose string in this whole odyssey that had just popped up and needed to be dealt with. "Now don't get upset," he warned while handing it over. "This was delivered to the house this morning under my name, so I opened it, but it's meant for you."

"What is it?" Jamie puzzled as he took the letter addressed from an attorney's office in Virginia he didn't recognize before pulling out the enclosed paperwork and scanning it for several moments in disbelief. "You've got to be kidding me!" he seethed quietly by the end, muffling his voice given their current location and company as he looked up at his father's eyes in disbelief. "Is this a joke?" he hissed.

"No, son," Frank kept his tone light and even for the tiny ears present even though he had initially cursed Mason Malevsky's name up and down in such a vehement manner when he read it for himself that it had brought a worried Henry hurrying into his office from the kitchen earlier that morning thinking that something had happened to Eddie or the baby. Frank knew this was one of those tipping moments just like what Danny had faced where the outcome of his son's mental health was in jeopardy, and he hoped that having Jamie address it here with his newborn baby on hand would keep things in perspective.

"I already called to verify it. Mason's will was probated," he continued as if Jamie hadn't already figured that out. "After your accident he had it revised and left nothing at all to Matthew, which of course is telling and none of our concern, except for…"

"The damn Chevelle," his son surmised as he covered his face with his hands and pressed his eyes hard enough to see stars wondering just how long Malevsky's grip would continue to affect his life. "Me… he turned the title over to me!... Why?!"

"Insurance," Frank concluded. "If things didn't work out in his favor he used this as one last jab at controlling us... even had it mailed to me so I would know exactly what he was doing. That bast- uh, duckie, really knew how to…" he paused to clear his throat and tried to keep himself from continuing on that line of thought in front of the baby while considering just how deep Mason's diabolical psychological manipulation cut.

"I don't want it! I know it was yours and Joe's, but I never want to see that thing again, Dad!" Jamie was shaking his head as his chest tightened up at just the thought and he resisted the urge to ball up as his older brother had once pointed out since any mention of that car would cause him to do so before. "Not after what it almost took from me! I still have nightmares!"

"I understand, but if there's anything I've learned from what Danny went through, it's that something like this has to be dealt with, and soon," his father advised before adding another layer of contention. "Not to mention it's been in an impound lot since that night racking up fees to the tune of several thousand dollars over the past two-and-a-half months and adding almost $30 to that total every day it sits there. And now you're…"

"Responsible for it!" Jamie boiled as that was absolutely the last thing he needed on his emotional or financial plate at this time. "That son of a… _duckie!"_ he cursed in g-rated fashion in front of his lost sibling's tiny namesake as he paused to wonder what Joe would have wanted… his beloved brother had poured his heart and soul into that car at one point, but right now even that wasn't enough to overcome the negative feelings he held for it.

"I'll junk it again," he vowed.

"Then Mason wins because that will haunt you forever," Frank insisted. "It's something you should have the chance to face when you're ready… and that doesn't have to be right now, but don't do anything you might regret without giving it some time. I'll put it under a cover in my garage," he offered, neglecting to mention the fact that from what he was told the interior itself needed to be cleaned and detailed given the state Mason was in during that last drive. "If in six months or so you still feel that way, I'll take it somewhere myself and have it crushed down to the size of a soup can in front of me. It's your call, Jamie…" he trailed off and prayed that his son would make the right choice.

###

"So, we're keeping it then?" Eddie prodded as she turned her attention to the question of what to do with the Chevelle while her husband was climbing in next to her on the bed for a nap after he had first painstakingly informed her of every single detail about baby Joseph's progress over the last few hours. It was necessary for the doctors to perform their rounds and required procedures, so all visitors had been asked to step out of the unit for the time being. Jamie promised he had left their son sleeping contently with a tummy full of a second feeding, so after a long, stressful night was looking for much of the same at that very moment although he accepted it would come at the expense of another chitchat first.

"Dad's keeping it," he corrected, yawning as his heavy head hit the pillow and he took his father's advice to allow himself to push that aspect completely away for now, simply too tired and unwilling to deal with it as he snuggled in by her side. "I've got more important things to worry about."

"Like your new job?" she poked back optimistically, already aware that he had agreed to take the position after speaking personally to DCLM Miller, but hopeful that it was something he would find as positive and fulfilling as his career as a beat cop had once been for him.

"Like you and the kids… you're the only things that matter to me," Jamie answered instead while reaching up softly to plant a kiss on her cheek before finally giving in and letting her know that he was completely on board with it. "It's all good, Edit Katalin," he admitted with a smile as he closed his eyes. "All of it."

"Really, Jamison?"

"Yeah, we'll get to stay here with the family in our house and I'll have the chance to train some new rookies coming out of the academy, plus I'll be doing a lot of fieldwork coordinating ops with the local agents, so it's not all behind a desk," came the answer which sounded encouraging to her. "You can still work on your gold shield, and I might even get to boss Danny around on a few assignments," he added and snickered at the thought. "He'll love that."

"So, everything's okay now?"

"It's better than okay, lambchop… it's perfect," he assured honestly before they cuddled in next to one another and a peaceful sleep claimed them both for a few hours until their full and busy lives could begin again.

* * *

 _There, ta-da! It's… DONE! Well, *almost*… I'll still have an epilogue to add in a few weeks' time, but *insert happy dance* THANK YOU to everyone that made it this far, especially my loyal reviewers who brighten my day whenever that little email notification ding comes in. I know this was a very long, windy one that was tough to follow at times, but all of these stories seem to take on a life of their own in my head, and that's where this one traveled._

 _Now, a planned break here for the start of a new but continuing 20+ chapter story entitled "Where the Heart Lies" which will begin posting immediately on the same Tues/Thurs schedule. It's set about a month from this point to round out where the characters wound up while recounting Henry and Betty Reagan's lives together in Bay Ridge, their loss of Peter Christopher, as well as Frank's early years through meeting Mary, their courtship and marriage, the start of his NYPD career and the births of their children. It might even give us a glimpse at the latest baby OC as the Staten Island family branch looks to expand. Then it will be back to close this one, and Series II out with a multi-chapter epilogue called "I See Fire" as Danny and Jamie finally get their closure, and we say goodbye to a few favorite characters._

 _*Spoiler Alert* definitely need some tissues for these upcoming "werks" although I had the most fun ever writing for Betty's character! Hope you enjoy her story too! I think "Heart" has become my all-time favorite so far!_

 _Please drop a review if you can, and thanks until next time!_


	110. Epilogue: I See Fire – Part I

Epilogue: I See Fire – Part I

 _Oh, misty eye of the mountain below  
_ _Keep careful watch of my brothers' souls  
_ _And should the sky be filled with fire and smoke  
_ _Keep watching over Durin's sons…_

The echo of the rifle volley had barely rolled away through the warm, humid, summer air cloaking the nearby hills before it was joined by the sad, hanging notes of the bugler's rendition of Taps. Jamie's jaw clenched and unclenched in an effort to contain his emotions on this trying Tuesday morning at Arlington National Cemetery as Commander Joel Rigsby was laid to rest among his countless peers, a valiant fight against the ravages of late-stage bone cancer having claimed his spirit just over a fortnight earlier.

The Reagan family was well-represented within the exceptionally orderly assembly of mourners paying their respects, with Frank, Henry, Danny, Jack, Sean, Erin, and Nicki also in attendance, the latter of that group only begrudgingly so, having tried initially to beg off with the excuse of needing to attend a vital summer college class at Columbia. Despite receiving permission from her mother, that notion had been squashed by a patriarch who was determined to use this event as a tool to show his sometimes too-far-left-leaning granddaughter a lesson about the scope of sacrifice that was represented here beneath the unending rows of white stones by giving her a tour of those he knew personally. The only exception had been made of course for the newest member of the clan, little Kitty Elise Beale, who, at the tender age of just over two weeks, was excused from today's proceedings and had stayed back in Staten Island with her happy but still adjusting "Aunt" Linda.

Although faced with virtually the same challenge, Eddie had steadfastly refused any suggestion that she likewise remain at home with six-week-old baby Joseph, instead of making the more than four-hour drive to the hallowed ground in Virginia to support her husband. To lessen the stress of traveling with two young children, the couple decided to arrive a day early and stay a few nights locally. During the official ceremony, however, she thought it was probably best to stand back at a distance under the shade of nearby trees and away from the main group of mourners especially since as she feared the infant began to fuss somewhat at the sudden sharp noises during this last part despite a set of precautionary ear muffs.

Instead of worrying about the slight distraction amid the otherwise formal, resounding silence that enveloped them after the echoes died away, Jamie welcomed those soft sounds behind from his son and focused on them and the fact Kaylin's arms were tightly wrapped around his nearly healed right leg. A precocious child, he was aware she had cause to understand more than most four-year-olds should from experience, and with the ceremony drawing to a close, he gathered her up to his shoulder for reassurance. Together they solemnly observed the proceedings just as she had for her own mother's funeral while the final, gut-wrenching scene played out before them as the flag covering Rigs' coffin was meticulously folded by gloved, white hands and presented to a sharply dressed and postured Quincy who accepted it as the Commander's sole family representative.

Soon the formalities were over, and the cemetery agent announced that the service had concluded as the casket team took their leave and moved on to their next scheduled sad task while the group assembled for Rigs paid him one last heed in single file before likewise fading off for a few hours. In addition to the graveside services, there was to be a break in the afternoon itinerary to allow for individual tours of the memorials followed by a smaller, more intimate re-gathering to attend the Sunset Parade, an hour-long Marine Corps drum and bugle concert on the grounds. Finally, Frank himself had stepped in to help Quincy by pulling a few strings to open up a private section of the nearby, historical Taps Room restaurant for a memorial dinner and toast to the Commander for his closest friends.

Jamie shifted Kaylin in his arms and straightened out her pretty, navy blue polka-dotted crinkle chiffon draped dress topped by a charming sunflower straw hat as she sat on his hip and helped lay two single-stemmed flowers on the casket before moving past after a pause for a prayer and word of thanks as the rest of his family fell in step behind him. It was a struggle saying that final goodbye, but he managed to keep his own emotions firmly knotted up in his throat while purposefully giving Quincy space after a firm handshake as his friend stood solidly with Annabel on his arm among his former colleagues who had made the trip to honor their fallen Commander, receiving both condolences and congratulations on the progress he'd made from those who knew what an accomplishment that was.

"Haven't been to one of these with this much brass in a while," Henry remarked after a pause to nod to the many high-ranking officers in attendance and wipe his glasses as the Reagans gathered together near the road and Eddie came up to rejoin them. "Those boys put on a damn fine service," he added as Erin slipped her arm around his, concerned that the heat might be affecting her grandfather after his heart scare and pacemaker procedure a few weeks before.

"Pop, maybe you should go sit down in the car and get some air," she worried. "It's too hot for you to be walking around today."

"I feel fine, sweetheart," he assured with a look around the innumerable headstones surrounding them. "I have some old friends to visit. Don't worry, it's not my time to pick out one of these yet."

"So, Quince was right; from the stories I heard this morning while we were waiting, Rigs was the real deal," Jamie wistfully admitted as he glanced around behind him at the casket once more, before Eddie came up to his side and he slipped his free arm around her shoulder with a grateful kiss to her forehead and turned away for the last time. "Rick and Kenzie introduced us to a bunch of them. More than half these guys said they're only here today because he saved their lives in the first place. I guess I was pretty lucky to meet him when I did."

"Yes, you were," Frank agreed as he looked at his youngest son and family with great satisfaction considering the challenges of the last six months. There were now two new grandbabies to cuddle and love on, and despite the stress of the accident, house arrest, gaining a premature son, changing jobs, followed by Henry's collapse and losing his friend within a month's time, Jamie appeared to be adapting reasonably well to the recent upheavals in his life on both the physical and emotional fronts—maybe more so than Danny who still always seemed to regret having left something unsaid whenever his brother turned away from him.

"And we'll all be forever thankful that you did," his father continued. "He taught you a lot in a short time, didn't he?"

"Yes, sir," Jamie answered truthfully although with a heavy sigh and still a bit of a lost look about him again that bothered Frank though. It would just take a while before his son found the right footing and that disappeared too, he reasoned. While there were many new things to be excited about including the tiny little boy being held protectively in Eddie's arms, the move to 1PP had effectively severed Jamie's daily contact with many friends on the street, including Renzulli. That coupled with the loss of Rigs as well as Rick Fellows who had been forced into retirement from the FDNY and had moved to Arizona to start things anew with Kenzie, was still proving to be a tough to pill to swallow. Their collective loss was forcing him once more to look for a mentor in his life. While he appreciated his immediate superior, DCLM Miller, the connection was more just that—boss to subordinate, and less a role of an advisor to a student. Frank knew his youngest had always searched for a guide in his life from the earliest age—in the beginning, and for the longest time that was Joe, then Renzulli, Rick, and finally Rigs. Now would be a good time for another older brother to step into that role, but despite everything they had been through together recently and the shared experience of new fatherhood, there still seemed to be something in the way between them which was once again evident as Danny and his boys joined the group, having arrived late to the proceedings by his normal 15-minute span and therefore relegated to the back of the line.

"So, what's the plan?" the eldest Reagan sibling asked after inconspicuously trying to wipe the corner of his eye and maintain his tough guy image. "Nicki said there's some kind of map and Pop told her we're on a schedule," he added while fingering a few, precious mementos in his pocket from three young men in particular who were buried in this ground and deserved a personal visit and more than a few offered prayers and words of thanks. Because of Malevsky's interference, Danny now found himself more or less obliged to find some way to honor his fallen platoon mates later this year on the fifteenth anniversary of their deaths given the promises made to their families, but he had yet to settle on a good way to do that. With Jack's begrudgingly offered cinematography help, he had decided to at least use this day to procure some pictures and video that could be edited together and sent to Jimmy Beale's wife in New York and the parents of Michael McClaine and Steven Feltz in Tennessee and Kentucky respectfully in an effort to allow them to more easily view their loved one's resting places remotely, but beyond that he was stumped.

"Oh, well, Erin and Nicki are coming with us after we all stop and pay our respects to Gerry over there," Henry corrected and nodded to a not-too-distant hillside where the remains of Frank's childhood friend and fellow Marine, were interred.

"We all owe him a visit together as a family. After that, I figured it would be better to split up, so you could go your own way with the boys. The grave sites are spread out, and it's going to be hot as Hades here in another hour or so."

"Everyone's invited back to our hotel for the afternoon," Eddie interjected as she fanned Joey's face with the memorial program as he was snuggled close in a lightweight baby wrap while the two remained shaded under her big floppy hat. "We have a suite, and at least it's cooler in there. I won't be able to keep the baby out in this much longer… we have to be really careful he stays hydrated until he outgrows his kidney issues."

"Then we should get going," Jamie decisively offered as he began to move forward; his still somewhat-fragile, premature son's well-being immediately taking precedence over his own need to mourn Rigs as the Commander would have wanted in the end, anyway. He turned away from the fresh grave before taking her hand and the lead in a short procession on a direct path to Gerry's marker which was quickly located in an older section of the cemetery a few hundred yards south.

The plain white stone was only adorned with the outline of a small cross followed by the name of Fitzgerald M. McLaughlin over the revered insignia and the words designating "Medal of Honor, US Marine Corps, PFC, Vietnam," on separate lines followed by the dates of his birth and death.

Frank's eyes misted over at the sight of Gerry's entire life summed up in a brief etching and emotion uncharacteristically overcame him.

"Hey, Ger," he managed to utter a familiar greeting before reaching out to touch the rough marble, once smooth but now slightly pitted after the decades of exposure to the elements. "I'm sorry it's been so long," he added in a cracking voice, wishing he could kneel down out of respect while remembering the first time he found the courage to visit this very spot many years before with Mary at his side to present a crying armful of a firstborn son and namesake in Daniel Fitzgerald. As it turned out, that was to be the only time he ever brought anyone else here as Gerry's loss became something very personal that Frank had tucked away, and the elder Reagans never mentioned again. Over the following decades he had made infrequent visits alone whenever travel brought him to the area, but there had been none since his wife's death as the loss of the two most essential components of his youth was just too much to face.

Erin slipped her arm around his after leaning over to lay a small spray of red and white carnations tied in blue ribbons at the base–one of many she had thoughtfully brought along from the city in a tote knowing that the men in the family would have never remembered such a thing.

"He brought the whole family this time; I'm sorry we didn't get to meet you in person, Gerry," she murmured while leaning in close to her father for comfort as she knew it was difficult for Frank to show such emotion openly. "But thank you for keeping my Dad and the others safe."

"And for pushing him and Mom back together," Jamie added from the side as he recalled the stories about his parents' somewhat rocky start before marriage as he offered his wife a reassuring hug. "If he was anything like me, he needed that."

"None of us would be together if it weren't for you and that car," Eddie agreed as she remembered the tale of Gerry's dream Chevelle and how its influence first tore Frank and Mary apart before finally repairing their rift, just as it had nearly taken Jamie's life in that horrible accident not too far from where they stood. Now though it felt as if he was truly on the road to being healed with his leg growing stronger every day, having faced his fears with that infamous blue car being claimed back from Malevsky and currently parked in the shed behind their own house. Grateful to have him so close and whole both physically and mentally, Eddie leaned into her husband's touch and then down to kiss baby Joey on the forehead.

"Thank you for that," she added emotionally with a tribute to a man few in the Reagan clan had ever heard of until recently.

"Our family owes you everything, Gerald," Henry added as he remembered his ex-partner's sometimes rough-around-the-edges and reluctantly enlisted son who had come good in the end and saved the lives of the men in his platoon, Frank's included, in an act of completely unselfish heroism by curling his own body around a grenade in the seconds before it exploded. "Semper Fi, son," he added while laying his hand fondly on the top of the stone. "Betty and I were proud of you, and I know your parents were too. God rest all of your souls. I always told Mick and Ruthie you were a good kid even when they worried."

"Thank you for your service, Marine," Danny concluded as he was the last to reach out and touch the stone to pay his respects to the man whose name he had carried, and formerly detested, all of his life. "Daniel Fitzgerald Reagan, sir," he introduced himself proudly with a salute. "It's an honor."

 _"The brave die never, though they sleep in dust: Their courage nerves a thousand living men_ ," Frank quoted Minton Savage as he looked around before laying one last sad glance at Gerry's plain marker.

"That's something I want the three of you to remember," he added with a directed look at his oldest grandchildren in Jack, Sean and particularly Nicki who knew better but had still offered some protest at being dragged out of their beds at such an early hour for a four-hour drive to accompany the adults here. "God-willing you'll never have to come to this place to visit your family members or friends someday, but if hadn't been for this man, Commander Rigsby, and all the others you see here, you wouldn't have the life and freedoms that you do. Don't ever take them for granted."

"Amen," Henry offered as he looked around the circle of somber faces. "And we still have a few more to see today. Erin and Nicki are coming with us," he indicated with a hopeful look at his grandsons who had yet to make a final peace with each other after the events that followed Malevsky's ambush up on that mountain.

"So, I guess you two boys are going out together then since Eddie is taking the little ones back to the room, right? Might give you a chance to talk since you've both been so busy changing diapers lately," he prodded lightheartedly, hoping that perhaps Jamie and Danny would finally open up to each other in this place surrounded by thousands of those who had faced such circumstances, and particularly the three men that had been with Danny on that fateful day years before when all of this had started.

"Me? Uh, no. Joey kept us up last night, so I'm kinda tired, and my leg's starting to hurt, Pop. Besides, Danny's got the boys for company," Jamie quickly shrugged off that suggestion and needed conversation once more as despite the air of euphoria and forgiveness he felt immediately after his release from house arrest and Joey's subsequent birth, it was evident to everyone else, at least, that there was still a significant rift lingering in the brother's relationship, even if the youngest sibling still refused to admit it.

"Not like he never wanted me to be around any of this before, anyway," he added slightly under his breath as a little of that hidden resentment reappeared as he took Eddie's arm and moved off. "C'mon, Ed. We need to get the baby and Kaylin inside. We'll see everyone later. Stop by when you're done… just over that way, room 419 at the Westwood on Orme Street."

In the months since, try as he might, he still couldn't understand why his brother had frozen at that moment when Mathew Malevsky had come within a whisker of taking both their lives, and then later failed once again to come to his defense when he was accused and nearly indicted for Mason's death. Even though he knew in his heart it had more to do with Danny's long-hidden PTSD than anything else, every time he looked at Eddie with their son in her arms, the realization of what had been nearly taken from them hit hard again. On today of all days after just watching a good friend laid to rest, he just didn't have it in him to face his brother.

"He'll come around," Henry encouraged his oldest grandson with a hand on the shoulder while Danny looked on as his brother turned his back on him once more. "I shouldn't have pushed him like that today when he's upset over Rigs. I just thought maybe being here…"

"That he'd finally listen," Danny sighed as he recalled the traumatic events he'd experienced a world away from this place on Jamie's seventeenth birthday which had continued to haunt him for since. "I don't know, Pop… maybe he's just not ready. It took me years of denying it and months of talking to the doc to be able to admit why I did those things. Jamie went through hell that night on the hill, and all of this is just stirring it up again. I don't blame him for still being pissed at me. I just wish he'd give me a chance to explain."

"Keep trying," Frank advised his son knowingly. "Reagan men are a stubborn breed, so sometimes it takes a while to get through to us… at least that's what your mother always told me," he sadly sighed as he looked back at Gerry's grave. "And believe me, she knew that better than anyone after what I put her through over this. What Jamie faced afterward with Malevsky and those damn charges didn't help, and all of this is still raw for him."

"For me too," Danny sighed as he watched his brother walking away with a present limp as he grew fatigued—that part of his excuse had obviously been genuine. "Alright, boys," he added as he gave up on that cause for now before gathering Jack and Sean up beside him to go off on some other unfinished business. "It's about time I introduce you to a few of my heroes."

###

"Hey, thanks for putting munchie down and keeping an eye on him for me. He was getting cranky, and I was just so hot and sweaty from standing out there with him in that carrier. I'm done; it's all yours if you want," Eddie walked out of the shower with her wet hair done up once again in a towel and gently tried to nudge her husband back to sorts from the chair where he was sitting protectively watching while Kaylin played with some toys on the floor and Joey was napping peacefully in the wash basket on the bed they were using as a portable bassinet during their travels since he was still so tiny.

"Jamie, you can stand down now," she added when he didn't respond and continued to stare intently at their sleeping son as if he was trying to absorb every aspect of the baby's features.

"Huh? Oh, yeah, sorry. I was just…" he paused and trailed off before looking back again as Joey wrinkled his little nose and squirmed slightly before settling back down.

"I know," Eddie softly murmured as she joined him on the oversized chair, his hand slipping under her housecoat and wrapping around to pull her into his lap. "He's so perfect, sometimes I can just sit and watch him like that for hours."

"It's not that… it's… I can't stop thinking I almost missed all this," he managed to whisper with a lump growing in his throat. "That night on the hill, and then after…"

"But you didn't," Eddie reiterated a little more strongly as she also sensed that it was time for Jamie to finally open up about what occurred and start to put it in the past—and that could not happen until he finally made his peace with his brother.

"Quincy seems to be taking it okay," she started instead, hoping that realization would nudge her husband in the right direction. "He was so close to Rigs I thought this would be harder for him, but he didn't show any emotion this morning."

"And he won't… not in front of anyone; that's the SEAL in him, I guess. Those guys are tough."

"Too tough, maybe."

"No, he's just really been focused on making sure everything comes off right with the funeral. There was so much to do the past few weeks, I guess it kept him busy enough to take his mind off of all of that," Jamie admitted, not realizing that things had been much the same for him for the last six months—a point Eddie was ready to make obvious. "Plus, I mean Annabel's been there to help, so..."

"So maybe that was something else Rigs did on purpose," Eddie interjected. "I mean he put him in charge of all that to keep him busy. But when it's all over, Quincy's going to have to sit down and deal with everything, and that's going to be the hardest part… and it's kinda where you are, lambchop," she added softly. "You're almost done with your rehab, the court stuff is over, and you're settling into your new job, plus our munchie here is safe and sound… now you have to finish this thing with Danny. It's never going to be over until you do."

"Ed, just stop, please," he sighed, growing overly frustrated since it seemed like everyone was on the same wavelength about this particular subject today and the unrelenting push was now on from each member of the Reagan family. "It's over and done! I already dealt with this!"

"Don't 'Ed' me or try to put that one past us! Everyone else can see what it's doing to both of you! All you and Danny do now is avoid each other, and it's getting worse!"

"That's not even true!" he defended as his voice edged louder despite the presence of their children in the room and Kaylin looked up in surprise to hear her father speaking in that tone which did not abate until she scurried over to hide under the bed covers as was still her habit whenever there was tension raised in a conversation.

"We are getting along!" he hissed at a lower volume instead while cursing himself after witnessing his sensitive daughter's reaction. "It isn't like we're not speaking or anything! Joey even has Daniel for a middle name! Would I have done that if I was still mad at him?"

"No, but you're not talking about _this,"_ Eddie emphasized before deciding to press further even though this was turning into a bigger confrontation that she had intended.

"Jamie, just give him a chance to say his peace. He wants to explain why it happened, and I know there's been a whole thing between you since you were kids, but it's time to let go now… for both of you."

"Let go?" Jamie repeated as the root of that long-repressed anger finally bubbled to the surface before he wiggled out of the chair and stood looking down at his wife who had not anticipated her little nudge would set him off this hard. "LET GO?" he cried despite his intentions as the volume notched back up. "Eddie, is that what you really want me to do? I could have LET GO that night on that hill up in the cold! Do you know how close I came? DO YOU? Or what I had to think about? I figured my leg was already gone, but that didn't even matter because all I could see when I closed my eyes to LET GO was YOU raising Kaylin and our baby by yourself! That's the only reason I kept fighting and threw myself down into that ravine and crawled out to get to Dad, but only after I had to lay there alone all night and wonder why Danny let that happened… why he didn't help me… and why after all that NO ONE was coming to look for me!"

"Jamie, he was in surgery, and we were told…" Eddie choked up as she remembered that night when she had been informed her husband's charred body was lying next to a burnt-out car. "We were told you were gone," she added with a pointed look at Kaylin to remind him there were little ears present. "I didn't believe that, but everyone just thought I was being the hysterical pregnant wife that couldn't accept it!"

"But he knew!" Jamie continued as the dam had finally broken and raw feelings of being abandoned in that manner continued to surge. "All that talk I heard forever about him being a soldier and not leaving anyone behind, and there he was letting me down… that's all I could think of, and okay, maybe he couldn't help or remember that night, but then afterward for months when I was under house arrest and had to be afraid I'd lose my life to Malevsky in prison anyway… all that time he couldn't talk to me about it or tell anyone else what really happened! I almost missed seeing Joey born because of it and we had no idea if he was going to be okay! Eddie, he almost kept me from my own son! Danny was supposed to be such a damn hero all these years… the ultimate big brother… the hardass detective… the effing Marine tough guy everyone could always count on just like Dad did with Gerry, or Quincy did with Rigs, only for me when the time came, he didn't step up, I DID!" his voice cracked before continuing. "He just let everything implode around me instead and according to everyone else… I'M SUPPOSED JUST TO LET THAT GO?! WELL, MAYBE I CAN'T!"

"AND MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T! Not until after you say all that again… but to him, Jamie! It has to come out! You can't bottle it up, not this time! Look what happened when you tried to do that with your mom," Eddie pleaded calmly, knowing his tendency to do just that with painful memories. These emotions had finally been brought to the surface here due to Rigs' loss, but the window would very likely close soon.

"Danny needs to hear all that from you… every bit of it, as much as you need to say it out loud, and then you need to listen to him explain. There has to be a reason for it… one that's just as hard for him to talk about, and once you know what it is, then maybe you'll be able to forgive him, okay? Both of you," she empathized and got to her feet to go hug him while looking directly into his troubled eyes. "Because he's holding it against himself too!"

"I…" Jamie hesitated with a sigh of sudden defeated resignation knowing his wife was absolutely right as she squeezed him tighter for strength. "Ed, I just don't know…"

"Whatever it is, we'll deal with that together just like always; I promise," she urged, interrupting his thoughts again as she sensed he was on the edge of conceding. "Go find Danny so you can put it to rest here where it all started when you were hit by that car, and then leave it. You managed to forgive that thing," she reminded him of the infamous Chevelle's newly found place of honor in their backyard shed.

"I just don't know what I ever did to deserve you," he folded and embraced her back, finally ready to do as she asked.

"And me 'n Joe-Joe, too," a precocious Kaylin reminded as she finally felt safe enough to emerge from her hiding place to come over and mirror her mother's actions.

"And you and Joey, too," Jamie agreed while enjoying a few more minutes of family closeness before reluctantly setting off to confront his brother in a place where they both had regrets to bury.

* * *

Apologies _for the long delay in getting these epilogue chapters finished; I started and stopped a thousand times but my muse was definitely roaming elsewhere for a time and life, in general, has been busy and complicated the past few months! One final chapter will bring this saga and the second series to an end as Jamie and Danny finally have their long-awaited moment of closure._


	111. Epilogue: I See Fire – Part II

Epilogue: I See Fire – Part II

 **SEAL Rule #9: So, if you want to change the world, start singing when you're up to your neck in mud**.

* * *

Uncertain of where to look for Danny in the 624 acres of the dead that made up Arlington National Cemetery, Jamie found himself predictably wandering back toward the area of Rigs' earlier internment site which had been covered over in the meantime and already appeared disconcertingly undisturbed. The only carryover from the morning's services was a solitary figure that sat rigidly in the stifling heat still dressed in a full uniform on a bench in the distance under the shade of the very same trees where Eddie had taken shelter earlier.

"Quince?" Jamie asked gently after walking up to join his friend whose attention did not waver from that spot on the ground noted now with only a small marker before a proper headstone could be delivered. "Hey, bud, are you okay? Where's Annabel?" he asked, surprised and a bit concerned to find his former rookie's new beau alone without her in close attendance.

"Oh, Ice… Jesus," Quincy uncharacteristically startled, so intent was his stare as he clutched an unopened envelope in his hands. "Didn't hear you coming. She… um, she went back to her hotel room to change. I just…"

"You weren't ready to leave yet," Jamie commiserated as he took a seat next to him. "I get it."

"Yeah," his newfound buddy trailed off for a few more quiet moments before adding somberly.

"You want to know somethin'?"

"What?"

"This is the first one of these I've ever been to," Quincy sadly admitted as he looked around. "Even before with my Gram. She passed when I was in the hospital, and they cremated her and sent her to me in a box. I was too young when my mom OD'd… never even asked where she was. I think the city took care of it."

"What about after you enlisted? None?" Jamie asked, surprised given the dangers of the job and thinking back to the many such services he'd attended over the years—hell, just the ones with the last name of Reagan were enough to fill most cards, but there had been numerous others killed in the line of duty including his very own partner in Officer Vincent Cruz.

"When I was on a mission, I stayed there. We lost guys, sure… but if someone from our unit went down, we didn't get to dwell on it. I don't know, leaving Rigs here… it just don't seem right."

"Well, I've been to a lot, and it never seems right, but it does help to have someplace to come when you need to," Jamie admitted as he thought about the frequent trips to the cemetery in Bay Ridge where he would go to feel closer to his own personal losses. "I visit Joe and my mom a lot when I'm back home."

"Doubt I'll be coming back here too often," Quincy confessed as he glanced around and continued the morbid commentary. "Pretty lucky not to be somewhere like this myself. I never really gave that a thought either… what would happen after, I mean," he sighed, referring back to a very dark time and the father-figure he had just lost who had come and saved him from himself. "Did you?"

"Me?" Jamie shifted uncomfortably given the conversation he had just left with his wife. "About that? No… about what Eddie would go through… yeah, I thought about that a lot."

"I didn't have anyone left to care at that time… at least I didn't think so," Quincy continued and shared a disturbing truth. "Not until Rigs showed up in the middle of the night. I had it calculated in my head that I needed to hoard one more morning's worth of pills to be safe before I had enough to check out permanently."

"And you were ready?" Jamie asked, uncomfortable at the notion of his friend being at such a low point.

"No, but I thought I was. Rigs never told me how he knew," Quincy shook his head sadly. "He just did. Jumped a transport from San Diego and bulled his way into the hospital around 3 am, found my stash, flushed it and then parked himself down in the chair next to my bed and stared at me without saying another word for the next six hours. If you thought Rigs was scary when he was yelling… pretty sure I was afraid to blink when he wasn't," he managed a small smile. "But he waited until I was ready to talk, and then he just stayed there and listened for three days. I guess maybe that's why I'm sitting here… hoping he'd do the same. But he's never gonna, is he, Ice?"

"Yeah, he will," Jamie tried to encourage. "No matter what you believe, you can still talk to him. There're times I know Joe is with me when I need help… like when Joey was born. But you have me and my family and Annabel now too," he reminded firmly. "You're not alone, and you never will be again. Rigs saw to that, and I'm the one that should be thanking him. If it hadn't been for the two of you… I wouldn't be here either. After Danny left me up there…" he trailed off, getting caught out still holding that against his brother as Quincy gave him a little frown, knowing he wasn't the only one that had unfinished business here. "I needed to use everything the two of you taught me, like rule number nine. What was that from?"

"Hell Week," Quincy quietly added as he turned to face the grave again. "If you want to change the world, start singing when you're up to your neck in mud," he quoted with a sigh. "Six days of no sleep and constant physical and mental harassment followed by spending 15 hours buried up to your necks in the freezing cold Mud Flats outside the Tijuana slues with all the instructors screaming at you to quit and trying to get in your head. The only way to survive that is to mentally uncheck and start singing to drown them out, no matter how bad it sounds."

"It gives you hope," Jamie agreed. "That's what I did that night to make it through, even with no voice left from the smoke."

"That's what Rigs told me to do when he sat next to my bed," Quincy remembered. "I thought he was crazy, but he said I had to stop listening to those voices telling me I wouldn't make it. When I couldn't… or wouldn't… he went down the hall and came back with a CD player he jacked from the lounge or someone else's room; I don't even know where he got it from. Didn't even bother to see what was in it before he plugged it in and turned up the volume," he cringed at the memory. "Said if I wasn't going to talk, then we were going to sit there together, learn the words to whatever came on and sing it until I got it in my head that taking the easy way out was not an acceptable option."

"Really? So, what was it?" Jamie asked, his curiosity peaked.

"The soundtrack from one of The Hobbit movies: The Desolation of Smaug," Quincy quoted and dropped his head back to laugh from his soul for the first time in weeks as he felt a bit of that needed release while his fingers nervously traced the stiff contents of the still unopened slightly oversized envelope still in his hands.

"Can you imagine finding that in the middle of a military hospital? You should have seen his face, man… I think he was expecting some badass guitar anthem from the Stones or something. No one ever fessed up to missing it, and he was a such a stubborn son-of-a-bitch that he went with it even though the only track he could stomach on there was from that crazy-looking English Ed Sheeran dude… _'_ _Oh, misty eye of the mountain below,'"_ he hummed and sang some key phrases uncharacteristically off tune for someone who normally had a powerful, true voice. _"Keep careful watch of my brothers' souls. And should the sky be filled with fire and smoke, keep watching over Durin's sons… If this is to end in fire… Then we should all burn together… Watch the flames climb high into the night... And if we should die tonight… Then we should all die together. Raise a glass of wine for the last time."_

 _"_ By the time we were done, the whole floor was chiming in. I'll never forget it," he finished emotionally. "They all understood where I was at, and I remembered no matter where I was in the world, I'd still have brothers and sisters there who gave a damn. He saved my life that night, Ice. I never quit after that, but whenever I feel like it, or think someone around me is gonna give up…"

"You sing," Jamie concluded as he recalled hearing that deep, baritone voice echoing down the hall so many times all hours of the day while they were both recovering in the hospital—a voice that had carried him through some equally desolate nights. "Like you did for me."

"Yeah."

"What's in the envelope, Quince?" Jamie prodded as if he didn't know already given the familiar squared outline of the shape that his friend's nervous fingers had worked and folded around the object inside.

"The last thing he left in his box of stuff for me to do," the younger man confirmed. "Wasn't supposed to open it up until now after he was in the ground, but I probably don't need to," he choked up even though that's exactly what he did. "Crazy bastard kept it all this time; I knew it," he muttered as he slid a thin, plain plastic case out containing that infamous, pilfered CD and a single, folded sheet of stationery.

"Guess he didn't want me ever to forget," he continued while reading the Commander's final, crisply-written orders. "Or you either… says I need to make sure we both have our shit together before I play this one last time while we raise a glass to him tonight. So," he looked up with a challenge. "Do you? 'Cause I ain't gonna say otherwise or lie to the man before I do that. Knowing him, he'd find a way to come back and kick my ass for it."

"No," Jamie resolved as he finally spotted his brother and nephews in the distance slowly working their way back in that direction after having made their sad rounds among Danny's former platoon mates. "No, I don't have mine straightened out yet, but I will by then… already promised Ed I'd take care of it today before we go home so I can't take that back," he stated just as Annabel's name lit up on Quincy's phone with an incoming text inquiring where he was, no doubt she was keeping close tabs on him as well.

"You going to be okay, Quince?"

"Yeah, I'm gonna be alright, and you will too once you get it out just like I did," Quincy nodded in honest belief before finally getting up himself to go join her at the hotel. "Speaking of which…" he led with a nod towards the approaching Reagans. "There's no time like the present. If it helps, I'll stay here with you."

"Probably not a good idea," Jamie sighed. "This is between him and me… always has been, ever since we were kids."

"Well, like you said, we're family now, so I have your back, and I'm gonna make Rigs proud of where I go from here too," he added while standing up straight and tall courtesy of Kenzie's groundbreaking orthopedic work and a top-notch prosthetist back in New York.

"Now, do the same thing and don't chicken out. Have that conversation here in front of him, so it's finished before we ring that bell tonight."

###

"I swear, Dad… would you stop already! We don't have to go back down there! I already told you I saved everything you need to my phone. It's better than that crappy old camera you brought along. You can see the stuff at home; it'll be fine!" Jack insisted, his temper growing short in a typical put-upon teenaged way as Danny was insisting on perfection for an amateur volunteer effort.

"This has to be right!" Danny growled back at his oldest son, his nerves already frayed and close to the breaking point, feeling frustrated himself since this video idea of his felt like a completely trivial way to honor these men in the first place but he had been unable to come up with any other options when put on point. "That goddamn Malevsky promised the families I would have some kind of testimonial for the anniversary… he made them relive everything and dig out their medals and pictures to send them here so he could screw with me. What else am I gonna do?"

"How about just tell them the truth?" Jack snapped back irritably. "Say you weren't gonna do anything in the first place!"

"It's hot. Can't we just go over to Uncle Jamie and Aunt Eddie's hotel room now?" Sean whined, trying his best to intervene and diffuse the inevitable escalation, having been initially very engaged in learning about the history of this place and the stories of the men his father served with, but now soured by the constant bickering between Danny and his older brother which was a carryover from the arrival of Kitty Elise in their lives. Despite his mother's intense happiness over the new baby, or maybe because of it, Jack was still not on board with the latest addition to the family and tempers remained short in the little Staten Island house. The fact that the infant had been colicky and inconsolable over the past weeks had certainly not helped the matter since Linda's attention and time had to be devoted to her even as her oldest son was feeling insecure while preparing to leave for college the following month.

"Jack!" Danny fumed at his oldest, finding himself stopping just short of being disrespectful in a place where that would never be acceptable. After a chance glace past his son's flushed face revealed Jamie in the distance sitting alone on a bench at the top of the hill near Rigs' grave, he surprisingly remained at a loss for words in an atypical Daniel Reagan fashion.

"What?" his oldest pressed.

"Go back to the room; I need to talk to your uncle… alone," he ordered instead after a moment, something about the way his youngest brother was sitting there waiting made it clear that it was finally time for that long-avoided exchange, even at the expense of letting his son walk off without resolving their current conflict. That would have to wait—hopefully, for less than the near fifteen years it took to get to this point with Jamie.

"Huh? That's it? We can just leave?" Jack briefly balked before being quickly interrupted by Sean who knew they were being gifted with a way out of a sticky situation.

"C'mon, that's what he said," the youngest Reagan present hurriedly pushed his brother back toward the road with no other options offered. "Besides, I'm hungry, and Aunt Eddie always has lots of good stuff to eat around. Let's go."

"So, the boys are headed back to the room," Danny covered once his sons had departed and he was in earshot of his brother, hoping that Jamie had not overheard that little exchange with Jack. "Hey, did you hear me?" he followed with when he drew closer, and there was no response. "You okay?"

"Yeah, just wondering," Jamie finally replied as he continued to stare straight ahead in much the same way Quincy had been.

"Wondering what? Rigs is gone, kid. There's nothing to look at here."

"Just that… what he saw in me that you never did," Jamie returned bluntly, ripping the Band-Aid directly off that old wound. "And I'm not a kid anymore, Danny."

"No, I know that; I do," his older brother admitted as he sat down heavily on the bench preparing to come clean finally. "But you were when all of this started. I guess you're ready to hear about it now."

"Been ready for months," came the short and blunt reminder. "You were the one holding back all this time."

"Yeah, so," Danny started with regret as he could already feel the tension brimming in his stomach before deciding to press on. "Remember that call on your seventeenth birthday when I was overseas?"

"The one where you reamed me out for telling you I decided to apply to Harvard? I could repeat it word for word," Jamie fired back as he too recalled that heated conversation.

 _"That's what you wanted to tell me? That I'm busting my ass here every day away from my wife and son, so you can go up there with a bunch of other privileged do-nothing bookends to sit around, smoke a little weed and discuss everything we're doing wrong over here? Coming from our family, do you even know what it means to serve?"_

 _"No, but I know I hate you! You're always such a hardass! Nothing I ever do is right! So now you're pissed off that I don't want to be a cop when you spent my whole life telling me I wasn't cut out for it?! Why can't you ever just be happy for me?!" Jamie had finally cried in utter frustration before angrily slamming down the phone and effectively severing their ties._

"Pretty hard to forget since we didn't speak after that for months… you were that ashamed of me," he continued.

"No, I _wasn't,_ not really," Danny started to adamantly defend even though it was the truth as he allowed himself to go back to that awful day in Fallujah once again. "It just sounded that way. I mean at that time when we were on the phone, yeah, maybe I was a little. You were going Ivy League and at that time… in that place… that horrible place… it was against everything I was and what I was fighting for every day."

"And you knew I was only doing it because of Mom when I just wanted to be like everyone else," Jamie refuted as he glanced over. "You _knew_ I wanted to be a cop, but then you said she was right all along and I was too damn soft; that no one would ever be able to count on me to have their backs, and I would never make it on the street like you and Joe, so I should go to Harvard and hide behind the books because that's all I was good for."

"Yeah, and I regretted laying all that shit off on you as soon as I said it, but you know me… I never could shut my mouth. Listen, kid, I was having a bad time over there; guys were going down left and right around me, and I was scared and wondering what the hell I had gotten myself into. You know what they say about bullies being the biggest cowards… well, instead of admitting that I was afraid, I took it out on you, Jay. If I would have known," he paused with a hard swallow given the memories of the horrific events to follow that conversation now flooding back as if they had just happened. "If I had known what was going to go down right after we talked, I would have never said those things, but I did, and it messed me up."

"Messed _you_ up? Seriously? You were pissed I was going to be a lawyer and not a cop, and then when you came back you were pissed when I decided to leave law after Joe and go to the academy," Jamie countered, pointing out the obvious inconsistencies with his older brother's stance. "What do you think it did to me? Do you know how effed up that is? And then that night at the car…" he trailed off as the heart of the matter was finally addressed before adding quietly. "I wasn't the one that froze. You put it all on me and then afterward when I felt like my whole world was falling apart, I still didn't have a big brother to lean on! I was there for you, Dan, and you left me out there alone!"

"I know you were," Danny returned. "You stepped up, and I didn't. Jamie, that night," he stuttered in a low voice racked with guilt as he closed his eyes and once again recalled with absolute vivid detail that awful event in Fallujah that had been shoved into the darkest recesses of his mind and yet still haunted him in the background all these years.

"That night I froze because…" he trailed off and teetered on the edge of finally revealing the reasons why. "Because I couldn't get past something that happened right after we fought on your birthday all those effing years ago. I was still pissed at you when I went out to patrol that night and caught an insurgent trying to breach the perimeter of our camp. He was dressed in one of our uniforms and I… I shot him," he admitted slowly and painfully as his brother glanced over in surprise. "He was just a kid like you; he… I swear he even _looked_ like you when they rolled him over and I watched him bleed out on the ground from a bullet in his chest that I put there. In my nightmares ever since it _was_ you, Jamie. I can't tell you how many times I've woken up shaking in a cold sweat and thinking it was true. _That's_ why I acted that way after I came back. It just got worse after you took yourself out of law and put on a badge. Then I was afraid it would happen here, so the dream stayed the same, but the color of your uniform changed."

"Dan," Jamie immediately softened as he too tried to process that shocking revelation and his brother's first admittance as to what was truly behind his PTSD. "It wasn't me."

"But it could have been. I panicked, and all I could think of was that I shot you, and you shouldn't have been there because you weren't one of us," Danny continued. "My buddies were congratulating me for killing a kid. It's… it's something I still can't get out of my head sometimes, you know? I never even told Linda until I had to see the shrink. I know everyone thinks that I was messed up when Jimmy, Mike, and Stevie went down, and I got out of that firefight alive, hell, even I thought so, but it started way before that. So much for being a hardass, huh? I took away somebody's son and brother before he even had a chance to live and they gave me a damn medal for it! Then that night in the car when I watched you fall to the ground the same way… I don't know why but it came back again like it had just happened at the absolute worst time and that's all I could see. Dr. Morris said it's because you were hurt and being around guys like Quincy and Rigs stirred everything all up again since I never dealt with it in the first place."

"So, all these years," Jamie tried to understand. "All the times you put me down for being on the job or asking about when you served…"

"Was because I never wanted you to be a part of it," Danny admitted. "Because if you talked about all that the nightmares would come back, and I couldn't handle that. It had nothing to do with you being capable or not. I know I've always thought of you as a kid, but after watching everything you went through… you're as tough as anyone out here. You risked everything to save my life, and you would have made a great soldier, just like you were a damn fine street cop… best I ever saw. Back then though, you were the one thing in my life that wasn't touched… you were still that goofy kid brother of mine. I needed that, and I'm still glad you didn't have to see what they had to… what I did. I'm not proud of it."

"But you didn't have a choice, did you?"

"It was my choice to go over there, wasn't it? I had a job to do in the NYPD, but I left Linda and Jack alone here at home, all because I was pissed and wanted vengeance after 9/11… well, I got it, didn't I? I took it out on a kid just like you. They grabbed locals from the villages and forced them to go on suicide missions like that into our camps, and I pulled the trigger on him."

"I'm sorry for what you _had_ to do," Jamie emphasized. "That's how you have to think of it. I just wish we had known all this time. You shouldn't have tried to deal with that alone."

"And I'm sorry for what I _didn't_ do, Jay. I'm sorry I let you down that night and all those months after when you were under house arrest for killing Malevsky. That should have been my bullet that put him down and my cross to bear with the prosecutor, not yours. Hell, it was before that. I'm sorry for taking all this shit out on you for all of these years. I wish to God it never happened like that, but it did, and there isn't anything I regret more. If you hadn't made it off that hill in one piece or missed Joey being born or any of it… I would never have forgiven myself."

Several moments of silence went by as the two Reagan brothers sat silently side-by-side trying to process what had been revealed before the sounds of rifle fire in the distance announced the close to another sad chapter as someone else's loved one was laid to rest in another part of the expansive fields.

"I'm just glad I was there for you… this time and back then, and I never would have thought less of you, Danny… you'll always be my big, fearless, badass brother." Jamie finally acknowledged as he sat back against the bench and looked in the distance at all the endless headstones minus Rigs' as he felt all the anger that he'd held against his brother ebb away. Surely every stone marked untold stories of remorse like what had come between the two in the years since.

"Thanks, kid. I don't want this between us anymore. I'm just glad it worked out in the end."

"I think there's probably a lot of things like that and ghosts buried here, so it's time to leave it and move on, brother; this is the place where it stays. C'mon, there's just one thing left for us to do."

###

"Please raise a glass," Quincy softly ordered while everyone in attendance slowly gathered around the historic old bar top with drinks in hand and gave him the floor as he sought to bring the proceedings to an end after an evening of stories and remembrance for Rigs. He fought back the sting in his eyes as he looked around and focused on a number of those who had made such a difference in his life in the last six months: Kenzie and Rick who would continue her life-changing work at a new facility in Arizona; the Reagans who had welcomed him into their family without hesitation highlighted by Eddie clinging to Jamie's arm as he stood there solidly in support of his new friend, with Erin doing the same for Danny, and most of all Annabel who stepped up to join him in the front and had continued to be a bright light through all of this sorrow.

"Everyone here knows the Commander had his own way of doing things, and tonight isn't gonna be any different," he continued while hitting the play button and knocking another thing off his checklist as the cued up requested song began.

 _Oh, misty eye of the mountain below  
_ _Keep careful watch of my brothers' souls…_

"I know all of you have your own reasons for being here, and most of them are because in one way or another if Rigs didn't flat out pull your butt out of the line of fire, his rules somehow made an impression on you, but for me he gave me all that and something I never had before in my whole life: a family beyond my Grams that I could count on. You all know my story and what he did for me, and if it hadn't been for him bringing me to Kenzie and introducing me to Ice, Annie, and the rest of the Reagans, I wouldn't be standing here before you or have a path to take like I do, so for that I'll be forever thankful and I want him to know I'll spend the rest of my life payin' it forward somehow."

 _If this is to end in fire  
_ _Then we should all burn together  
_ _Watch the flames climb high into the night…_

"Before he died, he asked me to play this song for his final toast. I never quite got all the meaning he saw behind it until now. I mean, those of you that spent any time around him get that this was kinda way out of his wheelhouse, but in this letter he wrote that to him it was about seeing the fire coming and facing the end with courage and love for one another in our hearts, and that was all Rigs," Quincy paused and choked up while Annabel gave his arm a squeeze for comfort.

 _And if we should die tonight  
_ _Then we should all die together  
_ _Raise a glass of wine for the last time…_

"He wanted all of us to be together one last time and know that we shouldn't be afraid to live before we die… that there is beauty even in the end."

 _And if the night is burning  
_ _I will cover my eyes  
_ _For if the dark returns then  
_ _My brothers will die…_

"To me, it's all about the greatest man I ever knew telling us to look out for each other now that he's gone, and that we should stand strong until the end… so, I hope everyone gets that."

 _And I see fire, hollowing souls  
_ _And I see fire, blood in the breeze  
_ _And I hope that you'll remember me…_

"In SEAL training, for those of you that don't know, there's a big brass bell that hangs in the center of the compound for everyone to see," Quincy revealed as he took a step towards an old replica of the same hanging on the corner post which was traditionally used for the last call. "All you have to do to quit is ring that bell," he continued as he reluctantly put his hand on the cord. "Ring that bell, and you no longer have to put up with the freezing cold swims, or the runs, the obstacle course, the PT or any of the other hardships of training including the screaming Commander you learned to love and hate for what he put you through. I can't tell you how many times in my life I just wanted to ring that bell," he admitted after a pause as he fingered the satin, preparing to do as directed to follow through in the moment in accordance with Rigs' final wishes and signify the end of his battle.

"I know I'm supposed to do this for you, but I ain't gonna you old SOB," he murmured softly to himself and the surrogate father that had seen him this far. "I ain't gonna do it, and neither did he," Quincy reiterated firmly to the rest of the group while shaking his head. "He never quit until he saw us all through. If you want to respect what Rigs stood for, then take on something every day and change what you can for the better; find someone to help you in the tough times and care for each other; know that life isn't always fair and that you will fail often, but if you take some risks and step up when the times are toughest and never, ever give up… if you do these things, then you will have changed the world for the by those rules, especially the last one," he added before raising his glass and adding a slightly altered quote from George Patton that he had settled on after much discussion with Frank.

"To Commander Joel Rigsby. _It is foolish and wrong to mourn the man who died. Rather we should thank God that such a man lived."_

"Hear, hear," came the echo from everyone else in the room as this chapter came to an end.

 **SEAL Rule #10: If you want to change the world don't ever, ever ring the bell.**

-fin-

* * *

 _So, I'm happy to put this one to bed **finally** but sad to say goodbye to some of my favorite OC's in Kenzie, Rick, and Rigs from this second series as it comes to an end. At least we'll hang on to Quincy for the time being as it feels like J needs a buddy going forward. I've been jumping around in my writing a bit and have several new stories started including the start of Series III entitled "This Meeting Never Happened," but a whole-house renovation is currently keeping me busy and the constant banging and contractors traipsing through has eaten into any quiet writing time I've been able to eke out for the last several months._

 _In the meantime, I do have an added little 5-chapter fun piece I wrote last summer called "Where There's a Will…" to post starting tomorrow as our lovebirds have reached that magical six-week post-partum plateau and a stymied return to intimacy awaits even as a new, minor OC comes into the picture._

 _Special thanks to everyone who followed this long journey to the end – your reviews, favs, and favorites are always fun to receive and keep me motivated!_

 _*Included lyrics from "I See Fire" Written by Ed Sheeran Universal Music Publishing Group_ _._


End file.
